1 00:01:04,481 --> 00:01:06,437 Man: Police constable Nicholas angel. 2 00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:08,523 Born and schooled in London. 3 00:01:08,652 --> 00:01:11,439 Graduated canterbury university in 1993 4 00:01:11,572 --> 00:01:14,405 with a double first in politics and sociology. 5 00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:16,857 Attended hendon college of police training. 6 00:01:18,161 --> 00:01:20,823 Displayed great aptitude in field exercises. 7 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:25,995 Notably, urban pacification and riot control. 8 00:01:26,545 --> 00:01:27,660 Back off! 9 00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:31,838 Academically excelled in theoretical course work and final year examinations. 10 00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:34,417 Received the Baton of honor 11 00:01:34,511 --> 00:01:38,550 graduated with distinction into the metropolitan police service. 12 00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:40,722 Quickly established an effectiveness 13 00:01:40,809 --> 00:01:42,674 and popularity within the community. 14 00:01:43,061 --> 00:01:44,221 Use your brain. 15 00:01:44,688 --> 00:01:47,680 Proceeded to improve skill base with courses in advanced driving 16 00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:51,729 and advanced cycling. 17 00:01:52,904 --> 00:01:56,522 Became heavily involved in a number of extra vocational activities. 18 00:01:56,617 --> 00:01:59,609 To this day holds the met record for the 100 meter dash. 19 00:02:00,537 --> 00:02:05,577 In 2001 began active duty with the renowned so19 armed response unit, 20 00:02:05,709 --> 00:02:07,290 received a bravery award for efforts 21 00:02:07,377 --> 00:02:10,039 in the resolution of operation crackdown. 22 00:02:10,547 --> 00:02:14,085 In the last 12 months has received nine special commendations. 23 00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:17,338 Achieved the highest arrest record for any officer in the met. 24 00:02:17,429 --> 00:02:20,011 And sustained three injuries in the line of duty. 25 00:02:20,098 --> 00:02:21,634 Most recently in December 26 00:02:21,725 --> 00:02:24,637 when wounded by a man dressed as father Christmas. 27 00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:28,390 Hello, Nicholas. 28 00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:29,767 Hello, sergeant. 29 00:02:29,858 --> 00:02:31,098 How's the hand? 30 00:02:31,193 --> 00:02:32,433 Still a bit stiff. 31 00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:35,273 It can get awfully hairy out there. 32 00:02:35,364 --> 00:02:37,884 I'm surprised you weren't snapped up sooner for a nice desk job. 33 00:02:37,949 --> 00:02:38,984 That's what I did. 34 00:02:39,117 --> 00:02:41,358 I prefer to think my office is out on the street. 35 00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:42,985 Indeed, you do. 36 00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:47,744 Your arrest record is 400% higher than any other officer. 37 00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:52,498 Which is why it's high time that such skills were put to better use. 38 00:02:54,383 --> 00:02:55,919 We're making you sergeant. 39 00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,169 I see. 40 00:02:57,636 --> 00:02:59,376 In sandford, Gloucestershire. 41 00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:00,548 In where, sorry? 42 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:02,129 In sandford, Gloucestershire. 43 00:03:02,224 --> 00:03:03,839 That's in the country. 44 00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:05,424 Yes, lovely. 45 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:08,039 Isn't there a sergeant's position here in London? 46 00:03:08,063 --> 00:03:09,269 No. 47 00:03:09,356 --> 00:03:10,471 Can I remain here as a PC? 48 00:03:10,565 --> 00:03:11,645 No. 49 00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:12,893 Do I have any choice in this? 50 00:03:12,943 --> 00:03:14,183 No. 51 00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:16,977 Sergeant, I kind of like it here. 52 00:03:17,072 --> 00:03:19,192 Well, you've always wanted to transfer to the country. 53 00:03:19,324 --> 00:03:20,609 In 20 years or so, yes. 54 00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:22,032 Well done, you. 55 00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,216 Hang on, I don't remember telling you that. 56 00:03:24,329 --> 00:03:26,365 Yes, you did. You said, 57 00:03:26,498 --> 00:03:29,490 "I'd love to settle down in the country sometime, Janine." 58 00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:32,492 I'd like to talk to the inspector. 59 00:03:32,587 --> 00:03:34,649 You can speak to the inspector, but I can promise you 60 00:03:34,673 --> 00:03:37,585 he will tell you exactly the same thing as I have. 61 00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:41,300 Hello, Nicholas. How's the hand? 62 00:03:41,388 --> 00:03:42,798 It's still a bit stiff. 63 00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:44,049 And how are things at home? 64 00:03:44,141 --> 00:03:45,256 I'm sorry, sir? 65 00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:46,882 How's Janine? 66 00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:50,302 We're no longer together, sir. 67 00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:51,807 Right. Then where are you living? 68 00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:53,376 He's staying at the section house, sir. 69 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:54,544 Inspector: With the recruits? 70 00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:56,354 Yes, he's living out of cardboard boxes. 71 00:03:56,445 --> 00:03:58,310 Well, then, you're packed already. 72 00:03:58,405 --> 00:04:00,133 Nicholas, we're offering you a smashing position 73 00:04:00,157 --> 00:04:01,363 with a delightful cottage, 74 00:04:01,450 --> 00:04:04,863 in a lovely little place that I think has won village of the year 75 00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:06,659 I don't know how many times. 76 00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:08,362 It'll be good for you. 77 00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:11,039 I don't really know what to say. 78 00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:12,206 Yes? 79 00:04:12,294 --> 00:04:13,909 Yes, thank you. 80 00:04:16,465 --> 00:04:18,251 No, I'm sorry. I'm gonna have to... 81 00:04:18,383 --> 00:04:19,919 You want to take this higher? 82 00:04:20,010 --> 00:04:21,295 Yes, yes, I do. 83 00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:23,364 You want me to bother the chief inspector with this? 84 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:24,423 Yes. 85 00:04:24,556 --> 00:04:25,950 You want me to get the chief inspector 86 00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:27,555 to come all the way down here? 87 00:04:27,642 --> 00:04:29,007 Yes, I do. 88 00:04:29,186 --> 00:04:30,392 Okay. 89 00:04:31,146 --> 00:04:32,386 Kenneth! 90 00:04:32,898 --> 00:04:34,638 Hello, Nicholas. How's the hand? 91 00:04:34,733 --> 00:04:36,314 Still a bit stiff. 92 00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:38,225 Chief inspector... Keep your seat. 93 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:40,527 Now, I know what you're going to say, 94 00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:43,902 but the fact is, you've been making us all look bad. 95 00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:45,072 I'm sorry, sir? 96 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:46,721 Of course we all appreciate your efforts, 97 00:04:46,745 --> 00:04:49,282 but you've been rather letting the side down. 98 00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:51,325 It's all about being a team player, Nicholas. 99 00:04:51,458 --> 00:04:53,414 You can't be the sheriff of London. 100 00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:55,288 If we let you carry on running round town, 101 00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:59,208 you'll continue to be exceptional and we can't have that. 102 00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,631 You'll put us all out of a job. 103 00:05:02,052 --> 00:05:03,713 With respect, sir. 104 00:05:03,804 --> 00:05:06,216 You can't just make people disappear. 105 00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:09,139 Yes, I can. I'm the chief inspector. 106 00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:14,478 Well, however you spin this, there's one thing you haven't taken into account. 107 00:05:14,606 --> 00:05:17,097 And that's what the "team" is gonna make of this. 108 00:05:32,624 --> 00:05:34,580 Hello? Angel: Janine, it's me. 109 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,750 I know. I'm at work. 110 00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:38,748 I know, I'm outside. 111 00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:42,247 What's the situation? 112 00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:45,425 You know the situation. We've been over this. 113 00:05:45,512 --> 00:05:46,922 No, I... I meant here. 114 00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:49,675 Two people involved, distinct signs of a struggle. 115 00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:50,926 Complete mess. 116 00:05:51,017 --> 00:05:52,302 You are talking about here? 117 00:05:52,394 --> 00:05:54,100 Nicholas, what do you want? 118 00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:55,873 Well, I have something important to tell you 119 00:05:55,897 --> 00:05:58,354 and I didn't wanna do it over the phone. 120 00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:01,767 Janine, I've been transferred. 121 00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,352 I'm moving away for a while. 122 00:06:03,530 --> 00:06:04,610 I'm not Janine. 123 00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:07,238 Janine, I've been transferred. 124 00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:08,610 I'm moving away for a while. 125 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,442 I know. Bob told me. 126 00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:11,697 Hello, there. 127 00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:13,870 Well, I wanted to tell you in person. 128 00:06:13,957 --> 00:06:16,143 And there's no reason we can't be civil with each other. 129 00:06:16,167 --> 00:06:18,020 It's not that long ago we were talking about getting married. 130 00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:20,956 Yes, but you were already married to the force, weren't you? 131 00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:22,942 We're actually supposed to call it "the service" now. 132 00:06:22,966 --> 00:06:24,297 Official vocab guidelines state 133 00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:25,624 that "force" is too aggressive. 134 00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,550 See. It's only ever about the job. 135 00:06:27,637 --> 00:06:28,717 It's all you care about. 136 00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:29,805 That's not true. 137 00:06:29,890 --> 00:06:32,802 No, you're right, you do have that rubber plant. 138 00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:34,349 It's a Japanese peace Lily. Rp 139 00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:36,677 you just can't switch off, Nicholas. 140 00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:40,981 And until you find a person you care about more than your job, 141 00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:42,557 you never will. 142 00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:45,048 Besides, you were the one who suggested 143 00:06:45,113 --> 00:06:46,649 we take a break. 144 00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:50,733 Yes, well, guilty people often make the first move. 145 00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:53,903 Actually, there's something I need to tell you. 146 00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:55,245 You're seeing someone else. 147 00:06:55,332 --> 00:06:56,492 Yes. How did you... 148 00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:58,574 Is it Bob? No. 149 00:06:58,668 --> 00:07:02,160 Does Bob look like the kind of person I'd go out with? 150 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:03,745 It's Dave 151 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:05,250 hello, there. 152 00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:07,673 I see. 153 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:10,210 Oh, Nicholas. 154 00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:13,092 You do realize that window was broken from the inside? 155 00:07:18,188 --> 00:07:22,431 Frank: Hello there, Nicholas, frank Butterman here, your new inspector. 156 00:07:22,525 --> 00:07:25,688 I'm just calling with details of your accommodation. 157 00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:28,896 We've got you a lovely little cottage on Spencer hill. 158 00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:31,781 Look forward to meeting you anon. Cheerio. 159 00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:34,534 Nicholas, frank again. 160 00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:36,202 One other thing about your cottage. 161 00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:37,619 It's not reaqly. 162 00:08:19,165 --> 00:08:22,828 It would appear the heavens have opened. 163 00:08:29,926 --> 00:08:31,837 I was hoping to check in. 164 00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:33,968 Check in? 165 00:08:34,431 --> 00:08:36,763 But you've always been here. Vi y 166 00:08:37,142 --> 00:08:38,507 excuse me? 167 00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:41,093 Oh, I'm sorry. 168 00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:42,927 I thought you were my husband. 169 00:08:43,023 --> 00:08:44,308 You must be sergeant angel. 170 00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:45,684 Yes, I am. 171 00:08:45,817 --> 00:08:46,852 I'm Joyce Cooper. 172 00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:49,104 I trust you had a pleasant trip. Fascist. 173 00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:50,897 I beg your pardon? 174 00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:54,823 "System of government characterized by extreme dictatorship." 175 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:56,319 Seven across. 176 00:08:56,703 --> 00:08:58,614 Oh, I see. It's "fascism." 177 00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:01,321 Fascism. Wonderful. 178 00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:03,490 Now, we've put you in the castle suite. 179 00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:05,997 Bernard will escort you up there. 180 00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:11,336 Well, actually, I could probably make my own way up. Hag. 181 00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:13,541 I beg your pardon? 182 00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:17,466 "Evil old woman considered frightful or ugly." It's 12 down. 183 00:09:17,682 --> 00:09:20,173 Oh, bless you. 184 00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:07,641 Pint of lager, please, Mary. 185 00:10:07,732 --> 00:10:09,472 Mary: Right you are, my love. 186 00:10:09,859 --> 00:10:11,565 Yes, sir, what can I get you? 187 00:10:11,694 --> 00:10:16,563 Could I have a glass of the cranberry juice, please? 188 00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:17,939 Certainly. 189 00:10:18,076 --> 00:10:21,489 Now, you wouldn't, by any chance, be the new policeman? 190 00:10:21,579 --> 00:10:23,615 Police officer, yes. I'm Nicholas angel. 191 00:10:23,748 --> 00:10:25,488 I'm Roy Porter. This is my wife Mary. 192 00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:26,698 Mary. 193 00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:28,367 Mary: Welcome to sandford. 194 00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,064 If there's anything you need, just let us know. 195 00:10:30,088 --> 00:10:33,330 Thank you. Could I borrow your newspaper? 196 00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:34,664 It's not ours, love. 197 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:37,341 We're not big fans of the local fish wrapper, are we, mare? 198 00:10:37,428 --> 00:10:39,214 They listed her age as 55. 199 00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:41,011 When I'm actually $3. 200 00:10:41,099 --> 00:10:42,339 Fifty-three. 201 00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:45,425 Pint of lager, please, Mary. 202 00:10:45,520 --> 00:10:47,101 Right you are, my love. 203 00:11:19,888 --> 00:11:20,923 Excuse me. 204 00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:22,049 What? 205 00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:23,220 When's your birthday? 206 00:11:23,308 --> 00:11:24,548 Twenty-second of February. 207 00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:26,633 What year? Every year. 208 00:11:26,769 --> 00:11:27,849 Get out. 209 00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:30,887 When's your birthday? 210 00:11:30,982 --> 00:11:34,224 Eighth of may, 1969. 211 00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:36,105 You're 377 yeah. 212 00:11:36,196 --> 00:11:37,311 Get out. 213 00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:38,527 When's your birthday? 214 00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:40,939 Out. 215 00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:42,987 Is there a problem, officer? 216 00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:44,567 Yes, there is, Mr. Porter. 217 00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:47,449 It would appear a number of your patrons are under age. 218 00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:50,247 Well, a few of them may be a month or two south of proper. 219 00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:53,077 But if they're in here, it stops them getting into trouble out there. 220 00:11:53,171 --> 00:11:55,412 Yeah, the way we see it, it's all for the greater good. 221 00:11:55,506 --> 00:11:56,621 The greater good. 222 00:11:56,716 --> 00:12:01,005 Well, that's as may be, but the law's the law and they'll have to go. 223 00:12:06,184 --> 00:12:07,594 Another cranberry juice? 224 00:12:07,685 --> 00:12:09,141 I'm fine, thank you. 225 00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:33,534 I hope you're not planning on driving that. 226 00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:34,868 No. 227 00:12:50,728 --> 00:12:53,720 Right. I'm taking you to the station. 228 00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,685 Where is it? 229 00:13:03,449 --> 00:13:04,564 What? 230 00:13:15,211 --> 00:13:16,371 Angel: Move. 231 00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:23,132 "Nicholas angel.” 232 00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:25,501 Oh, when did you start? 233 00:13:25,596 --> 00:13:27,052 Tomorrow. 234 00:13:27,265 --> 00:13:29,631 Well, I see you've already arrested the whole village. 235 00:13:29,767 --> 00:13:30,847 Not exactly. 236 00:13:30,935 --> 00:13:34,644 You in for the night? Go on, four's free. 237 00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:36,103 Hey, now, I need to speak to him. 238 00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:38,101 He'll be no use till the morning. 239 00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:39,349 I see. 240 00:13:39,444 --> 00:13:42,436 You really want to process all this lot? 241 00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:44,563 My pen"s running out. 242 00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:45,897 Not a problem. 243 00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:25,524 All: Morning, sergeant. 244 00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:26,615 Morning. 245 00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:27,859 Morning. 246 00:14:28,951 --> 00:14:30,111 Morning, sergeant. 247 00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:34,028 Morning, sergeant. 248 00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:40,208 Lock me up. 249 00:14:40,296 --> 00:14:41,296 I'm I ss so orry'? 250 00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:43,497 I'm a slasher and I must be stopped. 251 00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:45,419 You're a what? 252 00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:48,047 A slasher of prices. 253 00:14:49,555 --> 00:14:52,422 Just kidding. I'm Simon Skinner. 254 00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:54,553 I run the local supermarché. 255 00:14:54,644 --> 00:14:56,305 Drop in and see me sometime. 256 00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,057 My discounts are criminal. 257 00:14:58,481 --> 00:15:00,062 Catch me later! 258 00:15:02,068 --> 00:15:04,354 Morning, sergeant. 259 00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:12,108 Morning, sergeant. 260 00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:18,243 Could you tell the inspector I've arrived, please? 261 00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:20,373 No. 262 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,376 Why? 263 00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:24,578 He's not in yet. 264 00:15:25,007 --> 00:15:26,213 Well, how's our guest? 265 00:15:26,843 --> 00:15:27,958 Guest? 266 00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:29,462 The inebriate in cell four. 267 00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:32,717 I don't know. Nobody tells me nothing. 268 00:15:37,645 --> 00:15:39,476 Can I get cell four open, please? 269 00:15:39,564 --> 00:15:41,646 Danny, can you open four? 270 00:15:44,193 --> 00:15:45,308 He's gone. 271 00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:53,695 Why are you dressed like a police officer? 272 00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:55,822 Because I am one. 273 00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:59,072 Sergeant angel, at last. Frank Butterman. 274 00:16:00,251 --> 00:16:02,242 I see you've already met my boy. 275 00:16:02,336 --> 00:16:03,496 Yes. 276 00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:08,581 Frank: Do forgive me. I'm something of a wild west nut. 277 00:16:08,718 --> 00:16:10,674 Speaking of which, that was a fair few outlaws 278 00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:13,047 you rounded up last night. 279 00:16:13,222 --> 00:16:14,758 Thank you, sir. 280 00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:19,760 I admire your enthusiasm and far be it from me to stifle your flair, 281 00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:21,181 but this isn't London. 282 00:16:21,272 --> 00:16:22,603 Oh, yes, please, Danny. 283 00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:23,770 With respect, sir, 284 00:16:23,900 --> 00:16:25,380 geographical location shouldn't factor 285 00:16:27,236 --> 00:16:28,521 no, thanks. 286 00:16:28,613 --> 00:16:32,526 Statistically, sandford is the safest village in the country. 287 00:16:32,617 --> 00:16:34,778 But that doesn't mean it requires anything less 288 00:16:34,911 --> 00:16:37,368 than a careful and considered approach. 289 00:16:37,455 --> 00:16:38,599 There's a reason we accommodate 290 00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:40,363 a few of the younglings at the pub. 291 00:16:40,458 --> 00:16:41,538 The greater good? 292 00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:43,958 The greater good. Precisely. 293 00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:48,288 Your predecessor assumed that rural policing was easy. 294 00:16:49,133 --> 00:16:51,124 Ended up having a nervous breakdown. 295 00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:55,378 And sergeant popwell was an exceptional officer, truly exceptional. 296 00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:58,131 And he had one thing you haven't got. 297 00:16:58,267 --> 00:16:59,267 What's that, sir? 298 00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:01,183 A great big bushy beard. 299 00:17:01,270 --> 00:17:03,306 Come on, let's have a mosey around. 300 00:17:05,650 --> 00:17:06,981 Locker room. 301 00:17:08,402 --> 00:17:09,892 Riot room. 302 00:17:12,114 --> 00:17:13,570 Evidence room. 303 00:17:16,494 --> 00:17:20,578 Now, how about a trip to the andes? 304 00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:22,075 Detective sergeant Wainwright 305 00:17:22,166 --> 00:17:24,498 and detective constable Cartwright. 306 00:17:25,962 --> 00:17:27,498 Don't get up. 307 00:17:28,673 --> 00:17:31,335 I expect you're wondering why we call them the andes. 308 00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:33,173 They're both called Andrew? 309 00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:35,092 They said you were good. 310 00:17:35,179 --> 00:17:36,865 Also, because talking to them is an uphill struggle, 311 00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:38,220 isn't it, dad? 312 00:17:38,307 --> 00:17:39,307 Fuck off! 313 00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:40,430 Thank you, Danny. 314 00:17:46,357 --> 00:17:49,474 And this is where it all happens. 315 00:17:50,987 --> 00:17:53,103 That is sergeant Tony Fisher. 316 00:17:53,197 --> 00:17:54,528 PC Bob Walker. 317 00:17:55,992 --> 00:17:57,323 And that is Saxon. 318 00:17:57,868 --> 00:18:01,952 And this is one Doris Thatcher. 319 00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:03,100 She's our only policewoman. 320 00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:04,239 She's not a policewoman. P 321 00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:05,477 yeah, she is. I've seen her bra. 322 00:18:05,501 --> 00:18:06,536 She's a police officer. 323 00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:08,146 Being a woman has nothing to do with it. 324 00:18:08,170 --> 00:18:10,206 Oh, I don't know. Comes in handy every so often. 325 00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:12,129 I could've given you the tour. 326 00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:14,047 I've been round the station a few times. 327 00:18:14,385 --> 00:18:15,875 And what's upstairs? 328 00:18:17,638 --> 00:18:20,220 Well, well, well, I see we have visitors. 329 00:18:20,308 --> 00:18:22,549 This is Tom Weaver. 330 00:18:22,977 --> 00:18:26,390 Civilian liaison with the neighborhood watch alliance. 331 00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:29,597 You'll find that we run a very tight ship here. 332 00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:36,358 From this command center I can see what the whole village is up to. 333 00:18:37,533 --> 00:18:40,991 I must say I was rather admiring your handiwork last night. 334 00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:43,660 It's a pity you didn't do the same to those bloody hoodies. 335 00:18:43,748 --> 00:18:46,364 Hanging around. Loitering. Sitting. 336 00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:48,871 Actually, I did notice some minor graffiti on the fountain. 337 00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:51,293 Graffiti? They've gotta be dealt with, frank. 338 00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:53,621 They're nippers, Tom. They'll come round. 339 00:18:53,716 --> 00:18:54,956 Which reminds me, 340 00:18:55,051 --> 00:18:58,384 our friend, the living statue, was here on Saturday. 341 00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:03,511 11:00, 12:00, 1:00, 2:00. 342 00:19:03,601 --> 00:19:06,434 If we don't come down hard on these clowns, 343 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:08,602 we are gonna be up to our balls in jugglers. 344 00:19:08,689 --> 00:19:10,771 We'll get right onto it, Tom. 345 00:19:13,069 --> 00:19:15,435 We like to let them think they run the place. 346 00:19:15,529 --> 00:19:17,269 Well, that's that. 347 00:19:17,365 --> 00:19:19,777 Unless there's anything you're unclear about? 348 00:19:19,867 --> 00:19:23,075 Yes, sir. Why is everybody eating chocolate cake? 349 00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:25,027 The black forest gateau is on Danny. 350 00:19:25,122 --> 00:19:27,408 As punishment for his little indiscretion. 351 00:19:28,668 --> 00:19:30,228 Sir, I don't think driving under the influence 352 00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:31,992 can be called a "little indiscretion.” 353 00:19:32,088 --> 00:19:35,251 No, the gateau is for misplacing his helmet the other week. 354 00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:39,300 Last night's incident will require something rather more serious. 355 00:19:39,387 --> 00:19:41,673 Good. Do you like ice-cream? 356 00:19:41,764 --> 00:19:43,504 I'm sorry, sir, I don't follow. 357 00:19:43,599 --> 00:19:45,089 Let's just say that we won't be short 358 00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:46,799 of chunky monkey for the next month. 359 00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:49,180 Dad. 360 00:19:49,271 --> 00:19:51,387 Now, since it's your first day and it's 11:30, 361 00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:53,063 I'd say that's lunch. 362 00:19:59,365 --> 00:20:03,984 So, what made you choose sandford then, sergeant angel? 363 00:20:04,078 --> 00:20:05,693 It wasn't actually my choice. 364 00:20:05,788 --> 00:20:08,029 Oh, right, right, wasn't your choice to come down here 365 00:20:08,124 --> 00:20:09,955 and tell me how to do my job. 366 00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:11,248 Our jobs. 367 00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:14,375 All: Yeah. 368 00:20:15,339 --> 00:20:18,251 Look, I can assure you it wasn't my intention to upset the apple cart. 369 00:20:18,342 --> 00:20:21,584 Yeah, 'cause we all sell apples round here, don't we? 370 00:20:21,679 --> 00:20:22,919 Your dad sells apples, Andy. 371 00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:24,503 And raspberries. 372 00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:27,180 I bet you can't wait to jump into sergeant popwell's grave. 373 00:20:27,268 --> 00:20:29,429 I'm not jumping into anyone's grave. 374 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,470 You got a mustache. 375 00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:34,100 I know. 376 00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:36,440 Why have you got your stab vest on? 377 00:20:36,527 --> 00:20:37,892 It's a requirement. 378 00:20:37,987 --> 00:20:42,276 In the city maybe. Nobody's gonna stab you in here, sergeant. 379 00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:44,566 Not a member of the public anyhow. 380 00:20:46,662 --> 00:20:48,277 Have you been stabbed, sergeant Fisher? 381 00:20:48,372 --> 00:20:49,407 No. 382 00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:50,908 Well, I have. 383 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,582 And I can assure you it is not in the least bit amusing. 384 00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:57,791 Have you seen a lot of action, sergeant angel? 385 00:20:57,882 --> 00:20:59,793 I've experienced my fair share, yes. 386 00:20:59,884 --> 00:21:01,124 Did you cook any fools? 387 00:21:01,218 --> 00:21:02,378 Excuse me? 388 00:21:02,470 --> 00:21:03,710 Did you shoot anybody? 389 00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:07,137 He shot a crack head with a kalashnikov. 390 00:21:07,683 --> 00:21:08,683 Where did you get that? 391 00:21:08,726 --> 00:21:11,433 The offender had the kalashnikov. 392 00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:12,600 Where'd he get that? 393 00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:15,896 You do know there are more guns in the country than there are in the city? 394 00:21:15,983 --> 00:21:19,020 Everybody and their mums is packing round here. 395 00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:20,653 Like who? 396 00:21:20,738 --> 00:21:21,818 Farmers. 397 00:21:21,906 --> 00:21:23,112 Who else? 398 00:21:23,199 --> 00:21:24,405 Farmers's mums. 399 00:21:28,704 --> 00:21:31,491 What's it like being stabbed? 400 00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:35,457 It was the single most painful experience of my life. 401 00:21:35,544 --> 00:21:37,910 What was the second most painful? 402 00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,960 You ever fired two guns whilst jumping through the air? 403 00:21:42,051 --> 00:21:43,166 No. 404 00:21:43,260 --> 00:21:44,696 You ever fired one gun whilst jumping through the air? 405 00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:45,835 No. 406 00:21:45,930 --> 00:21:47,073 Ever been in a high speed pursuit? 407 00:21:47,097 --> 00:21:48,212 Yes, I have. 408 00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:50,243 You ever fired a gun whilst in a high speed pursuit? 409 00:21:50,267 --> 00:21:51,382 No. 410 00:21:52,937 --> 00:21:57,226 Amanda on walkie-talkie: Annette, that sergeant angel's coming into your shop. 411 00:21:57,316 --> 00:21:58,977 Get a look at his arse. 412 00:21:59,652 --> 00:22:00,732 What about lethal weapon? 413 00:22:00,820 --> 00:22:01,855 No. 414 00:22:01,946 --> 00:22:02,964 You've seen die hard, though? 415 00:22:02,988 --> 00:22:04,023 No. 416 00:22:04,114 --> 00:22:05,650 Bad boys 11? No. 417 00:22:05,741 --> 00:22:07,447 You ain't seen bad boys 11? 418 00:22:11,455 --> 00:22:13,320 Hell of a day, huh? Yeah. 419 00:22:13,415 --> 00:22:14,996 Same again tomorrow? Yeah. 420 00:22:20,798 --> 00:22:24,040 Amanda paver, headmistress of sandford primary. 421 00:22:24,134 --> 00:22:25,544 How do you do, sergeant? 422 00:22:25,636 --> 00:22:27,672 Simon Skinner, I believe you've met. 423 00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:30,470 Oh, we're already firm friends. 424 00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:32,549 Oh, please, please, come with me, will you? 425 00:22:32,643 --> 00:22:34,508 This is Leslie tiller, 426 00:22:34,812 --> 00:22:38,930 whose horticultural expertise has helped put sandford on the map. 427 00:22:39,191 --> 00:22:40,226 She's ever so good. 428 00:22:40,317 --> 00:22:41,523 Oh, go on. 429 00:22:41,610 --> 00:22:44,022 This is James reaper, who owns brannigan farm. 430 00:22:44,113 --> 00:22:45,819 I hear you're quite the marksman. 431 00:22:45,906 --> 00:22:48,363 Perhaps you might like to join us for a shoot one day. 432 00:22:48,450 --> 00:22:49,636 Well, I haven't held a firearm 433 00:22:49,660 --> 00:22:50,991 for over two years, Mr. reaper. 434 00:22:51,078 --> 00:22:52,693 I'd quite like to keep it that way. 435 00:22:52,788 --> 00:22:54,388 You will be popular with the local birds. 436 00:22:55,124 --> 00:22:56,330 Birds. 437 00:22:57,084 --> 00:22:59,621 Nicholas, hello. Reverend shooter. 438 00:23:00,087 --> 00:23:03,375 I want to ask you, would you read a homily at Sunday service? 439 00:23:03,465 --> 00:23:05,547 That might be a little hypocritical of me, reverend. 440 00:23:05,634 --> 00:23:07,875 Oh, you're an atheist? 441 00:23:07,970 --> 00:23:09,426 No, I'm... I'm... 442 00:23:09,513 --> 00:23:10,824 I'm open to the concept of religion, 443 00:23:10,848 --> 00:23:12,554 I'm just not entirely convinced by it. 444 00:23:12,641 --> 00:23:13,721 You're an agnostic? 445 00:23:13,809 --> 00:23:15,265 I think I have a cream for that. 446 00:23:17,438 --> 00:23:20,555 Robin hatcher, our resident sawbones. 447 00:23:20,649 --> 00:23:23,561 Hopefully we won't see too much of each other over the coming months. 448 00:23:24,445 --> 00:23:26,401 Well, all that remains is to welcome you 449 00:23:26,488 --> 00:23:31,073 to the weekly meeting of the neighborhood watch alliance. 450 00:23:33,537 --> 00:23:36,495 Now, quick announcement before we begin. 451 00:23:36,874 --> 00:23:39,331 Janet barker has just given birth to twins. 452 00:23:40,628 --> 00:23:42,664 So, congratulations to her. 453 00:23:42,755 --> 00:23:45,041 Tom? Thanks, Joyce. 454 00:23:45,633 --> 00:23:46,713 Now. 455 00:23:47,468 --> 00:23:49,299 I am sure that all of you will have noticed 456 00:23:49,386 --> 00:23:52,423 the return of a blight to our streets. 457 00:23:52,514 --> 00:23:53,799 It's made all the more disturbing 458 00:23:53,891 --> 00:23:56,849 as the village of the year contest looms. 459 00:23:57,603 --> 00:24:02,723 I refer, of course, to the extremely irritating living statue. 460 00:24:08,072 --> 00:24:11,405 Angel: Police work is as much about preventing crime 461 00:24:11,492 --> 00:24:13,323 as it is about fighting crime. 462 00:24:13,410 --> 00:24:16,902 Most importantly, it is about procedural correctness 463 00:24:16,997 --> 00:24:20,410 in the execution of unquestionable moral authority. 464 00:24:21,543 --> 00:24:22,908 Any questions? 465 00:24:25,255 --> 00:24:26,495 Yes. 466 00:24:26,590 --> 00:24:29,297 Is it true that there is a place in a man's head 467 00:24:29,385 --> 00:24:31,501 that if you shoot it, it will blow up? 468 00:24:35,432 --> 00:24:36,888 Hi, hi, Tim messenger. 469 00:24:36,976 --> 00:24:39,262 Can I get a quick shot for the sandford citizen? 470 00:24:39,353 --> 00:24:40,513 Okay. 471 00:24:40,604 --> 00:24:42,720 How about you put the teacher in handcuffs? 472 00:24:42,815 --> 00:24:44,376 I don't think that gives off the right signals. 473 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:46,265 Too cheesy-pie. Okay. Gotcha. 474 00:24:46,694 --> 00:24:47,754 Give the little blonde kid your hat. 475 00:24:47,778 --> 00:24:48,893 I'd rather not. 476 00:24:48,988 --> 00:24:50,090 Wave your hitting stick about. 477 00:24:50,114 --> 00:24:51,149 No. 478 00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:52,480 Righty-ho-ho. 479 00:24:56,996 --> 00:24:59,988 Oh, can I have your autograph, please? 480 00:25:02,001 --> 00:25:03,491 For the breakfast. 481 00:25:03,585 --> 00:25:05,041 Oh, sorry. 482 00:25:10,009 --> 00:25:12,170 Hey, that weren't me. 483 00:25:13,429 --> 00:25:14,464 Morning, angle. 484 00:25:14,555 --> 00:25:16,011 Good morning, angle. 485 00:25:16,515 --> 00:25:17,515 Both: Morning, angle. 486 00:25:17,599 --> 00:25:19,035 Eo es lilt lis ti yovg fo es ee ee is ce = == sis em === = mes ee ee cs = = sees =e eee ss a at he - somes AAA Sara sa ea pere - sea emm = == = ae ea es ea eee sets =.= eb er cei sea eel re re er ae ee a le 487 00:25:19,059 --> 00:25:20,924 staker: Morning. The swan's escaped. 488 00:25:21,020 --> 00:25:22,476 The swan's escaped? Yeah. 489 00:25:22,563 --> 00:25:24,770 Right. And where has the swan escaped from exactly? 490 00:25:24,857 --> 00:25:26,768 The castle. Oh, yeah? And who might you be? 491 00:25:26,859 --> 00:25:30,192 Mr. staker. Yeah, Mr. Peter LAN staker. 492 00:25:30,279 --> 00:25:33,362 P. I. Staker. Right. Piss taker. Come on! 493 00:25:33,532 --> 00:25:35,397 Yes, Mr. staker. We'll do everything we can. 494 00:25:35,492 --> 00:25:37,357 Can you describe it to me? 495 00:25:37,453 --> 00:25:39,318 It's about two foot tall. 496 00:25:39,413 --> 00:25:40,619 Long slender neck. 497 00:25:40,706 --> 00:25:41,866 Yeah. 498 00:25:41,957 --> 00:25:43,367 Kind of orange and black bill. 499 00:25:43,459 --> 00:25:44,824 Anything else? 500 00:25:45,878 --> 00:25:47,368 Well, it's a swan. 501 00:25:55,304 --> 00:25:56,635 That's just gonna scare it. 502 00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:04,385 No luck catching them swans then? 503 00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:06,812 It's just the one swan, actually. 504 00:26:09,568 --> 00:26:10,933 Want anything from the shop? 505 00:26:11,028 --> 00:26:13,189 You've just been to the shop. 506 00:26:13,781 --> 00:26:15,317 I was thinking of a different shop. 507 00:26:15,407 --> 00:26:17,989 Constable Butterman, this is not the time for personal errands. 508 00:26:18,077 --> 00:26:19,179 Well, there's nothing going on, is there? 509 00:26:19,203 --> 00:26:21,694 There is always something going on. 510 00:26:21,789 --> 00:26:23,529 You have to look closer, all right? 511 00:26:23,624 --> 00:26:25,535 What about this guy? 512 00:26:26,460 --> 00:26:27,745 Mr. treacher? Yeah. 513 00:26:27,836 --> 00:26:29,918 Why has he got that big coat on? 514 00:26:30,005 --> 00:26:31,495 He can't be cold. Why the extra layer? 515 00:26:31,590 --> 00:26:33,831 Maybe he's trying to hide something. 516 00:26:34,426 --> 00:26:35,882 Mr. treacher? 517 00:26:36,845 --> 00:26:38,176 Okay. What about this guy? 518 00:26:38,263 --> 00:26:40,720 Ask yourself, why has he got his hat pulled down like that? 519 00:26:40,808 --> 00:26:42,139 He's fuck ugly. 520 00:26:42,226 --> 00:26:44,091 Or he doesn't want you to see his face. 521 00:26:44,186 --> 00:26:46,222 Because he's fuck ugly. 522 00:26:46,647 --> 00:26:48,387 Okay, what's his story? 523 00:26:48,482 --> 00:26:49,938 Oh, that's lurch. Go on. 524 00:26:50,025 --> 00:26:51,294 He's a trolley boy at the local supermarket. 525 00:26:51,318 --> 00:26:52,318 Good. 526 00:26:52,402 --> 00:26:54,233 Real name, Michael Armstrong. 527 00:26:54,321 --> 00:26:55,465 Dad says he's got a child's mind. 528 00:26:55,489 --> 00:26:56,524 Okay. 529 00:26:56,615 --> 00:26:58,775 And lives up summer street with his mum and his sister. 530 00:26:58,826 --> 00:27:00,066 And are they as big as he is? 531 00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:01,160 Who? 532 00:27:01,245 --> 00:27:02,781 The mum and the sister. 533 00:27:02,871 --> 00:27:04,361 Same person. 534 00:27:05,749 --> 00:27:07,114 What shop were you thinking of? 535 00:27:29,106 --> 00:27:32,598 Tina on pa: Sergeant angel to the manager's office. 536 00:27:32,693 --> 00:27:35,776 Manager's office. Sergeant angel. 537 00:27:38,490 --> 00:27:42,529 Sergeant angel. Or is it angle? 538 00:27:44,371 --> 00:27:47,408 Mr. Skinner, a baby's sicked up in aisle six. 539 00:27:48,292 --> 00:27:50,874 Please excuse me. Michael! 540 00:27:50,961 --> 00:27:52,121 Yarp. 541 00:27:52,212 --> 00:27:53,918 Child vomit. Aisle six. Mop it up. 542 00:27:54,006 --> 00:27:55,667 Yarp. 543 00:27:55,757 --> 00:27:57,338 Mr. Skinner, is there a problem? 544 00:27:57,426 --> 00:27:58,962 No, no, no, no. 545 00:27:59,052 --> 00:28:00,713 I simply wanted to say how lovely it is 546 00:28:00,804 --> 00:28:03,295 to see you supporting your local store. 547 00:28:03,390 --> 00:28:04,630 Well, that's quite all right. 548 00:28:04,725 --> 00:28:08,968 All too many have defected to the big megamart in buford Abbey. 549 00:28:09,062 --> 00:28:13,522 May their heads be struck from their shoulders for such disloyalty. 550 00:28:13,609 --> 00:28:16,646 Yes, well, I am on duty, so if you'll excuse me. 551 00:28:16,737 --> 00:28:20,229 Of course. I simply spied you loitering in organic produce 552 00:28:20,324 --> 00:28:22,940 and assumed you had time on your hands. 553 00:28:26,413 --> 00:28:28,825 Well, maybe I'm not the one you should be keeping an eye on. 554 00:28:29,291 --> 00:28:32,158 That's the fridge magnate. His name's George merchant. 555 00:28:32,252 --> 00:28:34,208 Made a fortune in kitchen goods. 556 00:28:34,296 --> 00:28:36,503 Built that monstrosity on Norris Avenue. 557 00:28:37,299 --> 00:28:39,711 Actually, I wasn't talking about him. 558 00:28:40,427 --> 00:28:42,884 I was talking about him. 559 00:28:42,971 --> 00:28:44,177 Ah. 560 00:28:44,264 --> 00:28:45,720 Excuse me. 561 00:28:48,852 --> 00:28:50,183 Excuse me. 562 00:29:02,449 --> 00:29:05,532 "Meet the cop that can't be stopped.” 563 00:29:22,552 --> 00:29:23,792 Man: Tosser! 564 00:29:25,889 --> 00:29:27,379 Trouble in the high street. 565 00:29:27,474 --> 00:29:29,135 Sergeant angel's having a spot of bother. 566 00:29:29,226 --> 00:29:30,432 Roger that. 567 00:29:40,821 --> 00:29:42,106 Man: Morning, sergeant. 568 00:29:49,454 --> 00:29:50,739 You mothers. 569 00:29:54,584 --> 00:29:57,075 Let's cut through here. Head him off. 570 00:29:57,796 --> 00:29:59,206 Through the gardens? 571 00:29:59,298 --> 00:30:00,378 What's the matter, Danny? 572 00:30:00,465 --> 00:30:01,921 You never taken a shortcut before. 573 00:30:46,178 --> 00:30:47,964 Hey, give me that! 574 00:30:54,269 --> 00:30:55,330 "You do not have to say anything, 575 00:30:55,354 --> 00:30:56,497 "however it may harm your defense 576 00:30:56,521 --> 00:30:57,790 "if you fail to mention when questioned 577 00:30:57,814 --> 00:30:59,292 "something you later rely on in court, 578 00:30:59,316 --> 00:31:01,398 "anything you do say can be given in evidence." 579 00:31:01,485 --> 00:31:03,146 Hi, Danny. All right, Pete? 580 00:31:03,236 --> 00:31:04,351 Do you know this man? 581 00:31:04,488 --> 00:31:06,215 Yeah, he's auntie Jackie's sister's brother's boy. 582 00:31:06,239 --> 00:31:08,176 And it didn't occur to you to mention this before? 583 00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:09,440 Couldn't see his face, could 1? 584 00:31:09,493 --> 00:31:11,029 I'm not made of eyes. 585 00:31:21,671 --> 00:31:23,457 Impressive collar. 586 00:31:23,548 --> 00:31:26,085 Shame Mr. Skinner doesn't want to press charges. 587 00:31:26,176 --> 00:31:27,695 What do you mean, he doesn't wanna press charges? 588 00:31:27,719 --> 00:31:29,459 I'm simply suggesting that, you know, 589 00:31:29,554 --> 00:31:31,590 Peter be given a second chance 590 00:31:31,681 --> 00:31:34,593 before he becomes just another crime statistic. 591 00:31:34,684 --> 00:31:37,517 I'm sure he's going to learn a valuable lesson. 592 00:31:37,604 --> 00:31:40,220 Stealing biscuits is wrong? 593 00:31:40,315 --> 00:31:41,315 Correct. 594 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:42,480 Thanks. 595 00:31:42,567 --> 00:31:45,434 And yet we respond by not taking a single punitive measure? 596 00:31:45,529 --> 00:31:48,487 Well, that's the way the cookie crumbles. 597 00:31:48,573 --> 00:31:50,484 Like the biscuits, isn't it? 598 00:31:50,575 --> 00:31:51,655 Mr. Skinner... 599 00:31:51,743 --> 00:31:53,449 Is everything all right? 600 00:31:53,578 --> 00:31:55,318 Well, sir, 601 00:31:55,414 --> 00:31:58,622 Mr. Skinner feels it would be better not to prosecute an individual 602 00:31:58,708 --> 00:32:00,744 that has committed a blatant offense. 603 00:32:00,877 --> 00:32:02,287 Leave this with me. 604 00:32:02,379 --> 00:32:05,542 I'll make sure everyone gets their just deserts. 605 00:32:05,632 --> 00:32:07,543 Man: Oh, no! 606 00:32:10,387 --> 00:32:11,843 Twenty-seven. 607 00:32:11,930 --> 00:32:14,046 Have you ever seen point break? 608 00:32:14,141 --> 00:32:15,472 No. 609 00:32:15,559 --> 00:32:17,891 Amazing bit in point break where they jump over fences. 610 00:32:17,978 --> 00:32:19,889 Is there now? Twenty-nine. 611 00:32:19,980 --> 00:32:21,561 Patrick Swayze's just robbed this bank 612 00:32:21,648 --> 00:32:22,979 and Keanu Reeves is chasing him 613 00:32:23,066 --> 00:32:25,933 through people's gardens, and he goes to shoot Swayze but he can't, 614 00:32:26,069 --> 00:32:27,189 'cause he loves him so much, 615 00:32:27,279 --> 00:32:29,279 and he's firing his gun up in the air, he's like... 616 00:32:29,656 --> 00:32:30,691 Forty. 617 00:32:30,782 --> 00:32:32,902 Have you ever fired your gun up in the air and gone... 618 00:32:33,368 --> 00:32:35,649 No, I have not ever fired my gun up in the air and gone... 619 00:32:36,329 --> 00:32:37,785 Thirty. 620 00:32:37,914 --> 00:32:39,404 Sorry, I... I just... 621 00:32:39,499 --> 00:32:41,581 I just feel like I'm missing out sometimes. 622 00:32:41,668 --> 00:32:42,668 I wanna do what you do. 623 00:32:42,752 --> 00:32:44,663 You do, do what I do. 624 00:32:44,754 --> 00:32:46,607 What on earth do you think you're missing out on? 625 00:32:46,631 --> 00:32:50,089 Gun fights. Car chases. Proper action and shit. 626 00:32:50,177 --> 00:32:53,590 Police work is not about proper action or shit. 627 00:32:54,431 --> 00:32:55,796 Twenty-nine. 628 00:32:55,932 --> 00:32:57,285 If you had paid attention to me in school, 629 00:32:57,309 --> 00:33:00,472 you'd understand that it's not all about gun fights and car chases. 630 00:33:01,938 --> 00:33:03,269 Fire up the roof. 631 00:33:07,944 --> 00:33:09,605 That was brilliant. 632 00:33:12,324 --> 00:33:14,815 Was I going a tad fast, officer? 633 00:33:15,327 --> 00:33:17,409 Yes, you were, Mr. blower. 634 00:33:17,496 --> 00:33:20,738 Well, now, you see, we are staging a homage 635 00:33:20,832 --> 00:33:22,868 to William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet 636 00:33:22,959 --> 00:33:24,915 and I'm a little late for the dress rehearsal. 637 00:33:25,003 --> 00:33:28,040 I'm playing the eponymous hero, you see. 638 00:33:28,298 --> 00:33:29,959 Romeo not Juliet. 639 00:33:32,302 --> 00:33:33,542 What are you writing? 640 00:33:33,637 --> 00:33:34,968 Everything you're saying. 641 00:33:35,138 --> 00:33:36,503 I might need to refer to it later. 642 00:33:36,640 --> 00:33:40,679 Now, officer, I am a respected solicitor so there's no need fo... 643 00:33:40,894 --> 00:33:42,304 Just stop writing, will you? 644 00:33:42,395 --> 00:33:44,556 Look, I'm merely trying to explain 645 00:33:44,648 --> 00:33:47,606 why I might have exceeded the speed limit. 646 00:33:47,692 --> 00:33:50,479 You're playing the male lead in a homage to William Shakespeare's 647 00:33:50,570 --> 00:33:53,482 Romeo and Juliet and you're late for the dress rehearsal. 648 00:33:53,573 --> 00:33:56,440 You think this is sufficient reason to travel at 48 in a 30 zone? 649 00:33:56,535 --> 00:33:58,366 Well, I... to flout speed limits 650 00:33:58,495 --> 00:34:00,406 specifically put in place to save lives. 651 00:34:00,497 --> 00:34:02,453 Just, look, this is preposterous. 652 00:34:02,582 --> 00:34:03,947 "Preposterous.” 653 00:34:04,042 --> 00:34:06,374 Look, just stop writing! 654 00:34:06,503 --> 00:34:08,664 "Stop writi p writing.” 655 00:34:10,340 --> 00:34:14,379 Look, you're right, I apologize. 656 00:34:15,845 --> 00:34:16,960 See what I did there? 657 00:34:17,055 --> 00:34:18,135 You hypnotized him. 658 00:34:18,223 --> 00:34:19,633 No, I used this. 659 00:34:19,724 --> 00:34:22,244 This is the most important piece of equipment you will ever own. 660 00:34:22,352 --> 00:34:23,592 This notebook has saved my skin 661 00:34:23,645 --> 00:34:25,181 more times than I care to mention. 662 00:34:25,272 --> 00:34:26,874 You should think about using yours more often. 663 00:34:26,898 --> 00:34:27,933 I do use mine. 664 00:34:28,024 --> 00:34:29,024 Show me. 665 00:34:34,364 --> 00:34:35,524 That's just extraordinary. 666 00:34:35,615 --> 00:34:37,401 You should see the one on the other side. 667 00:34:43,540 --> 00:34:44,620 What are you up to tonight? 668 00:34:44,666 --> 00:34:46,497 I have to water my peace Lily. 669 00:34:46,585 --> 00:34:48,121 Thought you might wanna do something. 670 00:34:48,211 --> 00:34:49,542 What exactly were you thinking? 671 00:34:49,629 --> 00:34:51,335 Don't know. Pub? 672 00:34:51,423 --> 00:34:54,586 I don't think that's a good idea. Do you? 673 00:34:57,596 --> 00:34:59,086 Oil you two. 674 00:34:59,264 --> 00:35:03,633 A Mr. blower left you tickets for Romeo and Juliet tonight. 675 00:35:03,727 --> 00:35:05,092 Said it was by way of an apology. 676 00:35:05,186 --> 00:35:06,722 Yeah? Yeah. 677 00:35:07,147 --> 00:35:09,980 Well, we can't accept gifts from somebody we've officially rebuked. 678 00:35:10,066 --> 00:35:11,181 So... 679 00:35:11,651 --> 00:35:12,857 Yeah. 680 00:35:14,195 --> 00:35:15,776 Nicholas. Glad I caught you. 681 00:35:15,864 --> 00:35:19,607 Wondered if you wouldn't mind representing us at the am drams tonight. 682 00:35:19,701 --> 00:35:20,986 Yes, sir, of course. 683 00:35:21,077 --> 00:35:22,613 And there's a spare for Danny, too. 684 00:35:22,704 --> 00:35:26,117 Yeah! Hey, come on, it might be fun. 685 00:35:27,792 --> 00:35:31,705 A dateless bargain to engrossing death. 686 00:35:33,214 --> 00:35:36,502 Here's to my love. 687 00:35:43,391 --> 00:35:44,551 Now. 688 00:35:49,356 --> 00:35:52,894 Poison? I'll kiss thy lips. 689 00:35:53,818 --> 00:35:56,901 Haply some poison doth yet hang on them. 690 00:36:04,579 --> 00:36:05,694 Bang! Lc 691 00:36:24,599 --> 00:36:26,089 Sergeant angel, hi-hi. 692 00:36:26,184 --> 00:36:27,845 Quick word for the sandford citizen. 693 00:36:28,520 --> 00:36:29,805 It was very enjoyable. 694 00:36:29,896 --> 00:36:31,082 "Cop enjoys watching young lovers"? 695 00:36:31,106 --> 00:36:32,141 I don't think so. 696 00:36:32,232 --> 00:36:33,918 "Local Bobby gives thumbs up to teen suicide"? 697 00:36:33,942 --> 00:36:35,523 That's just grossly inappropriate. 698 00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:39,607 You will try and spell his name correctly this time, won't you, Timothy? 699 00:36:39,698 --> 00:36:42,155 Absolute tosh, wasn't it? 700 00:36:42,450 --> 00:36:43,815 And annoyingly, the understudies 701 00:36:43,910 --> 00:36:46,526 are actually professional actors. 702 00:36:46,705 --> 00:36:49,162 Greg over there was an extra in straw dogs 703 00:36:49,249 --> 00:36:51,129 and sheree portrayed a cadaver in prime suspect. 704 00:36:51,209 --> 00:36:53,370 Sergeant angel, you came? 705 00:36:53,461 --> 00:36:56,828 So thrilled you accepted my invitation. 706 00:36:56,923 --> 00:36:59,881 Well, our inspector requested we attend. So... 707 00:36:59,968 --> 00:37:03,552 Yeah, we can't accept gifts from someone we've officially rebuked so... 708 00:37:04,848 --> 00:37:06,179 Jog on. 709 00:37:06,850 --> 00:37:10,058 Congratulations to you and to Mrs. blower. 710 00:37:12,313 --> 00:37:14,269 Oh, this is not my wife. 711 00:37:14,357 --> 00:37:17,099 This is miss draper. My leading lady. 712 00:37:17,402 --> 00:37:19,768 Eve works in the local council, sergeant. 713 00:37:19,863 --> 00:37:21,899 Quite the lady in the know. 714 00:37:21,990 --> 00:37:23,275 I am not. 715 00:37:23,366 --> 00:37:24,947 Nonsense. 716 00:37:25,034 --> 00:37:27,616 I'm sure if we bashed your head in, 717 00:37:27,704 --> 00:37:30,741 all sorts of secrets would come tumbling out. 718 00:37:32,917 --> 00:37:37,206 Romeo, Romeo, a pint of bitter for Romeo? 719 00:37:37,297 --> 00:37:39,233 Thank you very much for coming, George. Excuse us. 720 00:37:39,257 --> 00:37:41,373 A pleasure, my liege. 721 00:37:41,468 --> 00:37:42,799 Eve's nice, ain't she? 722 00:37:42,886 --> 00:37:44,877 She certainly has a distinctive laugh. 723 00:37:44,971 --> 00:37:46,632 She was in my year at school. 724 00:37:46,723 --> 00:37:48,384 Always had a thing for her. 725 00:37:49,184 --> 00:37:51,140 She clearly has a thing for older men. 726 00:37:52,270 --> 00:37:54,556 What, with Martin blower? No way! 727 00:37:55,064 --> 00:37:57,726 We just sat through three hours of so-called acting, constable, 728 00:37:57,817 --> 00:38:00,559 their kiss was the only convincing moment in it. 729 00:38:00,653 --> 00:38:02,314 Hey, now you come to mention it, 730 00:38:02,405 --> 00:38:05,021 I too have reason to believe she favors the older gent. 731 00:38:05,116 --> 00:38:06,231 Really? How so? 732 00:38:06,326 --> 00:38:07,611 Marcus Carter's big brother said 733 00:38:07,702 --> 00:38:09,408 he'd fingered her up the duck pond. 734 00:38:12,916 --> 00:38:14,577 Oh, officers. 735 00:38:14,667 --> 00:38:18,285 Again let me extend my Sincere apologies for earlier. 736 00:38:18,379 --> 00:38:21,746 That's quite all right, Mr. blower. Drive safe. 737 00:38:26,971 --> 00:38:30,134 "Drive safe." Oh, my god. 738 00:38:30,225 --> 00:38:32,591 You know that's the bloke we done for speeding earlier. 739 00:38:32,685 --> 00:38:35,597 Yeah. Hopefully, that's the last we'll see of him. 740 00:38:47,951 --> 00:38:49,282 Who is it? 741 00:38:53,873 --> 00:38:54,988 We haven't got long. 742 00:38:56,960 --> 00:38:58,166 To us. 743 00:39:00,380 --> 00:39:01,620 Who is it? 744 00:39:13,518 --> 00:39:14,849 Yeah? 745 00:39:17,689 --> 00:39:19,600 Decaffeinated? Decaffeinated? 746 00:39:24,153 --> 00:39:27,236 Little Brian Libby found them, out on his paper round. 747 00:39:28,032 --> 00:39:30,865 Oh, he'll be having nightmares for a while. 748 00:39:31,327 --> 00:39:33,534 Must have hit the sign at some speed. 749 00:39:33,621 --> 00:39:35,236 Took the whole top off. 750 00:39:35,331 --> 00:39:37,162 I've had my top off in this lay-by. 751 00:39:37,250 --> 00:39:38,410 Tits. 752 00:39:38,501 --> 00:39:44,997 Most likely lost control, left the road there and then ended up here. 753 00:39:46,676 --> 00:39:51,010 So, what do we reckon? 754 00:39:51,848 --> 00:39:53,258 Sergeant angel? 755 00:39:53,850 --> 00:39:55,202 Well, we should get a proper cordon off, 756 00:39:55,226 --> 00:39:56,682 screen the remains from public view. 757 00:39:56,769 --> 00:39:58,539 Close down the road until the ambulance crew arrives, 758 00:39:58,563 --> 00:40:01,896 whereupon we should open a single Lane of traffic and ease congestion. 759 00:40:02,442 --> 00:40:03,773 Very good. 760 00:40:04,444 --> 00:40:05,524 What he said. 761 00:40:10,909 --> 00:40:11,944 What happened, Danny? 762 00:40:12,035 --> 00:40:13,035 Car accident. 763 00:40:13,119 --> 00:40:14,859 Nasty way to go. 764 00:40:15,705 --> 00:40:17,696 Constable, official vocab guidelines state 765 00:40:17,790 --> 00:40:19,685 we no longer refer to these incidents as "accidents," 766 00:40:19,709 --> 00:40:20,869 they're now “collisions.” 767 00:40:20,960 --> 00:40:22,040 Right. 768 00:40:22,128 --> 00:40:24,961 "For never was there a story of more woe. 769 00:40:25,048 --> 00:40:28,256 "Than this of Juliet and her Romeo.” 770 00:40:28,551 --> 00:40:29,666 Excuse me? 771 00:40:29,761 --> 00:40:32,218 Martin and Eve. Such a tragedy. 772 00:40:32,305 --> 00:40:33,886 Mr. Skinner, do you mind telling me 773 00:40:33,973 --> 00:40:36,180 how you know the identity of the persons involved? 774 00:40:36,267 --> 00:40:39,725 You know how it is. News travels fast. 775 00:40:41,064 --> 00:40:44,227 A love struck Romeo sings a streetsus serenade 776 00:40:44,734 --> 00:40:45,849 what happened, Danny? 777 00:40:45,944 --> 00:40:47,059 Traffic collision. 778 00:40:48,321 --> 00:40:50,232 Hey, why can't we say "accident" again? 779 00:40:50,323 --> 00:40:52,780 Because "accident" implies there's nobody to blame. 780 00:40:54,285 --> 00:40:55,695 Put a sock in it, town mouse. 781 00:40:55,787 --> 00:40:57,573 Yeah, you wanna be a big cop in a small town, 782 00:40:57,664 --> 00:40:59,529 fuck off up the model village. 783 00:40:59,624 --> 00:41:02,036 I'm just saying, things aren't always as simple as they look. 784 00:41:02,126 --> 00:41:03,957 Most times they are. 785 00:41:04,087 --> 00:41:06,794 Let's just wait till doctor hatcher comes back with something, 786 00:41:06,923 --> 00:41:08,403 before you go jumping the kalashnikov. 787 00:41:09,592 --> 00:41:12,738 All right, in the meantime, why don't you check out a few of Martin blower's clients? 788 00:41:12,762 --> 00:41:15,629 Martin blower represents damn near most of the village. 789 00:41:15,765 --> 00:41:17,326 Did you want us to go through the whole phone book? 790 00:41:17,350 --> 00:41:20,137 Yeah, or put a call into Aaron a. Aaronson, shall we? 791 00:41:20,269 --> 00:41:21,554 Please, don't be childish. 792 00:41:21,646 --> 00:41:22,998 At least consider interviewing the widow. 793 00:41:23,022 --> 00:41:25,167 Martin blower was clearly having an affair with Eve draper. 794 00:41:25,191 --> 00:41:28,604 Oh, and how did you establish that? 795 00:41:28,695 --> 00:41:31,437 'Cause we sat through three hours of so-called acting last night, 796 00:41:31,531 --> 00:41:33,943 and the kiss was the only convincing moment in it. 797 00:41:34,033 --> 00:41:36,115 All right, pipe down, big one. 798 00:41:36,202 --> 00:41:38,739 Here, what else you got, Crockett and tubby? 799 00:41:38,830 --> 00:41:39,830 Skid marks. 800 00:41:39,914 --> 00:41:41,308 Now who's being childish? 801 00:41:41,332 --> 00:41:43,163 There were no skid marks at the scene. 802 00:41:43,292 --> 00:41:44,311 Doesn't it seem a little strange 803 00:41:44,335 --> 00:41:46,215 that Martin blower would lose control of his car 804 00:41:46,295 --> 00:41:48,206 and not think to apply the brakes? 805 00:41:48,840 --> 00:41:50,192 If there were no skid marks it follows 806 00:41:50,216 --> 00:41:52,172 that for 300 yards both driver and passenger 807 00:41:52,260 --> 00:41:54,125 did nothing to prevent their fate. 808 00:41:54,220 --> 00:41:56,211 You don't have to be a detective to work that out! 809 00:41:56,305 --> 00:41:57,465 Yeah. 810 00:41:57,557 --> 00:41:59,047 Are you causing trouble? 811 00:41:59,142 --> 00:42:00,632 Yes, they are. 812 00:42:00,727 --> 00:42:03,935 Well, a spot of bother up at ellroy farm. 813 00:42:04,022 --> 00:42:07,514 Old Arthur webley's been clipping hedgerows that don't belong to him. 814 00:42:07,650 --> 00:42:09,311 Th n yi qq ~, 1! Y- that's it. Es, sir? 815 00:42:10,319 --> 00:42:11,650 Yes, sir. 816 00:42:17,410 --> 00:42:19,071 Why do we need the dog? 817 00:42:19,162 --> 00:42:20,743 It's not the dog we need. 818 00:42:28,504 --> 00:42:29,584 Right. 819 00:42:29,672 --> 00:42:30,787 What did he say? 820 00:42:36,679 --> 00:42:38,407 What did he say? He said, "an 'edge is an 'edge. 821 00:42:38,431 --> 00:42:40,075 "He only chopped it down 'cause it spoilt his view. 822 00:42:40,099 --> 00:42:41,509 "What's reaper moaning about?" 823 00:42:41,601 --> 00:42:42,681 Right. 824 00:42:42,769 --> 00:42:44,163 Look, I appreciate your position, Mr. webley, 825 00:42:44,187 --> 00:42:45,998 but you can't go around chopping down other people's hedges 826 00:42:46,022 --> 00:42:47,102 without permission. 827 00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:50,731 "Yes, I suppose.” 828 00:42:50,860 --> 00:42:51,940 Thank you. 829 00:42:52,695 --> 00:42:54,185 All right. 830 00:42:55,865 --> 00:42:58,698 Mr. webley, I trust you have a license for that firearm? 831 00:43:01,079 --> 00:43:02,694 He does for this one. 832 00:43:04,415 --> 00:43:05,871 What do you mean by "this one"? 833 00:43:19,472 --> 00:43:22,134 By the power of gray skull. 834 00:43:22,225 --> 00:43:24,181 Where on earth did you get these? 835 00:43:24,268 --> 00:43:26,179 Found them. He found them! 836 00:43:26,270 --> 00:43:28,352 And what is this? 837 00:43:28,439 --> 00:43:29,849 Sea mine. 838 00:43:29,941 --> 00:43:31,477 Sea mine. 839 00:43:31,734 --> 00:43:34,271 Well, Mr. webley, this is an extremely dangerous collection. 840 00:43:34,403 --> 00:43:35,923 It's a wonder nobody's been hurt before. 841 00:43:35,947 --> 00:43:37,938 No, it's just a lot of junk. 842 00:43:50,128 --> 00:43:52,244 Angel: Move, move, move! 843 00:44:13,192 --> 00:44:14,192 Turner: You what? 844 00:44:14,277 --> 00:44:16,063 No, apparently its been deactivated. Over. 845 00:44:16,154 --> 00:44:18,236 That's right, deactivated! 846 00:44:18,322 --> 00:44:20,233 It's not live. It looks live. 847 00:44:20,324 --> 00:44:21,439 All right. 848 00:44:44,473 --> 00:44:46,827 That was quite an impressive haul today, constable Butterman. 849 00:44:46,851 --> 00:44:50,264 Well, you know, I mean, maybe we should do something to celebrate. 850 00:44:50,354 --> 00:44:51,832 Unless you gotta water your peace Lily. 851 00:44:51,856 --> 00:44:53,167 What exactly did you have in mind? 852 00:44:53,191 --> 00:44:55,227 I don't know. Pub? 853 00:44:59,989 --> 00:45:02,571 Mary: Right you are, my love. 854 00:45:02,658 --> 00:45:04,740 Yes, sirs, what can I get you? 855 00:45:04,827 --> 00:45:06,408 Pint of lager, please, Roy. 856 00:45:06,495 --> 00:45:08,182 And what can I get you that isn't a cranberry juice? 857 00:45:08,206 --> 00:45:09,446 I don't really wanna get drunk. 858 00:45:09,498 --> 00:45:10,863 You can get a little drunk. 859 00:45:10,958 --> 00:45:11,958 Okay, I'll have one. 860 00:45:12,001 --> 00:45:13,616 Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. 861 00:45:14,003 --> 00:45:15,959 Mr. Porter, what's your wine selection? 862 00:45:16,047 --> 00:45:20,666 Oh, we got red or white. 863 00:45:21,886 --> 00:45:23,251 I'll have a pint of lager, please. 864 00:45:23,346 --> 00:45:25,007 Yeah, Roy. 865 00:45:30,144 --> 00:45:31,554 Any news from earlier? 866 00:45:31,646 --> 00:45:34,433 Yeah. CSI found nothing. 867 00:45:34,523 --> 00:45:36,730 Doctor hatcher reported no misadventure 868 00:45:36,817 --> 00:45:38,978 and Mrs. blower has four alibis. 869 00:45:39,070 --> 00:45:41,231 Now, come on, sergeant, 870 00:45:42,114 --> 00:45:45,026 it's not your job to investigate this incident, is it? 871 00:45:45,868 --> 00:45:46,983 Ils it? 872 00:45:47,078 --> 00:45:49,535 Both: No, it isn't. 873 00:45:52,083 --> 00:45:53,698 You don't switch off, do you? 874 00:45:53,793 --> 00:45:55,374 You sound like my ex. 875 00:45:56,003 --> 00:45:57,743 Well, you are always thinking away. 876 00:45:57,838 --> 00:45:59,499 It's what I do. 877 00:45:59,590 --> 00:46:01,626 Don't get me wrong. I think it's amazing. 878 00:46:01,717 --> 00:46:03,002 Really? 879 00:46:03,094 --> 00:46:05,710 I mean, what made you wanna be a policeman? 880 00:46:05,846 --> 00:46:06,881 Officer. 881 00:46:07,014 --> 00:46:09,551 What made you wanna be a policeman-officer? 882 00:46:12,103 --> 00:46:15,516 I don't remember a time when I didn't wanna be a police officer. 883 00:46:15,606 --> 00:46:19,394 Apart from the summer of 1979 when I wanted to be Kermit the frog. 884 00:46:22,446 --> 00:46:24,357 He was a sergeant in the met. 885 00:46:24,448 --> 00:46:27,360 He bought me a police pedal car when I was five. 886 00:46:27,451 --> 00:46:29,567 I rode round in it every second I was awake. 887 00:46:29,704 --> 00:46:33,037 Arresting kids twice my size for littering and spitting. 888 00:46:33,124 --> 00:46:36,207 I got beaten up a lot when I was young but it didn't stop me. 889 00:46:36,294 --> 00:46:38,205 I wanted to be like uncle Derek. 890 00:46:38,296 --> 00:46:39,416 He sounds like a good bloke. 891 00:46:39,463 --> 00:46:41,795 Actually, he was arrested for selling drugs to students. 892 00:46:41,924 --> 00:46:43,004 What a cunt. 893 00:46:43,092 --> 00:46:45,504 Probably bought the pedal car with the proceeds. 894 00:46:45,594 --> 00:46:47,505 Needless to say I never went near it again. 895 00:46:47,596 --> 00:46:48,881 I just let it rust. 896 00:46:48,973 --> 00:46:51,053 But I never forgot the clear sense of right and wrong 897 00:46:51,100 --> 00:46:53,091 that I felt at the wheel of that pedal car. 898 00:46:53,227 --> 00:46:55,809 I had to prove to myself that the law could be proper 899 00:46:55,938 --> 00:46:58,270 and righteous and for the good of humankind. 900 00:46:58,399 --> 00:47:01,983 It was from that moment, I was destined to be a police officer. 901 00:47:02,445 --> 00:47:03,480 Shame. 902 00:47:03,571 --> 00:47:04,651 How so? 903 00:47:04,739 --> 00:47:07,276 I think you would've made a great muppet. 904 00:47:10,911 --> 00:47:13,778 What about you? What made you wanna become a police officer? 905 00:47:14,123 --> 00:47:17,206 I don't know. Dad does it. 906 00:47:17,293 --> 00:47:19,705 I think after my mum died, it's what he wanted, you know, 907 00:47:19,795 --> 00:47:21,501 keep me close by. 908 00:47:21,589 --> 00:47:23,750 Do you mind if I ask how she died? 909 00:47:23,841 --> 00:47:25,581 Traffic collision. 910 00:47:26,385 --> 00:47:27,750 I'm I s orry 911 00:47:28,929 --> 00:47:31,136 never mind. Hey, watch this. 912 00:47:32,475 --> 00:47:33,635 Jesus Christ! 913 00:47:33,726 --> 00:47:34,886 Oh, my eye! 914 00:47:36,562 --> 00:47:37,722 Ta-da! 915 00:47:37,813 --> 00:47:39,644 Hey, come on, silly bollocks, get them in. 916 00:47:51,994 --> 00:47:53,359 177. 917 00:47:53,454 --> 00:47:54,739 Mr. Skinner. 918 00:47:54,830 --> 00:47:56,183 You know George merchant, don't you? 919 00:47:56,207 --> 00:47:57,413 Evening, officer. 920 00:47:57,500 --> 00:48:00,412 Yes, we were just discussing the accident. 921 00:48:00,503 --> 00:48:03,916 I'd come to know Martin and Eve very well of late. 922 00:48:04,006 --> 00:48:05,587 Such a loss. 923 00:48:05,674 --> 00:48:08,086 What say we drink to their demise? 924 00:48:08,177 --> 00:48:09,821 Shouldn't that be "drink to their memories"? 925 00:48:09,845 --> 00:48:12,086 Of course. Cheers. 926 00:48:12,181 --> 00:48:14,012 I must go to the little boys' room. 927 00:48:15,351 --> 00:48:16,431 George: I'm all right! 928 00:48:16,519 --> 00:48:18,134 “Little” being the operative word. 929 00:48:18,687 --> 00:48:21,303 Oh, he'll be in bits tomorrow. 930 00:48:30,116 --> 00:48:32,778 I think somebody needs to go home. 931 00:48:32,868 --> 00:48:34,529 I'm... I'm not that drunk, sir. 932 00:48:34,620 --> 00:48:36,611 Not you. Him. 933 00:48:38,707 --> 00:48:40,038 What? 934 00:48:41,335 --> 00:48:45,203 Hey, we did get a little drunk. Did you get it? 935 00:48:45,297 --> 00:48:48,004 'Cause he's... he's little and he's drunk. 936 00:48:49,844 --> 00:48:51,709 Oh, good grief. 937 00:48:52,054 --> 00:48:55,046 It's hardly in keeping with the village's rustic aesthetic, is it? 938 00:48:56,892 --> 00:48:58,132 How much do I owe you? 939 00:48:58,227 --> 00:48:59,387 Twenty quid. 940 00:48:59,520 --> 00:49:01,511 There you go. 941 00:49:02,022 --> 00:49:03,102 And there's your change. 942 00:49:03,190 --> 00:49:04,270 God bless you. 943 00:49:04,900 --> 00:49:06,140 Bye-bye. 944 00:49:09,196 --> 00:49:10,732 I'm all right. 945 00:49:12,825 --> 00:49:13,940 Oh, dear. 946 00:49:14,034 --> 00:49:15,865 I would not wanna be him in the morning. 947 00:49:26,755 --> 00:49:29,838 Well, this is me. 948 00:49:30,426 --> 00:49:34,169 Well, I shall see you in the morning. 949 00:49:34,263 --> 00:49:37,096 Unless you wanna come in for a cup of coffee? 950 00:49:37,224 --> 00:49:38,509 I don't drink coffee. 951 00:49:38,601 --> 00:49:39,841 Tea? 952 00:49:39,935 --> 00:49:42,017 No caffeine after midday. 953 00:49:42,771 --> 00:49:44,602 How about another beer? 954 00:49:52,364 --> 00:49:53,524 Oh, dear. 955 00:49:59,872 --> 00:50:01,362 When did you move in? 956 00:50:01,457 --> 00:50:03,197 About five years ago. 957 00:50:04,418 --> 00:50:05,703 You should get some house plants. 958 00:50:05,794 --> 00:50:07,125 Oh, yeah, yeah. 959 00:50:07,213 --> 00:50:10,046 Yeah. I've been tending my peace Lily for about three years now. 960 00:50:11,634 --> 00:50:15,172 It oxygenates the room, helps you think, relieves stress. 961 00:50:15,262 --> 00:50:17,093 Its needs are simple. 962 00:50:21,393 --> 00:50:24,556 Janine used to say I love my Lily more than I loved her. 963 00:50:24,647 --> 00:50:25,978 Is that why you split up? 964 00:50:26,065 --> 00:50:27,145 What? 965 00:50:27,816 --> 00:50:29,898 'Cause you did it with a plant? 966 00:50:29,985 --> 00:50:31,225 No, no, no. 967 00:50:31,320 --> 00:50:34,858 It was more about me being obsessed with the job. 968 00:50:35,157 --> 00:50:37,489 That's good though, right? 969 00:50:37,993 --> 00:50:39,449 Is it though? 970 00:50:39,537 --> 00:50:41,744 I did miss a few dinners. 971 00:50:41,830 --> 00:50:44,742 You know, parties, a birthday or two. 972 00:50:44,917 --> 00:50:46,077 Listen, mate, I... 973 00:50:46,168 --> 00:50:47,954 Her dad's funeral. 974 00:50:49,088 --> 00:50:51,329 I just wanna be good at what I do. 975 00:50:51,423 --> 00:50:53,539 You are good at what you do. 976 00:50:55,094 --> 00:50:59,428 You've just gotta learn to switch off that big old melon of yours. 977 00:51:01,475 --> 00:51:03,557 That's the whole problem, Danny. 978 00:51:06,939 --> 00:51:08,930 I don't think I know how. 979 00:51:09,858 --> 00:51:11,849 I can show you how. 980 00:51:17,866 --> 00:51:20,528 By the power of gray skull. 981 00:51:21,287 --> 00:51:23,699 Point break or bad boys 1? 982 00:51:23,789 --> 00:51:25,149 Which one do you think I'll prefer? 983 00:51:25,207 --> 00:51:27,323 No, I mean which one do you wanna watch first? 984 00:51:27,418 --> 00:51:28,624 You are pulling my leg? 985 00:52:09,668 --> 00:52:11,659 What did you think of that? 986 00:52:11,754 --> 00:52:14,541 Well, I won't argue that it was a no holds barred, 987 00:52:14,632 --> 00:52:17,669 adrenalin fuelled thrill ride but there's no way you could perpetrate 988 00:52:17,760 --> 00:52:19,125 that amount of carnage and mayhem 989 00:52:19,219 --> 00:52:22,006 and not incur a considerable amount of paperwork. 990 00:52:22,097 --> 00:52:23,428 That is nothing, man. 991 00:52:23,557 --> 00:52:25,218 This is about to go off. 992 00:52:41,283 --> 00:52:42,898 This shit just got real. 993 00:52:46,830 --> 00:52:48,570 Hatcher: Nasty way to go. 994 00:52:48,666 --> 00:52:52,659 I think our Mr. merchant tried to have a little fry up and left the gas on. 995 00:52:54,505 --> 00:52:57,668 Spends his whole life devoted to the refrigerator 996 00:52:57,925 --> 00:53:00,291 then gets killed by an oven. 997 00:53:01,303 --> 00:53:04,591 I told him several times, you shouldn't eat late at night. 998 00:53:04,682 --> 00:53:07,594 Oh, I don't know. I quite like a little midnight gobble. 999 00:53:07,685 --> 00:53:08,891 Cocks. 1000 00:53:08,977 --> 00:53:12,640 So, what do we reckon? Angel? 1001 00:53:13,982 --> 00:53:15,097 Help me. 1002 00:53:15,651 --> 00:53:17,061 Okay, we get a proper cordon up, 1003 00:53:17,152 --> 00:53:19,188 we let the fire crews finish their stuff, 1004 00:53:19,279 --> 00:53:22,021 and then we get forensics in to do a thorough sweep of the house. 1005 00:53:22,116 --> 00:53:24,823 Very good. What he said. 1006 00:53:24,910 --> 00:53:27,026 Sergeant angel, hi-hi. A quick word? 1007 00:53:27,121 --> 00:53:29,453 Mr. messenger, a statement will be issued shortly. 1008 00:53:29,540 --> 00:53:30,642 Actually, I just wanted to ask, 1009 00:53:30,666 --> 00:53:32,202 "what's your perfect Sunday?” 1010 00:53:32,292 --> 00:53:34,658 I'll deal with the press, sergeant. 1011 00:53:34,753 --> 00:53:39,247 Now, my perfect Sunday is a lovely long lie in... 1012 00:53:40,509 --> 00:53:45,128 Fire to destroy all you've done 1013 00:53:49,268 --> 00:53:50,548 man on radio: Like in the films. 1014 00:53:50,978 --> 00:53:53,685 Something like, something out of backdraft. 1015 00:53:55,524 --> 00:53:57,515 What are you thinking? Foul play? 1016 00:53:57,609 --> 00:53:59,190 Angel: Maybe. 1017 00:53:59,278 --> 00:54:02,862 We're just hoping to talk to the last people to see Mr. merchant alive. 1018 00:54:03,282 --> 00:54:05,773 Namely a sergeant knickerless asswipe 1019 00:54:05,868 --> 00:54:08,359 and a constable Fanny batterbum. 1020 00:54:08,454 --> 00:54:09,454 That's us. 1021 00:54:09,538 --> 00:54:11,369 Why is this such a big joke to you? 1022 00:54:11,457 --> 00:54:12,913 Three people have died in a week. 1023 00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:15,616 Oh, come on, doctor Sherlock, they were accidents. 1024 00:54:15,711 --> 00:54:17,201 People have accidents every day. 1025 00:54:17,296 --> 00:54:18,627 The victims knew each other. 1026 00:54:18,714 --> 00:54:20,204 Everyone knows everyone round here. 1027 00:54:20,299 --> 00:54:23,541 Yeah. If you didn't see anything suspicious, then who did? 1028 00:54:28,891 --> 00:54:30,802 It's a bit of a blind spot, I'm afraid. 1029 00:54:30,893 --> 00:54:33,134 We just catch the very edge of the explosion. 1030 00:54:33,228 --> 00:54:35,059 Nasty way to go. 1031 00:54:35,147 --> 00:54:36,432 There was something took my eye. 1032 00:54:36,523 --> 00:54:37,729 Really? What's that? 1033 00:54:38,567 --> 00:54:40,774 Sandford's most wanted. 1034 00:54:42,654 --> 00:54:45,020 There you go. It was the swan all along. 1035 00:54:45,115 --> 00:54:46,571 This is not funny, detective! 1036 00:54:46,658 --> 00:54:48,398 Oh, give over, miss marples. 1037 00:54:48,494 --> 00:54:50,906 Yeah, you do your job and we'll do ours, eh? 1038 00:54:50,996 --> 00:54:53,237 Yeah. Haven't you got a church fete to look after? 1039 00:54:53,332 --> 00:54:55,288 No, I have not! 1040 00:54:56,251 --> 00:54:57,411 Actually. 1041 00:54:58,420 --> 00:55:00,331 Reverend shooter: Testing. Testing. 1042 00:55:00,422 --> 00:55:03,459 Someone's in for a surprise at 3:00, ladies and gentlemen. 1043 00:55:03,884 --> 00:55:07,502 It's the raffle with a very special guest presenter. 1044 00:55:08,680 --> 00:55:10,420 Out in the country 1045 00:55:10,516 --> 00:55:14,429 far from all the sorts of noise of the city 1046 00:55:14,603 --> 00:55:17,094 there's a village green 1047 00:55:17,189 --> 00:55:21,057 it's been a long time since I last set eyes 1048 00:55:21,151 --> 00:55:23,267 on the church with a steeple 1049 00:55:23,362 --> 00:55:25,569 that's me after a couple of pints. 1050 00:55:25,739 --> 00:55:27,104 Skinner: Splat the rat. 1051 00:55:29,743 --> 00:55:31,483 Splat the rat. 1052 00:55:33,580 --> 00:55:35,616 Splat the rat. 1053 00:55:37,751 --> 00:55:39,287 Shark! 1054 00:55:41,129 --> 00:55:43,085 Seen any murderings, nicholarse? 1055 00:55:43,173 --> 00:55:45,789 Come on, boys. Leave sergeant angel alone, he's working. 1056 00:55:45,884 --> 00:55:49,342 Sorry, chief, won't waste any more police time. 1057 00:55:49,429 --> 00:55:50,635 Have a nice time. 1058 00:55:50,722 --> 00:55:53,134 Actually, Nicholas, you might as well take a break. 1059 00:55:53,225 --> 00:55:56,012 Hey, great. I've got something to show you. 1060 00:56:01,984 --> 00:56:03,224 This is a rifle range. 1061 00:56:03,318 --> 00:56:04,933 You'll be really good at it. 1062 00:56:05,028 --> 00:56:07,485 Feeling lucky, sergeant? 1063 00:56:08,323 --> 00:56:10,405 Three cans wins you the squeaky bunny, 1064 00:56:10,492 --> 00:56:12,949 five cans gets you the floppy lion. 1065 00:56:13,036 --> 00:56:15,152 Take out all the little people, 1066 00:56:15,247 --> 00:56:18,114 you get to waltz off with the cuddly monkey. 1067 00:56:19,251 --> 00:56:22,664 I thought I made it clear to you how I feel about firearms. 1068 00:56:22,754 --> 00:56:25,086 It's only an air rifle. 1069 00:56:25,382 --> 00:56:26,542 Sergeant. 1070 00:56:45,193 --> 00:56:46,899 Dear lord! 1071 00:56:48,280 --> 00:56:50,362 That was amazing. 1072 00:56:54,828 --> 00:56:56,284 Thank you, Danny. 1073 00:56:56,371 --> 00:56:57,736 I can't believe I shot someone. 1074 00:56:57,831 --> 00:56:59,287 He's a doctor, he can deal with it. 1075 00:56:59,374 --> 00:57:01,080 I never shot anyone before. 1076 00:57:01,168 --> 00:57:03,438 Danny, believe me, it's not something you ever get used to. 1077 00:57:03,462 --> 00:57:05,703 Yeah. Maybe we should go on the bouncy castle. 1078 00:57:05,797 --> 00:57:06,877 Take our minds off of it. 1079 00:57:06,965 --> 00:57:08,876 Sergeant angel, hi-hi. Mr. messenger. 1080 00:57:08,967 --> 00:57:11,583 I need to talk to you about George merchant. Alone. 1081 00:57:12,054 --> 00:57:14,295 Churchyard. 3:00. 1082 00:57:15,974 --> 00:57:17,089 What do you think he wants? 1083 00:57:17,184 --> 00:57:20,221 Reverend shooter: Would sergeant angel come to the stage, please? 1084 00:57:23,273 --> 00:57:27,232 Here to announce the winners is the newest addition to the sandford police force. 1085 00:57:27,319 --> 00:57:28,434 Service. 1086 00:57:28,528 --> 00:57:30,268 Sergeant Nicholas angel. 1087 00:57:32,824 --> 00:57:34,109 Wanker. 1088 00:57:35,410 --> 00:57:37,571 Hello. Hello. 1089 00:57:54,638 --> 00:57:59,257 The first name is Simon Skinner: 1090 00:58:02,270 --> 00:58:03,806 He's in the loo. 1091 00:58:04,564 --> 00:58:06,930 Too much of Joyce's lemonade, perhaps. 1092 00:58:29,297 --> 00:58:31,709 And the next name is... 1093 00:58:35,679 --> 00:58:37,294 Tim messenger. 1094 00:58:47,149 --> 00:58:49,060 Tim, your number's up. 1095 00:58:58,493 --> 00:59:00,154 Excuse me. Excuse me. 1096 00:59:02,664 --> 00:59:03,824 Hi-=-hi. 1097 00:59:08,336 --> 00:59:09,667 Oh, no! 1098 00:59:15,010 --> 00:59:16,125 Stand back, stand back! 1099 00:59:16,219 --> 00:59:17,880 There's been a terrible accident. 1100 00:59:18,013 --> 00:59:19,298 Accident? 1101 00:59:19,389 --> 00:59:20,674 Just an accident. 1102 00:59:21,349 --> 00:59:24,056 It's all right, it's all right. There's nothing to see. 1103 00:59:24,186 --> 00:59:28,020 Come on, everybody. It's all right. It's just an accident. 1104 00:59:36,698 --> 00:59:38,313 Frank: Nicholas, what is it? 1105 00:59:38,408 --> 00:59:40,194 Sir, I think all these deaths are linked. 1106 00:59:40,285 --> 00:59:42,446 I think Tim messenger was murdered. 1107 00:59:42,871 --> 00:59:44,452 Who could do something like this? 1108 00:59:44,539 --> 00:59:46,029 Maybe it was the swan. 1109 00:59:46,124 --> 00:59:47,644 Apparently, they can break a man's arm. 1110 00:59:47,709 --> 00:59:49,199 Or blow up a man's house. 1111 00:59:49,294 --> 00:59:50,294 Listen, you pair of... 1112 00:59:50,378 --> 00:59:52,243 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Nicholas. 1113 00:59:52,756 --> 00:59:55,088 Now, let me get this straight. 1114 00:59:56,093 --> 00:59:58,459 Are you saying that this is a erime scene? 1115 00:59:58,553 --> 01:00:00,134 Yes, sir, I am. 1116 01:00:00,222 --> 01:00:01,553 Very well. 1117 01:00:02,099 --> 01:00:03,179 Detectives. 1118 01:00:03,266 --> 01:00:04,911 Start interviewing everyone who was at the fete. 1119 01:00:04,935 --> 01:00:06,015 Oh, he's got shorts on. 1120 01:00:06,103 --> 01:00:07,218 Sergeant Fisher? What? 1121 01:00:07,312 --> 01:00:08,722 Secure the area. What? 1122 01:00:08,814 --> 01:00:10,020 PC Thatcher? Yes, love? 1123 01:00:10,107 --> 01:00:11,722 Get the CSI down here. 1124 01:00:11,817 --> 01:00:13,023 PC Walker? 1125 01:00:13,110 --> 01:00:15,396 Patrol the churchyard with Saxon. 1126 01:00:15,487 --> 01:00:18,729 Nicholas, Danny, you know what to do. 1127 01:00:24,996 --> 01:00:27,157 Do you really think this is murder? 1128 01:00:27,332 --> 01:00:28,976 I just don't think we should rule it out, that's all. 1129 01:00:29,000 --> 01:00:30,490 Yeah. I think you're right. 1130 01:00:30,585 --> 01:00:32,826 I think you're talking a load of old shit. 1131 01:00:33,588 --> 01:00:35,169 He thinks you're talking a load of shit. 1132 01:00:35,257 --> 01:00:36,793 Swings and roundabouts, isn't it? 1133 01:00:37,134 --> 01:00:38,419 Cartwright: Pain in the arse. 1134 01:00:38,635 --> 01:00:40,671 Did you find anything? Yeah. 1135 01:00:40,762 --> 01:00:42,657 I was extremely shocked when I looked at my watch 1136 01:00:42,681 --> 01:00:44,158 and discovered that I should be in the pub. 1137 01:00:44,182 --> 01:00:46,468 Did you go to his house? Did you read his articles? 1138 01:00:46,601 --> 01:00:47,745 If you wanna Wade through every copy 1139 01:00:47,769 --> 01:00:50,010 of the sandford bloody citizen, be our guest. 1140 01:00:50,105 --> 01:00:52,016 It's your job, isn't it? Detect! 1141 01:00:52,107 --> 01:00:54,189 This ain't the city, Mr. angel. 1142 01:00:54,276 --> 01:00:56,358 Not everyone's a murdering psychopath. 1143 01:00:56,528 --> 01:00:58,143 It's high time you realized that. 1144 01:00:58,238 --> 01:00:59,899 You and your monkey. 1145 01:01:03,285 --> 01:01:05,276 Did he mean me or that? 1146 01:01:06,955 --> 01:01:09,116 Oh, maybe we should go home. 1147 01:01:09,332 --> 01:01:10,367 What do you mean? 1148 01:01:10,458 --> 01:01:12,414 Well, there's nothing going on, is there? 1149 01:01:12,502 --> 01:01:14,188 Have you listened to anything that I've said? 1150 01:01:14,212 --> 01:01:15,327 What do you mean? 1151 01:01:15,463 --> 01:01:17,024 Is anything I've told you in the last two weeks 1152 01:01:17,048 --> 01:01:18,109 sunk into that thick skull of yours? 1153 01:01:18,133 --> 01:01:19,133 Yeah. 1154 01:01:19,217 --> 01:01:20,923 Has it? Like what? 1155 01:01:21,469 --> 01:01:23,389 You said I could be an amazing policeman-officer. 1156 01:01:23,471 --> 01:01:25,837 There's always something going on, Danny. 1157 01:01:25,974 --> 01:01:29,558 And you won't be an amazing police officer until you understand that. 1158 01:01:29,644 --> 01:01:32,010 Well, I remembered something else you said and all. 1159 01:01:32,147 --> 01:01:33,728 Oh, did you now? Yeah. 1160 01:01:33,815 --> 01:01:36,147 You don't know how to switch off! 1161 01:02:10,060 --> 01:02:11,829 Cartwright: Well, if you wanna Wade through every copy 1162 01:02:11,853 --> 01:02:14,185 of the sandford bloody citizen, be our guest. 1163 01:02:51,768 --> 01:02:53,053 Morning, constable. 1164 01:02:53,144 --> 01:02:54,384 All right? 1165 01:02:55,730 --> 01:02:57,595 Thanks for the monkey. 1166 01:02:58,441 --> 01:02:59,556 Yours, isn't it? 1167 01:02:59,651 --> 01:03:00,982 I won it for you. 1168 01:03:04,614 --> 01:03:06,570 Danny, I think I'm on to something. 1169 01:03:06,658 --> 01:03:07,818 Are you? Yes. 1170 01:03:07,909 --> 01:03:09,615 And I think with a little deliberation 1171 01:03:09,703 --> 01:03:12,285 we can figure out what links these deaths. 1172 01:03:12,747 --> 01:03:13,827 We? 1173 01:03:13,915 --> 01:03:16,122 Come on, partner. Let's go to work. 1174 01:03:17,252 --> 01:03:19,163 Oh, oh, sergeant angel? 1175 01:03:19,254 --> 01:03:22,121 Someone from London called for you. 1176 01:03:22,215 --> 01:03:23,921 Tell them I'll call them back. 1177 01:03:24,759 --> 01:03:25,839 Tim messenger. Go. 1178 01:03:25,927 --> 01:03:27,758 Editor and journalist at the sandford citizen. 1179 01:03:27,846 --> 01:03:29,131 Fondness for puns. Go on. 1180 01:03:29,264 --> 01:03:30,344 Terrible speller. Oh, yeah? 1181 01:03:30,432 --> 01:03:32,451 Nevertheless had uncovered important information about... 1182 01:03:32,475 --> 01:03:34,215 George merchant. Self-made millionaire. 1183 01:03:34,311 --> 01:03:36,518 Fancied himself as a property developer. 1184 01:03:36,604 --> 01:03:37,873 Said he had big plans for sandford. 1185 01:03:37,897 --> 01:03:39,353 Pissed on the floor in the crown. 1186 01:03:39,441 --> 01:03:41,641 But more importantly, was a good friend and client of... 1187 01:03:41,693 --> 01:03:43,433 Martin blower. Respected solicitor. 1188 01:03:43,528 --> 01:03:44,528 Affirmatron. 1189 01:03:44,612 --> 01:03:45,840 Leading light of the local drama society. 1190 01:03:45,864 --> 01:03:47,274 Bad actor. Undoubtedly. 1191 01:03:47,365 --> 01:03:48,901 Bad driver. Not necessarily. 1192 01:03:48,992 --> 01:03:50,653 Cheated on his missus. Most certainly. 1193 01:03:50,744 --> 01:03:52,700 And we both know who with. Eve draper. 1194 01:03:54,581 --> 01:03:55,616 True. 1195 01:03:55,707 --> 01:03:57,117 Favored older men. Fingered. 1196 01:03:57,208 --> 01:03:58,448 Worked at? Council. 1197 01:03:58,543 --> 01:03:59,658 More specifically? 1198 01:03:59,753 --> 01:04:01,273 Department of planning and development. 1199 01:04:01,338 --> 01:04:02,953 Where George merchant secured permission 1200 01:04:03,048 --> 01:04:05,414 to build his dubious mansion on Norris Avenue. 1201 01:04:05,508 --> 01:04:06,623 So... 1202 01:04:06,718 --> 01:04:07,918 Maybe they were all accidents. 1203 01:04:09,137 --> 01:04:10,798 People have accidents every day. 1204 01:04:12,140 --> 01:04:13,550 What are you two up to? 1205 01:04:13,641 --> 01:04:14,641 Nothing. 1206 01:04:14,726 --> 01:04:15,841 Well, look sharp. 1207 01:04:15,935 --> 01:04:17,330 There's been reports of a fire in the station. 1208 01:04:17,354 --> 01:04:18,685 What? 1209 01:04:18,772 --> 01:04:22,435 All: Happy birthday to you 1210 01:04:22,525 --> 01:04:26,734 happy birthday to you 1211 01:04:26,821 --> 01:04:28,652 Danny, why didn't you say something? 1212 01:04:28,740 --> 01:04:30,480 We were working, weren't we? 1213 01:04:32,869 --> 01:04:34,405 Hey, where are you going? 1214 01:04:34,496 --> 01:04:35,952 Personal errand. 1215 01:04:42,754 --> 01:04:44,164 Hello, miss tiller. 1216 01:04:44,255 --> 01:04:46,962 I was wondering, do you have any Japanese peace lilies? 1217 01:04:47,050 --> 01:04:48,460 Of course. 1218 01:04:49,219 --> 01:04:51,676 I was just about to pop off, actually. 1219 01:04:52,514 --> 01:04:54,800 I can never find my scissors. 1220 01:04:55,058 --> 01:04:57,265 Is this for someone special? 1221 01:04:57,519 --> 01:04:59,384 Yes. Yes, it is. 1222 01:05:01,439 --> 01:05:03,725 Are you going somewhere, miss tiller? 1223 01:05:03,817 --> 01:05:06,058 Yes. I'm moving away. 1224 01:05:07,195 --> 01:05:10,358 And why the move, if you don't mind me asking? 1225 01:05:10,448 --> 01:05:13,565 Well, just between you and I... 1226 01:05:14,035 --> 01:05:15,400 Yes? 1227 01:05:15,495 --> 01:05:16,951 You know that fella who blew up? 1228 01:05:17,038 --> 01:05:18,403 George merchant. 1229 01:05:18,498 --> 01:05:21,661 Well, George merchant, god rest him, wanted to buy this land, 1230 01:05:21,751 --> 01:05:25,335 so he sends round his legal fella, Martin blower, god rest him, 1231 01:05:25,422 --> 01:05:27,538 and I thought I might take them up on it. 1232 01:05:27,632 --> 01:05:29,748 I haven't really got that much family round here, 1233 01:05:29,843 --> 01:05:31,333 save for cousin sissy. 1234 01:05:31,428 --> 01:05:34,886 So I thought I might take them up on the offer and move to buford Abbey. 1235 01:05:34,973 --> 01:05:36,964 Would you like a card with this? 1236 01:05:37,142 --> 01:05:39,428 No, sorry, you were talking about the offer? 1237 01:05:39,519 --> 01:05:42,727 Well, it turns out that Martin blower, god rest him, 1238 01:05:42,814 --> 01:05:44,975 knew where the new bypass road is going 1239 01:05:45,066 --> 01:05:48,149 because he was knocking off Eve draper from the council, god rest her, 1240 01:05:48,236 --> 01:05:51,945 and then that reporter, god rest him, finds out about the route 1241 01:05:52,031 --> 01:05:54,147 and tells me this land's very valuable. 1242 01:05:54,242 --> 01:05:56,483 Ten times what George merchant and Martin blower, 1243 01:05:56,578 --> 01:05:58,318 god rest them, offered me. 1244 01:05:58,413 --> 01:05:59,823 So, with them having passed on, 1245 01:05:59,914 --> 01:06:01,404 I decided to sell it on myself 1246 01:06:01,499 --> 01:06:04,286 to some folks from the city that Martin, George and Eve, 1247 01:06:04,377 --> 01:06:06,413 god rest the lot of them, had been talking to. 1248 01:06:06,504 --> 01:06:09,337 Apparently, they want to build a big shopping center or something. 1249 01:06:09,424 --> 01:06:12,211 Of course, cousin sissy won't be too happy about that, 1250 01:06:12,302 --> 01:06:14,447 but as far as I'm concerned, cousin sissy can go and fuck... 1251 01:06:14,471 --> 01:06:17,463 Would you just excuse me, for just one second? 1252 01:06:32,322 --> 01:06:33,528 Stop! 1253 01:06:34,407 --> 01:06:36,022 In the name of the law! 1254 01:07:34,217 --> 01:07:36,208 Fisher: Hang about, hang about. 1255 01:07:37,053 --> 01:07:39,339 You're saying this wasn't an accident? 1256 01:07:40,682 --> 01:07:42,718 Leslie tiller was fucking murdered! 1257 01:07:42,809 --> 01:07:44,265 What, just like Tim messenger? Yes 1258 01:07:44,352 --> 01:07:45,512 and George merchant? Yes! 1259 01:07:45,603 --> 01:07:46,843 Cartwright: And Eve draper? Yes 1260 01:07:46,938 --> 01:07:48,553 and Martin blower? No, actually. 1261 01:07:48,648 --> 01:07:50,513 Really? 'Course he fucking was! 1262 01:07:50,608 --> 01:07:52,519 Thank you, Danny. 1263 01:07:52,610 --> 01:07:54,271 Oh, murder, murder, murder. 1264 01:07:54,362 --> 01:07:55,943 Change the fucking record. 1265 01:07:56,531 --> 01:07:57,691 Thank you, Andy. 1266 01:07:57,782 --> 01:07:59,488 Come on, sergeant, you've gotta accept 1267 01:07:59,576 --> 01:08:02,033 it was just another nasty accident, 1268 01:08:02,120 --> 01:08:03,200 what are you suggesting? 1269 01:08:03,288 --> 01:08:05,779 That Leslie tiller tripped and fell on her own shears? 1270 01:08:05,873 --> 01:08:08,330 Ben Fletcher fell on his pitchfork the other week. 1271 01:08:08,418 --> 01:08:09,874 Yeah, accidents happen all the time. 1272 01:08:09,961 --> 01:08:11,872 What makes you think it was murder? 1273 01:08:11,963 --> 01:08:13,419 Because I was there! 1274 01:08:13,506 --> 01:08:14,916 Cartwright: There's a point. 1275 01:08:15,008 --> 01:08:16,373 Why were you there? 1276 01:08:16,467 --> 01:08:18,128 I was buying constable Butterman 1277 01:08:18,219 --> 01:08:20,710 a Japanese peace Lily for his birthday. 1278 01:08:20,805 --> 01:08:23,387 What absolute horseshit. 1279 01:08:23,474 --> 01:08:25,430 I chased a suspect from the scene. 1280 01:08:25,518 --> 01:08:27,429 Innocent people don't run! 1281 01:08:27,520 --> 01:08:30,603 Here, maybe it was our old friend, the cactus thief. 1282 01:08:30,690 --> 01:08:33,397 Oh, yeah, he was a prickly customer, weren't he? 1283 01:08:34,235 --> 01:08:36,942 Am I going completely mad? 1284 01:08:39,073 --> 01:08:40,734 Maybe you are. 1285 01:08:42,660 --> 01:08:45,402 Maybe you did it. 1286 01:08:45,496 --> 01:08:48,829 Yeah, seeing as how you're such a big fan of murder. 1287 01:08:48,916 --> 01:08:50,326 What the... sergeant angel? 1288 01:08:50,418 --> 01:08:52,909 Yes! Sir. 1289 01:08:55,506 --> 01:08:58,373 Nicholas, Nicholas, Nicholas. 1290 01:08:58,468 --> 01:09:01,050 What am I going to do with you? 1291 01:09:01,137 --> 01:09:02,502 Sir, you have to understand... 1292 01:09:02,597 --> 01:09:05,634 No, you have to understand. 1293 01:09:06,684 --> 01:09:10,643 The boys here aren't used to the concepts you're bandying about. 1294 01:09:11,272 --> 01:09:13,763 The "m" word, Nicholas. 1295 01:09:13,858 --> 01:09:18,067 There hasn't been a recorded murder in sandford for 20 years. 1296 01:09:18,154 --> 01:09:19,985 But, sir, I'm certain. 1297 01:09:20,490 --> 01:09:23,732 And what's more, I know who did it. 1298 01:09:29,791 --> 01:09:31,702 Can I see the manager, please? 1299 01:09:37,215 --> 01:09:39,547 Mr. Skinner to the manager's office. 1300 01:09:39,634 --> 01:09:43,172 Manager's office. Mr. Skinner. 1301 01:09:43,888 --> 01:09:45,378 Sergeant angel. 1302 01:09:45,473 --> 01:09:47,338 And to what do I owe this pleasure? 1303 01:09:47,433 --> 01:09:49,193 Simon Skinner, I'm arresting you on suspicion 1304 01:09:49,227 --> 01:09:51,513 of the murder of Leslie tiller. 1305 01:09:51,604 --> 01:09:55,062 Leslie tiller's dead? How? 1306 01:09:55,191 --> 01:09:57,523 She tripped and fell on her own shears. 1307 01:09:57,610 --> 01:09:58,725 Owl 1308 01:09:59,153 --> 01:10:02,486 I'm also arresting you on suspicion of the murder of Tim messenger on may 1st, 1309 01:10:02,573 --> 01:10:04,188 of George merchant on April 29th 1310 01:10:04,283 --> 01:10:06,865 and of Eve draper and Martin blower on April 28th. 1311 01:10:06,953 --> 01:10:09,160 Why on earth would I do that, sergeant? 1312 01:10:09,247 --> 01:10:11,158 I'm glad you asked. 1313 01:10:12,709 --> 01:10:14,870 My suspicions were first aroused when you appeared 1314 01:10:14,961 --> 01:10:17,748 at the scene of the blower-draper death, on the outskirts of sandford, 1315 01:10:17,839 --> 01:10:21,673 despite the fact you live and work in the center of the village. 1316 01:10:22,885 --> 01:10:24,716 I couldn't help but recall your comments 1317 01:10:24,804 --> 01:10:27,216 at the theater on the previous evening. 1318 01:10:27,473 --> 01:10:30,431 When you not only indicated an awareness of the couple's affair 1319 01:10:30,518 --> 01:10:32,579 but also inferred that Eve's connections at the council 1320 01:10:32,603 --> 01:10:35,561 might make her privy to important information. 1321 01:10:35,648 --> 01:10:37,934 You even spoke of "bashing her head in." 1322 01:10:38,025 --> 01:10:41,643 Perhaps hoping you might discover the route of the proposed sandford bypass. 1323 01:10:41,738 --> 01:10:44,049 You were already suspicious that George merchant was buying up 1324 01:10:44,073 --> 01:10:46,359 a large area of land on the outskirts of sandford, 1325 01:10:46,451 --> 01:10:49,409 after an article Tim messenger wrote in the sandford citizen. 1326 01:10:49,495 --> 01:10:51,031 You see, the land merchant was buying 1327 01:10:51,122 --> 01:10:53,158 had little value in of itself but, 1328 01:10:53,249 --> 01:10:55,035 if it became accessible by road, 1329 01:10:55,126 --> 01:10:57,162 it would be a prime location for say, 1330 01:10:57,545 --> 01:10:59,206 a retail park. 1331 01:10:59,297 --> 01:11:01,288 Consumed with concern for your business 1332 01:11:01,382 --> 01:11:03,418 and potential disloyalty from fickle customers, 1333 01:11:03,509 --> 01:11:06,091 you yourself expressed a wish to behead. 1334 01:11:06,596 --> 01:11:09,258 Em atn om eran ses mene te ee et rt a esr etre rh a rf tl st sees I 1335 01:11:09,348 --> 01:11:11,259 staging the murders as accidents. 1336 01:11:11,350 --> 01:11:12,715 You used a vehicle removal truck 1337 01:11:12,810 --> 01:11:14,425 to stage the blower-draper death 1338 01:11:14,520 --> 01:11:16,431 and incinerated an old man in his own house. 1339 01:11:16,522 --> 01:11:19,730 Covering your tracks with the judicial application of bacon and beans. 1340 01:11:19,817 --> 01:11:22,775 However, there was a loose end. 1341 01:11:23,821 --> 01:11:25,277 Tim messenger. 1342 01:11:25,364 --> 01:11:27,525 Splattered before he could share with me 1343 01:11:27,617 --> 01:11:30,575 what he told Leslie tiller that very afternoon. 1344 01:11:30,661 --> 01:11:33,528 The true value of her land. 1345 01:11:33,915 --> 01:11:36,827 Upon discovering she was about to sell up to the developers, 1346 01:11:36,918 --> 01:11:39,751 you brutally murdered her with her own shears. 1347 01:11:39,837 --> 01:11:44,581 And made good your escape utilizing your impressive skills as a fun runner. 1348 01:11:51,057 --> 01:11:52,497 Very entertaining. But I rather think 1349 01:11:52,558 --> 01:11:54,844 you've been watching too many films. 1350 01:11:56,437 --> 01:11:57,517 He hasn't. 1351 01:11:57,605 --> 01:11:59,186 Why would I kill Leslie? 1352 01:11:59,273 --> 01:12:01,355 You clearly aren't aware that we're related. 1353 01:12:01,442 --> 01:12:04,024 Oh, but I am, "cousin sissy." 1354 01:12:05,530 --> 01:12:07,691 I'm afraid my nickname of sissy 1355 01:12:07,782 --> 01:12:09,864 is only a revelation to yourself. 1356 01:12:10,117 --> 01:12:13,530 My teenage years studying ballet are well known. 1357 01:12:13,621 --> 01:12:15,077 Yeah, sissy Skinner. 1358 01:12:15,164 --> 01:12:16,850 Se I a fe srr rant tees srr at eee sal eee ss esse le ee re ae 1359 01:12:16,874 --> 01:12:18,364 thank you, Andrews. 1360 01:12:18,459 --> 01:12:21,872 Now, despite my comments about "beheading" customers, 1361 01:12:21,963 --> 01:12:25,455 I personally relish the competition of another store. 1362 01:12:25,591 --> 01:12:29,209 Anything to energize my workforce. 1363 01:12:30,721 --> 01:12:32,257 And anyway, what makes you think 1364 01:12:32,348 --> 01:12:35,306 I could dislodge part of the church roof? 1365 01:12:35,434 --> 01:12:37,891 Or for that matter, stage a car crash? 1366 01:12:37,979 --> 01:12:41,312 It's a well known fact that the church roof is in dire need of repair. 1367 01:12:41,440 --> 01:12:43,556 And isn't it true that two of your own employees 1368 01:12:43,651 --> 01:12:46,142 operate the vehicle removal service for the council? 1369 01:12:46,237 --> 01:12:48,569 Sergeant, this is the 21st century. 1370 01:12:48,656 --> 01:12:51,568 Many people hold down several jobs. 1371 01:12:51,659 --> 01:12:55,402 I myself host a life drawing class at the village hall. 1372 01:12:55,496 --> 01:12:58,488 Tina here is a table dancer at flappers. 1373 01:12:58,833 --> 01:13:00,573 Nevertheless, you could have utilized 1374 01:13:00,668 --> 01:13:02,750 the vehicle removal truck for your own ends. 1375 01:13:02,837 --> 01:13:04,828 These accusations are quite meaningless, sergeant, 1376 01:13:04,964 --> 01:13:07,580 unless you can back them up with hard evidence. 1377 01:13:07,675 --> 01:13:10,257 Well, you've got me there. 1378 01:13:10,344 --> 01:13:12,335 I'd need something conclusive. 1379 01:13:12,430 --> 01:13:14,591 Something that placed you at the scene of the crime. 1380 01:13:14,682 --> 01:13:16,013 Perhaps a wound you sustained 1381 01:13:16,100 --> 01:13:18,682 on a piece of broken glass this very evening. 1382 01:13:20,354 --> 01:13:22,015 This very evening. 1383 01:13:23,274 --> 01:13:26,516 Sergeant, this is beginning to get embarrassing. 1384 01:13:26,652 --> 01:13:29,815 How could I possibly be in several places at once? 1385 01:13:32,116 --> 01:13:36,780 I'm sure the store's security footage will absolve me. 1386 01:13:37,496 --> 01:13:40,158 Do feel free to spool through. 1387 01:13:57,600 --> 01:13:58,680 I can handle this, Danny. 1388 01:13:58,768 --> 01:14:02,056 You might as well go back and just enjoy the rest of your birthday. 1389 01:14:02,146 --> 01:14:03,431 Did you really get me that plant? 1390 01:14:03,522 --> 01:14:04,728 Yes, I did. 1391 01:14:04,815 --> 01:14:08,273 But it's been impounded as evidence. 1392 01:14:08,361 --> 01:14:12,980 Well, I mean, maybe dad will still let me water it, eh? 1393 01:14:13,074 --> 01:14:14,234 Yeah. 1394 01:14:17,662 --> 01:14:19,072 Sergeant, I wanted you to know that 1395 01:14:19,163 --> 01:14:22,496 if I do indeed now own the land belonging to... 1396 01:14:24,251 --> 01:14:27,038 Belonging to Leslie, that I intend to turn it 1397 01:14:27,129 --> 01:14:30,087 into a memorial garden, in her honor. 1398 01:14:30,174 --> 01:14:34,759 Mr. Skinner, what you do with your land is of no concern of mine, 1399 01:14:37,556 --> 01:14:38,762 so jog on. 1400 01:14:39,642 --> 01:14:41,428 Michael, will you escort the sergeant 1401 01:14:41,519 --> 01:14:44,261 off the premises when he's quite finished? 1402 01:14:44,355 --> 01:14:45,891 Yarp. 1403 01:14:49,026 --> 01:14:52,109 I just can't believe Leslie's dead. 1404 01:14:52,196 --> 01:14:53,356 How did it happen? 1405 01:14:53,447 --> 01:14:55,779 She tripped and fell on her own shears. 1406 01:15:03,916 --> 01:15:06,123 Hey, that weren't me. 1407 01:15:14,176 --> 01:15:15,336 Hey, look. 1408 01:15:15,428 --> 01:15:18,135 Look, Mr. treacher's got his big coat on again. 1409 01:15:21,809 --> 01:15:24,175 You want anything from the shop? 1410 01:15:24,979 --> 01:15:26,219 Cornetto. 1411 01:15:28,774 --> 01:15:30,560 No luck catching them killers, then? 1412 01:15:30,651 --> 01:15:32,733 It's just the one killer, actually. 1413 01:15:36,365 --> 01:15:37,980 No luck catching them killers, then? 1414 01:15:38,075 --> 01:15:39,656 It's just the one killer, actually. 1415 01:15:39,744 --> 01:15:41,450 No luck catching them killers, then? 1416 01:15:41,537 --> 01:15:43,073 It's just the one killer, actually. 1417 01:15:43,164 --> 01:15:45,155 No luck catching them killers, then? 1418 01:15:45,249 --> 01:15:47,160 It's just the one killer, actually. 1419 01:15:47,251 --> 01:15:48,811 What's the matter? You got brain-freeze? 1420 01:15:48,836 --> 01:15:50,497 No, I got brainwave. 1421 01:15:50,588 --> 01:15:52,874 Get us back to the station, now! 1422 01:15:59,847 --> 01:16:01,553 It's more than one person. Come again? 1423 01:16:01,640 --> 01:16:02,880 It's more than one killer. 1424 01:16:02,975 --> 01:16:04,511 It was Skinner a minute ago. 1425 01:16:04,602 --> 01:16:05,746 Yeah, well, maybe it still is. 1426 01:16:05,770 --> 01:16:08,206 You know, maybe he's... maybe he's not alone. Maybe there are others. 1427 01:16:08,230 --> 01:16:11,188 Nicholas, you're an exceptional officer. 1428 01:16:11,275 --> 01:16:13,391 But I've seen this before. 1429 01:16:13,861 --> 01:16:16,443 Sergeant popwell. 1430 01:16:16,530 --> 01:16:19,363 It was exactly the same thing. 1431 01:16:19,450 --> 01:16:23,864 You've come from a city where there's danger round every corner, 1432 01:16:24,330 --> 01:16:26,867 and it's driven you round the bend. 1433 01:16:27,374 --> 01:16:28,659 Yes, sir. 1434 01:16:28,918 --> 01:16:32,376 Do yourself a favor. Sleep on it. 1435 01:16:32,463 --> 01:16:35,296 And if you still feel the same in the morning, 1436 01:16:35,382 --> 01:16:38,215 I give you my word, I'll get right on to it. 1437 01:16:42,556 --> 01:16:45,468 Hey. Hey, what's happening? What's going on? 1438 01:16:46,102 --> 01:16:48,058 Nothing, nothing. 1439 01:16:48,145 --> 01:16:50,056 I'm just gonna go back to the hotel. 1440 01:16:50,147 --> 01:16:52,103 I mean, do you want a lift? 1441 01:16:52,608 --> 01:16:55,315 No, no, I could do with a walk. 1442 01:17:59,091 --> 01:18:02,003 Hey, big one, playtime's over. 1443 01:18:06,390 --> 01:18:07,755 Skinner on walkie-talkie: Michael? 1444 01:18:08,642 --> 01:18:11,304 Michael? Are you there? 1445 01:18:11,979 --> 01:18:16,018 Michael? Is everything okay? 1446 01:18:18,694 --> 01:18:19,854 Yarp. 1447 01:18:19,945 --> 01:18:22,687 Sergeant angel's been taken care of? 1448 01:18:22,781 --> 01:18:23,896 Yarp. 1449 01:18:23,991 --> 01:18:26,448 He's not gonna get back up again? 1450 01:18:29,079 --> 01:18:30,364 Narp! 1451 01:18:31,624 --> 01:18:34,206 Good. Proceed to the castle. 1452 01:18:39,423 --> 01:18:41,163 Frank, this shit just got real. 1453 01:18:41,258 --> 01:18:42,748 Skinner just sent someone to kill me, 1454 01:18:42,843 --> 01:18:45,050 and, now, now he's gone somewhere, 1455 01:18:45,137 --> 01:18:46,489 up to the... To the castle, I think. 1456 01:18:46,513 --> 01:18:47,782 I'm gonna... I'm gonna go after him. 1457 01:18:47,806 --> 01:18:50,138 Okay? It's Nicholas, by the way. 1458 01:18:52,228 --> 01:18:53,718 Oh, my god. 1459 01:18:54,939 --> 01:18:56,895 What happened to your peace Lily? 1460 01:18:56,982 --> 01:18:59,223 Danny. Danny, just stay here, okay? 1461 01:18:59,318 --> 01:19:00,899 And watch him, and call your dad. 1462 01:19:00,986 --> 01:19:01,986 Tell him I was right. 1463 01:19:02,071 --> 01:19:03,071 What are you gonna do? 1464 01:19:03,155 --> 01:19:04,691 I'm gonna bust this thing wide open. 1465 01:19:04,782 --> 01:19:06,443 Nicholas, wait. 1466 01:19:07,868 --> 01:19:09,654 You might need this. 1467 01:19:10,454 --> 01:19:11,694 Thanks, partner. 1468 01:19:44,822 --> 01:19:48,235 Skinner: How could I possibly be in several places at once? 1469 01:19:48,325 --> 01:19:51,488 How could I possibly be in several places at once? 1470 01:19:51,578 --> 01:19:54,866 How could I possibly be in several places at once? 1471 01:19:56,000 --> 01:20:00,118 Joyce: I just can't believe Leslie's dead. How did it happen? 1472 01:20:00,212 --> 01:20:03,295 Weaver: You'll find that we run a very tight ship here. 1473 01:20:03,382 --> 01:20:05,277 Reverend shooter: Who could do something like this? 1474 01:20:05,301 --> 01:20:07,529 Hatcher: Seems like Mr. merchant tried to have a little fry up 1475 01:20:07,553 --> 01:20:08,668 and left the gas on. 1476 01:20:08,762 --> 01:20:10,093 Nasty way to go. 1477 01:20:10,180 --> 01:20:11,340 Amanda: What happened, Danny? 1478 01:20:11,390 --> 01:20:13,221 Annette: No luck catching them killers, then? 1479 01:20:13,309 --> 01:20:15,174 No luck catching them killers, then? 1480 01:20:15,269 --> 01:20:17,476 No luck catching them... 1481 01:20:20,941 --> 01:20:23,353 Now, quick announcement before we begin. 1482 01:20:23,444 --> 01:20:27,813 Janet barker has decided to call her boys Roger and Martin. 1483 01:20:27,906 --> 01:20:33,196 And the christening will be a week on Saturday and we're all invited. 1484 01:20:33,454 --> 01:20:34,454 Tom. 1485 01:20:34,538 --> 01:20:35,778 Thanks, Joyce. 1486 01:20:35,998 --> 01:20:39,115 Now, you'll all be delighted to hear 1487 01:20:39,209 --> 01:20:43,873 that the tenacious sergeant angel has been taken care of. 1488 01:20:43,964 --> 01:20:47,297 Joyce will discover the sergeant lying 1489 01:20:47,384 --> 01:20:49,545 on the wet floor of his bathroom, 1490 01:20:49,636 --> 01:20:53,879 having slipped and tragically broken his neck. 1491 01:20:53,974 --> 01:20:56,056 So, with the dispatch of the sergeant, 1492 01:20:56,143 --> 01:20:57,883 we will now be able to concentrate 1493 01:20:57,978 --> 01:21:00,219 on the eradication of our hoodie infestation. 1494 01:21:00,314 --> 01:21:01,394 Quite right. 1495 01:21:01,482 --> 01:21:04,895 After which, nothing will stand in our way. 1496 01:21:04,985 --> 01:21:07,897 Oh, I beg to differ, Mr. Weaver. 1497 01:21:07,988 --> 01:21:12,231 Well, well, well, I see we have visitors. 1498 01:21:12,576 --> 01:21:15,739 Sergeant Nicholas angel. Sandford police service. 1499 01:21:15,829 --> 01:21:18,571 My, he is tenacious, isn't he? 1500 01:21:18,665 --> 01:21:19,934 I'm arresting you under suspicion 1501 01:21:19,958 --> 01:21:21,494 of conspiracy to commit murder. 1502 01:21:21,627 --> 01:21:24,414 Oh, come, come, sergeant. 1503 01:21:24,505 --> 01:21:26,086 You should be ashamed. 1504 01:21:26,173 --> 01:21:27,913 Calling yourself a community that cares. 1505 01:21:28,008 --> 01:21:29,748 Oh, but we do care, Nicholas. 1506 01:21:29,843 --> 01:21:31,583 It's all about the greater good. 1507 01:21:31,678 --> 01:21:33,168 All: The greater good. 1508 01:21:33,263 --> 01:21:34,753 How can this be for the greater good? 1509 01:21:34,848 --> 01:21:36,338 All: The greater good. 1510 01:21:36,475 --> 01:21:38,661 You see, as much as I enjoyed your wild theories, sergeant, 1511 01:21:38,685 --> 01:21:40,346 the truth is far less complex. 1512 01:21:40,479 --> 01:21:42,435 Blower's fate was simply the result 1513 01:21:42,523 --> 01:21:45,606 of his being an appalling actor. 1514 01:21:47,194 --> 01:21:48,434 All: Quite appalling. 1515 01:21:48,529 --> 01:21:50,269 You murdered him for that? 1516 01:21:51,365 --> 01:21:52,592 Well, he murdered bill Shakespeare. 1517 01:21:52,616 --> 01:21:53,776 What? 1518 01:21:53,867 --> 01:21:57,359 The dramatic society is an important feather in our cap. 1519 01:21:57,704 --> 01:21:59,182 Hatcher: Couldn't let blower jeopardize that. 1520 01:21:59,206 --> 01:22:01,518 Not when we had two semi-professionals waiting in the wings. 1521 01:22:01,542 --> 01:22:04,124 Let's not forget that Greg was an extra in straw dogs. 1522 01:22:04,211 --> 01:22:06,122 And sheree played a cadaver in prime suspect. 1523 01:22:06,213 --> 01:22:07,623 Yes, I know! 1524 01:22:07,714 --> 01:22:10,296 Martin was less concerned with the reputation of the village 1525 01:22:10,384 --> 01:22:13,626 than he was with his sordid affair with Eve draper. 1526 01:22:13,720 --> 01:22:15,301 And so Eve deserved to die too? 1527 01:22:15,389 --> 01:22:17,801 Well, she did have a very annoying laugh. 1528 01:22:17,891 --> 01:22:19,131 All: Annoying. 1529 01:22:19,226 --> 01:22:20,226 And, and George merchant? 1530 01:22:20,310 --> 01:22:22,050 He had an awful house. 1531 01:22:22,354 --> 01:22:23,389 All: Awful. 1532 01:22:23,522 --> 01:22:25,202 We begged him in vain to make his residence 1533 01:22:25,232 --> 01:22:27,814 more in keeping with the village's rustic aesthetic. 1534 01:22:28,902 --> 01:22:31,484 And what about Tim messenger? What was his crime? 1535 01:22:31,572 --> 01:22:36,236 Tim messenger's tenure as editor of the sandford citizen has been unbearable. 1536 01:22:36,368 --> 01:22:40,156 Our once great paper had become riddled with tabloid journalism. 1537 01:22:40,247 --> 01:22:42,238 Not to mention persistent errors. 1538 01:22:42,332 --> 01:22:43,788 He listed her age as 55. 1539 01:22:43,876 --> 01:22:45,582 When, actually, I'm 83. 1540 01:22:45,669 --> 01:22:47,159 Fifty-three. 1541 01:22:47,254 --> 01:22:48,982 What, what about Leslie tiller? One of your own? 1542 01:22:49,006 --> 01:22:51,497 Her horticultural expertise helped put sandford on the map. 1543 01:22:51,592 --> 01:22:53,583 Oh, she was ever so good. 1544 01:22:53,719 --> 01:22:55,880 Cousin Leslie was a terrible shame. 1545 01:22:56,180 --> 01:22:59,843 But it seemed she was set on moving away. 1546 01:22:59,933 --> 01:23:03,346 We couldn't have her sharing her green fingers with anybody else. 1547 01:23:03,437 --> 01:23:05,348 Not least those heathens at buford Abbey. 1548 01:23:05,439 --> 01:23:08,101 If we can't have her, no one can. 1549 01:23:08,233 --> 01:23:09,769 How can this be for the greater good? 1550 01:23:09,902 --> 01:23:11,938 All: The greater good. Shut it! 1551 01:23:12,029 --> 01:23:13,314 These people died for no reason. 1552 01:23:13,405 --> 01:23:15,145 No reason whatsoever! 1553 01:23:15,282 --> 01:23:17,773 Oh, I wouldn't say that. 1554 01:23:19,495 --> 01:23:20,905 Hello, Nicholas. 1555 01:23:21,955 --> 01:23:23,911 I was like you once. 1556 01:23:24,500 --> 01:23:27,958 I believed in the immutable word of the law. 1557 01:23:28,253 --> 01:23:32,087 That is until the night Mrs. Butterman was taken from me. 1558 01:23:32,966 --> 01:23:35,628 You see, no one loved sandford more than her. 1559 01:23:35,761 --> 01:23:37,251 She was head of the women's institute, 1560 01:23:37,346 --> 01:23:39,712 chair of the floral committee. 1561 01:23:39,806 --> 01:23:41,888 When they started the village of the year contest, 1562 01:23:41,975 --> 01:23:43,590 she worked round the clock. 1563 01:23:43,685 --> 01:23:45,676 I've never seen such dedication. 1564 01:23:47,022 --> 01:23:49,513 On the Eve of the adjudicator's arrival, 1565 01:23:49,608 --> 01:23:52,190 some travelers moved into Callahan park. 1566 01:23:53,153 --> 01:23:54,893 Before you could say, "gypsy scum,” 1567 01:23:54,988 --> 01:23:56,694 we were knee-deep in dog muck, 1568 01:23:56,823 --> 01:23:59,109 thieving kids and crusty jugglers. 1569 01:23:59,201 --> 01:24:00,941 All: Crusty jugglers. 1570 01:24:01,036 --> 01:24:04,153 We lost the title and Irene lost her mind. 1571 01:24:05,123 --> 01:24:09,241 She drove her Datsun cherry into sandford gorge. 1572 01:24:09,336 --> 01:24:14,501 From that moment on, I swore that I would do her proud. 1573 01:24:14,841 --> 01:24:19,335 And whatever the cost, we would make sandford great again. 1574 01:24:19,680 --> 01:24:21,511 Sir, this doesn't make any sense. 1575 01:24:21,640 --> 01:24:23,551 The adjudicators arrive tomorrow. 1576 01:24:23,642 --> 01:24:25,473 We had to get everything ready. 1577 01:24:25,561 --> 01:24:28,268 Are you saying this is all about winning the best village award? 1578 01:24:28,355 --> 01:24:30,471 This is the best village, Nicholas. 1579 01:24:30,566 --> 01:24:32,102 You've seen the people. Peop 1580 01:24:32,192 --> 01:24:34,649 they're happy, contented. 1581 01:24:34,736 --> 01:24:36,601 They're living in a dream world. 1582 01:24:36,697 --> 01:24:39,313 Sergeant popwell thought much the same as you. 1583 01:24:39,408 --> 01:24:41,444 I'm disappointed you can't see the bigger picture. 1584 01:24:41,535 --> 01:24:43,947 Well, I'm happy to disappoint you, sir. 1585 01:24:44,037 --> 01:24:45,848 And I'm afraid you're gonna have to come with me. 1586 01:24:45,872 --> 01:24:47,954 You are all gonna have to come with me. 1587 01:24:48,041 --> 01:24:52,125 No, Nicholas, I'm afraid it is you 1588 01:24:52,212 --> 01:24:54,954 who is going to have to come with us. 1589 01:25:03,015 --> 01:25:04,596 Danny, no. 1590 01:25:09,021 --> 01:25:10,477 Back off! Back off! 1591 01:25:10,564 --> 01:25:12,875 Or I swear to god, you'll be explaining how Danny tripped over 1592 01:25:12,899 --> 01:25:14,379 and accidentally cut off his own head. 1593 01:25:14,443 --> 01:25:16,604 Come on, Nicholas. You haven't got it in you. 1594 01:25:16,737 --> 01:25:18,068 I mean it! 1595 01:25:21,742 --> 01:25:22,948 Shit! 1596 01:25:37,758 --> 01:25:41,046 Frank: Gypsy scum. Travelers. 1597 01:25:41,136 --> 01:25:44,253 Thieving kids. Dog muck. 1598 01:25:46,475 --> 01:25:48,340 All: Crusty jugglers. 1599 01:25:48,602 --> 01:25:52,140 Crusty jugglers. Crusty jugglers. 1600 01:25:53,023 --> 01:25:54,354 Crusty jugglers. 1601 01:25:54,441 --> 01:25:58,059 Frank: There hasn't been a recorded murder in sandford for 20 years. 1602 01:25:58,153 --> 01:25:59,484 There's a reason we accommodate 1603 01:25:59,571 --> 01:26:01,107 a few of the younglings at the pub. 1604 01:26:01,198 --> 01:26:03,735 Spot of bother up at ellroy farm. 1605 01:26:03,825 --> 01:26:06,612 I'll make sure everyone gets their just deserts. 1606 01:26:11,792 --> 01:26:14,625 Weaver: If we don't come down hard on these clowns... 1607 01:26:14,711 --> 01:26:16,451 Frank: We'll get round to it. 1608 01:26:28,684 --> 01:26:29,719 Danny! 1609 01:27:04,845 --> 01:27:06,176 Ta-=da. 1610 01:27:06,346 --> 01:27:07,927 What are you doing? 1611 01:27:08,014 --> 01:27:09,550 Saving your skin. 1612 01:27:11,852 --> 01:27:12,932 This is murder! 1613 01:27:13,019 --> 01:27:14,509 It's not, it's ketchup. 1614 01:27:14,604 --> 01:27:17,346 I'm not talking about that, I'm talking about the others. 1615 01:27:17,441 --> 01:27:18,441 What others? 1616 01:27:18,525 --> 01:27:20,436 The others the nwa have murdered. 1617 01:27:20,527 --> 01:27:21,812 That's not true. It is! 1618 01:27:21,903 --> 01:27:24,064 Dad just said it was his special club, he... 1619 01:27:24,197 --> 01:27:26,092 I thought it was about rapping people on the knuckles 1620 01:27:26,116 --> 01:27:27,316 and sending them on their way. 1621 01:27:27,367 --> 01:27:29,323 There are skeletons back there! 1622 01:27:29,411 --> 01:27:31,051 I don't know nothing about no skelingtons. 1623 01:27:31,079 --> 01:27:32,265 What did you think was happening? 1624 01:27:32,289 --> 01:27:33,324 Not this! 1625 01:27:33,415 --> 01:27:34,530 It's f erank 1626 01:27:34,624 --> 01:27:36,831 he's appointed himself judge, jury and executioner. 1627 01:27:36,918 --> 01:27:38,658 He's not judge Judy and executioner. 1628 01:27:38,754 --> 01:27:40,164 He is! 1629 01:27:40,380 --> 01:27:41,916 You've gotta help me take him down. 1630 01:27:42,007 --> 01:27:43,543 I can't. 1631 01:27:44,551 --> 01:27:47,384 He's my dad. Take my car. 1632 01:27:48,472 --> 01:27:51,430 Go back to London. There's nothing you can do. 1633 01:27:51,558 --> 01:27:53,014 I can come back. 1634 01:27:53,101 --> 01:27:55,217 I can come back, and I can bring the blue fury 1635 01:27:55,312 --> 01:27:57,348 of the metropolitan police service with me. 1636 01:27:57,439 --> 01:28:00,476 They'll make it disappear. Who are they gonna believe? 1637 01:28:00,567 --> 01:28:03,274 My dad, or a loony London police officer. 1638 01:28:03,403 --> 01:28:04,893 But it won't be just me, will it? 1639 01:28:04,988 --> 01:28:08,230 We can do it together. You and me. Partners. 1640 01:28:08,450 --> 01:28:12,238 Forget it, Nicholas. It's sandford. 1641 01:29:03,463 --> 01:29:05,670 Is that everything? Sir? 1642 01:29:17,143 --> 01:29:19,759 Is there anything I can do for you? 1643 01:29:20,480 --> 01:29:21,640 No. 1644 01:29:24,526 --> 01:29:26,812 This is something I have to do myself. 1645 01:29:52,512 --> 01:29:56,346 Another beautiful day in god's country. 1646 01:30:04,024 --> 01:30:05,514 Danny? 1647 01:30:14,576 --> 01:30:15,816 It's... 1648 01:30:21,207 --> 01:30:22,287 Mum! 1649 01:30:33,678 --> 01:30:35,134 What you gonna do? 1650 01:30:35,221 --> 01:30:38,304 Just walk in and arrest the whole village? 1651 01:30:40,060 --> 01:30:41,266 Not exactly. 1652 01:31:14,260 --> 01:31:15,670 Oh, sergeant angel? 1653 01:31:15,762 --> 01:31:17,502 Someone from London called for you. 1654 01:31:25,605 --> 01:31:27,891 I'll tell them you'll ring them back. 1655 01:31:30,151 --> 01:31:31,186 Well, that's funny. 1656 01:31:31,277 --> 01:31:32,312 Man: What's that? 1657 01:31:32,779 --> 01:31:35,441 I didn't know we had a mounted division. 1658 01:31:35,532 --> 01:31:37,272 Nobody tells me nothing. 1659 01:31:53,675 --> 01:31:55,461 Wanna do something useful? 1660 01:32:04,936 --> 01:32:09,851 Amanda: Annette, that sergeant angel's back. Check out his horse. 1661 01:32:10,817 --> 01:32:12,773 Annette: Roger that! 1662 01:32:14,487 --> 01:32:15,772 It's... 1663 01:32:16,614 --> 01:32:17,820 Angel. 1664 01:33:28,812 --> 01:33:29,972 Morning. 1665 01:34:53,521 --> 01:34:55,477 That's what I'm talking about. 1666 01:35:10,413 --> 01:35:12,574 Still feel like you're missing out? 1667 01:35:39,275 --> 01:35:40,640 Fascist! 1668 01:35:57,293 --> 01:35:58,453 Hag! 1669 01:36:16,896 --> 01:36:20,639 Stop! Stop this, please! 1670 01:36:21,317 --> 01:36:24,684 Let us stop this mindless violence. 1671 01:36:25,989 --> 01:36:27,980 Nicholas, my son. 1672 01:36:29,075 --> 01:36:33,068 You may not be a man of god, but surely you're a man of peace. 1673 01:36:33,162 --> 01:36:35,949 I may not be a man of god, reverend, 1674 01:36:36,082 --> 01:36:38,915 but I know right, and I know wrong, 1675 01:36:39,585 --> 01:36:42,167 and I have the good grace to know which is which. 1676 01:36:42,255 --> 01:36:45,338 Oh, fuck off, grasshopper. 1677 01:36:46,926 --> 01:36:48,336 No! 1678 01:36:49,595 --> 01:36:51,335 Jesus Christ! 1679 01:36:51,848 --> 01:36:53,839 Nicholas! Nicholas! 1680 01:37:00,106 --> 01:37:01,937 I thought you was a goner. 1681 01:37:02,025 --> 01:37:03,731 Drop your weapons! 1682 01:37:04,360 --> 01:37:05,520 Dr. hatcher, no! 1683 01:37:05,611 --> 01:37:06,771 Shut up, Danny. 1684 01:37:07,739 --> 01:37:11,277 I brought you into this world, I think it's rather fitting 1685 01:37:11,367 --> 01:37:14,200 I should be the one to take you out of it. 1686 01:37:14,537 --> 01:37:18,371 You and your interfering little friend. 1687 01:37:18,791 --> 01:37:19,951 Now... 1688 01:37:24,380 --> 01:37:25,620 Drop them. 1689 01:37:42,148 --> 01:37:44,184 You're a doctor, deal with it. 1690 01:37:44,275 --> 01:37:46,266 Yeah, motherfucker. 1691 01:37:46,903 --> 01:37:47,903 Danny, let's roll. 1692 01:37:47,987 --> 01:37:49,193 What you thinking? 1693 01:37:51,240 --> 01:37:52,320 Pub? 1694 01:38:52,468 --> 01:38:54,379 Roy! 1695 01:38:55,138 --> 01:38:58,130 Somebody call the police! 1696 01:38:58,224 --> 01:38:59,384 Freeze! 1697 01:39:02,311 --> 01:39:05,144 Officers, arrest that man. 1698 01:39:05,565 --> 01:39:07,647 Danny, step away from the sergeant. 1699 01:39:07,733 --> 01:39:09,098 No, dad. 1700 01:39:09,193 --> 01:39:11,559 Danny, you'll do as you're told. 1701 01:39:11,696 --> 01:39:14,153 I'm not taking orders from you anymore. 1702 01:39:14,240 --> 01:39:16,572 Officers, arrest these men! 1703 01:39:16,659 --> 01:39:17,774 Wait, wait! 1704 01:39:17,869 --> 01:39:19,054 You can arrest us if you like. 1705 01:39:19,078 --> 01:39:20,389 You can throw us in prison and go back 1706 01:39:20,413 --> 01:39:21,723 to being blind, submissive slaves. 1707 01:39:21,747 --> 01:39:23,578 Or you can be real police officers, 1708 01:39:23,708 --> 01:39:25,915 and help us bring an end to this absurd story. 1709 01:39:26,002 --> 01:39:28,163 What the fuck is he on about? 1710 01:39:28,254 --> 01:39:29,414 Fuck are you on about? 1711 01:39:29,547 --> 01:39:32,163 Have you ever wondered why the crime rate in sandford is so low? 1712 01:39:32,258 --> 01:39:34,123 And yet the accident rate, it's so high? 1713 01:39:34,218 --> 01:39:36,004 No. Yeah. What? 1714 01:39:36,095 --> 01:39:38,006 You've been brainwashed, Tony. 1715 01:39:38,097 --> 01:39:41,339 Brainwashed into naivety by an old man with a murderous obsession. 1716 01:39:41,434 --> 01:39:42,765 This is ridiculous. 1717 01:39:42,852 --> 01:39:46,344 No, it's not, dad. It's very unridiculous. 1718 01:39:46,439 --> 01:39:49,431 And it's only now that I'm starting to realize how unridiculous it all is. 1719 01:39:49,567 --> 01:39:51,057 Silence, Danny! 1720 01:39:51,360 --> 01:39:52,395 Think of your mother. 1721 01:39:52,487 --> 01:39:54,273 Mum is dead, dad. 1722 01:39:55,531 --> 01:39:58,864 For the first time in my life, you know, I'm glad. 1723 01:39:58,951 --> 01:40:01,363 If she could see what you've become, 1724 01:40:01,454 --> 01:40:05,538 I think she'd probably kill herself all over again. 1725 01:40:05,625 --> 01:40:07,206 Sorry, I am completely lost. 1726 01:40:07,293 --> 01:40:08,954 Sandford is a lie, Doris. 1727 01:40:09,086 --> 01:40:12,453 For the last 20 years, the village has been controlled by frank and the nwa. 1728 01:40:12,590 --> 01:40:15,070 They've lulled everyone into thinking this is a perfect village 1729 01:40:15,134 --> 01:40:17,921 and killed anyone who's threatened to change that. 1730 01:40:25,561 --> 01:40:27,643 I reckon he's got something there. 1731 01:40:29,106 --> 01:40:32,064 He says, "he reckons you got something there." 1732 01:40:32,151 --> 01:40:33,391 I know. 1733 01:40:33,486 --> 01:40:36,728 You're not seriously gonna believe this man, are you? 1734 01:40:36,822 --> 01:40:39,939 Are you? He isn't even from round here. 1735 01:40:43,829 --> 01:40:48,118 Maybe it's time to give it up, sir. 1736 01:40:49,794 --> 01:40:52,331 You incompetent flatfoots! 1737 01:41:01,514 --> 01:41:04,176 Officer Walker, stay here with Saxon and hold everything down. 1738 01:41:04,267 --> 01:41:05,347 Fair enough. 1739 01:41:05,476 --> 01:41:07,512 Officers, let's go. 1740 01:41:08,479 --> 01:41:09,559 What about dad? 1741 01:41:09,647 --> 01:41:10,762 He'll come round again. 1742 01:41:11,148 --> 01:41:12,979 Want anything from the shop? 1743 01:41:30,710 --> 01:41:31,916 What you thinking? Well... 1744 01:41:32,044 --> 01:41:34,064 We should strike now, while we've got the element of surprise. 1745 01:41:34,088 --> 01:41:35,983 Longer we wait, more time they've got to mobilize. 1746 01:41:36,007 --> 01:41:37,401 I say we go in through the front entrance, 1747 01:41:37,425 --> 01:41:38,756 take the place aisle by aisle. 1748 01:41:38,884 --> 01:41:40,715 They won't be expecting that. 1749 01:41:41,345 --> 01:41:43,051 Very good. What he said. 1750 01:41:45,224 --> 01:41:48,432 My, my. Here come the fuzz. 1751 01:41:50,730 --> 01:41:52,220 Maybe they're not here. 1752 01:41:52,315 --> 01:41:53,475 Wait here. 1753 01:41:53,566 --> 01:41:54,646 Don't go in on your own, 1754 01:41:54,734 --> 01:41:57,100 don't worry, he knows what he's doing. 1755 01:42:00,072 --> 01:42:01,653 Okay. They're in. 1756 01:42:01,741 --> 01:42:04,858 You deal with the store. I'll deal with the trolley boy. 1757 01:42:14,211 --> 01:42:16,202 No, listen. Wait, 1758 01:42:16,297 --> 01:42:18,663 wait, listen to me. Listen, listen. 1759 01:42:18,883 --> 01:42:21,420 Is this what you really, really want? 1760 01:42:21,761 --> 01:42:22,876 Yarp. 1761 01:42:23,220 --> 01:42:24,426 Suit yourself. 1762 01:42:33,105 --> 01:42:34,811 Fisher: Go, go, go. 1763 01:42:37,234 --> 01:42:39,316 Oh, come on. 1764 01:42:51,624 --> 01:42:53,489 Andy! 1765 01:42:56,253 --> 01:42:59,245 It's all right, Andy. It's just bolognese! 1766 01:43:59,692 --> 01:44:01,603 How's lurch? He's in the freezer. 1767 01:44:01,694 --> 01:44:02,900 Did you say, "cool off"? 1768 01:44:02,987 --> 01:44:04,172 No, I didn't say anything, actually. 1769 01:44:04,196 --> 01:44:05,902 Shame. 1770 01:44:06,031 --> 01:44:07,509 There was a bit earlier on that you missed 1771 01:44:07,533 --> 01:44:09,177 when I distracted him with the cuddly monkey. 1772 01:44:09,201 --> 01:44:10,566 And then I said, "playtime's over," 1773 01:44:10,661 --> 01:44:11,981 and I hit him with the peace Lily. 1774 01:44:12,037 --> 01:44:14,119 You're off the fucking chain! 1775 01:44:14,206 --> 01:44:15,286 What's the situation? 1776 01:44:15,374 --> 01:44:17,740 Two blokes and a fuckload of cutlery. 1777 01:44:17,835 --> 01:44:19,200 What do you reckon? 1778 01:44:22,548 --> 01:44:23,754 Idea. 1779 01:44:47,448 --> 01:44:48,938 Good work, everyone. 1780 01:44:58,667 --> 01:44:59,667 Nice one, Doris. 1781 01:44:59,752 --> 01:45:01,663 Nothing like a bit of girl on girl. 1782 01:45:04,340 --> 01:45:06,422 Fruit attack! 1783 01:45:07,259 --> 01:45:08,695 Can you handle this, sergeant Fisher? 1784 01:45:08,719 --> 01:45:10,050 We're gonna go after the big boss. 1785 01:45:10,137 --> 01:45:12,093 We're on it, sergeant. 1786 01:45:12,515 --> 01:45:14,346 Danny, let's rock. Angel! 1787 01:45:14,433 --> 01:45:16,173 Don't go being a twat now. 1788 01:45:16,477 --> 01:45:18,763 I wouldn't give you the satisfaction. 1789 01:45:25,945 --> 01:45:27,481 We should get down there. 1790 01:45:27,571 --> 01:45:28,811 How? 1791 01:45:35,996 --> 01:45:37,452 Head them off? 1792 01:45:50,302 --> 01:45:51,382 I'll drive. 1793 01:45:51,470 --> 01:45:54,007 Shotgun! Punch that shit! 1794 01:46:37,850 --> 01:46:39,340 Bang! Bang! 1795 01:46:45,357 --> 01:46:46,517 Swan! 1796 01:47:06,045 --> 01:47:07,160 Swan! 1797 01:47:34,740 --> 01:47:38,904 Stay back! Or the ginger nut gets it! 1798 01:47:40,829 --> 01:47:43,411 You little fucker! 1799 01:48:19,201 --> 01:48:23,490 Get out of my village! 1800 01:48:29,461 --> 01:48:31,952 It's not your village anymore. 1801 01:48:48,814 --> 01:48:50,645 You did good, kid. Ta. 1802 01:48:50,733 --> 01:48:52,940 What's your name? Aaron a. Aaronson. 1803 01:48:53,360 --> 01:48:54,850 Sorry? 1804 01:48:56,822 --> 01:49:03,443 Angel! 1805 01:49:21,346 --> 01:49:22,677 It's over, Danny. 1806 01:49:24,099 --> 01:49:25,259 It's over. 1807 01:49:29,063 --> 01:49:34,353 This really hurts. 1808 01:49:34,443 --> 01:49:39,858 I'm going to need some ice-cream. 1809 01:49:39,948 --> 01:49:41,358 Yeah, well, don't worry. 1810 01:49:41,450 --> 01:49:43,130 There's plenty of ice-cream at the station. 1811 01:49:43,202 --> 01:49:44,362 Isn't that right, Danny? 1812 01:49:45,621 --> 01:49:46,736 Stay back! 1813 01:49:46,830 --> 01:49:48,661 Pack it in, frank, you silly bastard! 1814 01:49:48,749 --> 01:49:50,285 Now, now. 1815 01:49:50,626 --> 01:49:52,366 We don't want any more bloodshed. 1816 01:49:52,461 --> 01:49:55,203 Frank, this whole thing started because you lost somebody you loved. 1817 01:49:55,297 --> 01:49:57,275 Don't expect me to believe you'd let it end the same way. 1818 01:49:57,299 --> 01:49:59,836 I'll tell you how this is gonna end! 1819 01:50:42,427 --> 01:50:44,588 I feel like I should say something smart. 1820 01:50:44,680 --> 01:50:47,467 You don't have to say anything at all. 1821 01:50:59,361 --> 01:51:02,774 Satisfactory conclusion to the whole operation. 1822 01:51:02,865 --> 01:51:06,824 Now, my perfect Sunday would begin with... 1823 01:51:12,166 --> 01:51:13,685 Chief inspector: What do you say, Nicholas? 1824 01:51:13,709 --> 01:51:15,916 We... we... we have been trying to reach you for days. 1825 01:51:16,003 --> 01:51:17,539 Yeah, well, I've been kind of busy. 1826 01:51:17,629 --> 01:51:19,165 Sergeant: We need you back. 1827 01:51:19,256 --> 01:51:21,713 The figures have gone a little squiffy in your absence, 1828 01:51:21,800 --> 01:51:23,085 it has to be said. 1829 01:51:23,177 --> 01:51:24,292 Come back to London. 1830 01:51:24,386 --> 01:51:25,842 Sandford"s hardly a fitting place 1831 01:51:25,929 --> 01:51:27,635 for such an exceptional officer. 1832 01:51:27,723 --> 01:51:30,430 Yeah, well, the thing is, sir. 1833 01:51:31,351 --> 01:51:33,137 I kind of like it here. 1834 01:51:33,228 --> 01:51:36,595 Besides, we have to do a considerable amount of paperwork. 1835 01:52:02,841 --> 01:52:04,752 Fuck's sake, Nick, this is gonna take ages. 1836 01:52:04,843 --> 01:52:06,629 Yeah, it's gonna take all night. 1837 01:52:06,720 --> 01:52:09,336 Fisher: Well, good job we've got the manpower, Andy? 1838 01:52:09,431 --> 01:52:11,513 Well, official vocab guidelines state 1839 01:52:11,600 --> 01:52:13,682 that we say “staffing,” not "man power, "w 1840 01:52:13,769 --> 01:52:16,431 'cause "man power's” a bit sexist. 1841 01:52:18,815 --> 01:52:20,655 You don't mind a bit of manpower do you, Doris? 1842 01:52:20,734 --> 01:52:23,066 Oh, dirty bastard! 1843 01:52:24,821 --> 01:52:25,981 Andy! 1844 01:52:26,073 --> 01:52:28,109 You cheeky fucker! 1845 01:52:36,875 --> 01:52:38,786 You know what you are? 1846 01:52:39,628 --> 01:52:41,289 A bloody busybody! 1847 01:52:47,094 --> 01:52:49,380 No! 1848 01:53:03,860 --> 01:53:05,066 Oh, god, no! 1849 01:53:28,343 --> 01:53:29,583 Angel: Danny! 1850 01:53:32,097 --> 01:53:33,212 Danny! 1851 01:53:34,266 --> 01:53:35,426 Oh, god. 1852 01:53:35,559 --> 01:53:37,174 Hold on, Danny, just hold on. 1853 01:53:37,269 --> 01:53:40,011 Hold on, it's gonna be fine. It's gonna be fine. 1854 01:53:40,605 --> 01:53:43,392 Just hang on, hang on! 1855 01:53:43,859 --> 01:53:45,690 Everything's gonna be fine. 1856 01:53:46,945 --> 01:53:48,731 Everything's gonna be fine. 1857 01:53:49,197 --> 01:53:51,028 Everything's gonna be fine. 1858 01:53:51,783 --> 01:53:53,774 Everything's gonna be just fine. 1859 01:54:32,491 --> 01:54:33,571 Hope these are okay. 1860 01:54:36,661 --> 01:54:40,074 Yeah. They're lovely. 1861 01:54:49,633 --> 01:54:51,248 Doris: Any officers near the church? 1862 01:54:51,343 --> 01:54:52,753 Go ahead, Doris. 1863 01:54:52,844 --> 01:54:54,604 Chief, we've had a report of some hippy types 1864 01:54:54,679 --> 01:54:57,091 messing with the recycling bins at the supermarket. 1865 01:54:57,182 --> 01:54:58,922 Leave it with us. Righto. 1866 01:54:59,017 --> 01:55:03,135 Sergeant Butterman, little hand says it's time to rock and roll. 1867 01:55:03,355 --> 01:55:04,936 Bring the noise.