1 00:01:12,530 --> 00:01:17,576 The honourable Allen D. and the former Mrs Eastern. 2 00:01:17,702 --> 00:01:20,662 The honourable William and Mrs Breslau. 3 00:01:21,956 --> 00:01:26,585 The honourable Nelson and Mrs Winnie Mandela. 4 00:01:26,711 --> 00:01:32,341 Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States and Mrs Bush. 5 00:01:35,220 --> 00:01:39,306 Here's everybody on the list, Barb. Everybody's here. 6 00:01:39,516 --> 00:01:42,851 Hi, Peter. They let you out of the office early today. 7 00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:45,896 Jack, glad you could make it. 8 00:01:45,980 --> 00:01:49,525 Hi. Get rid of the beard. I don't like that, too liberal. 9 00:01:49,609 --> 00:01:52,027 Hi, Frank. Trudy. 10 00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:57,950 Hi, Peter. Glad you could make it. I like your suit. 11 00:01:58,284 --> 00:02:00,452 Everybody's here. Commissioner. 12 00:02:00,578 --> 00:02:03,914 Thank you very much. Dr Meinheimer, I'm glad you could make it. 13 00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:07,626 I'm looking forward to hearing your speech. 14 00:02:07,710 --> 00:02:12,840 I'm sure it's a wonderful, well thought-out piece of work. 15 00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:17,052 Ah, here she is. Dear. 16 00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:21,306 Have you met Dr Meinheimer formally? 17 00:02:23,226 --> 00:02:24,893 Thank you. 18 00:02:25,311 --> 00:02:28,689 Great Lady down! Repeat, Great Lady down! 19 00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:31,984 - What happened? - Easy, watch the table! 20 00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:33,527 Wait. 21 00:02:35,071 --> 00:02:38,532 - How are you, dear? - I'm okay, I'm fine. 22 00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:41,827 Good. 23 00:02:41,911 --> 00:02:43,912 Please be seated. 24 00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:47,249 Welcome. I'm glad you could all come. 25 00:02:47,458 --> 00:02:52,087 I'm pleased that we have so many distinguished guests tonight. 26 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:54,506 This week we are celebrating 27 00:02:54,591 --> 00:02:57,885 Law Enforcement Week all across the country. 28 00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:00,888 So I'd like to turn the proceedings over 29 00:03:00,972 --> 00:03:03,557 to our own Washington D.C. Police Commissioner, 30 00:03:03,641 --> 00:03:07,186 Captain Anabell Brumford. 31 00:03:08,271 --> 00:03:11,523 I would like to introduce a most distinguished American. 32 00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:17,279 This week he is being honoured for his 1,000th drug dealer killed. 33 00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:22,701 Please welcome Lieutenant Frank Drebin of Police Squad. 34 00:03:23,786 --> 00:03:27,831 In all honesty, the last two I backed over with my car. 35 00:03:28,958 --> 00:03:31,752 Luckily, they were drug dealers. 36 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:34,254 - Good. - Excellent! 37 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:38,759 Thank you, Commissioner Brumford. 38 00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:42,804 Now I'd like to call on my Chief of Staff, Mr John Sununu, 39 00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:45,474 to introduce some special guests. 40 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:49,853 Thank you. Mr President, tonight I'm extremely proud to welcome 41 00:03:49,979 --> 00:03:53,148 our guests from the nation's energy suppliers. 42 00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,317 First, representing the oil industry, 43 00:03:55,443 --> 00:03:59,988 head of the Society of Petroleum Industry Leaders, better known as SPIL, 44 00:04:00,156 --> 00:04:01,990 Mr Terence Baggett. 45 00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:07,454 From the coal industry, Chairman of the Society for More Coal Energy, 46 00:04:07,664 --> 00:04:10,582 or SMOKE, Mr Donald Fenzwick. 47 00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,000 Thank you. 48 00:04:12,126 --> 00:04:13,919 From the nuclear industry, 49 00:04:14,003 --> 00:04:18,632 President of the Key Atomic Benefits Office Of Mankind, KABOOM, 50 00:04:19,175 --> 00:04:21,385 Mr Arthur Dunwell. 51 00:04:21,469 --> 00:04:24,012 As you know, for the past three years, 52 00:04:24,138 --> 00:04:28,350 this administration has been trying to formulate a National Energy Policy 53 00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:31,687 that will have a lasting impact on the way we live 54 00:04:31,813 --> 00:04:33,981 for the next decade and beyond. 55 00:04:34,065 --> 00:04:37,234 To make sure that we choose the right path, 56 00:04:37,318 --> 00:04:42,030 the President has appointed as his top advisor in this area, 57 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:44,658 Dr Albert S. Meinheimer. 58 00:04:49,539 --> 00:04:53,208 As I'm sure you're aware, his reputation in this field is without peer, 59 00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:56,795 and Dr Meinheimer will present his recommendations 60 00:04:56,879 --> 00:05:00,716 to the Annual National Press Club Dinner this Tuesday evening. 61 00:05:05,096 --> 00:05:06,555 Mr President. 62 00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:12,561 I want all of you here to be the first to know 63 00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:19,401 that I've decided to base my administration's entire energy policy 64 00:05:19,527 --> 00:05:22,237 on Dr Meinheimer's recommendations. 65 00:05:23,197 --> 00:05:27,868 This issue is too important to be left to politicians or special interests to decide. 66 00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:32,831 We need an independent and informed source on which to base future actions, 67 00:05:32,915 --> 00:05:37,002 and Dr Meinheimer is the recognised expert in this field. 68 00:05:37,128 --> 00:05:42,007 Mr President, if I may say so, 69 00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:46,428 I do hope that Dr Meinheimer won't be influenced... 70 00:05:47,722 --> 00:05:51,350 Influenced by any of the so-called environmental groups. 71 00:05:51,476 --> 00:05:54,353 Well, we're all aware of Dr Meinheimer's reputation. 72 00:05:54,437 --> 00:05:58,315 He is best qualified to explain his research methods. 73 00:06:00,568 --> 00:06:03,779 - Dr Meinheimer. - Great Lady down again. 74 00:07:50,595 --> 00:07:53,096 This happens every fucking time when I go shopping! 75 00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:42,395 - Jane... - Dr Meinheimer. 76 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:47,275 - You're back early. - And you're here late. 77 00:08:47,443 --> 00:08:49,486 Surely, a lovely woman like you 78 00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:52,280 can think of something better to do on a Saturday night? 79 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:57,452 I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so blunt. 80 00:08:58,496 --> 00:09:01,456 It's all right, Doctor. It's okay. 81 00:09:02,458 --> 00:09:06,586 You're thinking about him again, aren't you? What was his name? 82 00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:09,506 - Frank? - Yes. 83 00:09:09,632 --> 00:09:11,841 You just can't forget about him? 84 00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:14,553 - Who? - Frank. 85 00:09:15,304 --> 00:09:16,513 Oh, yes! 86 00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:20,475 No, I can't. I... I try. 87 00:09:20,643 --> 00:09:25,188 It's just that when you've had that much man... 88 00:09:26,691 --> 00:09:29,067 But then, you wouldn't understand. 89 00:09:32,071 --> 00:09:36,283 Jane, you mustn't be so hard on yourself. 90 00:09:36,659 --> 00:09:39,661 You've done a wonderful job here at the Institute. 91 00:09:39,745 --> 00:09:43,164 You're the finest Director of Public Relations we've ever had. 92 00:09:43,666 --> 00:09:46,334 Thank you, Doctor, I try my best. 93 00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:50,297 But I see you here night after night past 10:00. 94 00:09:50,548 --> 00:09:56,428 You must forget about the past. Go out, see new people, enjoy yourself. 95 00:09:56,554 --> 00:09:59,180 There is someone I'm seeing, in fact just yesterday. 96 00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:01,850 I was telling him about the speech that you were preparing for the press... 97 00:10:01,934 --> 00:10:05,395 - Good evening. - Hello, Norm. 98 00:10:06,188 --> 00:10:09,399 I forgot. How was the White House dinner? 99 00:10:09,483 --> 00:10:14,321 Extraordinary. The President promised to implement my recommendations. 100 00:10:14,488 --> 00:10:18,450 Wonderful! Then you're going to deliver the speech you told me about? 101 00:10:18,534 --> 00:10:21,328 Every word of it. I would've given it tonight, 102 00:10:21,495 --> 00:10:25,165 but a guest there made such a ruckus that they wouldn't have heard me. 103 00:10:25,708 --> 00:10:29,586 Hey, Al! Ken! Look at this. 104 00:10:29,712 --> 00:10:32,464 I found this in the waste-basket. 105 00:10:34,508 --> 00:10:37,969 Hey, that's a pretty nice clock! 106 00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:41,139 I wonder why they threw it out. 107 00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:45,894 It's probably because it's four minutes too slow. Let me fix it. 108 00:10:47,063 --> 00:10:48,688 There. 109 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:57,864 My name is Sergeant Frank Drebin, Detective Lieutenant, Police Squad. 110 00:10:58,366 --> 00:11:02,619 I was getting my car washed when I heard the call come over the scanner. 111 00:11:02,703 --> 00:11:06,831 There had been a bombing and I was on my way to advise the D.C. Police 112 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:10,752 as part of the President's "Operation Scum Roundup". 113 00:11:11,128 --> 00:11:14,255 - Ready? - Yeah, got it. 114 00:11:14,423 --> 00:11:17,801 As far as police work is concerned, once in a while something comes up 115 00:11:17,885 --> 00:11:20,595 that nothing quite prepares you for. 116 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:24,808 Somehow, a demented madman, probably full of self-hate, 117 00:11:24,892 --> 00:11:29,896 and possibly a couple of months behind in his rent, finally snapped. 118 00:11:31,774 --> 00:11:35,235 - I'm glad you could make it. - I got here as quickly as I could. 119 00:11:35,319 --> 00:11:38,363 Congratulations, I understand that Edna's pregnant again. 120 00:11:38,447 --> 00:11:40,907 - Yes, and if I catch the guy who did it... - Captain. 121 00:11:40,991 --> 00:11:42,242 They've searched the building. 122 00:11:42,326 --> 00:11:45,036 No sign of a break-in, no money missing. 123 00:11:45,121 --> 00:11:47,622 This was one hell of an explosion. 124 00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:50,125 We're still trying to figure out what they used. 125 00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:53,128 - Any other victims? - You're standing on one right now. 126 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,839 - Oh, I see... - Get him out of here. 127 00:11:57,091 --> 00:12:02,220 - This one's a real mess. - Over here, Frank found another one. 128 00:12:02,304 --> 00:12:05,890 - Any witnesses, Ed? - Well, there's one. A woman. 129 00:12:06,058 --> 00:12:08,935 She saw a man leaving just before the explosion. 130 00:12:09,103 --> 00:12:13,106 - We should let Nordberg handle it. - No, I'd better do it while it's still fresh. 131 00:12:13,190 --> 00:12:15,692 Not now. She fainted dead away. 132 00:12:15,776 --> 00:12:19,320 She took a knock on the head. She looks pretty bad. 133 00:12:19,405 --> 00:12:21,281 - I'll handle it. - Sir... 134 00:12:21,365 --> 00:12:25,910 - Miss, I'd like to ask some questions. - Not that bad. 135 00:12:26,036 --> 00:12:29,414 She's being questioned by our sketch artist. 136 00:12:33,502 --> 00:12:35,670 I couldn't believe it was her. It was like a dream. 137 00:12:37,047 --> 00:12:40,884 But there she was, just like I remembered her. 138 00:12:40,968 --> 00:12:43,928 That delicately beautiful face 139 00:12:44,805 --> 00:12:48,850 and a body that could melt a cheese sandwich from across the room. 140 00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:54,564 And breasts that seem to say, "Hey, look at these!" 141 00:12:57,985 --> 00:13:00,612 She made you drop to your knees 142 00:13:00,696 --> 00:13:05,283 and thank God that you were a man. Yeah... 143 00:13:05,826 --> 00:13:10,622 She reminded me of my mother, all right. No doubt about it. 144 00:13:11,248 --> 00:13:16,127 Snap out of it. You're looking at her like she was your mother. 145 00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:28,348 - Frank. - Jane. I didn't know you lived here. 146 00:13:29,558 --> 00:13:31,226 I moved here two years ago. 147 00:13:33,562 --> 00:13:37,148 - How are the children? - We didn't have any children. 148 00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:39,067 Yes, of course. 149 00:13:39,568 --> 00:13:42,737 - How was your prostate operation? - Fine. As good as new. 150 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:45,365 In fact, better than ever. 151 00:13:45,449 --> 00:13:47,158 Look, Frank... 152 00:13:47,284 --> 00:13:51,704 I know it's awkward, but you're not still obsessed with our relationship, are you? 153 00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:54,082 Obsessed? Who's obsessed? 154 00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:57,752 Because you backed out of the wedding two years ago? I'd forgotten. 155 00:13:57,878 --> 00:14:00,713 Ancient history, like the Democratic Party. 156 00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:03,550 He was in tears. In church, crying like a baby. 157 00:14:03,634 --> 00:14:06,511 - Get a hold of yourself! - I had to return 13 Cuisinarts. 158 00:14:06,595 --> 00:14:08,972 - That's enough. - I kept the salad shooter, though. 159 00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:10,890 Jane, there you are. 160 00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:12,851 Hello, Jane. 161 00:14:12,935 --> 00:14:16,604 Dr Meinheimer. Frank, this is Dr Albert Meinheimer. 162 00:14:16,730 --> 00:14:20,233 - Don't get up. Nice to meet you. - Likewise, I'm sure. 163 00:14:20,568 --> 00:14:23,194 I believe we met at the White House dinner. 164 00:14:23,612 --> 00:14:26,906 He never forgets a face. He has a photographic memory. 165 00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:31,077 It's a terrible thing that's happened. I hope you find the people responsible. 166 00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:35,331 I'm sorry I can't be more optimistic, but we have a long road ahead of us. 167 00:14:35,457 --> 00:14:40,003 It's like sex, a painstaking task that seems to go on and on forever, 168 00:14:40,129 --> 00:14:43,798 and when you think that things are going your way, nothing happens. 169 00:14:43,966 --> 00:14:48,428 Jane, about this man you saw last night... Anything can help. 170 00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,597 I gave the sketch artist a description. 171 00:14:54,977 --> 00:14:58,813 Eh... Ed! That'll be all, McTigue. 172 00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:05,278 We should get that other artist. The one that never dates and lives with two guys. 173 00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:07,238 Right. Sorenson! 174 00:15:07,364 --> 00:15:11,326 I'd like to see the rest of the Institute, if you don't mind? 175 00:15:11,452 --> 00:15:13,995 Of course. We should start with the research area. 176 00:15:14,121 --> 00:15:17,248 That's a good idea. It's right this way. 177 00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:21,961 What can you tell me about the man you saw last night? 178 00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:24,464 - He's Caucasian. - Caucasian? 179 00:15:24,548 --> 00:15:28,927 Yeah. You know, white guy. With a moustache, about 6'3". 180 00:15:29,011 --> 00:15:31,721 An awfully big moustache. What's this all about? 181 00:15:31,847 --> 00:15:34,265 This is our research laboratory. 182 00:15:34,391 --> 00:15:36,267 There are hundreds of experiments going on, 183 00:15:36,352 --> 00:15:39,395 all temperature-controlled by the machinery just below us. 184 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:44,025 Our scientists have spent years on them and are just now making breakthroughs. 185 00:15:44,193 --> 00:15:46,736 Today, we'll join two compounds... 186 00:15:51,367 --> 00:15:52,867 Oh, my God! 187 00:15:53,077 --> 00:15:56,371 Thank heavens the bomb didn't damage the research area. 188 00:15:56,497 --> 00:15:59,666 Yes, but I can't understand who'd do such a thing. 189 00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:02,669 Jane, I think you ought to know something. 190 00:16:02,753 --> 00:16:05,046 - Jane, darling! - Quentin! 191 00:16:05,214 --> 00:16:09,217 Jane, are you all right? I was so worried about you. 192 00:16:09,551 --> 00:16:13,179 I'm really okay, but I'm glad you're here. 193 00:16:14,473 --> 00:16:18,810 I'm sorry! Frank, this is Quentin Hapsburg of the Hexagon Oil Company. 194 00:16:18,894 --> 00:16:22,480 - Pleased to meet you, Mr... - Drebin. Frank Drebin. 195 00:16:22,564 --> 00:16:25,066 I believe I've used some of your restrooms. 196 00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:28,569 I'm sure you have. 197 00:16:28,737 --> 00:16:32,573 - Are you connected with the Institute? - Not officially. 198 00:16:32,741 --> 00:16:36,536 But Jane and I have seen quite a lot of each other lately. 199 00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:38,830 How is my little hell-cat? 200 00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:44,919 Well, that's great. I've been dating, too. Nice girl, an author. 201 00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:48,339 Wrote the book on male sexual dysfunction. You've probably read it. 202 00:16:48,424 --> 00:16:50,591 - I beg your pardon? - Please... 203 00:16:50,759 --> 00:16:53,344 I'm sure we can handle the situation maturely, 204 00:16:53,429 --> 00:16:55,847 just like the responsible adults that we are. 205 00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:58,975 Isn't that right, Mr Poopy Pants? 206 00:16:59,143 --> 00:17:00,977 - That does it! - Frank! 207 00:17:01,061 --> 00:17:03,980 Quentin, maybe you should excuse us. 208 00:17:04,106 --> 00:17:07,275 Anything you wish, my darling. 209 00:17:08,110 --> 00:17:10,611 Until tonight, then... 210 00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:36,637 I'm feeling blue 211 00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:43,561 Just thinking of you 212 00:17:43,645 --> 00:17:47,648 I get out of bed 213 00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:54,155 Wish I was dead 214 00:17:54,323 --> 00:18:00,161 And I hope you do, too 215 00:18:00,662 --> 00:18:07,585 So I've given up I've thrown in the towel 216 00:18:09,129 --> 00:18:11,714 I've taken all the pills 217 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:17,345 The law will allow 218 00:18:17,805 --> 00:18:20,640 And so I'm feeling blue 219 00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:21,724 Sir? 220 00:18:24,186 --> 00:18:26,020 Give me the strongest thing you've got. 221 00:18:30,484 --> 00:18:34,320 - On second thought, a Black Russian. - Very well, sir. 222 00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:39,033 I guess I'm just 223 00:18:39,868 --> 00:18:45,206 Screwed 224 00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:48,042 Frank. I thought I'd find you here. 225 00:18:48,210 --> 00:18:51,671 Ed, sit down. Pull up a memory or two. 226 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,715 You left before I could talk to you. 227 00:18:54,883 --> 00:19:00,596 Is it just my imagination or is the whole world crazy? 228 00:19:00,722 --> 00:19:04,267 No, it's just a small percentage of the population, Frank. 229 00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:10,731 I hope you're right. It's just that I don't know if I fit in any more. 230 00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:14,485 You're still thinking about Jane, aren't you? 231 00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:18,489 She's part of my life, Ed. Always will be. 232 00:19:18,657 --> 00:19:21,826 I think about her constantly. But it's done. 233 00:19:22,327 --> 00:19:25,454 When she said, "Get out of my life forever," I knew it was over. 234 00:19:26,748 --> 00:19:29,667 Sometimes I think about you and Edna, and I envy you, 235 00:19:29,751 --> 00:19:35,464 because you've had the same person every day for over 30 years. 236 00:19:35,716 --> 00:19:39,093 You wake up with her, eat with her, sleep with her... 237 00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,721 You make love to the same woman. 238 00:19:42,222 --> 00:19:47,185 You spend every possible waking moment together, 239 00:19:47,269 --> 00:19:52,565 while I'm out with 20-year-olds who just want to have fun and cheap sex. 240 00:19:52,649 --> 00:19:55,443 Girls who can't say no, who can't get enough. 241 00:19:55,527 --> 00:19:59,447 "More, more, more! It's your turn now to wear the handcuffs. " 242 00:20:04,703 --> 00:20:07,705 I just want to love, Ed. 243 00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:10,958 I'm sure you'll find love. 244 00:20:11,084 --> 00:20:13,294 - I already have one. - It's from the lady. 245 00:20:19,301 --> 00:20:23,429 Go to her, Frank. Go on! 246 00:20:24,139 --> 00:20:25,473 I'll see you in the morning. 247 00:20:29,645 --> 00:20:32,313 - Excuse me. - Pardon me. 248 00:20:33,732 --> 00:20:35,149 Sorry. 249 00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:39,654 This isn't easy to say. 250 00:20:39,821 --> 00:20:42,907 I'm lonely, I'm lost. I need someone to hold, to love. 251 00:20:42,991 --> 00:20:43,991 Frank! 252 00:20:45,953 --> 00:20:46,994 Over here. 253 00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:50,248 Well... 254 00:20:55,170 --> 00:20:58,339 - What are you doing here? - I called your hotel, got no answer. 255 00:20:58,507 --> 00:21:03,511 Then I tried the station house. I thought maybe you'd be here. 256 00:21:03,762 --> 00:21:08,224 - Good evening, Sam. - Mr Drebin. Jane. 257 00:21:08,350 --> 00:21:11,519 Always nice to see nice people. 258 00:21:11,770 --> 00:21:16,274 Sam, play our song. Just one more time. 259 00:21:16,358 --> 00:21:18,776 Of course. 260 00:21:20,904 --> 00:21:25,783 Ding dong, the witch is dead Which old witch? The wicked witch... 261 00:21:25,909 --> 00:21:30,871 Sam. That's enough. Play the other one, please. 262 00:21:31,707 --> 00:21:34,125 You can't let old hurts die, can you? 263 00:21:34,209 --> 00:21:36,711 You walk out of my life, no explanation... 264 00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:39,964 - Didn't you get the letters? - Every one of them. 265 00:21:40,048 --> 00:21:42,883 I didn't open them. I tore them up and threw them in the fire. 266 00:21:43,051 --> 00:21:48,055 So you didn't get the cheque for $75,000 that your uncle left you in his will? 267 00:21:48,265 --> 00:21:49,432 Why are you here? 268 00:21:50,475 --> 00:21:53,060 I remembered something about the crime. 269 00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:55,896 Outside the window, I saw a red van parked across the street. 270 00:21:56,648 --> 00:21:59,483 Red van? Thank you, that'll be very helpful. 271 00:21:59,568 --> 00:22:01,569 You've said your piece, you can go now, right? 272 00:22:02,237 --> 00:22:04,947 That's not my only reason for being here. 273 00:22:05,032 --> 00:22:08,409 - I want us to be friends. - Sure, friends... 274 00:22:08,493 --> 00:22:11,495 I bet if I dusted you for prints, they'd be your lover Quentin's. 275 00:22:12,247 --> 00:22:13,914 You... 276 00:22:14,124 --> 00:22:17,293 I see a certain kitten still knows how to scratch. 277 00:22:25,135 --> 00:22:28,262 I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. 278 00:22:31,099 --> 00:22:34,935 We're no good together. All you ever lived for was police work. 279 00:22:35,062 --> 00:22:37,855 You were always busy saving the "end zone" layer. 280 00:22:38,106 --> 00:22:41,609 Ozone layer! Frank, you never tried to understand. 281 00:22:42,027 --> 00:22:43,944 How can you say that, 282 00:22:44,071 --> 00:22:48,449 when I sank every penny into buying 1,000 acres of Brazilian rainforest. 283 00:22:48,575 --> 00:22:51,619 Then I had it slashed so we could build our dream house. 284 00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:53,996 Frank! How could you be so insensitive? 285 00:22:54,122 --> 00:22:58,209 Insensitive? You think it's easy displacing an entire tribe? 286 00:22:58,293 --> 00:23:03,130 - You try it sometime. - I'd better go. This was a mistake. 287 00:23:03,256 --> 00:23:07,551 I don't know why I came here. I was hoping that you'd have someone. 288 00:23:08,303 --> 00:23:12,098 I'm single. I love being single! 289 00:23:13,225 --> 00:23:17,645 I haven't had this much sex since I was a Boy Scout leader! 290 00:23:20,899 --> 00:23:25,486 I mean, at the time, I was dating a lot. 291 00:23:35,664 --> 00:23:37,873 I told you the bombing wouldn't work. 292 00:23:38,166 --> 00:23:39,917 We had no choice. 293 00:23:40,001 --> 00:23:41,293 Look at this headline. 294 00:23:42,129 --> 00:23:45,881 "President to give Meinheimer blank cheque at Press Club Dinner. " 295 00:23:45,966 --> 00:23:48,175 That speech is in two days. 296 00:23:48,260 --> 00:23:50,261 - Don't you think I know that? - We all know that. 297 00:23:51,346 --> 00:23:53,681 Gentlemen, gentlemen... 298 00:23:55,016 --> 00:23:58,352 I know that you're all worried, and I agree. 299 00:23:58,687 --> 00:24:01,355 There's plenty to be worried about. 300 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:04,275 Like this solar power plant, 301 00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:07,361 already operational outside Los Angeles. 302 00:24:07,487 --> 00:24:09,613 Photovoltaic cells. 303 00:24:09,739 --> 00:24:13,701 They convert sunlight directly into electricity. 304 00:24:13,952 --> 00:24:17,997 Fluorescents. Last 10 times as long as a conventional light-bulb. 305 00:24:18,331 --> 00:24:20,291 Uses only a quarter of the power. 306 00:24:20,375 --> 00:24:25,254 Superwindows. They insulate as well as 10 sheets of glass. 307 00:24:25,380 --> 00:24:30,384 An electric car, partially powered by solar panels. 308 00:24:30,510 --> 00:24:33,304 But the truth is, gentlemen, 309 00:24:33,430 --> 00:24:37,057 that I'm not worried about any of these things. 310 00:24:37,684 --> 00:24:41,562 Because no one is ever going to know about them. 311 00:24:41,646 --> 00:24:46,233 - What about Meinheimer and his report? - He's going to tell the President. 312 00:24:46,401 --> 00:24:49,904 Good question. Why don't we just ask him? 313 00:24:51,865 --> 00:24:54,575 - That's kidnapping! - Good heavens! 314 00:24:54,826 --> 00:25:00,206 - What about his speech on Tuesday? - Dr Meinheimer will deliver his speech. 315 00:25:00,290 --> 00:25:05,920 It is my view that we must rely on coal, oil and nuclear energy. 316 00:25:06,087 --> 00:25:08,631 Our Dr Meinheimer. 317 00:25:09,090 --> 00:25:12,218 - Oh, my God! - That's incredible! 318 00:25:12,344 --> 00:25:16,764 Meet Earl Hacker, former arts consultant to Jesse Helms. 319 00:25:17,933 --> 00:25:23,812 As I explained to Mr Hapsburg, my fee is $1 million, 320 00:25:23,939 --> 00:25:28,692 and, might I add, I'm worth every penny of it. 321 00:25:28,777 --> 00:25:32,446 But you gentlemen don't have any choice. 322 00:25:35,450 --> 00:25:37,701 Do you? 323 00:25:45,752 --> 00:25:50,214 After a good night's sleep, I headed back to police headquarters. 324 00:25:50,423 --> 00:25:53,259 I figured that if I buried myself in police work, 325 00:25:53,343 --> 00:25:56,387 I could forget about Jane and maybe in the process 326 00:25:56,513 --> 00:25:58,973 catch a vicious killer before he struck again. 327 00:25:59,391 --> 00:26:03,060 So far we had few clues and no real leads. 328 00:26:03,144 --> 00:26:06,021 I was hoping that the lab boys had come up with something. 329 00:26:06,106 --> 00:26:07,731 Shut it off! 330 00:26:07,816 --> 00:26:08,899 And now one of you pays. 331 00:26:08,984 --> 00:26:12,278 - Take it easy. - Say your prayers. 332 00:26:12,904 --> 00:26:14,655 - Nice work. - What? 333 00:26:14,781 --> 00:26:18,158 Can you show us the results from the Research Institute? 334 00:26:18,285 --> 00:26:21,287 We weren't able to get any clean fingerprints, 335 00:26:21,496 --> 00:26:24,623 but we did find footprints outside the Institute. 336 00:26:24,749 --> 00:26:28,669 We made plaster casts of them. A size 91/2 D. 337 00:26:28,795 --> 00:26:31,964 We're running a trace on it. But more interesting, 338 00:26:32,048 --> 00:26:35,009 we also found this dinosaur footprint. 339 00:26:35,135 --> 00:26:39,179 - A major find from the Palaeolithic era. - Anything else? 340 00:26:39,347 --> 00:26:44,727 Yes, 20 feet down we discovered ancient timbers from Noah's Ark. 341 00:26:44,853 --> 00:26:46,604 About the case... 342 00:26:46,688 --> 00:26:50,024 I'll be leaving for Boston tomorrow where I'll deliver a major address 343 00:26:50,108 --> 00:26:51,859 to the American Archaeological Society. 344 00:26:52,193 --> 00:26:54,695 And I'm booked on Geraldo next week. 345 00:26:54,779 --> 00:26:57,489 You're going on Geraldo because of this? 346 00:26:58,074 --> 00:27:01,076 No, my wife is a transsexual Satan worshipper. 347 00:27:01,202 --> 00:27:04,121 Meanwhile, we'll be continuing fingerprint analysis, 348 00:27:04,247 --> 00:27:07,750 fibre checks, DNA breakdown and hair samples. 349 00:27:07,876 --> 00:27:11,295 Then, using the microscopic dirt particles on this footprint, 350 00:27:11,379 --> 00:27:14,214 we'll get a geological breakdown of the entire city. 351 00:27:14,549 --> 00:27:16,967 We may not have that kind of time. 352 00:27:17,052 --> 00:27:18,677 Then maybe this will help. 353 00:27:19,763 --> 00:27:23,515 We found this wallet on the kerb outside the Institute. 354 00:27:23,642 --> 00:27:28,812 We haven't examined it thoroughly. It just came down from the lab. 355 00:27:29,522 --> 00:27:34,902 "Hector Savage". From Detroit. I remember this pug. 356 00:27:35,028 --> 00:27:37,946 Ex-boxer. His real name was Joey Chicago. 357 00:27:38,031 --> 00:27:41,241 Yeah. He fought under the name of Kid Minneapolis. 358 00:27:41,409 --> 00:27:44,578 I saw Kid Minneapolis fight once, in Cincinnati. 359 00:27:44,663 --> 00:27:47,164 No, that's Kid New York. He fought out of Philly. 360 00:27:47,332 --> 00:27:50,668 He was killed in the ring in Houston by Tex Colorado. 361 00:27:50,794 --> 00:27:53,796 - The Arizona Assassin. - Yeah, from Dakota. 362 00:27:53,922 --> 00:27:56,048 - Was it North or South? - North. 363 00:27:56,174 --> 00:27:59,093 South Dakota was his brother. From West Virginia. 364 00:27:59,219 --> 00:28:01,345 You sure know your boxing. 365 00:28:01,429 --> 00:28:04,431 All I know is, never bet on the white guy. 366 00:28:04,683 --> 00:28:08,519 - You've got an address? - The card says, "Monique De Carlo". 367 00:28:08,603 --> 00:28:11,146 "210 Bleckman Street. " 368 00:28:11,439 --> 00:28:16,110 That's the red-light district. I wonder why Savage is hanging out down there. 369 00:28:16,403 --> 00:28:18,404 Sex, Frank? 370 00:28:19,531 --> 00:28:23,534 No, not right now, Ed. We've got work to do. 371 00:28:25,954 --> 00:28:30,999 The address we had for De Carlo was in the city's Little Italy. 372 00:28:31,126 --> 00:28:35,671 We went there, hoping it would lead us to Hector Savage 373 00:28:35,797 --> 00:28:39,925 and lead us to a clue that would break the case wide open. 374 00:28:42,554 --> 00:28:45,305 That's the cops. You've got to get rid of them. 375 00:28:46,141 --> 00:28:49,727 All right, I'll handle it. Quick, hide in the basement. 376 00:28:49,853 --> 00:28:52,479 You'll be safe down there. 377 00:28:54,149 --> 00:28:56,108 - Ed. - Frank. 378 00:28:56,192 --> 00:28:58,026 - Red van. - Yes, I know. 379 00:28:58,111 --> 00:28:59,403 Jane said that she saw a red van 380 00:28:59,487 --> 00:29:02,531 outside the Institute before the explosion. 381 00:29:02,699 --> 00:29:05,617 - Let's take him down. - No, he's not working alone. 382 00:29:06,119 --> 00:29:09,079 - Bug the van. See where it goes. - Good thinking. 383 00:29:09,164 --> 00:29:11,749 - Nordberg! - No problem. 384 00:29:15,086 --> 00:29:18,964 Lieutenant Frank Drebin, Police Squad. This is my Captain, Ed Hocken. 385 00:29:19,174 --> 00:29:23,093 - Is this some kind of bust? - It's very impressive, yes... 386 00:29:23,178 --> 00:29:26,180 But we need to ask you a few questions. 387 00:29:32,854 --> 00:29:38,400 Listen. We're looking for Hector Savage. Where is he? 388 00:29:38,485 --> 00:29:40,611 Why should I tell you? 389 00:29:40,695 --> 00:29:43,614 Because I'm the last line of defence between sleaze like this 390 00:29:43,698 --> 00:29:46,492 and the decent people in this town. 391 00:29:46,576 --> 00:29:53,207 Hi, Frank. We got that D-83 Swedish Sure-Grip Suck Machine you ordered. 392 00:29:54,542 --> 00:29:56,126 It's a gift. 393 00:30:13,228 --> 00:30:16,355 Frank, come here. Quick! 394 00:30:16,439 --> 00:30:18,190 It's Savage. He's on the move. 395 00:30:22,028 --> 00:30:24,321 What? Hey! 396 00:30:24,489 --> 00:30:28,408 Hey! Stop, stop! I'm a police officer! 397 00:30:29,577 --> 00:30:33,080 Let's go. But remember, we can't let him spot us. 398 00:30:34,082 --> 00:30:35,874 Pull over! 399 00:30:38,211 --> 00:30:40,921 Nordberg's bugging device is right on the money. 400 00:30:41,005 --> 00:30:43,423 I'm not kidding! Stop! 401 00:30:45,552 --> 00:30:47,469 Shit! 402 00:30:48,638 --> 00:30:51,098 He's changing direction. Stop the car. 403 00:30:51,808 --> 00:30:53,934 Oh, no! 404 00:30:54,143 --> 00:30:56,854 - He's getting closer. - We should see him any minute. 405 00:30:56,980 --> 00:30:58,313 Keep your eyes peeled. 406 00:30:58,439 --> 00:31:00,107 Oh, no! 407 00:31:01,276 --> 00:31:03,277 Look, he's real close now. 408 00:31:05,446 --> 00:31:07,531 Step on it! 409 00:31:07,866 --> 00:31:10,742 Help! Stop, stop! 410 00:31:27,927 --> 00:31:30,053 Frank, stop! 411 00:31:30,138 --> 00:31:34,516 Stop right now! I've had it! I said stop! 412 00:31:44,861 --> 00:31:46,904 Help! 413 00:31:48,323 --> 00:31:50,741 Drebin, Police Squad. What do we have? 414 00:31:50,825 --> 00:31:54,494 It's a tense situation. Savage is holed up in that house. 415 00:31:54,579 --> 00:31:58,415 - Says he's got hostages. - He could be bluffing. Anything else? 416 00:31:58,583 --> 00:32:04,338 Yeah. That red van is registered to one Quentin Hapsburg. 417 00:32:06,424 --> 00:32:11,261 Well, it looks like the cows have come home to roost. 418 00:32:11,346 --> 00:32:13,513 How are you doing, trooper? 419 00:32:17,894 --> 00:32:20,020 Hey, stop firing! 420 00:32:20,104 --> 00:32:22,856 Hold it! Stop firing! 421 00:32:25,360 --> 00:32:30,447 Stop firing! Stop firing! 422 00:32:31,115 --> 00:32:34,618 All right, give me the bullhorn. 423 00:32:34,702 --> 00:32:37,162 This is Frank Drebin, Police Squad. 424 00:32:37,246 --> 00:32:41,375 Throw down your guns and come out with your hands up, 425 00:32:41,668 --> 00:32:46,004 or come on out, then throw down your guns, whichever you want. 426 00:32:46,089 --> 00:32:48,423 Remember the two key elements. 427 00:32:48,549 --> 00:32:52,803 One, guns to be thrown down. Two, come on out. 428 00:32:52,929 --> 00:32:58,183 You just try and take me, Drebin! I've got more if you want them, copper! 429 00:32:58,267 --> 00:33:01,895 - Looks like he's holding all the cards. - Not all the cards. 430 00:33:02,021 --> 00:33:03,313 How about it? 431 00:33:03,439 --> 00:33:06,358 You can't drive that tank! You're not checked-out on it! 432 00:33:06,442 --> 00:33:09,611 Don't worry, Ed! Just keep him busy. 433 00:33:10,321 --> 00:33:12,823 All right, what do you want? 434 00:33:12,949 --> 00:33:16,910 I want a car out front. Something fun. A Porsche. 435 00:33:17,370 --> 00:33:20,831 Then I want a plane ticket to Jamaica. And I want a nice hotel. 436 00:33:20,915 --> 00:33:22,708 No touristy place. 437 00:33:23,167 --> 00:33:25,877 Something indicative of the people and their culture. 438 00:33:25,962 --> 00:33:29,506 We can't do that. We're calling your bluff. 439 00:33:29,632 --> 00:33:32,551 Now put your hands on top of your head and come out. 440 00:33:32,677 --> 00:33:36,430 We've got you surrounded front and... Hey! 441 00:33:37,557 --> 00:33:42,561 Frank, what are you doing? Where are you going? Frank! 442 00:34:21,642 --> 00:34:24,478 Frank! Help! 443 00:34:44,165 --> 00:34:46,792 - Your coat, sir? - Yes, it is. 444 00:34:46,876 --> 00:34:49,836 And I have a receipt to prove it. 445 00:34:50,379 --> 00:34:53,131 - Telephone call, Commissioner. - Thank you. 446 00:34:53,257 --> 00:34:55,675 Excuse me. 447 00:34:56,552 --> 00:34:58,178 Yes? 448 00:34:59,222 --> 00:35:01,932 He did what? 449 00:35:02,016 --> 00:35:05,519 How many animals escaped? Oh, my God! 450 00:35:05,686 --> 00:35:09,689 Good evening, Commissioner. You're looking lovely tonight. 451 00:35:10,066 --> 00:35:14,736 Do you realise that because of you this city is being overrun by baboons? 452 00:35:14,946 --> 00:35:18,031 Well, isn't that the fault of the voters? 453 00:35:18,741 --> 00:35:20,826 Excuse me. 454 00:35:25,581 --> 00:35:31,253 Thank you all for attending this event in honour of Dr Meinheimer, 455 00:35:31,379 --> 00:35:35,215 who tomorrow will make his historic address. 456 00:35:39,720 --> 00:35:44,474 Along with the President, I pledge to support his recommendations, 457 00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:47,394 whatever they may be. 458 00:35:54,235 --> 00:35:57,237 And now, please enjoy the evening. 459 00:35:57,572 --> 00:36:00,157 I'll see you later. 460 00:36:13,671 --> 00:36:15,797 - May I cut in? - Frank! 461 00:36:15,882 --> 00:36:18,592 - What are you doing here? - I enjoy a good party. 462 00:36:18,718 --> 00:36:22,679 - Why are you really here? - I can sum that up in three words, 463 00:36:22,763 --> 00:36:27,559 "Quentin Hapsburg. " I never liked him from the moment I laid eyes on him. 464 00:36:27,685 --> 00:36:30,478 The man is as dirty as a coalminer's underwear in January. 465 00:36:30,563 --> 00:36:34,357 What's gotten into you? He's a kind, gentle, concerned man, 466 00:36:34,483 --> 00:36:38,236 who cares about people and is not as suspicious as some people I know. 467 00:36:38,321 --> 00:36:39,863 Oh, yeah? 468 00:36:39,947 --> 00:36:43,783 Ask him what his connection is with the van you saw the night of the explosion. 469 00:36:44,577 --> 00:36:46,203 I don't know what you're talking about. 470 00:36:46,287 --> 00:36:50,415 Ask him if he's pals with a two-bit goon named Hector Savage. 471 00:36:51,292 --> 00:36:54,461 Stop it! You're just jealous because another man can give me 472 00:36:54,629 --> 00:36:57,130 the understanding that you never could. 473 00:36:57,632 --> 00:37:02,052 I just hope Quentin is watching right now, because he'll be jealous. 474 00:37:02,136 --> 00:37:05,889 And a jealous man always makes the wrong move. 475 00:37:05,973 --> 00:37:07,265 I'm counting on that! 476 00:37:45,388 --> 00:37:50,600 Mr Drebin, Mr Hapsburg would like you to join him at his table. 477 00:37:58,359 --> 00:38:03,196 - Solitaire is a lonely man's game. - Lieutenant! 478 00:38:04,615 --> 00:38:08,368 I don't recall seeing your name on the guest list. 479 00:38:08,452 --> 00:38:11,997 Nothing to be embarrassed about. I sometimes go by my maiden name. 480 00:38:14,625 --> 00:38:18,586 Nice party. I see a lot of familiar face-lifts. 481 00:38:20,840 --> 00:38:25,677 - Do you gamble, Lieutenant? - Every time I order out. 482 00:38:27,722 --> 00:38:29,806 Que sera, sera... 483 00:38:29,932 --> 00:38:33,727 - You do speak French, don't you? - Unfortunately, no. 484 00:38:33,853 --> 00:38:36,062 But I do kiss that way. 485 00:38:37,064 --> 00:38:39,649 Excuse me! You happen to be standing in my place. 486 00:38:39,859 --> 00:38:42,360 Dr Meinheimer, you remember Frank? 487 00:38:44,989 --> 00:38:47,365 - Mister... - Drebin, from Police Squad. 488 00:38:47,450 --> 00:38:52,579 - You met him at the Institute. - Yes, of course! Do sit down. 489 00:38:52,747 --> 00:38:55,248 Thank you, I don't intend to stay. 490 00:38:55,374 --> 00:38:58,585 Let's play another game. Who's this? 491 00:39:02,256 --> 00:39:04,424 - I wouldn't know. - He's been a bad boy. 492 00:39:04,592 --> 00:39:08,845 He blew up a building and is driving a van registered in your name. 493 00:39:09,096 --> 00:39:13,767 We own lots of vans. One of them was stolen three days ago. 494 00:39:13,934 --> 00:39:16,144 Look, Lieutenant, I have nothing to hide. 495 00:39:16,228 --> 00:39:18,396 Maybe, but I'm warning you. 496 00:39:18,481 --> 00:39:22,609 If you so much as sneeze, I'll be there to wipe your nose. 497 00:39:28,574 --> 00:39:33,745 Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for the first door prize of the evening, 498 00:39:34,163 --> 00:39:39,042 an all-expense-paid trip to the Gilligan Islands. 499 00:39:39,919 --> 00:39:45,465 And to draw the first winner, we would like to ask our guest of honour, 500 00:39:45,549 --> 00:39:48,843 Dr Albert S. Meinheimer. 501 00:39:51,639 --> 00:39:53,890 - Let me help you. - That won't be necessary. 502 00:39:53,974 --> 00:39:55,225 No. No trouble at all. 503 00:39:55,309 --> 00:39:57,644 I don't understand what's gotten into Frank. 504 00:39:57,728 --> 00:40:00,980 I'm afraid it's merely a case ofjealousy, my dear. 505 00:40:01,649 --> 00:40:06,027 You're going to wear all my gears down. We shouldn't push it like this. 506 00:40:44,942 --> 00:40:48,736 - He gets around marvellously. - He does. 507 00:42:02,561 --> 00:42:04,020 - Frank? - Jane. 508 00:42:04,146 --> 00:42:08,191 I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry about what happened tonight. 509 00:42:08,275 --> 00:42:12,362 - Oh, Frank. - I need to talk to you. May I come in? 510 00:42:12,821 --> 00:42:16,491 Okay, but the place is kind of a mess. 511 00:42:16,575 --> 00:42:19,661 I was about to make a protein shake. Do you want some? 512 00:42:19,745 --> 00:42:22,205 No, thank you. 513 00:42:22,414 --> 00:42:26,084 Are you sure? I'm trying out a new recipe tonight. 514 00:42:26,460 --> 00:42:30,296 Do you know what Dr Meinheimer will say at the dinner tomorrow? 515 00:42:30,381 --> 00:42:35,468 Yes, he'll endorse energy efficiency and renewable energy like solar power. 516 00:42:35,553 --> 00:42:39,472 - Who else knew that? - Only me. And I told Quentin. 517 00:42:39,557 --> 00:42:44,185 And if the President adopts a policy of supporting efficiency and solar energy, 518 00:42:44,270 --> 00:42:45,853 who would be the biggest losers? 519 00:42:45,980 --> 00:42:49,107 Coal, oil and nuclear. 520 00:42:49,191 --> 00:42:54,737 - Frank! Frank! - Just one more question. 521 00:42:54,863 --> 00:42:58,032 You told me that Dr Meinheimer had a photographic memory, 522 00:42:58,158 --> 00:43:02,078 yet tonight he never recalled meeting me. 523 00:43:02,204 --> 00:43:05,623 That's strange, but he has been under a lot of stress lately. 524 00:43:05,708 --> 00:43:09,377 Does he have any identifying marks? A scar, a mole, a tattoo, 525 00:43:10,170 --> 00:43:13,256 webbed toes or a third nostril? 526 00:43:13,465 --> 00:43:17,760 He has a birthmark in the shape of Whistler's Mother on his right buttock. 527 00:43:17,886 --> 00:43:23,016 I see... Have you noticed anything different about him? 528 00:43:23,434 --> 00:43:28,605 Only that he is a foot taller and seems to be left-handed now. 529 00:43:29,023 --> 00:43:31,357 Frank! What are you trying to tell me? 530 00:43:31,483 --> 00:43:34,902 That Quentin has found a double for Dr Meinheimer 531 00:43:34,987 --> 00:43:38,031 and that he will give a fraudulent report to the President? 532 00:43:38,699 --> 00:43:42,243 That's brilliant. That's a lot better than what I had come up with. 533 00:43:42,369 --> 00:43:46,581 Stop it, this is preposterous! Is there no end to your jealousy? 534 00:43:46,707 --> 00:43:49,042 Jane, you're hurting me. 535 00:43:49,376 --> 00:43:51,961 - What more do you want from me? - Can I use your phone? 536 00:43:52,046 --> 00:43:53,463 - Local call? - Yes. 537 00:43:53,547 --> 00:43:58,009 All right. If you'll excuse me, I have to take my shower. 538 00:43:58,093 --> 00:44:03,056 The phone is in the other room. You can let yourself out. Goodbye. 539 00:44:19,573 --> 00:44:22,492 Give me Captain Ed Hocken, please. 540 00:44:30,834 --> 00:44:35,546 Ed, I'm onto something big. I'll need you and Nordberg tomorrow. 541 00:44:35,631 --> 00:44:38,257 What is he doing in Detroit? 542 00:44:38,717 --> 00:44:41,135 Send him the plane fare and a new pair of pants. 543 00:45:31,812 --> 00:45:36,107 Of the way we were 544 00:45:36,316 --> 00:45:39,569 Memories 545 00:45:39,987 --> 00:45:44,699 Like the colours of my mind 546 00:45:44,783 --> 00:45:49,662 Misty water-coloured memories 547 00:45:51,039 --> 00:45:55,042 Of the way we were 548 00:45:55,210 --> 00:45:59,797 Scattered pictures 549 00:45:59,882 --> 00:46:04,302 Of the smiles we left behind 550 00:46:05,262 --> 00:46:11,392 Smiles we gave to one another 551 00:46:11,518 --> 00:46:15,354 Of the way we were 552 00:46:15,856 --> 00:46:20,318 Can it be that it was all so simple then 553 00:46:20,486 --> 00:46:23,946 Or has time rewritten... 554 00:46:25,949 --> 00:46:27,867 Frank! 555 00:47:16,583 --> 00:47:19,460 Just as I suspected. 556 00:47:20,379 --> 00:47:23,631 Come on, on your feet. 557 00:47:55,372 --> 00:47:56,873 Jane... 558 00:47:56,957 --> 00:47:58,916 What happened to the water pressure? 559 00:48:00,544 --> 00:48:01,544 Jane! 560 00:48:04,381 --> 00:48:05,965 Frank! 561 00:48:06,884 --> 00:48:09,302 I was so frightened! 562 00:48:10,470 --> 00:48:14,015 - What happened out there? - It's nothing to worry about. 563 00:48:14,099 --> 00:48:18,185 But if I were you, I wouldn't leave until they shampoo the carpets. 564 00:48:18,312 --> 00:48:23,274 - Who would want to kill you? - Before tonight, only the cable company. 565 00:48:23,358 --> 00:48:28,821 Now I'm afraid it's one of Hapsburg's goons. He was carrying this. 566 00:48:32,034 --> 00:48:36,078 Oh, Frank! I feel like such a fool. 567 00:48:37,039 --> 00:48:40,833 - I should never have doubted you. - There, there... 568 00:48:41,168 --> 00:48:45,379 You couldn't know that the man you were dating was a murdering sociopath. 569 00:48:45,464 --> 00:48:48,591 Oh, Frank! We have to help Dr Meinheimer. 570 00:48:48,675 --> 00:48:51,010 - He's in danger. - Yes. 571 00:48:51,136 --> 00:48:53,679 They'll probably torture him, then kill him. 572 00:48:53,847 --> 00:48:55,514 It's all my fault! 573 00:48:56,016 --> 00:48:59,936 They'll start by tearing out his toenails and then move on to the nose hairs. 574 00:49:00,062 --> 00:49:02,480 Oh, no! What are we going to do? 575 00:49:02,689 --> 00:49:06,567 If my hunch is right, they're holding him hostage here. 576 00:49:06,777 --> 00:49:10,154 - At the Home Club? - What? No! 577 00:49:10,530 --> 00:49:14,450 At this warehouse. I've got to get going to rescue him. 578 00:49:14,576 --> 00:49:18,037 - You'll be careful? - Of course I will. 579 00:49:20,082 --> 00:49:22,291 I will... 580 00:49:23,126 --> 00:49:26,170 I guess I'd better be on my way. 581 00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:30,883 I promised Nordberg we'd bake a raisin nut-bread tonight. 582 00:49:35,013 --> 00:49:37,556 I can't fight it any more! 583 00:49:38,058 --> 00:49:43,437 I ran away from you once. I can't do it again. Will you stay with me? 584 00:49:43,522 --> 00:49:45,106 Please? 585 00:52:51,418 --> 00:52:54,420 Frank, we've got no business doing this. 586 00:52:54,546 --> 00:52:57,214 We've only got a dock pass and your hunch. 587 00:52:57,340 --> 00:53:03,179 Hapsburg is up to something right up to his pretty, imported shirt collar. 588 00:53:07,142 --> 00:53:12,396 It's a perfect day. This fog'll keep us concealed to Hapsburg's warehouse. 589 00:53:12,480 --> 00:53:16,483 That's not fog. The number two engine's on fire. They're putting it out. 590 00:53:16,610 --> 00:53:19,111 Let's run through this one more time. 591 00:53:19,196 --> 00:53:23,324 At 3: 15, Nordberg will cut the power lines, knocking out the alarms. 592 00:53:23,450 --> 00:53:24,909 Yeah. Right. 593 00:53:24,993 --> 00:53:27,161 - Nordberg. - Got it. 594 00:53:27,245 --> 00:53:30,289 I'll be in the van waiting for your signal. Are you wired-up? 595 00:53:30,498 --> 00:53:33,167 Yeah. Right. 596 00:53:33,293 --> 00:53:37,796 When you hear me say, "I love it", you guys move in. 597 00:53:38,131 --> 00:53:39,548 - Check. - Ready, Frank? 598 00:53:49,184 --> 00:53:51,310 The water's over there. 599 00:53:56,316 --> 00:53:57,900 Hexagon Oil commercial number one. 600 00:54:01,029 --> 00:54:05,032 Piloting today's giant oil tankers is a big responsibility. 601 00:54:05,116 --> 00:54:08,494 That's why here at Hexagon's Tanker Captain Training School, 602 00:54:08,662 --> 00:54:12,122 future captains go through a rigorous instruction programme. 603 00:54:12,499 --> 00:54:14,667 Through a complicated elimination process, 604 00:54:14,751 --> 00:54:18,170 we weed out those less qualified for the day-to-day operation 605 00:54:18,255 --> 00:54:21,257 of a 500,000-tonne single hull super tanker. 606 00:54:21,383 --> 00:54:23,801 Only the best will take command 607 00:54:23,927 --> 00:54:28,055 of what is essentially a floating ecological time bomb. 608 00:54:40,068 --> 00:54:41,485 Commercial two. 609 00:54:42,696 --> 00:54:45,614 Just the way I like it! 610 00:54:46,616 --> 00:54:49,201 Someday, way into the future, 611 00:54:49,327 --> 00:54:53,998 the sun may be able to provide for all our energy needs. 612 00:54:54,082 --> 00:54:56,542 But right now, it gives us a comfortable feeling 613 00:54:56,668 --> 00:55:00,671 to know that our home is being supplied by nuclear power. 614 00:55:00,755 --> 00:55:03,674 I know what you're thinking, but we're not worried. 615 00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:06,635 We know that nuclear energy is safe. 616 00:55:06,720 --> 00:55:11,098 In fact, we think of it as our friendly neighbour. 617 00:55:11,224 --> 00:55:14,935 But remember, our friend can't exist without huge government subsidies. 618 00:55:15,020 --> 00:55:18,397 So tell your congressman to keep those government dollars 619 00:55:18,481 --> 00:55:20,983 rolling into nuclear power. 620 00:55:26,531 --> 00:55:28,866 I'll have to find another way in, Ed. 621 00:55:28,992 --> 00:55:32,036 They've got killer guard dogs here. Do you read me? 622 00:55:32,162 --> 00:55:34,955 Loud and clear. Nordberg, how are we doing? 623 00:55:36,207 --> 00:55:38,959 We're at our destination. 624 00:55:41,963 --> 00:55:44,423 Ed, I'm going to try the roof. 625 00:55:49,804 --> 00:55:51,972 I'm going to try it again. 626 00:56:34,224 --> 00:56:35,724 - Cut the power line. - Right. 627 00:56:40,146 --> 00:56:41,563 Help! 628 00:56:42,023 --> 00:56:45,734 Come in, Nordberg. Frank, hold on. We have a problem. 629 00:56:57,163 --> 00:57:00,332 Well... It's Lieutenant Drebin. 630 00:57:00,834 --> 00:57:04,461 You were supposed to have been killed last night. 631 00:57:05,422 --> 00:57:10,008 But now I think I'm going to enjoy doing it myself. 632 00:57:10,135 --> 00:57:13,345 It'll be slow and painful. 633 00:57:18,184 --> 00:57:21,687 - What's that smell? - That would be me. 634 00:57:21,855 --> 00:57:25,816 I have been swimming in raw sewage. I love it. 635 00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:28,610 I love it! 636 00:57:29,112 --> 00:57:31,697 That's the signal, let's go. 637 00:57:34,033 --> 00:57:36,410 It's stuck. Give me a hand. 638 00:57:36,536 --> 00:57:39,163 Ed, help me! Ed! 639 00:57:39,497 --> 00:57:40,539 Search him. 640 00:57:46,171 --> 00:57:48,297 I love it! 641 00:57:52,552 --> 00:57:54,678 He's wired! 642 00:57:56,639 --> 00:57:57,723 Tie him up! 643 00:57:58,766 --> 00:58:01,894 You'll never get away with this, Hapsburg. 644 00:58:01,978 --> 00:58:05,856 - Whatever it is... - All right, I'll show you. 645 00:58:05,940 --> 00:58:08,400 Let me introduce you to some people. 646 00:58:10,278 --> 00:58:12,488 Of course, you know Dr Meinheimer. 647 00:58:14,407 --> 00:58:16,241 And you've met Earl Hacker. 648 00:58:16,910 --> 00:58:19,411 Why you son of a... 649 00:58:19,496 --> 00:58:22,539 And then I'd like you to meet the Redmans. 650 00:58:23,708 --> 00:58:26,418 Weekend guests from out of town. 651 00:58:27,086 --> 00:58:30,714 We're going to the Press Club Dinner. Make sure nothing happens to Drebin 652 00:58:30,882 --> 00:58:31,924 until I come back. 653 00:58:33,092 --> 00:58:38,305 Then I want the pleasure of killing you myself. 654 00:58:38,431 --> 00:58:40,807 The pleasure is all mine. 655 00:58:45,313 --> 00:58:48,190 See you after the speech, Lieutenant. 656 01:00:19,866 --> 01:00:22,284 - Freeze! - That's it. Freeze! 657 01:00:22,452 --> 01:00:24,202 Don't move! 658 01:00:25,872 --> 01:00:29,916 Good Lord! Look at what they did to Dr Meinheimer. 659 01:00:30,710 --> 01:00:33,462 Are you okay, Dr Meinheimer? 660 01:00:35,423 --> 01:00:38,634 That's okay. Don't try to talk. 661 01:00:40,928 --> 01:00:44,973 I just can't take this any more. 662 01:00:45,099 --> 01:00:47,976 Garbage like you just makes me sick! 663 01:00:48,102 --> 01:00:49,811 - Ed... - Okay? 664 01:00:49,896 --> 01:00:55,651 I'm just John Q. Public now. It's just you and me. 665 01:00:56,444 --> 01:00:58,153 - Mano a mano. - Ed... 666 01:00:58,279 --> 01:01:01,615 I'll teach you to pick on a helpless invalid! 667 01:01:08,331 --> 01:01:10,832 All right, he's had enough! 668 01:01:11,084 --> 01:01:14,753 Somebody help the Captain. We've got to get to that dinner. 669 01:01:15,213 --> 01:01:16,505 This guy's heavy! 670 01:01:22,470 --> 01:01:24,429 Any predictions, Mr Sununu? 671 01:01:24,597 --> 01:01:28,266 There won't be any surprises in Dr Meinheimer's address. 672 01:01:28,393 --> 01:01:32,187 He'll recommend that the President continues our policy of oil dependency, 673 01:01:32,313 --> 01:01:36,316 and more dollars for subsidising nuclear power, as I've recommended myself. 674 01:01:36,442 --> 01:01:41,029 We'll have more on the dinner later and an update on the escaped zoo animals. 675 01:01:41,155 --> 01:01:46,201 This is the most important evening of my career. We can't afford mistakes. 676 01:01:46,285 --> 01:01:49,913 If you see Drebin or any Police Squad near these premises, 677 01:01:49,997 --> 01:01:52,207 I want them arrested on sight. 678 01:01:54,794 --> 01:01:57,713 I told Jane to meet us at the hotel's rear entrance. 679 01:01:57,839 --> 01:02:00,048 - Where's that? - In the back. 680 01:02:00,133 --> 01:02:02,592 She'll unlock the doors at 7:30. 681 01:02:02,677 --> 01:02:06,304 - What about Hapsburg? - Hopefully, she can stay clear of him. 682 01:02:06,389 --> 01:02:08,432 Let's go. 683 01:02:23,948 --> 01:02:26,867 Why, Jane! 684 01:02:26,951 --> 01:02:30,579 What are you doing out here? The party's inside. 685 01:02:30,663 --> 01:02:35,667 Quentin! I was just getting a breath of fresh air. 686 01:02:39,213 --> 01:02:42,424 I grew up on Lake Erie. There's nothing quite like it. 687 01:02:42,508 --> 01:02:45,010 Well, I'm quite sure... 688 01:02:45,094 --> 01:02:50,182 But how fortunate to have found you. Now you can join me at my table. 689 01:03:00,818 --> 01:03:04,696 Jane! Something must have happened to Jane. 690 01:03:04,822 --> 01:03:06,615 Bernardo, you've got the keys? 691 01:03:10,077 --> 01:03:13,288 I have a better idea. Follow me! 692 01:03:13,372 --> 01:03:17,793 Your attention, please. Ladies and gentlemen. 693 01:03:17,877 --> 01:03:20,837 Thousand points of... Light. Light, a thousand points of light. 694 01:03:20,922 --> 01:03:25,967 Recession... Bad. Recovery... Good. Yeah, I think I've got that. 695 01:03:26,052 --> 01:03:31,014 Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States. 696 01:04:03,798 --> 01:04:05,090 Bésame 697 01:04:06,425 --> 01:04:11,221 Bésame mucho... 698 01:04:11,347 --> 01:04:17,727 Each time I cling to your kiss I hear music divine 699 01:04:19,397 --> 01:04:24,276 Bésame mucho 700 01:04:27,029 --> 01:04:33,577 Hold me, my darling and say that you'll always be mine 701 01:04:33,661 --> 01:04:35,787 We'd better make our move. 702 01:04:35,872 --> 01:04:40,292 Yeah, I'm thinking about something more up-tempo, like Guantanamera. 703 01:04:40,376 --> 01:04:44,713 No, I mean Hacker! He's getting ready to make a speech. 704 01:04:44,797 --> 01:04:47,799 Right! I'll intercept Hacker. 705 01:04:47,884 --> 01:04:50,302 You get the doctor prepared for his speech. 706 01:05:07,236 --> 01:05:10,780 Bravo! Encore! 707 01:05:18,497 --> 01:05:20,248 Ladies and gentlemen... 708 01:05:20,333 --> 01:05:22,834 - Dr Meinheimer. - Yes? 709 01:05:23,169 --> 01:05:26,504 - Or should I say Hacker? - Drebin! 710 01:05:30,593 --> 01:05:32,385 Look what he's doing to that man in the wheelchair! 711 01:05:33,387 --> 01:05:37,724 - Can't someone help? - Come on, guys. Let's get him! 712 01:05:37,850 --> 01:05:41,353 - Give me a shot at him! - Beating a guy in a wheelchair, huh? 713 01:05:41,479 --> 01:05:45,357 - We'd better get this man first aid. - Sit tight, mister. 714 01:05:46,692 --> 01:05:48,360 Thank you. 715 01:05:48,444 --> 01:05:54,199 I'm pleased and honoured to be with you tonight on this historic occasion. 716 01:05:54,325 --> 01:05:58,036 Tonight, Dr Meinheimer, as he looks up to the future, 717 01:05:58,120 --> 01:06:01,957 no doubt realises how our dependence on foreign oil 718 01:06:02,041 --> 01:06:04,167 has put a stranglehold on the budget. 719 01:06:04,627 --> 01:06:09,255 A lot of cuts will have to be made and some people will be hit hard. 720 01:06:09,382 --> 01:06:11,967 But we'll just keep cutting until we have an impact. 721 01:06:13,052 --> 01:06:16,221 That's the only way we'll be able to move forward. 722 01:06:16,389 --> 01:06:20,558 Now I present to you Dr Albert S. Meinheimer. 723 01:06:36,075 --> 01:06:39,285 Oh, my God! He can walk! 724 01:06:39,370 --> 01:06:41,830 He can walk! It's a miracle! 725 01:06:45,084 --> 01:06:48,253 I can walk! 726 01:06:48,337 --> 01:06:49,921 Get off me, you moron! 727 01:06:53,342 --> 01:06:56,636 Hey, come back here! 728 01:06:56,721 --> 01:07:01,683 Everything seems to be okay now, so without further ado, 729 01:07:01,767 --> 01:07:05,895 I present to you, once again, the man who needs no introduction, 730 01:07:06,022 --> 01:07:10,775 the esteemed Dr Albert S. Meinheimer. 731 01:07:23,622 --> 01:07:25,832 Hold it! Hold everything! 732 01:07:26,625 --> 01:07:29,210 - Don't listen to him. He's a fraud! - No! 733 01:07:29,295 --> 01:07:32,255 - I can prove it! - What are you doing? 734 01:07:32,339 --> 01:07:34,841 The real doctor has a birthmark 735 01:07:34,925 --> 01:07:37,969 in the shape of Whistler's Mother right here! 736 01:07:44,685 --> 01:07:48,563 Obviously a forgery. We'll see about this! 737 01:07:51,776 --> 01:07:52,817 Drebin! 738 01:08:09,835 --> 01:08:15,799 Hold it! Frank is right. There is a fraud in this room, but it's this man! 739 01:08:18,636 --> 01:08:22,514 And he's just given us this signed confession, implicating that man! 740 01:08:27,853 --> 01:08:30,355 No, no, no... 741 01:08:30,689 --> 01:08:32,357 That man. Quentin Hapsburg. 742 01:08:35,653 --> 01:08:38,321 - They're gone! - Let's go! 743 01:08:46,831 --> 01:08:49,249 - Let me go! - The roof. 744 01:08:50,417 --> 01:08:53,670 Come on, Frank, hurry! Come on! 745 01:09:01,595 --> 01:09:04,305 Tonight, I intend to share with you my report 746 01:09:04,390 --> 01:09:06,850 on our need for a national policy 747 01:09:06,976 --> 01:09:10,979 based on energy efficiency and clean, renewable energy sources. 748 01:09:18,529 --> 01:09:19,863 Over there! 749 01:09:19,947 --> 01:09:21,948 Frank! 750 01:09:23,701 --> 01:09:24,701 Take cover! 751 01:09:25,578 --> 01:09:26,578 Frank! 752 01:10:08,787 --> 01:10:12,790 Nordberg! Cover me, I'm going in! 753 01:10:40,653 --> 01:10:46,074 All right. Where's Hapsburg? 754 01:10:46,200 --> 01:10:48,201 - Where are you hit? - It's not that. 755 01:10:48,744 --> 01:10:52,080 - You're on my groin. - Oh, sorry. 756 01:10:52,206 --> 01:10:54,999 - Where is he? - You're too late. 757 01:10:55,709 --> 01:10:58,503 Hapsburg has Plan B in... 758 01:10:58,754 --> 01:11:01,089 In... In... 759 01:11:02,007 --> 01:11:05,176 Where, where? All right. 760 01:11:05,511 --> 01:11:08,346 Who else is almost dead? 761 01:11:09,890 --> 01:11:12,100 Okay, now... 762 01:11:13,185 --> 01:11:16,104 - Talk! - You're too late, Drebin. 763 01:11:16,188 --> 01:11:18,773 - He already said that. - Where did he leave off? 764 01:11:19,191 --> 01:11:22,318 "Hapsburg has Plan B in... " 765 01:11:22,528 --> 01:11:26,614 Oh, yeah. Hapsburg has Plan B in... 766 01:11:26,699 --> 01:11:29,409 - In... - Where? 767 01:11:29,535 --> 01:11:32,370 Where? Talk, you low-life scum! 768 01:11:33,163 --> 01:11:36,582 Gee, if that's your attitude, forget it! 769 01:11:40,087 --> 01:11:42,672 I'm right here, Drebin. 770 01:11:45,801 --> 01:11:47,385 Drop your gun, Lieutenant. 771 01:11:51,557 --> 01:11:55,393 I believe you're inquiring about Plan B. 772 01:11:56,061 --> 01:11:59,647 That's where we detonate a small nuclear device. 773 01:11:59,815 --> 01:12:03,318 Your Dr Meinheimer can talk all he wants. 774 01:12:03,402 --> 01:12:05,820 No one will be left alive to hear it. 775 01:12:05,904 --> 01:12:07,572 Detonation sequence activated. 776 01:12:08,115 --> 01:12:11,659 I'm the only one who knows the abort code. 777 01:12:11,744 --> 01:12:14,996 In 10 minutes, this building and everyone in it 778 01:12:15,080 --> 01:12:17,665 will be reduced to a pile of rubble. 779 01:12:17,833 --> 01:12:20,084 I'll be safely on my helicopter. 780 01:12:20,586 --> 01:12:24,714 By this time tomorrow, I'll be hunting rhino in Botswana. 781 01:12:24,840 --> 01:12:27,175 What do you think of that? 782 01:12:27,259 --> 01:12:30,678 You certainly seem to be in touch with your anger. 783 01:12:31,764 --> 01:12:35,308 I don't care what you think. You won't talk your way out of this. 784 01:12:35,434 --> 01:12:39,103 Go ahead! Threaten me like you have the American people for so long. 785 01:12:39,188 --> 01:12:42,273 But it won't work this time. You're part of a dying breed, 786 01:12:42,399 --> 01:12:47,236 like people who can name all 50 states. The truth hurts, doesn't it? 787 01:12:47,363 --> 01:12:50,948 Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with the seat missing, 788 01:12:51,033 --> 01:12:52,450 but it hurts. 789 01:12:52,576 --> 01:12:54,952 That's as far as you go, Drebin. 790 01:12:55,037 --> 01:12:57,622 Any final requests, Lieutenant? 791 01:12:57,706 --> 01:13:00,583 Yes. Can I have the gun? 792 01:13:01,460 --> 01:13:05,213 Oh, no. I'm not going to fall for that one. 793 01:13:05,422 --> 01:13:06,422 Not so fast! 794 01:13:22,898 --> 01:13:25,525 Six minutes to detonation. 795 01:13:26,110 --> 01:13:30,071 - All right, talk! Give me that abort code. - Okay, I'll talk. 796 01:13:30,155 --> 01:13:33,825 - Six numbers, two, one, seven... - I'm coming, Frank! 797 01:13:37,371 --> 01:13:38,871 Thanks a lot. 798 01:13:55,389 --> 01:13:57,807 - Are you all right? - I'm fine. Are you okay? 799 01:13:58,016 --> 01:14:02,937 Yes, but unless we can disarm this computer, the building will blow. 800 01:14:03,063 --> 01:14:05,690 - We must warn everyone. - Yeah, right. 801 01:14:05,774 --> 01:14:11,446 - Jane, you'd better go. - No, Frank. I'm staying here with you. 802 01:14:11,530 --> 01:14:13,114 But Jane... 803 01:14:13,198 --> 01:14:17,243 If you're going to be blown to bits, I want to be here with you. 804 01:14:19,455 --> 01:14:24,459 Jane, I promise you that if we ever come out of this alive, 805 01:14:24,543 --> 01:14:28,546 I'll never let my police work interfere with our love again. 806 01:14:29,381 --> 01:14:31,883 Frank. Frank! 807 01:14:32,676 --> 01:14:35,428 The bomb. Let's go, Nordberg. 808 01:14:35,554 --> 01:14:38,097 Four minutes to detonation. 809 01:14:38,557 --> 01:14:42,059 - What are we going to do? - See what you can find in the manual. 810 01:14:42,227 --> 01:14:43,394 Let me see here... 811 01:14:43,645 --> 01:14:44,896 Oh, here we go. 812 01:14:44,980 --> 01:14:47,523 "To reset detonation code, press pound sign. " 813 01:14:49,735 --> 01:14:53,654 Per your command, the speed of this sequence has been increased. 814 01:14:54,114 --> 01:14:56,491 Detonation now in two minutes. 815 01:14:56,575 --> 01:15:02,121 So instead of spending $2.5 billion 816 01:15:02,206 --> 01:15:06,083 on research into nuclear waste disposal, 817 01:15:06,251 --> 01:15:10,505 the Federal Government, for only $500 million, 818 01:15:10,631 --> 01:15:14,008 or the cost of one B-1 bomber, 819 01:15:14,134 --> 01:15:19,764 could reduce the price of solar panels by 90%. 820 01:15:20,098 --> 01:15:24,310 As Albert Einstein once said... 821 01:15:24,436 --> 01:15:27,438 Wake up, wake up! 822 01:15:27,523 --> 01:15:30,274 Wake up, the place is going to blow! 823 01:15:30,400 --> 01:15:31,400 Wake up. 824 01:15:31,860 --> 01:15:32,860 Wake up! 825 01:15:33,153 --> 01:15:34,320 I'll get the lights. 826 01:15:37,157 --> 01:15:41,035 To elaborate on point 102... 827 01:15:41,119 --> 01:15:43,538 Here, read this. It's an emergency. 828 01:15:46,959 --> 01:15:50,294 "His strong, manly hands 829 01:15:50,420 --> 01:15:55,258 "probed every crevice of her silken femininity, 830 01:15:57,010 --> 01:16:01,055 "their undulating bodies writhing in a sensual rhythm 831 01:16:01,139 --> 01:16:04,976 "as he thrust his purple-headed warrior 832 01:16:05,143 --> 01:16:08,312 "into her quivering mound of love pudding. " 833 01:16:08,522 --> 01:16:13,317 Listen up, everyone. I want you to calmly file towards the exits. 834 01:16:13,694 --> 01:16:18,781 That's it. Nobody run. Just walk, single file. 835 01:16:18,865 --> 01:16:22,034 That's it. If we'll just stay calm, 836 01:16:22,160 --> 01:16:25,997 no one will be harmed by the huge bomb that's going to explode. 837 01:16:33,630 --> 01:16:36,632 It's a cookbook, it's a cookbook! 838 01:16:38,051 --> 01:16:40,303 Twenty seconds to detonation. 839 01:16:42,598 --> 01:16:44,265 - What are you going to do? - Fifteen seconds. 840 01:16:46,184 --> 01:16:48,227 - It's got my sleeve! - Oh, no! 841 01:16:48,312 --> 01:16:50,354 10, 9, 8... 842 01:16:50,606 --> 01:16:53,816 - I can't get it. - Jane, my jacket! 843 01:16:54,192 --> 01:16:57,111 5, 4, 3... 844 01:16:58,155 --> 01:17:00,156 -2, 1... - Let's get out! 845 01:17:04,202 --> 01:17:05,536 Frank, look! 846 01:17:07,664 --> 01:17:10,082 You did it! 847 01:17:18,884 --> 01:17:22,762 Thank you, Mr President, for those kind words, 848 01:17:22,888 --> 01:17:25,640 but it's all part of the job. 849 01:17:25,766 --> 01:17:29,810 Frank, I'd like you to consider filling a special post I'm going to create. 850 01:17:30,062 --> 01:17:33,064 It may mean long hours, dangerous nights, 851 01:17:33,231 --> 01:17:37,401 and being surrounded by some of the scummiest elements in our society. 852 01:17:37,569 --> 01:17:40,529 You want me to be in your cabinet? 853 01:17:40,697 --> 01:17:43,491 No... No! 854 01:17:43,617 --> 01:17:48,788 I want you to head up a new Federal Bureau of Police Squad. 855 01:17:52,084 --> 01:17:55,586 - That's a great honour. - It's what you've always wanted. 856 01:17:55,921 --> 01:17:57,171 Congratulations. 857 01:17:57,714 --> 01:17:59,382 Nice going! 858 01:17:59,925 --> 01:18:04,428 - Get in here. - Thank you, Mr President. 859 01:18:05,722 --> 01:18:08,683 Thank you. I'm very honoured. 860 01:18:08,767 --> 01:18:10,893 This is something I've always dreamt of, 861 01:18:10,977 --> 01:18:16,273 but I'll have to turn down your offer. 862 01:18:17,067 --> 01:18:20,611 You see, I've learnt something this past week 863 01:18:20,696 --> 01:18:23,739 about the Earth and about love. 864 01:18:24,783 --> 01:18:27,576 I guess love is like the ozone layer. 865 01:18:27,703 --> 01:18:30,538 You never miss it until it's gone. 866 01:18:31,123 --> 01:18:35,126 Blowing away a fleeing suspect with my. 44 Magnum 867 01:18:35,293 --> 01:18:39,547 used to be everything to me. I enjoyed it. Who wouldn't? 868 01:18:41,216 --> 01:18:46,637 But now I want to be known as "The Environmental Police Lieutenant". 869 01:18:50,267 --> 01:18:55,521 I want a world where Frank Junior, and all the Frank Juniors, 870 01:18:55,647 --> 01:18:57,732 can sit under a shade tree, 871 01:18:57,858 --> 01:19:01,152 breathe the air, swim in the ocean, 872 01:19:01,278 --> 01:19:04,530 and go into a 7-Eleven without an interpreter. 873 01:19:11,121 --> 01:19:14,540 I want a world where I can eat a sea otter without getting sick. 874 01:19:16,334 --> 01:19:21,756 I want a world where the Democrats have a candidate worth voting for. 875 01:19:24,718 --> 01:19:28,679 I may not get there with you, but most of all, 876 01:19:28,805 --> 01:19:32,349 I want a world where I can wake up each morning 877 01:19:32,476 --> 01:19:35,436 with this woman, whom I love! 878 01:19:38,482 --> 01:19:40,024 Yikes! 879 01:19:40,358 --> 01:19:42,485 - Frank! - Jane! 880 01:19:42,986 --> 01:19:44,528 Frank! Frank! 881 01:19:44,863 --> 01:19:48,908 - Jane, will you marry me? - Yes, of course I'll marry you! 882 01:19:53,997 --> 01:19:57,666 We love Frank! We love Frank! 883 01:19:57,751 --> 01:20:00,795 One more picture. Turn around, over here! 884 01:20:00,879 --> 01:20:02,546 Smile! 885 01:20:07,052 --> 01:20:11,347 Help, George! 886 01:24:27,062 --> 01:24:29,938 All right, let's see if I got this straight, now. 887 01:24:30,065 --> 01:24:33,150 Energy efficiency, good. 888 01:24:33,443 --> 01:24:37,988 Drilling in Arctic national wildlife refuge, bad. 889 01:24:38,865 --> 01:24:41,658 Mr President, is everything okay in there? 890 01:24:41,826 --> 01:24:44,411 I'm fine, thanks.