1 00:00:07,255 --> 00:00:09,405 Xmas Story 2 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:17,074 Watch Movies, TV Series & Live Sports www.admitme.app 3 00:00:31,575 --> 00:00:34,487 Ladies and gentlemen, Conan O'Brien 's head! 4 00:00:36,775 --> 00:00:38,493 Thank you. Thank you. 5 00:00:38,695 --> 00:00:42,005 Let's get started. Max, play me over. 6 00:00:42,175 --> 00:00:44,245 Aaah! Someone forgot to feed Max! 7 00:00:46,655 --> 00:00:50,614 So, people are getting pretty worried about this Y2K problem, huh? 8 00:00:50,855 --> 00:00:53,767 BENDER: No! They fixed that 900 years ago! 9 00:00:53,975 --> 00:00:57,047 Just bear with me. I'm walking to work this morning... 10 00:00:57,295 --> 00:00:58,808 I doubt it! 11 00:00:59,055 --> 00:01:03,253 Listen, I may have lost my freakishly long legs in the War of 201 2... 12 00:01:03,495 --> 00:01:06,328 ...but I've still got something you'll never have: a soul! 13 00:01:06,615 --> 00:01:08,128 - Eh. - And freckles! 14 00:01:12,935 --> 00:01:14,607 Well, I'm out of material. 15 00:01:14,815 --> 00:01:17,204 You can catch me next week at the Andromeda Chuckle Hut. 16 00:01:17,415 --> 00:01:19,212 Enjoy your breakfast! 17 00:01:22,095 --> 00:01:23,084 BENDER: Let's face it. 18 00:01:23,295 --> 00:01:28,323 Comedy's a dead art form. Now, tragedy? That's funny. 19 00:01:28,575 --> 00:01:29,610 Come on, everyone. 20 00:01:29,855 --> 00:01:34,804 Perhaps skiing will help us forget the moldy old antics of Conan O'Brien. 21 00:01:35,055 --> 00:01:36,852 - Great idea! - We can only hope. 22 00:01:37,295 --> 00:01:39,126 FRY: This snow is beautiful. 23 00:01:39,615 --> 00:01:41,446 I'm glad global warming never happened. 24 00:01:41,695 --> 00:01:45,210 Actually, it did. Thank God, Nuclear Winter canceled it out. 25 00:01:46,375 --> 00:01:47,490 FRY: Hi. 26 00:01:47,695 --> 00:01:50,289 Enough of your mindless chitchat! Let's get going! 27 00:01:50,815 --> 00:01:52,533 HERMES: Damn it. We're stuck! 28 00:01:52,735 --> 00:01:55,203 At least you're not cold-blooded. 29 00:01:57,095 --> 00:02:00,451 Sweet lion of Zion, look at the professor go! 30 00:02:07,175 --> 00:02:10,053 [SNORES] 31 00:02:15,415 --> 00:02:17,406 Look out for those trees! 32 00:02:17,615 --> 00:02:19,765 Yeah, yeah, relax. Trees down! 33 00:02:19,975 --> 00:02:21,613 VOICE: Trees down! 34 00:02:22,015 --> 00:02:24,006 Cool. What if you want the trees up? 35 00:02:24,255 --> 00:02:25,813 VOICE: Trees up! 36 00:02:26,495 --> 00:02:28,326 - Trees down. VOICE: Trees down. 37 00:02:29,895 --> 00:02:31,647 Looking good, meatball! 38 00:02:34,895 --> 00:02:36,965 Excuse me, sir. You're snowboarding off the trail. 39 00:02:37,175 --> 00:02:40,963 Lick my frozen metal ass. Ha, ha, ha! 40 00:02:41,175 --> 00:02:42,210 Uh-oh. 41 00:02:42,575 --> 00:02:44,805 [SCREAMS] 42 00:02:55,655 --> 00:02:56,770 - Mommy! - Help! 43 00:03:02,455 --> 00:03:05,527 You, a bobsledder? That I'd like to see. 44 00:03:05,735 --> 00:03:07,407 Listen, you filthy crab. 45 00:03:07,655 --> 00:03:11,364 1 000 years ago, there was a legendary team of Jamaican bobsledders. 46 00:03:11,575 --> 00:03:12,610 Yep, I remember. 47 00:03:12,855 --> 00:03:16,165 They came in last at the Olympics and retired to promote alcoholic drinks. 48 00:03:16,375 --> 00:03:18,809 A true inspiration for the children. 49 00:03:24,815 --> 00:03:26,533 A little help, please? 50 00:03:28,095 --> 00:03:29,847 No! 51 00:03:38,775 --> 00:03:40,128 Oh, what the hell. 52 00:03:40,295 --> 00:03:41,569 [SCREAMS] 53 00:03:42,735 --> 00:03:43,770 [CRASHES] 54 00:03:47,895 --> 00:03:50,204 You poor man. What happened to you? 55 00:03:50,455 --> 00:03:54,243 Well, I was on the triple-diamond slope when suddenly... 56 00:03:54,495 --> 00:03:55,723 Oh, excuse me. 57 00:03:55,975 --> 00:03:57,328 Hello, there. 58 00:03:58,975 --> 00:04:00,374 [SNORES] 59 00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:02,014 Oh! 60 00:04:08,895 --> 00:04:13,810 Nothing like a warm fire and a Super Soaker of fine cognac. 61 00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:17,444 Really puts you in the Christmas spirit. 62 00:04:17,695 --> 00:04:19,094 - What-mas? - Christmas. 63 00:04:19,295 --> 00:04:21,604 You know, "X-M-A-S. " 64 00:04:21,815 --> 00:04:26,013 You mean Xmas. You must be using an archaic pronunciation. 65 00:04:26,215 --> 00:04:28,126 Like when you say "ask" instead of "ax. " 66 00:04:28,335 --> 00:04:30,007 Xmas, huh? 67 00:04:30,815 --> 00:04:34,410 You know, this'll be my first Xmas away from home. 68 00:04:35,055 --> 00:04:36,613 Let me ax you something. 69 00:04:36,855 --> 00:04:39,653 Would it cheer you up if we go get an Xmas tree? 70 00:04:39,895 --> 00:04:42,204 Yeah! An old-fashioned Xmas tree. 71 00:04:42,815 --> 00:04:45,045 FRY: These aren't Xmas trees! 72 00:04:46,615 --> 00:04:48,651 They're like a pine tree. 73 00:04:48,855 --> 00:04:52,211 Pine trees have been extinct for 800 years, Fry. 74 00:04:52,415 --> 00:04:57,205 Gone the way of the poodle and your primitive notions of modesty. 75 00:04:58,015 --> 00:04:59,846 Ah! Brisk. 76 00:05:00,055 --> 00:05:02,250 This isn't the way Christmas is supposed to be. 77 00:05:02,495 --> 00:05:04,770 - There, there. - Everything's changed. 78 00:05:04,975 --> 00:05:07,011 That's not true. 79 00:05:21,815 --> 00:05:25,046 Oh Xmas tree Oh Xmas tree 80 00:05:25,295 --> 00:05:28,810 Bah boo bee boo bah bee bow 81 00:05:31,215 --> 00:05:32,250 Ow! 82 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:35,612 Every Christmas, my mom'd get a goose for goose burgers. 83 00:05:35,815 --> 00:05:40,093 My dad'd whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes. 84 00:05:40,295 --> 00:05:41,125 [CRASH] 85 00:05:41,415 --> 00:05:44,452 This dumb holiday just makes me think of all I left behind. 86 00:05:44,695 --> 00:05:48,244 - Let's just stop talking about Xmas. - Happy Xmas, Xmas people! 87 00:05:48,495 --> 00:05:51,646 Xmas cards have arrived! Xmas! 88 00:05:51,895 --> 00:05:55,171 Amy, there you go. Fry. Professor. Zoidberg. 89 00:05:55,375 --> 00:05:56,808 A mighty haul for Bender. 90 00:05:57,055 --> 00:06:00,411 Yes, I got the most! I win Xmas! 91 00:06:00,615 --> 00:06:04,210 And last but not least, the sweet flower of the office: 92 00:06:04,455 --> 00:06:06,810 Me. Hermes Conrad. 93 00:06:12,775 --> 00:06:14,493 Ah, a picture of my mommy. 94 00:06:14,895 --> 00:06:16,089 Huh? What's this? 95 00:06:16,295 --> 00:06:19,412 A card from my cousin Zoidfarb. 96 00:06:20,655 --> 00:06:23,215 Instead of Claus, he writes "Claws. " 97 00:06:23,415 --> 00:06:28,330 Now that's humorous. Today's comedians could learn from this card. 98 00:06:48,175 --> 00:06:52,248 What's the point of Xmas when everyone you know died 1 000 years ago? 99 00:06:52,495 --> 00:06:54,406 I'm the Ioneliest person on Earth. 100 00:06:54,615 --> 00:06:56,606 Leela, how about a little sympathy? 101 00:07:01,695 --> 00:07:03,526 Yoiks! What was that about? 102 00:07:03,735 --> 00:07:05,726 She's an orphan. 103 00:07:05,975 --> 00:07:10,048 Yes. And the only one of her species in all the known universe. 104 00:07:10,295 --> 00:07:11,853 What a Ionely life. 105 00:07:13,495 --> 00:07:15,611 My God, poor Leela. 106 00:07:15,855 --> 00:07:20,531 Heard you needed cheering up. Well, old Bender will make you laugh. 107 00:07:21,055 --> 00:07:22,613 Look at me, look! 108 00:07:22,815 --> 00:07:24,328 Boo-daba-boo! Be-da-boo! 109 00:07:27,455 --> 00:07:30,094 Man. I got to work on my act. 110 00:07:34,495 --> 00:07:35,723 I feel like a rat. 111 00:07:35,975 --> 00:07:39,854 I've been whining like a pig while Leela was Ionely as a frog. 112 00:07:40,095 --> 00:07:43,007 - I could kick myself. - I'll do it for you. 113 00:07:43,695 --> 00:07:46,653 - Thanks. - You should be ashamed of yourself. 114 00:07:46,895 --> 00:07:50,410 You'd have to be blind not to notice that Leela's a Cyclops. 115 00:07:50,655 --> 00:07:52,805 - Fry's over there, man. - Oh? 116 00:07:55,775 --> 00:08:00,803 Xmas Eve. Another pointless day where I accomplish nothing. 117 00:08:02,975 --> 00:08:05,967 The holiday season is a time of celebration for most. 118 00:08:06,175 --> 00:08:09,929 But it's also a time to remember the sad suffering of the less fortunate. 119 00:08:10,175 --> 00:08:13,167 Earthlings do not yet know suffering. 120 00:08:16,495 --> 00:08:19,965 Earlier today, I visited a shelter for down-and-out robots. 121 00:08:20,495 --> 00:08:22,486 Homeless robots, too poor to afford... 122 00:08:22,735 --> 00:08:25,727 ... even the basic alcohol they need to fuel their circuits. 123 00:08:25,975 --> 00:08:27,408 Is there anything sadder? 124 00:08:27,615 --> 00:08:30,846 Only drowning puppies. And there would have to be a lot of them. 125 00:08:32,495 --> 00:08:33,530 Where you going, Bender? 126 00:08:33,735 --> 00:08:36,568 To volunteer at a liquor kitchen for homeless robots. 127 00:08:36,775 --> 00:08:39,608 Right. As if you ever did anything charitable. 128 00:08:39,815 --> 00:08:42,807 I'm very generous. What about that time I gave blood? 129 00:08:43,015 --> 00:08:45,210 - Whose blood? - Some guy's. 130 00:08:45,455 --> 00:08:48,447 I've got to do something to show Leela how sorry I am. 131 00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:50,253 So, what's the problem? 132 00:08:50,495 --> 00:08:54,613 Simply get down on your claws and do the apology dance. 133 00:08:56,095 --> 00:08:59,690 So it's left, left, right... . Wait! I have a better idea. 134 00:09:00,095 --> 00:09:02,404 I'll go out and get her the perfect Xmas present. 135 00:09:02,655 --> 00:09:05,613 Something so great she'll never be unhappy again. 136 00:09:05,815 --> 00:09:09,046 - Just be back by sundown, man. - We'll see. I like to haggle. 137 00:09:09,295 --> 00:09:11,889 You can't stay out on Xmas Eve. You'll be killed! 138 00:09:12,095 --> 00:09:15,724 - Say what? - He doesn't know about Santa Claus! 139 00:09:15,935 --> 00:09:18,495 I know about Santa Claus. 140 00:09:18,695 --> 00:09:23,007 Back in 2801, the Friendly Robot Company built a robotic Santa... 141 00:09:23,255 --> 00:09:25,644 ...to determine who'd been naughty and who'd been nice... 142 00:09:25,895 --> 00:09:28,011 ...and distribute presents accordingly. 143 00:09:28,215 --> 00:09:29,694 But something went wrong. 144 00:09:29,935 --> 00:09:32,449 Wow. 2801. Anyway... 145 00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:34,008 Wait, you fool! 146 00:09:34,215 --> 00:09:37,844 Due to a programming error, Santa's standards were set too high... 147 00:09:38,095 --> 00:09:40,814 ...and he invariably judges everyone to be naughty. 148 00:09:41,015 --> 00:09:43,609 If he catches you after dark, he'll chop off your head... 149 00:09:43,855 --> 00:09:46,927 ...and stuff your neck full of toys from his sack of horrors! 150 00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:49,574 [GULPS] 151 00:09:49,775 --> 00:09:51,493 Nice meeting you. 152 00:09:57,895 --> 00:10:01,683 Welcome, brother. May the blessings of the season be upon you. 153 00:10:01,895 --> 00:10:06,207 I'm one of those lazy homeless bums I've been hearing about. 154 00:10:06,455 --> 00:10:08,810 Can you point me to the free booze? 155 00:10:09,175 --> 00:10:10,767 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. 156 00:10:13,495 --> 00:10:17,010 I really like this girl but she thinks I'm a jerk. Can you help me? 157 00:10:17,215 --> 00:10:19,251 There's a suicide booth in the Food Court. 158 00:10:19,495 --> 00:10:20,928 Though there's a line this time of year. 159 00:10:21,175 --> 00:10:22,528 No, I need to get her a gift. 160 00:10:22,735 --> 00:10:24,691 And I need it before sundown. 161 00:10:24,895 --> 00:10:26,806 You can't go wrong with something traditional. 162 00:10:27,015 --> 00:10:31,805 A surface-to-Santa rocket launcher. Comes with 3 jolly-seeking missiles. 163 00:10:32,095 --> 00:10:34,973 - That's funny. - Careful, sir. 164 00:10:40,055 --> 00:10:44,048 Oh, yeah. You filthy hobos sure know how to live. 165 00:10:44,295 --> 00:10:47,810 Hey, chief? Someone's stealing your handkerchief full of crap. 166 00:10:49,975 --> 00:10:50,964 Excuse me, sir. 167 00:10:51,175 --> 00:10:52,733 Might I have a sip of booze? 168 00:10:53,215 --> 00:10:57,003 I'm sorry, Tinny Tim. Seems we ran out early tonight. 169 00:10:57,215 --> 00:10:58,330 I understand. 170 00:10:59,895 --> 00:11:02,807 My God, that poor kid. Ha, ha, ha! 171 00:11:03,495 --> 00:11:06,931 You're the last store open. I need something for my friend, Leela. 172 00:11:08,055 --> 00:11:09,044 [GROANS] 173 00:11:10,215 --> 00:11:10,886 [GROANS] 174 00:11:12,175 --> 00:11:13,130 [GROANS] 175 00:11:13,455 --> 00:11:16,288 - Just give me your best animal. - Best is a matter of opinion. 176 00:11:16,615 --> 00:11:18,412 I personally like the electric snail. 177 00:11:19,735 --> 00:11:23,444 That's a stupid animal. You're stupid. I said I want the best one. 178 00:11:23,695 --> 00:11:26,004 Which costs more, the parrot or the lizard? 179 00:11:26,255 --> 00:11:28,815 The lizards are a buck each. The parrot is $500. 180 00:11:29,015 --> 00:11:31,245 That's a hell of a good parrot. 181 00:11:31,495 --> 00:11:34,612 Although, I could get 500 lizards for the same price. 182 00:11:34,855 --> 00:11:36,288 Girls like swarms of lizards, right? 183 00:11:36,495 --> 00:11:39,089 Sir, the store is closing in 2 minutes. 184 00:11:39,295 --> 00:11:41,411 Okay. I'll take the 500 lizards. 185 00:11:41,655 --> 00:11:46,012 No, wait. Yes. No. Yes. Yes. Yes! 186 00:11:46,255 --> 00:11:47,529 The parrot! 187 00:11:49,895 --> 00:11:53,205 I spent every penny I had, but I bet Leela's going to love you. 188 00:11:53,415 --> 00:11:54,768 [SQUAWKS] 189 00:11:54,975 --> 00:11:57,409 You're quite the talker, huh? 190 00:11:58,015 --> 00:11:59,607 Shut the hell up! Ow! 191 00:12:01,215 --> 00:12:03,775 Stupid bird! I know where you live! 192 00:12:11,655 --> 00:12:12,929 Hey, it's Leela! 193 00:12:13,135 --> 00:12:16,650 Sorry I stormed out before. I didn't mean to ruin everyone's Xmas. 194 00:12:16,855 --> 00:12:18,447 You were gone? 195 00:12:18,655 --> 00:12:21,806 I get tired of Fry always only thinking of himself. 196 00:12:22,015 --> 00:12:22,925 I hear that. 197 00:12:23,135 --> 00:12:28,163 I ax him to set the table. And he goes out to buy you a present. Selfish dog. 198 00:12:28,375 --> 00:12:31,253 Wait. He's still out? His life's in danger! 199 00:12:31,495 --> 00:12:33,406 - Why? - I'm telling you why. 200 00:12:33,615 --> 00:12:36,413 Santa Claus is coming to town! 201 00:12:44,855 --> 00:12:45,844 All right, bird. 202 00:12:46,255 --> 00:12:51,249 You thought you'd beat me in a game of wits, but you just met your equal. 203 00:12:58,415 --> 00:12:59,564 [GULPS] 204 00:13:14,055 --> 00:13:15,044 Cornered! 205 00:13:21,455 --> 00:13:22,490 [SCREAMS] 206 00:13:22,655 --> 00:13:23,974 Phew! 207 00:13:32,215 --> 00:13:34,649 - Hi, there. - Leela? Oh, my God. 208 00:13:34,895 --> 00:13:38,490 You saved my life. I am going to get you so many lizards. 209 00:13:40,655 --> 00:13:42,611 You didn't need to buy me a present. 210 00:13:42,855 --> 00:13:44,811 I just wanted to make you happy. 211 00:13:45,215 --> 00:13:48,605 I miss my family, but you never even had a family. 212 00:13:48,815 --> 00:13:51,249 It's okay. You're Ionely, and I'm Ionely. 213 00:13:51,495 --> 00:13:54,407 But together, we're Ionely together. 214 00:13:54,655 --> 00:13:58,204 - Merry Xmas, Leela. - Merry Xmas. 215 00:13:58,375 --> 00:13:59,649 [METAL CLANKING] 216 00:14:01,415 --> 00:14:03,371 Oh, boy! It's Santa! 217 00:14:03,775 --> 00:14:07,404 Ho, ho, ho! 218 00:14:11,775 --> 00:14:15,324 You've been very naughty, Fry and Leela. I checked my list. 219 00:14:15,535 --> 00:14:16,445 Well, check it twice. 220 00:14:16,655 --> 00:14:19,044 I perform over 50 mega-checks per second. 221 00:14:19,255 --> 00:14:22,486 You're both naughty for disregarding each others' feelings. 222 00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:26,051 But we set things right. Fry even risked his life to get me a present. 223 00:14:26,255 --> 00:14:28,405 But what about your other co-workers? 224 00:14:28,615 --> 00:14:32,972 Did either of you ever stop to think about Doctor Zoidberg's feelings? 225 00:14:33,135 --> 00:14:34,045 No, I swear! 226 00:14:34,255 --> 00:14:38,726 Santa has something very special in his sack for you. 227 00:14:40,895 --> 00:14:43,125 Ho, ho, ho! 228 00:14:46,455 --> 00:14:49,333 So lock the door and hit the floor 229 00:14:49,535 --> 00:14:51,605 Because Santa Claus comes tonight 230 00:14:52,975 --> 00:14:54,772 - Go away. - Whoa. Hold on. 231 00:14:54,975 --> 00:14:58,206 What about the traditional glass of hard cider? 232 00:14:58,655 --> 00:15:02,204 Oh, all right. But just one glass. 233 00:15:05,655 --> 00:15:08,408 [DRINKING] 234 00:15:09,695 --> 00:15:11,606 Okay, that's enough. 235 00:15:12,095 --> 00:15:15,007 I said, that's enough! 236 00:15:15,215 --> 00:15:16,204 Get her purse! 237 00:15:27,695 --> 00:15:30,289 Let us live! We'll put out cookies for you! 238 00:15:30,495 --> 00:15:33,214 You dare bribe Santa? 239 00:15:33,415 --> 00:15:37,090 I'll shove coal so far up your stocking, you'll cough up diamonds! 240 00:15:51,415 --> 00:15:52,768 We're trapped. 241 00:15:53,015 --> 00:15:56,530 I never thought it'd end this way, gunned down by Santa Claus. 242 00:15:56,735 --> 00:15:58,134 Honestly, I didn't see it coming. 243 00:16:00,935 --> 00:16:03,608 - Goodbye, Fry. - Goodbye, Leela. 244 00:16:04,295 --> 00:16:06,809 Hey, look. We're under the mistletoe. 245 00:16:12,375 --> 00:16:16,209 Your mistletoe is no match for my T.O.W. missile. 246 00:16:25,655 --> 00:16:28,533 Your present may need some assembly. 247 00:16:28,735 --> 00:16:32,125 On the fourth day of Xmas I stole from that lady 248 00:16:32,495 --> 00:16:33,689 Four family photos 249 00:16:33,895 --> 00:16:35,214 Three jars of pennies 250 00:16:35,415 --> 00:16:36,848 Two former husbands 251 00:16:37,095 --> 00:16:40,804 And a slipper on a shoe tree 252 00:16:42,295 --> 00:16:43,569 Oh, thank you! 253 00:16:43,855 --> 00:16:46,050 - Help! - Somebody help us! 254 00:16:46,295 --> 00:16:48,729 It's humans! Shall we mug them, robot, sir? 255 00:16:48,975 --> 00:16:52,604 No, wait. I know these guys. They got nothing! 256 00:16:53,935 --> 00:16:56,051 Ho, ho, ho! 257 00:16:56,935 --> 00:16:59,005 You've been very naughty, Bender! 258 00:16:59,215 --> 00:17:01,968 I didn't do nothing. You're thinking of the kid. 259 00:17:02,175 --> 00:17:05,053 My God, Bender. Framing an orphan? 260 00:17:05,255 --> 00:17:09,885 That's so naughty I'll have to add it to my list right now. 261 00:17:10,695 --> 00:17:12,413 Framing... . 262 00:17:13,055 --> 00:17:14,124 I... 263 00:17:14,375 --> 00:17:15,649 ...N... 264 00:17:15,895 --> 00:17:17,806 ...G... . 265 00:17:20,895 --> 00:17:22,487 Amy, this is for you. 266 00:17:22,695 --> 00:17:25,084 A set of combs for your beautiful hair. 267 00:17:25,295 --> 00:17:27,047 Oh, that's so sweet. 268 00:17:27,295 --> 00:17:31,334 But I sold my hair to a wigmaker to buy a set of combs for Hermes. 269 00:17:31,575 --> 00:17:32,928 Oh, the irony. 270 00:17:33,175 --> 00:17:36,565 I sold my hair so I could buy this third set of combs for Zoidberg. 271 00:17:36,775 --> 00:17:37,685 Thank you. 272 00:17:37,895 --> 00:17:40,125 These'll come in handy for my new hair. 273 00:17:41,295 --> 00:17:44,253 Finally I look as pretty as I feel. 274 00:17:44,455 --> 00:17:45,854 Help! 275 00:17:50,855 --> 00:17:53,415 Oh, dear, they'll be killed on our doorstep. 276 00:17:53,655 --> 00:17:57,204 And there's no trash pickup till January 3rd. 277 00:17:58,575 --> 00:18:00,372 [THUD] 278 00:18:00,575 --> 00:18:03,328 Sweet manatee of Galilee! He's on the roof! 279 00:18:05,095 --> 00:18:07,609 Quick! The armor-plated chimney cover! 280 00:18:10,135 --> 00:18:11,124 Push! Push! 281 00:18:11,335 --> 00:18:12,404 Use teamwork! 282 00:18:20,055 --> 00:18:21,807 Oh, dear! Oh, dear! 283 00:18:25,695 --> 00:18:29,051 You've all been very naughty. Very naughty, indeed. 284 00:18:29,295 --> 00:18:30,694 Except you, Doctor Zoidberg. 285 00:18:30,895 --> 00:18:34,410 - This is for you. - A pogo stick. 286 00:18:35,775 --> 00:18:40,246 As for the rest of you, I'll tear off your skin like wrapping paper... 287 00:18:40,495 --> 00:18:42,929 ...and deck the halls with your guts. 288 00:18:43,135 --> 00:18:46,047 Yeah? Well, I don't believe in Santa Claus. 289 00:18:46,255 --> 00:18:50,328 Come on, everybody. If you don't believe in him, he can't hurt you. 290 00:18:50,575 --> 00:18:52,611 Oh, God, the pain! 291 00:18:52,775 --> 00:18:53,764 Ho, ho, ho! 292 00:18:53,975 --> 00:18:59,811 Time to get jolly on your naughty asses. Ho, ho, ho! 293 00:19:00,895 --> 00:19:04,331 Watch out, his belly's shaking like a bowl full of nitroglycerine. 294 00:19:06,215 --> 00:19:08,524 - Rudolph's nose! - He's going to blow! 295 00:19:37,695 --> 00:19:39,925 Good thing I got us out of that one. 296 00:19:40,135 --> 00:19:42,205 Xmas dinner, everyone. 297 00:19:43,575 --> 00:19:46,453 Bender, where did you get that bird? 298 00:19:46,695 --> 00:19:49,653 I found it lying in the street, like all the food I cook. 299 00:19:49,895 --> 00:19:51,806 Dig in, everyone! 300 00:19:54,295 --> 00:19:56,365 - Thank you, sir. - You got the toenail. 301 00:20:02,375 --> 00:20:04,013 [BELCHES] 302 00:20:04,255 --> 00:20:05,085 Oh! 303 00:20:05,295 --> 00:20:07,172 Look, the food isn't what's important. 304 00:20:07,375 --> 00:20:08,364 I'm so hungry. 305 00:20:08,575 --> 00:20:11,408 The important thing is, we're all together for Xmas. 306 00:20:11,615 --> 00:20:15,051 And even though I'm surrounded by robots and monsters and old people... 307 00:20:15,495 --> 00:20:17,213 ...I've never felt more at home. 308 00:20:17,455 --> 00:20:21,528 Hear, hear! Now, let's all of us shut up and sing! 309 00:20:22,695 --> 00:20:24,811 He knows when you are sleeping 310 00:20:25,095 --> 00:20:27,211 He knows when you're on the can 311 00:20:27,455 --> 00:20:31,653 He'll hunt you down and blast your ass From here to Pakistan 312 00:20:32,415 --> 00:20:34,610 You'd better not breathe You'd better not move 313 00:20:34,855 --> 00:20:36,925 You're better off dead I'm telling you, dude 314 00:20:37,295 --> 00:20:41,174 Santa Claus is gunning you down 315 00:20:44,095 --> 00:20:47,405 Merry Xmas, everyone! 316 00:21:08,055 --> 00:21:12,128 I'll be back. Back when you least expect it. 317 00:21:12,335 --> 00:21:16,010 Next Xmas! 318 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net 319 00:21:17,305 --> 00:22:17,694 Watch Movies, TV Series & Live Sports www.admitme.app