1
00:00:04,905 --> 00:00:08,407
Good night, Al.
Good night, Heidi.
2
00:00:09,410 --> 00:00:12,922
Good show tonight,
Al. You think so?
3
00:00:12,946 --> 00:00:15,359
You insulted me 17 times.
4
00:00:15,383 --> 00:00:17,995
You're right. Great show!
5
00:00:18,019 --> 00:00:19,963
Tim. Al.
6
00:00:19,987 --> 00:00:21,999
Hi, Heidi. Hi.
7
00:00:22,023 --> 00:00:25,235
Super episode. Right
up there with Vila.
8
00:00:25,259 --> 00:00:30,007
Thanks, Wes. Thank
you, President Davidson.
9
00:00:30,031 --> 00:00:34,011
He's president of Binford
Tools, not the United States, Al.
10
00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:35,512
So how are my
friends at Tool Time?
11
00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:39,649
Beats me. I don't
think you have any.
12
00:00:39,673 --> 00:00:43,220
You know, Tim, you're as funny now
as when we first started selling tools.
13
00:00:43,244 --> 00:00:44,821
I remember that.
14
00:00:44,845 --> 00:00:49,259
You know, Wes here was Binford's
best number-two tool salesman.
15
00:00:49,283 --> 00:00:51,170
Boy, I can't remember
the guy's name that was
16
00:00:51,194 --> 00:00:53,063
number one. Who was
the number-one salesman?
17
00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:55,032
It was you, Tim. Was it me?
18
00:00:55,056 --> 00:00:57,467
But we all know who's
number one now, don't we?
19
00:00:57,491 --> 00:00:59,702
Yes, we do, Mr. President.
20
00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:03,106
Al, I really enjoyed the
"What's New" segment,
21
00:01:03,130 --> 00:01:05,409
and it started my little
gray cells churning.
22
00:01:05,433 --> 00:01:07,744
Mm-hm? Seems like it churned
the hair right off your head.
23
00:01:07,768 --> 00:01:09,712
Hey! Hey.
24
00:01:09,736 --> 00:01:12,449
The hair's off-limits, Taylor.
25
00:01:12,473 --> 00:01:15,052
It's off your scalp, too.
26
00:01:15,076 --> 00:01:16,753
Anyway...
27
00:01:16,777 --> 00:01:20,490
we just finished the prototype
for a new reciprocating saw.
28
00:01:20,514 --> 00:01:22,492
I didn't know we were developing
one. You didn't know I'd be
29
00:01:22,516 --> 00:01:27,730
your boss one day either.
Gentlemen, the Binford 6100,
30
00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:30,633
with state-of-the-art
electronic feedback control.
31
00:01:30,657 --> 00:01:33,170
(grunts) Oh, I love
that in a saw! Boy.
32
00:01:33,194 --> 00:01:35,805
Look how thin she
is. And she's light.
33
00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:39,443
And look at this, there's
a pistol grip. Down, boy!
34
00:01:39,467 --> 00:01:41,452
I thought it would
be perfect if you could
35
00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:43,580
give it a sneak preview
on Friday's segment.
36
00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:45,415
That's a very good idea.
37
00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:47,551
We can see now why
you're number one.
38
00:01:47,575 --> 00:01:50,087
Thanks, Al.
39
00:01:50,111 --> 00:01:52,355
Well, back to work.
40
00:01:52,379 --> 00:01:54,591
Bye, Al. See you, Timmy.
41
00:01:54,615 --> 00:01:59,662
So long, Wessy. See
you, Mr. President.
42
00:01:59,686 --> 00:02:03,288
Why don't you just
glue your lips to his butt?
43
00:02:10,097 --> 00:02:12,742
There's no need to be snitty.
44
00:02:12,766 --> 00:02:15,345
Besides, I think you're overlooking
something very important
45
00:02:15,369 --> 00:02:18,014
that has just happened here.
46
00:02:18,038 --> 00:02:21,806
(both) We got a new tool!
47
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:29,074
Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org
48
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:42,265
There's nothing
to eat in this house.
49
00:03:42,289 --> 00:03:44,901
Hey, Randy.
What's in the pantry?
50
00:03:44,925 --> 00:03:49,972
We got some garlic
powder, nutmeg and fennel.
51
00:03:49,996 --> 00:03:52,375
What's fennel?
52
00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:55,612
That's what Al's
shirts are made of.
53
00:03:55,636 --> 00:03:59,148
Hey, guys, are you
here? (Brad) Yeah.
54
00:03:59,172 --> 00:04:03,052
Oh, I'm so sorry
I'm late. What a day!
55
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:05,021
The computers all
went down at work,
56
00:04:05,045 --> 00:04:08,024
and then I had a library fundraiser
meeting, and I got this headache -
57
00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:11,461
I thought my head
was going to explode.
58
00:04:11,485 --> 00:04:14,231
Mom, we're
completely out of food.
59
00:04:14,255 --> 00:04:17,334
Thank you for caring.
60
00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:18,833
You father and I just
went to the grocery
61
00:04:18,857 --> 00:04:20,503
store two days ago. How
can there be no food?
62
00:04:20,527 --> 00:04:23,707
There's no food!
63
00:04:23,731 --> 00:04:28,678
Gosh! You guys are just
like piranhas in blue jeans.
64
00:04:28,702 --> 00:04:33,483
OK, I'll order a pizza for tonight.
Tomorrow I'll go to the grocery store.
65
00:04:33,507 --> 00:04:36,786
Can you make sure the food is here
by the time we get home from school?
66
00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:38,988
Why don't I just meet
you at the bus stop?
67
00:04:39,012 --> 00:04:42,091
I can serve you as you get off.
68
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:44,994
You're always thinking, Mom.
69
00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:48,231
Here's what I'm thinking:
70
00:04:48,255 --> 00:04:50,467
tomorrow I'm gonna give
you boys some money.
71
00:04:50,491 --> 00:04:54,571
Yeah! Money! I'm gonna
send you to the grocery store.
72
00:04:54,595 --> 00:04:56,973
You're gonna buy everything
I tell you to - nothing else.
73
00:04:56,997 --> 00:04:58,742
Oh, man!
74
00:04:58,766 --> 00:05:01,478
And when I say potatoes
I don't mean potato chips.
75
00:05:01,502 --> 00:05:04,947
And milk does not
mean Milk Duds, OK?
76
00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:07,850
Can we at least get
something sweet?
77
00:05:07,874 --> 00:05:11,621
You could buy me some
flowers - that'd be sweet.
78
00:05:11,645 --> 00:05:14,223
Hi, everybody. Oh, hi.
79
00:05:14,247 --> 00:05:17,727
How is the best gosh-darn
family in the whole world?
80
00:05:17,751 --> 00:05:21,531
You got a new tool,
didn't you? (grunts) Yeah!
81
00:05:21,555 --> 00:05:24,066
Binford's coming
out with a new saw.
82
00:05:24,090 --> 00:05:27,069
I get to promote it on the show.
Tonight I get to try it out in the garage -
83
00:05:27,093 --> 00:05:29,005
if you'll help move
the hot rod chassis out.
84
00:05:29,029 --> 00:05:31,174
Is it a power saw? You bet.
85
00:05:31,198 --> 00:05:34,366
I'll get the candles.
I'll get the Band-Aids.
86
00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:47,023
Honey, are you still here?
It's two in the morning.
87
00:05:47,047 --> 00:05:49,659
Come over here,
Jill. Look at this.
88
00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:52,195
Know what I found out
when I took this apart?
89
00:05:52,219 --> 00:05:56,232
That you couldn't
put it back together?
90
00:05:56,256 --> 00:05:58,635
This is an inferior tool.
91
00:05:58,659 --> 00:06:00,496
I'm embarrassed to
have it in the garage
92
00:06:00,520 --> 00:06:02,706
breathing the same air
as the rest of my stuff.
93
00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:07,410
Honey, I know they're like
little people to you, but get a grip.
94
00:06:07,434 --> 00:06:10,513
No, no, no. Look
at these washers.
95
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:14,283
These are plastic
washers, plastic screws.
96
00:06:14,307 --> 00:06:16,653
I knew this'd happen
when Davidson took over.
97
00:06:16,677 --> 00:06:19,121
He doesn't care about
quality the way I do.
98
00:06:19,145 --> 00:06:23,181
No kidding. I saw his
wife at a Christmas party.
99
00:06:26,286 --> 00:06:29,799
Binford would have
never made a tool like this.
100
00:06:29,823 --> 00:06:32,935
The length of the stroke
isn't even half an inch.
101
00:06:32,959 --> 00:06:38,140
Well, that may be obvious
to you and me, but...
102
00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:41,878
Davidson may not know
that this is a bad tool.
103
00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:44,681
How could he not
know this is a bad tool?
104
00:06:44,705 --> 00:06:48,251
He's been sitting behind
a desk for ten years.
105
00:06:48,275 --> 00:06:52,188
You're right. Even when we
were selling tools together -
106
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:56,180
- get this, he didn't know the difference
between a spline shank and a two-flute.
107
00:06:58,184 --> 00:07:00,963
That was exactly my reaction.
108
00:07:00,987 --> 00:07:03,733
Honey, if you tell him
that this is a bad tool,
109
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:05,602
he may not want
you to promote it.
110
00:07:05,626 --> 00:07:08,170
You think so? Yeah.
You should go talk to him.
111
00:07:08,194 --> 00:07:11,274
Maybe you're right.
I'm always right.
112
00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:15,278
Why is that?
'Cause I'm so smart.
113
00:07:15,302 --> 00:07:18,815
If you're so smart,
Mrs. Magna Cum Lately,
114
00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:21,885
why don't you help
me put it back together.
115
00:07:21,909 --> 00:07:23,787
Absolutely not.
116
00:07:23,811 --> 00:07:26,578
See, I'm getting
smarter all the time.
117
00:07:27,581 --> 00:07:30,927
Well, here we are. Have a seat.
118
00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:33,229
Mr. Davidson will
be with you shortly.
119
00:07:33,253 --> 00:07:34,997
Thanks, Laura.
120
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:38,601
Oh, by the way, Al, all of
us here at Binford love you.
121
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:42,171
I bet we both have a
lot of fans around here.
122
00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:46,297
Well, like I said, Mr. Davidson
will be with you shortly.
123
00:07:53,774 --> 00:07:56,118
Why did we have to come here?
124
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:58,788
You know I'm not good
at confronting superiors.
125
00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:00,657
Al, you got to speak up.
126
00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:04,794
If a kiss-up like you has a
complaint, he'll take it seriously.
127
00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:09,187
Hi, guys. Sorry I'm
late. Hello, Mr. President.
128
00:08:11,592 --> 00:08:15,494
Comfortable, Tim? How can I
not be? It's so homey in here.
129
00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:21,344
How are you guys?
You want anything?
130
00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:23,869
We want you to scrap
production on the 6100.
131
00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:28,785
I was thinking more along
the lines of coffee or tea.
132
00:08:28,809 --> 00:08:31,877
It's an inferior tool.
Both Al and I agree.
133
00:08:33,246 --> 00:08:34,880
Is this true, Al?
134
00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:46,736
I would like some tea.
135
00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:49,405
The point is I took
it home last night
136
00:08:49,429 --> 00:08:51,307
and fiddled around with
it. Al tried it this morning.
137
00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:53,142
The motor's really
too small, Wes.
138
00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:56,913
There's all those
plastic parts in it.
139
00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:59,883
Do you have chamomile?
140
00:08:59,907 --> 00:09:02,184
The whole thing is
cheesy and lightweight.
141
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:06,022
We feel that the lighter weight
parts make it easier to use.
142
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:08,992
Particularly for the
ladies. The ladies?
143
00:09:09,016 --> 00:09:10,593
My wife was just
remarking the other night,
144
00:09:10,617 --> 00:09:12,996
"When are they gonna make
a reciprocating saw for me?
145
00:09:13,020 --> 00:09:15,832
"Something small you can put in a cocktail
purse. Or maybe hang it like a pendant.
146
00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:18,034
Maybe some drop
earrings out of it."
147
00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:21,671
With all due respect,
Mr. President, I... I did try it.
148
00:09:21,695 --> 00:09:26,175
And I felt that it wasn't up to
Binford's usually high standards.
149
00:09:26,199 --> 00:09:30,780
Al, it's a perfectly fine tool.
We just found some new,
150
00:09:30,804 --> 00:09:33,149
innovative
manufacturing techniques.
151
00:09:33,173 --> 00:09:36,986
Don't you mean you found a
cheaper way to make it, Wes?
152
00:09:37,010 --> 00:09:39,055
All right, forget
all this stuff, OK?
153
00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:42,491
The basic design is there. With
modifications, we got a great tool.
154
00:09:42,515 --> 00:09:44,160
All you need is
a heavier casing,
155
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:46,029
go from plastic to
metal washers...
156
00:09:46,053 --> 00:09:49,298
Guys! I'm happy
with the saw as is.
157
00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:55,259
Fine. Let's just see how happy you are
when we will not promote it on Tool Time.
158
00:09:56,663 --> 00:09:58,507
Tim, it's very simple.
159
00:09:58,531 --> 00:10:00,142
(hits hole in one)
160
00:10:00,166 --> 00:10:04,814
Binford makes tools.
Binford makes Tool Time.
161
00:10:04,838 --> 00:10:07,817
Your point? If the show
won't promote our products,
162
00:10:07,841 --> 00:10:12,354
we have no reason continue
it. At least, not with you.
163
00:10:12,378 --> 00:10:15,246
Don't threaten me, Wes.
164
00:10:19,252 --> 00:10:20,752
Al?
165
00:10:24,324 --> 00:10:27,726
You can cancel my tea... sir.
166
00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:34,176
Mom, we're back! We
got everything on the list.
167
00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:35,478
(Jill) Everything?
168
00:10:35,502 --> 00:10:37,546
Everything except
the garlic gloves.
169
00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:39,716
Garlic gloves?
170
00:10:39,740 --> 00:10:42,986
That's garlic cloves, honey.
171
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:47,311
Oh. Then we had Mark
smelling gloves for nothing.
172
00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:51,260
Uh-oh! What is all this stuff?
173
00:10:51,284 --> 00:10:54,463
There's licorice here, potato
chips, chocolate-covered peanuts.
174
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,132
These things
were not on the list.
175
00:10:56,156 --> 00:10:59,168
We bought it with the
money we had left over.
176
00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:02,105
You shouldn't have
had any money left over.
177
00:11:02,129 --> 00:11:05,374
We're smart shoppers. Yeah.
178
00:11:05,398 --> 00:11:08,177
This fruit is bruised.
179
00:11:08,201 --> 00:11:10,312
The crackers are smushed.
180
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:13,016
What's with this can
of spaghetti sauce?
181
00:11:13,040 --> 00:11:16,352
Mom, it was half the
price 'cause it was dented.
182
00:11:16,376 --> 00:11:19,622
Great. We can have
spaghetti al dente.
183
00:11:19,646 --> 00:11:21,691
That's a good idea.
184
00:11:21,715 --> 00:11:23,660
Did you buy anything
that wasn't damaged?
185
00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:27,830
Yeah, the chicken. We
couldn't find any dented ones.
186
00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:31,433
Why didn't you just throw it up against
the wall before you got to the register?
187
00:11:31,457 --> 00:11:35,204
See, Randy? I told
you we should do that.
188
00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:39,042
Well, thanks for trying.
189
00:11:39,066 --> 00:11:40,910
Hi, everybody.
190
00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:43,001
Back from shopping. How'd it go?
191
00:11:45,706 --> 00:11:49,385
There's no labels on these.
192
00:11:49,409 --> 00:11:53,189
What is it? It could be
succotash or dog food.
193
00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:57,126
With the way Mom cooks, I
don't think it makes a difference.
194
00:11:57,150 --> 00:12:00,118
(Jill) I heard that!
195
00:12:02,823 --> 00:12:05,101
So how'd it go with
Davidson? Huh!
196
00:12:05,125 --> 00:12:08,871
You know what they say,
honey. A weasel is a weasel...
197
00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:11,174
is a weasel!
198
00:12:11,198 --> 00:12:13,042
That good, huh?
199
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:17,313
I guess the bottom line is, I either
promote the tool or he fires me.
200
00:12:17,337 --> 00:12:18,647
What?
201
00:12:18,671 --> 00:12:21,017
I don't think he can hurt
"The Tool Man" Tim Taylor.
202
00:12:21,041 --> 00:12:24,453
He's the president of the company.
He has the power to fire you.
203
00:12:24,477 --> 00:12:27,156
Who's he gonna replace
me with? Borland?
204
00:12:27,180 --> 00:12:32,661
Al's show now? Flannel
Time? Who's gonna watch that?
205
00:12:32,685 --> 00:12:35,031
OK, tell me about
this tool. Does it work?
206
00:12:35,055 --> 00:12:38,000
It works.
207
00:12:38,024 --> 00:12:39,535
Is it unsafe?
208
00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:41,704
No, it's not unsafe,
but this isn't the point.
209
00:12:41,728 --> 00:12:43,940
Is this really about the tool?
210
00:12:43,964 --> 00:12:45,808
Or is it about your
problem with Davidson?
211
00:12:45,832 --> 00:12:48,144
I don't have a
problem with Davidson.
212
00:12:48,168 --> 00:12:49,846
You think he's a weasel.
213
00:12:49,870 --> 00:12:51,981
I don't have a
problem with that.
214
00:12:52,005 --> 00:12:56,552
OK, if it's not about
Davidson and the tool is safe.
215
00:12:56,576 --> 00:12:59,622
Are you really willing to
lose your job over this?
216
00:12:59,646 --> 00:13:03,659
Binford has always
stood for quality tools.
217
00:13:03,683 --> 00:13:05,762
This is a bad reciprocating saw.
218
00:13:05,786 --> 00:13:09,031
What's next? A rubber
miter box? Styrofoam nails?
219
00:13:09,055 --> 00:13:12,034
Is there no way you
can compromise? Jill...
220
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:15,337
a lot of guys watch the show and buy tools
because I recommend them on the show.
221
00:13:15,361 --> 00:13:17,441
It's a responsibility
I don't take lightly.
222
00:13:19,766 --> 00:13:22,311
All right. "All right" what?
223
00:13:22,335 --> 00:13:26,015
All right, I'm behind you -
whatever you decide to do.
224
00:13:26,039 --> 00:13:29,051
Even if I lose my job and I've gotta
go back on selling tools on the road?
225
00:13:29,075 --> 00:13:32,155
I won't see you, but
I'll be behind you.
226
00:13:32,179 --> 00:13:34,679
That's why I love you.
227
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,461
And you don't think I'm crazy?
228
00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:42,287
That's a separate issue.
229
00:13:48,628 --> 00:13:52,141
Hey, Dad, remember the landing
gear you fixed on my plane yesterday?
230
00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:53,575
Did a good job, didn't I?
231
00:13:53,599 --> 00:13:55,812
I guess the glue didn't work.
232
00:13:55,836 --> 00:14:00,504
Oh. I can't figure that out my thumb was
stuck to the work bench for three hours.
233
00:14:01,908 --> 00:14:04,275
Well, I'll fix it again.
234
00:14:06,313 --> 00:14:08,925
You like me being Tim "The
Tool Man" Taylor, don't you?
235
00:14:08,949 --> 00:14:10,592
Yeah!
236
00:14:10,616 --> 00:14:12,594
You know, I also used
to be a tool salesman.
237
00:14:12,618 --> 00:14:14,630
I was the best salesman
Binford ever had.
238
00:14:14,654 --> 00:14:16,899
I know. How do you know?
239
00:14:16,923 --> 00:14:19,101
You told me a million times.
240
00:14:19,125 --> 00:14:23,005
I didn't tell you about being on
the road, though. Staying in hotels -
241
00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:25,374
you get to make a big mess and
someone else cleans up after you.
242
00:14:25,398 --> 00:14:27,376
Doesn't Mom do that?
243
00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:32,048
Yeah, but the chambermaid
doesn't give you those nasty looks.
244
00:14:32,072 --> 00:14:37,019
You get to eat all the food you want
- get bloated and all gassy at night.
245
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:38,754
That doesn't sound so good.
246
00:14:38,778 --> 00:14:42,391
Oh, but rental cars. You can
do whatever you want to 'em.
247
00:14:42,415 --> 00:14:44,260
Commuter flights.
(imitates plane sputtering)
248
00:14:44,284 --> 00:14:47,930
"Is that wing supposed to be doing
that?" (imitates plane nose-diving)
249
00:14:47,954 --> 00:14:51,167
Oh, boy. Staying up late.
Talking to your kids by phone.
250
00:14:51,191 --> 00:14:54,070
Never being home for
holidays. I hated doing that.
251
00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:58,107
Dad, if you were a tool salesman,
you'd never be home with us.
252
00:14:58,131 --> 00:15:00,809
I wanna be home with you
guys. I wanna do Tool Time.
253
00:15:00,833 --> 00:15:02,711
That's really the life I like.
254
00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:04,602
Here you go.
255
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:25,834
It stinks, Wilson.
256
00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:31,473
Well, Tim, you can't expect a
compost heap to smell like fine perfume.
257
00:15:31,497 --> 00:15:35,644
No, I'm referring to the situation
with that weasel Davidson.
258
00:15:35,668 --> 00:15:38,147
It's a lose-lose situation.
259
00:15:38,171 --> 00:15:42,551
I either promote a tool that I don't
believe in, or I risk losing my job?!
260
00:15:42,575 --> 00:15:46,755
Mm-hm-hm-hm-hm!
That is quite a pickle.
261
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:49,525
You're right, Wilson.
It's a real predicament.
262
00:15:49,549 --> 00:15:53,952
No, I was referring to the big dill between
the coffee grounds and the eggshells.
263
00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:56,799
Wilson, could we?
264
00:15:56,823 --> 00:15:59,201
Oh, I'm sorry, Tim.
265
00:15:59,225 --> 00:16:04,540
You know, it was Robert Ingersoll,
a 19th-century lawyer, who said:
266
00:16:04,564 --> 00:16:08,110
"It is a blessed thing
that in every age
267
00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:11,447
somebody has had the courage
to stand by their convictions."
268
00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,872
A lawyer said that?!
269
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:21,958
On the other hand, I'm reminded
of a general named Pyrrhus.
270
00:16:21,982 --> 00:16:23,392
That's right.
271
00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:26,228
It was a Greek general
who fought the Romans.
272
00:16:26,252 --> 00:16:29,098
His army won the war,
but he lost so many men,
273
00:16:29,122 --> 00:16:32,168
it might just as well
have been a defeat.
274
00:16:32,192 --> 00:16:34,736
Today we call that
a Pyrrhic victory.
275
00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:38,374
What are you saying? That
this might not be worth the fight?
276
00:16:38,398 --> 00:16:42,144
It wasn't for Pyrrhus.
It may be for you.
277
00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:46,849
You see, Tim, when it's a question of
integrity, there are no easy answers.
278
00:16:46,873 --> 00:16:51,153
I could come back.
279
00:16:51,177 --> 00:16:53,856
You're right, Wilson.
This is really a pickle.
280
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:56,981
And I don't mean that dill.
281
00:17:10,497 --> 00:17:14,443
So? What are you gonna do
about the reciprocating saw?
282
00:17:14,467 --> 00:17:17,846
I'm gonna do my job, Al.
283
00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:19,648
You're not gonna promote
it on the show, are you?
284
00:17:19,672 --> 00:17:21,484
What about your principles?
285
00:17:21,508 --> 00:17:27,023
I don't wanna end up in
a Pyrex victory, all right?
286
00:17:27,047 --> 00:17:28,690
What?
287
00:17:28,714 --> 00:17:33,262
Does everybody know
what time it is? Tool Time!
288
00:17:33,286 --> 00:17:37,955
That's right. Binford Tools is proud
to present Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor!
289
00:17:41,027 --> 00:17:42,571
Thank you.
290
00:17:42,595 --> 00:17:47,176
Thank you, everybody,
and welcome to Tool Time.
291
00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:50,468
I am Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor, and
you all know my assistant Al Borland.
292
00:17:53,540 --> 00:17:57,086
Today we finish up "What's
New" this week on Tool Time.
293
00:17:57,110 --> 00:17:59,555
Got a little surprise. How
would you guys all like to see
294
00:17:59,579 --> 00:18:02,324
a top-secret prototype of
a new tool from Binford?
295
00:18:02,348 --> 00:18:03,548
Yeah!
296
00:18:05,452 --> 00:18:10,132
Well, prepare your eyes, cover 'em
if you're a child, 'cause here we go.
297
00:18:10,156 --> 00:18:11,567
(audience) Whoa!
298
00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:13,169
"Whoa" is right. Look at this.
299
00:18:13,193 --> 00:18:17,906
The new Binford
6100 reciprocating saw.
300
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:20,609
(audience gasps) Phew!
301
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:24,980
Huh? Every tool Binford makes goes
through a rigorous quality-control system
302
00:18:25,004 --> 00:18:27,116
to make sure
it's top of the line.
303
00:18:27,140 --> 00:18:30,040
And the Binford 6100...
304
00:18:32,912 --> 00:18:36,180
bombed out big-time.
305
00:18:37,717 --> 00:18:40,729
Al, if you wanna walk
away, I'll understand.
306
00:18:40,753 --> 00:18:44,133
I never walk away
from a tool in need.
307
00:18:44,157 --> 00:18:46,535
That's right.
308
00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:52,274
The Binford 6100 bombed out of
every single test we threw at her.
309
00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:56,612
And... and I bet you're wondering who's
responsible for making a tool like this.
310
00:18:56,636 --> 00:19:01,049
It's the new president of Binford Tools,
Wes Davidson. He's right over there.
311
00:19:01,073 --> 00:19:03,785
A man who doesn't
mind a bad tool.
312
00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:07,845
As long as it's made
by somebody else.
313
00:19:09,782 --> 00:19:12,261
'Cause if it says Binford
on it, it's gotta be the best.
314
00:19:12,285 --> 00:19:15,197
I think Wes Davidson deserves
a big round of applause. Wes.
315
00:19:15,221 --> 00:19:16,554
Come on over here, Wes.
316
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:19,990
Come on!
317
00:19:22,128 --> 00:19:24,507
It's because of this man
318
00:19:24,531 --> 00:19:27,576
you'll only see quality
products in your hardware store.
319
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:31,046
Wes, tell us a little bit about the
problem you had developing the 6100.
320
00:19:31,070 --> 00:19:34,350
Please, tell us.
321
00:19:34,374 --> 00:19:35,917
I'd be glad to, guys.
322
00:19:35,941 --> 00:19:40,156
We found that the motor
was a little underpowered.
323
00:19:40,180 --> 00:19:42,924
And the casing?
324
00:19:42,948 --> 00:19:47,696
And the casing would have been
a little stronger had we used metal.
325
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:51,534
Hm. What are you
gonna do with it?
326
00:19:51,558 --> 00:19:55,971
Well, in the interests of the consumer,
I've decided to hold off production.
327
00:19:55,995 --> 00:19:57,728
(dramatic gasp)
328
00:20:00,066 --> 00:20:03,045
Isn't this the kind of guy
you want selling you tools?
329
00:20:03,069 --> 00:20:04,202
(audience) Yeah!
330
00:20:06,439 --> 00:20:10,786
Uh, I got an idea. Heidi, would
you bring out the Binford Big Boy ZX?
331
00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:12,042
Sure, Tim.
332
00:20:13,913 --> 00:20:17,560
Here on Tool Time, when
we have a tool or product
333
00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,528
that doesn't measure
up to our standards,
334
00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:22,931
we give it an... Ooh!
Interesting farewell.
335
00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:24,222
Heidi?
336
00:20:31,297 --> 00:20:33,375
The Binford tool masher.
337
00:20:33,399 --> 00:20:35,944
Al, you wanna take
the honors here?
338
00:20:35,968 --> 00:20:39,915
I don't think so, Tim.
339
00:20:39,939 --> 00:20:42,718
But perhaps Wes would like to.
340
00:20:42,742 --> 00:20:46,388
How about it, Mr. President?
341
00:20:46,412 --> 00:20:49,225
All right! Just shove
it right in there.
342
00:20:49,249 --> 00:20:50,881
Watch your hands!
343
00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:57,688
(machine whirring and clunking)
344
00:21:05,798 --> 00:21:08,944
And what we end up with...
345
00:21:08,968 --> 00:21:11,714
is the new Binford 6100...
346
00:21:11,738 --> 00:21:14,004
paperweight.
347
00:21:20,813 --> 00:21:25,961
("Tool Time" theme tune on TV)
348
00:21:25,985 --> 00:21:28,196
Honey, I'm so proud of you.
349
00:21:28,220 --> 00:21:32,301
It took a lot of integrity to
stand up to Davidson like that.
350
00:21:32,325 --> 00:21:34,703
Well, I'd like to say
it was no big deal.
351
00:21:34,727 --> 00:21:38,073
No, it was a big deal.
352
00:21:38,097 --> 00:21:40,542
However, if you
had lost your job,
353
00:21:40,566 --> 00:21:41,843
it wouldn't have
been the worst thing.
354
00:21:41,867 --> 00:21:44,613
What do you mean? I'd
have to go back to selling tools
355
00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:46,815
and be on the road for 30 weeks.
356
00:21:46,839 --> 00:21:50,852
And the downside would be?
357
00:21:50,876 --> 00:21:53,389
You'd miss me.
358
00:21:53,413 --> 00:21:56,714
Until Jake the pool
boy dropped by.
359
00:21:58,451 --> 00:22:03,064
We don't have a
pool. We'd get one.
360
00:22:03,088 --> 00:22:06,234
Maybe I'll just stay
home. That'd be OK, too.
361
00:22:06,258 --> 00:22:09,938
Since I'd be the major
breadwinner, you'd have to stay home
362
00:22:09,962 --> 00:22:11,507
and do the laundry
and the cooking
363
00:22:11,531 --> 00:22:14,075
and the shopping, cleaning...
364
00:22:14,099 --> 00:22:16,345
30 weeks isn't that long.
365
00:22:16,369 --> 00:22:20,115
I'd have two very
interesting options.
366
00:22:20,139 --> 00:22:23,018
On the one hand, you would
stay home and do the laundry.
367
00:22:23,042 --> 00:22:26,944
And on the other hand,
I would get the pool guy.
368
00:22:30,950 --> 00:22:32,861
Oh, honey!
369
00:22:32,885 --> 00:22:36,253
I'd never trade you for anybody.
370
00:22:39,692 --> 00:22:43,327
Unless I could get a pool
boy who did the laundry.
371
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,945
(woman) ...four, three, two...
372
00:22:49,969 --> 00:22:52,370
(loud "Tool Time" theme tune)
373
00:22:56,308 --> 00:22:58,308
(laughter)
374
00:23:04,049 --> 00:23:05,293
Did it scare you?
375
00:23:05,317 --> 00:23:08,352
Loud theme song! So loud!
375
00:23:09,305 --> 00:24:09,542
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