1 00:00:01,975 --> 00:00:02,808 Oh for the -- 2 00:00:03,376 --> 00:00:05,877 We're already late, what'd ya go and start that for? 3 00:00:05,945 --> 00:00:07,179 I didn't! 4 00:00:07,247 --> 00:00:09,948 So, it just spontaneously combusted. 5 00:00:10,016 --> 00:00:13,485 So creepy... look, I've got goosebumps. 6 00:00:13,553 --> 00:00:14,586 I'm sure you do. 7 00:00:14,654 --> 00:00:16,821 What is -- is something burning?! 8 00:00:16,889 --> 00:00:17,622 No! 9 00:00:17,690 --> 00:00:18,924 Maybe you're having a stroke! 10 00:00:18,991 --> 00:00:20,426 I'm not having a stroke! 11 00:00:20,493 --> 00:00:23,395 That's great, Mother, keep those periodic updates coming! 12 00:00:23,463 --> 00:00:24,263 Oh shut up. 13 00:00:24,330 --> 00:00:26,065 Hey, Friday happy hour, you guys in? 14 00:00:26,132 --> 00:00:26,665 Gimme that. 15 00:00:26,732 --> 00:00:29,935 No no no no no that's not -- 16 00:00:30,002 --> 00:00:30,669 -- water. 17 00:00:30,736 --> 00:00:32,003 Well what the hell was it?! 18 00:00:32,072 --> 00:00:33,038 Grappa. 19 00:00:33,106 --> 00:00:35,874 - Aww... - No shit, that was like twenty bucks' worth. 20 00:00:35,942 --> 00:00:37,276 Who drinks a pint of grappa?! 21 00:00:37,343 --> 00:00:39,678 Well nobody now, Wendy Wasteful. 22 00:00:39,745 --> 00:00:41,480 So you can buy my first couple of rounds. 23 00:00:41,548 --> 00:00:43,715 - Nah, I can't, we -- - No, you can. 24 00:00:43,783 --> 00:00:44,983 I'm allowing you. 25 00:00:45,051 --> 00:00:48,287 - Oh my God, thank you - You're welcome. 26 00:00:48,354 --> 00:00:49,588 but we've got dates. 27 00:00:49,655 --> 00:00:51,523 Meaning the fruit of the date palm? 28 00:00:51,591 --> 00:00:52,591 Muh-huh. 29 00:00:52,658 --> 00:00:54,560 Date dates, dingdong. 30 00:00:54,627 --> 00:00:55,294 With who? 31 00:00:55,361 --> 00:00:58,197 Oh, just some handsome firemen I met. 32 00:00:58,264 --> 00:00:59,264 At a warehouse fire. 33 00:00:59,332 --> 00:01:01,200 So c'mon, let's go already! 34 00:01:01,267 --> 00:01:03,168 My cooch has cobwebs on it. 35 00:01:03,236 --> 00:01:04,136 Ew. 36 00:01:04,204 --> 00:01:05,804 Krieger, hey, wanna get a drink? 37 00:01:05,871 --> 00:01:08,507 Oooooooooooooh, no. 38 00:01:08,575 --> 00:01:12,211 - It's mushi night, movie and sushi - With... oh. 39 00:01:12,278 --> 00:01:13,878 Meaning that's tentacle porn. 40 00:01:13,946 --> 00:01:15,947 "Fisherman's Wife" and "Fisherman's Wife Two:" 41 00:01:16,015 --> 00:01:17,349 "The Re-Tentacling." 42 00:01:19,519 --> 00:01:22,053 Mother, hey, wanna go get a drink? 43 00:01:22,122 --> 00:01:24,055 You know, as a matter of fact, I do. 44 00:01:24,124 --> 00:01:28,026 - Oh, okay, uh -- - And as another matter of fact, I am. 45 00:01:28,094 --> 00:01:30,429 With Ron, in the bar at The Tuntmore. 46 00:01:30,497 --> 00:01:35,867 And if he plays his cards right, he'll be wetting a lot more than his -- 47 00:01:36,769 --> 00:01:37,302 Oww! 48 00:01:37,370 --> 00:01:38,370 What is wrong with you?! 49 00:01:38,438 --> 00:01:40,139 Well for one thing, tinnitus! 50 00:01:40,206 --> 00:01:43,775 Which... Yeah, I think it's getting worse. 51 00:01:43,843 --> 00:01:46,811 And how do they all have dates, these aren't people you date, 52 00:01:46,879 --> 00:01:50,815 I'm who should have a date, I'm the... best at dates. 53 00:01:50,883 --> 00:01:53,084 Hmm, I wonder if Lana has a date. 54 00:01:53,153 --> 00:01:54,119 Yes! 55 00:01:54,187 --> 00:01:56,054 - Lana? - Yes! 56 00:01:56,122 --> 00:01:58,357 - You heard that? - Yes! 57 00:01:58,424 --> 00:01:59,758 Who're you, Jaime Sommers? 58 00:01:59,825 --> 00:02:00,459 Yes! 59 00:02:00,527 --> 00:02:03,895 No seriously, I can barely hear me, are my ears really that messed up? 60 00:02:03,963 --> 00:02:06,131 Yes! Yes! Yes! 61 00:02:06,199 --> 00:02:09,364 Okay, Jesus, I'm not deaf, I'm just -- 62 00:02:09,490 --> 00:02:11,861 Going to vomit. 63 00:02:11,904 --> 00:02:13,104 I am going to vomit. 64 00:02:13,173 --> 00:02:14,706 Not on my carpet, you're not! 65 00:02:14,774 --> 00:02:20,045 I -- Oh for God's sake, get a room! 66 00:02:20,812 --> 00:02:22,013 We did. 67 00:02:24,014 --> 00:02:28,614 Sync & corrections by Alice www.addic7ed.com 68 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:36,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 69 00:02:58,229 --> 00:03:02,949 Shut up, because first of all... I don't have to explain myself to you, 70 00:03:02,984 --> 00:03:04,768 of all people, and -- 71 00:03:04,836 --> 00:03:08,812 -- and if you blow that thing again the next time you 72 00:03:08,847 --> 00:03:12,114 hear it'll be when some whore is giving you a blow job. 73 00:03:12,183 --> 00:03:14,317 Doesn't even make sense. 74 00:03:14,385 --> 00:03:18,454 I think she means she'll shove it up your -- 75 00:03:18,522 --> 00:03:20,456 Dickhole, and where did you get that?! 76 00:03:20,524 --> 00:03:21,991 Rape prevention class. 77 00:03:22,059 --> 00:03:25,695 Which, turns out, is a not-good place to meet women. 78 00:03:25,762 --> 00:03:26,529 No shit. 79 00:03:26,597 --> 00:03:30,600 Yeah, it's like their guard is so up, it's -- Cyril, scotch, where?! 80 00:03:30,668 --> 00:03:32,802 Well if you mean my grandfather's Glengoolie Blue, 81 00:03:32,869 --> 00:03:35,271 you drank it and then puked it into my trash can! 82 00:03:35,339 --> 00:03:38,408 Oh my God, Lana I get, she wants to make me jealous, 83 00:03:38,475 --> 00:03:41,177 but are you seriously just getting me back for the scotch?! 84 00:03:41,245 --> 00:03:43,513 Do you even hear yourself? 85 00:03:43,581 --> 00:03:44,947 It honestly kinda comes and goes. 86 00:03:45,015 --> 00:03:49,018 Well, since thanks to you I didn't do the former, now we're doing the latter. 87 00:03:49,086 --> 00:03:50,553 Cyril, go start the car. 88 00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:52,689 - Are you not going-- - Cyril? 89 00:03:52,756 --> 00:03:54,624 Remember the ground rules for this? 90 00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:57,227 So carefully negotiated? 91 00:03:57,294 --> 00:03:58,994 I will go start the car. 92 00:03:59,062 --> 00:04:03,065 - And before you say it -- - How long's it been since you got laid, Lana? 93 00:04:03,133 --> 00:04:05,435 That's not why I'm dating Cyril again! 94 00:04:05,502 --> 00:04:08,705 - Uh-huh, so two -- - No! Not two years! 95 00:04:08,772 --> 00:04:11,474 Ass. 96 00:04:11,542 --> 00:04:12,742 Fourteen months. 97 00:04:12,809 --> 00:04:14,210 So go ahead, laugh. 98 00:04:14,278 --> 00:04:14,744 At what? 99 00:04:14,811 --> 00:04:16,112 I was gonna say two weeks. 100 00:04:16,179 --> 00:04:22,452 Two years is... Lana, that's the -- third saddest thing I've heard today. 101 00:04:22,519 --> 00:04:25,788 Pam told me about a little girl who drowned trying to save a puppy. 102 00:04:25,856 --> 00:04:28,691 Jesus... what was the second saddest? 103 00:04:28,759 --> 00:04:31,261 The puppy drowned too. 104 00:04:31,328 --> 00:04:36,899 But it's a close third, I mean don't do this, Lana, c'mon, I'd be happy to bang you. 105 00:04:36,967 --> 00:04:39,369 Me and anybody who could fog a mirror. 106 00:04:39,436 --> 00:04:42,772 Well before, maybe, but I really think I've changed, Ya know! 107 00:04:42,839 --> 00:04:44,173 And-or matured! 108 00:04:44,241 --> 00:04:44,940 Ha. 109 00:04:45,008 --> 00:04:50,079 No, I'm serious, with the cancer, and my possible father dying, and um... 110 00:04:50,147 --> 00:04:51,581 oh my God, the tinnitus?! 111 00:04:51,649 --> 00:04:53,516 - Archer... - Hang on, should we get that? 112 00:04:53,584 --> 00:04:54,717 Get what? 113 00:04:54,785 --> 00:04:56,852 Is the phone not...? 114 00:04:56,920 --> 00:04:59,622 Damn you, tinnitus, you're a cruel mistress! 115 00:05:00,957 --> 00:05:02,024 But seriously, do you not hear that? 116 00:05:02,092 --> 00:05:03,259 Yes, now! 117 00:05:03,327 --> 00:05:04,093 It's your phone! 118 00:05:04,161 --> 00:05:06,162 Oh. Duh. 119 00:05:06,229 --> 00:05:10,366 Wait please, Lana, c'mon, you can't deny we're attracted to each other! 120 00:05:10,434 --> 00:05:11,000 So?! 121 00:05:11,067 --> 00:05:13,969 So what if all that stuff really has matured me? 122 00:05:14,037 --> 00:05:16,639 I know I'm not perfect, but you have to admit I'm better! 123 00:05:16,707 --> 00:05:17,407 Than? 124 00:05:17,474 --> 00:05:19,208 Than I was! 125 00:05:19,276 --> 00:05:21,177 And also than Cyril could ever be. 126 00:05:21,244 --> 00:05:25,181 - First of all, Cyril -- - Cheated on you as much as I did, Lana, 127 00:05:25,248 --> 00:05:28,718 - and I'm ten times handsomer than him, so... - They're the same! 128 00:05:28,786 --> 00:05:31,020 Lana, be honest with yourself. 129 00:05:31,087 --> 00:05:33,055 It was actually about ten times worse. 130 00:05:34,257 --> 00:05:36,459 What happened to your idiot voicemail?! 131 00:05:36,527 --> 00:05:41,197 I'm doing this new thing, where now it just rings, drives people crazy. 132 00:05:41,264 --> 00:05:43,833 - Oh my God, you have matured... - Lana, I have! 133 00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:45,000 Just let me prove it! 134 00:05:45,068 --> 00:05:45,635 If. 135 00:05:45,703 --> 00:05:49,439 In some crazy parallel universe I agreed to that. 136 00:05:49,506 --> 00:05:50,573 How would you. 137 00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:55,645 By -- Jesus, hang on, Woodhouse might be trapped in the dumbwaiter again. 138 00:05:55,713 --> 00:05:57,146 He was in there two days last time. 139 00:05:57,214 --> 00:05:59,615 Your apartment's one level, how do you have a dumbwaiter? 140 00:05:59,683 --> 00:06:01,116 Goes sideways. 141 00:06:01,184 --> 00:06:02,885 Mmmmmmmmyello? 142 00:06:02,953 --> 00:06:04,554 Speaking. 143 00:06:04,621 --> 00:06:05,855 Uh-huh. 144 00:06:05,922 --> 00:06:07,757 Uh-huh. 145 00:06:07,825 --> 00:06:09,625 Uh-huh. 146 00:06:09,693 --> 00:06:10,827 Uh-huh. 147 00:06:10,894 --> 00:06:12,562 Uh-huh. 148 00:06:12,629 --> 00:06:14,230 Okay, bye. 149 00:06:14,297 --> 00:06:15,465 Yes! 150 00:06:15,532 --> 00:06:17,700 Okay, Lana, check you later. 151 00:06:17,768 --> 00:06:18,668 What? 152 00:06:18,736 --> 00:06:20,002 What about all that just now? 153 00:06:20,070 --> 00:06:21,036 All what just now? 154 00:06:21,104 --> 00:06:23,939 About how much you've matured, and how you want to get back together? 155 00:06:24,007 --> 00:06:24,974 That's what you heard? 156 00:06:25,041 --> 00:06:27,543 Wow, your ears are even worse than mine. 157 00:06:27,611 --> 00:06:29,712 Wait, was that even Woodhouse? 158 00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:30,446 Nooop! 159 00:06:30,514 --> 00:06:32,548 Then who was it?! 160 00:06:35,352 --> 00:06:40,490 Yes, my dear Sterling, come for me. 161 00:06:40,557 --> 00:06:42,725 Phrezzing, boom. 162 00:06:50,648 --> 00:06:53,417 Hey, asshole! 163 00:06:59,824 --> 00:07:00,691 Thanks. 164 00:07:00,759 --> 00:07:03,361 And oh, my name is Cyril Figgis. 165 00:07:28,772 --> 00:07:32,141 Hey, how's it going? 166 00:07:32,208 --> 00:07:34,543 Thenk you, they are beautiful. 167 00:07:34,611 --> 00:07:38,714 Sorry about the chocolate, I didn't know you were allergic or whatever. 168 00:07:38,782 --> 00:07:39,915 The alkaloids. 169 00:07:39,983 --> 00:07:42,551 They can make a problem with my bioelectronics. 170 00:07:42,619 --> 00:07:44,020 Oh. Right. 171 00:07:44,087 --> 00:07:45,287 Because you have those. 172 00:07:45,355 --> 00:07:47,222 And I'm sorry if you misunderstood. 173 00:07:47,290 --> 00:07:49,391 I did not call you for the romance. 174 00:07:49,459 --> 00:07:55,497 I -- yeah I mean yeah, no, duh, and besides I wouldn't 175 00:07:55,565 --> 00:07:58,167 be interested, I have a girlfriend, so. 176 00:07:58,234 --> 00:07:58,901 Oh. 177 00:07:58,969 --> 00:08:00,636 Yeah, an actress. 178 00:08:00,704 --> 00:08:03,105 Of stage and screen. 179 00:08:03,173 --> 00:08:03,806 Oh. 180 00:08:03,874 --> 00:08:05,941 Well, I hope she makes you happy. 181 00:08:06,009 --> 00:08:09,244 Is funny, you don't ask where is Barry. 182 00:08:09,312 --> 00:08:13,482 What do you mean where is Barry, he's -- Yeah, where is Barry? 183 00:08:13,550 --> 00:08:19,421 I... I don't know! 184 00:08:19,489 --> 00:08:23,993 And only one week after, well, you know, when I left you for him, 185 00:08:24,061 --> 00:08:26,628 he said he must go for work, to London. 186 00:08:26,697 --> 00:08:30,332 - Wow, that was months ago... - And since then, nothing! 187 00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:32,968 Not a word! 188 00:08:33,036 --> 00:08:35,204 What could have happened to him?! 189 00:08:35,271 --> 00:08:39,675 - Uhhh... - Noooooooooooooooooooo! 190 00:08:39,743 --> 00:08:41,443 He is on space station?! 191 00:08:41,511 --> 00:08:42,211 But why?! 192 00:08:42,278 --> 00:08:46,916 Well, ya know, I hate to say this, but obviously he met someone else. 193 00:08:46,983 --> 00:08:48,450 Sterling. Pliz. 194 00:08:48,518 --> 00:08:52,054 Yeah, that was the -- third dumbest thing I've ever said. 195 00:08:52,122 --> 00:08:54,356 Wait, what were the first two? 196 00:08:54,424 --> 00:08:58,227 Buddy, you just sold a timeshare! 197 00:08:58,294 --> 00:09:01,163 Make that two timeshares! 198 00:09:01,231 --> 00:09:05,167 - Goddamn maintenance fees... - Sterling, will you please help me find him? 199 00:09:05,235 --> 00:09:05,667 How? 200 00:09:05,736 --> 00:09:07,536 That office was just a trailer. 201 00:09:07,604 --> 00:09:08,570 Barry. 202 00:09:08,638 --> 00:09:10,740 Oh. Barry, right. 203 00:09:10,807 --> 00:09:12,641 Pliz, Sterling. 204 00:09:12,709 --> 00:09:20,816 If you ever truly loved me, you will help Barry to come home to me. 205 00:09:20,884 --> 00:09:22,752 'kay. 206 00:09:22,819 --> 00:09:25,755 Okay, lemme get this straight... You wanna help psycho 207 00:09:25,822 --> 00:09:29,859 cyborg supervillain Barry, who's trapped in space like General frickin Zod, 208 00:09:29,926 --> 00:09:32,494 get back to earth so she'll dump him for you? 209 00:09:32,562 --> 00:09:33,095 Right? 210 00:09:33,163 --> 00:09:35,731 When Barry gets back she'll realize what a dick he is, 211 00:09:35,799 --> 00:09:40,669 so she'll need somebody to talk to, so enter Sterling Archer, the sensitive friend! 212 00:09:40,737 --> 00:09:42,437 What is this, Opposite World? 213 00:09:42,505 --> 00:09:44,774 Yeah, right? 214 00:09:44,841 --> 00:09:47,777 Oh for -- this is not Opposite World. 215 00:09:47,844 --> 00:09:50,579 - I think in her mind that mean - God, okay! 216 00:09:50,647 --> 00:09:52,381 This is Opposite World! 217 00:09:52,448 --> 00:09:53,282 Whew! 218 00:09:53,349 --> 00:09:55,517 Um, okay, and since certain people around 219 00:09:55,585 --> 00:09:57,753 here may not see how brilliant my plan is, 220 00:09:57,821 --> 00:09:59,354 - they're gonna need to be -- Convinced? 221 00:09:59,422 --> 00:10:02,258 I'm sorry, did you say incapacitated? 222 00:10:02,325 --> 00:10:05,795 - Because, Krieger, I can't have the-- - Responsible people? 223 00:10:05,862 --> 00:10:07,029 Naysayers! 224 00:10:07,097 --> 00:10:10,132 Walk in on you while you're helping Barry build a rocket! 225 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:12,434 Barry The Unstoppable Psycho-Cyborg. 226 00:10:12,502 --> 00:10:14,203 He's not unstoppable anymore! 227 00:10:14,271 --> 00:10:16,872 Ray's got bionic legs! 228 00:10:16,940 --> 00:10:20,109 But if you don't wanna see two robots smashing each other with 229 00:10:20,177 --> 00:10:24,513 cop cars and shit as they fight to the death through the streets of Manhattan... 230 00:10:24,580 --> 00:10:25,681 Bup bup bup bup bup! 231 00:10:25,748 --> 00:10:27,349 Stop. 232 00:10:27,417 --> 00:10:29,751 My penis can only get so erect. 233 00:10:29,820 --> 00:10:32,188 HOLOGRAM: Honntou ne... [Very true...] 234 00:10:32,255 --> 00:10:33,622 I was tired! 235 00:10:33,690 --> 00:10:34,957 Ew. 236 00:10:42,165 --> 00:10:43,432 Cyril? 237 00:10:43,499 --> 00:10:44,033 What. 238 00:10:45,735 --> 00:10:49,471 Ew. 239 00:10:49,539 --> 00:10:51,040 Ray? 240 00:10:51,107 --> 00:10:51,640 What. 241 00:10:53,310 --> 00:10:55,577 Seriously, how is that even a genre? 242 00:10:55,645 --> 00:10:57,279 And is this just jackoff central? 243 00:10:57,347 --> 00:10:59,748 Ugh, not with all this damn racket! 244 00:10:59,816 --> 00:11:01,483 Wh-? Why aren't you in position?! 245 00:11:01,551 --> 00:11:03,518 I am, this is how I do it! 246 00:11:03,586 --> 00:11:04,553 Wh-? Ewww! 247 00:11:04,620 --> 00:11:05,821 I meant with Mother! 248 00:11:05,889 --> 00:11:06,621 Oh. 249 00:11:06,689 --> 00:11:07,957 I put Cheryl on that. 250 00:11:08,024 --> 00:11:10,292 Great, Miss Opposite World?! 251 00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:12,962 You heard me, do not go in there. 252 00:11:13,029 --> 00:11:14,629 Why, what are you hiding this time? 253 00:11:14,697 --> 00:11:18,234 Probably another one of her so-called mystery fires. 254 00:11:18,301 --> 00:11:23,005 Lana, I said no! 255 00:11:23,073 --> 00:11:27,343 Okay, so where's the... fire. 256 00:11:30,780 --> 00:11:32,848 Worst. Day. Evah! 257 00:11:32,916 --> 00:11:33,949 Okay status report! 258 00:11:34,017 --> 00:11:35,117 Mother in there? 259 00:11:35,185 --> 00:11:35,751 No. 260 00:11:35,818 --> 00:11:37,452 Carol, open this damn door! 261 00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:40,655 - Um, okay, now I just need to find - Cheryl! 262 00:11:40,723 --> 00:11:41,823 And neither is Lana. 263 00:11:41,892 --> 00:11:42,657 Nice! 264 00:11:42,725 --> 00:11:47,396 Hey excellent job, seriously-- Ow! I mean... totally shit job? 265 00:11:47,463 --> 00:11:48,097 Cheryl! 266 00:11:48,164 --> 00:11:48,898 Thank you. 267 00:11:48,965 --> 00:11:52,134 - So when I said this is Opposite World -- - Pam. 268 00:11:52,202 --> 00:11:54,303 The important thing is that I'm happy. 269 00:11:54,371 --> 00:11:56,671 Try not to overthink it. 270 00:11:56,739 --> 00:11:59,808 I just wanna help you finish your new spaceship, why is that weird? 271 00:11:59,876 --> 00:12:02,912 Why is that weird -- Because my sworn purpose in life is to murder your 272 00:12:02,979 --> 00:12:03,946 little buddy Archer? 273 00:12:04,014 --> 00:12:04,646 Archer? 274 00:12:04,714 --> 00:12:07,349 No way man, I hate that guy! 275 00:12:07,417 --> 00:12:08,017 Since when? 276 00:12:08,084 --> 00:12:11,086 Since, um, he slept with my girlfriend! 277 00:12:11,154 --> 00:12:13,755 Dattara iinoni... [I wish.] 278 00:12:13,823 --> 00:12:14,390 Keep it up. 279 00:12:14,457 --> 00:12:15,991 God, that is just classic Archer! 280 00:12:16,059 --> 00:12:16,725 Right? 281 00:12:16,793 --> 00:12:19,828 I mean, not a huge surprise, from a self-centered alcoholic 282 00:12:19,896 --> 00:12:21,680 who feels compelled to sleep with every woman 283 00:12:21,706 --> 00:12:23,257 he meets because that's the only way to 284 00:12:23,300 --> 00:12:25,834 fill the emptiness inside where his mother's love should -- ow! 285 00:12:25,902 --> 00:12:27,269 Do what? 286 00:12:27,337 --> 00:12:28,804 One sec? 287 00:12:28,871 --> 00:12:29,704 What the shit?! 288 00:12:29,772 --> 00:12:32,207 What, you said be convin-- Convincing! 289 00:12:32,275 --> 00:12:33,542 Not deliberately hurtful! 290 00:12:33,609 --> 00:12:34,443 Well?! 291 00:12:34,510 --> 00:12:35,477 Yo, asshole! 292 00:12:35,545 --> 00:12:36,611 What're we doing here? 293 00:12:36,679 --> 00:12:38,314 Fixing that spaceship, buddy! 294 00:12:38,381 --> 00:12:40,549 Looks like it's just about done, huh? 295 00:12:40,616 --> 00:12:44,219 Yeah, those scientists were pretty resourceful. 296 00:12:44,287 --> 00:12:45,620 Until they all died. 297 00:12:45,688 --> 00:12:49,158 And how did they, um, all die? 298 00:12:49,225 --> 00:12:52,294 Oh... different ways. 299 00:12:52,362 --> 00:12:53,662 'kay. 300 00:12:53,729 --> 00:12:55,064 Swift and severe. 301 00:12:55,131 --> 00:12:58,800 The punishment will be swift and severe. 302 00:12:58,868 --> 00:13:01,636 I mean it, Lana, that girl is out of here. 303 00:13:01,704 --> 00:13:05,474 Aww, and right when she was gonna invest ten million dollars in ISIS. 304 00:13:05,541 --> 00:13:06,675 She said that?! 305 00:13:06,742 --> 00:13:10,145 Oh my God, that phony prospectus must've worked! 306 00:13:10,213 --> 00:13:11,947 Do you think the money's in here?! 307 00:13:12,015 --> 00:13:14,216 Come on, help me look in these boxes! 308 00:13:14,284 --> 00:13:14,816 Malory! 309 00:13:14,884 --> 00:13:16,018 What?! 310 00:13:16,086 --> 00:13:17,519 Oh. 311 00:13:17,587 --> 00:13:18,620 Dammit. 312 00:13:18,688 --> 00:13:22,591 So yeah... Krieger's helping Barry finish his rocketship, 313 00:13:22,658 --> 00:13:26,161 and when he gets home he can... tell you about the other woman. 314 00:13:26,229 --> 00:13:26,828 The what?! 315 00:13:26,896 --> 00:13:28,530 Wait, how'd we get to another woman? 316 00:13:28,598 --> 00:13:31,166 Oh my God, do you have proof of this?! 317 00:13:31,234 --> 00:13:35,804 - No, I -- can probably get some... - Oh, Sterling! 318 00:13:35,872 --> 00:13:40,142 - If Barry really is cheating on me... - And also if I prove it somehow... 319 00:13:40,210 --> 00:13:41,877 Then he will be dead to me! 320 00:13:41,944 --> 00:13:45,814 Because I will kill him with my bare hands! 321 00:13:45,882 --> 00:13:51,286 Yeah, or not, since then there's no reason for him to come home at all! 322 00:13:51,354 --> 00:13:52,054 What's that? 323 00:13:52,122 --> 00:13:53,355 Nothing, what? 324 00:13:53,423 --> 00:13:55,524 Oh, you mean that? 325 00:13:55,591 --> 00:13:58,960 Sorry, that's... just a sympathy boner. 326 00:14:04,755 --> 00:14:05,988 Oww! 327 00:14:06,056 --> 00:14:06,956 Woooo! 328 00:14:07,023 --> 00:14:09,459 Cyril Figgis strikes again! 329 00:14:18,359 --> 00:14:19,192 Status report! 330 00:14:19,260 --> 00:14:20,294 Terrible! 331 00:14:20,361 --> 00:14:22,562 Wait, what hap -- goddammit! 332 00:14:22,630 --> 00:14:23,496 What?! 333 00:14:23,564 --> 00:14:24,864 Dude, assimilate! 334 00:14:24,933 --> 00:14:27,334 Are Mother and Lana still in the vault? 335 00:14:27,402 --> 00:14:28,001 No. 336 00:14:28,069 --> 00:14:29,702 I -- rrgh! 337 00:14:29,770 --> 00:14:33,307 A situation, by the way, for which I blame you entirely. 338 00:14:33,374 --> 00:14:35,142 How is this my fault?! 339 00:14:35,209 --> 00:14:39,379 You were the -- holy shit, there really are nerve gas canisters up here! 340 00:14:39,447 --> 00:14:41,114 I thought that was a joke! 341 00:14:41,182 --> 00:14:42,515 How is that funny? 342 00:14:42,583 --> 00:14:44,284 Because I said so. 343 00:14:44,352 --> 00:14:45,552 What's this even written on? 344 00:14:45,619 --> 00:14:47,154 A bar bill, and just do it. 345 00:14:47,221 --> 00:14:49,156 Forget about actually fixing the rocket. 346 00:14:49,223 --> 00:14:51,624 But what about the robot fight?! 347 00:14:51,692 --> 00:14:53,793 And why are you beating on shit?! 348 00:14:53,861 --> 00:14:55,429 Because shit is stuck! 349 00:14:55,496 --> 00:14:55,929 Dude! 350 00:14:55,997 --> 00:14:57,331 It's not a frickin tractor! 351 00:14:57,398 --> 00:15:00,133 Yeah, that's what all the space-nerds up here kept saying. 352 00:15:00,201 --> 00:15:03,136 Until Other Barry just couldn't stand it anymore. 353 00:15:03,204 --> 00:15:04,304 I -- Krieger! 354 00:15:04,372 --> 00:15:06,940 Forget the robot fight and just read the damn script! 355 00:15:07,008 --> 00:15:09,609 Then upload the audio to the mainframe! 356 00:15:09,677 --> 00:15:11,578 Okay, either Barry! 357 00:15:11,645 --> 00:15:14,547 I need you to find a female co-ax bus connector. 358 00:15:14,615 --> 00:15:17,817 What's a female... whatever look like? 359 00:15:17,885 --> 00:15:18,685 Pam! 360 00:15:18,752 --> 00:15:19,987 Pam! 361 00:15:20,054 --> 00:15:21,321 Paaaaaam! 362 00:15:21,389 --> 00:15:22,255 Whaaat?! 363 00:15:22,323 --> 00:15:25,425 C'mon, I need your help on -- wait, what were you doing in there? 364 00:15:25,493 --> 00:15:26,193 Nothin. 365 00:15:26,260 --> 00:15:27,660 But don't go in there! 366 00:15:27,728 --> 00:15:29,129 No, huh-uh! 367 00:15:29,197 --> 00:15:32,366 That's how Mother and Lana wound up locked in the vault! 368 00:15:32,433 --> 00:15:35,402 - A situation, by the way, for which-- I heard you! 369 00:15:35,470 --> 00:15:35,902 C'mon! 370 00:15:35,970 --> 00:15:38,305 You're still into all that stupid AV stuff, right? 371 00:15:38,373 --> 00:15:42,218 Uh... Not reeeally... 372 00:15:42,244 --> 00:15:45,904 - Okay, so screw those in... - Wait... all of 'em? 373 00:15:45,946 --> 00:15:47,580 Dammit man, I said screw! 374 00:15:47,648 --> 00:15:49,282 I am screwing! 375 00:15:49,350 --> 00:15:51,418 Wow, this might actually work. 376 00:15:51,486 --> 00:15:52,319 What's that? 377 00:15:52,387 --> 00:15:53,987 I said why not use this one. 378 00:15:54,055 --> 00:15:55,355 No! Gimme that! 379 00:15:55,423 --> 00:15:56,623 Why, what's on here? 380 00:15:56,690 --> 00:15:58,425 Nothing! Jesus! 381 00:15:58,493 --> 00:15:59,893 Christ, Ray! 382 00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:01,261 Is it too much to ask?! 383 00:16:01,329 --> 00:16:02,529 Just once?! 384 00:16:02,596 --> 00:16:07,734 To be unconscious in a bathroom without being sexually assaulted by -- you, um... 385 00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:09,136 ...have a dart in your neck. 386 00:16:09,203 --> 00:16:11,104 Oh. So do you. 387 00:16:11,172 --> 00:16:12,272 Oh. 388 00:16:12,340 --> 00:16:15,142 - Sorry I accused you of, um... - It's okay. 389 00:16:15,209 --> 00:16:17,244 C'mon, let's find our -- 390 00:16:20,081 --> 00:16:22,615 - Noooooooooooooooooooo! - Noooooooooooooooooooo! 391 00:16:22,683 --> 00:16:25,852 Yes... owww! 392 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:26,653 Will you focus?! 393 00:16:26,720 --> 00:16:28,721 That's as good as I can get it! 394 00:16:28,789 --> 00:16:29,689 Dicknuts! 395 00:16:29,757 --> 00:16:33,993 Shut up, okay, then that'll have to do, so make a tape or whatever, and -- 396 00:16:34,062 --> 00:16:37,964 So, just a quick heads up, Ms. Archer and Lana are still in the vault. 397 00:16:38,032 --> 00:16:38,932 Wh-? 398 00:16:38,999 --> 00:16:40,407 Then why are you bothering-- 399 00:16:40,433 --> 00:16:41,526 - Carol! - Cheryl! 400 00:16:42,636 --> 00:16:44,904 Pam you better not be making pornos! 401 00:16:44,972 --> 00:16:45,672 'kay! 402 00:16:45,739 --> 00:16:46,806 Tape, woman, tape! 403 00:16:46,874 --> 00:16:48,108 Okay, here! 404 00:16:48,176 --> 00:16:50,410 Dicknuts! 405 00:16:59,620 --> 00:17:02,021 I'm afraid I have some bad news. 406 00:17:02,090 --> 00:17:05,925 Now, the audio's a little rough, ya know, it's from outer space, but -- 407 00:17:05,993 --> 00:17:06,759 Sterling, pliz! 408 00:17:06,827 --> 00:17:08,095 I want to hear it. 409 00:17:08,162 --> 00:17:11,364 - Well, Katya, you say that... - Barry? 410 00:17:11,432 --> 00:17:12,932 Barry it's me, Archer. 411 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:14,334 That's not me, talking to Barry. 412 00:17:14,402 --> 00:17:14,767 Shh! 413 00:17:14,835 --> 00:17:15,635 Classic Archer! 414 00:17:15,703 --> 00:17:17,370 That's Barry, talking to-- Shhhhh! 415 00:17:17,438 --> 00:17:20,267 Yeah so listen, Katya asked me to call you... 416 00:17:20,293 --> 00:17:20,999 Shit. 417 00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:22,809 She's wondering why you left. 418 00:17:22,876 --> 00:17:25,078 Because couldn't stand it anymore. 419 00:17:25,679 --> 00:17:27,716 So you lied to her about being on 420 00:17:27,742 --> 00:17:29,874 - the space station because-- - Archer. 421 00:17:29,917 --> 00:17:31,884 I am screwing! 422 00:17:31,952 --> 00:17:32,552 Female. 423 00:17:32,620 --> 00:17:34,287 Scientists up here all of 'em? 424 00:17:34,955 --> 00:17:37,190 Oh, I was gonna ask which one but-- 425 00:17:37,196 --> 00:17:37,915 All of 'em? 426 00:17:37,958 --> 00:17:39,252 All of 'em? All of -- 427 00:17:39,259 --> 00:17:40,994 - Okay Barry, I -- - Different ways. 428 00:17:41,061 --> 00:17:41,761 Like? 429 00:17:41,829 --> 00:17:42,295 In. 430 00:17:42,363 --> 00:17:43,096 Asshole! 431 00:17:44,198 --> 00:17:45,298 Okay, Barry! 432 00:17:45,366 --> 00:17:49,336 Jesus, have some-- 433 00:17:49,403 --> 00:17:50,337 Katya, baby, don't! 434 00:17:50,404 --> 00:17:53,240 C'mon, you'll -- wait, does that even hurt your hands? 435 00:17:53,307 --> 00:17:56,676 The only thing that hurts is my heart! 436 00:17:56,744 --> 00:18:01,381 And when Barry gets back, his heart will hurt, because I will rip it out! 437 00:18:01,449 --> 00:18:04,217 What if... Barry wasn't coming back? 438 00:18:04,285 --> 00:18:06,386 But you said Krieger was fixing rocket. 439 00:18:06,454 --> 00:18:11,090 Yeah, but only because he wanted to see an epic robot fi -- oh, shit! 440 00:18:11,159 --> 00:18:12,259 Will you excuse me? 441 00:18:12,326 --> 00:18:14,060 For a sec? 442 00:18:15,863 --> 00:18:17,964 No no no no no no no no! 443 00:18:18,032 --> 00:18:19,266 Yes! 444 00:18:19,333 --> 00:18:20,600 I think that's got 'er, dude! 445 00:18:20,668 --> 00:18:22,536 Told you it was the viscous coupling! 446 00:18:22,603 --> 00:18:24,437 Well goody, you win space camp. 447 00:18:24,505 --> 00:18:29,075 So tell Archer I'm coming for him, phrasing, boom, and both Barrys out! 448 00:18:29,143 --> 00:18:30,477 Krieger! 449 00:18:30,545 --> 00:18:33,746 Why is Barry rocket-shipping away from the frickin space station?! 450 00:18:33,814 --> 00:18:36,616 Because Newton's Third Law of Motion? 451 00:18:36,684 --> 00:18:38,918 Hey thanks, Neil deGrasse Tyson! 452 00:18:38,986 --> 00:18:41,416 Oooooh, deGrasse Tyson-san... 453 00:18:41,442 --> 00:18:44,115 How the hell did you fix his ship?! 454 00:18:44,158 --> 00:18:45,559 I gave you a bunch of gibberish! 455 00:18:45,626 --> 00:18:48,628 I may have gone a teeny bit off script? 456 00:18:48,696 --> 00:18:49,229 Wh-? 457 00:18:49,297 --> 00:18:50,664 What is wrong with you?! 458 00:18:50,731 --> 00:18:51,498 With me? 459 00:18:51,566 --> 00:18:53,500 Dude, robot fight. 460 00:18:53,568 --> 00:18:56,736 - Oh, and Barry said tell you he's-- I heard him! 461 00:18:56,804 --> 00:18:58,905 Okay, I'll tell Katya to pack a bag and we'll move to, 462 00:18:58,972 --> 00:19:03,410 Alaska or somewhere else snowy, where he can't track us! 463 00:19:03,477 --> 00:19:04,544 Doesn't even make sense. 464 00:19:04,612 --> 00:19:06,746 You know what doesn't make sense?! 465 00:19:06,814 --> 00:19:09,115 The number you have dialed has been disconnected or is -- 466 00:19:09,183 --> 00:19:10,350 Nooooooooooooooooooo! 467 00:19:10,418 --> 00:19:11,851 longer in service. 468 00:19:11,919 --> 00:19:12,552 Goodbye. 469 00:19:15,456 --> 00:19:18,358 Hey, punkin pie! 470 00:19:18,426 --> 00:19:22,061 Dun't give me your pie of pumpkin, Barry, you are in the big trouble! 471 00:19:22,129 --> 00:19:23,463 - I -- - I told you! 472 00:19:23,531 --> 00:19:25,898 I said dun't try to kill Sterling and what do you do?! 473 00:19:25,966 --> 00:19:26,966 Um, that. 474 00:19:27,034 --> 00:19:27,800 Da. 475 00:19:27,868 --> 00:19:29,402 But I do what you ask me. 476 00:19:29,470 --> 00:19:33,005 To repair your rocket, I use Sterling, and once again break his heart, so -- 477 00:19:33,073 --> 00:19:34,741 Archer? Please. 478 00:19:34,808 --> 00:19:36,843 No. You pliz, he loves me. 479 00:19:36,910 --> 00:19:38,811 You should have heard thet pathetic tape. 480 00:19:38,879 --> 00:19:40,614 - Well whatever, look -- - No. You look. 481 00:19:40,681 --> 00:19:44,150 When you get home you are going to hev some new ground rules. 482 00:19:44,218 --> 00:19:45,585 Okay, hon? 483 00:19:45,653 --> 00:19:51,157 Look, I'm sorry I lied, but, ya know, I make the rules. 484 00:19:51,225 --> 00:19:55,895 - I mean, I am the head of the KGB, so-- - Hello? 485 00:19:55,963 --> 00:19:58,064 Darling, you are breaking up. 486 00:20:01,535 --> 00:20:04,871 Now who do I hev to screw to get a drink around here? 487 00:20:04,938 --> 00:20:06,239 Nobody, ma'am. 488 00:20:06,307 --> 00:20:10,310 Unless you wunt. 489 00:20:10,378 --> 00:20:14,180 And if you do wunt, I ken be buttum. 490 00:20:14,208 --> 00:20:15,880 No problum there. 491 00:20:16,278 --> 00:20:23,180 Sync & corrections by Alice WEB DL sync by VeRdiKT www.addic7ed.com 492 00:20:24,305 --> 00:20:30,541 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from OpenSubtitles.org