1
00:00:01,402 --> 00:00:03,427
Here's what happened last week.
2
00:00:03,504 --> 00:00:05,267
Rachel and the Glee Club
know that Quinn's pregnant...
3
00:00:05,339 --> 00:00:07,933
but they all think Finn's the father,
when really, it's Puck. Yikes.
4
00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:12,741
And Terri's only fake pregnant and wants
Quinn to give her her baby so Will won't find out.
5
00:00:12,813 --> 00:00:14,440
How come you haven't had
any morning sickness?
6
00:00:14,515 --> 00:00:16,676
Also, Ken is dating Emma,
but she's really got eyes for Mr. Schue.
7
00:00:16,750 --> 00:00:18,911
- And that's what you missed on...
- # Glee #
8
00:00:18,986 --> 00:00:21,216
[Will]
A- five, six, seven, eight.
9
00:00:21,288 --> 00:00:24,780
Step, turn, out.
And it's ball-change. Step-ball-change.
10
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:28,851
Step, you, you, you, you.
Ba, ba, ba. Turn...
11
00:00:28,929 --> 00:00:31,261
Come on, guys.
You're sleep-walking on me here.
12
00:00:31,332 --> 00:00:33,266
Gimme some energy.
13
00:00:33,334 --> 00:00:35,632
- We've got sectionals in two...
- Please. Sectionals is gonna be a breeze.
14
00:00:35,703 --> 00:00:38,570
- [Sighs] Maybe so...
- [Yawns]
15
00:00:38,639 --> 00:00:42,405
but if we coast through sectionals,
we're gonna get killed at regionals.
16
00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:44,569
We have got to be on our game.
17
00:00:44,645 --> 00:00:46,579
[Laughing]
18
00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:50,716
Sorry. Funny YouTube.
It's a grape-stomping one.
19
00:00:50,784 --> 00:00:53,617
[School Bell Rings]
20
00:00:53,687 --> 00:00:55,655
The kids have gotten really complacent.
21
00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:57,714
It's like the fire has totally gone out.
22
00:00:57,791 --> 00:01:00,760
Um... [Chuckles]
Um, I'm sorry. You've just...
23
00:01:00,828 --> 00:01:06,095
You've got a little mustard
in your cute, Kirk Douglas chin dimple.
24
00:01:06,166 --> 00:01:08,566
[Laughs]
Uh... Ah?
25
00:01:10,637 --> 00:01:12,571
- Um...
- Did I get it?
26
00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:15,733
- [Laughing] Here. Let me... Hold on.
- [Laughs]
27
00:01:17,378 --> 00:01:19,403
There.
28
00:01:20,681 --> 00:01:22,740
Thanks.
29
00:01:22,816 --> 00:01:24,943
Um, so.
30
00:01:25,018 --> 00:01:27,248
Uh, when did...
When did this start to happen?
31
00:01:27,321 --> 00:01:29,585
[Groans]
A week ago.
32
00:01:29,656 --> 00:01:33,251
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven...
33
00:01:33,327 --> 00:01:35,022
- No, no, no, no.
- Great news, guys.
34
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:38,963
Just got the competition bracket for
sectionals, and we are in really good shape.
35
00:01:39,032 --> 00:01:42,024
There's only two other teams.
If we beat them, we make it to regionals.
36
00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:45,162
- Yeah.
- Who are the other teams?
37
00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:47,298
Drumroll, please, Finn.
38
00:01:49,676 --> 00:01:53,442
School for the Deaf in Dayton,
and some place called Jane Adams Academy.
39
00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,539
Jane Adams? That's a halfway house...
40
00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:58,608
- for girls just getting out of juvie.
- Th-Th-This is great.
41
00:01:58,685 --> 00:02:01,677
People who can't hear what they're
singing, and criminals who don't care.
42
00:02:01,755 --> 00:02:04,451
It's gonna be a cakewalk. High five.
43
00:02:04,525 --> 00:02:06,959
[Will] I don't know. They think
they've got it in the bag...
44
00:02:07,027 --> 00:02:08,961
so they've simply stopped trying.
45
00:02:09,029 --> 00:02:11,896
I've got to figure out
some way to motivate them.
46
00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:13,990
Okay, well, you, um...
47
00:02:14,067 --> 00:02:16,001
You could... Well, what about a sticker board?
48
00:02:16,069 --> 00:02:18,902
That's how my parents
got me to do chores when I was a kid.
49
00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:22,169
All right, so I do a chore,
and then I get a star, and then...
50
00:02:22,242 --> 00:02:25,507
Oh, dear God. Please... Please stop talking.
51
00:02:25,579 --> 00:02:27,843
[Chuckles]
I'm trying desperately...
52
00:02:27,915 --> 00:02:32,875
to ignore the treacly sweet
inanity of your asinine conversation...
53
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:34,887
but now I've got bile in my mouth.
54
00:02:34,955 --> 00:02:37,355
I will hold my tongue no further.
55
00:02:37,424 --> 00:02:40,518
You know what this is?
This is a list of my Cheerios.
56
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:43,688
Every week I pick someone at random,
and I kick 'em out.
57
00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,994
Yeah, well, in Glee Club
we do things a little bit differently.
58
00:02:46,066 --> 00:02:48,864
Oh, yeah, Will?
How's that workin' out for you?
59
00:02:48,936 --> 00:02:51,063
You have to remember something.
60
00:02:51,138 --> 00:02:53,129
We're dealing with children.
61
00:02:53,207 --> 00:02:55,437
They need to be terrified.
62
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:57,443
It's like mother's milk to them.
63
00:02:57,511 --> 00:03:01,504
Without it, their bones
won't grow properly.
64
00:03:01,582 --> 00:03:03,516
So if you want results with a kid...
65
00:03:03,584 --> 00:03:07,850
you find that competitive animal
within, and unleash it.
66
00:03:07,921 --> 00:03:11,186
Okay. Ellen, that blouse is just insane.
67
00:03:16,630 --> 00:03:18,894
Can't believe she's allowed
to teach at this school.
68
00:03:18,966 --> 00:03:21,434
You know...
69
00:03:21,502 --> 00:03:23,436
she may have a point.
70
00:03:29,610 --> 00:03:31,669
Competition.
71
00:03:31,745 --> 00:03:35,044
Every one of these people or elements was
a champion in their own right...
72
00:03:35,115 --> 00:03:38,881
but they used competing with each other
to make themselves even better.
73
00:03:38,952 --> 00:03:41,045
I don't understand how lightning...
74
00:03:41,121 --> 00:03:43,214
is in competition with
an above-ground swimming pool.
75
00:03:44,458 --> 00:03:46,449
Just go with it. You guys
have become complacent.
76
00:03:46,527 --> 00:03:48,757
You were great at the invitational...
77
00:03:48,829 --> 00:03:50,797
but you gotta up your game
if you wanna get through sectionals.
78
00:03:50,864 --> 00:03:53,628
- [Yawning]
- Okay, split up.
79
00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,895
Guys on the left side,
girls on the right side.
80
00:03:57,337 --> 00:03:59,931
Let's go. Come on.
81
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:02,936
[Chuckles]
82
00:04:03,010 --> 00:04:05,240
[Clears Throat]
All right.
83
00:04:05,312 --> 00:04:07,337
Kurt?
84
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:16,917
Here's the deal. Two teams...
Boys versus girls.
85
00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:19,424
One week from today...
86
00:04:19,493 --> 00:04:21,927
you will each perform
a mash-up of your choice.
87
00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:25,658
- What's a mash-up?
- A mash-up is when you take two songs...
88
00:04:25,732 --> 00:04:30,032
and mash 'em together to make an even
richer explosion of musical expression.
89
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:32,196
Boys will perform on Tuesday.
Girls the next day.
90
00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:35,503
I want you guys to go all out, okay?
Costumes, choreography.
91
00:04:35,576 --> 00:04:37,874
Whoever wins the competition...
92
00:04:37,945 --> 00:04:41,210
- gets to choose the number
that we do for sectionals.
- Wait.
93
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,806
Who's gonna be the judge?
94
00:04:43,884 --> 00:04:46,512
- Your gender makes you biased.
- Ahh.
95
00:04:46,587 --> 00:04:49,988
There is going to be a celebrity judge.
96
00:04:50,057 --> 00:04:53,686
- Who?
- You're gonna have to show up to find out.
97
00:04:54,761 --> 00:04:56,695
- We got this in the bag.
- Totally.
98
00:04:56,763 --> 00:04:59,163
I'm gonna start story-boarding
our choreography tonight.
99
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:01,166
Hey. Hope you guys are up
for this competition.
100
00:05:01,234 --> 00:05:03,168
The girls look pretty pumped.
101
00:05:03,236 --> 00:05:05,727
We're planning on smacking 'em down
like the hand of God.
102
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:08,297
[Chuckles]
103
00:05:08,375 --> 00:05:12,141
Hey, Finn, you all right?
You seem a little out of it.
104
00:05:12,212 --> 00:05:14,476
Yeah, I'm just a little worn out.
105
00:05:14,548 --> 00:05:18,211
Come on, dude.
We're late for football practice.
106
00:05:24,491 --> 00:05:28,723
[Thinking]
Dear Journal. Feeling listless again today.
107
00:05:28,795 --> 00:05:30,922
It began at dawn, when I tried...
108
00:05:30,998 --> 00:05:34,900
to make a smoothie out of beef bones,
breaking my juicer.
109
00:05:34,968 --> 00:05:38,563
And then at Cheerios practice, disaster.
110
00:05:38,639 --> 00:05:41,073
[Sighs]
111
00:05:41,141 --> 00:05:43,132
It was unmistakable.
112
00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:46,543
It was like spotting the first
spark on the Hindenburg.
113
00:05:46,613 --> 00:05:50,413
A quiver. That quiver
will lose us nationals...
114
00:05:50,484 --> 00:05:53,544
and without a championship,
I'll lose my endorsements...
115
00:05:53,620 --> 00:05:57,249
and without those endorsements,
I won't be able to buy my hovercraft.
116
00:05:57,324 --> 00:05:59,588
Feeling all right, Quinn?
117
00:05:59,660 --> 00:06:01,958
I'm just really tired from Glee Club.
118
00:06:04,931 --> 00:06:07,456
Glee Club!
119
00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:11,436
Every time I try to destroy that clutch
of scab-eating mouth breathers...
120
00:06:11,505 --> 00:06:15,407
it only comes back stronger, like some
sexually ambiguous horror movie villain.
121
00:06:15,475 --> 00:06:19,377
Here I am, about to turn 30...
122
00:06:19,446 --> 00:06:23,405
and I've sacrificed everything
only to be shanghaied...
123
00:06:23,483 --> 00:06:25,542
by the bi-curious machinations of a cabal...
124
00:06:25,619 --> 00:06:27,917
of doughy, misshapen teens.
125
00:06:27,988 --> 00:06:30,718
Am I missing something, Journal?
126
00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:32,759
Is it me?
127
00:06:32,826 --> 00:06:35,056
Of course it's not me.
128
00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:37,153
It's Will Schuester.
129
00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:39,164
What is it about him, Journal?
130
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:41,166
Is it the arrogant smirk?
131
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:43,998
Is it the store-bought home perm?
132
00:06:44,071 --> 00:06:48,474
You know, Journal,
I noticed something yesterday.
133
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:51,943
- [Muffled]
- Of course...
134
00:06:52,012 --> 00:06:54,173
It's coming clear to me now.
135
00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:59,708
If I can't destroy the club,
I will have to destroy the man.
136
00:07:03,223 --> 00:07:05,157
Let me be frank.
137
00:07:05,225 --> 00:07:07,159
Your husband is hiding his kielbasa...
138
00:07:07,227 --> 00:07:10,628
in a Hickory Farms gift basket
that doesn't belong to you.
139
00:07:10,697 --> 00:07:13,165
What? With who?
140
00:07:13,233 --> 00:07:16,862
Guidance counselor.
Real floozy and a man-eater.
141
00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:20,031
Wears creepy broaches like the kind
my nana was buried in. More tea.
142
00:07:20,107 --> 00:07:23,372
- Oh, sorry.
- Oh, it's the same old song.
143
00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:26,674
- Wife puts on a couple extra pounds...
- I'm pregnant.
144
00:07:26,747 --> 00:07:28,942
Oh, that's no excuse.
145
00:07:29,015 --> 00:07:32,314
I've always thought the desire to procreate
showed deep, personal weakness.
146
00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:34,717
Me... Never wanted kids.
147
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:37,188
Don't have the time.
Don't have the uterus.
148
00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:41,988
- Are you sure about this?
- A woman always knows.
149
00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:45,498
- Yeah.
- Let me put it to you this way.
150
00:07:45,565 --> 00:07:49,331
If it's not a full-blown affair, well,
it's certainly heading in that direction.
151
00:07:49,402 --> 00:07:53,566
You need a machete to cut through
the haze of lust that surrounds them.
152
00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:55,972
Oh, God. What am I gonna do?
153
00:07:56,042 --> 00:07:58,510
I think you should both pack up
and move out of the district.
154
00:07:59,746 --> 00:08:01,907
Unless you wanna lose your man
to a mentally ill...
155
00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:04,576
ginger pygmy with eyes like a bush baby.
156
00:08:04,651 --> 00:08:07,814
Now, you're absolutely sure about this?
I mean, you have proof?
157
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:09,856
Get into that school, and sniff out...
158
00:08:09,923 --> 00:08:12,483
those sex pheromones for yourself.
159
00:08:12,559 --> 00:08:14,493
We happen to have an opening.
160
00:08:14,561 --> 00:08:17,223
Our school nurse,
Mrs. Lancaster, is in a coma.
161
00:08:17,297 --> 00:08:20,824
Oh, she took a terrible tumble
down the stairwell yesterday.
162
00:08:20,901 --> 00:08:24,029
[School Bell Rings]
163
00:08:24,104 --> 00:08:26,538
Aaah!
164
00:08:26,606 --> 00:08:30,406
- But I'm not a nurse. I work at Sheets 'N' Things.
- I'm not an American citizen.
165
00:08:30,477 --> 00:08:33,207
I was born in the Panama Canal Zone,
but I managed...
166
00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:35,680
to get a passport
and run for office twice.
167
00:08:35,749 --> 00:08:40,516
My advice to you,
if you wanna keep your husband...
168
00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:45,619
Get creative.
169
00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:50,254
Mrs. Schuester, I appreciate your interest
in the nursing position...
170
00:08:50,330 --> 00:08:53,697
but your previous experience
is limited to folding hand towels.
171
00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:55,860
As assistant manager
at Sheets 'N' Things...
172
00:08:55,936 --> 00:08:58,803
I've had first aid training. Mm-hmm.
173
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:02,933
- I've also used a defibrillator.
- Huh.
174
00:09:04,344 --> 00:09:06,369
So what did you want to talk to me about?
175
00:09:06,446 --> 00:09:08,380
Oh. Good news.
176
00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:10,473
I figured out a way
to get the kids motivated.
177
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:13,383
They're gonna compete
against each other in a glee-off.
178
00:09:13,453 --> 00:09:16,286
- Oh.
- And guess who the celebrity judge is gonna be.
179
00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:19,257
- You.
- Me?
180
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:24,155
You are the most honest
and impartial person I know.
181
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,760
Well, isn't this a surprise.
182
00:09:29,836 --> 00:09:31,770
Terri, wh-what are you doing here?
183
00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:34,068
Hi. I don't think
we've been properly introduced.
184
00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:36,131
I'm Terri Schuester, Will's pregnant wife.
185
00:09:36,209 --> 00:09:38,609
- Hi.
- Oh, honey...
186
00:09:38,678 --> 00:09:41,841
- Someone got a little lipstick on your cup.
- Sorry.
187
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,906
[Whimpers]
188
00:09:43,984 --> 00:09:46,009
I got it.
189
00:09:50,123 --> 00:09:52,091
Um, is-is everything okay, Terri?
190
00:09:52,158 --> 00:09:55,821
- You-You never visit me at work.
- Oh, I'm not visiting.
191
00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:59,024
No. You've been so stressed
about our finances lately...
192
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:02,262
that I thought I would pitch in
by getting a second job.
193
00:10:04,304 --> 00:10:06,272
I'm the new school nurse.
194
00:10:06,339 --> 00:10:08,432
But you're not a nurse.
195
00:10:08,508 --> 00:10:10,840
- You don't have any training.
- Oh, please, Will.
196
00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:13,607
It's a public school.
197
00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:16,949
Isn't this gonna be great?
198
00:10:17,017 --> 00:10:19,679
And this means that I'm gonna
be around all the time now.
199
00:10:27,928 --> 00:10:30,522
Know your routes.
200
00:10:30,597 --> 00:10:33,088
Now, that is the key
to this play, gentlemen.
201
00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:36,135
The receivers run
the fly route downfield...
202
00:10:36,202 --> 00:10:38,898
and then block as the play develops, okay?
203
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:41,463
Know your assignments. This is not...
204
00:10:41,541 --> 00:10:44,977
[Thinking]
I'm losing it. I'm tired all the time.
205
00:10:45,045 --> 00:10:46,979
I can't keep my eyes open.
206
00:10:47,047 --> 00:10:49,845
[Ken] That's your only job,
is to know your assignments.
207
00:10:49,916 --> 00:10:53,044
- [Will] No sharps, and no flats.
- I know how lucky I am...
208
00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:55,713
Captain of the football team, Glee stud.
209
00:10:55,789 --> 00:10:57,723
I know I should be excited about Quinn.
210
00:10:57,791 --> 00:11:00,385
She's hot, popular,
and she's carrying my baby and all...
211
00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:03,088
but I can't get Rachel out of my head.
212
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,757
She kind of freaks me out
in a Swimfan kind of way...
213
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:08,824
but she can really sing
and her body is smokin' ...
214
00:11:08,902 --> 00:11:11,029
if you're not into boobs.
215
00:11:11,104 --> 00:11:14,972
My body's a mess.
I found a hair on my ear the other day...
216
00:11:15,041 --> 00:11:17,874
and I have to rub Biofreeze on my shins
a couple times a day.
217
00:11:17,944 --> 00:11:19,935
Growing pains.
218
00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:22,447
It smells pretty bad,
but I mask it with Drakkar Noir.
219
00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:27,014
Being a guy my age is tough.
220
00:11:27,087 --> 00:11:29,487
Between Glee and football
and school and being popular...
221
00:11:29,556 --> 00:11:31,490
I'm just kind of overwhelmed.
222
00:11:31,558 --> 00:11:34,584
Everyone wants something from me,
and I don't have the energy to do it all.
223
00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:36,595
I don't know how important people
like presidents...
224
00:11:36,663 --> 00:11:39,461
or newscasters or mob bosses do it.
225
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,466
My mom says I'm stretched too thin...
226
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:43,627
so I gave up homework,
but that didn't help.
227
00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:46,433
All I know is, last night
I got vaporized on level two.
228
00:11:46,506 --> 00:11:50,135
Level two! And I didn't even
have the energy to care.
229
00:11:51,611 --> 00:11:54,045
[Kurt]
He's drooling.
230
00:11:54,114 --> 00:11:56,105
[Puck]
Dude, wake up.
231
00:11:56,182 --> 00:11:58,275
Sure, yeah. That sounds good.
232
00:11:58,351 --> 00:12:01,286
- I said, we can't let those girls beat us.
- Sorry.
233
00:12:01,354 --> 00:12:04,881
Sometimes when I'm thinking real hard,
it helps to close my eyes.
234
00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:07,483
We're doing a mash-up of"It's My Life"
and Usher's "Confessions."
235
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:11,087
We should get some trash can lids
and stomp the yard up in this piece.
236
00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:13,928
Puck, with respect, you're more helpful
when you don't contribute.
237
00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:17,663
Dude, what's wrong with you?
Go see the nurse.
238
00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:20,433
Every day I say I have a headache.
I sleep for three hours.
239
00:12:20,507 --> 00:12:23,965
I haven't attended
a math class in two years.
240
00:12:24,044 --> 00:12:27,138
[Inhales]
Oh. Thanks, guys.
241
00:12:27,213 --> 00:12:30,341
[Groans]
Keep up the good work.
242
00:12:30,417 --> 00:12:32,351
[School Bell Rings]
243
00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:39,191
Uh, okay, girls.
We need to get started.
244
00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:42,695
- We're getting warmed up.
- Where's Quinn?
245
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:46,129
Probably down at the mall
looking for elastic-waist pants.
246
00:12:46,199 --> 00:12:48,133
[Snickering]
247
00:12:50,036 --> 00:12:52,834
Mr. Schuester's right, you guys.
We can't get complacent.
248
00:12:52,906 --> 00:12:54,601
- Chill out.
- I already picked the songs.
249
00:12:54,674 --> 00:12:56,801
We're gonna do a mash-up of"Halo"
and "Walking on Sunshine."
250
00:12:56,876 --> 00:12:59,811
- Yeah, that was my idea.
- Whatever.
251
00:12:59,879 --> 00:13:02,245
Come on. We can do this in our sleep.
252
00:13:02,315 --> 00:13:04,715
You think those six dudes
are gonna give us any competition?
253
00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:08,151
- I say we just wing it.
- We can't just wing it.
254
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:10,781
All those in favor of winging it?
255
00:13:10,857 --> 00:13:13,655
All those opposed?
256
00:13:15,028 --> 00:13:17,690
Looks like the ayes have it.
257
00:13:24,404 --> 00:13:26,634
Hi. How can I help you?
258
00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:28,833
- Hey, Mrs. Schuester.
- Uh-huh.
259
00:13:28,908 --> 00:13:32,071
- I'm Finn Hudson. I'm in Glee with your husband.
- Well, hi, Finn.
260
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:35,410
Oh, wait a minute.
Are you the one who's dating Quinn Fabray?
261
00:13:35,482 --> 00:13:38,918
- Yeah. Why?
- Oh, you have really good bone structure.
262
00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:42,421
Yeah. Um, I've been really tired lately...
263
00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:45,322
and I was wondering if I could lie down
in here for a while.
264
00:13:45,391 --> 00:13:48,326
Why don't you have a seat.
265
00:13:48,394 --> 00:13:51,557
Why don't you tell me
a little bit about your sleep habits.
266
00:13:51,631 --> 00:13:54,156
- What time do you go to bed?
- Um, I don't know.
267
00:13:54,234 --> 00:13:57,726
Usually after "Skinemax"
starts playing regular movies again.
268
00:13:57,804 --> 00:14:00,238
And I'm normally tired, but lately...
269
00:14:00,306 --> 00:14:03,764
I can't just fall asleep.
It's like my brain won't shut up.
270
00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:07,040
Well, what are you thinking about?
271
00:14:07,113 --> 00:14:09,138
Oh, you can be honest with me.
272
00:14:09,215 --> 00:14:12,013
There's a code of silence in my office.
273
00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:16,613
- Okay, uh, football plays...
- Uh-huh.
274
00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:19,522
um, girls, dance steps...
275
00:14:20,793 --> 00:14:22,727
- girls.
- Girls?
276
00:14:22,795 --> 00:14:26,196
- But you're dating Quinn Fabray.
- Yeah, but...
277
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:33,066
- Do you think a guy can be into two girls at once?
- No.
278
00:14:33,139 --> 00:14:35,073
And remember, flirting is cheating.
279
00:14:35,141 --> 00:14:38,269
And the revenge of the jilted woman
is usually pretty messy.
280
00:14:38,344 --> 00:14:41,780
- So can I take my nap now?
- Do you want to sleep through your life, Finn?
281
00:14:41,848 --> 00:14:45,909
No, but I read once that teenagers
need more sleep than infants.
282
00:14:45,985 --> 00:14:48,681
When I was in high school,
I captained the cheerleading squad...
283
00:14:48,755 --> 00:14:51,747
I kept a perfect 4.0 G.P.A.,
I cultivated my popularity...
284
00:14:51,824 --> 00:14:54,258
and I maintained a loving relationship...
285
00:14:54,327 --> 00:14:56,625
with the boy who
would become my husband.
286
00:14:56,696 --> 00:14:59,062
Wow.
287
00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:02,101
I don't even know how I did that.
288
00:15:02,168 --> 00:15:04,102
Wait a minute.
289
00:15:04,170 --> 00:15:06,661
Yes, I do.
290
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,673
Pseudo ephedrine.
291
00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:11,175
It's the stuff they put in decongestants
to make them non-drowsy.
292
00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:13,804
It's kind of like a... Well, like a vitamin.
293
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:17,407
I would pop two of these blue meanies
every morning...
294
00:15:17,483 --> 00:15:20,418
and then I would be a firecracker
for the rest of the day.
295
00:15:20,486 --> 00:15:22,147
Are they safe?
296
00:15:22,222 --> 00:15:24,952
They're over-the-counter.
They stock them next to the candy bars.
297
00:15:25,024 --> 00:15:27,424
Sweetie, I'm the school nurse.
298
00:15:27,493 --> 00:15:29,961
I know what I'm doing.
299
00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:36,861
Hey, guys, how's it goin' ?
[Sniffs]
300
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:39,200
God, it's a beautiful day.
Let's run through the number.
301
00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:41,570
I can't wait to do the number.
I'm ready and excited.
302
00:15:41,641 --> 00:15:44,667
You guys stand up!
Come on. Let's get this joint jumping.
303
00:15:44,744 --> 00:15:47,304
Has your soul been taken over
by caffeinated space aliens?
304
00:15:47,380 --> 00:15:49,314
No, just visited the school nurse.
305
00:15:49,382 --> 00:15:52,943
Got this great vitamin. I feel fantastic.
I can't wait to do the number.
306
00:15:53,019 --> 00:15:55,249
Let's do the number, and then
afterwards we can build a house...
307
00:15:55,321 --> 00:15:57,255
for Habitat for Humanity.
308
00:15:57,323 --> 00:15:59,257
- What kind of vitamin?
- Vitamin C?
309
00:15:59,325 --> 00:16:02,055
Vogue magazine says it boosts energy
levels and brightens the complexion.
310
00:16:03,129 --> 00:16:05,188
Vitamin D. And I got you guys some.
311
00:16:07,233 --> 00:16:10,828
## [Mid-tempo Rock Beat]
312
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:14,361
# This ain't a song
for all the brokenhearted #
313
00:16:17,944 --> 00:16:21,710
# No silent prayer
for the faith departed #
314
00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:28,386
# And I ain't gonna be
just a face in the crowd #
315
00:16:28,454 --> 00:16:33,016
# You're gonna hear my voice
when I shout it out loud #
316
00:16:33,092 --> 00:16:35,720
# It's my life #
317
00:16:35,795 --> 00:16:39,026
# It's now or never #
318
00:16:39,098 --> 00:16:43,262
# I ain't gonna live forever #
319
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:46,737
# I just wanna live
while I'm alive #
320
00:16:46,806 --> 00:16:51,743
# It's my life #
321
00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:55,747
- # These are my confessions #
- # And just when I thought I said all I could say #
322
00:16:55,815 --> 00:16:59,182
# My chick on the side
said she got one on the way #
323
00:16:59,252 --> 00:17:04,349
- # Now, my confessions #
- # If I'm gonna tell it, then I gotta tell it all #
324
00:17:04,424 --> 00:17:08,451
# I damn near cried
when I got that phone call #
325
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:12,464
# I'm so thrown
I don't know what to do #
326
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:15,023
# But to give part two of my #
327
00:17:15,101 --> 00:17:17,535
# Better stand tall
when they're callin' you out #
328
00:17:17,603 --> 00:17:22,472
# Don't bend, don't break
Baby, don't back down #
329
00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:24,806
# These are my confessions #
330
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:28,074
# It's now or never #
331
00:17:28,147 --> 00:17:30,615
# I ain't gonna live forever #
332
00:17:30,683 --> 00:17:32,617
# These are my confessions #
333
00:17:32,685 --> 00:17:36,280
# I just wanna live
while I'm alive #
334
00:17:37,523 --> 00:17:39,491
# It's my life #
335
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:42,460
# Just when I thought I said
all I could say #
336
00:17:42,528 --> 00:17:45,326
# My chick on the side
said she got one on the way #
337
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:50,461
- # These are my confessions #
- # I just wanna live while I'm alive #
338
00:17:50,536 --> 00:17:54,734
# It's my life ##
339
00:17:54,807 --> 00:17:56,900
[Cheers, Applause]
340
00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:01,506
- Awesome, guys.
- Yeah!
341
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:03,515
Geez, I didn't know you had that in you.
342
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:05,983
It's like somebody slipped
something in your juice boxes.
343
00:18:06,052 --> 00:18:07,986
Ooh. You ladies better bring it tomorrow.
344
00:18:08,054 --> 00:18:10,318
Otherwise, whoo!
345
00:18:10,390 --> 00:18:12,358
We've got an opening number
for sectionals.
346
00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:14,450
[Whooping]
347
00:18:17,363 --> 00:18:19,297
Olé.
348
00:18:25,605 --> 00:18:27,470
[School Bell Rings]
349
00:18:33,780 --> 00:18:36,214
Haven't seen you at Glee rehearsals.
350
00:18:36,282 --> 00:18:38,944
I'm not Superwoman.
351
00:18:39,018 --> 00:18:42,385
I know Glee is your whole life,
but I have the Cheerios.
352
00:18:42,455 --> 00:18:44,787
I'm on honor roll. I have friends.
353
00:18:44,857 --> 00:18:47,451
You don't have to be embarrassed.
354
00:18:47,527 --> 00:18:49,927
No one at Glee is gonna judge you.
355
00:18:53,065 --> 00:18:55,966
Look, I know everyone expects us
to be enemies and be in competition...
356
00:18:56,035 --> 00:18:58,663
but I don't hate you.
357
00:18:58,738 --> 00:19:02,401
Why not? I've been awful to you.
358
00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:05,911
That was before you knew
what it felt like to be me...
359
00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:08,242
an outsider.
360
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:10,043
More people are gonna start
finding out about this...
361
00:19:10,116 --> 00:19:11,845
and you're gonna need
friends who can relate.
362
00:19:11,918 --> 00:19:13,909
How can you relate
to what I'm going through?
363
00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:16,648
You don't think people whisper
about me in the lunchrooms...
364
00:19:16,722 --> 00:19:20,214
or draw pornographic
pictures of me on the bathroom walls?
365
00:19:20,293 --> 00:19:22,352
That was me, actually.
366
00:19:23,763 --> 00:19:25,856
Look, I don't agree
with the choice you're making...
367
00:19:25,932 --> 00:19:27,866
but you're gonna need Glee.
368
00:19:27,934 --> 00:19:30,596
You have seven months of your youth left.
369
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:32,604
You should enjoy it. And let's face it.
370
00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:35,106
In a couple of months
that cheerleading uniform isn't gonna fit...
371
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,267
and we're gonna be all you have left.
372
00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:40,210
Just... come back to practice.
373
00:19:40,279 --> 00:19:42,213
Boys versus girls... It's fun.
374
00:19:42,281 --> 00:19:44,545
And we could certainly
use your voice right now.
375
00:19:44,617 --> 00:19:46,915
You're actually a good singer, Quinn.
376
00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:49,454
Occasionally sharp, but that's just
because you lack my years of training.
377
00:19:51,858 --> 00:19:55,089
I would have tortured you
if the roles were reversed, you know.
378
00:19:56,162 --> 00:19:58,096
I know.
379
00:20:05,671 --> 00:20:09,266
- [Line Ringing]
- Hi. It's Terri.
380
00:20:09,342 --> 00:20:11,902
Hi, Terri. This is Howard Bamboo.
381
00:20:11,978 --> 00:20:14,674
Yeah. I know that, Howard.
382
00:20:14,747 --> 00:20:17,215
Okay, you know how
I'm moonlighting as a nurse?
383
00:20:17,283 --> 00:20:19,751
- Well, I need a favor.
- O-Okay.
384
00:20:19,819 --> 00:20:22,515
Go to the drugstore and get me
a couple of boxes of decongestant.
385
00:20:22,588 --> 00:20:25,921
I'm running low, and I want the children
of McKinley to be healthy and happy.
386
00:20:25,992 --> 00:20:29,553
- Uh, h-how many boxes?
- Um...
387
00:20:29,629 --> 00:20:32,621
Thirty-six.
388
00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:34,632
Oh.
389
00:20:38,671 --> 00:20:42,334
- Hey, Terri.
- Oh. Hi, Ken. What's up?
390
00:20:47,213 --> 00:20:51,013
- Can we talk frank?
- Uh...
391
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:54,246
Listen.
392
00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:57,585
We have a problem. I think my girlfriend
is in love with your husband.
393
00:20:57,657 --> 00:20:59,682
And I wouldn't be surprised
if the feeling was mutual.
394
00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:02,694
- How long has this been going on?
- I don't know. A couple months.
395
00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:04,696
I see 'em together all the time...
396
00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:06,823
Laughing, talking.
All the stuff she never does with me.
397
00:21:06,899 --> 00:21:08,833
You know, I knew something was up.
398
00:21:08,901 --> 00:21:11,927
She couldn't keep her eyes off him
at those Acafella clown shows.
399
00:21:12,004 --> 00:21:15,440
Listen. Has Will
ever mentioned her to you?
400
00:21:15,508 --> 00:21:19,103
Oh, no, but he's too smart for that.
I mean, just barely, but still.
401
00:21:19,178 --> 00:21:21,112
Oh, Ken, I gotta be honest with you.
402
00:21:21,180 --> 00:21:24,547
I only took this job
so that I could keep an eye on him.
403
00:21:24,617 --> 00:21:28,144
We've got to put a stop to this
so that I can get out of here.
404
00:21:28,220 --> 00:21:31,348
See, I'm not built
to work five days a week.
405
00:21:31,424 --> 00:21:33,358
Well, I been thinking, maybe...
406
00:21:33,426 --> 00:21:35,451
that if you and I started
seeing each other on the side...
407
00:21:35,528 --> 00:21:37,462
it might kind of cancel their thing out.
408
00:21:38,864 --> 00:21:40,832
Are you two still having sex?
409
00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:43,664
Because, you know,
when that stops, something is up.
410
00:21:44,737 --> 00:21:47,171
We actually haven't, um, had sex yet.
411
00:21:47,239 --> 00:21:49,730
She doesn't like to be touched.
412
00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:53,711
- By me.
- Oh.
413
00:21:54,780 --> 00:21:57,749
God, I love her so much.
414
00:21:57,817 --> 00:22:01,514
Oh. Um, okay.
415
00:22:01,587 --> 00:22:04,454
- [Sobs Quietly]
- It's okay.
416
00:22:05,891 --> 00:22:07,825
There, there.
417
00:22:07,893 --> 00:22:10,020
- Look at the two of us.
- [Chuckles]
418
00:22:10,096 --> 00:22:12,656
You pregnant, and me with psoriasis...
419
00:22:12,732 --> 00:22:15,132
- Oh.
- and one testicle that won't descend.
420
00:22:15,201 --> 00:22:18,568
- I don't know who to feel more sorry for.
- Okay, that's enough.
421
00:22:18,638 --> 00:22:21,072
You know what?
You gotta stop being such a baby.
422
00:22:21,140 --> 00:22:24,371
- I cannot fix this unless you're willing to man up.
- Okay. I'm sorry.
423
00:22:24,443 --> 00:22:26,434
[Exhales]
424
00:22:27,513 --> 00:22:29,708
Here's what you're gonna do.
425
00:22:29,782 --> 00:22:33,616
You're going straight to the nearest
department store to buy her an engagement ring.
426
00:22:34,954 --> 00:22:37,115
Then you're gonna get down on one knee...
427
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:40,056
and you're gonna ask
that doe-eyed little harlot to marry you.
428
00:22:40,126 --> 00:22:43,618
No. I can't do that.
429
00:22:43,696 --> 00:22:46,130
What if she says no?
It might kill me.
430
00:22:50,636 --> 00:22:54,538
Take two of these,
then nothing can stop you.
431
00:22:58,010 --> 00:23:00,535
- I told you guys.
- We know.
432
00:23:00,613 --> 00:23:03,411
You've been berating us
for the better part of an hour.
433
00:23:03,482 --> 00:23:06,349
- Were they really that good?
- They were, Quinn. Look.
434
00:23:06,419 --> 00:23:09,786
I was fine with arranging, choreographing
and directing this number free of charge.
435
00:23:09,855 --> 00:23:12,415
But we underestimated the boys.
Their number will go to sectionals...
436
00:23:12,491 --> 00:23:14,584
and once again I will be humiliated.
437
00:23:14,660 --> 00:23:18,289
How were we supposed to know they'd
rock the house? They've never been good.
438
00:23:18,364 --> 00:23:22,801
- How did they d-d-do it?
- The real question is, what were they on?
439
00:23:22,868 --> 00:23:26,360
Though I've been grouped with the boys,
my allegiance still remains with you ladies.
440
00:23:26,439 --> 00:23:28,430
They declined my offer
to do their hair in cornrows...
441
00:23:28,507 --> 00:23:31,271
and all my artistic decisions
have been derided as too costly...
442
00:23:31,343 --> 00:23:34,107
because they involve several varieties
of exotic bird feathers.
443
00:23:35,481 --> 00:23:38,041
We all took something.
444
00:23:46,392 --> 00:23:49,384
My man, got next week's plays
all worked out. Yeah!
445
00:23:49,462 --> 00:23:51,862
Hey, Mr. Schue, got that paper
on Bariloche, Argentina, on your desk.
446
00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:55,162
- But it's not due for two weeks.
- Damn straight. I am in the zone!
447
00:23:55,234 --> 00:23:58,328
- Cheater.
- I don't know what you're talkin' about.
448
00:23:58,404 --> 00:24:02,135
- You took performance enhancers
before your mash-up. Kurt told me.
- Ah.
449
00:24:02,208 --> 00:24:05,837
It's deplorable, contemptible, and it's
just plain wrong. It's also cheating.
450
00:24:05,911 --> 00:24:08,903
- As a matter of fact,
I'm gonna start calling you "F-Rod."
- Hey, back off.
451
00:24:08,981 --> 00:24:13,213
I'm nothing like A-Rod, okay? I'd never
take steroids. They make your junk fall off.
452
00:24:13,285 --> 00:24:16,618
Listen, Rachel. You don't know what it's
like for me, the kind of pressure I'm un...
453
00:24:16,689 --> 00:24:20,022
Oh, we all have pressures. But you know
how I deal with it? The natural way...
454
00:24:20,092 --> 00:24:22,560
with a rigorous diet and exercise routine.
455
00:24:22,628 --> 00:24:25,392
- [Beeps]
- ## [Man Singing Reggae Pop]
456
00:24:25,464 --> 00:24:27,898
- I'm up at 6:00 a.m. every day.
- ## [Continues]
457
00:24:27,967 --> 00:24:31,130
I have my protein shake
with banana and flax seed oil...
458
00:24:31,203 --> 00:24:33,364
and by 6:10 I'm on the elliptical.
459
00:24:33,439 --> 00:24:36,533
- # Ain't nothin' gonna break-a my stride #
- You know how I motivate myself?
460
00:24:36,609 --> 00:24:38,702
Not with anything artificial.
I set a goal...
461
00:24:38,778 --> 00:24:41,804
- and I won't rest until I reach it.
- # I've got to keep on movin' ##
462
00:24:41,881 --> 00:24:45,078
Well, that's personal pressure. If you don't
meet your goal, you're the only one who loses.
463
00:24:45,151 --> 00:24:47,278
I have to be the quarterback,
th-the male lead...
464
00:24:47,353 --> 00:24:49,548
and deal with a pregnant girlfriend
who yells about ice cream.
465
00:24:49,622 --> 00:24:52,455
So, yeah, maybe I helped
me and my teammates out a little bit...
466
00:24:52,525 --> 00:24:56,052
but it's only because I'm sick and tired
of working so hard and still losing.
467
00:24:56,128 --> 00:24:59,063
- Yeah, but winning by cheating isn't winning.
- Oh, don't give me that.
468
00:24:59,131 --> 00:25:02,157
The reason you're so pissed about this is
you know you can't compete with us.
469
00:25:02,234 --> 00:25:04,168
Oh, I'm offended by that accusation.
470
00:25:04,236 --> 00:25:07,672
We haven't performed yet, but,
if I may say, our mash-up is spectacular!
471
00:25:07,740 --> 00:25:10,903
It still isn't gonna be as good.
We're gonna win. You're gonna lose.
472
00:25:10,976 --> 00:25:12,910
Deal with it.
473
00:25:17,583 --> 00:25:19,778
Everyone gets a dose.
474
00:25:19,852 --> 00:25:22,218
Oh, except for Quinn.
You get folic acid...
475
00:25:22,288 --> 00:25:24,222
[Quietly]
mama.
476
00:25:24,290 --> 00:25:26,986
[Whispers]
It's good for the baby.
477
00:25:28,227 --> 00:25:31,094
Get the lead out, Howard.
We have patients waiting.
478
00:25:32,498 --> 00:25:35,228
Are you sure we should be doing this?
479
00:25:35,301 --> 00:25:37,701
Oh, it's over-the-counter. It's safe.
480
00:25:37,770 --> 00:25:41,001
You can trust me. I'm a nurse.
481
00:25:41,073 --> 00:25:43,064
It's good for you.
482
00:25:51,951 --> 00:25:53,782
[Shredder Buzzing]
483
00:25:53,853 --> 00:25:55,787
[Chewing]
484
00:25:55,855 --> 00:25:58,449
- What's up with Ken?
- I know. Doesn't he have a healthy glow?
485
00:25:58,524 --> 00:26:00,458
I put him on a new vitamin regimen.
486
00:26:00,526 --> 00:26:03,791
Is that safe? I mean,
you're not really a nurse, Terri.
487
00:26:03,863 --> 00:26:05,990
Don't start criticizing my work, Will...
488
00:26:06,065 --> 00:26:08,056
not when I'm just getting my sea legs.
489
00:26:08,133 --> 00:26:09,896
[Sighs]
490
00:26:09,969 --> 00:26:12,267
[Mouths Word]
491
00:26:14,673 --> 00:26:16,937
Isn't this nice? I mean,
when is the last time...
492
00:26:17,009 --> 00:26:19,807
- we got to have lunch together
on a weekday, hmm?
- Hmm.
493
00:26:19,879 --> 00:26:23,781
Oh, honey, you have a little mustard... Just...
494
00:26:25,351 --> 00:26:27,410
[Stammers]
Geez, Terri.
495
00:26:27,486 --> 00:26:29,784
- This is my workplace.
- I'm sorry, honey.
496
00:26:29,855 --> 00:26:33,655
- It's just that my hormones
are going really crazy for you.
- Hey, look. Look.
497
00:26:34,827 --> 00:26:37,762
You being here...
is not good for our marriage.
498
00:26:37,830 --> 00:26:40,856
Spending time together
is not good for our marriage?
499
00:26:40,933 --> 00:26:44,334
Not every minute.
There's no separation.
500
00:26:44,403 --> 00:26:48,134
We used to come home every night
a-and talk about our day.
501
00:26:48,207 --> 00:26:50,141
Now we have nothing to say to each other.
502
00:26:51,677 --> 00:26:55,238
A lot of ants on the sidewalk today.
503
00:26:58,417 --> 00:27:00,715
Pretty late in the season for that.
504
00:27:02,254 --> 00:27:06,953
I think this is just forcing us
to expand our intellectual horizons.
505
00:27:07,026 --> 00:27:08,516
- Where are you going?
- The bathroom.
506
00:27:08,594 --> 00:27:10,721
- I'll come with you.
- No.
507
00:27:10,796 --> 00:27:14,027
I love you, but... I need my space.
508
00:27:18,237 --> 00:27:21,172
- Hmph.
- [Buzzing Continues]
509
00:27:24,710 --> 00:27:28,146
- Now's your chance, Ken.
- What, here? Now?
510
00:27:30,749 --> 00:27:32,683
- Hi, Emma.
- Hi, Ken.
511
00:27:32,751 --> 00:27:35,413
- [Grunts]
- What are you doing?
512
00:27:35,487 --> 00:27:37,614
Look, Emma. I know our relationship
hasn't been perfect.
513
00:27:37,690 --> 00:27:40,488
You won't ride in my car.
I can't touch you above the wrist.
514
00:27:40,559 --> 00:27:44,086
Remember, you cried for an hour that time my
elbow accidentally brushed by your breast.
515
00:27:44,163 --> 00:27:46,097
But I think about you all day long.
516
00:27:46,165 --> 00:27:49,760
I kiss that picture of us at the state
fair every night before I go to sleep.
517
00:27:51,337 --> 00:27:53,862
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
This isn't happening. This is a dream.
518
00:27:53,939 --> 00:27:57,397
- Emma Pillsbury, this is not an engagement ring.
- Oh, thank goodness.
519
00:27:57,476 --> 00:28:01,003
No. I mean, it is. But I-it's more than
that. It's... It's a promise.
520
00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:04,948
Look, Emma. I know you have
this thing about being clean.
521
00:28:05,017 --> 00:28:08,885
Now I can't promise to pick up my
underwear or squeegee the shower door...
522
00:28:08,954 --> 00:28:12,617
but I can promise
to keep your life clean of sadness...
523
00:28:12,691 --> 00:28:16,388
and loneliness... and any other dark
clouds that might float into it.
524
00:28:19,798 --> 00:28:24,735
It's cubic zirconia. I know how affected
you were by Blood Diamond.
525
00:28:24,803 --> 00:28:30,241
Emma Pillsbury... "M&M"...
will you marry me?
526
00:28:30,309 --> 00:28:34,245
[Breathes Deeply]
527
00:28:37,116 --> 00:28:40,779
Thank you so much. It really is a pleasure.
While the boys chose songs that cast an eye...
528
00:28:40,853 --> 00:28:44,289
inward on the irresponsible life choices
and sexual hunger of today's modern teens...
529
00:28:44,356 --> 00:28:47,348
we have chosen a selection of songs that
speaks to the nation as a whole...
530
00:28:47,426 --> 00:28:50,987
during these troubling times filled with
economic uncertainty and unbridled social woe.
531
00:28:51,063 --> 00:28:54,157
Because if there's two things America needs
right now, that is sunshine and optimism.
532
00:28:55,467 --> 00:28:58,561
Also angels.
[Breathing Deeply]
533
00:29:00,506 --> 00:29:03,669
- Okay.
- ## [Piano Intro, Arpeggios]
534
00:29:10,382 --> 00:29:13,078
- # Oh #
- ## [Rock, Fast]
535
00:29:13,152 --> 00:29:15,416
# Remember those walls I built #
536
00:29:15,487 --> 00:29:18,012
# Well, baby, they're tumblin' down #
537
00:29:18,090 --> 00:29:20,923
# They didn't even
put up a fight #
538
00:29:20,993 --> 00:29:23,120
# They didn't even make a sound #
539
00:29:23,195 --> 00:29:25,288
# It's like I've been awakened #
540
00:29:25,364 --> 00:29:27,992
# Every rule I had you breakin' #
541
00:29:28,067 --> 00:29:32,766
# It's the risk that I'm takin'
I am never gonna shut you out #
542
00:29:32,838 --> 00:29:35,602
# Everywhere I'm lookin' now #
543
00:29:35,674 --> 00:29:37,938
# I'm surrounded
by your embrace #
544
00:29:38,010 --> 00:29:39,944
- # Baby, I can feel your halo #
- # Oh #
545
00:29:40,012 --> 00:29:42,776
- # And don't it feel good #
- # I can feel your halo #
546
00:29:42,848 --> 00:29:45,783
- # Halo #
- # I can see your halo #
547
00:29:45,851 --> 00:29:47,819
- # Halo #
- # I can see your halo #
548
00:29:47,886 --> 00:29:51,447
- # Halo #
- # I can see your halo, and don't it feel good #
549
00:29:51,523 --> 00:29:54,617
- ## [Faster]
- # I used to think maybe you loved me #
550
00:29:54,693 --> 00:29:56,661
# Now, baby, I'm sure #
551
00:30:00,432 --> 00:30:05,665
# And I just can't wait till the day
when you knock on my door #
552
00:30:07,139 --> 00:30:11,872
# Oh, now, now I'm walkin'
on sunshine, whoa #
553
00:30:11,944 --> 00:30:16,540
# I'm walkin' on sunshine, whoa #
554
00:30:16,615 --> 00:30:19,709
- # And don't it feel good, Hey #
- # I can feel your halo, halo #
555
00:30:19,785 --> 00:30:22,845
# All right now, ho #
556
00:30:22,921 --> 00:30:26,880
- # I can feel your halo, halo #
- # Hey, oh, yea-a-ah #
557
00:30:26,959 --> 00:30:31,692
- # I can feel your halo, halo #
- # Hey, halo-o-o #
558
00:30:31,763 --> 00:30:34,926
- # I can feel your halo, halo #
- # Hey, halo-o-o #
559
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:39,266
- # I can see your halo, Halo-o-o ##
- ## [Ends]
560
00:30:41,573 --> 00:30:44,599
Whoo! Ha-ha!
561
00:30:44,676 --> 00:30:47,338
Ladies, I... I don't even know what to say.
562
00:30:47,412 --> 00:30:50,074
You did such a good job.
563
00:30:50,149 --> 00:30:53,016
I don't know what you guys did,
but whatever it was, keep doing it!
564
00:30:53,085 --> 00:30:56,543
Our celebrity judge
has her work cut out for her.
565
00:30:56,622 --> 00:30:59,386
- [School Bell Rings]
- Hey, great job, guys.
566
00:31:00,559 --> 00:31:04,518
Okay. All right.
[Chuckles] Whoo. What the...
567
00:31:05,464 --> 00:31:07,523
- Ha!
- [Both Chuckle]
568
00:31:07,599 --> 00:31:12,536
- Hey, Emma, um, can you walk with me?
- Yeah.
569
00:31:14,439 --> 00:31:18,535
- Well, I think your, uh... think your plan worked.
- Yeah. [Chuckles]
570
00:31:18,610 --> 00:31:21,272
Instilling a sense
of good, clean competition in these kids...
571
00:31:21,346 --> 00:31:24,008
I think, um...
I think you really motivated them.
572
00:31:24,082 --> 00:31:28,644
Well, actually, I consider you a co conspirator.
We came up with the idea together.
573
00:31:29,721 --> 00:31:32,189
So...
574
00:31:32,257 --> 00:31:34,487
is it true about Ken asking to marry you?
575
00:31:35,694 --> 00:31:38,094
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
576
00:31:40,632 --> 00:31:43,123
What are you gonna do?
577
00:31:43,202 --> 00:31:45,136
I don't know.
578
00:31:45,204 --> 00:31:47,365
Can you, um...
579
00:31:47,439 --> 00:31:49,907
Can you think of
any other options I might have?
580
00:31:53,679 --> 00:31:56,409
I-Is that a reason to marry someone?
581
00:31:57,916 --> 00:31:59,850
That's not what I'm asking.
582
00:32:06,892 --> 00:32:09,019
[School Bell Rings]
583
00:32:12,731 --> 00:32:15,222
Emma.
584
00:32:15,300 --> 00:32:18,326
Terri. Um...
585
00:32:18,403 --> 00:32:21,201
Hi. What can I, uh...
586
00:32:21,273 --> 00:32:24,174
What can I... do for you?
587
00:32:24,243 --> 00:32:26,302
I just wanted to cut to the chase...
588
00:32:26,378 --> 00:32:28,778
that things have been a little awkward
since I started working here.
589
00:32:28,847 --> 00:32:32,305
- I just wanted to clear the air.
- Oh.
590
00:32:32,384 --> 00:32:35,820
That's, um... That's actually really nice.
Why don't you just...
591
00:32:35,887 --> 00:32:39,050
You have no chance with my husband.
Do I make myself clear?
592
00:32:39,124 --> 00:32:42,719
Oh, you might think there's some kind of
competition going on between you and I...
593
00:32:42,794 --> 00:32:45,786
but that's like saying
that a nail is competing with a hammer.
594
00:32:45,864 --> 00:32:47,855
[Chuckles]
595
00:32:49,134 --> 00:32:51,227
- Terri, Will is a good man.
- Uh-huh.
596
00:32:51,303 --> 00:32:53,237
He's kind...
597
00:32:53,305 --> 00:32:57,901
and he's generous,
and he deserves a lot better than you.
598
00:32:57,976 --> 00:33:01,571
Emma, Will is my husband.
599
00:33:03,148 --> 00:33:05,275
Look at you.
600
00:33:05,350 --> 00:33:09,753
You are so superior, because you're nice
to a man that you see for an hour or two a day.
601
00:33:09,821 --> 00:33:13,518
You're just an innocent little dove. Hmm?
602
00:33:13,592 --> 00:33:17,255
You're so innocent that you would steal
a man away from his pregnant wife.
603
00:33:17,329 --> 00:33:19,263
[Quietly]
Yeah.
604
00:33:19,331 --> 00:33:23,893
Do yourself a favor, honey.
Marry Ken Tanaka.
605
00:33:23,969 --> 00:33:27,200
Oh, sure, he's dumb like sand,
and his fondue pot of nationalities...
606
00:33:27,272 --> 00:33:29,832
is gonna open your kids up
to a host of genetic diseases...
607
00:33:29,908 --> 00:33:33,366
but he's kind, and he's generous.
608
00:33:33,445 --> 00:33:36,073
And he's available.
609
00:33:39,518 --> 00:33:43,386
[Door Opens, Closes]
610
00:33:43,455 --> 00:33:45,389
- [School Bell Rings]
- [Quietly] Hmm.
611
00:33:48,527 --> 00:33:50,461
[School Bell Rings]
612
00:33:53,465 --> 00:33:55,399
- Mrs. Schuester.
- Mm-hmm.
613
00:33:55,467 --> 00:33:58,698
I need to talk to you...
[Quietly] about the baby.
614
00:33:58,770 --> 00:34:01,739
Is everything okay? Wait, you're not
having it right now, are you?
615
00:34:01,807 --> 00:34:05,709
- What? No. Aren't you supposed to be a nurse?
- Mm-hmm.
616
00:34:09,481 --> 00:34:12,712
- I've been thinking about your offer.
- Yeah?
617
00:34:12,784 --> 00:34:15,309
I like my life.
618
00:34:16,388 --> 00:34:18,754
I like being a cheerleader...
619
00:34:18,824 --> 00:34:24,694
and I can't believe I'm actually saying this,
but I really like being in Glee Club.
620
00:34:24,763 --> 00:34:29,496
I have all these great things in my life,
and it already feels like too much.
621
00:34:31,670 --> 00:34:35,071
[Whispers]
I can't raise a baby.
622
00:34:35,140 --> 00:34:37,404
[Sighs]
623
00:34:37,476 --> 00:34:40,809
You know, honestly, I don't even know
how you kids do it nowadays.
624
00:34:40,879 --> 00:34:43,973
I mean, I-I didn't have it this bad
when I was your age.
625
00:34:44,049 --> 00:34:47,644
I mean, there weren't as many
TV channels either though.
626
00:34:47,719 --> 00:34:49,687
Is Finn okay with this?
'Cause, you know...
627
00:34:49,755 --> 00:34:52,622
I don't want any baby-daddy drama
when you hand it over to me.
628
00:34:52,691 --> 00:34:56,092
He's the reason I'm doing this.
629
00:34:56,161 --> 00:35:00,427
He's such a good guy.
And he internalizes all this pressure.
630
00:35:00,499 --> 00:35:03,332
He's gonna have a heart attack.
631
00:35:03,402 --> 00:35:09,034
I never want Mr. Schuester to find out about
this though. I don't wanna hurt him either.
632
00:35:09,107 --> 00:35:11,667
Oh, your secret's safe with me.
633
00:35:11,743 --> 00:35:13,677
I have a lot more to lose.
634
00:35:13,745 --> 00:35:16,873
One more thing.
635
00:35:16,948 --> 00:35:20,213
- You know how you gave me
those vitamins for the baby?
- Mm-hmm.
636
00:35:20,285 --> 00:35:22,583
I really appreciated that...
637
00:35:22,654 --> 00:35:25,680
um, but I'm gonna have
all these doctors' bills...
638
00:35:25,757 --> 00:35:27,691
and I'm gonna need
some new maternity clothes.
639
00:35:27,759 --> 00:35:31,286
- You want money from me?
- It's gonna be your baby.
640
00:35:31,363 --> 00:35:35,390
Which means I'm gonna be paying the bills for
18 years. I think you can handle nine months.
641
00:35:35,467 --> 00:35:40,097
Look, you're making the right call here,
Quinn. It's what's best for everybody.
642
00:35:48,613 --> 00:35:50,547
[Sighs]
643
00:35:55,153 --> 00:35:56,882
Hi.
644
00:36:00,926 --> 00:36:02,860
Hi.
645
00:36:04,095 --> 00:36:06,086
Um, I can't...
I can't stay long in this room...
646
00:36:06,164 --> 00:36:09,258
because of the germs, you know,
and because of the odor.
647
00:36:11,102 --> 00:36:14,401
But I have a question.
648
00:36:14,473 --> 00:36:16,441
Anything for you, Emma.
649
00:36:18,844 --> 00:36:21,404
So what would, um...
650
00:36:21,480 --> 00:36:25,075
what would getting married
mean... exactly?
651
00:36:26,151 --> 00:36:29,450
Because I would wanna keep my last name...
652
00:36:29,521 --> 00:36:33,480
and I'd wanna continue living
in different parts of town.
653
00:36:33,558 --> 00:36:37,551
And, um, I think it would be best
if we didn't see each other after school.
654
00:36:37,629 --> 00:36:39,597
Sure.
655
00:36:39,664 --> 00:36:44,795
And I wouldn't want a big ceremony, you
know, like in a church or with... people.
656
00:36:44,870 --> 00:36:47,395
We wouldn't have to invite anybody,
you know, or tell anybody actually.
657
00:36:47,472 --> 00:36:50,134
It could be more like a secret, you know...
like a secret marriage.
658
00:36:50,208 --> 00:36:53,405
That's actually a better deal
than I expected.
659
00:36:55,113 --> 00:36:57,274
You're a really good man, Ken.
660
00:37:00,051 --> 00:37:04,283
And I don't want to spend
the rest of my life alone...
661
00:37:04,356 --> 00:37:07,052
and I know that you don't either.
662
00:37:10,362 --> 00:37:12,353
So...
663
00:37:13,565 --> 00:37:15,499
is that a yes?
664
00:37:21,206 --> 00:37:23,106
What's up, A-Rach?
665
00:37:23,174 --> 00:37:25,938
Hey, sweet mash-up.
You guys were so... energetic.
666
00:37:26,011 --> 00:37:28,844
We were just taking a lesson
from Major League Baseball.
667
00:37:28,914 --> 00:37:31,576
l-l-It's not cheating
if everyone's doing it.
668
00:37:31,650 --> 00:37:34,847
- We were just leveling out the playing field.
- You really believe that?
669
00:37:37,255 --> 00:37:40,349
No. Okay? I-I feel terrible.
670
00:37:40,425 --> 00:37:42,689
Even if we win,
it's not gonna be satisfying.
671
00:37:42,761 --> 00:37:46,492
I know. I don't even remember performing.
672
00:37:46,565 --> 00:37:49,227
What do you think we should do?
673
00:37:49,301 --> 00:37:53,431
I think... the only way to make things right
is to just withdraw from the competition...
674
00:37:53,505 --> 00:37:57,669
You know, admit that we were wrong and
disqualify our respective teams immediately.
675
00:37:57,742 --> 00:38:01,337
- No one gets to win.
- Cool.
676
00:38:03,348 --> 00:38:09,218
I'm sorry about what I said the other day, about
calling you contemptible and deplorable.
677
00:38:09,287 --> 00:38:12,279
Ah, that's all right.
I didn't even know what those words meant.
678
00:38:12,357 --> 00:38:15,690
W-What I meant to say is that...
679
00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:18,820
I guess I get caught up
in the competitive hysteria too.
680
00:38:18,897 --> 00:38:20,831
My goals are too selfish.
681
00:38:20,899 --> 00:38:24,232
You know, it's time for me to stop
competing against everyone...
682
00:38:24,302 --> 00:38:27,999
- and start competing alongside them.
- [School Bell Rings]
683
00:38:34,779 --> 00:38:36,838
What the hell were you thinking?
684
00:38:36,915 --> 00:38:39,907
- You gave drugs to my students?
- I'll say it again.
685
00:38:39,985 --> 00:38:43,546
They are over-the-counter, F.D.A. approved,
and if I didn't give it to them...
686
00:38:43,622 --> 00:38:46,056
I'm sure the kids would just
find a way to get it for themselves.
687
00:38:46,124 --> 00:38:49,890
- No. No, they wouldn't. These are good kids.
- Nothing bad happened.
688
00:38:49,961 --> 00:38:51,895
Howard Bamboo got arrested.
689
00:38:54,833 --> 00:38:57,700
- Well, that.
- Wait. What?
690
00:38:57,769 --> 00:39:02,729
Pseudo ephedrine is an ingredient
in the manufacturing of methamphetamines.
691
00:39:02,807 --> 00:39:05,503
Howard got picked up by the feds on
suspicion of running a crystal meth lab.
692
00:39:05,577 --> 00:39:08,045
I never told Howard
to get them all in one place.
693
00:39:08,113 --> 00:39:10,047
Okay, enough, Terri.
694
00:39:10,115 --> 00:39:12,106
How are we supposed to raise a baby...
695
00:39:12,183 --> 00:39:15,675
when I can't trust you
to look after a group of teenagers?
696
00:39:15,754 --> 00:39:17,688
You are oblivious to consequences.
697
00:39:17,756 --> 00:39:21,283
- I was only trying to help you, Will.
- Don't.
698
00:39:21,359 --> 00:39:25,125
Every time I light a fire in my life...
699
00:39:25,196 --> 00:39:28,597
you find a way to make sure
it burns the forest down.
700
00:39:32,103 --> 00:39:35,095
I have serious concerns
about your judgment, Mrs. Schuester.
701
00:39:35,173 --> 00:39:37,767
I must ask you to resign as school nurse.
702
00:39:39,077 --> 00:39:42,774
Fine. I was working too hard anyway.
703
00:39:44,716 --> 00:39:49,312
Hold on to your horses, Schue. I have to
question your judgment in the matter as well.
704
00:39:49,387 --> 00:39:51,787
What? I had no idea
this was even going on.
705
00:39:51,856 --> 00:39:55,417
Exactly. The children rely
on you to create the culture...
706
00:39:55,493 --> 00:40:00,294
and you, with your obsession
with winning and competition...
707
00:40:00,365 --> 00:40:03,391
has fostered an unsafe environment.
708
00:40:03,468 --> 00:40:06,596
I'm bringing in someone else
to co chair the Glee Club.
709
00:40:06,671 --> 00:40:11,836
Someone with a track record
of responsibility and excellence.
710
00:40:13,978 --> 00:40:16,173
We're really sorry, Mr. Schue.
711
00:40:16,247 --> 00:40:18,306
We didn't mean to get you into trouble.
712
00:40:19,884 --> 00:40:23,149
I'm really disappointed in you guys.
713
00:40:23,221 --> 00:40:25,155
Glee is supposed to be about
what's inside your heart...
714
00:40:25,223 --> 00:40:27,123
not what's coursing through your veins.
715
00:40:27,192 --> 00:40:29,752
We know, and I think
I speak for everyone when I say...
716
00:40:29,828 --> 00:40:32,820
that we'd be happy to move forward
and put this episode behind us.
717
00:40:32,897 --> 00:40:35,161
Well, it's not that simple.
718
00:40:35,233 --> 00:40:37,167
Because of this debacle...
719
00:40:37,235 --> 00:40:40,033
it's been decided that I'm no longer fit
to run Glee Club myself.
720
00:40:41,172 --> 00:40:43,800
We've been assigned a co director.
721
00:40:43,875 --> 00:40:45,775
Who?
722
00:40:45,844 --> 00:40:47,709
Hey, kids.
[Chuckles]
723
00:40:47,779 --> 00:40:50,543
I gotta tell ya, I'm just thrilled...
724
00:40:50,615 --> 00:40:52,549
to becoming on board...
725
00:40:52,617 --> 00:40:55,916
to co captain your little showbiz cruise.
726
00:40:55,987 --> 00:40:58,012
Ah, I can't wait to start
singin' and dancin' ...
727
00:40:58,089 --> 00:41:00,523
and maybe even puttin' on
the Ritz a little bit.
728
00:41:05,964 --> 00:41:08,524
Will?
729
00:41:15,340 --> 00:41:18,207
I wanted you to, um... to hear this from me.
730
00:41:20,612 --> 00:41:23,479
You know Ken, um, asked me to marry him.
731
00:41:26,050 --> 00:41:28,041
I said yes.
732
00:41:29,888 --> 00:41:31,822
That's...
733
00:41:33,591 --> 00:41:35,525
That's great.
734
00:41:45,370 --> 00:41:47,304
[Footsteps Recede]
735
00:42:12,297 --> 00:42:14,231
[School Bell Rings]
736
00:42:24,509 --> 00:42:26,443
[Beeps]
737
00:42:26,511 --> 00:42:28,445
[Man]
# Ain't nothing gonna break my stride #
738
00:42:28,513 --> 00:42:31,380
# Nobody gonna slow me down #
739
00:42:31,449 --> 00:42:34,976
# Oh, no, I got to keep on movin' #
740
00:42:35,053 --> 00:42:37,248
# Ain't nothin' gonna
break my stride #
741
00:42:37,322 --> 00:42:40,086
# I'm runnin' and I won't touch ground #
742
00:42:40,158 --> 00:42:44,151
# Oh, no, I've got to keep on movin' ##
743
00:42:46,197 --> 00:42:50,463
## [Vocalizing]
744
00:42:50,535 --> 00:42:54,801
## [Harmonic Vocalizing]
745
00:43:09,854 --> 00:43:11,913
## [Ends]