1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Finding unknown English words in this
movie? We got them at www.skeebdo.com

2
00:00:33,617 --> 00:00:35,278
Good news, everyone.

3
00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:38,361
Remember when you asked
to see my family tree?

4
00:00:38,455 --> 00:00:39,444
No.

5
00:00:39,540 --> 00:00:40,780
Ta-da!

6
00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:46,995
This is my ancestor, Philo
Farnsworth, inventor of television,

7
00:00:47,089 --> 00:00:50,547
and as a bonus,
childhood obesity.

8
00:00:50,634 --> 00:00:52,795
And here's Dean Farnsworth,

9
00:00:52,886 --> 00:00:56,504
developer of the Farnsworth
Test for Colorblindness.

10
00:00:56,598 --> 00:00:58,179
Where is he, blast it?

11
00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:01,933
And just recently, I learned
of a modern-day Farnsworth

12
00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:04,557
who invented
the Anti-Senility Truss.

13
00:01:04,648 --> 00:01:05,979
That's you, Professor.

14
00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:07,055
Wha...

15
00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:13,187
Ah, yes, the Farnsworths boast a
proud and distinguished lineage.

16
00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:15,405
No wormy fruit
on thls tree.

17
00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:16,527
What about Fry?

18
00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:18,199
Isn't he your distant uncle?

19
00:01:18,287 --> 00:01:21,154
Very distant. Not a true
Farnsworth, mind you.

20
00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:24,202
He's way over here
on this filthy branch

21
00:01:24,334 --> 00:01:27,167
riddled with fungus
and dung beetles.

22
00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:31,125
What's with
the 17 dung beetles?

23
00:01:31,216 --> 00:01:32,251
Ugh!

24
00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:35,960
Well, it's 6:00. I guess we'll have
to deliver that human heart tomorrow.

25
00:01:36,054 --> 00:01:37,919
Good work, people.
Woo-hoo!

26
00:01:38,181 --> 00:01:41,890
Time to go clubbing!
Baby seals, here I come.

27
00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:45,056
Guess I better head over
to my night job.

28
00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:46,894
You have a night job?
Yup.

29
00:01:46,982 --> 00:01:49,394
It's exhausting, but I need
the extra money to buy coffee

30
00:01:49,484 --> 00:01:51,349
so I can stay awake
for my night job.

31
00:01:51,570 --> 00:01:53,185
But...
Got to go!

32
00:01:56,867 --> 00:01:57,902
Ah!

33
00:01:57,993 --> 00:02:01,360
You've got a surprising amount of
algae in your beard, Mr. President.

34
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:03,946
Just sit still and let the
algae-eater do its work.

35
00:02:05,792 --> 00:02:07,498
Lay off my trademark mole!

36
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,122
Hi, Lars.
Fry.

37
00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:12,374
Whatever. I'm heading
out to my night job.

38
00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:16,630
Remember, no loud noise, no
head bowling, and no parties,

39
00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,381
or it'll be your ass in a jar.

40
00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:19,920
I want to go to that museum!

41
00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:28,019
Man, this place is a snooze.

42
00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:32,475
Hey, Fry, I challenge President
Taft here to a pie-eating contest.

43
00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:33,809
You're on, skinny.

44
00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:36,774
Sorry, guys. You know
the rules. No fun allowed.

45
00:02:36,907 --> 00:02:38,772
Come on, you pansy!
I'm thirsty!

46
00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:40,857
I want me some
Tennessee loopy juice!

47
00:02:40,952 --> 00:02:42,158
And I want loose women!

48
00:02:42,245 --> 00:02:44,076
The kind that aren't afraid
to show a little ankle.

49
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:46,450
Or elbow.

50
00:02:46,750 --> 00:02:48,866
No visitors. I'll lose my job.

51
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:52,870
Oh, boohoo. "I'll lose
my minimum wage job."

52
00:02:55,467 --> 00:02:57,674
You're mean,
Rutherford B. Hayes!

53
00:02:57,761 --> 00:02:59,171
Listen here, young man.

54
00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:02,550
We have nothing to fear
but running out of beer.

55
00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:06,183
All right,
one small get-together,

56
00:03:06,269 --> 00:03:08,385
but let's keep it
quiet and dignified.

57
00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:10,095
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah!

58
00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:14,228
All right!

59
00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:20,280
Four more beers!
Four more beers!

60
00:03:23,245 --> 00:03:24,781
Yes! Right in the lke!

61
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:27,487
Nice elbow action.

62
00:03:28,125 --> 00:03:30,081
So, you grow hemp.

63
00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:31,203
Yes.

64
00:03:31,294 --> 00:03:33,034
And you do what with it?

65
00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:34,711
All manner of things.

66
00:03:34,798 --> 00:03:37,665
Manufacture paper,
fabric, rope...

67
00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:40,216
Oh. Well,
nice talking to you.

68
00:03:40,303 --> 00:03:43,545
Why, I used to smoke about
four feet of rope a day.

69
00:03:43,682 --> 00:03:45,172
Let me give you
my pager number.

70
00:03:45,434 --> 00:03:49,347
Hey, Reagan, remember when you
asked to see my family tree?

71
00:03:49,438 --> 00:03:51,645
I asked you
to leave me alone.

72
00:03:52,441 --> 00:03:54,727
The Farnsworths
are a remarkable...

73
00:03:54,818 --> 00:03:56,433
Farnsworth?

74
00:03:56,820 --> 00:03:58,936
That name is a stain
on American history.

75
00:03:59,030 --> 00:04:02,443
One of the worst traitors of
the Revolution was a Farnsworth.

76
00:04:02,534 --> 00:04:03,569
You're lying!

77
00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:04,820
He's George Washington.

78
00:04:04,911 --> 00:04:06,196
He tends not to do that.

79
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:10,865
David Farnsworth was a notorious
British agent and counterfeiter.

80
00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:14,668
He conspired to bring down our
nation with his fraudulent currency!

81
00:04:15,338 --> 00:04:18,330
A Farnsworth did this?
Oh, dear!

82
00:04:18,425 --> 00:04:20,632
My good name is ruined!

83
00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:23,381
Hi. I'm Jerry.
I like movies.

84
00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:32,060
Anyone seen Ulysses Grant?
He owes me a cheroot.

85
00:04:32,189 --> 00:04:34,100
He's over there,
puking in the bushes.

86
00:04:35,150 --> 00:04:37,687
No!

87
00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:44,447
Oh, boy.
Mr. Fry!

88
00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:46,900
Why are all these
people standing around

89
00:04:46,995 --> 00:04:49,111
when they should be partying?

90
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:50,404
All right!

91
00:04:52,584 --> 00:04:55,542
Hey, hey, LB J,
you want to get drunk?

92
00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:57,244
Hell, yeah.

93
00:04:58,215 --> 00:05:02,208
Zoidberg, no! The effects of jar
juice aren't fully understood.

94
00:05:02,511 --> 00:05:06,971
Uh... Not bad. A hint
of Vitalis and... Whoa!

95
00:05:10,185 --> 00:05:13,393
I recognize this.
It's the 1960s!

96
00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:16,222
I did a report on it
for my drug-taking class.

97
00:05:16,358 --> 00:05:17,973
Hi, I'm Andy Warhol,

98
00:05:18,068 --> 00:05:21,856
and you're some kind of
marvelous lobster-man.

99
00:05:21,947 --> 00:05:25,906
Right on. Say, you got any
real soup, or just this schlock?

100
00:05:27,577 --> 00:05:28,987
What a horrid bore.

101
00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:31,152
Ooh.
Huh?

102
00:05:31,289 --> 00:05:34,747
Far out. That head gave
me a total head trip!

103
00:05:34,918 --> 00:05:37,330
Really? I'm gonna lick
Herbert Hoover's head.

104
00:05:37,420 --> 00:05:40,628
Lick the head! Lick the head!

105
00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:50,673
Whoa! A speakeasy! One
prohibited beverage, please.

106
00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:52,302
Hey, Dutch,
the new still is here!

107
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:55,098
I'm not a still.
I just smell like one.

108
00:05:56,731 --> 00:05:59,268
Dutch Schultz, come out
with your bootleg whiskey.

109
00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:00,394
We're thirsty!

110
00:06:06,950 --> 00:06:08,486
What the heck
is going on?

111
00:06:08,618 --> 00:06:10,859
Jefferson, did you
sell me some bad rope?

112
00:06:11,079 --> 00:06:14,788
Lt must have something to do
with the jar fluid.

113
00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,494
A- ha!

114
00:06:16,626 --> 00:06:20,369
Dr. Cahill, do I detect
a trace of opalescence?

115
00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:21,919
Very observant, Professor.

116
00:06:22,007 --> 00:06:25,795
To preserve the heads, we use a rare
form of powdered crystalline opal.

117
00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:29,461
This is
the world's entire supply.

118
00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:32,972
Yet it's so powerful, it
should last a thousand years.

119
00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:35,596
It keeps the heads alive,
but we don't know how.

120
00:06:35,812 --> 00:06:37,894
Why did it give us
those hallucinations?

121
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:39,892
Because it didn't!

122
00:06:40,317 --> 00:06:41,352
Yeah-uh.

123
00:06:41,443 --> 00:06:44,185
Opal has unusual
temporal properties.

124
00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:47,362
It preserves each head
in a time stasis bubble.

125
00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:53,695
Ergo, licking those heads actually sent us
back in time to their original eras. Look!

126
00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:56,951
Schlock and more schlock.

127
00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:59,373
Psst. Is the coast clear?

128
00:06:59,461 --> 00:07:01,497
Button your yap, you mug.

129
00:07:01,796 --> 00:07:04,913
I've discovered a new
means of time travel.

130
00:07:05,008 --> 00:07:07,670
I'll call it
the Farnsworth Effect!

131
00:07:08,345 --> 00:07:12,088
Nice try, but even this
discovery won't undo the treachery

132
00:07:12,182 --> 00:07:15,674
wrought by your nefarious
ancestor, David Farnsworth.

133
00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:19,219
It will if we go back
in time and stop him!

134
00:07:25,487 --> 00:07:26,567
Professor, no!

135
00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:28,941
You can't tongue
the father of our country!

136
00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:35,610
Where are we?
Also, when are we?

137
00:07:35,747 --> 00:07:38,739
68th and Broadway,
Colonial era.

138
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:42,875
Rush hour.

139
00:07:47,509 --> 00:07:51,969
By my calculations, this head
trip will last at most 24 hours.

140
00:07:52,055 --> 00:07:55,297
We need to stop that monster,
David Farnsworth!

141
00:07:55,517 --> 00:08:00,432
Look at the date on this
newspaper. April 17th, 1775.

142
00:08:00,522 --> 00:08:02,979
Say, on this exact date,

143
00:08:03,066 --> 00:08:06,433
the Continental Congress was
meeting secretly in New York.

144
00:08:06,569 --> 00:08:07,979
Maybe they can help us.

145
00:08:08,071 --> 00:08:09,561
But they could be
meeting anywhere.

146
00:08:09,864 --> 00:08:12,276
What are we going to do,
search building to building?

147
00:08:13,451 --> 00:08:15,487
We'll start with that one.

148
00:08:16,079 --> 00:08:18,035
Alexander Hamilton
of New York,

149
00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:20,079
how say you?
Nay.

150
00:08:20,250 --> 00:08:22,992
John Hancock and John Adams
of Massachusetts?

151
00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:24,325
Yea!
Yea!

152
00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:25,831
The yeas have it.

153
00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:29,710
Our nation's official joke
state shall be New Jersey.

154
00:08:29,801 --> 00:08:31,211
Uh-oh!

155
00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:38,966
Ah, it is just
our new Crock-Pot.

156
00:08:39,102 --> 00:08:41,764
Watch it, wiggy.
I ain't no stinking crock.

157
00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:43,846
We'll see about that
in five hours.

158
00:08:45,108 --> 00:08:48,441
Halt! From whence comest
thou, one-eyed maiden?

159
00:08:48,820 --> 00:08:50,856
Uh... Ever been to Peru?

160
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:52,194
Certainly not.

161
00:08:52,282 --> 00:08:53,271
I'm from Peru.

162
00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:55,527
Clam up,
Founding Fathers.

163
00:08:55,618 --> 00:08:59,702
We need help locating the treacherous
forger who forged this forgery.

164
00:09:01,458 --> 00:09:03,824
My word.
If these enter circulation,

165
00:09:03,918 --> 00:09:08,412
our economy will be destroyed, and
with it, our chance at independence.

166
00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:12,374
Only one man in the colonies has a
printing press fine enough to make these.

167
00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:14,460
Our good friend,
Ben Franklin!

168
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:16,969
Uh-oh. Isn't Franklin
in Philadelphia?

169
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:20,641
When he's not in Charlotte
or Marybelle or Louisa.

170
00:09:24,606 --> 00:09:25,686
I don't get it.

171
00:09:25,774 --> 00:09:27,810
I'm sure no one's
ever said this before,

172
00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:31,519
but I must get to Philadelphia
as quickly as possible!

173
00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:41,036
Oh. Why couldn't my disgraced
ancestor have lived in the NASCAR era?

174
00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:50,544
Dr. Franklin, your new
steam engine is here.

175
00:09:50,673 --> 00:09:52,664
I ain't no
stinking steam engine!

176
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,499
Chicken's ready.

177
00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,292
You may go, Louisa.

178
00:09:56,387 --> 00:09:57,593
Now I get it.

179
00:10:03,186 --> 00:10:05,347
Fascinating.
Be you man or machine?

180
00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:08,555
Mostly machine. Might be a
couple of dead cats in there.

181
00:10:08,817 --> 00:10:11,274
Dr. Franklin,
with all due respect

182
00:10:11,361 --> 00:10:14,569
to the brilliant
inventor of the stove,

183
00:10:14,656 --> 00:10:15,645
I must speak with you.

184
00:10:16,825 --> 00:10:19,692
I'm looking for the scoundrel
who made this.

185
00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:24,701
Intricate filigree, satanic
symbols. Looks like one of mine.

186
00:10:25,250 --> 00:10:28,367
But no,
this is a fake!

187
00:10:28,586 --> 00:10:31,874
Duh. It says,
"Colony of Maffachufetts."

188
00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:34,460
More like Taxachufetts.

189
00:10:34,676 --> 00:10:39,716
That's just how we print
"S"s, you ftupid fhitheads.

190
00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:41,258
Someone must
have used my press

191
00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:43,214
while I was poking around
in Charlotte.

192
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:45,550
Let's ask my apprentice,
David Farnsworth.

193
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:48,261
Farnsworth?
That's him!

194
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:49,558
Arm yourselves!

195
00:10:51,067 --> 00:10:53,433
I call it the Franklinator.

196
00:10:57,615 --> 00:11:00,197
The apprentice's suite
is empty! He's gone!

197
00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:03,117
Wait. What's that glistening
in the chamber pot?

198
00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:04,235
Let's find out!

199
00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:08,326
Bender, do you know
what a chamber pot is?

200
00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:10,416
I don't know,
and I don't care.

201
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:14,879
A Massachusetts
ha'penny?

202
00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:18,299
Probably fake, too.
There's one way to find out.

203
00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:20,426
Ew.

204
00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:22,795
What?
Bender bit a poo penny.

205
00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:24,222
Bender bit a poo penny.

206
00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:26,678
Look, 'tis but worthless tin.

207
00:11:26,978 --> 00:11:30,766
Where could Farnsworth have
minted such a high quality fake?

208
00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:31,846
Not here.

209
00:11:31,941 --> 00:11:35,604
But you know, I have a friend in
Boston who's an expert silversmith.

210
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:36,935
They could be connected.

211
00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:39,987
There's only, like, 40 people
who do anything around here.

212
00:11:40,074 --> 00:11:45,034
But Boston's 300 miles away, and
Bender kicked our horse to death.

213
00:11:45,121 --> 00:11:46,986
We'll never get there
in time.

214
00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:50,748
Unless you have another
invention up your sleeve.

215
00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:52,950
Hmm...

216
00:11:57,508 --> 00:11:59,419
How is this going
to get us to Boston?

217
00:12:02,347 --> 00:12:04,087
Stupid Franklin.

218
00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:06,965
I will get you!

219
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:20,194
Ah. That scrap metal
I ordered is here.

220
00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:22,237
I'm 40% scrap metal.

221
00:12:23,785 --> 00:12:28,245
Well, Ben Franklin, my fellow
son of liber-tea kettles.

222
00:12:28,998 --> 00:12:30,863
Yes, I've made
some new teakettles.

223
00:12:30,959 --> 00:12:32,620
Perfect for
special occasions.

224
00:12:32,835 --> 00:12:35,076
Like hanging King George in effigy...

225
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:39,756
And "H" and "l" are monograms
you can put on those kettles.

226
00:12:40,969 --> 00:12:43,085
What are you looking at,
you British bastards?

227
00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:45,261
Paul, we talked about this.

228
00:12:47,684 --> 00:12:50,767
Mr. Revere, we're looking
for a counterfeiter

229
00:12:50,853 --> 00:12:53,469
who minted these
smelly ha'pennies.

230
00:12:53,564 --> 00:12:56,180
His name is
David Farnsworth.

231
00:12:56,526 --> 00:12:59,438
Farnsworth? I just hired him
for the fall candlestick rush.

232
00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:01,106
He's in the foundry
this very moment.

233
00:13:03,366 --> 00:13:05,903
Everybody,
take a Franklinator.

234
00:13:08,371 --> 00:13:10,236
Aw, I got a chipmunk.

235
00:13:18,881 --> 00:13:19,870
Hee-ya!

236
00:13:20,091 --> 00:13:21,297
Uh, wha?

237
00:13:21,384 --> 00:13:23,340
David Farnsworth,
I presume?

238
00:13:23,428 --> 00:13:25,214
I is Davy Farnsworth.

239
00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:29,510
Foof. You're a disgrace
to the very name, Farnsworth.

240
00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:31,966
Look out! He's got
a bezelling planisher.

241
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:33,134
That's right.

242
00:13:33,354 --> 00:13:34,810
Who wants to be
bevelled?

243
00:13:45,575 --> 00:13:47,691
You idiot.
I'm not a cannon.

244
00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:54,781
Huh. I guess I am a cannon.

245
00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:57,950
Time to prune
the family tree.

246
00:13:58,254 --> 00:13:59,869
Wha!

247
00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:06,426
Huzzah! I've saved
the Farnsworth name.

248
00:14:07,388 --> 00:14:09,674
Urgent message
for Mr. Revere.

249
00:14:10,767 --> 00:14:13,509
"Mr. Revere, pray do
not fhit your pants.

250
00:14:13,603 --> 00:14:15,389
"The British attack
has begun.

251
00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:18,688
"Cross the river and watch
for my signal." I must ride.

252
00:14:22,445 --> 00:14:25,357
He has so much stuff.
He won't miss this.

253
00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:32,323
Let's burn these counterfeits and paddle
the next swan boat the hell out of Boston.

254
00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:33,535
Here you go.

255
00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:34,658
Thanks.

256
00:14:36,918 --> 00:14:39,955
Say, where did you
get that lantern?

257
00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:41,627
From that old church
to the north.

258
00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:45,999
They had two burning, so I
figured they wouldn't miss one.

259
00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:49,381
"One if by land,
two if by sea."

260
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,848
The British are coming!
The British are coming!

261
00:14:54,977 --> 00:14:56,558
By land. By land.

262
00:14:56,646 --> 00:14:59,558
Gotta treat this OCD.
Gotta treat this OCD.

263
00:15:07,115 --> 00:15:08,275
Fry, you dope.

264
00:15:08,366 --> 00:15:10,732
You've really screwed
the granny this time.

265
00:15:10,827 --> 00:15:12,863
History needed
that second lantern.

266
00:15:12,954 --> 00:15:14,990
We'd better stop
Paul Revere before...

267
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:20,787
I guess everything worked out
jolly all right, eh, guvnor?

268
00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:24,746
What's with
the fruity accent, ducky?

269
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:26,672
Bollocks,
I got it, too.

270
00:15:26,843 --> 00:15:28,674
Where's all
the Presidents heads, then?

271
00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:33,847
I say. Appears we've
changed history too much.

272
00:15:34,016 --> 00:15:37,508
Disaster of nightmarish
proportions and what not.

273
00:15:40,815 --> 00:15:41,850
Quite.

274
00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:00,323
Where have you
blokes been?

275
00:16:00,543 --> 00:16:02,534
You nearly missed elevenses.

276
00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:04,577
Who's for tea
and shmavouries?

277
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:07,539
What in bloody hell's going
on around here, I says.

278
00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:11,634
Indeed. What's become
of the dear old USA?

279
00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:12,801
Beg pardon?

280
00:16:12,889 --> 00:16:14,425
The Revolution?

281
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:17,052
1776 and what all?

282
00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:21,640
Oh! The Colonial dustup. Well,
there's nothing we Brits enjoy more

283
00:16:21,731 --> 00:16:26,020
than a good documentary. Turn on
the tellyvisor, Dr. Zoidsmythe.

284
00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:27,816
I'll dial up the Beeb.

285
00:16:27,904 --> 00:16:30,611
They've always got
a nlce docky-wocky on.

286
00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:34,736
The Vanquished Pride
of the Yankees,

287
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:37,660
or, America the Dutiful.

288
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:42,082
North America, or West
Britannia as we now call it,

289
00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:45,626
has been under British rule
for 1,400 years,

290
00:16:45,713 --> 00:16:49,831
all thanks to a nutter
known as Wrong-Way Revere.

291
00:16:49,926 --> 00:16:53,134
The British are
coming by land, by land.

292
00:16:54,972 --> 00:16:57,088
But we came by sea, we did.

293
00:16:57,350 --> 00:16:59,511
Surprised the Yanks
at Lexington,

294
00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:03,015
ending the rebellion
with nary a kipper scuffed.

295
00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:04,887
Scuffed kippers, anyone?

296
00:17:04,982 --> 00:17:06,938
Right kind of you, mum.

297
00:17:08,611 --> 00:17:10,397
The humiliated conspirators

298
00:17:10,488 --> 00:17:13,355
were forced to sign
the Declaration of Dependence,

299
00:17:13,783 --> 00:17:16,741
proclaiming
British rule forever.

300
00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:21,196
Meanwhile, a loyal Brit by
the name of David Farnsworth,

301
00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,906
tracked down the traitor,
George Washington,

302
00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:26,788
and bravely smothered him
with his wig.

303
00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:30,458
Oh, criminy.

304
00:17:30,841 --> 00:17:34,834
In gratitude, King George
named Farnsworth a duke

305
00:17:34,929 --> 00:17:39,218
and granted his family massive
landholdings in the colonies.

306
00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:44,094
Blimey. I've never felt so
ashamed to be a Farnsworth.

307
00:17:44,188 --> 00:17:47,521
Will my lord be returning to his
massive landholdings for luncheon?

308
00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:48,768
Huh, wha?

309
00:17:57,618 --> 00:18:00,985
I know we're ladies in waiting,
but what are we waiting for?

310
00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:04,163
How should I know?
Just shut up and wait.

311
00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:07,916
Say, how is it that
we've got socialized medicine,

312
00:18:08,004 --> 00:18:10,120
but me teeth
still look like this?

313
00:18:10,298 --> 00:18:13,085
Can't we just go back in time,
and set things right again?

314
00:18:13,175 --> 00:18:17,714
Don't want to. Rather nice, living
under the Crown and so forth.

315
00:18:17,805 --> 00:18:19,215
Rather.

316
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:23,015
What's more, couldn't go back
even if we wanted to.

317
00:18:23,144 --> 00:18:27,353
No more crystalline opal left
in all the world, don't you know?

318
00:18:28,691 --> 00:18:32,559
My lord, the Queen is here
for her weekly visit.

319
00:18:32,820 --> 00:18:36,404
The Queen?
Sounds most satisfactory.

320
00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:38,106
All of you, out!

321
00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:42,694
Right then. Let's go play
some quoits, whatever that is.

322
00:18:44,707 --> 00:18:47,119
Presenting
the Queen of England,

323
00:18:47,209 --> 00:18:50,918
America, and two
parking spaces in Tokyo.

324
00:18:51,422 --> 00:18:53,834
Where's me consort at?

325
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,964
Consort?

326
00:18:57,136 --> 00:18:58,922
That's right, love.
For centuries,

327
00:18:59,013 --> 00:19:02,176
the Farnsworth gentlemen has
provided service to the Queen.

328
00:19:02,516 --> 00:19:05,349
Now, close your eyes
and think of England.

329
00:19:06,937 --> 00:19:09,644
I say.
What's that in your crown?

330
00:19:09,899 --> 00:19:13,938
You mean the Andamooka Opal? That's
the most precious gem in all the...

331
00:19:14,737 --> 00:19:17,194
Yes. Three rubbers on the hobb.

332
00:19:19,075 --> 00:19:22,988
Stop him! He crowned me in the
knickers and nicked me crown.

333
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:29,244
Freeze. Or we'll be forced
to continue chasing you,

334
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:31,075
since we don't carry guns.

335
00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:32,785
Indubitably.

336
00:19:34,924 --> 00:19:37,666
We've got to go back in time
and set things straight!

337
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:39,842
Hurry up and lick
Washington's head again!

338
00:19:39,929 --> 00:19:43,922
We can't. There's no George
Washington nor any other presidents.

339
00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:47,554
What about this bloke?
He's from Revolutionary times.

340
00:19:49,438 --> 00:19:50,678
Farnsworth.

341
00:19:51,065 --> 00:19:53,772
Hey, you're the plonkers
what candlesticked me.

342
00:19:53,901 --> 00:19:55,141
Well, I showed you.

343
00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:56,775
I killed George Washington,

344
00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:59,524
and now I'm married
to one of the Spice Girls.

345
00:19:59,615 --> 00:20:00,900
Don't rightly know which one.

346
00:20:01,409 --> 00:20:04,446
Bender, fetch me
that powdered opal.

347
00:20:11,293 --> 00:20:15,707
It's time to restore dignity
to the Farnsworth name.

348
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:17,705
Ew!

349
00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:25,880
There. That time I left
both lanterns in place.

350
00:20:25,975 --> 00:20:29,308
And I hit Farnsworth
much, much harder.

351
00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:30,976
Perhaps too hard.

352
00:20:31,188 --> 00:20:34,726
Look, all the presidents
are back. Even John Tyler.

353
00:20:35,025 --> 00:20:40,520
That's the first time anyone's
spoken to me in 1,200 years.

354
00:20:40,656 --> 00:20:46,117
Yes, from Chester A. Arthur to
Chester Z. Arthur, they're all here.

355
00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:51,330
Our republic and the Farnsworth
family name are saved.

356
00:20:51,834 --> 00:20:54,041
And no one
will ever know.

357
00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:02,916
Yeah.

358
00:21:37,046 --> 00:21:38,035
English - US - PSDH

358
00:21:39,305 --> 00:21:45,303
Learn the unknown English words
of this movie at www.skeebdo.com