1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,000 Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen. www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:03,269 --> 00:00:06,005 All right, listen up. 3 00:00:06,007 --> 00:00:07,673 I just heard from the Hong Kong office 4 00:00:07,675 --> 00:00:10,209 and we have a big opportunity in the Asian market. 5 00:00:10,211 --> 00:00:14,179 I know we just finished off a huge Chinese deal an hour ago, 6 00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:17,216 but I'm already hungry for more. 7 00:00:18,485 --> 00:00:19,651 That's a joke. 8 00:00:19,653 --> 00:00:22,688 Okay. It's okay. 9 00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:24,990 That was a good one, sir. I love your jokes. 10 00:00:24,992 --> 00:00:26,158 Really? 11 00:00:26,160 --> 00:00:27,693 Which, uh, which one of my jokes 12 00:00:27,695 --> 00:00:29,228 would you say is your favorite? 13 00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:31,196 Okay, uh... 14 00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:32,965 Oh, uh, oh, uh, I-I like the one 15 00:00:32,967 --> 00:00:35,467 where you tell us that we have the weekend off... 16 00:00:35,469 --> 00:00:37,536 Oh! ...And then, uh, and then we all make plans. 17 00:00:37,538 --> 00:00:39,071 And then you call us on Saturday 18 00:00:39,073 --> 00:00:41,173 and you're like, "you got to come in to work!" 19 00:00:43,244 --> 00:00:46,345 Especially because Richardson missed his wedding. 20 00:00:46,347 --> 00:00:48,313 Richardson, tell everybody... 21 00:00:48,315 --> 00:00:50,416 Wh-why am I not seeing Richardson? 22 00:00:50,418 --> 00:00:52,384 Jackson, where the hell is Richar... 23 00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:55,487 Where the hell is Jackson?! 24 00:00:55,489 --> 00:00:57,156 Forgive me, sir. 25 00:00:57,158 --> 00:00:59,358 But, uh, I've noticed you tend to be extremely hard 26 00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:01,427 on the bearer of bad news, so please bear in mind 27 00:01:01,429 --> 00:01:03,062 that I am just the messenger here. 28 00:01:03,064 --> 00:01:05,831 Spit it out. 29 00:01:05,833 --> 00:01:09,201 Jasper McCabe has been calling everybody, trying to poach them. 30 00:01:09,203 --> 00:01:13,405 Jasper McCabe, that punk money manager, is poaching my people? 31 00:01:13,407 --> 00:01:14,973 That is outrageous! 32 00:01:15,842 --> 00:01:20,179 Did everybody get a call? Because I did not. 33 00:01:20,181 --> 00:01:24,216 If it's a war this guy wants, it's a war he's going to get. 34 00:01:24,218 --> 00:01:26,885 But he's gonna have to do one hell of a lot better 35 00:01:26,887 --> 00:01:28,754 than poaching my worst people. 36 00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:30,789 I mean, you know, Thompson, Sacks, 37 00:01:30,791 --> 00:01:33,092 and that dead weight McCormick? 38 00:01:33,094 --> 00:01:34,893 I'm still here, sir. 39 00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:37,129 Oh. Okay. 40 00:01:37,131 --> 00:01:39,731 Well, keep doing a great job there, McCormick. 41 00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:43,268 Eric, give me the... where the hell is Eric? 42 00:01:44,304 --> 00:01:46,605 All right, everybody, you can have the weekend off. 43 00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:49,208 - Yay! - That was a joke. 44 00:01:49,210 --> 00:01:50,542 Ah. 45 00:01:56,316 --> 00:01:57,816 Yeah, yeah, man. Recycle a doughnut. 46 00:01:57,818 --> 00:02:00,752 That's great. You must feel good about yourself. 47 00:02:00,754 --> 00:02:02,321 You're doing a good job, handsome. 48 00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:05,390 Thank you. You just call me handsome? 49 00:02:05,392 --> 00:02:07,960 Hey, you know what I like to do when I need to lift my spirits? 50 00:02:07,962 --> 00:02:09,595 I like to sing about what's going on. 51 00:02:09,597 --> 00:02:11,430 You know, give myself a little theme song. 52 00:02:11,432 --> 00:02:12,664 Ah. Example. 53 00:02:20,441 --> 00:02:23,442 You're Jasper McCabe, the prophet of palo alto. 54 00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:35,621 Yeah, well, I just want to let you know, 55 00:02:35,623 --> 00:02:37,489 I'm... I'm more than just a garbage man. 56 00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:38,757 That's right. 57 00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:40,826 You got to reach for the stars. 58 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,461 Here you go, good-looking. 59 00:02:42,463 --> 00:02:44,163 You're a beautiful man. 60 00:02:44,165 --> 00:02:45,430 Boop! 61 00:02:45,432 --> 00:02:47,633 Uh, no, man, you don't understand. 62 00:02:47,635 --> 00:02:49,768 I'm not like a... $100? 63 00:02:49,770 --> 00:02:52,204 Jesus. 64 00:02:59,045 --> 00:03:02,114 Guys, you'll never guess who I just ran into in the lobby. 65 00:03:02,116 --> 00:03:04,149 Jasper McCabe. 66 00:03:04,151 --> 00:03:06,018 "Oh, my God, Brody, tell me more." 67 00:03:06,020 --> 00:03:07,719 Okay. 68 00:03:07,721 --> 00:03:10,189 Well, he gave me 100 bucks, and he called me handsome. 69 00:03:11,457 --> 00:03:13,158 "Oh, that's awesome. 70 00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,394 You should feel really good about yourself, Brody." 71 00:03:15,396 --> 00:03:18,130 Honey, we don't have time for side voice right now, okay? 72 00:03:18,132 --> 00:03:20,232 Four people just disappeared from upstairs. 73 00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:22,868 Richardson, Thompson, Martinez, Jackson... 74 00:03:22,870 --> 00:03:25,470 All good men who left behind their stuff. 75 00:03:25,472 --> 00:03:27,439 Or, as I now call it, our stuff. 76 00:03:29,008 --> 00:03:30,342 Derrick, you know what? 77 00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:32,010 Just have, like, a little compassion 78 00:03:32,012 --> 00:03:34,213 for these people that just... oh, earbuds! 79 00:03:34,215 --> 00:03:36,982 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 80 00:03:36,984 --> 00:03:38,517 These guys were all in my group. 81 00:03:38,519 --> 00:03:40,219 At first they called us the three musketeers, 82 00:03:40,221 --> 00:03:42,087 but then they brought in Martinez and Jackson, 83 00:03:42,089 --> 00:03:43,922 so they called us the Jackson five, 84 00:03:43,924 --> 00:03:45,691 which I really never got because I did all the work. 85 00:03:45,693 --> 00:03:49,661 I suggested the Brody bunch, but that never caught on. 86 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:52,030 Anyway, do you guys realize what's happening here? 87 00:03:52,032 --> 00:03:53,465 It's the douche rapture. 88 00:03:54,934 --> 00:03:58,570 Scripture tells us of a day when pretentious a-holes 89 00:03:58,572 --> 00:04:03,442 will descend directly into hell, burning for eternity, 90 00:04:03,444 --> 00:04:06,178 which turns out is a very long time. 91 00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:10,382 Anyway, enjoy your trip. 92 00:04:10,384 --> 00:04:12,417 No, actually. 93 00:04:12,419 --> 00:04:14,920 Jasper McCabe poached these guys. 94 00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:17,856 Which means there's gonna be some openings upstairs, 95 00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:22,527 which means Mansfield is gonna need this guy. 96 00:04:23,529 --> 00:04:24,763 Good luck! 97 00:04:24,765 --> 00:04:27,299 "Never come back." 98 00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:33,739 Hey. So, Jasper McCabe's poaching, huh? 99 00:04:33,741 --> 00:04:35,540 Yeah. He took the Jackson four. 100 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:37,109 What? They kept it with Jackson? 101 00:04:37,111 --> 00:04:38,944 Did the name Brody bunch even come up? 102 00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:42,147 All I know is that everybody up here's getting the call. 103 00:04:42,149 --> 00:04:44,283 Really? Everybody? Not me. 104 00:04:44,984 --> 00:04:46,251 Yet. 105 00:04:46,253 --> 00:04:47,552 He's obviously going alphabetically 106 00:04:47,554 --> 00:04:49,821 and he hasn't gotten to the w's yet. 107 00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:51,390 Well, Zimmerman's gone. 108 00:04:52,725 --> 00:04:55,794 He might also have a thing against asians. 109 00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:57,729 Has anyone seen Chang? 110 00:04:57,731 --> 00:05:00,265 Damn. 111 00:05:00,267 --> 00:05:01,767 All right, listen up. 112 00:05:01,769 --> 00:05:03,435 This is usually the point in a war 113 00:05:03,437 --> 00:05:06,071 where the general says, "troops, we've lost some good men." 114 00:05:06,073 --> 00:05:07,739 But that's not the case. 115 00:05:07,741 --> 00:05:10,676 We've only lost weak men like Zimmerman, Chang, 116 00:05:10,678 --> 00:05:12,778 and that dead weight McCormick. 117 00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:14,179 I'm still here, sir. 118 00:05:14,181 --> 00:05:17,449 Fod God's sake, stay in my eye line! 119 00:05:17,451 --> 00:05:19,151 All right, everybody into the war room. 120 00:05:19,153 --> 00:05:21,853 Ooh, I love when his office turns into the war room. 121 00:05:21,855 --> 00:05:25,157 Up, up! Soldiers only. 122 00:05:25,159 --> 00:05:27,459 Hey. 123 00:05:27,461 --> 00:05:30,295 I'm a soldier. 124 00:05:30,297 --> 00:05:32,264 "Damn right, you are." 125 00:05:32,266 --> 00:05:33,832 Thanks, man. 126 00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:40,505 I'll have a double mocha. 127 00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:43,141 And I'd like to apologize in advance for my friend. 128 00:05:43,143 --> 00:05:44,876 Yes. 129 00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:47,179 And I'll have hot water poured into this cup 130 00:05:47,181 --> 00:05:49,481 that I brought from my home because I refuse 131 00:05:49,483 --> 00:05:52,017 to prop up the coffee industrial complex. 132 00:05:53,486 --> 00:05:55,887 I will also be taking many of these stirrers. 133 00:05:55,889 --> 00:05:59,057 Some I will use now and others I will use later for crafts. 134 00:06:00,793 --> 00:06:03,228 You really let that barista have it. 135 00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:05,397 Well, they pour water over flavored dirt 136 00:06:05,399 --> 00:06:07,666 and they expect me to stand up and salute? 137 00:06:07,668 --> 00:06:09,735 No, thank you. 138 00:06:09,737 --> 00:06:11,870 I've seen you around a lot. 139 00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:13,205 I walk around a lot. 140 00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:18,744 Bye. 141 00:06:20,913 --> 00:06:22,514 God, what was I thinking? 142 00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,416 That guy is so out of my league. 143 00:06:24,418 --> 00:06:25,584 Who? Derrick? 144 00:06:25,586 --> 00:06:27,152 No. With the beard. 145 00:06:27,154 --> 00:06:30,222 This homeless guy over by the news stand? 146 00:06:30,224 --> 00:06:33,658 No, the guy pouring half and half into his thermos. 147 00:06:49,942 --> 00:06:51,276 Harvard? 148 00:06:52,378 --> 00:06:54,546 Okay. Great. Really? 149 00:06:54,548 --> 00:06:56,047 He seems so awesome. 150 00:06:56,049 --> 00:06:59,084 I bet he's awesome. Is he awesome? 151 00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:01,019 He... 152 00:07:05,224 --> 00:07:09,261 You know, in his own very specific way, 153 00:07:09,263 --> 00:07:11,363 he is really awesome. 154 00:07:11,365 --> 00:07:12,931 He's... he's smart. 155 00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:14,366 And he's funny. 156 00:07:14,368 --> 00:07:16,101 Uh, he's a little weird. 157 00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:17,569 My college boyfriend 158 00:07:17,571 --> 00:07:19,471 was one of those "Harry Potter" super fans 159 00:07:19,473 --> 00:07:20,806 who spoke Parseltongue 160 00:07:20,808 --> 00:07:22,974 and played Quidditch every weekend, 161 00:07:22,976 --> 00:07:25,777 so I could do with a little weird for a change. 162 00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:28,413 Okay, well, you should let me set you up with Harvard. 163 00:07:28,415 --> 00:07:30,582 - You'd do that for me? - That's what friends do. 164 00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:32,150 And, plus, I'm great at it. 165 00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:34,519 I set up my best friend with her last seven boyfriends. 166 00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,657 Okay, real talk. She's gonna die alone. 167 00:07:38,659 --> 00:07:40,292 But you are gonna be easy. 168 00:07:46,566 --> 00:07:48,767 I cannot figure out 169 00:07:48,769 --> 00:07:52,103 how he's stealing my men right from under my nose. 170 00:07:52,105 --> 00:07:53,605 Oh, actually, sir, this soldier 171 00:07:53,607 --> 00:07:55,607 did a little recon for you on Jasper McCabe. 172 00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:57,742 Turns out he's in our lobby. 173 00:07:57,744 --> 00:07:59,110 - So what I thought we should do... - In my lobby? 174 00:07:59,112 --> 00:08:00,445 Yeah. Make a hole. 175 00:08:00,447 --> 00:08:02,681 Today's not the day to mess with me. 176 00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:04,516 Ooh, close, close, close, close, close. 177 00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:10,856 Ah, didn't see you there, sir. 178 00:08:10,858 --> 00:08:13,658 Mr. Wen, when you buy a skyscraper, 179 00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:16,228 always spring for the elevator remote. 180 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:22,467 Jasper McCabe. 181 00:08:22,469 --> 00:08:23,869 Remington Mansfield. 182 00:08:23,871 --> 00:08:26,037 So great to finally meet you. 183 00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:28,039 What are we doing? We shaking? We hugging? 184 00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:31,142 I judge a man by his handshake. 185 00:08:31,144 --> 00:08:32,711 Yeah, yeah. 186 00:08:32,713 --> 00:08:36,047 Like a bag of lukewarm hot dogs. 187 00:08:36,049 --> 00:08:39,885 You got some nerve coming in my building. 188 00:08:39,887 --> 00:08:41,353 Well, you know what? 189 00:08:41,355 --> 00:08:43,054 Speaking of your building, you think you could 190 00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:44,656 hook a brother up with the wi-fi password? 191 00:08:44,658 --> 00:08:46,157 'Cause the cell service here is redonk. 192 00:08:46,159 --> 00:08:47,626 Yeah. 193 00:08:47,628 --> 00:08:51,596 The password is "go f yourself," all caps. 194 00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:56,034 Now get the hell off my property. 195 00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:58,136 Your property actually starts at that elevator. 196 00:08:58,138 --> 00:09:00,171 And, you see, the lobby is actually designated 197 00:09:00,173 --> 00:09:02,541 a public space per the San Francisco zoning code. 198 00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:04,843 Did I mention that I minored in urban planning? 199 00:09:04,845 --> 00:09:06,978 I also happen to play the French horn. 200 00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:08,914 Oh, my God. He's a renaissance man. 201 00:09:08,916 --> 00:09:11,049 Terrific because I'm gonna go ahead 202 00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:14,219 and play you a song on my I'm-gonna-kick-your-ass-aphone. 203 00:09:14,221 --> 00:09:15,587 Ooh. Whoa, whoa. 204 00:09:15,589 --> 00:09:17,422 Let me... let me handle this, sir. 205 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,226 Do you know who I am? 206 00:09:22,428 --> 00:09:25,564 Do you have any idea who I am? 207 00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:28,500 Because I didn't get a call. 208 00:09:29,835 --> 00:09:32,070 McCabe, let me... let me make this very clear. 209 00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:34,906 Men with much stronger handshakes than you 210 00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:38,043 have been trying to take me down since the '80s. 211 00:09:38,045 --> 00:09:40,178 Well, I wouldn't know. I was born in 1990. 212 00:09:40,180 --> 00:09:43,081 Wait. So, you... you're, what, 15? 213 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:45,083 No. You're 25. 214 00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:48,053 Holy shit. That went by fast. 215 00:09:48,055 --> 00:09:50,221 My... my point is, 216 00:09:50,223 --> 00:09:52,924 I've destroyed hundreds of guys like you. 217 00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:55,193 No, you've destroyed hundreds of guys like you. 218 00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:56,895 You see, the business is changing. 219 00:09:56,897 --> 00:09:58,129 And you're not. 220 00:09:58,131 --> 00:09:59,698 You're damn right I'm not. 221 00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:02,100 I did not mean that as a compliment. 222 00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:04,202 It's too late. 223 00:10:04,204 --> 00:10:06,471 I feel great about myself. 224 00:10:06,473 --> 00:10:09,708 Ah, there's my 1:00 right there. 225 00:10:09,710 --> 00:10:11,943 McCormick. 226 00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:14,713 Now I see you! 227 00:10:14,715 --> 00:10:17,649 You have poked the bear. 228 00:10:17,651 --> 00:10:19,684 And you, come here. 229 00:10:21,787 --> 00:10:23,922 You're in for the longest elevator ride 230 00:10:23,924 --> 00:10:26,124 of your young life. 231 00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:32,964 Well, hey, hey, hey. 232 00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:35,800 Look who got a promotion. 233 00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:38,136 See? Keep reaching for the stars, good-looking. 234 00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:40,138 For the record, I have an MBA from Harvard. 235 00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:42,273 You know what? Here's another hundy. 236 00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:44,776 Okay, I don't need... all right, I'll take that. 237 00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:46,011 But, look. 238 00:10:46,013 --> 00:10:47,345 I used to work upstairs. 239 00:10:47,347 --> 00:10:49,314 I was Mansfield's top money manager. 240 00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:50,582 My name's Brody Moyer. 241 00:10:50,584 --> 00:10:52,083 - Brody Moyer? - Yeah. 242 00:10:52,085 --> 00:10:53,451 Well, you're a stud. 243 00:10:53,453 --> 00:10:54,653 You were at the top of my list. 244 00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:56,287 No one knew where you went. 245 00:10:56,289 --> 00:10:58,323 I was supposed to go to Hong Kong with Mansfield. 246 00:10:58,325 --> 00:11:00,291 Instead, I went to Paris with my girlfriend. 247 00:11:00,293 --> 00:11:03,495 Join Jackson, Thompson, Richardson, Martinez. 248 00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:06,531 The Jackson five. I was thinking more like the Brody bunch. 249 00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:11,736 It's like you live in my heart. 250 00:11:13,139 --> 00:11:14,639 Look, uh, I-I'm tempted, 251 00:11:14,641 --> 00:11:16,608 but I... I got a good thing going. 252 00:11:16,610 --> 00:11:18,843 What are you, plunging money out of those toilets? 253 00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:20,612 Look, I have a history with Mansfield. 254 00:11:20,614 --> 00:11:22,447 He's kind of like a father figure to me. 255 00:11:22,449 --> 00:11:24,482 But Mansfield's days are over. 256 00:11:24,484 --> 00:11:26,484 He's a dinosaur. I'm a meteor. 257 00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:28,820 He's classified ads. I'm Craigslist. 258 00:11:28,822 --> 00:11:31,623 - He's the radio star. I'm video. - Yeah, I get it. 259 00:11:31,625 --> 00:11:34,059 You're the things that kill other things. 260 00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:38,329 I-I-I still am gonna have to pass. 261 00:11:38,331 --> 00:11:40,865 Hey, just... just one quick question before you go. 262 00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:42,400 What is the wi-fi password? 263 00:11:42,402 --> 00:11:45,070 Oh, it's "go f yourself," all caps. 264 00:11:49,408 --> 00:11:51,576 I'm not sure I'm ready for this. 265 00:11:51,578 --> 00:11:53,378 Hey, be confident, okay? 266 00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:56,147 You are smart, you are cute, you are rocking those bangs. 267 00:11:56,149 --> 00:11:57,482 You're right. 268 00:11:57,484 --> 00:11:58,850 I can do this. 269 00:11:58,852 --> 00:12:00,218 I cannot do this. 270 00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:02,220 Okay, okay, okay, okay. 271 00:12:02,222 --> 00:12:04,989 You do not have to do anything you are not ready to do. 272 00:12:04,991 --> 00:12:06,224 Harvard! 273 00:12:06,226 --> 00:12:08,727 No! 274 00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:11,062 Hey, you. So, we meet again. 275 00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:13,331 I've never seen you before in my entire life. 276 00:12:13,333 --> 00:12:15,233 Okay. 277 00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,502 Uh, can you look at my keyboard? 278 00:12:17,504 --> 00:12:18,737 It's not working. All right. 279 00:12:18,739 --> 00:12:20,705 Let's just see what... oh. 280 00:12:23,009 --> 00:12:25,210 It looks like someone spilled a soda in it. 281 00:12:25,212 --> 00:12:28,413 Two, actually. One didn't do anything. 282 00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:32,784 This is gonna take a lot of work. 283 00:12:32,786 --> 00:12:34,385 And now it's broken. 284 00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:37,055 So it's literally out of my hands. 285 00:12:37,057 --> 00:12:38,857 That's my exact sense of humor. 286 00:12:41,527 --> 00:12:43,962 I like your beard. Thank you. 287 00:12:43,964 --> 00:12:46,464 It keeps my face warm. 288 00:12:46,466 --> 00:12:49,134 Uh, can I ask you a question? 289 00:12:49,136 --> 00:12:52,570 Mm-hmm. Does it tickle when you kiss? 290 00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:54,873 I guess there's only one way to find out, isn't there? 291 00:13:00,413 --> 00:13:02,914 Yeah. Yeah. You know what? 292 00:13:02,916 --> 00:13:04,716 It actually does a little bit, yeah. 293 00:13:04,718 --> 00:13:06,551 Okay. 294 00:13:06,553 --> 00:13:08,486 Well, I guess I'll leave you to it. 295 00:13:08,488 --> 00:13:10,388 Unless you want me to hang around. 296 00:13:10,390 --> 00:13:13,491 No. 297 00:13:13,493 --> 00:13:15,660 Okay, good. 298 00:13:15,662 --> 00:13:17,061 What the hell is wrong with you, man? 299 00:13:17,063 --> 00:13:18,463 She was hitting on you. 300 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:21,599 Well, I did not get that impression at all. 301 00:13:21,601 --> 00:13:23,768 Besides, she's not my type. 302 00:13:23,770 --> 00:13:25,737 Dude, she's totally your type. 303 00:13:25,739 --> 00:13:27,972 She's a woman, and she's not a dude. 304 00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:30,608 Well, I'm spoken for. 305 00:13:30,610 --> 00:13:32,076 Oh, my God! 306 00:13:32,078 --> 00:13:34,179 Dude, you're not in a relationship with Jenny. 307 00:13:34,181 --> 00:13:36,514 Well, maybe not this moment. 308 00:13:36,516 --> 00:13:38,850 Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. 309 00:13:38,852 --> 00:13:41,319 But you know what? Probably tomorrow. 310 00:13:42,521 --> 00:13:44,289 And when she finally comes around, 311 00:13:44,291 --> 00:13:45,790 I'll tell you what. 312 00:13:45,792 --> 00:13:47,425 She's gonna be getting a little bit of this. 313 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:52,964 It really does tickle. It does. 314 00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:55,166 I'm telling you, Jenny, Harvard is not gonna move on. 315 00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:56,701 You got to break up with him. 316 00:13:56,703 --> 00:13:59,204 Yeah, that makes sense. Um, except for one thing. 317 00:13:59,206 --> 00:14:01,372 I'm not dating him! 318 00:14:01,374 --> 00:14:04,776 I know that. You know that. He does not know that. 319 00:14:04,778 --> 00:14:06,144 You should have seen 320 00:14:06,146 --> 00:14:08,313 how he was making out with his hand in there. 321 00:14:08,315 --> 00:14:10,381 Oh, my God. Derrick, I can't. 322 00:14:10,383 --> 00:14:12,150 I can't. I've never broken up with anybody. 323 00:14:12,152 --> 00:14:13,952 Come on. No, I'm serious. 324 00:14:13,954 --> 00:14:15,320 I hate being the bad guy. 325 00:14:15,322 --> 00:14:17,388 You know, instead of breaking up with them 326 00:14:17,390 --> 00:14:19,891 I just stop calling and, like, hope they go away. 327 00:14:19,893 --> 00:14:22,060 Damn. 328 00:14:22,062 --> 00:14:24,329 Well, Harvard is not going away, okay? 329 00:14:24,331 --> 00:14:27,732 If you want him to be happy, you got to dump his ass. 330 00:14:27,734 --> 00:14:28,967 Okay. Fine. 331 00:14:28,969 --> 00:14:30,668 So, what do I say? 332 00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:31,803 Guys are idiots, okay? 333 00:14:31,805 --> 00:14:33,137 You can't be subtle. 334 00:14:33,139 --> 00:14:34,505 If you want him to get the message, 335 00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:36,140 you got to hit him in the head with a rock. 336 00:14:36,142 --> 00:14:38,610 Here. Feel this dent right here. 337 00:14:40,012 --> 00:14:41,246 Oh, my God. 338 00:14:41,248 --> 00:14:44,082 Tanya, 2012. 339 00:14:44,084 --> 00:14:46,251 And it took two rocks. 340 00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:49,921 We still friends, though. 341 00:14:51,090 --> 00:14:53,324 - What's up? - I got to go see Mansfield. 342 00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:54,759 I finally have leverage. 343 00:14:54,761 --> 00:14:56,527 I just got a job offer from McCabe. 344 00:14:56,529 --> 00:14:58,196 Oh. 345 00:14:58,198 --> 00:14:59,931 That's great for you. 346 00:14:59,933 --> 00:15:02,000 Uh... One question. 347 00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:04,068 Were you wearing the gloves and holding the plunger 348 00:15:04,070 --> 00:15:05,005 when you got the offer? 349 00:15:05,036 --> 00:15:05,737 Actually, I was. 350 00:15:05,739 --> 00:15:07,071 Funny, right? 351 00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:09,540 Yeah, that's hilarious. 352 00:15:09,542 --> 00:15:14,512 It looks like I'm crying, but I'm laughing. 353 00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:17,382 Sir? 354 00:15:17,384 --> 00:15:20,218 Yes? What do you want? I am very busy. 355 00:15:20,220 --> 00:15:21,586 I just wanted to let you know 356 00:15:21,588 --> 00:15:23,054 I got a job offer from Jasper McCabe. 357 00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:25,089 Oh, well done. Congratulations. 358 00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:27,358 But I also wanted you to know that I turned it down. 359 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:28,860 That was stupid. 360 00:15:28,862 --> 00:15:30,428 No. No, you don't understand. 361 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,964 I just turned down a high-paying job with your competitor 362 00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:34,899 so I could stay up here and work for you. 363 00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:36,534 As my personal plumber? 364 00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:41,072 No. I should not have brought the plunger. 365 00:15:41,074 --> 00:15:42,440 Finally! 366 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,475 I've been on hold for two hours. 367 00:15:44,477 --> 00:15:47,412 This is a medical emergency! 368 00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:49,814 Hey, Harvard. When you get a sec, I'd love to talk to you. 369 00:15:49,816 --> 00:15:52,550 Oh, yeah, what's up? 370 00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:56,921 Um, so, the thing is... 371 00:15:56,923 --> 00:15:59,824 oh, God, I'm not good at this. 372 00:15:59,826 --> 00:16:01,326 Um, okay. 373 00:16:01,328 --> 00:16:06,998 Harvard, you and I cannot continue like this. 374 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,567 I knew this day would come. 375 00:16:09,569 --> 00:16:12,337 We have to tell Brody about us. 376 00:16:12,339 --> 00:16:14,973 I'm gonna need a rock. 377 00:16:14,975 --> 00:16:17,508 An engagement ring? 378 00:16:17,510 --> 00:16:20,611 No, Harvard, you're not listening to me. 379 00:16:20,613 --> 00:16:21,813 I am listening. 380 00:16:21,815 --> 00:16:23,614 I just don't understand. 381 00:16:23,616 --> 00:16:25,483 I want to be here, and you need me. 382 00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,352 Half your managers have jumped ship, 383 00:16:27,354 --> 00:16:28,853 but I stayed loyal to you. 384 00:16:28,855 --> 00:16:30,188 Oh, wait a minute. 385 00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:31,956 You want to talk to me about loyalty? 386 00:16:31,958 --> 00:16:34,325 Not anymore. 387 00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:39,263 I picked you... you to open our new office. 388 00:16:39,265 --> 00:16:42,200 You were supposed to fly with me to Hong Kong. 389 00:16:42,202 --> 00:16:43,768 And we were gonna... 390 00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:47,271 We were gonna build this whole thing together. 391 00:16:47,273 --> 00:16:50,608 Instead, you flew to Paris with your girlfriend 392 00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:54,679 and you left me on that goddamn airplane all by myself, alone. 393 00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:57,382 You lied to me. 394 00:16:57,384 --> 00:16:59,751 You let me down. 395 00:17:02,721 --> 00:17:06,491 And, son, you broke my heart. 396 00:17:06,493 --> 00:17:10,461 Sir... I know I messed up. 397 00:17:10,463 --> 00:17:14,365 But I only did it one time. 398 00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:21,139 When you violate my trust one time, just once, 399 00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:23,808 you can never get back to zero. 400 00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:25,910 Never. 401 00:17:25,912 --> 00:17:28,012 You can't mean never. 402 00:17:28,014 --> 00:17:30,248 W-what about in 30 years 403 00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,649 when I find you on Facebook 404 00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:33,251 after your first failed marriage? 405 00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:36,587 Oh, sure, you've, you know, let yourself go. 406 00:17:36,589 --> 00:17:38,890 But, hey, I like you like that. 407 00:17:38,892 --> 00:17:41,859 You know? I mean, obviously, don't go crazy. 408 00:17:41,861 --> 00:17:45,596 It is not crazy to want things to go back to the way they were. 409 00:17:45,598 --> 00:17:48,099 I'm sure someday you and I 410 00:17:48,101 --> 00:17:51,269 could have a, uh, a different relationship. 411 00:17:51,271 --> 00:17:53,337 But please listen to me carefully. 412 00:17:53,339 --> 00:17:56,841 Things are never gonna be the way they were. 413 00:17:56,843 --> 00:18:00,511 If this is one of your tests, you need to be clear, 414 00:18:00,513 --> 00:18:04,449 because I can't do this anymore and I am prepared to leave. 415 00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:06,617 I don't know why this is so hard for me. 416 00:18:06,619 --> 00:18:08,386 I don't know what you're trying to tell me. 417 00:18:08,388 --> 00:18:10,121 Just help me to help you and then... 418 00:18:10,123 --> 00:18:12,090 I'm trying to help you help me. 419 00:18:12,092 --> 00:18:14,892 But I'm trying to help... 420 00:18:14,894 --> 00:18:16,861 It's over. 421 00:18:16,863 --> 00:18:18,396 It's over. 422 00:18:18,398 --> 00:18:20,932 Okay. 423 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:24,102 Okay. 424 00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:26,771 Wait, are you breaking up with me? 425 00:18:35,447 --> 00:18:37,482 Harvard, I'm sorry. 426 00:18:37,484 --> 00:18:41,452 I've never broken up with anybody before, 427 00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:44,455 and I just... I really didn't want to hurt you. 428 00:18:44,457 --> 00:18:46,958 You're not the first girl who wasn't going out with me 429 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,459 to break up with me. 430 00:18:51,730 --> 00:18:54,465 And if you want to know the truth, 431 00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:56,234 you won't be the last. 432 00:18:56,236 --> 00:18:58,903 Just as long as you're okay. 433 00:18:58,905 --> 00:19:01,739 Yeah, I'm... I'm fine. 434 00:19:06,278 --> 00:19:08,346 So, how you really doing, Harvard? 435 00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:10,681 I hurt bad. 436 00:19:10,683 --> 00:19:12,683 You know what? 437 00:19:12,685 --> 00:19:14,352 Why don't you call that Lindsay girl? 438 00:19:14,354 --> 00:19:15,620 Yeah. 439 00:19:15,622 --> 00:19:18,923 I don't know who that is. 440 00:19:18,925 --> 00:19:20,791 Well, maybe you need a little while. 441 00:19:20,793 --> 00:19:22,760 Come here. 442 00:19:26,198 --> 00:19:28,232 That explains it. Okay. 443 00:19:35,107 --> 00:19:36,541 Mr. Mansfield, 444 00:19:36,543 --> 00:19:39,143 I know you're not supposed to be disturbed 445 00:19:39,145 --> 00:19:41,345 while you're playing army, but, uh, 446 00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:43,147 one of the guys from downstairs 447 00:19:43,149 --> 00:19:45,116 wanted to know if he could come in. 448 00:19:45,118 --> 00:19:46,551 Good. 449 00:19:46,553 --> 00:19:49,487 I, uh, I might have been a little harsh on him. 450 00:19:49,489 --> 00:19:52,957 Y-young lady, have you ever said something to someone 451 00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:55,359 and then regretted it immediately? 452 00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:58,162 Every second of every day, sir. 453 00:19:58,164 --> 00:19:59,797 Well, yeah, send him in. 454 00:20:02,401 --> 00:20:05,336 Mr. Mansfield, I'm supposed to drip feed your succulents. 455 00:20:05,338 --> 00:20:07,905 I hope that means plants. 456 00:20:11,343 --> 00:20:12,743 To be honest with you, 457 00:20:12,745 --> 00:20:15,012 I thought you were going to be someone else. 458 00:20:15,014 --> 00:20:16,747 I don't... don't suppose you know 459 00:20:16,749 --> 00:20:18,549 if Mr. Moyer is still downstairs? 460 00:20:18,551 --> 00:20:21,686 Nah, he left. He took a job with that guy Jasper McCabe. 461 00:20:21,688 --> 00:20:23,821 I see. 462 00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:26,290 Yeah, they offered me a job, but I turned it down. 463 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:30,661 Son of a bitch! 464 00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:32,330 There he is. 465 00:20:32,332 --> 00:20:35,066 My big fish. Come here. Come on. 466 00:20:35,068 --> 00:20:37,602 Yep! 467 00:20:37,604 --> 00:20:39,036 Oh, you actually want me to... uh-huh. 468 00:20:39,038 --> 00:20:42,073 Okay. 469 00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:45,843 Welcome to the big leagues, my man. 470 00:20:58,558 --> 00:21:00,191 Did you just say sunshine? 471 00:21:00,193 --> 00:21:01,525 What's up? guy. 325 00:14:15,322 --> 00:14:17,388 You know, instead of breaking up with them 326 00:14:17,390 --> 00:14:19,891 I just stop calling and, like, hope they go away. 327 00:14:19,893 --> 00:14:22,060 Damn. 328 00:14:22,062 --> 00:14:24,329 Well, Harvard is not going away, okay? 329 00:14:24,331 --> 00:14:27,732 If you want him to be happy, you got to dump his ass. 330 00:14:27,734 --> 00:14:28,967 Okay. Fine. 331 00:14:28,969 --> 00:14:30,668 So, what do I say? 332 00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:31,803 Guys are idiots, okay? 333 00:14:31,805 --> 00:14:33,137 You can't be subtle. 334 00:14:33,139 --> 00:14:34,505 If you want him to get the message, 335 00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:36,140 you got to hit him in the head with a rock. 336 00:14:36,142 --> 00:14:38,610 Here. Feel this dent right here. 337 00:14:40,012 --> 00:14:41,246 Oh, my God. 338 00:14:41,248 --> 00:14:44,082 Tanya, 2012. 339 00:14:44,084 --> 00:14:46,251 And it took two rocks. 340 00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:49,921 We still friends, though. 341 00:14:51,090 --> 00:14:53,324 - What's up? - I got to go see Mansfield. 342 00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:54,759 I finally have leverage. 343 00:14:54,761 --> 00:14:56,527 I just got a job offer from McCabe. 344 00:14:56,529 --> 00:14:58,196 Oh. 345 00:14:58,198 --> 00:14:59,931 That's great for you. 346 00:14:59,933 --> 00:15:02,000 Uh... One question. 347 00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:04,068 Were you wearing the gloves and holding the plunger 348 00:15:04,070 --> 00:15:05,005 when you got the offer? 349 00:15:05,036 --> 00:15:05,737 Actually, I was. 350 00:15:05,739 --> 00:15:07,071 Funny, right? 351 00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:09,540 Yeah, that's hilarious. 352 00:15:09,542 --> 00:15:14,512 It looks like I'm crying, but I'm laughing. 353 00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:17,382 Sir? 354 00:15:17,384 --> 00:15:20,218 Yes? What do you want? I am very busy. 355 00:15:20,220 --> 00:15:21,586 I just wanted to let you know 356 00:15:21,588 --> 00:15:23,054 I got a job offer from Jasper McCabe. 357 00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:25,089 Oh, well done. Congratulations. 358 00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:27,358 But I also wanted you to know that I turned it down. 359 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:28,860 That was stupid. 360 00:15:28,862 --> 00:15:30,428 No. No, you don't understand. 361 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,964 I just turned down a high-paying job with your competitor 362 00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:34,899 so I could stay up here and work for you. 363 00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:36,534 As my personal plumber? 364 00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:41,072 No. I should not have brought the plunger. 365 00:15:41,074 --> 00:15:42,440 Finally! 366 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,475 I've been on hold for two hours. 367 00:15:44,477 --> 00:15:47,412 This is a medical emergency! 368 00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:49,814 Hey, Harvard. When you get a sec, I'd love to talk to you. 369 00:15:49,816 --> 00:15:52,550 Oh, yeah, what's up? 370 00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:56,921 Um, so, the thing is... 371 00:15:56,923 --> 00:15:59,824 oh, God, I'm not good at this. 372 00:15:59,826 --> 00:16:01,326 Um, okay. 373 00:16:01,328 --> 00:16:06,998 Harvard, you and I cannot continue like this. 374 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,567 I knew this day would come. 375 00:16:09,569 --> 00:16:12,337 We have to tell Brody about us. 376 00:16:12,339 --> 00:16:14,973 I'm gonna need a rock. 377 00:16:14,975 --> 00:16:17,508 An engagement ring? 378 00:16:17,510 --> 00:16:20,611 No, Harvard, you're not listening to me. 379 00:16:20,613 --> 00:16:21,813 I am listening. 380 00:16:21,815 --> 00:16:23,614 I just don't understand. 381 00:16:23,616 --> 00:16:25,483 I want to be here, and you need me. 382 00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,352 Half your managers have jumped ship, 383 00:16:27,354 --> 00:16:28,853 but I stayed loyal to you. 384 00:16:28,855 --> 00:16:30,188 Oh, wait a minute. 385 00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:31,956 You want to talk to me about loyalty? 386 00:16:31,958 --> 00:16:34,325 Not anymore. 387 00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:39,263 I picked you... you to open our new office. 388 00:16:39,265 --> 00:16:42,200 You were supposed to fly with me to Hong Kong. 389 00:16:42,202 --> 00:16:43,768 And we were gonna... 390 00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:47,271 We were gonna build this whole thing together. 391 00:16:47,273 --> 00:16:50,608 Instead, you flew to Paris with your girlfriend 392 00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:54,679 and you left me on that goddamn airplane all by myself, alone. 393 00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:57,382 You lied to me. 394 00:16:57,384 --> 00:16:59,751 You let me down. 395 00:17:02,721 --> 00:17:06,491 And, son, you broke my heart. 396 00:17:06,493 --> 00:17:10,461 Sir... I know I messed up. 397 00:17:10,463 --> 00:17:14,365 But I only did it one time. 398 00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:21,139 When you violate my trust one time, just once, 399 00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:23,808 you can never get back to zero. 400 00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:25,910 Never. 401 00:17:25,912 --> 00:17:28,012 You can't mean never. 402 00:17:28,014 --> 00:17:30,248 W-what about in 30 years 403 00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,649 when I find you on Facebook 404 00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:33,251 after your first failed marriage? 405 00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:36,587 Oh, sure, you've, you know, let yourself go. 406 00:17:36,589 --> 00:17:38,890 But, hey, I like you like that. 407 00:17:38,892 --> 00:17:41,859 You know? I mean, obviously, don't go crazy. 408 00:17:41,861 --> 00:17:45,596 It is not crazy to want things to go back to the way they were. 409 00:17:45,598 --> 00:17:48,099 I'm sure someday you and I 410 00:17:48,101 --> 00:17:51,269 could have a, uh, a different relationship. 411 00:17:51,271 --> 00:17:53,337 But please listen to me carefully. 412 00:17:53,339 --> 00:17:56,841 Things are never gonna be the way they were. 413 00:17:56,843 --> 00:18:00,511 If this is one of your tests, you need to be clear, 414 00:18:00,513 --> 00:18:04,449 because I can't do this anymore and I am prepared to leave. 415 00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:06,617 I don't know why this is so hard for me. 416 00:18:06,619 --> 00:18:08,386 I don't know what you're trying to tell me. 417 00:18:08,388 --> 00:18:10,121 Just help me to help you and then... 418 00:18:10,123 --> 00:18:12,090 I'm trying to help you help me. 419 00:18:12,092 --> 00:18:14,892 But I'm trying to help... 420 00:18:14,894 --> 00:18:16,861 It's over. 421 00:18:16,863 --> 00:18:18,396 It's over. 422 00:18:18,398 --> 00:18:20,932 Okay. 423 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:24,102 Okay. 424 00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:26,771 Wait, are you breaking up with me? 425 00:18:35,447 --> 00:18:37,482 Harvard, I'm sorry. 426 00:18:37,484 --> 00:18:41,452 I've never broken up with anybody before, 427 00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:44,455 and I just... I really didn't want to hurt you. 428 00:18:44,457 -->