1
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:06,471
[ Man ]
ONE, TWO! ONE, TWO, THREE!
2
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:14,074
Watch Movies, TV Series & Live Sports
www.admitme.app
3
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[ Humming ]
WHOO-HOO! HA!
4
00:00:38,172 --> 00:00:40,872
WHOA!
[ Yelps ]
5
00:00:40,941 --> 00:00:44,943
SCHMAN, THE GREAT RAD SPOT IS
MEGA-SWEET FOR PARTY BOARDING.
6
00:00:45,012 --> 00:00:47,495
- INDEED.
- ANY CALLS WHILE I WAS OUT?
7
00:00:47,564 --> 00:00:52,284
YEAH. YOU GOT
A TELESONIC TRANSMISSION
FROM KIF A COUPLE HOURS AGO.
8
00:00:52,352 --> 00:00:55,287
[ Gasps ]
MY KIFFY CALLED?
9
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,257
KIF?
OOH, AMY, YOU'RE BACK.
10
00:00:59,326 --> 00:01:01,560
ANOTHER HOUR,
AND I WOULD'VE THOUGHT
ABOUT HANGING UP.
11
00:01:01,629 --> 00:01:04,829
- WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST
LEAVE A MESSAGE, SWEETIE?
- WELL, UM,
12
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:09,768
I'VE LEFT HUNDREDS OF MESSAGES
WITH YOUR ANSWERING MACHINE,
BUT YOU NEVER SEEM TO GET THEM.
13
00:01:09,836 --> 00:01:13,338
- BENDER!
- IT'S NOT MY FAULT
IF YOU DON'T CHECK ME.
14
00:01:13,406 --> 00:01:17,709
[ Garbled Audio ]
MESSAGES ERASED.
15
00:01:17,778 --> 00:01:22,547
OH, DEAREST, THIS
LONG-DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP
IS TOO MUCH TO BEAR.
16
00:01:22,616 --> 00:01:26,017
WHEN EVEN AN INCH SEPARATES US,
I QUIVER WITH MISERY,
[ Humming ]
17
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:30,021
SO YOU CAN IMAGINE HOW I FEEL
WHEN IT'S A BILLION LIGHT-YEARS.
18
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:35,110
- [ Crying ]
- KIF, DON'T CRY, OR YOU'LL
GET A TUMMY ACHE.
19
00:01:35,179 --> 00:01:39,114
LIEUTENANT, SOME THINGS CAME
OFF ME AND CLOGGED THE DRAIN,
SO IF YOU COULD--
20
00:01:39,199 --> 00:01:42,433
OH, HO!
WHAT'S THIS?
21
00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:45,253
[ Electronic Whirring ]
WELL, WELL, WELL.
22
00:01:45,322 --> 00:01:49,641
DO MY EYES BELIEVE ME, OR
IS THAT MY BOSOMY SWAN, LEELA?
23
00:01:49,710 --> 00:01:53,145
SAY AGAIN?
YOU'RE BREAKING UP.
24
00:01:53,213 --> 00:01:56,514
- OHH!
- GOOD NEWS, EVERYONE.
25
00:01:56,583 --> 00:02:00,818
YOU'LL BE DELIVERING
PAIN MEDICINE TO THE HIVE MIND
OF NIGEL 7!
26
00:02:01,989 --> 00:02:04,872
SCRUFFY'S ROLLIN'
OUT A LARGE PILL.
27
00:02:04,941 --> 00:02:08,676
YOU'RE GOING TO NIGEL 7?
KIF'S ON PATROL NEAR THERE.
28
00:02:08,745 --> 00:02:11,813
- YOU COULD DROP ME OFF
ON THE WAY!
- WE COULD, BUT WE WON'T!
29
00:02:11,882 --> 00:02:14,716
IT'S A SPACESHIP,
DAMN IT, NOT A PROM LIMOUSINE!
30
00:02:14,785 --> 00:02:19,771
[ Growls ]
IF ANYONE NEEDS ME,
I'LL BE IN THE ANGRY DOME.
31
00:02:22,576 --> 00:02:25,560
[ Muttering Angrily,
Indistinct ]
32
00:02:28,599 --> 00:02:31,749
THIS IS A VERY LONG TRIP,
SO WE'LL ALL HAVE TO GO...
33
00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:34,803
INTO HIBERNATIVE NAPTOSIS
TO SAVE OXYGEN.
34
00:02:34,871 --> 00:02:38,356
[ Groans ]
I DON'T EVEN BREATHE...
[ Muttering ] OXYGEN.
35
00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:47,198
- [ Snoring ]
- [ Snoring ]
36
00:02:49,469 --> 00:02:51,837
[ Rattling ]
37
00:03:03,534 --> 00:03:06,551
HERE I COME, KIF.
38
00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:09,187
[ Amy Laughs Maniacally ]
39
00:03:12,993 --> 00:03:16,812
OH! [ Chortles ]
THEY JUMPED RIGHT OUT
OF THEIR PANTS!
40
00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:20,766
[ Alarm Blaring ]
41
00:03:20,834 --> 00:03:24,535
OH, WHAT NOW?
ACTIVATE GLASS WINDOW.
42
00:03:27,007 --> 00:03:31,243
- [ Gasps ]
- KIF, I'M SENSING A SENSUAL
DISTURBANCE IN THE FORCE.
43
00:03:31,311 --> 00:03:35,913
- PREPARE FOR
SHIP-TO-SHIP INTIMACY.
- YES, SIR, CAPTAIN.
44
00:03:47,611 --> 00:03:50,528
[ Nibbler Sighs ]
[ Leela Snores ]
45
00:03:50,597 --> 00:03:52,814
[ Loud Clank ]
[ Nibbler Squeals ]
46
00:03:52,883 --> 00:03:56,918
[ Leela Gasps, Screams ]
HOW 'BOUT I HELP YOU FINISH THAT
DREAM YOU WERE HAVING ABOUT ME?
47
00:03:56,987 --> 00:04:00,988
OKAY. I WAS JUST
AT THIS PART--
[ Karate Yells ]
48
00:04:01,057 --> 00:04:05,826
OHH, LET'S TRY THAT
A LITTLE LOWER AND A LOT SOFTER.
49
00:04:05,895 --> 00:04:10,632
IMAGINE YOU STOWING AWAY AND
STEALING A LICENSED STARSHIP!
50
00:04:10,701 --> 00:04:14,452
OH, IT'S SO ROMANTIC.
IT GIVES ME THE SHIVERS.
[ Shivering ]
51
00:04:14,521 --> 00:04:18,556
I DON'T CARE HOW MUCH TROUBLE
I GET IN. I NEEDED
TO FEEL MY LIPS PRESSED...
52
00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:22,076
AGAINST
YOUR LIPLESS BEAK.
53
00:04:22,145 --> 00:04:25,947
OH, AMY, I CAN'T STAND
HAVING A WHOLE UNIVERSE
BETWEEN US.
54
00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:30,585
I'VE BEEN THINKING A LOT
ABOUT THIS, AND, WELL,
WOULD YOU MOVE IN WITH ME?
55
00:04:30,653 --> 00:04:35,090
H-HERE? BUT, UH,
WOULDN'T IT BE CROWDED?
56
00:04:35,158 --> 00:04:37,942
OH, NO, NO.
IT'S REALLY TWICE THE SIZE.
57
00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:42,947
YOU CAN USE THE FLOOR,
AND I'LL HAVE THE CEILING.
SEE?
58
00:04:43,016 --> 00:04:48,653
[ Chuckling ] KIF,
YOU HAVE SO MUCH CREATIVITY
AND NICENESS,
59
00:04:48,722 --> 00:04:51,356
BUT I'M NOT SURE
IF I--
[ Grunts ] HUSH.
60
00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:54,643
BEFORE YOU ANSWER,
COME THITHER.
61
00:04:54,711 --> 00:04:57,162
[ Kif ]
THIS IS THE HOLO-SHED.
62
00:04:57,230 --> 00:05:01,833
IT CAN SIMULATE
ANYTHING YOU DESIRE,
AND NOTHING CAN HURT YOU,
63
00:05:01,902 --> 00:05:04,936
EXCEPT WHEN IT MALFUNCTIONS
AND THE HOLOGRAMS BECOME REAL.
64
00:05:05,005 --> 00:05:07,406
WELL, THAT PROBABLY
WON'T HAPPEN THIS TIME.
65
00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:11,209
I WANTED TO SHOW YOU
WHAT LIFE COULD BE LIKE
IF WE WERE TOGETHER.
66
00:05:11,278 --> 00:05:14,179
COMPUTER,
RUN PROGRAM "KIF ONE."
67
00:05:14,247 --> 00:05:16,414
[ Electronic Warbling ]
68
00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:20,551
[ Gasps ]
THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL!
69
00:05:20,620 --> 00:05:23,938
SPIRIT! KIF,
THAT'S THE PONY
I ALWAYS WANTED,
70
00:05:24,007 --> 00:05:26,607
BUT MY PARENTS SAID
I HAD TOO MANY PONIES
ALREADY!
71
00:05:26,677 --> 00:05:29,528
YES. I PROGRAMMED
IT IN FOR YOU.
72
00:05:29,596 --> 00:05:32,146
FOUR MILLION LINES OF BASIC.
73
00:05:32,215 --> 00:05:35,767
AND IF THIS ISN'T THE LIFE
YOU WANT, HOW 'BOUT THIS?
74
00:05:35,836 --> 00:05:37,769
RUN PROGRAM "KIF TWO."
75
00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:39,754
[ Electronic Warbling ]
76
00:05:39,823 --> 00:05:43,058
OH, KIF!
WE COULD LIVE HERE
AT THE SHORE...
77
00:05:43,126 --> 00:05:46,360
OF THE TRANQUILIBRIUS SEA
IN A TIME-SHARE.
78
00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:52,216
AND I WOULD PLUCK THE MOON
FROM THE SKY JUST
TO SEE YOU SMILE.
79
00:05:52,285 --> 00:05:54,753
[ Grunting ]
ALMOST GOT IT.
80
00:05:54,821 --> 00:05:58,256
[ Continues Grunting ]
IT SEEMS TO BE SORT OF...
STUCK.
81
00:05:58,324 --> 00:06:01,226
OOH! I LOVE YOU!
82
00:06:02,229 --> 00:06:06,064
[ Gurgling, Grunting,
Choking ]
83
00:06:06,133 --> 00:06:09,818
RUN PROGRAM "KIF://3."
[ Coughing ]
84
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:16,057
THIS ISN'T BAD.
MY AUNT HAD A PLACE
LIKE THIS.
85
00:06:16,126 --> 00:06:19,428
AMY, WE COULD LIVE
IN A BUS STATION BATHROOM
FOR ALL I CARE.
86
00:06:19,496 --> 00:06:23,080
AS LONG AS WE'RE TOGETHER,
IT'LL FEEL LIKE A CASTLE
TO ME.
87
00:06:23,149 --> 00:06:28,486
KIF, I'D LOVE TO LIVE
WITH YOU... SOMEDAY,
88
00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:31,406
BUT BEFORE THEN,
THERE'S STILL LOTS
I WANNA DO ON MY OWN.
89
00:06:31,475 --> 00:06:34,759
[ Electronic Interference,
Arcing ]
WHAT WAS THAT?
90
00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:38,697
OH, DEAR.
I FEAR THE HOLO-SHED
MIGHT BE BROKEN AGAIN.
91
00:06:38,765 --> 00:06:43,451
- WELL, AS LONG AS WE DON'T
CROSS PATHS WITH ATTILA THE--
- [ Roars ]
92
00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:46,354
[ Kif Sighs ]
LOOK! SPIRIT!
93
00:06:46,423 --> 00:06:48,389
[ Neighs Viciously ]
94
00:06:48,475 --> 00:06:51,592
[ Kif ]
AND THERE'S PROFESSOR MORIARTY!
JACK THE RIPPER!
95
00:06:51,661 --> 00:06:55,079
EVIL LINCOLN!
[ Cackles ]
96
00:06:55,148 --> 00:06:58,199
RIGHTO, GENTS.
IT'S ANOTHER SIMULATION
GONE MAD,
97
00:06:58,268 --> 00:07:01,168
SO MURDER AND MAYHEM--
STANDARD PROCEDURE.
98
00:07:01,237 --> 00:07:03,905
[ All Yelling,
Indistinct ]
99
00:07:05,859 --> 00:07:10,862
YOUR HOLOGRAPHIC-SIMULATED
EVIL LINCOLN IS BACK!
100
00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:13,431
[ Growls ]
[ Electrical Arcing ]
101
00:07:13,499 --> 00:07:15,317
[ Kif, Amy Whimpering ]
102
00:07:17,403 --> 00:07:21,223
[ Amy Whimpering ]
THE HOLO-SHED'S
ON THE FRITZ AGAIN.
103
00:07:21,291 --> 00:07:24,259
- THE CHARACTERS TURNED REAL!
- DAMN. THE LAST TIME
THAT HAPPENED,
104
00:07:24,328 --> 00:07:26,361
I GOT SLAPPED
WITH THREE PATERNITY SUITS.
105
00:07:26,430 --> 00:07:29,814
- [ Spirit Neighs ]
- [ All Gasping ]
106
00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:32,917
[ Leela ] OH, MY GOD!
LISTEN UP, HISTORY'S
GREATEST VILLAINS.
107
00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:36,287
GET BACK
INTO THE HOLO-SHED
BEFORE I START BLASTING.
108
00:07:36,356 --> 00:07:40,442
STOP! NO SHOOT FIRE STICK
IN SPACE CANOE!
109
00:07:40,511 --> 00:07:42,610
CAUSE EXPLOSIVE DECOMPRESSION!
110
00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:47,282
SPARE ME
YOUR SPACE-AGE TECHNOBABBLE,
ATTILA THE HUN.
111
00:07:47,351 --> 00:07:51,686
[ All Gasping, Screaming ]
112
00:07:51,755 --> 00:07:54,706
[ Continue Screaming ]
113
00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:57,642
[ All Yelping ]
114
00:07:57,710 --> 00:07:59,911
D'OH!
HEY.
115
00:07:59,979 --> 00:08:02,897
[ All Continue Yelping ]
116
00:08:02,966 --> 00:08:06,434
- [ Yelping ]
- KIF, HOLD ON!
117
00:08:06,503 --> 00:08:08,636
I TOTALLY WANT TO.
[ Gasps ]
118
00:08:08,705 --> 00:08:11,505
[ Yelping ]
119
00:08:11,574 --> 00:08:13,908
[ Kif Yelps ]
[ Leela ]
GRAB ON!
120
00:08:13,977 --> 00:08:16,577
PLEASE-- PLEASE HOLD ME.
OH!
OVER HERE!
121
00:08:16,646 --> 00:08:19,631
- [ Kif Screams ]
- HAVE A GOOD ONE!
122
00:08:20,817 --> 00:08:24,084
- [ Kif Grunts ]
OH.
- [ All Grunt ]
123
00:08:24,153 --> 00:08:26,938
[ Bender ]
AH, MAN!
PHEW!
124
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:31,292
AFTER ALL THAT,
I COULD USE SOME RELAXATION.
I'LL BE IN THE HOLO-SHED.
125
00:08:37,033 --> 00:08:40,100
[ Electronic Whirring ]
126
00:08:40,169 --> 00:08:44,139
WELL, EXCEPT FOR
A FEW BROKEN BONES,
127
00:08:44,207 --> 00:08:48,760
SOME INTERNAL HEMORRHAGING
AND A PARTIALLY BARFED-UP HEART,
EVERYONE APPEARS FINE.
128
00:08:48,829 --> 00:08:52,497
- [ All ]
PHEW!
- OH, AND KIF IS PREGNANT.
129
00:08:52,565 --> 00:08:55,000
- [ Gasps ]
- [ All Gasping ]
130
00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:57,752
OH, JOY!
131
00:09:03,560 --> 00:09:06,511
AMY, ISN'T IT WONDERFUL?
I'M PREGNANT!
132
00:09:06,579 --> 00:09:10,431
YES, IT'S GREAT--
A GREAT MIRACLE.
133
00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:14,251
AND NOT ONE OF THOSE BOGUS,
EVERYDAY MIRACLES,
LIKE A SUNRISE.
134
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:16,488
AREN'T YOU A MALE?
YEAH. WHAT'S THE DEAL?
135
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:20,258
JUST WHEN I THOUGHT I'D FIGURED
OUT YOU BIOLOGICAL CREATURES,
IT'S SOMETHIN' ELSE!
136
00:09:20,326 --> 00:09:23,528
LET ME AT 'IM!
GET OVER HERE, KIF!
137
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:27,599
- [ Sputtering Angrily ]
- LOOK. I'M SURE WE'RE ALL
A LITTLE UNCLEAR...
138
00:09:27,668 --> 00:09:31,002
ON HOW ANYONE
GETS PREGNANT,
SO, KIF, PRAY EXPLAIN.
139
00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:33,854
AND DON'T
SPARE THE DIRTY WORDS
WHERE APPROPRIATE.
140
00:09:33,923 --> 00:09:36,257
WELL, IT'S QUITE SIMPLE,
REALLY.
141
00:09:36,325 --> 00:09:39,761
WHEN ONE OF MY SPECIES
EXPERIENCES DEEP FEELINGS
OF LOVE,
142
00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:42,446
WE ENTER A SO-CALLED
"RECEPTIVE STATE."
143
00:09:42,515 --> 00:09:44,899
YOU DISGUST ME. GO ON.
144
00:09:44,968 --> 00:09:49,137
AT THAT POINT,
OUR SKIN BECOMES
A SEMIPERMEABLE MEMBRANE...
145
00:09:49,205 --> 00:09:52,407
WHICH ALLOWS THE PASSAGE
OF GENETIC MATERIAL.
146
00:09:52,476 --> 00:09:55,243
I HELD AMY'S HAND,
AND VOILÀ.
147
00:09:55,312 --> 00:09:58,830
WELL, OKAY,
BUT THAT BETTER
BE ALL THERE IS.
148
00:09:58,898 --> 00:10:02,801
OH, AMY,
YOU'LL BE A MOTHER!
149
00:10:06,673 --> 00:10:11,375
WHAT A WONDROUS AFFIRMATION
OF OUR LOVE AND ALL
FROM THE TOUCH OF YOUR HAND.
150
00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:13,678
[ Giggles ]
DUDE, HOLD UP.
151
00:10:13,746 --> 00:10:16,614
REMEMBER WHEN ZAPP
BLEW A HOLE IN THE SHIP?
INDEED.
152
00:10:16,683 --> 00:10:20,001
KIF TOUCHED EVERYBODY THERE.
COULDN'T ANY ONE OF US
BE THE MOTHER?
153
00:10:20,069 --> 00:10:23,471
HEY, YEAH! I MEAN,
WHAT ABOUT THAT, KIF?
154
00:10:23,557 --> 00:10:26,457
WELL, I SUPPOSE I MIGHT'VE
GOTTEN PREGNANT THAT WAY.
155
00:10:26,526 --> 00:10:28,459
OR EVEN FROM A TOILET SEAT--
156
00:10:28,511 --> 00:10:31,763
THOUGH THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE, SINCE
I HAVE A PRIVATE WASHROOM.
157
00:10:31,832 --> 00:10:34,749
[ Toilet Flushes ]
AH, MY HOME
AWAY FROM HOME.
158
00:10:34,818 --> 00:10:39,287
BY THE WAY, KIF,
YOUR FLUSH SEEMS TO BE SET
ON "STUN," NOT "KILL."
159
00:10:39,356 --> 00:10:42,506
[ Stuttering ]
160
00:10:42,575 --> 00:10:47,178
LOOK, KIF,
I PROBABLY AM THE MOTHER--
ALTHOUGH MAYBE I'M NOT.
161
00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:51,583
OF COURSE, I HOPE I AM,
BUT JUST IN CASE I'M NOT,
MAYBE WE SHOULD HAVE A TEST.
162
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:54,652
A TEST!
I DEMAND A TEST!
163
00:10:58,624 --> 00:11:04,111
[ Farnsworth ] EVEN I LAUGHED
AT ME WHEN I BUILT THIS ALIEN
CROSS-SPECIES GENETIC ANALYZER,
164
00:11:04,180 --> 00:11:06,447
BUT I GUESS
I SHOWED MYSELF.
165
00:11:06,516 --> 00:11:09,650
SUBJECTS,
PLEASE ENTER THE CHAMBER.
166
00:11:14,457 --> 00:11:17,542
NOW, TO TAKE
A D.N.A. SAMPLE.
167
00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:20,244
OOH!
168
00:11:20,313 --> 00:11:23,514
[ Inhales Sharply ]
169
00:11:25,652 --> 00:11:31,255
WHEN I PULL THIS SWITCH,
THE MATERNIFUGE WILL SPIN
AT 10,000 R.P.M.,
170
00:11:31,324 --> 00:11:34,425
SEPARATING OUT EVERYONE
WHO ISN'T THE MOTHER--
171
00:11:34,494 --> 00:11:37,528
UH, FATHER--
UH, WHATEVER.
172
00:11:37,597 --> 00:11:42,700
[ Mechanism Whirring ]
[ All Yelping ]
173
00:11:42,769 --> 00:11:45,236
- WHOA!
- FASTER! FASTER!
174
00:11:50,577 --> 00:11:52,827
[ Gurgling ]
175
00:11:52,896 --> 00:11:58,850
- [ Grunts ]
- GOOD! FRY'S EJECTION INDICATES
THAT HE IS NOT THE MAN-MAMA.
176
00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:02,302
- [ Grunts, Yelps ]
- [ Fry Yelps ]
177
00:12:02,371 --> 00:12:05,906
NOR IS CAPTAIN BRANIGAN.
OH, THANK YOU,
MERCIFUL GOD.
178
00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:08,492
[ Trills, Groans ]
179
00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:11,896
ZOIDBERG, WHAT THE HELL
WERE YOU DOING IN THERE?
180
00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:15,233
THAT'S WHERE I LIVE.
I HAVE NO HOME.
181
00:12:19,105 --> 00:12:22,957
[ Amy Screams, Grunts ]
182
00:12:23,026 --> 00:12:25,559
AMY? BUT THAT MEANS--
183
00:12:33,102 --> 00:12:37,421
LEELA MUST HAVE
IMPREGNATED ME WHEN
SHE GRABBED MY UNGLOVED HAND.
184
00:12:37,491 --> 00:12:41,375
THAT EXPLAINS
THE POSTER IN HYGIENE CLASS:
"NO GLOVE, NO LOVE."
185
00:12:41,444 --> 00:12:44,145
WOW. THIS IS ALL
SO CONFUSING.
186
00:12:44,214 --> 00:12:50,084
LEELA, HOW COULD YOU?
OUR LOVE HAS HAD TO ENDURE YOUR
CONSTANT HATRED AND NOW THIS?
187
00:12:50,153 --> 00:12:54,472
STOP TESTING OUR LOVE!
OH, PLEASE, CAPTAIN.
188
00:12:54,540 --> 00:12:58,693
I THANK LEELA
FOR THE D.N.A. SHE GAVE ME,
BUT IN MY SPECIES,
189
00:12:58,762 --> 00:13:02,663
THE TRUE PARENT
IS THE ONE WHO INSPIRED
THE INITIAL FEELING OF LOVE.
190
00:13:02,732 --> 00:13:06,067
WE CALL THAT PERSON
THE "SMIZMARR,"
191
00:13:06,135 --> 00:13:08,769
AND MY SMIZMARR IS AMY.
192
00:13:08,838 --> 00:13:12,056
SO THE TOILET SEAT
IS LIKE THE UNCLE
OR SOMETHING?
193
00:13:14,110 --> 00:13:18,079
- SORRY I GOT YOUR BOYFRIEND
PREGNANT.
- THAT'S OKAY.
194
00:13:18,148 --> 00:13:21,049
AT LEAST KIF'S BABY SHOWER
SHOULD BE FUN. I BETTER
PUT IT ON MY CALENDAR.
195
00:13:21,117 --> 00:13:23,067
[ Beeps ]
196
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:26,571
THURSDAY,
BABY SHOWER-- ENTER.
197
00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:29,790
MIGHT AS WELL PLAN
FOR MY NEW LIFE
WHILE I'M AT IT.
198
00:13:29,859 --> 00:13:32,776
SET MOTHERHOOD MODE.
199
00:13:39,352 --> 00:13:41,602
TO MOTHERHOOD.
200
00:13:41,671 --> 00:13:43,804
[ Both Gulping ]
201
00:13:47,193 --> 00:13:50,778
[ Chattering ]
[ Bender ]
ZOIDBERG?
202
00:13:50,847 --> 00:13:54,164
[ Fry ]
REALIZE, YOU KNOW, MY FACE
WAS STUCK IN A PIZZA.
203
00:13:54,234 --> 00:13:57,335
MOM, DAD, I KNOW
THIS IS WEIRD, BUT--
204
00:13:57,403 --> 00:14:00,037
YEAH, YEAH.
WE DON'T CARE HOW
SQUISHY ALIEN GET PREGNANT.
205
00:14:00,106 --> 00:14:02,156
ALL WE CARE IS
WE HAVE GRANDCHILD NOW.
206
00:14:02,225 --> 00:14:04,325
YOU'RE VERY OPEN-MINDED,
MRS. WONG.
207
00:14:04,394 --> 00:14:08,546
HEY, YOU CALL HER "GRANDMA" NOW.
CALL ME GRANDMA LIKE CRAZY--
ALL THE TIME.
208
00:14:08,614 --> 00:14:10,748
[ Clinking ]
CHECK IT OUT, Y'ALL.
209
00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:13,550
- EVERYONE WE INVITED IS HERE.
- ALSO ZOIDBERG.
210
00:14:13,619 --> 00:14:17,471
- SO LET'S OPEN THE GIFTS.
- [ All Murmuring
In Agreement ]
211
00:14:17,540 --> 00:14:20,391
WAIT. WE'LL START
WITH THIS ONE FROM BENDER.
212
00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:29,450
- IT'S MY BOOTIES
FROM WHEN I WAS A KID.
- UH, THEY'RE ALREADY BRONZED.
213
00:14:29,519 --> 00:14:33,521
- THEY ARE BRONZE.
- AND THIS ONE'S FROM LEELA.
214
00:14:33,590 --> 00:14:36,957
OH, I JUST LOVE THE BOW.
I WONDER WHAT IT IS.
215
00:14:37,026 --> 00:14:40,611
YES, I WONDER
WHAT WE GOT YOU.
[ Grunts ]
216
00:14:40,679 --> 00:14:44,432
[ Gasps ]
IT'S A BASKET!
F-FOR PICNICS?
217
00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:49,520
IT MEANS A LOT TO ME.
IT'S THE BASKET MY PARENTS
LEFT ME IN AT THE ORPHANARIUM.
218
00:14:49,588 --> 00:14:53,374
- YOU COULD USE IT FOR PICNICS.
- HERE, AMY. WE GET THIS ONE
FOR YOU.
219
00:14:53,443 --> 00:14:56,844
OH! IS IT A NEW PARTY BOARD?
220
00:14:56,913 --> 00:15:00,631
IT'S A BOARD, ALL RIGHT--
AN IRONING BOARD.
221
00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:04,685
WE HAD YOUR OLD PARTY BOARD
CONVERTED NOW THAT YOU NOT
BE PARTYING ANYMORE.
222
00:15:04,754 --> 00:15:07,321
YOU-- YOU
TRASHED MY PARTY BOARD?
223
00:15:07,390 --> 00:15:10,424
DAMN RIGHT. NOW YOU A MOM,
THE ONLY SURFING YOU DO...
224
00:15:10,493 --> 00:15:12,993
IS UNDER A BIG WAVE
OF RESPONSIBILITY.
225
00:15:13,062 --> 00:15:16,864
OH, THIS IS THE HAPPIEST MOMENT
OF MY LIFE.
226
00:15:16,933 --> 00:15:20,768
YOU ALL
BROUGHT SUCH WONDERFUL GIFTS,
BUT THE GREATEST GIFT--
227
00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:25,189
- MINE!
- IS THE BOND I SHARE
WITH MY SMIZMARR, AMY.
228
00:15:25,257 --> 00:15:28,292
FOR SOON,
THE QUIVERING MASS OF LIFE
WITHIN ME...
229
00:15:28,361 --> 00:15:30,461
WILL DEPEND UPON US BOTH.
230
00:15:30,530 --> 00:15:34,032
EVEN NOW, I CAN SENSE IT
FEEDING, SQUIRMING,
231
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:40,004
SEARCHING, QUESTING,
AND SHORTLY, IT WILL
REND MY LOINS IN TWAIN,
232
00:15:40,072 --> 00:15:43,523
BURST FORTH,
AND PULL US DOWN, DOWN, DOWN...
233
00:15:43,592 --> 00:15:46,193
INTO THE DEEP,
DARK WATERS OF COMMITMENT.
234
00:15:46,262 --> 00:15:50,014
THAT'S SO BEAUTIFUL!
[ Sniffles ]
235
00:15:50,082 --> 00:15:53,283
YES. IT'S-- IT'S--
236
00:15:53,352 --> 00:15:57,271
[ Crying ]
NO! I CAN'T DO THIS!
237
00:15:57,340 --> 00:16:00,308
- [ Sobbing ]
- [ All Gasping ]
- [ Bender ] OH, MY GOD!
238
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:03,711
[ Infantile Crying ]
239
00:16:03,780 --> 00:16:06,663
[ Crying Continues ]
240
00:16:08,784 --> 00:16:13,003
- [ Neon Buzzing ]
- OH, HOW COULD AMY LEAVE ME?
241
00:16:13,072 --> 00:16:17,391
WHEN WILL WOMEN LEARN TO TAKE
RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE CHILDREN
THEY'VE HELPED CREATE?
242
00:16:17,459 --> 00:16:20,711
[ Stomach Gurgling ]
[ Gasps ]
THE QUICKENING!
243
00:16:20,780 --> 00:16:25,716
MY TIME IS NEAR. I MUST RETURN
TO MY HOME WORLD TO PERFORM
THE ANCIENT BIRTHING RITES.
244
00:16:25,784 --> 00:16:30,237
LET ME KNOW
HOW THAT TURNS OUT.
[ Chomps ]
245
00:16:48,908 --> 00:16:51,409
I MUST NOW EMBARK
ON A PERILOUS JOURNEY...
246
00:16:51,478 --> 00:16:54,845
TO GIVE BIRTH
IN PRECISELY THE SAME SWAMP
IN WHICH I WAS BORN.
247
00:16:54,914 --> 00:16:57,431
IF IT'S SO DANGEROUS,
I'D BETTER GO WITH YOU.
248
00:16:57,499 --> 00:17:00,434
A GAL HAS
TO PROTECT HER D.N.A.
NO, LEELA.
249
00:17:00,503 --> 00:17:04,071
TRADITION DEMANDS
THAT I MAKE THIS JOURNEY
WITH MY SMIZMARR,
250
00:17:04,139 --> 00:17:08,092
AND SINCE AMY ISN'T HERE,
I MUST GO IT ALONE.
251
00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:11,679
FAREWELL, FOR WE MAY
NEVER MEET AGAIN.
252
00:17:14,517 --> 00:17:16,517
[ Grunts ]
253
00:17:16,586 --> 00:17:19,786
MY SCRAPES
FEEL A LITTLE BETTER NOW.
254
00:17:19,855 --> 00:17:22,739
[ All Grunting ]
255
00:17:22,808 --> 00:17:25,576
HEY, WHAT'S THIS FAT,
UGLY THING?
256
00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:31,198
A FROG, A TOAD OR YO' MAMA?
[ Laughs ]
257
00:17:31,267 --> 00:17:34,835
- [ Bender Screams ]
- IT'S A POISONOUS FROAD!
258
00:17:34,904 --> 00:17:38,005
NO ONE MOVE.
[ Inhales Sharply ]
259
00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:44,929
- [ Froad Screeches ]
- I'M BACK, BABY.
260
00:17:44,997 --> 00:17:48,332
[ Frogs Croaking ]
261
00:17:53,439 --> 00:17:58,459
BEHOLD! THE SACRED,
ANCESTRAL BIRTHING GROUNDS
OF MY FAMILY.
262
00:17:58,528 --> 00:18:00,711
[ Sniffing ]
SMELLS LIKE A JOCKSTRAP.
263
00:18:05,902 --> 00:18:09,187
- I AM THE GRAND MIDWIFE!
- HI.
264
00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:13,357
I AM KIF
OF THE CLAN KROKER,
COME TO BEAR MY YOUNG.
265
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:16,994
THEN LET THE TEA
OF NEW LIFE BE BREWED,
266
00:18:17,063 --> 00:18:22,232
AS IT IS WRIT,
AND BOTH SHALL
LIFT THE JUG TOGETHER.
267
00:18:22,301 --> 00:18:25,169
- WHERE IS YOUR SMIZMARR?
- SHE IS NOT WITH ME.
268
00:18:25,238 --> 00:18:29,523
OH, THE SORROW!
OH, THE SHAME!
269
00:18:29,592 --> 00:18:32,059
I'M SORRY. I'M PROBABLY
JUST MAKING YOU FEEL WORSE.
270
00:18:32,128 --> 00:18:37,064
AS LONG AS AMY IS WITH ME
IN MY HEART, I WILL
HAVE THE STRENGTH OF TWO.
271
00:18:37,133 --> 00:18:39,333
[ Grunting ]
272
00:18:41,671 --> 00:18:45,672
APPARENTLY,
AMY HASN'T BEEN
WORKING OUT MUCH LATELY.
273
00:18:45,741 --> 00:18:48,292
[ Grunting ]
274
00:18:50,813 --> 00:18:54,348
AS THE TEA BOILS,
PLEASE JOIN HANDS...
275
00:18:54,417 --> 00:18:57,301
WITH YOUR BELOVED SMIZMARR.
276
00:18:57,370 --> 00:19:02,023
OH, RIGHT. SORRY, BUT I'VE
MEMORIZED THE CEREMONY BY ROTE,
AND IT MENTIONS HER A LOT.
277
00:19:02,091 --> 00:19:04,692
- I'LL TRY TO ENDURE.
- GOOD. 'CAUSE
I'M NOT CHANGING IT.
278
00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:06,977
NOW, TURN, YE TWO,
279
00:19:07,046 --> 00:19:11,165
AND GAZE DEEPLY
INTO EACH OTHER'S EYES.
280
00:19:11,234 --> 00:19:14,852
- WHAT ARE YOU LOOKIN' AT?
- MAY THE LOVE I SENSE
BETWEEN YOU...
281
00:19:14,921 --> 00:19:19,323
AT THIS MOMENT
REMAIN WITH YOU BOTH
THROUGH ALL YOUR DAYS.
282
00:19:19,392 --> 00:19:21,508
[ Whimpering ]
283
00:19:23,145 --> 00:19:25,112
THE TEA OF NEW LIFE IS READY.
284
00:19:25,181 --> 00:19:31,001
LET THOSE WHOSE LOVE
CREATED THIS LIFE SPEAK
EACH OTHER'S NAMES, THEN DRINK.
285
00:19:35,741 --> 00:19:37,925
[ Sighs ]
AMY.
286
00:19:37,994 --> 00:19:41,178
KIF!
287
00:19:41,247 --> 00:19:43,564
[ All Gasping ]
[ Bender ]
WHOA!
288
00:19:43,633 --> 00:19:46,583
AMY, IS IT YOU,
OR HAVE I GONE CRAZY
WITH LONELINESS?
289
00:19:46,652 --> 00:19:49,320
[ Bender ]
BOTH.
290
00:19:49,388 --> 00:19:51,322
WHOA!
291
00:19:51,390 --> 00:19:55,910
I STILL DON'T KNOW
IF I'M READY FOR THIS,
BUT I DO KNOW I LOVE YOU.
292
00:19:55,979 --> 00:19:59,680
- AND I WANNA BE HERE
BESIDE YOU.
- GREAT. NOW I LOST MY PLACE.
293
00:19:59,748 --> 00:20:01,732
- I'M STARTING OVER.
- [ Stomach Gurgling ]
294
00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:06,070
OH! NO TIME!
IT HAS BEGUN!
[ Both Slurping ]
295
00:20:06,139 --> 00:20:10,725
[ Yelping ]
OH, MY!
[ Gasps ]
296
00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:13,393
[ Stomach Gurgles ]
297
00:20:13,462 --> 00:20:16,129
[ Groaning ]
NEAT!
298
00:20:16,198 --> 00:20:19,733
YOU CAN DO IT, KIF!
[ Straining ]
299
00:20:19,801 --> 00:20:22,803
WHOA, NELLY!
[ Gulping ]
300
00:20:22,872 --> 00:20:25,956
[ Grunting, Yelping ]
301
00:20:27,459 --> 00:20:29,543
[ Agonized Yell ]
302
00:20:29,612 --> 00:20:32,896
- [ All Groaning ]
- [ Babies Squeaking ]
303
00:20:32,965 --> 00:20:35,549
AWW, MAN!
304
00:20:40,723 --> 00:20:44,241
AMY, MY LOVE, TELL ME.
ARE THEY MAKING IT
TO THE WATER?
305
00:20:45,411 --> 00:20:48,145
[ Insects Buzzing ]
306
00:20:49,915 --> 00:20:52,916
- AMY!
- SHOO!
307
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:58,171
STAY AWAY
FROM MY BABIES!
[ Grunts ]
308
00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,440
- [ Amy Grunts ]
- [ Insect Screeches ]
309
00:21:02,862 --> 00:21:05,229
[ Rattling ]
310
00:21:05,298 --> 00:21:09,283
- THE BIRTHING IS COMPLETE.
- [ All Cheering ]
- [ Bender ] ALL RIGHT!
311
00:21:09,351 --> 00:21:12,453
OH, THANK GOODNESS.
I WILL NOW
TAKE MY LEAVE.
312
00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:15,890
I LIVE HERE,
SO I WON'T ACTUALLY
BE GOING ANYWHERE,
313
00:21:15,958 --> 00:21:18,275
BUT YOU DON'T
HAVE TO TALK TO ME ANYMORE.
314
00:21:18,344 --> 00:21:20,311
CONGRATULATIONS.
NICE WORK.
315
00:21:20,379 --> 00:21:23,547
WAY TO GO, SQUISHY!
316
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:28,385
THERE GOES MY D.N.A.
WHAT A DISGUSTING
AND BEAUTIFUL PROCESS.
317
00:21:28,454 --> 00:21:32,906
- THAT'S BIRTH FOR YA.
- WELL, WE'VE GIVEN THEM
A GREAT START, AMY.
318
00:21:32,976 --> 00:21:38,179
AND IN 20 YEARS, THEY'LL
SPROUT LEGS AND CRAWL BACK
ONTO LAND AS CHILDREN.
319
00:21:38,247 --> 00:21:40,764
I'LL BE READY THEN.
319
00:21:41,305 --> 00:22:41,741
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