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-== [ www.OpenSubtitles.com ] ==-
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Hi, everybody. Welcome
once again to Tool Time.
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I'm Tim Taylor, and of
course you all know Al.
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Borland.
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Al, why would they need
to know your last name?
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You always tell
them your last name.
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Al, if they don't know who I am,
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they won't know
who you are, right, Al?
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Borland.
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Well, we're gonna be hanging
some dry wall today, Al Borland.
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That's right, Tim... Taylor.
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Since we're hanging it,
maybe we'll need a noose.
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I don't think so, Tim.
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I'll be hanging the
wallboard today
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with my trusty
Binford crown hammer.
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It's one of the
best you can buy.
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Now, when hanging wallboard,
always make your nail flush.
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That gives you
the perfect dimple.
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Suppose they call it a
dimple because it's...
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No, I don't, Tim.
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Hanging dry wall is
actually pretty easy.
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Easy procedure if
you follow instructions.
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Matter of fact, if you follow
the proper instructions,
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00:02:04,024 --> 00:02:06,002
it takes hardly any time at all.
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Al, I didn't say to go yet.
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(mumbles) Well, I was...
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00:02:09,763 --> 00:02:12,075
I was just trying
to speed things up.
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This isn't a race,
Al. I know that, Tim.
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Because if it was, I think
you know what would happen.
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Yes, I do, Tim.
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Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
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Sounds like a little
challenge from Mr. Al Borland.
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You don't really want to
compete with me, do you?
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00:02:31,452 --> 00:02:33,597
Well, Tim, when it
comes to you and me,
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there is no competition.
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Maybe the audience
would like to see
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a little friendly wallboard
race between Al and I.
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What do you think, folks?
(cheers and applause)
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Let's see who can nail this
bad boy top to bottom first.
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Ready?
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Ready.
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Set? Set.
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Go!
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Well, I guess it's pretty easy
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to see who won that, Al.
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We have to tape our stuff...
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Yes, it is, Tim.
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Randy, get this
off of me right now.
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00:03:29,142 --> 00:03:33,657
Dad, no man has ever escaped
Randy's Handcuffs of Death.
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00:03:33,681 --> 00:03:35,659
Spray Dad with silly string.
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00:03:35,683 --> 00:03:38,161
No, don't spray Dad with
silly string. Cap those things.
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Take these off right now. Fun is fun.
Come on. What are the magic words?
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No allowance.
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Hey, Dad, I heard
a great joke today.
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What was it? OK.
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What did the moron
have for breakfast?
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I don't know.
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This morning you had
scrambled eggs and toast.
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(boys laughing)
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00:04:04,878 --> 00:04:06,756
OK, it's family night.
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00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:08,758
What have we decided to do?
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We wanna play video games.
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(all) Yeah!
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No, I think that we
should just stay home
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and play charades.
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00:04:16,857 --> 00:04:17,834
(all) Aah!
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Wait, wait, wait, wait.
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Bowling. How about bowling?
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00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:24,140
Haven't done that in
a while. Not bowling.
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They got a video arcade
at the bowling alley.
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(boys) Yeah, bowling!
Get your coats. Come on!
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It'll be fun, honey.
(imitates ball rolling)
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00:04:32,139 --> 00:04:34,217
I got a great joke for you.
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00:04:34,241 --> 00:04:35,685
What?
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00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:37,420
What did the moron
have for breakfast?
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00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:40,357
Today you had cereal
and an English muffin.
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(boys laughing)
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(Brad) Ooh, good, Mom.
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You're all wrong. I
had rye toast. Ha-ha-ha.
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(Brad) Shotgun!
(Randy) Hey, no way!
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Hey, I ride shotgun.
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So, since we are
bowling tonight,
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00:04:55,329 --> 00:04:58,608
promise me you won't
behave like an obnoxious jerk.
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00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:01,911
What kind of jerk would you like me
to be? You're obsessed with winning.
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00:05:01,935 --> 00:05:03,913
You're the most
competitive person I know,
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00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:05,415
and when you do win,
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00:05:05,439 --> 00:05:07,584
you always do that
obnoxious victory dance.
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Na-na-na-na-na-na.
I won, I won, I won.
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00:05:11,111 --> 00:05:13,290
Oh, you frighten me
sometimes, honey.
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00:05:13,314 --> 00:05:15,592
You're just doing that
because you always lose.
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Always lose? We
only play once a year.
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And you always lose.
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You can't help
you're a lousy bowler.
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You're a woman.
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Nothing gets by you, huh, Tim?
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The point I'm trying to make
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is it's not fair for women
to compete with men.
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Heck, men, we're stronger,
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we throw the ball harder...
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Uh, we're stronger,
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so we throw the ball harder.
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Well put, Tim. You're not
gonna behave like a jerk tonight
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because we're not going to
compete, we're not gonna keep score.
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How do we know who wins?
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00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:53,196
We don't care about
winning, only about having fun.
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All right, we'll have
fun. You'll have fun.
107
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We won't keep score,
we won't compete.
108
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All right.
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Race you to the car.
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No!
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Come on, come on. In 3.1...
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This is stupid. 1...
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I'm not doing it. 2...
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Besides, your shoelace
is untied. 3! (laughs)
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OK, this is all
you're gonna get.
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Don't come begging
for more quarters.
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(Brad and Randy) Thanks, Mom.
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Tim, what is this?
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I thought you said we
weren't gonna keep score.
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I'm just putting our names
down so we know whose turn it is.
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There's only two of us playing.
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After my turn, whose turn is it?
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I don't know. Let
me check the sheet.
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Well, look at
that. It's my turn.
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Just shut up and bowl.
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OK.
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Mark, you're gonna be
seeing raw power in motion.
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Ar-ar-ar-ar.
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Raw power in the form of
precision fluid movements
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with a bowling pin-type radar
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that will destroy
everything in its path.
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(grunting)
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Gutter ball.
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I had a little muscle
cramp or something.
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(Jill laughs)
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You always gotta warm up
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before you bowl that first one.
138
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Well, now I show
no mercy at all.
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See that set down there,
that one pin still shaking?
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You know why that's shaking?
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'Cause that pin
knows what's coming.
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That pin's going, "Please,
please, Master Bowler,
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don't hit me!"
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You're dead, pin.
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You're dead!
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You and your nine
scrawny friends, too.
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Uhh.
148
00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:44,028
Uhh!
149
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Yay, Dad, you did it.
150
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You knocked down that one pin!
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00:07:53,340 --> 00:07:58,387
Yeah, and you left his
nine scrawny friends.
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00:07:58,411 --> 00:08:01,390
Jill, would you do me a favor
and walk down in the alley
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00:08:01,414 --> 00:08:03,560
and dress up like a
bowling pin for me?
154
00:08:03,584 --> 00:08:07,418
Well, that is the one place I
wouldn't get hit by a bowling ball.
155
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Look at this guy. He
has 120,000 points.
156
00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:17,039
Randy, what's your best?
157
00:08:17,063 --> 00:08:19,476
1,000,005, but tonight
I'm gonna beat it,
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00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:21,478
and it's gonna
say my initials "RT"
159
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right on the top of the screen.
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Hey. Hey!
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What?
162
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:29,452
That's my machine.
163
00:08:29,476 --> 00:08:32,956
Oh, yeah. Is your name Zaxxon?
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I just put a quarter in it.
You can play the next game.
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00:08:36,550 --> 00:08:39,195
And what if I
wanna play this one?
166
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Well, well, well,
167
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looks like I got a free game.
168
00:08:42,489 --> 00:08:44,534
Hey, that's my quarter.
169
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Duh. Really?
170
00:08:46,226 --> 00:08:48,905
Hey, Duh, you better let
my brother play the game.
171
00:08:48,929 --> 00:08:50,740
Oh, you really got me worried.
172
00:08:50,764 --> 00:08:53,676
Always scares me when I can
see the top of somebody's head.
173
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,012
Brad, come on.
174
00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:58,014
We don't have to take this.
175
00:08:58,038 --> 00:09:00,282
Yes, we do! Oh, my God.
176
00:09:00,306 --> 00:09:03,720
Hey, Duh, if it
wasn't for my brother,
177
00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:05,722
you'd be dead meat.
178
00:09:05,746 --> 00:09:07,445
Yeah? Rrah!
179
00:09:11,852 --> 00:09:13,029
Please, please, please...
180
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:15,031
I hope the ball gets to the pins
181
00:09:15,055 --> 00:09:17,534
before the lanes close, hon.
182
00:09:17,558 --> 00:09:20,102
Yes! Yes!
183
00:09:20,126 --> 00:09:22,972
You knocked them all down!
184
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:25,675
Yes, honey, that's
called a strike.
185
00:09:25,699 --> 00:09:29,300
You didn't knock 'em down.
They dropped dead from boredom.
186
00:09:31,304 --> 00:09:34,283
Hey, it doesn't matter
how they get down
187
00:09:34,307 --> 00:09:36,986
as long as they get down.
188
00:09:37,010 --> 00:09:38,655
Wait a minute. What's this?
189
00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:41,157
We're not gonna compete.
We're just here for fun.
190
00:09:41,181 --> 00:09:42,759
What's this all about?
191
00:09:42,783 --> 00:09:44,661
Well, I'm not
keeping score here.
192
00:09:44,685 --> 00:09:46,829
I'm just writing down
that I got a strike.
193
00:09:46,853 --> 00:09:51,233
If you like, I can write
down that you got a... one.
194
00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:53,235
The only reason you got a strike
195
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:55,237
is 'cause we're not competing.
196
00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:57,574
Oh. Oh, so if we were competing,
197
00:09:57,598 --> 00:10:00,944
then you'd be throwing the strikes
and I'd be throwing the gutter balls?
198
00:10:00,968 --> 00:10:04,647
Yes, because women
collapse under pressure.
199
00:10:04,671 --> 00:10:05,848
Oh, really?
200
00:10:05,872 --> 00:10:08,551
Well, that last ball
was a practice ball.
201
00:10:08,575 --> 00:10:10,553
This one counts.
We're keeping score.
202
00:10:10,577 --> 00:10:12,555
I thought you didn't
want to keep score.
203
00:10:12,579 --> 00:10:15,959
Oh, is the great,
big bad bowling man
204
00:10:15,983 --> 00:10:18,094
afraid his itty-bitty wife
205
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:20,229
is gonna beat him?
206
00:10:20,253 --> 00:10:23,700
Is the itty-bitty wife
207
00:10:23,724 --> 00:10:25,835
afraid the great,
big bowling man
208
00:10:25,859 --> 00:10:28,593
is gonna leave her
in the parking lot?!
209
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:37,836
OK. We're having some fun now.
210
00:10:39,439 --> 00:10:40,783
Ahchoo!
211
00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:43,352
Gesundheit.
212
00:10:43,376 --> 00:10:45,021
Please, please, please,
please, please, please,
213
00:10:45,045 --> 00:10:47,724
please, please,
please, please...
214
00:10:47,748 --> 00:10:49,291
(pins clatter) Yes!
215
00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:51,716
Two strikes in a row! Yes!
216
00:10:53,453 --> 00:10:55,164
Ah!
217
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:58,635
I sucked you in now.
218
00:10:58,659 --> 00:11:01,403
It's time for the real
bowling to start now.
219
00:11:01,427 --> 00:11:04,007
Go, Daddy! Hit another pin!
220
00:11:04,031 --> 00:11:06,998
(Jill laughs)
221
00:11:09,770 --> 00:11:11,981
Hey, Timmy! Hey-hey!
222
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:13,616
Hey. Whoa.
223
00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:16,285
Hey, sorry, pal. Didn't
mean to throw ya.
224
00:11:16,309 --> 00:11:18,955
Hey, Rock. Hey, Dwayne, Pete.
225
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:21,624
Remember these guys... the
cooking show on Tool Time?
226
00:11:21,648 --> 00:11:23,660
Oh, yes. This is my wife Jill.
227
00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:26,896
And my youngest
boy Mark and my ball.
228
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:29,732
Hey, Roger, we're gonna
be bowling next to a superstar.
229
00:11:29,756 --> 00:11:31,734
You recognize that
guy? Yeah, sure do.
230
00:11:31,758 --> 00:11:33,269
How you doing, buddy?
231
00:11:33,293 --> 00:11:34,403
How you doing?
232
00:11:34,427 --> 00:11:36,405
That's Tim "the
Tool Man" Taylor.
233
00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:38,407
He works with Al.
You know, I love Al.
234
00:11:38,431 --> 00:11:39,542
Al's great.
235
00:11:39,566 --> 00:11:42,712
Hey, we all love
Al. (Rock) Yeah.
236
00:11:42,736 --> 00:11:45,314
Hey, Tim, we're gonna be
practicing right here next to you.
237
00:11:45,338 --> 00:11:48,051
We got a league game tonight.
238
00:11:48,075 --> 00:11:50,053
Boy, Pete, it sure is
gonna be intimidati"
239
00:11:50,077 --> 00:11:53,056
bowling next to a
celebrity like Tim Taylor.
240
00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:54,791
Oh, you got that right.
241
00:11:54,815 --> 00:11:57,794
Hey, Tim, I bet you got
a real high average, huh?
242
00:11:57,818 --> 00:12:00,462
I don't like to brag,
you know, but...
243
00:12:00,486 --> 00:12:03,800
I've knocked a few
pins down in my day.
244
00:12:03,824 --> 00:12:06,736
I know of one tonight.
245
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:10,306
Come on, guys. We got a
game soon. Let's get ready.
246
00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:13,375
You folks go right ahead. Just
pretend we're not even here.
247
00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:15,578
Good to see you
guys. You, too, Timmy.
248
00:12:15,602 --> 00:12:17,568
(Velcro ripping)
249
00:12:23,009 --> 00:12:25,121
(Velcro rips)
250
00:12:25,145 --> 00:12:26,122
Guys...
251
00:12:26,146 --> 00:12:28,279
Sorry.
252
00:12:41,294 --> 00:12:43,439
(Jill laughs)
253
00:12:43,463 --> 00:12:45,983
You knocked down all their pins.
254
00:12:47,333 --> 00:12:48,477
(laughing)
255
00:12:48,501 --> 00:12:50,479
Come on, guys. That's a joke.
256
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:52,982
Oh! Good one, pal.
257
00:12:53,006 --> 00:12:57,586
Hey! Hey, anybody can knock
down the pins in their own lane.
258
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,710
Oh, yeah.
259
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:04,627
Aw, man, awesome.
You're gonna beat the record.
260
00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:07,163
Shh! You'll break
my concentration.
261
00:13:07,187 --> 00:13:08,831
He's gonna break whose record?
262
00:13:08,855 --> 00:13:12,468
(Brad) The guy
in first place... CP.
263
00:13:12,492 --> 00:13:14,470
Hey, hey, those are my initials.
264
00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:16,161
Bummer.
265
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,441
I don't have to play.
266
00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:21,778
No, play. He's gonna
beat your record.
267
00:13:21,802 --> 00:13:23,112
No, I'm not. Yes, you are.
268
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:24,947
No, he's not!
269
00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:28,384
See, 'cause this machine
breaks down all the time.
270
00:13:28,408 --> 00:13:31,487
See? Broken.
271
00:13:31,511 --> 00:13:34,723
You didn't have
to pull the plug.
272
00:13:34,747 --> 00:13:36,826
Yeah? So I did. What are
you gonna do about it, huh?
273
00:13:36,850 --> 00:13:38,995
Hey, don't shove my brother.
274
00:13:39,019 --> 00:13:40,663
What, you mean like this?
275
00:13:40,687 --> 00:13:42,531
(sighs)
276
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:44,934
Look, you win,
277
00:13:44,958 --> 00:13:46,568
'cause you're bigger,
278
00:13:46,592 --> 00:13:48,905
you're stronger...
279
00:13:48,929 --> 00:13:51,040
I just wanna say one thing.
280
00:13:51,064 --> 00:13:53,642
What?
281
00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:55,244
Rrah! Oh!
282
00:13:55,268 --> 00:13:58,136
(Brad yelling)
283
00:14:02,976 --> 00:14:04,253
Ow!
284
00:14:04,277 --> 00:14:06,155
Come on, come on, let him go.
285
00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:09,591
No. First say...
286
00:14:09,615 --> 00:14:11,593
that I'm the king of Zaxxon.
287
00:14:11,617 --> 00:14:14,563
Don't do anything
he says, Randy.
288
00:14:14,587 --> 00:14:17,066
If I say it, will you
let him go? Maybe.
289
00:14:17,090 --> 00:14:20,236
OK. You're the king of
Zaxxon. Now, let him go.
290
00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:23,572
No. First I want you
to tell me that I'm...
291
00:14:23,596 --> 00:14:26,775
I'm the best-looking
guy in the bowling alley.
292
00:14:26,799 --> 00:14:29,912
Oh, gag me. Aah!
293
00:14:29,936 --> 00:14:32,748
OK, you're the
best-looking guy here.
294
00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:34,772
Hey, thanks for the compliment.
295
00:14:37,410 --> 00:14:40,178
And don't touch
my machine again.
296
00:14:47,653 --> 00:14:49,732
That guy was a dip wad.
297
00:14:49,756 --> 00:14:51,734
No kidding, but
why'd you give in?
298
00:14:51,758 --> 00:14:54,971
I was just getting
ready to make my move.
299
00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:58,841
Yeah, to the hospital.
300
00:14:58,865 --> 00:15:01,177
How could you say he
was the king of Zaxxon?
301
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:03,567
You're ten times
better than him.
302
00:15:07,941 --> 00:15:09,585
Forget about that.
303
00:15:09,609 --> 00:15:11,720
We've gotta get
even with this guy.
304
00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:13,722
I could jump him from behind.
305
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,824
Yeah, and he'll wedge
you into the floor.
306
00:15:15,848 --> 00:15:18,727
You got a better idea?
307
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,063
Yeah, I do.
308
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:23,221
Come on, follow me. OK.
309
00:15:27,460 --> 00:15:29,805
Please, please, please, please,
please, please, please, please,
310
00:15:29,829 --> 00:15:32,808
please, please, please, please,
please, please, please, please...
311
00:15:32,832 --> 00:15:36,045
(pins clatter) (all
but Tim) Yeah!
312
00:15:36,069 --> 00:15:40,416
Hey, Mrs. Taylor,
four strikes in a row.
313
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:43,419
Uh, I don't mean to
criticize you there, Timmy,
314
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,922
but you didn't carry
over her last strike.
315
00:15:45,946 --> 00:15:48,857
See, that would make
that a 134, not a 124.
316
00:15:48,881 --> 00:15:52,795
Good eye, Rock.
317
00:15:52,819 --> 00:15:54,830
Mark, Mark, come on.
318
00:15:54,854 --> 00:15:56,832
Hey, hey, hey, where you going?
319
00:15:56,856 --> 00:15:58,767
Um, Mark's coming with us.
320
00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:01,270
Well, OK, but you
keep an eye on him.
321
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,605
Boy, Tim, you're
really taking this well.
322
00:16:03,629 --> 00:16:06,608
I mean, if my wife were
beating the pants off of me,
323
00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:09,045
I'd be looking for
a place to hide.
324
00:16:09,069 --> 00:16:11,713
Actually, Rock, I'm trying
to go easy on my wife.
325
00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:13,215
She's had a bad week.
326
00:16:13,239 --> 00:16:16,152
Her mom was convicted
of grand theft auto.
327
00:16:16,176 --> 00:16:19,510
Hmm. You're a good man, Tim.
328
00:16:21,581 --> 00:16:23,092
Excuse me, ma'am,
329
00:16:23,116 --> 00:16:25,928
but you are an
extraordinary bowler.
330
00:16:25,952 --> 00:16:27,930
Oh, well, thank you,
331
00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:30,732
but I don't think I'm
very extraordinary.
332
00:16:30,756 --> 00:16:33,402
It's just that my
approach to the game
333
00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:36,372
is somewhat
different than Tim's.
334
00:16:36,396 --> 00:16:38,907
And better.
335
00:16:38,931 --> 00:16:40,977
Uh, me and Pete,
we was wonderin',
336
00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:42,644
what is your secret?
337
00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:45,814
No, it sounds too stupid.
338
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:47,816
Oh, come on, honey. Tell 'em.
339
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:48,951
(Dwayne) Yeah.
340
00:16:48,975 --> 00:16:51,287
Well, OK, I will.
341
00:16:51,311 --> 00:16:53,289
I know it sounds silly,
342
00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:56,025
but when I approach the line,
343
00:16:56,049 --> 00:16:58,827
I always do this.
344
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:01,163
Ashes, ashes,
345
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:04,555
we all fall down.
346
00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:10,006
That's it?
347
00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:11,940
I know it sounds ridiculous,
348
00:17:11,964 --> 00:17:13,509
but it relaxes me.
349
00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:16,812
You should try it. See, just
start on your left foot and go...
350
00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:19,281
(all) Ashes, ashes,
351
00:17:19,305 --> 00:17:21,717
we all fall down.
352
00:17:21,741 --> 00:17:24,887
And then, after I release
the ball, I always do this.
353
00:17:24,911 --> 00:17:27,356
Please, please, please, please,
please, please, please, please, please,
354
00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:28,790
please, please...
355
00:17:28,814 --> 00:17:30,692
Please, please, please,
please, please, please...
356
00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:31,994
(both) Please, please,
please, please, please...
357
00:17:32,018 --> 00:17:34,630
Pete? Yeah.
358
00:17:34,654 --> 00:17:37,466
You're embarrassing yourself.
359
00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:40,736
I am not, and you're
always criticizing.
360
00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:43,539
This is neither the
time nor the place.
361
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,430
Fine.
362
00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:50,246
Mrs. Taylor,
363
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:53,115
I'm terribly sorry to
hear about your mother.
364
00:17:53,139 --> 00:17:55,251
What about my
mother? (Tim) Rock...
365
00:17:55,275 --> 00:18:00,423
Ixnay onsay eft-thay
carthay please-ay?
366
00:18:00,447 --> 00:18:01,623
'Nough said, Timmy.
367
00:18:01,647 --> 00:18:04,026
What are you talking about?
368
00:18:04,050 --> 00:18:06,495
Rock and I are
having a little fun.
369
00:18:06,519 --> 00:18:08,564
Oh, yeah? You
wanna have a little fun?
370
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,566
Why don't we make a bet?
371
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:14,136
A bet? How about in the
form of public humiliation?
372
00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:16,905
We let people watch you bowl?
373
00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:18,096
(laughing)
374
00:18:21,468 --> 00:18:24,213
No, I was thinking maybe
375
00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:26,782
the loser has to
kiss the winner's...
376
00:18:26,806 --> 00:18:28,084
What?
377
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,952
Bowling shoes.
378
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:33,021
(all groan)
379
00:18:33,045 --> 00:18:35,324
Right here in
front of everybody.
380
00:18:35,348 --> 00:18:36,992
(all) Ah!
381
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:39,027
All right, you're on.
382
00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:40,485
(kissing noise)
383
00:18:43,223 --> 00:18:44,533
He's coming. He's coming.
384
00:18:44,557 --> 00:18:46,668
OK, Mark, hide over there.
385
00:18:46,692 --> 00:18:50,906
Brad, you know
what to do. I'm ready.
386
00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:54,676
Hey, thought I told you
boys not to touch my machine.
387
00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:57,313
I've got news for you. My
brother's gonna get high score.
388
00:18:57,337 --> 00:18:58,680
I don't think so.
389
00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:01,150
Get out of my way, maggot.
390
00:19:01,174 --> 00:19:02,218
Now.
391
00:19:02,242 --> 00:19:04,052
What do you think you're doing?
392
00:19:04,076 --> 00:19:05,787
Get these cuffs off me!
393
00:19:05,811 --> 00:19:07,856
I'll break both your faces.
394
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,959
You just come here.
Come here. I don't think so.
395
00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:12,961
Mark, ammo.
396
00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:16,165
Oh, you guys are dead meat.
397
00:19:16,189 --> 00:19:17,966
Dead meat! Whoa! Whoa! Stop!
398
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:19,368
Yeah! Yeah!
399
00:19:19,392 --> 00:19:21,604
Hey, stop it!
400
00:19:21,628 --> 00:19:24,940
You stop it right now! (Mark)
Brad, I think you missed a spot.
401
00:19:24,964 --> 00:19:26,242
(men) Yeah!
402
00:19:26,266 --> 00:19:27,809
Strike!
403
00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:30,479
Great comeback, Tim. Now
you're only down by nine pins.
404
00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:33,149
This is the last frame.
Just do it, all right?
405
00:19:33,173 --> 00:19:35,917
Don't want to make you nervous,
Timmy, but this is the clutch shot.
406
00:19:35,941 --> 00:19:38,387
Kiss 'em all and you win, buddy.
407
00:19:38,411 --> 00:19:41,612
(whispers) Yes. Yes.
408
00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:45,827
So wait a minute.
What are you saying?
409
00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:48,830
You're saying that, like, unless
he gets down every single pin...
410
00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:51,634
which is very hard to do
under all this pressure...
411
00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:53,035
I win?
412
00:19:53,059 --> 00:19:56,472
I think that's exactly
what he's saying, Jill.
413
00:19:56,496 --> 00:19:58,529
(sighs)
414
00:20:01,568 --> 00:20:03,179
(muttering) Ashes, ashes,
415
00:20:03,203 --> 00:20:04,446
all fall down.
416
00:20:04,470 --> 00:20:06,782
(buzzer)
417
00:20:06,806 --> 00:20:08,517
(pins clatter)
418
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:11,953
Hey! Ten pins
down. All fall down.
419
00:20:11,977 --> 00:20:13,955
Ten pins down. I got the crown.
420
00:20:13,979 --> 00:20:17,626
I win, I win, I win, I win, I
win, I win, I win, I win, I win.
421
00:20:17,650 --> 00:20:19,461
I win. I win!
422
00:20:19,485 --> 00:20:22,464
Now, wait a minute,
Tim, I may be wrong,
423
00:20:22,488 --> 00:20:23,965
but doesn't that buzzer
424
00:20:23,989 --> 00:20:26,468
mean it's some kind
of foul or something?
425
00:20:26,492 --> 00:20:28,604
It means the game's
over or something.
426
00:20:28,628 --> 00:20:30,472
No, that's a foul.
427
00:20:30,496 --> 00:20:31,840
That's only in tournament play.
428
00:20:31,864 --> 00:20:33,475
Your strike doesn't
count, buddy.
429
00:20:33,499 --> 00:20:35,678
You mean, I won? No,
it doesn't mean you w...
430
00:20:35,702 --> 00:20:37,846
Yes, it does. She took
you fair and square.
431
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:39,548
Come on, guys, let's bowl.
432
00:20:39,572 --> 00:20:42,184
I believed in you, Tim Taylor.
433
00:20:42,208 --> 00:20:45,887
This is indeed a dark day.
434
00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:47,889
I think Al could have taken her.
435
00:20:47,913 --> 00:20:50,259
(men grumble)
436
00:20:50,283 --> 00:20:53,284
I didn't beat you by that much.
437
00:20:54,721 --> 00:20:56,332
Are you upset, Tim?
438
00:20:56,356 --> 00:20:58,834
No, I had a lot of fun, Jill.
439
00:20:58,858 --> 00:21:00,669
Well, that's good. That's good.
440
00:21:00,693 --> 00:21:03,171
'Cause there's one
thing that you could do
441
00:21:03,195 --> 00:21:05,173
that would make me really happy.
442
00:21:05,197 --> 00:21:06,375
What?
443
00:21:06,399 --> 00:21:08,910
Well, you could take
this old score sheet,
444
00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:12,013
and you could just
have it laminated!
445
00:21:12,037 --> 00:21:13,515
(laughs)
446
00:21:13,539 --> 00:21:15,884
I won! I won! I won!
Na-na-na-na-na-na.
447
00:21:15,908 --> 00:21:19,143
I beat you. I beat
you. I beat you.
448
00:21:23,683 --> 00:21:25,561
You don't have to kiss 'em.
449
00:21:25,585 --> 00:21:28,564
You can just nuzzle them
next to your cheek and whisper,
450
00:21:28,588 --> 00:21:30,908
"You're the best,
Jill. You're the best."
451
00:21:35,595 --> 00:21:39,074
(baby voice) You're the
best, Jill. You're the best.
452
00:21:39,098 --> 00:21:41,076
This is the most
perfect night of my life.
453
00:21:41,100 --> 00:21:43,312
Nothing could
ruin it. Excuse me.
454
00:21:43,336 --> 00:21:48,183
Excuse me. Are these your boys?
455
00:21:48,207 --> 00:21:49,851
What did they do?
456
00:21:49,875 --> 00:21:51,853
They handcuffed a
kid to a video game
457
00:21:51,877 --> 00:21:53,889
and they covered
him with silly string.
458
00:21:53,913 --> 00:21:56,892
Oh, those aren't my boys. I
never seen 'em before in my life.
459
00:21:56,916 --> 00:21:59,216
(both) Aah!
460
00:22:01,421 --> 00:22:04,266
Mom, you don't understand.
He had Brad in a headlock.
461
00:22:04,290 --> 00:22:06,602
Yeah, he was messing up my hair.
462
00:22:06,626 --> 00:22:08,103
I don't care.
463
00:22:08,127 --> 00:22:10,172
You should have
come to us first.
464
00:22:10,196 --> 00:22:13,241
Dad, you always say we
should stand up for ourselves.
465
00:22:13,265 --> 00:22:17,112
It's a good idea, normally, but
this time you got a big problem.
466
00:22:17,136 --> 00:22:21,082
That guy is free
now, pretty angry,
467
00:22:21,106 --> 00:22:24,219
and still a lot bigger
than you guys.
468
00:22:24,243 --> 00:22:28,791
He's gonna destroy you
guys. This will be great!
469
00:22:28,815 --> 00:22:31,460
You gotta admit this is a
good way of getting back
470
00:22:31,484 --> 00:22:34,229
at people that humiliate you in
public. Don't even think about it.
471
00:22:34,253 --> 00:22:37,165
Nice draw. You thought I was
gonna spray you with this silly string.
472
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:39,368
Yes, I did. Now, put it down.
473
00:22:39,392 --> 00:22:40,969
You put that down first.
474
00:22:40,993 --> 00:22:43,405
OK, we'll put it down together.
475
00:22:43,429 --> 00:22:45,240
On the count of three.
476
00:22:45,264 --> 00:22:47,008
Your shoe's untied.
477
00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:49,500
I know. Aah!
477
00:22:50,305 --> 00:23:50,384
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