1 00:00:06,172 --> 00:00:10,040 Everybody dies. I'm told that's just the way it is. 2 00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:13,592 I'm told I'm not supposed to argue or question or even try to understand. 3 00:00:14,639 --> 00:00:16,715 I'm told a lot these days. 4 00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:20,349 Ever since my life was snuffed out by a toilet seat 5 00:00:20,478 --> 00:00:23,396 and I joined the ranks of the undead. 6 00:00:24,774 --> 00:00:27,728 This is Rube. He's undead too. 7 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:30,815 He gets the list, who's to die, when and where, 8 00:00:30,947 --> 00:00:34,067 which he passes on to the rest of us grim reapers. 9 00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:37,949 - This is what we look like to the living. - Holy shit. 10 00:00:38,079 --> 00:00:42,124 My name is George Lass. I take souls. 11 00:00:42,250 --> 00:00:45,785 This was my home, and this was my family. 12 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,921 Dad, Reggie, Mom. 13 00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,966 They're having trouble coping. 14 00:00:52,093 --> 00:00:55,711 Do you guys get off dropping pianos on people? 15 00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:58,634 It's not our job to drop the pianos. 16 00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:01,055 Whose job is it? 17 00:01:01,186 --> 00:01:05,230 Gravelings. They set things in motion, make the accidents happen. 18 00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:10,018 - They kill people? - Life and death have to exist in harmony. 19 00:01:10,820 --> 00:01:14,320 - That balance has to be maintained. - Or else? 20 00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:17,652 Things get out of hand, and that ain't pretty. 21 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:25,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 22 00:02:24,686 --> 00:02:27,603 Long and gnarled is the fickle finger of fate, 23 00:02:27,731 --> 00:02:30,850 but that finger has a pisser of a hangnail. 24 00:02:30,984 --> 00:02:33,901 It can be crippling, and in the game of life and death, 25 00:02:34,029 --> 00:02:36,187 it's good that fate has a weakness, 26 00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:40,320 like the candy-coated goodness of a lightly salted Peanut Poppy. 27 00:02:40,452 --> 00:02:45,197 For those not raised in the South, a Peanut Poppy is like a peanut M&M, 28 00:02:45,331 --> 00:02:47,704 but just different enough to avoid litigation. 29 00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:50,752 And the purple ones are the best. 30 00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:54,711 From the fields of Georgia to a factory processing unit 31 00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:56,750 to a store near you... 32 00:02:58,386 --> 00:03:02,514 .. something as insignificant as a Peanut Poppy can change fate. 33 00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:06,050 I kind of prefer M&M's. 34 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:08,937 I like these. These are salted. 35 00:03:09,064 --> 00:03:12,183 I think I'd like them better if they weren't. 36 00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,941 I mean, they're good but... 37 00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:19,606 Go buy yourself some M&M's. 38 00:03:21,159 --> 00:03:23,282 I wish she had a tail. 39 00:03:23,411 --> 00:03:26,163 If it was wagging, I'd know she liked me. 40 00:03:26,289 --> 00:03:31,200 I'm gonna eat a Listerine strip. These make your breath smell like ass. 41 00:03:31,336 --> 00:03:33,412 Ass and peanuts. 42 00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:41,928 Dammit. 43 00:03:43,723 --> 00:03:46,179 - My guy's a no-show. - Were you on time? 44 00:03:46,309 --> 00:03:48,218 For the time you gave me. 45 00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:53,644 So does this mean a soul is gonna rot now? He had an appointment. 46 00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:55,566 - He missed it. - So? 47 00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:57,567 So buttons. Don't you listen? 48 00:03:57,696 --> 00:04:01,195 Somebody doesn't show up, the appointment gets cancelled. 49 00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:04,361 - It's rare but it happens. - So he gets to live? 50 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:08,278 - Consequence-free? - Till his appointment's rescheduled. 51 00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:11,534 You said you can't reschedule. You can't change fate. 52 00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:14,206 Cardinal rule - everybody dies. 53 00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:17,208 Every so often things don't go as planned. 54 00:04:17,340 --> 00:04:22,714 So on a whim he goes to pick up doughnuts for the office and he gets to live? 55 00:04:22,846 --> 00:04:24,803 Sounds like instant karma. 56 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,683 No one mentioned death had a loophole. 57 00:04:27,809 --> 00:04:29,683 That's really fucking unfair. 58 00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:33,977 You like the ladies, right? 59 00:04:35,233 --> 00:04:37,558 Sure you do. 60 00:04:38,653 --> 00:04:42,521 You and me, hop and pop? Clearwater casino, north of the border? 61 00:04:42,657 --> 00:04:46,986 - Drive up, fly back. What do you say? - I'm easy. 62 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:50,037 Actually, I know some mates in Clearwater. 63 00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:54,457 Here. You might wanna ask for a late lunch. 64 00:04:55,253 --> 00:04:59,880 - Where's Betty? - Incapacitated. She's working on it. 65 00:05:01,176 --> 00:05:04,960 Hello! There's been a mistake! 66 00:05:10,226 --> 00:05:15,813 Fate isn't always fickle. Sometimes it sticks to what it knows. 67 00:05:16,691 --> 00:05:18,767 Thanks for the ride, Joy. 68 00:05:20,028 --> 00:05:22,649 I asked you not to call me that. 69 00:05:23,365 --> 00:05:26,069 It's your name. Don't you like your name? 70 00:05:26,201 --> 00:05:31,906 It's fine, but you don't need to say it unless someone asks you what it is, got it? 71 00:05:32,957 --> 00:05:37,204 You might want to nod or something to acknowledge that I've spoken. 72 00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:40,254 - Thank you. - Now can I go? 73 00:05:42,425 --> 00:05:44,418 Yes. 74 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:51,309 It was like watching reruns of my childhood. 75 00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:55,885 I knew almost nothing about my sister. 76 00:05:57,148 --> 00:06:01,312 I'm not even really sure what grade she's in. Fifth, I think. 77 00:06:03,571 --> 00:06:04,734 Help! 78 00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:09,201 - Hey, Lassie. - Lass-hole. 79 00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:18,121 How could someone so invisible to me be so visible to everyone else? 80 00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:23,079 Gross! 81 00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:27,428 Maybe because she acted like the princess of weird. 82 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:40,850 I sense you're not challenged. 83 00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:45,654 Are you challenged, Millie? 84 00:06:47,032 --> 00:06:48,858 Sort of. 85 00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:53,535 Cold and flu season is almost upon us. We're about to get very busy. 86 00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:58,788 How would you feel about having a weensy bit more responsibility? 87 00:07:00,503 --> 00:07:01,535 Uh... 88 00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:04,341 - OK. - That's the spirit. 89 00:07:04,466 --> 00:07:08,878 United Insurance is looking for a filer with a positive attitude. 90 00:07:09,012 --> 00:07:11,847 This is regarded as a low-interest position, 91 00:07:11,973 --> 00:07:14,132 so our options will be limited. 92 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:16,805 I'd like you to compile a list 93 00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:21,314 of remedial-skill avails for me and prioritise them. 94 00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:24,892 - In what order? - Start with people who are best suited 95 00:07:25,028 --> 00:07:27,435 and work your way down to the dregs. 96 00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:30,063 Isn't responsibility fun? 97 00:07:33,495 --> 00:07:37,113 As I worked through the dregs, 98 00:07:37,248 --> 00:07:40,166 I couldn't help but ponder the day I died. 99 00:07:44,339 --> 00:07:48,253 What if I stayed in the office for my 35-minute lunch hour? 100 00:07:48,385 --> 00:07:53,047 What if I ate in the break room? What if I missed my appointment? 101 00:07:53,181 --> 00:07:55,802 What if it really was unfair? 102 00:07:55,934 --> 00:07:59,469 I may not have been able to save my life, 103 00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:02,973 but that didn't mean I couldn't save somebody else's. 104 00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:09,022 - Hi. - Hi. Um... 105 00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:13,734 My gynaecologist called and he needs to reschedule a little early, 106 00:08:13,868 --> 00:08:16,075 so if that's possible... 107 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:18,825 He just can't make up his mind, can he? 108 00:08:18,957 --> 00:08:23,702 - Yeah. So is that OK? - Of course, don't be silly. 109 00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:26,078 I hope it's nothing serious. 110 00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:29,797 No, no. I'm fine. It's just... 111 00:08:29,926 --> 00:08:32,417 - I'm fine. - Is it a... 112 00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:36,881 What? 113 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:39,258 Are they doing a...? 114 00:08:39,394 --> 00:08:41,137 Oh, uh-huh... 115 00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:44,971 - Whatever it is, early detection is key. - Yeah. 116 00:08:45,108 --> 00:08:49,770 Last time I had a Pap, my ass stuck to the paper, 117 00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:54,068 so when my ob-gyn told me to slide down, the paper ripped. 118 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:58,993 He kept trying to pull more paper up from that little roll under the table 119 00:08:59,122 --> 00:09:04,199 and tuck it around my head, but that kept falling off too. 120 00:09:04,336 --> 00:09:07,040 I tell you, we got to laughing. 121 00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:10,338 I was laughing so hard he couldn't get the speculum in 122 00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:15,294 because my muscles were all tense, because of the laughing. 123 00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:19,428 You know, I think that was one of my best laughs ever. 124 00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:29,351 - You got 14. Dealer has 16. Hit or stick? - Don't know. 125 00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:32,522 - Why aren't you watching the table? - Don't know. 126 00:09:33,531 --> 00:09:36,402 You hit. Somehow, the guy next to you busts. 127 00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:38,693 Do I like this guy? 128 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:40,868 He's your fellow man. Of course. 129 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:44,449 You took his card. He doesn't wanna be your friend. 130 00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:48,083 - He's crying into his beer. - Then I would stick. 131 00:09:48,213 --> 00:09:51,130 Someone can blow it for the whole table. 132 00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:54,792 - So don't let her sit at the table. - She's already sitting. 133 00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:59,139 - Don't get excited. - I'm not excited. What are you talking about? 134 00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:03,394 You probably should have this conversation with George. 135 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:06,011 - Why you doing this to me? - What? 136 00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,434 - Nothing. - I'm not doing anything. 137 00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:12,485 - Just take a breath. - I'm breathing fine, Mason. 138 00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:15,103 Good. If you want, I'll talk to her. 139 00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:19,320 I don't want you talking to anybody. I'm sorry I brought it up. 140 00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:21,860 - Don't be sorry. - It was a mistake. 141 00:10:21,996 --> 00:10:25,864 - We were having a chat. - I should say it to George. 142 00:10:26,001 --> 00:10:29,037 - We didn't have this conversation. - What conversation did we have? 143 00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:31,661 Who gives a shit? Not this one. 144 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:37,886 Gary, I thought you came in here to exercise. 145 00:10:38,013 --> 00:10:40,219 - I did. - What happened? 146 00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:42,092 Nothing. I'm exercising. 147 00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:45,426 What are you talking about? 148 00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:49,559 I found a way to work out and read at the same time. 149 00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:54,269 I do that every day, Gary. You see our treadmill has a book stand. 150 00:10:54,404 --> 00:10:57,773 Can you cook and work out at the same time? Or drive? 151 00:10:57,907 --> 00:11:02,154 - Of course not. - Well, now you can. 152 00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:06,404 - What is that? - A miracle. 153 00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:09,919 No more crunches, no more sit-ups. 154 00:11:10,045 --> 00:11:13,663 All I have to do is simply turn it and burn it. 155 00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:17,883 All you have to do for your Absolver is send... 156 00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:21,759 I found PJ Monroe 11 minutes before his ETD, 157 00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:25,425 almost two miles from where he was scheduled to die. 158 00:11:25,560 --> 00:11:30,471 - I'm sorry. Mr Monroe isn't available. - Did you tell him it's important? 159 00:11:30,607 --> 00:11:33,643 - He's on his way out. - It'll only take a second. 160 00:11:33,777 --> 00:11:37,027 He's not gonna see you. He doesn't know who you are. 161 00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:43,275 I'm the girl his son drugged, and it's regarding him video-taping me 162 00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:47,575 while homeless people had sex with my unconscious body. 163 00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:49,914 I'll double-check. 164 00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:52,997 A stream of lies spewed from my mouth, 165 00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,703 each one more elaborate than the last. 166 00:11:55,840 --> 00:12:00,218 I drew on everything I ever read in Penthouse Forum and made it my own. 167 00:12:00,345 --> 00:12:03,429 I was queen of deception, and I was on fire. 168 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:07,175 By the time I finished, I almost believed it myself. 169 00:12:07,310 --> 00:12:09,884 .. woke up someplace else. 170 00:12:10,021 --> 00:12:15,360 You don't show up for your appointment, it gets cancelled. 171 00:12:16,194 --> 00:12:20,061 - Cancel my two o'clock. - Rare, but it happens. 172 00:12:20,198 --> 00:12:23,863 I would like to give you... some money. 173 00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:26,698 And instant karma to boot. 174 00:12:29,332 --> 00:12:35,536 PJ Monroe should be running a red light to make his two o'clock, but he's not. 175 00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:38,839 Excuse me. I am so sorry. 176 00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:41,754 My sister's card. Call her. She's a lawyer. 177 00:12:41,886 --> 00:12:45,801 She will crucify that little son of a bitch. 178 00:12:45,932 --> 00:12:48,008 - Thanks. - OK. 179 00:12:49,519 --> 00:12:52,603 Mason and Rube had popped the busload of gamblers 180 00:12:52,731 --> 00:12:55,103 and were flying home standby. 181 00:13:06,369 --> 00:13:09,619 - Where are you going? - To kill that fucking baby. 182 00:13:10,331 --> 00:13:15,871 I'm just kidding. I love babies. I gotta make a sissy. Back in two shakes. 183 00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:42,484 But tempting fate is another issue altogether, 184 00:13:44,282 --> 00:13:49,193 especially when you're supplementing your income smuggling drugs up your ass. 185 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:12,347 While Rube was being fickle-fingered, 186 00:14:12,477 --> 00:14:16,142 I was returning to Happy Time with a click in my heel. 187 00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:19,641 I was strong. I was invincible. 188 00:14:19,776 --> 00:14:25,197 I beat the system, righted a universal wrong, but what about the variables? 189 00:14:26,574 --> 00:14:30,738 Not even Herbig, who sanitises herself to the point of pathology, 190 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:34,204 can account for all the variables. 191 00:14:34,332 --> 00:14:39,575 These are the remedial-skills avails that Delores asked for. 192 00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:42,583 I'll just leave 'em on her chair. 193 00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:55,428 I was just writing you a note. How'd it go? 194 00:14:55,562 --> 00:15:00,058 - How did what go? - The... Pap. 195 00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:01,223 Oh. 196 00:15:01,359 --> 00:15:04,313 Fine, fine. It's all good. 197 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:07,949 - I was just... - When d'you get the results? 198 00:15:08,950 --> 00:15:10,777 Um... Uh... 199 00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:13,947 - A couple of days. - That's quick. 200 00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:17,449 By the time I get my results, I forget I've had the test. 201 00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:20,750 - I hope they don't make you repeat it. - They won't. 202 00:15:20,879 --> 00:15:24,793 They will if it's abnormal. Listen, I left you a Bowes catalogue. 203 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:27,047 Your workspace is a little sparse. 204 00:15:27,177 --> 00:15:31,637 Why don't you get yourself a blotter and one of those jelly wrist supports? 205 00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:33,841 OK. 206 00:15:41,107 --> 00:15:45,401 Pull your pants down around your ankles and bend over, please. 207 00:15:45,528 --> 00:15:47,854 OK. 208 00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:58,036 I was kidding about the baby. 209 00:15:58,166 --> 00:16:01,452 You want me to say sorry? I'll say I'm sorry. 210 00:16:01,586 --> 00:16:04,753 It's every Saturday for ten weeks. 211 00:16:04,881 --> 00:16:08,464 I thought it might be something fun we could do together. 212 00:16:08,593 --> 00:16:12,507 - I have yoga on Saturdays. - Well, you could do both. 213 00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:16,473 What do they make you do? 214 00:16:19,020 --> 00:16:21,938 Undies too, sir. 215 00:16:30,532 --> 00:16:33,486 It's a pottery class. You make pottery. 216 00:16:33,618 --> 00:16:35,694 What kind? 217 00:16:35,829 --> 00:16:38,367 Coffee mugs, bowls. 218 00:16:40,542 --> 00:16:42,997 Can't you just buy those at the store? 219 00:16:43,128 --> 00:16:45,085 Would you prefer to paint? 220 00:16:45,213 --> 00:16:48,131 I'm gonna have to ask you to lean into me. 221 00:16:58,435 --> 00:17:03,013 Just a kind of general apology? To whom it may concern? 222 00:17:03,148 --> 00:17:05,603 He's clean. 223 00:17:05,734 --> 00:17:08,651 Put your clothes back on. You're free to go. 224 00:17:15,326 --> 00:17:16,489 Thanks. 225 00:17:20,498 --> 00:17:23,250 I'm gonna pretend this didn't happen. 226 00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:31,122 I think something just broke. 227 00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:36,758 I'm gonna kill that fucking baby. 228 00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:41,805 You're very well liked here. 229 00:17:41,936 --> 00:17:44,012 - I am? - Absolutely! 230 00:17:44,147 --> 00:17:47,267 I've never seen someone find their place so quickly. 231 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,689 It really feels like you're one of us. 232 00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:55,655 But this part-time business, it just isn't working out for you. 233 00:17:55,784 --> 00:17:59,733 I'd like you one more day a week. What do you say? 234 00:17:59,871 --> 00:18:01,365 Uh, what day? 235 00:18:01,498 --> 00:18:04,997 Tuesday, so we get you Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. 236 00:18:05,126 --> 00:18:06,585 OK. 237 00:18:06,711 --> 00:18:09,463 Somehow I was failing upward. 238 00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:12,756 Wonderful! That makes me very happy. 239 00:18:12,884 --> 00:18:15,719 I stood out because I was the only one standing. 240 00:18:18,056 --> 00:18:20,132 Delores Herbig. 241 00:18:22,352 --> 00:18:24,641 Why, hello, Sandra Sherman. 242 00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:29,097 Thank you so much for returning my call. 243 00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:32,444 Yes, yes, I do. Are you still available? 244 00:18:32,987 --> 00:18:37,032 Wonderful! You just made my day. 245 00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:42,401 Have Crystal call Deloitte & Touche and say we got that executive assistant. 246 00:18:42,539 --> 00:18:45,077 Sandra! 247 00:18:45,917 --> 00:18:50,413 She had her little secret, and that secret was safe with me. 248 00:18:50,547 --> 00:18:53,832 For all I know, it was her cosmic role to spread disease, 249 00:18:53,967 --> 00:18:56,884 and for all she knew, I was the enemy. 250 00:18:57,012 --> 00:18:58,755 Um... 251 00:18:58,888 --> 00:19:01,842 Delores asked me to ask you to... 252 00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:06,720 I couldn't bring myself to give her an order, even if it was from someone else. 253 00:19:06,855 --> 00:19:10,140 .. for the number to the lady at Deloitte & Touche. 254 00:19:19,743 --> 00:19:21,819 Thanks. 255 00:19:23,455 --> 00:19:28,580 And just so you know, I won't tell anyone about what you did, OK? 256 00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:32,247 What did I do? 257 00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:35,915 Even after thwarting fate itself... 258 00:19:36,051 --> 00:19:37,711 Nothing. 259 00:19:37,844 --> 00:19:40,631 .. Crystal still intimidated the shit out of me. 260 00:19:40,764 --> 00:19:42,922 Never mind. 261 00:20:02,577 --> 00:20:05,613 - Hi. - I just got off the phone with Marilyn. 262 00:20:05,747 --> 00:20:08,997 You're making friends all over the place, aren't you? 263 00:20:09,125 --> 00:20:11,082 Good. 264 00:20:11,211 --> 00:20:14,247 But I said I wanted Crystal to make that call. 265 00:20:14,381 --> 00:20:18,378 I couldn't say Crystal scared the shit out of me, so I said: 266 00:20:18,510 --> 00:20:23,006 She seemed really busy and I didn't wanna bother her. 267 00:20:23,139 --> 00:20:27,635 Crystal was busy? I'm sorry. Were you about to use the phone? 268 00:20:27,769 --> 00:20:33,475 I was just calling you to see if there was anything I could do to help. 269 00:20:33,608 --> 00:20:36,894 I became aware of the words after they left my mouth. 270 00:20:37,028 --> 00:20:41,275 I like the way you show initiative, Millie. I like it a lot. 271 00:20:41,408 --> 00:20:45,820 I'd better watch my back. Pretty soon you'll have my job. 272 00:20:45,954 --> 00:20:48,279 Only after you get a promotion. 273 00:20:49,582 --> 00:20:51,741 I felt dirty. 274 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:55,495 Well, keep up the good work, and thank you. 275 00:20:55,630 --> 00:20:58,121 You're welcome. 276 00:21:00,844 --> 00:21:03,963 You could learn a thing or two from that girl. 277 00:21:08,643 --> 00:21:11,395 Everybody's on the clock tonight. 278 00:21:11,521 --> 00:21:16,432 I think I should probably bow out. I'm feeling unwell and a bit stopped up. 279 00:21:16,568 --> 00:21:20,103 That's not an option. Eeny, meeny, miny, moe. 280 00:21:20,238 --> 00:21:24,236 - These are right next to each other. - Is a balcony gonna collapse? 281 00:21:24,367 --> 00:21:28,032 - Some don't even have times. - You got an eight-hour window. 282 00:21:28,163 --> 00:21:31,413 It's all a bit of a hiccup. Nobody expects perfection. 283 00:21:31,541 --> 00:21:35,705 - Is there gonna be an earthquake? - A bus of ladies going over a cliff? 284 00:21:35,837 --> 00:21:37,462 I know just the one. 285 00:21:37,589 --> 00:21:42,049 It seemed like a good time to slip in under the radar. 286 00:21:42,177 --> 00:21:45,759 I forgot to tell you, my last guy didn't show up. 287 00:21:47,390 --> 00:21:51,055 Just thought you might wanna know. What's the soup today? 288 00:21:51,186 --> 00:21:53,013 Cream of bullshit. 289 00:21:55,023 --> 00:21:59,270 I stood at the intersection for like an hour and nothing happened. 290 00:21:59,402 --> 00:22:03,067 Pretend a few days have gone by and you rethought this lie. 291 00:22:03,198 --> 00:22:06,448 You're sad, repentant, because you had an epiphany. 292 00:22:06,576 --> 00:22:09,447 I'm not lying. 293 00:22:10,288 --> 00:22:12,957 - Jesus! - Peanut, people lie all the time. 294 00:22:13,083 --> 00:22:15,538 - It's not a bad thing. - Sweet Jesus! 295 00:22:15,669 --> 00:22:19,500 You're just misguided. How's about trying some honesty out for size? 296 00:22:19,631 --> 00:22:24,127 I can't seem to make my fingers work. A little help here, please? 297 00:22:24,260 --> 00:22:29,468 - What have you got to say for yourself? - Help me. Help me. Jesus. 298 00:22:29,599 --> 00:22:31,343 I'm not lying. 299 00:22:31,476 --> 00:22:36,352 If a lie is big enough, there's a need to protect it. 300 00:22:36,481 --> 00:22:39,980 - It's almost maternal. - Thank you, Jesus. 301 00:22:40,944 --> 00:22:45,191 I could only pray there wasn't any surveillance footage 302 00:22:45,323 --> 00:22:48,775 linking me to PJ Monroe and his non-death. 303 00:22:48,910 --> 00:22:51,366 I can't get this. 304 00:22:51,496 --> 00:22:57,202 I planned to call as little attention to myself as possible. 305 00:22:59,504 --> 00:23:04,747 It landed on my wank. My wank is the key. 306 00:23:04,884 --> 00:23:07,636 That was the plan anyway. 307 00:23:07,762 --> 00:23:10,882 - Have you thought about having a wank? - No. 308 00:23:11,891 --> 00:23:15,058 I saw a dirty movie about a girl who had a wank. 309 00:23:15,186 --> 00:23:19,647 - She looked like a boy with fake tits. - Will you please stop talking? 310 00:23:39,461 --> 00:23:42,082 Athletic supplier Monroco 311 00:23:42,213 --> 00:23:46,875 issued a massive recall of their latest product Absolver. 312 00:23:47,010 --> 00:23:49,715 I want to say that the Monroe corporation 313 00:23:49,846 --> 00:23:53,262 is deeply troubled by the loss of life. 314 00:23:53,391 --> 00:23:57,603 It slowly dawned on me that I may have made a mistake. 315 00:23:57,729 --> 00:24:00,730 I didn't know PJ Monroe was contemplating 316 00:24:00,857 --> 00:24:05,069 the latest risk-assessment warning from Legal when I paid him a visit. 317 00:24:05,195 --> 00:24:10,236 I didn't know he was surprised to learn, after months of exhaustive testing, 318 00:24:10,367 --> 00:24:14,364 Product Safety had determined that people who exercise sweat. 319 00:24:14,496 --> 00:24:19,490 I didn't know that sweat when combined with an un-ground electrical current 320 00:24:19,626 --> 00:24:24,122 could result in what the boys in the lab nickname a belly fire. 321 00:24:24,255 --> 00:24:30,175 But I did know PJ Monroe was distracted and not thinking clearly that day. 322 00:24:31,638 --> 00:24:36,099 The potential dangers of the Absolver were somehow far from his mind. 323 00:24:36,226 --> 00:24:39,891 You're not my son! I didn't teach you to treat women that way. 324 00:24:40,021 --> 00:24:44,730 What the hell's the matter with you? Are you insane? I'll kill you! 325 00:24:44,859 --> 00:24:51,028 I don't think this is what Delores had in mind when she said responsibility is fun. 326 00:24:51,157 --> 00:24:55,155 May I have your attention, please? 327 00:24:55,286 --> 00:24:57,362 Rube was tap-dancing 328 00:24:57,497 --> 00:25:00,866 about an after-life fuck-up with the Absolver souls. 329 00:25:01,001 --> 00:25:03,373 .. a little off guard today. 330 00:25:03,503 --> 00:25:08,710 There's just a bit of a backlog and I appreciate your patience. 331 00:25:15,140 --> 00:25:17,927 I apologise. 332 00:25:18,059 --> 00:25:21,594 This is just terribly embarrassing. 333 00:25:21,730 --> 00:25:23,806 Look... 334 00:25:25,525 --> 00:25:29,653 Before you go anywhere, I'm gonna give you the name of somebody 335 00:25:29,779 --> 00:25:33,231 whose magic just does wonders. 336 00:25:33,366 --> 00:25:35,442 You'll be happy. 337 00:25:38,079 --> 00:25:40,784 I wanna thank you for understanding. 338 00:26:02,479 --> 00:26:06,975 I had this one dude and he had these electrical belts all over his body. 339 00:26:07,108 --> 00:26:11,402 He looked like the Bionic Man, Bionic Woman, Six Million Dollar Man, 340 00:26:11,529 --> 00:26:13,273 whatever that shit is. 341 00:26:13,406 --> 00:26:15,980 I don't why these people do this. 342 00:26:16,117 --> 00:26:20,863 You know that lady on Three's Company with the big titties? I did her thing. 343 00:26:20,997 --> 00:26:25,992 Her butt-blaster, ass-master... Whatever. Anyway, I looked ridiculous. 344 00:26:30,423 --> 00:26:32,297 Are you high? 345 00:26:33,468 --> 00:26:35,959 I've got illegals in my bottom. 346 00:26:36,805 --> 00:26:40,423 - Why do you do this to yourself? - I don't know. 347 00:26:47,357 --> 00:26:49,396 You're taking this awfully hard. 348 00:26:50,568 --> 00:26:53,902 I just feel... really bad 349 00:26:54,030 --> 00:26:59,903 about all the people that had to die... accidentally. 350 00:27:00,036 --> 00:27:02,823 Is that it? I thought maybe you saw the news 351 00:27:02,956 --> 00:27:07,203 and were feeling shitty about what you did. 352 00:27:07,335 --> 00:27:09,624 Pulled the wrong piece out. 353 00:27:09,754 --> 00:27:14,048 A hiccup is when something happens that's not supposed to happen. 354 00:27:14,175 --> 00:27:19,170 The system has to figure out what that something is and fix it. 355 00:27:19,305 --> 00:27:22,556 - PJ Monroe. - I'm sorry. 356 00:27:22,684 --> 00:27:26,812 What'd you do? Slash his tyres, have him arrested? 357 00:27:26,938 --> 00:27:29,180 I just talked to him. 358 00:27:29,315 --> 00:27:31,474 Must have been some conversation. 359 00:27:31,609 --> 00:27:34,397 - I guess. - I hope it was worth it. 360 00:27:34,529 --> 00:27:37,067 - You got the hots for the guy? - No! 361 00:27:37,198 --> 00:27:40,033 - Did he give you some money? - No! 362 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:42,651 Help me out. 363 00:27:43,329 --> 00:27:46,781 I just wanted to see if I could do it. 364 00:27:46,916 --> 00:27:51,377 I need somebody to give me lessons on how to communicate with you, peanut, 365 00:27:51,504 --> 00:27:53,580 'cause I'm at a loss. 366 00:27:53,715 --> 00:27:57,298 The coin's in the slot and the gumball's on its way 367 00:27:57,427 --> 00:28:00,344 and I'm plumb out of wisdom. 368 00:28:00,472 --> 00:28:02,844 I'd start sleeping with the lights on. 369 00:28:02,974 --> 00:28:06,924 I didn't know if that was a threat or a warning. 370 00:28:07,562 --> 00:28:12,769 Rube washed his hands of me, but that didn't mean I was off the hook. 371 00:28:12,901 --> 00:28:16,436 It only got worse. I broke the rules. 372 00:28:16,571 --> 00:28:20,438 The gravelings declared hunting season on my ass. 373 00:28:39,260 --> 00:28:40,719 Ow! 374 00:28:45,308 --> 00:28:49,258 Rube was only responsible for us up to a point. 375 00:28:56,945 --> 00:29:00,029 No, no, no. Do I look like I own rubber sheets? 376 00:29:00,156 --> 00:29:02,232 You're sleeping on the floor. 377 00:29:02,367 --> 00:29:06,412 - You're not making me sleep on the floor? - Sure I am. 378 00:29:06,538 --> 00:29:08,993 Let me get a pillow. 379 00:29:09,124 --> 00:29:13,501 It's a nice pillow. Sleep tight. 380 00:29:13,628 --> 00:29:18,871 It was sad to realise he'd have my back, if I hadn't already turned it on him. 381 00:29:19,009 --> 00:29:24,347 I'm putting a pan next to your head for throw-up. It's right next to your head. 382 00:29:36,109 --> 00:29:40,687 The burden of spreading disease didn't rest solely on Crystal's shoulders. 383 00:29:42,449 --> 00:29:46,281 After all, there's lots of ways to spread disease. 384 00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:14,596 For Christ's sake! 385 00:31:03,113 --> 00:31:04,144 Ow! 386 00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:06,736 Fucker! Shit! 387 00:31:08,159 --> 00:31:11,824 I didn't know you used that kind of language, Millie. 388 00:31:12,664 --> 00:31:16,662 I don't. It just really hurt. 389 00:31:16,793 --> 00:31:20,458 Well, it's a very aggressive word. 390 00:31:20,588 --> 00:31:23,079 I know. It's just... 391 00:31:24,009 --> 00:31:28,967 I won't say it again. I'm sorry. Do you see how red it is? 392 00:31:29,097 --> 00:31:31,802 Maybe you'd better get some ice on that. 393 00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:36,430 All around me the bridges were burning. 394 00:31:37,522 --> 00:31:41,520 I feel like I've been poisoned. Have you been poisoned? 395 00:31:41,651 --> 00:31:45,150 No, not on purpose. I had some bad salmon once. 396 00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:48,446 - I don't touch it any more. - Was it salmon mousse? 397 00:31:48,575 --> 00:31:51,326 I don't know. It was canned. 398 00:31:51,453 --> 00:31:53,529 - Morning. - Morning. 399 00:31:55,206 --> 00:31:58,540 - Why are you leaving? - You'll put me in a bad mood. 400 00:31:58,668 --> 00:32:01,586 And I don't wanna be in a bad mood. 401 00:32:01,713 --> 00:32:04,334 - Do you not like me? - Not right this minute. 402 00:32:04,466 --> 00:32:07,039 You're a constipator. You disturb my shit. 403 00:32:07,177 --> 00:32:10,296 I think you're marvellous. 404 00:32:10,430 --> 00:32:12,719 This is not your role model. 405 00:32:12,849 --> 00:32:15,803 In case you haven't noticed, I'm really sorry. 406 00:32:15,935 --> 00:32:20,597 You'll be sorry till I forgive you or till you stop doing stupid things. 407 00:32:20,732 --> 00:32:23,223 - You never tried to save anybody? - No. 408 00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:26,563 - Have you? - I need to be unconscious. 409 00:32:26,696 --> 00:32:29,863 I know I piss you off, but you piss me off too. 410 00:32:29,991 --> 00:32:33,443 - I piss you off? - You accept everything the way it is. 411 00:32:33,578 --> 00:32:36,365 - Why don't you ask questions? - I'm not curious. 412 00:32:36,498 --> 00:32:40,495 If you don't get this right, someone'll drop a toilet seat on you. 413 00:32:40,627 --> 00:32:43,296 Give this to Roxy when she shows up. 414 00:32:44,422 --> 00:32:46,166 Here. I got something. 415 00:32:48,426 --> 00:32:51,961 Buy yourself a waffle. Cherry on top. 416 00:32:56,351 --> 00:32:58,723 Do you think I'm a constipator? 417 00:32:58,853 --> 00:33:03,017 Heed his advice and stay on his good side. He's like a volcano. 418 00:33:03,149 --> 00:33:05,308 He erupts and he spews lava, 419 00:33:05,443 --> 00:33:09,607 and all the little villagers, they run around for their lives. 420 00:33:10,990 --> 00:33:15,534 But he stops and you can go back to the safety of your own home. 421 00:33:15,662 --> 00:33:18,449 How long is he gonna stay mad? 422 00:33:20,375 --> 00:33:22,948 I've seen him stay mad for years. 423 00:33:23,086 --> 00:33:26,336 I've seen it, but not like this, pit-bull mad. 424 00:33:26,464 --> 00:33:31,043 It's like this disturbing, simmering, quiet rage mad. 425 00:33:33,013 --> 00:33:36,547 But he likes you, George. He'll stay mad for less time. 426 00:33:36,683 --> 00:33:38,722 Days? Weeks? 427 00:33:38,852 --> 00:33:42,185 - What's the other one, after that one? - Months? 428 00:33:42,313 --> 00:33:44,390 That's the one. 429 00:33:53,366 --> 00:33:56,616 - Hi. - Hi. 430 00:33:57,328 --> 00:34:01,029 - Why aren't you at work? - Called in sick. Come in. 431 00:34:01,166 --> 00:34:04,001 - I have to wash my hands. - No, you don't. 432 00:34:04,127 --> 00:34:08,670 - I have dirt under my fingernails. - You're not fooling anyone. Sit down. 433 00:34:21,895 --> 00:34:24,600 What's with that bird, Reggie? 434 00:34:26,107 --> 00:34:29,441 - You didn't kill it, did you? - I found it like that. 435 00:34:29,569 --> 00:34:32,605 Any other dead animals here I should know about? 436 00:34:32,739 --> 00:34:34,233 No. 437 00:34:34,366 --> 00:34:38,612 Keeping a dead animal in your toy box is something a crazy person does. 438 00:34:38,745 --> 00:34:42,445 - I'm not crazy. - Garbage man wouldn't even take it. 439 00:34:42,582 --> 00:34:45,785 I had to call Animal Control and the health department 440 00:34:45,919 --> 00:34:48,374 before someone would pick it up. 441 00:34:48,505 --> 00:34:51,624 What do you want me to do about it? 442 00:34:51,758 --> 00:34:54,249 I don't like where we're headed. 443 00:34:55,804 --> 00:34:58,259 I don't... 444 00:34:58,390 --> 00:35:01,509 I hate it so much. 445 00:35:06,106 --> 00:35:09,356 I love you, Reggie. 446 00:35:09,484 --> 00:35:14,063 Every time I talk to you, I feel like we're little rats in a cage, 447 00:35:14,197 --> 00:35:17,613 and we keep touching that goddamn bar, 448 00:35:17,742 --> 00:35:19,949 and we keep getting shocked. 449 00:35:20,078 --> 00:35:24,740 We don't... effing learn. 450 00:35:27,544 --> 00:35:30,035 Doesn't it make you tired? 451 00:35:32,674 --> 00:35:34,797 'Cause I'm tired. 452 00:35:56,072 --> 00:35:58,859 You missed me, motherfucker! 453 00:36:00,785 --> 00:36:04,653 - Did you see that thing fall down? - You have a flat tyre. 454 00:36:04,789 --> 00:36:08,739 I walked out my truck, the shit fell down. May I have some juice? 455 00:36:08,877 --> 00:36:14,417 These brats egged my car. Then this bitch comes up to me. $25 ticket. 456 00:36:14,549 --> 00:36:17,799 So? Pay the damn ticket. It's been a fucked-up week. 457 00:36:17,927 --> 00:36:21,972 In that moment, I understood Roxy more than ever before. 458 00:36:22,098 --> 00:36:25,052 A piece of the puzzle had fallen into place. 459 00:36:25,185 --> 00:36:30,262 It was like finding out someone's parents are psychiatrists or Catholic. 460 00:36:31,399 --> 00:36:34,436 Roxy had an even shittier job than me. 461 00:36:34,569 --> 00:36:37,523 I don't know how she put up with it. 462 00:36:43,036 --> 00:36:45,657 I didn't know JH Arnold was the sunshine 463 00:36:45,789 --> 00:36:48,327 after a long dark night of assholes. 464 00:36:51,419 --> 00:36:56,662 I didn't know he greeted his ticket with a smile and said, "You got me." 465 00:36:56,800 --> 00:36:59,836 I didn't know he shared his favourite candy, 466 00:36:59,969 --> 00:37:02,377 the candy his silver-haired mother 467 00:37:02,514 --> 00:37:05,598 shipped to him special on birthdays and holidays. 468 00:37:05,725 --> 00:37:08,928 And I didn't know she got his name on a Post-it 469 00:37:09,062 --> 00:37:13,771 almost a year to the day after their brief but fateful meeting. 470 00:37:17,821 --> 00:37:22,281 But I do know there was something about him she thought was worth saving, 471 00:37:23,159 --> 00:37:25,650 because she changed his fate. 472 00:37:29,958 --> 00:37:33,374 I don't know how, but she did. 473 00:37:36,297 --> 00:37:40,959 They made her breath smell like ass, but the Peanut Poppies won her over. 474 00:37:41,094 --> 00:37:44,878 She'd never admit it, so there was no point in asking. 475 00:37:45,015 --> 00:37:48,549 I saw the words coming out. I didn't understand a word. 476 00:37:49,686 --> 00:37:52,556 - You got a flat tyre. - I heard you. 477 00:37:52,689 --> 00:37:55,180 Is one of those mine? Thank you. 478 00:37:57,610 --> 00:38:02,605 So I bought Crystal a present, a shoe gift-wrapped in dog turd. 479 00:38:07,162 --> 00:38:10,910 I'd been bitch-slapped by fate. 480 00:38:11,833 --> 00:38:14,538 But does that make me fate's bitch? 481 00:38:28,725 --> 00:38:32,473 They say if you mess with the bull, you get the horns, 482 00:38:32,604 --> 00:38:35,391 but what if the bull hung the cape over you 483 00:38:35,523 --> 00:38:37,812 and said red was your colour? 484 00:38:40,862 --> 00:38:43,531 I could easily replace the light bulb, 485 00:38:43,656 --> 00:38:47,191 but the smell of dog shit under her desk was gonna linger. 486 00:38:47,327 --> 00:38:51,538 Whether it be wrestling with fate or engaging in the art of war, 487 00:38:51,664 --> 00:38:54,535 sometimes a ceasefire is necessary. 488 00:38:55,543 --> 00:39:00,751 After a long protracted battle, was I finally forging an ally? 489 00:39:01,675 --> 00:39:04,545 Maybe fate doesn't always have the last word. 490 00:39:04,678 --> 00:39:07,429 Maybe fate doesn't want the last word. 491 00:39:07,555 --> 00:39:12,182 The first step in taxidermy is to have your wires measured and cut. 492 00:39:12,310 --> 00:39:14,635 One of you needs to hold the specimen. 493 00:39:14,771 --> 00:39:17,642 Pull the tips of the wings to full extension, 494 00:39:17,774 --> 00:39:22,352 while your partner threads the wire between the bone and the feathers, 495 00:39:22,487 --> 00:39:27,066 starting with the scapulars and into the contoured feathers. 496 00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:32,989 Your feather work and attention to detail is what makes your mount look... alive. 497 00:40:28,386 --> 00:40:32,965 Penne with mushrooms, northern Italian style, 498 00:40:33,099 --> 00:40:36,468 pinch of tarragon, light on the oil. 499 00:40:36,603 --> 00:40:41,348 Touch of vermouth. I use Aqua di Via. 500 00:40:41,483 --> 00:40:43,689 Extra dry. 501 00:40:43,818 --> 00:40:46,309 Not that cheap domestic crap. 502 00:42:07,277 --> 00:42:09,353 Subtitles: Sally Lewis ww. broadcasttext. com 503 00:42:10,305 --> 00:42:16,173 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org