So here's whad on Glee:
Jesse left Vocal Adrenaline... JESSE: I'm a star.
You can learn from me. ...so he could date Rachel, so now he's
part of the glee club. Great to have you here.
And they're the new power couple.
Previous power couples: Rachel and Finn...
I made us his and her relationship calendars.
Oh. ...also, Rachel and Puck.
Want to make out? Sure.
Will still has a crush on Emma...
I could just lean over and kiss you if I want to. And I want to.
But he hasn't divorced Terri yet, and he made out
with the coach of Vocal Adrenaline.
Most of the show choir directors I make out with are gay.
And Sue? Sloppy freak show babies!
Still just kind of angry about everything.
SUE: Who wants a piece of it? Huh?
And that's what you missed on Glee.
(laughter)
("Physical" by Olivia Newton-John playing)
What's so funny?
You guys aren't watching the video of me falling
off stage at my first TinyTots beauty pageant, are you?
That was Carrot Top funny
compared to this comedic tour de force.
JESSIE: That's Olivia Newton-John's "Physical."
It was pretty groundbreaking subject matter at the time,
considering it's depiction of fluid sexuality.
MERCEDES: Oh, my good... (laughter)
Wait, wait.
That's not Olivia Newton-John.
That's, that's Sue Sylvester.
Where did you get this?
I can tell you that I certainly did not
steal it from her locked file cabinet yesterday
when she sent me back to her office
to get her hormone replacement injection
during Cheerios! practice.
(laughter)
Wait,
did she just do the Cabbage Patch?
(laughter)
I'm posting this on YouTube.
RACHEL: No, no, wait, wait.
Do you think that's a good idea?
She might kill us.
Oh, let her get a taste of some of
the humiliation she put us through.
JESSIE: I'm with Finn.
You guys need to stop being such asses and start being bad-asses.
(laughter)
Ten bucks it goes viral by lunch.
âª Let's get animal, animal... âª
Hey, Ms. Sylvester.
Let's get physical.
Not really my type, but I like that attitude.
Hey, Sue!
Let's get animal!
(school bell ringing)
That glee club stole my private property and posted it online.
And as soon as I figure out
the difference between slander and libel,
I'm filing a lawsuit.
WILL: Sue, don't you think
you might be overstating this a little?
Will, I may buy a small diaper for your chin,
because it looks like a baby's ass.
That video has received over 170,000 comments.
I took the liberty of printing out a few.
"The man in this video looks like
the champion cheerleading coach Sue Sylvester."
That was particularly hurtful.
(clears throat) You know, Sue, there are a lot
of people at this school who dislike you.
My kids don't do stuff like this.
Is that so?
Exhibit B.
What's a "Glist"?
It's the "Glee List" William.
It's a weekly ranking of your glee club,
based on a hotness quotient of sexual promiscuity.
It was posted all over the school an hour ago.
Apparently, you get a point
for each act of perpetuated depravity.
What makes you think my kids did this?
This Glist was made on a library computer
using the pass code "gleeclub."
Your glee club is a petri dish of sexual depravity.
Sue's right, Will.
Why, only last year, a list was posted
ranking McKinley's ten ugliest Gingers.
And the perpetrator would have
been expelled had it not turned out
to be a member of the faculty!
I stand by that list.
William, this is serious.
I cannot have an environment that sexualizes children
and damages their self-esteem!
You know, a week ago, had I fod a list
that so degraded the glee club, I would've been embarrassed
I was beaten to the punch.
But now I know the white-hot shame
of public rebuke-- that pain is indescribable.
William, last year, at West Dayton High,
a photo circulated of
school superintendent... And what was he wearing?
Women's lingerie. And what was he riding?
Pony! And who was expelled?
The entire school!
The entire school was expelled, will!
What does that have to do with me?
You must find out who made the Glist
and suspend them before they post another one,
or I'm holding the entire glee club responsible!
Are you serious?
Deadly serious!
I cannot have these shenanigans at this school!
He cannot have these shenanigans at this school!
Translate By Mumy [iSubs.coil.us.to] Sync By YesCool [Addic7ed.com].
Who did it?
This is serious.
Principal Figgins is threatening to disband the club.
Why are we playing this game?
We all know it was Puck.
Back off. I didn't do squat.
Then why is your girlfriend first on the Glist?
And why am I last?
Aside from the fact that I refused to put out for you.
Okay, enough! No one is accusing anyone of anything.
Puck, seriously, did you do it?
I said no.
I'm a delinquent, sure.
I like setting stuff on fire
and ating up people I don't know.
I own at. But I'm not a liar.
All right, here's the important point.
Between this and posting Coach Sylvester's
personal video on YouTube, you guys are getting
a pretty bad reputation.
Why is that a bad thing?
Maybe if we seem more dangerous,
people would stop flushing my glasses down the toilet.
Look, things are hard right now.
I get it. You're under a lot
of pressure with regionals coming up.
And I know that winning sectionals hasn't had
the positive effect on your popularity
that a lot of you thought it would.
But becoming what you despise is not the answer.
Man, this song is wack.
No, it's not.
It's a terrific song
on a long list of top hits that,
because of time or some bad press, has become a joke.
And, like you guys, it's time to start
rehabilitating its bad reputation.
The assignment for the week
is for all of you to find songs like this,
mine them for what works
and make them great again.
And then, hopefully,
can apply this musical lesson to your own lives.
This song should be arrested for the crime of sucking.
(laughter) Mm-hmm.
You want to bet?
(oohing, murmuring) Oh, no, he didn't.
Hit it.
("Ice Ice Baby" playing)
âª Yo, V.I.P. âª
âª Let's kick it âª
(laughter)
âª Ice, Ice, baby âª
âª All right, stop, collaborate and listen âª
âª Ice is back with a brand-new invention âª
âª Something grabs ahold of me tightly âª
âª Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly âª
âª Will it ever stop? Yo, I don't know âª
âª Turn off the lights, huh âª
âª And I'll glow, to the extreme âª
âª I rock a mic like a vandal âª
âª Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle âª
âª Dance, go rush the speaker that booms âª
âª I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom âª
âª Deadly, when I play a dope melody âª
âª Anything less than the best is a felony âª
âª Love it or leave it, you better gangway âª
âª You better hit the bull's-eye âª
âª The kid don't play âª
âª If there was a problem, yo, I'll solve it âª
âª Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it âª
âª Ice, Ice, baby âª
Oh!
âª Vanilla Ice, Ice, baby âª
(whooping) Verse two!
âª Take heed 'cause I'm a lyrical poet âª
âª Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it âª
âª My town that created all th bass sound, enough to shake âª
âª And kick holes in the ground 'cause my style's âª
âª Like a chemical spill âª
âª Feasible rhymes you can vision and feel âª
âª Conducted and formed, that's a hell of a concept âª
âª We make it hype and you want to step with this âª
âª Shay plays on the fade, slice like a ninja âª
âª Cut like a razor blade âª
âª So fast, other DJs say, "damn" âª
âª If my rhyme was a drug âª
âª I'd sell it by the gram, keep my composure âª
âª When it's time to get loose âª
âª Magnetized by the mic while I kick my juice âª
âª If there was a problem, yo, I'll solve it âª
âª Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it âª
âª Ice, Ice, baby âª
(rhythmic shouting)
âª Vanilla Ice, Ice, baby âª
(whooping)
âª Vanilla Ice, Ice, baby âª
âª Too cold, too cold âª
âª Vanilla Ice, Ice, baby. âª
Yo, man, let's get out of here.
Word to your mother.
(music stops, laughter)
This song is officially paroled!
(cheering)
Right, Jessie?
You got me?
(bell ringing)
(murmuring)
SUE: This is not happening.
The cruel slow-motion laughter is just your imagination.
You're Sue Sylvester-- legend.
They're not laughing at you
because of your "Physical" video.
Just calmly pour yourself a cup of joe and focus.
Wait, what's that smell?
Dear God, that's coffee.
It's usually masked by the smell of fear.
Sweet merciful Lord, this is happening!
You're being laughed at in slow motion
by a roomful of inferiors whom you used to terrify.
The name is Brenda.
Brenda Castle.
I just transferred from Fort Wayne.
I can't teach in Indiana anymore
'cause I have some "drug problems"
that ended up involving some of my "shoot-ins."
(laughing): I saw your video.
And you, my friend, are an embarrassment.
And that's me talking!
(laughter echoes)
(bell ringing)
I need to enlist the services of the A/V Club.
What did you have in mind?
My shame at appearing so low on the Glist has made me reevaluate
my image at this school and beyond.
I've now realized that in today's culture
of bad boy athletes and celebrity sex tapes,
a good reputation is no good at all.
Artie, you know how our Glee Club assignment was
to find a song with a bad reputation and rehabilitate it?
Well, mine is going to afford me
the worst reputation in this school.
Rachel Berry is going to get a little down and dirty.
I'm going to stop you.
You had me at "sex tape."
How can I help?
Hold onto your hat,
because Rachel Berry is going to become
(whispers): musically promiscuous.
because our free-falling reps have reached terminal velocity.
We are at Defcon One.
We're such zeros they didn't even bother
putting us on the Glist.
What does a C-lister do when their tiny star
is about to fall off Perez Hilton's radar screen?
They cause a scandal so extreme
they can no longer be ignored.
Um, excuse me.
Why is she here?
I've been here since first period.
I had a cold, and I took all my antibiotics
at the same time, and now I can't remember how to leave.
But I also don't know why I've only made fourth
on the Glist.
I've made out with, like, everyone in this school.
Girls, boys, Mr. Kidney the janitor.
I need to do
something to get into the top three.
Fine, you're in. In what?
We don't even have a plan.
What is the worst thing a student can do at this school?
Eat in the cafeteria?
(snickering)
No, be a disruption in the library.
And I'm not talking about
trying to check out a reference book.
Mm-mm.
I'm talking about full-on chaos--
including getting your Glee on in the stacks.
Genius.
I never really understood how hard it is to be laughed at.
Particularly in slow motion.
I try to make it seem
like nothing can touch me, but...
Boy...
Jean, I'm so sorry you ever felt that way.
I'm sorry I didn't protect you more.
Remember what we used to do, Sue?
Whenever I got sad,
we'd help at the animal shelter,
to give back.
Because there's always someone who's got it worse than you do.
(bell ringing) I'm a little confused.
I understand.
You're probably wondering, what exactly does Sue Sylvester mean
when she says, "I'm your new therapist"?
Well, let me explain.
As you may or may not know, I star in a little music video
that's been circulating around the Web.
A video that has a tendency to induce
cruel, slow-motion laughter.
No, no, didn't-didn't know about that.
Well, this video
has inspired Sue Sylvester to start giving back.
I happen to have my Masters in counseling,
and when I heard that our school district's
one and only psychologist had committed suicide,
well, I decided to volunteer my services.
And they gave me your name.
I'd really like to help.
I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Ella, you're crippled by mental illness.
Your compulsions have estranged you
from your own feelings.
You nearly married a gym teacher who's more gravy than man.
And you're content to be repeatedly lied to
by the man you purport to love. I'm sorry?
I bribed Will Schuester's landlord
to slip baby monitors under his couch,
and under his bed.
Turns out he's been having make out sessions
with the coach from Vocal Adrenaline,
and sleepovers with that world-class banana magnet
April Rhodes. Oh, my God.
You need to make a bold move.
You suck.
Excuse me?
You take weird little strides when you walk,
as if you were raised in imperial Japan
and someone bound your feet.
You make a valid point.
Grow a pair. I'm insulting you.
You refuse to stand up for yourself,
you're so afraid of confrontation.
You're right.
If you want to get better,
you need to start communicating your feelings.
You need to let Will Schuester know how he's made you feel,
and in a public setting, so he can'escape,
and he won't manipulate you.
Trust me--
you need to let him have it.
RACHEL: Do you know that when we dated, the rest of the school
gave us a nickname?
Puckleberry.
That's humiliating.
The fact is that slumming it with me
actually improved your reputation.
It gave you a sense of humanity.
Wait-- do you want to date again?
I was wondering why you invited me here.
As you know, I'm taken.
But I can be of some assistance.
Help me with my song for Glee Club. I might be
the last chance you have to salvage
what's left of your reputation, and stay in Glee.
Besides, you need a song
that going to help you express your inner pain.
So what song do you want to do for your assignment?
I've chosen David Geddes' fantastically terrible
'70s top ten hit-- "Run Joey Run."
It's a story song.
So we get to play parts.
I'm going to play the role of the tragic heroine
who dies in the end,
Ã¡ la Nicole Kidman in Moulin Rouge.
And you can be the hunky, heroic male lead.
Do I get to kill you?
Actually, my dad shoots me with a shotgun.
(sighs)
Do you think I made that Glist? Honestly.
Well, it does sound like something that you would do.
God, I'm so tired of people judging me
for a few mistakes I've made.
I try to be a good guy.
I go to school and I say, "Be cool, Puck. Be nice."
But by second period, I've got a fire extinguisher in my hands
and I'm spraying some dweeb with it
and I don't know how I got there.
I understand. Yeah.
I sit in Glee Club and I watch
a couple of imperfect performances
and a litany of criticisms just start building up inside of me like a volcano
and I keep telling myself to hold it in
and then it just comes bursting out.
Granted, generally I'm right,
but doesn't do much for my reputation.
It does suck when you do that.
So, uh, how do you think we can get people to see us differently?
I don't know.
I can't-- I can't do this.
You know, whoever made Ã£ that Glist is going to put you at number one
when they find out you cheated on that Jessie kid with me.
Besides, Jessie will never fully understand what it means to be a Jew.
Noah...
I'm ironically turned on by your bad boy image,
but I think we should just keep this professional.
All right, I'm out.
Why should I stay if there's no chance of us making out?
Noah, please come and sit down and let's work on the project.
Okay, it'll help us both.
I promise.
- (bell rings) - I don't think I can do this.
Are you sure this is a good idea?
Stop thinking about him and do it for yourself.
Okay, let's do this.
Nah, can't go in the teacher's lounge.
Lots of cruel, slow-motion laughter going on in there.
Well, look who it is.
I thought I smelled a laughingstock.
Don't start with me Castle, or I will kick you square in the taco.
It's a date.
That's just a typical Saturday night in the Castle condo.
I think it's mornings... Yeah.
Go get 'em.
Some days you...
That's okay.
Excuse me.
Oh, hey, Em, can you just give us a sec?
Actually no.
Will, I can't give you a sec.
You're just going to have to reschedul
your heavy petting session with Mrs. Carlisle for a later time.
Emma!
I beg your pardon?
I was just telling Mr. Schuester
about how my husband recently died.
Wow.
Getting them fresh off the rebound now, aren't you?
Amazing. Nobody's safe. Nobody is safe.
Emma, can I talk to you in private? No, you can't.
Will, we're going to talk about this here and now,
because I have absolutely nothing to hide.
Actually, did you know I was seeing a therapist?
Do you know that? Did you know I've been trying
to work through my OCD so I could be with you?
Will, do you think that's fun for me?
It's not fun; it's absolutely humiliating.
And come to find out you've been fooling around
with some woman named Shelby,
and you slept with April Rhodes.
How did you find out about that?
You're not denying it.
Wow, okay.
See, I thought we were trying to work through this.
I thought when you said you were trying to figure out things
on your own, I thought you meant that.
I'm not going to stand for this anymore.
I'm not. I'm putting my foot down,
and I am finally sticking up for myself.
You're a slut, Will.
You're a slut.
You're a slut, you're a slut, you're a slut.
Everybody should know that.
And you should know that I'm through with you.
I'm very sorry for your loss.
(bell ringing)
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Looks like we got a full house, y'all.
I'm kind of getting cold feet here.
Can you even feel your feet?
Shh!
Team, listen up.
If we pull this off, we will be legends at this school.
We'll rocket up the Glist.
We will be top-five, easy.
Artie, pump up the jam.
It's about to go down.
You can't touch this.
âª My, my, my music hits me so hard âª âª Can't touch this âª
âª Makes me say, oh, my Lord âª
âª Thank you for blessing me âª
âª With a mind to rhyme and two hype feet âª
âª It feels good, when you know you're down âª
âª A super dope homeboy from the Oaktown âª
âª And I'm known as such âª
âª And this is a beat, uh, you can't touch âª
âª I told you, homeboy âª
âª Can't touch this âª
âª Yo, let me bust this funky lyric âª âª Can't touch this âª
âª Fresh new kicks advance, you gotta like that âª
âª Now you know you wanna dance âª
âª So move, outta your seat âª
âª And get a fly girl and catch this beat âª
âª While it's rolling, hold on âª
âª Pump a little bit and let 'em know it's going on âª
âª Like that, like that âª
âª Cold on a mission so fall them back âª
âª Let 'em know that you're too much âª
âª And this is a beat, uh, you can't touch âª
âª Oh, oh, oh, oh âª
âª Yo, I told you, can't touch this âª âª Oh, oh, oh, oh âª
âª You can't touch this âª âª Oh, oh, oh âª
âª Damn, you can't touch this âª âª Oh, oh, oh âª
âª I told you, can't touch this âª âª Oh, oh, oh, oh âª
âª Too high, you can't touch this âª âª Oh, oh, oh âª
âª Yo, we out of here, can't touch this. âª
(gasping)
Here it comes.
That was very cute.
I'm gonna talk to my pastor
and see if I can't get you kids to perform that
for our Sunday service.
, I don't like doing this any more than you do,
but if I don't find out who made that Glist
and stop another one from being published,
the whole Glee Club's going down.
And I can't let that happen.
Look, I know I've been kind of angry lately,
and sometimes I kick over chairs and stuff, but I didn't do it.
All the pieces fit, Finn. You have a very big axe to grind
with several people on that Glist.
Quinn broke your heart, Puck betrayed your friendship,
you're dealing with Kurt's dad dating your mom,
and I happen to know you've had your ups and downs
with Santana and Brittany...
I have nothing against Santana, and I like Brittany.
Quinn's the one who has a beef with them.
Well, there are an awful lot of Cheerios! on that Glist.
Isn't it true that you still feel like
an outcast in that group?
I don't know what you're talking about.
I like being a Cheerio.
And why does everyone just assume I'm angry all the time?
It's called being sassy, Mr. Shue.
It's simple math, Mr. Shue.
The Glists are posted at a height of five and a half feet,
comfortably out of my reach. It could not have been me.
And I have it on good word that...
I saw Puckutting up the Glist in the hallway. I was moving it!
Somebody put it up on Rachel's locker, so I moved it.
I was being a man, doing the right thing.
Puck, at some point, the lies are going to stop,
and you're going to start to sing.
If I did it, why would I put myself at number three?
As far as bad-asses go, I'm number wha.
I'll say it again, I didn't do it!
I don't know how to turn on a computer.
Rachel did it.
Think about it: I stole the guy
she's in love with, then I stole the guy she dated
to get over the guy she's in love with.
And I'm kind of a bitch to her. Just doesn't seem like Rachel.
She's gone behind your back before.
And I mean, who's to say that there's only one culprit?
Look, I know you know something!
So we're not leaving here until I get some answers.
Mr. Schuester, may I be blunt?
(sighs)
Shoot.
Ever since you separated from your wife,
you've spent a lot of late nights
watching reruns of Law and Order, haven't you?
Hmm. Thought so.
And no, I didn't make the Glist.
(sighs)
Right.
(bell ringing)
We're as menacing as Muppet Babies.
Which means our squeaky-clean reputations
are still very much intact.
We have to do what we've been dreading,
something more terrifying than Rachel's personality--
We have to go to Sylvester
and admit that we posted the Physical video.
But we'll get suspended.
And it will be worth it.
Finally the entire student body
will see us as bad-asses.
Dear Journal, I don't know how much longer
I can take the humiliation.
The video has just surpassed three million hits.
Is my misery some kind of karmic retribution
for the way I've treated people?
(phone ringing)
You're go for Sue.
Hello? Sue?
It's Olivia Newton-John, star of Grease--
the most successful movie musical of all time.
Nice try. And that's a ridiculous accent.
Uh...
Journal, I've learned my lesson.
Sue Sylvester's gotta start playing nice full-time.
(phone rings)
Hi! Uh, we must have been cut off.
It's Olivia Newton-John.
I released a record seven-consecutive
number one singles.
Sing something.
âª Let's get physical âª
âª Physical... âª
That song was the best-selling
record of the '80s.
Listen, Sue, I'm headed for a ribbon-cutting ceremony
at a sanctuary for orphaned koalas,
but I heard my daughter Chloe laughing at something
on the Internet the other day,
and I saw your video.
And I just have to ask,
whatever would possess a person
to do something like that?
Well, I gotta tell you, Olivia,
that video was never meant for public consumption.
Some people enjoy videotaping themselves
being intimate with a partner.
I happen to enjoy revisiting the impeccable form
of my various jazzercise routines.
Well, it got me thinking.
You know, that song was the biggest hit of my career.
"Physical" spent ten weeks at number one.
It's a classic.
I agree.
Unfortunately, I botched the video, which,
by the way, was one of the first music videos ever.
But I filled it with obese guys in spandex,
and it went over the top, and the song went with it.
But I saw your YouTube video, Sue,
and I realized that now is the time
to save it-- and possibly you.
I'll be in Ohio tomorrow chairing
a benefit for Save the Rainforests at King's Island.
I don't understand.
(bell ringing)
Hey, man-whore.
Will Schuester? Yeah.
I'm Brenda Castle.
I'm the new astronomy teacher and badminton coach.
I also happen to be an alcoholic,
and... I like pills.
I hear that's just your type.
Let's go in this classroom and pork!
No.
I am praying for you, William.
We've all heard about your gallivanting!
But nothing happened!
Maybe that's not what matters, Will.
You broke the heart of somebody
who doesn't let people get close to her.
I didn't mean to hurt anybody.
You probably didn't mean to hurt me, either,
but lately I've been feeding my feelings to the tune
of 6,000 calories a day.
(sighs)
Slut.
Remember-- if Sylvester hits you in the fbce
after you cop to posting the video,
don't scream like a woman.
You're so brave for doing this, Kurt.
I know. Thank you.
Oh, my God...
Coach Sylvester, can I have just a minute of your time?
What do you want, ladyface?
You're aware a tape was leaked
onto the Internet, causing you to become
a national laughingstock?
We stole the tape from your syringe-and-pill drawer.
We posted it online.
We'll accept whatever punishment you see fit.
So it was you.
I can't thank you enough.
ARTIE: She wasn't angry at all.
It was weird.
Maybe the comments online have gotten
so mean, people have started to feel sorry for her.
She's finally getting some sympathy,
so she's in a forgiving mood.
Wait a second.
Take a look at this.
(typing)
(synthesizer playing pop song intro)
Isn't that...?
âª Physical, physical, physical, physical, physical âª
âª I'm saying all the things that I know you'll like âª
âª Making good conversation âª
âª I gotta handle you just right âª
âª You know what I mean? âª
âª I took you to an intimate restaurant âª
âª Then to a suggestive movie âª
âª There's nothing left to talk about âª
âª Unless it's horizontally âª
âª Let's get physical, physical! âª
âª I wanna get physical! âª
âª Let's get into physical! âª
âª Let me hear your body talk, your body talk âª
âª Let me hear your body talk âª âª Body talk âª
âª Let's get physical, physical! âª
âª I want to get physical! âª
âª Let's get into physical âª
âª Let me hear your body talk, your body talk âª
âª Let me hear your body talk âª
âª Bah-bah-bah-body talk âª
âª I been patient, I been good âª
âª Trying to keep my hands on the table âª
âª It's getting hard, this holding back âª
âª You know what I mean? âª âª What I mean? âª
âª I'm sure you'll understand my point of view âª
âª We know each other mentally âª
âª You've gotta know that you're bringin' out the animal in me! âª
âª Let's get physical, physical! âª
âª I want to get physical! âª
âª Let's get into physical! âª
âª Let me hear your body talk âª
âª Your body talk âª
âª Let me hear your body talk âª âª Bah-bah-bah-body talk âª
âª Bah-bah-bah-body talk, bah-bah-body talk âª
âª Bah-bah-bah-bah body talk âª
âª Let me hear your body talk âª
âª Your body talk âª
âª Let me hear your body talk âª
âª Let's get physical. âª
(song ends)
MERCEDES: Whew!
Yeah. Again, again, again, again, Again, again, again, again!
Yeah. I need to learn to do this verse.
All day. All righty.
(bell ringing)
WILL: All right, guys, listen up.
Another week has almost passed.
If a list goes up again later today,
this issue is out of my hands,
and it becomes Principal Figgins' jurisdiction.
Seriously, Mr. Shue, whoever made that list
is not gonna come forward.
We might as well just bend over
and take whatever's coming.
Fine.
Okay.
Well, then, uh, let's get to it.
Rachel, how about you show us your bad reputation project?
I'd like to say a few words first.
Though I understand that a motion picture
should stand on its own,
I do realize that some of you are not well-versed
in the complex vocabulary of the filmic arts.
I expect that this video will go over some of the heads
of our less-cultured teammates.
So let me just say I hope you enjoy
my "Bad Reputation."
Lights. Okay, go.
(angelic harmonizing)
(rock ballad plays)
âª Ooh, Daddy, please don't âª
âª It wasn't his fault âª
âª He means so much to me! âª
âª Daddy, please don't, we're gonna get married âª
âª Just you wait and see âª
âª Every night the same old dream âª
âª I hate to close my eyes âª
âª I can't erase the memory âª
âª The sound of Julie's cry âª
âª She called me up late that night âª
âª And she said, "Joe, don't come over âª
âª "My dad and I just had a fight âª
âª "And he stormed out the door! âª
âª "I've never seen him act this way âª
âª "My God, he's going crazy! âª
âª "He said he's gonna make you pay âª
âª "For what we've done âª
âª He's got a gun, so run, Joey!" âª
âª Joey, run! âª
âª Daddy, please don't âª
âª It wasn't his fault, he means so much to me âª
âª Daddy, please don't âª
âª We're gonna get married âª
âª Just you wait and see âª
JESSIE: âª Got in my car and drove like mad âª
âª Till I reached Julie's place âª
âª She ran to me, with tear-filled eyes âª
âª And bruises on her face âª
âª All at once, I saw him there âª
âª Sneaking up behind me âª
âª Watch out! âª
âª Then Julie yelled, "He's got a gun!" âª
âª And she stepped in front of me âª
âª Then, suddenly, a shot rang out âª
âª And I saw Julie falling âª
âª I ran to her, I held her close âª
âª When I looked down, my hands were red âª
âª And here's the last words âª
âª Julie said... âª
âª Daddy, please don't, it wasn't his fault âª
âª He means so much to me âª
âª Daddy, please don't âª
âª We're gonna get married... âª
(angelic chorus vocalizing)
âª Run, Joey, run, Joey, run âª
âª Joey, run, Joey, run âª
âª Joey, run, Joey, run! âª
(song ends)
Well, why don't we just, um, take a moment
to really absorb what we've just watched.
This is garbage! Finn!
No, he's right. First of all, I need to trust
my instincts more because I had a feeling
when we were shooting that, that it was not going to be good.
Why didn't you tell me they were in this, too?
I thought you and I were going out.
Being triple-cast with two other guys
to play opposite your girlfriend?
It's mortifying.
It was an artistic statement.
FINN: No. it wasn't! It was you
trying to look like
you had a bunch of guys fighting over you
so you could stop looking like some kind
of outcast and be seen
as some hot slutty girl singer!
How could you do this to me;
to all us guys?
Is your stupid reputation more important
than your relationships?
Jessie, wait!
JEAN: I saw your video, Sue! You were fabulous!
You know, I have
to thank you, Jean.
You always know exactly what to say to me
when I lose my way.
Turns out all I needed was an attitude change.
I forgot how good it feels to give back.
I've spent so much time worrying
about what other people thought about me,
when there's really only one person in the world
I want to impress.
Who?
Who? You, silly.
So, yesterday, I walked
back into that teachers' lounge,
and I calmly informed them of my unlikely skyrocket
to showbiz fame, and very gently
told them all I just didn't care what they thought about me.
What's that? Oh, look.
Sue Sylvester is a top 700 recording artist, people!
Who's laughing now, huh?
Now, since Olivia is giving
her cut of the proceeds to injured manatees,
I've decided to give
all of my profits to this nursing home.
It's not going to be much.
Olivia totally screwed me in negotiations.
I won't be working
with her again, but it should be enough
for a couple of benches out back for the summer.
Maybe a little vegetable garden for you to putter ound in.
That'd be nice.
Yeah.
Now, after all these years, how is it
that you still know so much more about everything than I do?
I'm the smart one.
(chuckles)
You got the looks, too.
How is that fair?
Ah, thank you.
(laughs) Let's say we crack open a book, huh?
Okay.
See that-- the two little bears?
That's you and I. That's right.
I'm the big one, right? And I'm the small one.
Yeah, you're the tiny one.
And what does that say?
"I always love you."
"And I will always love you."
(bell ringing)
(knocks gently) Hey.
Uh, these are for you.
They're lovely.
Thank you.
(clears throat)
Um... I-I messed up, Emma.
I think, in all of this
(inhales deeply) "discovering who I am" business,
I took a couple of wrong turns.
And I get how those detours
might have hurt you.
But now I know that that's not who I am
or who I want to be.
I know what's supposed to happen now.
I'm supposed to smile
and be impressed by how in touch you are with your feelings
and moon over the fact that you care about me so much,
but, um...
I can't.
But, Emily, th-this is... this is killing me.
I just...
(sighs)
I want you to look at me the way you used to.
I can't. (clears throat)
But you know what, that's a good thing.
Really, if this relationship is ever going to work
between the two of us, we have to start
seeing each other for who we really are.
Thank you for the flowers.
I know you're behind the Glist.
You have no proof. I can't believe
that you're going to pin this on me. I'll be expelled.
I mean, it makes sense.
Everything else has been taken from me--
my popularity, my body.
Might as well throw away my education.
You know when I realized that you did it?
The moment I felt what it was like
to walk in your shoes.
I mean, it takes years to build a good reputation,
but only seconds to destroy it.
Couple bad choices, and you go from the top
to the bottom.
You have lost so much, Quinn.
Which means you had the most to gain from the Glist.
I never meant to hurt anybody.
I... I was captain of the cheerleading squad,
president of the Celibacy Club.
I had Finn.
People would part like the Red Sea when I walked
down the hallway.
Now I'm invisible.
And you think being seen as a cheap tramp is better?
A bad reputation is better than no reputation at all.
Look, I know that high school feels
like your whole life right now,
but it's going to end.
You're going to give that baby to a family
who really wants it, who's going to love it,
and then you are going to go on to do amazing things, Quinn.
You really think that I can get it all back one day?
(sighs)
No.
I think you can get something even better.
I mean, come on. You're Quinn Fabray, right?
I mean, those people didn't part
when you walked down the halls;
you moved them with your attitude.
Thanks, Mr. Shue.
You're a really good teacher--
even if everybody is calling you a man-whore.
FIGGINS: You wanted to see me, William?
I trust you have come up
with the perpetrators of the Glist.
I, um... I grilled
every single one of my students,
and, uh... no one.
No one copped to making the Glist.
They all closed ranks and wouldn't rat out who did it.
That's poppycock, Will.
I will not let this school be held hostage
by juvenile shenanigans.
I know, but... I mean, your point has been made.
The Glists have stopped.
I think we should just
call this a victory and move on.
Fine.
I'm still praying for you, Will.
Thank you.
(bell ringing)
Hi.
Are you still mad at me?
You know, before I transferred here
to make you my girlfriend, I asked around about you,
found out your rep, what kind of girl you were.
What did they say? Most of them
had no idea who you were.
The ones that did said you
were kind of sneaky hot, but that that quality
was canceled out by a compulsive need to be right
and a strange affinity
for sweaters with animals on them.
The most interesting part was...
that, even though no one particularly liked you,
they all said you were a person who could be trusted.
I still am.
I have this pathological need to be popular, okay?
I... I just want people to think I'm cool so bad sometimes
that it just clouds my judgment. Okay?
As a fellow star in the making, I'm...
I'm sure you can understand that.
On that level, sure.
But as the guy who gave up everything
to be your one and only, I just can't see past this.
I should have been enough for you, Rachel.
I knew you'd break my heart.
Well, that's the funny thing about reputations.
Everyone thinks I'm the big heartbreaker,
but the fact of the matter is...
you broke mine first.
Do me a favor.
If we end up next to each other
on the bar at Ballet Club this week,
just do your arabesques and piquÃ©s in silence.
Don't talk to me.
("Total Eclipse of the Heart" plays)
âª Turn around âª
âª Every now and then, I get a little bit lonely âª
âª And you're never comin' round âª
âª Turn around âª
âª Every now and then, I get a little bit tired âª
âª Of listening to the sound of my tears âª
âª Turn around âª
âª Every now and then, I get a little bit terrified âª
âª And then I see the look in your eyes âª
âª Turn around, bright eyes âª
âª Every now and then, I fall apart âª
âª And I need you now tonight âª
âª And I need you more than ever âª
âª And if you'll only hold me tight âª
âª We'll be holding on forever âª
âª And we'll only be making it right âª
âª 'Cause we'll never be wrong âª
âª Together we can take it to the end of the line âª
âª Your love is like a shadow on me âª
âª All of the time âª âª All of the time âª
âª I don't know what to do, I'm always in the dark âª
âª You're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks âª
âª I really need you tonight âª
âª Forever's going to start tonight âª
âª Once upon a time there was light in my life âª
âª Now I'm only falling apart âª
âª There's nothing I can say âª
âª Total eclipse of the heart âª
âª Turn around, bright eyes âª
âª Every now and then, I fall apart âª
âª Turn around, bright eyes âª
âª Every now and then, I fall apart âª
âª And I need you now tonight âª
âª And I need you more than ever âª
âª And we'll only be making it right âª
âª 'Cause we'll never be wrong âª
âª Together we can take it to the end of the line âª
âª Your love is like a shadow on me âª
âª All of the time âª âª All of the time âª
âª I don't know what to do, I'm always in the dark âª
âª You're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks âª
âª I really need you tonight âª
âª Forever's going to start tonight âª
âª Once upon a time, I was falling in love âª
âª Now I'm only falling apart âª
âª There's nothing I can do âª
âª Total eclipse of the heart âª
âª Turn around, bright eyes. âª
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