1 00:00:00,868 --> 00:00:02,846 Quit nagging me about my driving. 2 00:00:02,870 --> 00:00:05,815 I do not nag. You drive like a maniac. 3 00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:07,817 You do too nag. 4 00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:10,120 And it's not "maniac," it's pronounced "man-iac." 5 00:00:10,144 --> 00:00:13,256 You were going 35 miles an hour. 6 00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:16,793 Whoa! Since when is 35 going fast? 7 00:00:16,817 --> 00:00:19,796 Over speed bumps. 8 00:00:19,820 --> 00:00:23,166 Let me ask you a question. Did your head hit the roof? 9 00:00:23,190 --> 00:00:24,267 No. 10 00:00:24,291 --> 00:00:26,569 Then I could've gone faster. 11 00:00:26,593 --> 00:00:28,838 Mark, would you please go and get all that stuff 12 00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:31,808 that flew all over the back of the station wagon? 13 00:00:31,832 --> 00:00:33,477 OK, Mom. 14 00:00:33,501 --> 00:00:35,512 Yeah. Well, that's the last time you drive. 15 00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:38,882 I swear, when we went over that bump, I heard something crack. 16 00:00:38,906 --> 00:00:41,151 That was just the sound of the car enjoying itself. 17 00:00:41,175 --> 00:00:43,220 No, that was the sound of you 18 00:00:43,244 --> 00:00:46,023 enjoying racing that guy to the parking-lot exit. 19 00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:48,525 You always turn driving into a competition. 20 00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:51,194 I do not. Yes, you do. Yes, you do. 21 00:00:51,218 --> 00:00:53,863 Remember the other day, that 17-year-old pulled up in that Camaro, 22 00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:56,733 and you got that stupid look on your face? 23 00:00:56,757 --> 00:00:59,236 Which stupid look? 24 00:00:59,260 --> 00:01:02,805 One of your stupider ones. You know, that one where you curl your lip up like this 25 00:01:02,829 --> 00:01:06,009 and you go like that cocky head-roll thing. 26 00:01:06,033 --> 00:01:07,677 That's my Elvis. 27 00:01:07,701 --> 00:01:09,879 You can't beat the king, man. You can't beat the king. 28 00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:12,682 Well, my little hound dog, you drive your car the way you want. 29 00:01:12,706 --> 00:01:14,484 Don't ruin my beautiful station wagon. 30 00:01:14,508 --> 00:01:16,153 "My station wagon"? 31 00:01:16,177 --> 00:01:18,488 Yes. That's where we're different. 32 00:01:18,512 --> 00:01:20,857 I think of everything around this house as ours. 33 00:01:20,881 --> 00:01:23,093 Well, what about the tools? 34 00:01:23,117 --> 00:01:26,085 They're ours. I just don't want you touching them. 35 00:01:28,389 --> 00:01:31,034 Dad, there's a big black puddle under Mom's car. 36 00:01:31,058 --> 00:01:33,270 Oh, no. That doesn't mean it's a bad thing. 37 00:01:33,294 --> 00:01:35,138 We could have struck oil. 38 00:01:35,162 --> 00:01:37,402 It's a gusher. We're rich! Let's take a look. 39 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:45,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 40 00:02:45,599 --> 00:02:47,866 What do you think? Could we put the kids in the middle? 41 00:02:50,771 --> 00:02:52,616 (doorbell rings) Hey, Mom. 42 00:02:52,640 --> 00:02:54,373 Hi. I'll get it. 43 00:02:58,279 --> 00:03:00,457 Hi, Mrs. Taylor. Hi, Jennifer. Come on in. 44 00:03:00,481 --> 00:03:04,361 Brad! Jennifer's here. 45 00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:05,995 This is my goldfish Howard. 46 00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:10,099 Oh, so this is the Howard Brad is gonna baby-sit. 47 00:03:10,123 --> 00:03:12,424 Hi, Howard. Did you bring a leash? 48 00:03:14,228 --> 00:03:15,905 Hi, Bradley. This is Howard. 49 00:03:15,929 --> 00:03:18,141 Hey, how's it going, Howard? 50 00:03:18,165 --> 00:03:21,010 You have to feed him twice a day and keep him in a well-lit area. 51 00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:24,369 No problem. That's how we take care of Mark. 52 00:03:26,106 --> 00:03:28,485 I'll only be gone three days, 53 00:03:28,509 --> 00:03:31,754 but I'll really miss you. 54 00:03:31,778 --> 00:03:33,756 Uh-huh. 55 00:03:33,780 --> 00:03:36,315 Aren't you gonna miss me? 56 00:03:41,322 --> 00:03:42,499 Uh-huh. 57 00:03:42,523 --> 00:03:44,334 Well, don't you want to say it? 58 00:03:44,358 --> 00:03:46,225 Uh-uh. 59 00:03:48,529 --> 00:03:51,308 Bye. 60 00:03:51,332 --> 00:03:54,877 Hi, Jennifer. Bye, Jennifer. Bye, Mr. Taylor. 61 00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:58,303 Brad, I'm going back up to our room. Will you miss me? 62 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,918 No running in the house. 63 00:04:01,942 --> 00:04:04,387 Hey, listen to her. Stop that. 64 00:04:04,411 --> 00:04:06,656 Come on. Hey! Hey! Stop it. 65 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,391 Hey, what is all this stuff? 66 00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:11,194 I thought that you were just gonna go buy me an oil pan thing. 67 00:04:11,218 --> 00:04:14,831 Why stop there? Mark, show your mother what we got. 68 00:04:14,855 --> 00:04:16,466 New shock absorbers. 69 00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:18,268 Not ordinary shock absorbers. 70 00:04:18,292 --> 00:04:22,505 Binford's best nitrogen-filled shock absorbers. 71 00:04:22,529 --> 00:04:24,674 They use these in all the off-the-road competitions. 72 00:04:24,698 --> 00:04:27,677 Tim, I don't intend to drive my car off the road. 73 00:04:27,701 --> 00:04:29,011 Well, you can now. 74 00:04:29,035 --> 00:04:31,615 Do you want to help me put these on? Sure. 75 00:04:31,639 --> 00:04:34,016 All right. Mark, go change your clothes first. 76 00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:36,686 I'll meet you under the car in ten minutes. OK, Dad. 77 00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:39,222 Do you have any love letters there for me? 78 00:04:39,246 --> 00:04:43,360 Nope. I got one for me. From Damon's Hardware. 79 00:04:43,384 --> 00:04:46,630 "Dear valued customer." 80 00:04:46,654 --> 00:04:49,098 That's me - valued, beloved, loyal. 81 00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:52,502 Catalog, coupon... 82 00:04:52,526 --> 00:04:54,893 Smells like a pork sandwich. Must be from your mom. 83 00:04:56,930 --> 00:05:00,677 Catalog, bank... Thank you. 84 00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:03,680 Bank... Bank? If that's from the bank, why is my name not on there? 85 00:05:03,704 --> 00:05:05,749 It's not for you. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 86 00:05:05,773 --> 00:05:10,787 Hey! Hey! It is a federal offense to open somebody else's mail. 87 00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,377 I wasn't gonna open it. 88 00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:17,827 "Jill Taylor, this is your new checking-account sta-state..." 89 00:05:17,851 --> 00:05:20,397 ment. You opened your own checking account? 90 00:05:20,421 --> 00:05:22,499 Yes, I did. Do you have a problem with that? 91 00:05:22,523 --> 00:05:25,435 No, I don't have a problem with that. 92 00:05:25,459 --> 00:05:28,538 My wife's sneaking behind my back, stockpiling money. 93 00:05:28,562 --> 00:05:30,239 Why did you open your own checking account? 94 00:05:30,263 --> 00:05:33,242 Well, you know, I'm working now and I have a little money 95 00:05:33,266 --> 00:05:37,046 and just thought this would be sort of, like, mine. 96 00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:40,249 Great. I've been working for 15 years, 97 00:05:40,273 --> 00:05:43,486 so that means the money in our joint checking account can be sort of, like, 98 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:44,821 mine! 99 00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:48,625 No, no, no. That will still be ours. 100 00:05:48,649 --> 00:05:50,460 How silly of me! 101 00:05:50,484 --> 00:05:53,663 The money I make, we both spend. The money you make, you spend. 102 00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:55,332 Now you got it. 103 00:05:55,356 --> 00:05:57,667 (growls) I don't like that one bit. 104 00:05:57,691 --> 00:05:59,703 But I can spend it on you. 105 00:05:59,727 --> 00:06:00,970 (makes monkey noise) 106 00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:03,340 Yeah. See? 107 00:06:03,364 --> 00:06:06,909 See, back in the old days, when I wanted to buy you a birthday present 108 00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:10,447 and I had to write a check for it, I always felt that I was spending your money. 109 00:06:10,471 --> 00:06:11,481 Yeah. 110 00:06:11,505 --> 00:06:13,850 But now, I'm spending my own money. 111 00:06:13,874 --> 00:06:16,419 So this isn't really like just a checking account, per se. 112 00:06:16,443 --> 00:06:19,255 It's more like a Tim Taylor birthday account. 113 00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:21,346 That's a good way for you to look at it. 114 00:06:24,184 --> 00:06:26,629 What are you doing? 115 00:06:26,653 --> 00:06:29,532 Remember when Jennifer told me to keep the bowl well-lit? 116 00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:33,258 I think I moved the bowl a little too close to the desk lamp. 117 00:06:37,297 --> 00:06:38,475 Well, that was smart. 118 00:06:38,499 --> 00:06:41,165 What'd you think, he wanted to read in bed? 119 00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:45,415 I didn't know the water would get that hot. 120 00:06:45,439 --> 00:06:48,385 Just take him out and see if he flops around. 121 00:06:48,409 --> 00:06:51,743 No way. The only slimy thing I touch is you. 122 00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:07,058 One, two, three. He's fried. 123 00:07:12,299 --> 00:07:15,767 Oh, man. What am I gonna do? 124 00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:20,650 Hey, I know. 125 00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:23,486 You can buy her a fish that looks exactly like him. 126 00:07:23,510 --> 00:07:25,755 Yeah, great idea. 127 00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:28,291 Let's go to the pet store. 128 00:07:28,315 --> 00:07:30,927 What are you bringing that for? 129 00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:33,663 Well, we need to bring him along to compare. 130 00:07:33,687 --> 00:07:36,822 Well, it's not like he needs the bowl. 131 00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:55,452 (Mark) Dad, when's the hot rod coming back? 132 00:07:55,476 --> 00:07:57,620 Uh, as soon as we get it back from Dave's shop. 133 00:07:57,644 --> 00:08:01,057 He's aligning the front end and trying to fix the rumble seat for me. 134 00:08:01,081 --> 00:08:03,059 Did you put oil on the gasket there? 135 00:08:03,083 --> 00:08:04,327 Yep. 136 00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:07,764 All right. My son's going to be a mechanic. 137 00:08:07,788 --> 00:08:10,032 No. I'm gonna be a racecar driver. 138 00:08:10,056 --> 00:08:14,526 Oh, ho-ho-ho! My chest is swelling. 139 00:08:16,096 --> 00:08:19,275 All right, under the car. Man territory. 140 00:08:19,299 --> 00:08:23,012 The beauty's up top. This is where the power is, son. 141 00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:25,682 Mom wasn't happy that you did this to her car. 142 00:08:25,706 --> 00:08:27,684 Well, actually, it's our car. 143 00:08:27,708 --> 00:08:29,919 But Mom drives it. 144 00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:32,722 Yeah, but I paid for it, I restored it, so... 145 00:08:32,746 --> 00:08:35,446 So it's really yours? Well, technically, yeah. 146 00:08:36,917 --> 00:08:38,094 Is that right? 147 00:08:38,118 --> 00:08:40,630 Ow! 148 00:08:40,654 --> 00:08:43,099 Ow. Ow. 149 00:08:43,123 --> 00:08:46,703 So, technically, this is your car? 150 00:08:46,727 --> 00:08:50,039 Technically, I got a mild concussion. 151 00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:52,575 Mark, I need to talk to your father... 152 00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:54,777 I know. I'm gonna go wash my hands. 153 00:08:54,801 --> 00:08:57,146 OK, but leave this. Oh, man. 154 00:08:57,170 --> 00:08:59,448 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 155 00:08:59,472 --> 00:09:02,685 Honey, I think you misheard that. 156 00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:07,657 Maybe I did. I thought that I just heard my husband say 157 00:09:07,681 --> 00:09:11,661 that this is his car because he paid for it. 158 00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:14,753 Well, I know him. I don't think he would've said that. 159 00:09:16,489 --> 00:09:19,235 I know him better than you do, and I think he did. 160 00:09:19,259 --> 00:09:24,774 Look... I think of it as mine not because I paid for it, but because I maintain it. 161 00:09:24,798 --> 00:09:27,209 Well, I maintain the house, 162 00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:30,112 so I guess that would make it mine. 163 00:09:30,136 --> 00:09:32,571 Well, it can't be yours. You didn't pay for it. 164 00:09:35,576 --> 00:09:41,290 So, technically, the house is yours because you paid for it? 165 00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:45,917 Technically. But I don't charge you any rent. I'm kidding! 166 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:52,702 You've just been lying all these years 167 00:09:52,726 --> 00:09:55,538 when you said that everything was ours. 168 00:09:55,562 --> 00:09:57,740 What you really meant was everything was yours, yours, yours. Jill has nothing. 169 00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:00,777 You have my heart, honey. 170 00:10:00,801 --> 00:10:04,213 In your very angry hand. Come on, come on. 171 00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:06,849 Jill, don't get all whipped up about this. 172 00:10:06,873 --> 00:10:10,119 You know, Tim, I have always thought of this house as our home. 173 00:10:10,143 --> 00:10:12,521 It is our home. No, it's not. It's Tim's house. 174 00:10:12,545 --> 00:10:14,857 This is Tim's table. This is Tim's couch. No, it's not. Jill. 175 00:10:14,881 --> 00:10:17,894 All that stuff over there is Tim's. Jill. Jill! 176 00:10:17,918 --> 00:10:20,463 Oh, look! Here's something of mine. These coasters are mine. 177 00:10:20,487 --> 00:10:23,521 Well, actually, didn't Aunt Helen send them to both of us for our wedding? 178 00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,535 (mouths) 179 00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:28,326 Well, here's your half. 180 00:10:30,697 --> 00:10:33,643 Good thing she didn't send us bowling balls. 181 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:36,212 You are such a hypocrite. 182 00:10:36,236 --> 00:10:39,048 Me? I'm not the one sneaking around, opening my own checking account. 183 00:10:39,072 --> 00:10:41,851 Since when is it sneaking around for me to go out in broad daylight 184 00:10:41,875 --> 00:10:43,886 and open an account with my money? 185 00:10:43,910 --> 00:10:45,521 "My money. My money. My..." 186 00:10:45,545 --> 00:10:47,890 Yes. And I need it, because without it, 187 00:10:47,914 --> 00:10:50,960 all I've got are three kids and a couple of coasters. 188 00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:53,763 You act like it's my fault I make all the money and pay for everything around here. 189 00:10:53,787 --> 00:10:55,598 Why don't you just take everything around here? 190 00:10:55,622 --> 00:10:57,466 Why don't you take my checking account, too? 191 00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:59,524 Why do I want that? There's no money in it. 192 00:11:05,231 --> 00:11:06,698 Oh! 193 00:11:11,738 --> 00:11:14,283 I can't believe it. Four different pet stores, 194 00:11:14,307 --> 00:11:17,053 and we couldn't find one that matched Howard's spot. 195 00:11:17,077 --> 00:11:18,721 How was I supposed to know 196 00:11:18,745 --> 00:11:21,190 that there were 20 different types of goldfish? 197 00:11:21,214 --> 00:11:23,192 Jennifer's gonna be really mad 198 00:11:23,216 --> 00:11:25,895 when she sees Howard floating there, dead. 199 00:11:25,919 --> 00:11:30,733 Wait. What if he's not floating? What? 200 00:11:30,757 --> 00:11:34,137 What if we took a very tiny ball bearing and stuck it in his mouth? 201 00:11:34,161 --> 00:11:38,741 He'll sink to the bottom. She'll think he's alive. 202 00:11:38,765 --> 00:11:41,243 Yeah. Then she'll take him home and think she killed him. 203 00:11:41,267 --> 00:11:42,311 Right. 204 00:11:42,335 --> 00:11:44,102 Cool. 205 00:11:55,816 --> 00:11:57,794 You over there, Wilson? 206 00:11:57,818 --> 00:12:01,853 Down here, good neighbor. (exhales) 207 00:12:06,793 --> 00:12:08,771 Are you making a snow angel? 208 00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:10,472 Well, I guess I am, neighbor. 209 00:12:10,496 --> 00:12:12,575 But, actually, 210 00:12:12,599 --> 00:12:16,645 I'm preparing for my annual snowshoe expedition through the Upper Peninsula, 211 00:12:16,669 --> 00:12:21,517 and I'm just making sure that my long johns stay toasty and dry. 212 00:12:21,541 --> 00:12:26,589 Whoa! Tim, I think I've found a spot that is not quite waterproof. 213 00:12:26,613 --> 00:12:28,891 Can I ask you a question? 214 00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:30,659 Hop on my sled, neighbor. 215 00:12:30,683 --> 00:12:32,862 Jill and I got in this bad argument. 216 00:12:32,886 --> 00:12:35,297 Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 217 00:12:35,321 --> 00:12:39,135 She says that I think I own everything in the house. 218 00:12:39,159 --> 00:12:40,937 Hmm. Well, do you think that, Tim? 219 00:12:40,961 --> 00:12:42,872 No, we own everything together. 50-50. 220 00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:44,207 Tim. 221 00:12:44,231 --> 00:12:46,475 I-I guess I... 222 00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:49,511 To be honest, I do kind of feel like I own everything. 223 00:12:49,535 --> 00:12:52,581 Well, Tim, you wouldn't have that problem if you were a Modoc. 224 00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:55,451 A who-doc? 225 00:12:55,475 --> 00:12:57,954 Tim, I'm talking about the Modoc Indian tribe. 226 00:12:57,978 --> 00:13:01,858 In their native tongue, they have no word for "yours" or "mine," 227 00:13:01,882 --> 00:13:03,626 only one word... 228 00:13:03,650 --> 00:13:05,327 for "ours." 229 00:13:05,351 --> 00:13:09,031 Each man's material possession belongs to the whole tribe. 230 00:13:09,055 --> 00:13:13,269 Ooh, must be difficult when it comes to underwear. 231 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:15,972 You see, Tim, in the 20th century, 232 00:13:15,996 --> 00:13:19,375 our culture tends to measure a man's worth by his possessions. 233 00:13:19,399 --> 00:13:22,211 And I got some cool stuff, too. 234 00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:23,946 That gives you a feeling of power, doesn't it? 235 00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:26,215 Oh, you bet... And control over your life. 236 00:13:26,239 --> 00:13:28,317 Oh, control, ha-ha. 237 00:13:28,341 --> 00:13:29,952 And control over your mate. 238 00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:32,288 Yeah, but... 239 00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:33,444 Oh, yeah. I... 240 00:13:35,581 --> 00:13:39,495 You're saying that I want to own everything so I can control Jill? 241 00:13:39,519 --> 00:13:41,697 Well, Tim, if you own everything, 242 00:13:41,721 --> 00:13:43,788 you have all the power. 243 00:13:46,592 --> 00:13:51,107 Whoa, Tim! I feel an icy blast moving up my hindquarters. 244 00:13:51,131 --> 00:13:53,691 Best go in and do a little bit of waterproofing. 245 00:13:55,802 --> 00:13:59,148 And now for the point I've really been waiting for - the heavy-duty sanding. 246 00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,850 And for heavy-duty sanding, 247 00:14:00,874 --> 00:14:02,807 we're gonna need a very special tool. Lisa? 248 00:14:05,879 --> 00:14:07,523 Here you go, Tim. 249 00:14:07,547 --> 00:14:09,959 What do you got there? 250 00:14:09,983 --> 00:14:13,062 Oh, it's a 2100 model electric drum sander. 251 00:14:13,086 --> 00:14:15,597 That's right. Four-and-a-half horsepower patented stabilizer. 252 00:14:15,621 --> 00:14:18,422 Not to mention full swiveling trailing-wire support. 253 00:14:21,694 --> 00:14:24,540 Almost more than a man can take. Oh-oh. 254 00:14:24,564 --> 00:14:26,508 Thank you. You're welcome. 255 00:14:26,532 --> 00:14:28,344 You might also wanna mention, Tim, 256 00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:30,713 that this particular sander weighs over 240 pounds. 257 00:14:30,737 --> 00:14:32,337 Could you help me with the...? 258 00:14:34,741 --> 00:14:40,156 Put an apron on there, we'll call it "Al's mom." 259 00:14:40,180 --> 00:14:42,191 Now, because of the weight 260 00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:44,793 and the nature of the wood surface, in our case, pine, 261 00:14:44,817 --> 00:14:48,965 I would suggest going with the 2400 RPMs as opposed to the 28. 262 00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:50,900 Thanks for sharing that, Al. 263 00:14:50,924 --> 00:14:53,569 But I think I'm gonna go with 4200 RPM. 264 00:14:53,593 --> 00:14:56,305 Well, Tim, it doesn't go up to 4200. 265 00:14:56,329 --> 00:15:00,109 Does now, my stout little friend. 266 00:15:00,133 --> 00:15:01,133 I rewired it. 267 00:15:03,536 --> 00:15:06,916 Now, when going with a plank floor like this, you want to go with the grain. 268 00:15:06,940 --> 00:15:08,873 (switches on sander) 269 00:15:25,658 --> 00:15:27,736 On first glance, 270 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:30,128 this might seem like I screwed up. 271 00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:35,711 But I've actually done this to prove an important point. 272 00:15:35,735 --> 00:15:39,215 That you know absolutely nothing about sanders? 273 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,651 No. 274 00:15:42,675 --> 00:15:45,654 That too much power is not always a good thing. 275 00:15:45,678 --> 00:15:49,525 And I know what you're asking. What kind of power is he talking about? 276 00:15:49,549 --> 00:15:51,193 I know I am. 277 00:15:51,217 --> 00:15:54,063 Well, I'm not talking about the kind of power you plug in. 278 00:15:54,087 --> 00:15:56,232 I'm talking about the power of ownership. 279 00:15:56,256 --> 00:16:00,002 Too often in our lives, we give too much value to our possessions, 280 00:16:00,026 --> 00:16:01,370 like the sander here. 281 00:16:01,394 --> 00:16:03,539 Actually, Tim, this sander was a rental. 282 00:16:03,563 --> 00:16:05,607 Whatever, Al. 283 00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:08,266 We can kiss that security deposit goodbye. 284 00:16:10,070 --> 00:16:13,983 I'm glad I put it on your credit card. 285 00:16:14,007 --> 00:16:14,984 My credit card? 286 00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:17,153 Let it go, Al. 287 00:16:17,177 --> 00:16:19,721 In relationships, you've gotta be equal. 288 00:16:19,745 --> 00:16:21,824 Share things equally, no matter who makes the money. 289 00:16:21,848 --> 00:16:24,893 'Cause Al and I have a good relationship. We share. 290 00:16:24,917 --> 00:16:27,751 But I'm no more valuable than Al. I agree. 291 00:16:29,055 --> 00:16:32,101 Even though I make a lot more money, 292 00:16:32,125 --> 00:16:35,204 and I get full medical coverage. 293 00:16:35,228 --> 00:16:36,872 You get full medical? 294 00:16:36,896 --> 00:16:40,609 Sure. But Al and I have learned how to share. 295 00:16:40,633 --> 00:16:43,512 On the job site, there's no difference between Al's tools and my tools. 296 00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:47,016 Actually, Tim, there is. At the end of the job... 297 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:48,184 (clicking) 298 00:16:48,208 --> 00:16:50,141 my tools still work. 299 00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:08,070 Where's Jennifer? 300 00:17:08,094 --> 00:17:09,605 She's not here yet. 301 00:17:09,629 --> 00:17:12,908 Oh, well, I'll bet she's gonna be happy to see Howard. 302 00:17:12,932 --> 00:17:15,966 Howard, did you miss Jennif... Brad. 303 00:17:18,004 --> 00:17:19,982 This fish is not alive. 304 00:17:20,006 --> 00:17:22,218 Yeah, it is. 305 00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:24,987 It's standing up straight. Fish don't do that. 306 00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:29,325 I trained him. Good fish. Keep standing. 307 00:17:29,349 --> 00:17:32,395 Brad, did you kill Howard? 308 00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:34,330 Yes. 309 00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:38,256 If he's dead, why isn't he floating on the top? 310 00:17:42,962 --> 00:17:45,007 I stuck a ball bearing in his mouth. 311 00:17:45,031 --> 00:17:46,942 Oh, Brad! 312 00:17:46,966 --> 00:17:48,210 (doorbell rings) 313 00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:50,746 Mom, that's Jennifer. What am I gonna do? 314 00:17:50,770 --> 00:17:52,781 Well, you're gonna have to tell her the truth. 315 00:17:52,805 --> 00:17:54,850 Spare her the ball-bearing thing. 316 00:17:54,874 --> 00:17:56,318 Oh, man. 317 00:17:56,342 --> 00:17:57,886 Hi, Jennifer. Come on in. 318 00:17:57,910 --> 00:17:59,922 Hi, Jennifer. Did you have a nice trip? 319 00:17:59,946 --> 00:18:02,791 Very nice, Mrs. Taylor. That's good. 320 00:18:02,815 --> 00:18:05,094 Hi, Bradley. Thanks for taking care of Howard. 321 00:18:05,118 --> 00:18:06,828 Oh, he was no trouble. 322 00:18:06,852 --> 00:18:08,786 He slept most of the time. 323 00:18:12,358 --> 00:18:14,092 I'll see you at school Monday. 324 00:18:16,062 --> 00:18:17,606 Brad? 325 00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:19,942 (mouths) 326 00:18:19,966 --> 00:18:21,544 Listen... 327 00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:23,579 Jennifer... 328 00:18:23,603 --> 00:18:27,783 Brad, is there something wrong with Howard? 329 00:18:27,807 --> 00:18:31,520 He's kind of... 330 00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:32,588 dead. 331 00:18:32,612 --> 00:18:34,490 What happened? 332 00:18:34,514 --> 00:18:39,650 Well, let's just say he saw a bright light and went towards it. 333 00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:46,458 Jennifer? 334 00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:49,827 Jennifer? 335 00:18:50,997 --> 00:18:53,976 Look, Jennifer, it was an accident. 336 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:58,680 But all Brad worried about was how you'd feel. 337 00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:01,783 Is that true, Bradley? 338 00:19:01,807 --> 00:19:05,176 He said he'd feel awful if he made you cry. 339 00:19:06,379 --> 00:19:07,659 Really, Bradley? 340 00:19:11,717 --> 00:19:15,653 That's so sweet. I'm really glad you talked to me about this. 341 00:19:20,460 --> 00:19:23,939 Hey, Jennifer, maybe we can find another fish just like Howard. 342 00:19:23,963 --> 00:19:25,396 Good luck. 343 00:19:29,469 --> 00:19:32,814 Well, um... Mom, I'm gonna walk Jennifer home. 344 00:19:32,838 --> 00:19:36,752 Oh, OK. Bye-bye, Jennifer. Bye, Mrs. Taylor. 345 00:19:36,776 --> 00:19:39,488 Randy, that was so cool, the way you stood up for your brother. 346 00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:40,856 Well, Mom, 347 00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:43,747 I kind of broke his Game Boy, so now he won't beat me up. 348 00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:49,598 Hey, pistonhead. 349 00:19:49,622 --> 00:19:51,422 Hey, crankshaft. 350 00:19:53,759 --> 00:19:54,770 Hi. 351 00:19:54,794 --> 00:19:56,372 Hi. 352 00:19:56,396 --> 00:19:57,473 How was your day? 353 00:19:57,497 --> 00:19:58,774 Delightful. 354 00:19:58,798 --> 00:20:00,509 Is that 'cause I wasn't here? 355 00:20:00,533 --> 00:20:01,677 Maybe. 356 00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:04,513 I was talking to Wilson, 357 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:07,049 and I think I know what the trouble is. 358 00:20:07,073 --> 00:20:08,750 We got into an argument 359 00:20:08,774 --> 00:20:12,421 because we tried to define our relationship by our possessions. 360 00:20:12,445 --> 00:20:14,690 I agree. 361 00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:16,091 I think we could learn a lot 362 00:20:16,115 --> 00:20:18,649 from this tribe called the Mopeds. 363 00:20:21,321 --> 00:20:23,465 The Mopeds? 364 00:20:23,489 --> 00:20:27,102 Yeah. It's a tribe that share everything, even their underwear. 365 00:20:27,126 --> 00:20:29,171 Tim, what are you talking about? 366 00:20:29,195 --> 00:20:32,374 Truth is, I... I do judge myself on my possessions 367 00:20:32,398 --> 00:20:35,010 and what I bring into this house. 368 00:20:35,034 --> 00:20:37,946 But you do so much, how do I put a price tag on that? 369 00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:39,548 Try. 370 00:20:39,572 --> 00:20:42,851 Aha. I knew you were gonna say that. 371 00:20:42,875 --> 00:20:45,020 So I figured this out at work today and wrote down what you should've earned, 372 00:20:45,044 --> 00:20:47,022 could I have afforded to pay you, 373 00:20:47,046 --> 00:20:49,592 for all the 12 1/2 years of work you've done around the house. 374 00:20:49,616 --> 00:20:51,860 And, even though I wasn't legally bound to do this, 375 00:20:51,884 --> 00:20:57,299 I threw in a bonus for the pain of childbirth. 376 00:20:57,323 --> 00:21:00,135 That'd better be a big bonus. 377 00:21:00,159 --> 00:21:01,803 Honey, I was there. I know what you went through. 378 00:21:01,827 --> 00:21:02,904 Oh, you do, do you? 379 00:21:02,928 --> 00:21:04,740 Yes. It was painful for me, too. 380 00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:06,542 All that screaming hurt my ears. 381 00:21:06,566 --> 00:21:08,299 Yeah, right. 382 00:21:09,469 --> 00:21:11,813 How much do I get? Listen to this. 383 00:21:11,837 --> 00:21:14,116 580 million dollars and 60 cents. 384 00:21:14,140 --> 00:21:15,150 I rounded it off. 385 00:21:15,174 --> 00:21:17,319 Hand it over. 386 00:21:17,343 --> 00:21:19,555 I'm a little short. 387 00:21:19,579 --> 00:21:21,657 I was kinda hoping I could work some of it off. 388 00:21:21,681 --> 00:21:23,726 How are you gonna do that? 389 00:21:23,750 --> 00:21:26,016 By satisfying every one of your needs. 390 00:21:28,621 --> 00:21:30,954 That'll use up about 20 bucks. 391 00:21:33,826 --> 00:21:36,705 Since you are being so generous, 392 00:21:36,729 --> 00:21:38,907 perhaps I should have my checks reprinted. 393 00:21:38,931 --> 00:21:41,644 No. I was stupid. Have your own checking account. 394 00:21:41,668 --> 00:21:44,246 No, no. I want to, I want to. 395 00:21:44,270 --> 00:21:48,484 It'll be a joint account, equal, 50-50. 396 00:21:48,508 --> 00:21:51,119 Equal? You don't have to do this. Here. How would that look? 397 00:21:51,143 --> 00:21:54,390 You could've left 'em the way... "Mr. and Mrs. Jill Taylor." 398 00:21:54,414 --> 00:21:55,457 Oh-oh-oh-oh! 399 00:21:55,481 --> 00:21:57,848 Oh-oh-oh-oh. 400 00:21:59,151 --> 00:22:00,829 (television plays) 401 00:22:00,853 --> 00:22:02,498 You know, honey, I realized today 402 00:22:02,522 --> 00:22:04,833 we need to order new checks for the old account. 403 00:22:04,857 --> 00:22:08,236 I was thinking maybe we should change the design. 404 00:22:08,260 --> 00:22:10,272 What's the matter with the old one? 405 00:22:10,296 --> 00:22:13,008 I don't know. It's just not us. 406 00:22:13,032 --> 00:22:18,747 I was thinking it'd be nice to have, like, a sunset or some daisies or... 407 00:22:18,771 --> 00:22:21,439 some frolicking bunnies. 408 00:22:23,876 --> 00:22:26,622 I hope you're kidding. Do you expect me to go to the hardware store 409 00:22:26,646 --> 00:22:28,824 and order a nail gun with bunny checks? 410 00:22:28,848 --> 00:22:31,226 (mouths) 411 00:22:31,250 --> 00:22:33,295 Well, what do you want? 412 00:22:33,319 --> 00:22:35,497 Something a little more manly. 413 00:22:35,521 --> 00:22:37,287 Armpit hair, marines... 414 00:22:39,058 --> 00:22:41,269 kidney stones. 415 00:22:41,293 --> 00:22:43,405 I'm sure I'm gonna go to the grocery store 416 00:22:43,429 --> 00:22:46,342 with armpit-hair checks. 417 00:22:46,366 --> 00:22:48,544 What happened to all this compromise, 418 00:22:48,568 --> 00:22:50,579 50-50, what's mine is yours, that stuff? 419 00:22:50,603 --> 00:22:54,405 OK, how about this? A bunny passing a kidney stone. 420 00:22:57,977 --> 00:23:01,289 On the job site, there's no difference between Al's tools and my tools. 421 00:23:01,313 --> 00:23:03,759 Actually, Tim, there is. At the end of the job... 422 00:23:03,783 --> 00:23:05,761 (sander doesn't switch on) 423 00:23:05,785 --> 00:23:07,718 my tools still work. 424 00:23:18,130 --> 00:23:20,290 Good night, everybody. Good night, everybody. 424 00:23:21,305 --> 00:24:21,308 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/8d538 Help other users to choose the best subtitles