1 00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:11,102 Man, this ice cream really is frozen. 2 00:00:12,078 --> 00:00:14,569 How long is it gonna take before we get to eat it? 3 00:00:14,647 --> 00:00:18,048 Well, l'm guessing about 1 2 more spoons. 4 00:00:20,487 --> 00:00:23,320 Tim, l found the video camera. 5 00:00:23,923 --> 00:00:27,017 - (Tim) What do you want that for? - l want you to tape my speech. 6 00:00:27,093 --> 00:00:29,084 Don't worry, Mom. You're gonna do great. 7 00:00:29,162 --> 00:00:31,426 l'm so nervous about this library opening. 8 00:00:31,498 --> 00:00:34,296 l have never spoken in front of so many people before. 9 00:00:34,367 --> 00:00:36,892 Oh, you have nothing to worry about. 10 00:00:36,970 --> 00:00:41,407 And, by the way, did we mention that you look awesome? 11 00:00:43,410 --> 00:00:45,970 Why do you have your hands behind your backs? 12 00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:50,415 Just a little change of pace from keeping 'em in front, you know. 13 00:00:50,483 --> 00:00:54,078 Uh, yeah. You oughta try it, it's a lot of fun. 14 00:00:54,154 --> 00:00:55,917 Let's see 'em. 15 00:00:55,989 --> 00:00:58,116 Both of 'em. You're so pathetic. 16 00:00:58,191 --> 00:01:00,352 Oh, guys. 17 00:01:00,427 --> 00:01:04,022 How many times have l told you not to break the spoons in the ice cream? 18 00:01:04,097 --> 00:01:10,093 - What happened that ice cream scooper? - lt didn't work right. Dad's trying to fix it. 19 00:01:10,170 --> 00:01:12,502 - Dad did fix it. - Oh, great. 20 00:01:15,375 --> 00:01:20,039 l took the 35-watt element out and replaced it with one out of an electric curling iron. 21 00:01:20,113 --> 00:01:22,513 Tim, we don't have time for this. We have to go. 22 00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:26,746 Now you not only melt the ice cream, you can style at the same time. 23 00:01:26,820 --> 00:01:29,311 - Just flip her on. - (scoop humming) 24 00:01:31,057 --> 00:01:35,960 Watch this baby go right through this stuff. Look at that. 25 00:01:41,401 --> 00:01:42,891 Hey. 26 00:01:42,969 --> 00:01:44,960 Milkshake, anybody? 27 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:52,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 28 00:02:39,225 --> 00:02:41,193 Whoa, Al. 29 00:02:41,261 --> 00:02:43,786 Cut me in for half and l won't tell Harry. 30 00:02:48,902 --> 00:02:52,861 l'm not robbing the store. Haven't you heard? l'm part owner. 31 00:02:52,939 --> 00:02:54,998 Yeah. A very small part. 32 00:02:55,074 --> 00:02:59,204 You see that corner over there? That's what you own. 33 00:02:59,279 --> 00:03:02,476 - Eddie, how you doing? - l'm fine, Harry. How are you? 34 00:03:02,549 --> 00:03:06,485 lt's great that we feel comfortable enough to joke with each other. 35 00:03:06,553 --> 00:03:08,714 Right, froggy voice? 36 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:14,084 - Right, Al. - (imitates Harry) Right, Harry. 37 00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:16,651 - Hey, guys. - Hey, Tim. How's it going? 38 00:03:16,729 --> 00:03:20,096 - Hi, Tim. - Have you got a small screwdriver set? 39 00:03:20,166 --> 00:03:22,600 Tape's jammed in my camera. 40 00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,865 Here you go. How's it going? 41 00:03:25,939 --> 00:03:29,670 l'm numb. l just spent three of the most boring hours of my life at the library. 42 00:03:29,742 --> 00:03:31,869 Three hours? 43 00:03:31,945 --> 00:03:36,211 You know, if you put together all the time l've ever spent in a library, 44 00:03:36,282 --> 00:03:39,308 it wouldn't come out to be three hours. 45 00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:41,478 Who would have guessed? 46 00:03:42,488 --> 00:03:45,116 Jill had a speech at the library. l told her l'd tape it. 47 00:03:45,191 --> 00:03:48,524 You taped that? Great, 'cause llene really wanted to see it. 48 00:03:48,595 --> 00:03:51,894 - ls she the orthodontist you're seeing? - That she is. 49 00:03:51,965 --> 00:03:55,560 Maybe one night this week, llene and l could come and watch Jill's speech. 50 00:03:55,635 --> 00:04:00,663 We'll show you the tape of llene speaking at the wisdom tooth symposium. 51 00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:03,641 Or l could just put my head in a vise. 52 00:04:05,612 --> 00:04:09,173 - Timmy, are those things hard to use? - No, not anymore. 53 00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:12,810 Point and shoot, pretty much. Put her on ''auto.'' Push your lens cap aside. 54 00:04:12,885 --> 00:04:14,614 You start shooting. 55 00:04:14,687 --> 00:04:18,088 Why does everybody wave at these things? 56 00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:23,162 lt's perfect. l do birthdays, holidays, all of our vacations. 57 00:04:23,229 --> 00:04:27,893 My favorite thing is oddly misshapen butt cracks. Look at that. 58 00:04:27,967 --> 00:04:30,765 - Zoom in. Yo! - Tim. 59 00:04:30,837 --> 00:04:33,362 Would you turn that thing off? 60 00:04:33,439 --> 00:04:35,430 Careful with that. 61 00:04:37,176 --> 00:04:40,703 - So that library thing was pretty bad, huh? - Let's put it this way. 62 00:04:40,780 --> 00:04:45,843 Jill's speech was so boring, l had to check my pulse to see if l was still alive. 63 00:04:46,319 --> 00:04:49,447 Harry, he's exaggerating. Jill is a very fine speaker. 64 00:04:49,522 --> 00:04:55,290 Generally she is, but she started quoting some poetry. lt was blanket and pillow time. 65 00:04:55,361 --> 00:04:59,627 You wanna talk sleep - my wife starts going on about her antique button collection? 66 00:04:59,699 --> 00:05:01,690 l'm in a coma. 67 00:05:01,768 --> 00:05:05,568 Hey, forget coma. Last night, my wife starts talking about decorating. 68 00:05:05,638 --> 00:05:10,337 - Oh, boy. - l was clinically dead for three minutes. 69 00:05:10,410 --> 00:05:11,968 Clear! 70 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:18,042 l'm not kidding. There she is, yakking about new fabrics for the sunroom. 71 00:05:18,117 --> 00:05:20,950 l didn't know what the old fabrics looked like. 72 00:05:21,020 --> 00:05:23,989 l didn't even know we had a sunroom. 73 00:05:24,457 --> 00:05:28,553 l tell you what kills me - is when my wife wants to talk about our ''relationship.'' 74 00:05:28,628 --> 00:05:30,653 Like you have one. 75 00:05:30,730 --> 00:05:34,222 No, wait. l got a better one. My wife's studying psychology right now. 76 00:05:34,300 --> 00:05:37,030 Boy, is she boring when she yammers on about these terms - 77 00:05:37,103 --> 00:05:40,630 neurotic, psychotic, halitosis, neurosis, cirrhosis, l don't know. 78 00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:43,608 Dysfunction, dat function, your function. 79 00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:45,667 My wife is much more boring. 80 00:05:45,745 --> 00:05:48,771 No one is as boring as my wife. 81 00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:51,908 When my wife talks psychology, she is the big bopper of boredom. 82 00:05:51,984 --> 00:05:54,145 So l got this great strategy. This is cool. 83 00:05:54,220 --> 00:05:59,214 l just pretend like l'm listening and fade her out and just go, ''Whuh-huh.'' 84 00:05:59,292 --> 00:06:04,594 You guys, maybe it's 'cause l'm new to my relationship, but l like talking to llene. 85 00:06:04,664 --> 00:06:06,655 (Tim. ddie. Harry) Uh-huh. 86 00:06:09,802 --> 00:06:13,363 lt's true. l find everything she says fascinating and illuminating. 87 00:06:13,439 --> 00:06:15,873 (Tim. ddie. Harry) Whuh-huh. 88 00:06:15,942 --> 00:06:20,970 That's 'cause in your relationship, you are the boring one. 89 00:06:22,248 --> 00:06:26,981 To uote my favorite poet. lizabeth Barrett Browning 90 00:06:27,854 --> 00:06:30,721 ''Books. books. books '' 91 00:06:30,790 --> 00:06:33,281 ''I had found the secret of a garret-room 92 00:06:33,359 --> 00:06:36,954 ''Piled high with cases in my father's name. 93 00:06:37,029 --> 00:06:40,328 ''Piled high. packed large - where. creeping in and out 94 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:44,336 ''Among the giant fossils of my past 95 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:49,068 ''In heats of terror. haste. victorious joy. 96 00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:53,670 ''The first book first And how I felt it beat 97 00:06:53,746 --> 00:06:55,714 ''Under my pillow . in the morning's dark. 98 00:06:55,782 --> 00:06:58,342 ''An hour before the sun would let me read! 99 00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:00,909 ''My books!'' 100 00:07:04,190 --> 00:07:06,886 - You were wonderful. - That was great. 101 00:07:06,959 --> 00:07:09,519 l love Elizabeth Barrett Browning. 102 00:07:09,595 --> 00:07:13,691 ''lf thou must love me, let it be for love's sake only.'' 103 00:07:13,766 --> 00:07:16,860 Put a socketh in it, Aleth. 104 00:07:17,370 --> 00:07:20,806 - So it was all right? l was so nervous. - Oh, yeah. You were great. 105 00:07:20,873 --> 00:07:24,274 So commanding. You look great in that suit. 106 00:07:24,343 --> 00:07:27,471 l could have seen that tape over and over and over again. 107 00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:30,983 - Thank you, sweetie. - l'm glad you taped it so we could see it. 108 00:07:31,050 --> 00:07:33,211 l felt like l was there. 109 00:07:33,986 --> 00:07:37,319 (Tim) Why does everybody wave at these things? I do birthdays 110 00:07:37,390 --> 00:07:40,154 Wait a minute. Whose butt is this? 111 00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:45,196 - l know whose it is. - Very nice, Al. 112 00:07:45,264 --> 00:07:47,664 - Turn that thing o - Careful with that 113 00:07:47,733 --> 00:07:51,100 - So that library thing was pretty bad? - Let's put it this way 114 00:07:51,170 --> 00:07:56,665 Jill's speech was so dull. I had to check my pulse to see if I was still alive 115 00:07:57,877 --> 00:08:00,072 Uh-oh. 116 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:05,140 - Did you tape this? - l didn't know it was on. l just put it down. 117 00:08:06,519 --> 00:08:10,455 No. I got it worse than either of you guys Now Jill's studying psychology 118 00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:14,220 Boy. she is so boring the way she yammers on with these useless terms 119 00:08:14,293 --> 00:08:16,887 This is very illuminating. ''So boring''? 120 00:08:16,963 --> 00:08:20,262 That's not what l said. l said ''sobering.'' 121 00:08:21,834 --> 00:08:24,166 We'll just let ourselves out. 122 00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:27,729 No. We gotta see that tape on the wisdom teeth. 123 00:08:27,807 --> 00:08:32,335 - We'll leave it with you, OK? - How about coffee? We gotta have coffee. 124 00:08:32,411 --> 00:08:35,346 l'll make that cappuccino stuff. l'll make a pie. 125 00:08:35,414 --> 00:08:37,882 Why don't stay the night? 126 00:08:43,890 --> 00:08:46,222 Well, l suppose you wanna talk about this? 127 00:08:46,292 --> 00:08:48,419 Oh, no. l wouldn't wanna bore you. 128 00:08:48,494 --> 00:08:50,894 That's all right. Go ahead. 129 00:08:52,164 --> 00:08:56,157 - l wanna hear what you have to say. - l've already heard what you have to say. 130 00:08:56,235 --> 00:08:58,226 l was in a hardware store with the guys. 131 00:08:58,304 --> 00:09:02,400 - ls this how you really feel about me? - No, it's just what l say about you. 132 00:09:02,475 --> 00:09:05,706 lt's a hardware store. We guys say whatever we wanna say. 133 00:09:05,778 --> 00:09:09,373 Because it's a hardware store, you don't have to account for what you say? 134 00:09:09,448 --> 00:09:13,714 Yes. No. You're blowing this all out of proportion. You know how men talk. 135 00:09:13,786 --> 00:09:16,619 - You and your girlfriends do the same. - That is not true. 136 00:09:16,689 --> 00:09:21,058 l have never once said anything behind your back that l haven't said to your face. 137 00:09:21,127 --> 00:09:23,857 - That proves l'm more sensitive than you. - How? 138 00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:29,926 lf l have something to say about you, l have the courtesy to say it in front of strangers. 139 00:09:31,137 --> 00:09:33,264 That's insane. 140 00:09:33,339 --> 00:09:35,739 lt was a conversation you should've never heard. 141 00:09:35,808 --> 00:09:38,436 lt was a conversation that you never should have had. 142 00:09:38,511 --> 00:09:42,208 - A conversation you shouldn't have seen. - This conversation is over. 143 00:09:42,281 --> 00:09:47,378 Well, that's good because l'm sick of saying the word ''conversation.'' 144 00:09:52,658 --> 00:09:55,821 - Does everybody know what time it is? - Tool Time! 145 00:09:55,895 --> 00:09:58,989 lt's rock-'n'-roll day on Tool Time. with those rocking tool men, 146 00:09:59,065 --> 00:10:01,431 Tim Taylor and Al Borland. Whoo! 147 00:10:01,500 --> 00:10:03,661 (rock-'n'-roll music) 148 00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:16,271 Heidi. Heidi. 149 00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:19,378 Heidi! 150 00:10:23,522 --> 00:10:27,288 Hi. Welcome to Tool Time l am Tim ''The Cool Man'' Taylor. 151 00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:30,921 And you all know my assistant, the King, Al-vis. 152 00:10:30,997 --> 00:10:33,522 (imitating lvis) Thank you. Thank you very much. 153 00:10:33,599 --> 00:10:35,931 Today, we're gonna have a rocking good time, 154 00:10:36,002 --> 00:10:41,030 because we're gonna be building ourselves a rocking chair. 155 00:10:41,841 --> 00:10:44,503 This is the last theme show we're gonna do. 156 00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:46,670 Thank you. Thank you very much. 157 00:10:46,746 --> 00:10:49,112 - A rocking... - Could we? 158 00:10:49,181 --> 00:10:52,514 (normal voice) All right. Well, yesterday, if you remember, 159 00:10:52,585 --> 00:10:56,419 we bent the wood for the frame of our chair by putting it in this steamer box. 160 00:10:56,489 --> 00:10:59,754 The steam made the wood pliable and easy to shape. 161 00:10:59,825 --> 00:11:02,055 Speaking of steam, l wanna let off some. 162 00:11:02,128 --> 00:11:03,425 - Tim. - Al. 163 00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:07,489 Why don't women understand that men need a place to be men? 164 00:11:07,566 --> 00:11:10,831 To get together with other men and discuss manly things. Right, men? 165 00:11:10,903 --> 00:11:12,768 (all) Yeah. 166 00:11:12,838 --> 00:11:16,604 All kinds of men stuff, you know - from V-8 engines to smelly feet, 167 00:11:16,676 --> 00:11:20,203 to what annoys us most about our wives. (grunts) 168 00:11:20,279 --> 00:11:25,080 - Where do you nag about the little lady? - Divorce court. 169 00:11:25,151 --> 00:11:28,609 Moving along. You up there, sir. You, sir. 170 00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:31,452 Where were you the last time you were with a group of men 171 00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:34,254 letting off steam about women? 172 00:11:34,326 --> 00:11:37,056 Jackson State penitentiary. 173 00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:41,925 Well, l'm glad we made this little journey. Al. 174 00:11:42,501 --> 00:11:46,232 All right. lf you remember, l told you that we've already bent our wood. 175 00:11:46,305 --> 00:11:48,933 Now we're ready to make the legs and posts of our chair, 176 00:11:49,008 --> 00:11:52,341 using the Binford 61 00 variable-speed wood lathe. 177 00:11:52,411 --> 00:11:57,246 That's right. Now, we first use a rough gouge to take off the square edges. 178 00:11:57,316 --> 00:12:01,013 Then Al will use the half-inch round nose to start shaping our piece. 179 00:12:01,087 --> 00:12:03,647 Marv, bring the camera and let's take a look at this. 180 00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:07,750 There are various types of patterns to shape your legs. 181 00:12:07,827 --> 00:12:12,093 Or you can do it freehand. lt's a very difficult skill to master. 182 00:12:12,164 --> 00:12:14,758 You might wanna practice on a spare piece of wood. 183 00:12:14,834 --> 00:12:17,394 That's good advice. l'll give you more good advice. 184 00:12:17,470 --> 00:12:19,961 Always think safety when working with a lathe. 185 00:12:20,039 --> 00:12:22,303 You notice l didn't wear a necktie. 186 00:12:22,374 --> 00:12:25,138 You want nothing hanging down and no loose clothing. 187 00:12:25,211 --> 00:12:27,736 - The possibility... - (laughter) 188 00:12:27,813 --> 00:12:29,804 Let me finish. 189 00:12:30,616 --> 00:12:32,607 Sometimes... 190 00:12:42,061 --> 00:12:47,556 lf you get too close to a lathe, you can lose an article of clothing. 191 00:12:47,633 --> 00:12:50,124 ls it a little chilly in here? 192 00:12:56,575 --> 00:12:58,941 - Hey, Wilson. - Hi-de-ho, neighborette. 193 00:12:59,011 --> 00:13:01,036 Can you do me a favor? 194 00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:03,411 Tim is running late and l have a class. 195 00:13:03,482 --> 00:13:07,145 - Can you keep an eye on the kids for me? - That'll be my pleasure, Jill. 196 00:13:07,219 --> 00:13:10,484 How did that Elizabeth Barrett Browning poem l gave you work out? 197 00:13:10,556 --> 00:13:12,547 Not too well with Tim. 198 00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:14,286 After he taped my speech, 199 00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:17,488 he taped himself making fun of me at the hardware store. 200 00:13:17,563 --> 00:13:18,655 Yeow. 201 00:13:18,731 --> 00:13:21,632 l guess l can expect Tim out here pretty soon. 202 00:13:22,535 --> 00:13:27,268 l doubt it. He didn't think he did anything wrong. He said he was doing what 203 00:13:27,339 --> 00:13:30,103 (deep voice) all guys do when they get together. 204 00:13:30,176 --> 00:13:34,579 Well, Jill, the renowned psychiatrist lrvin D. Yalom 205 00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:37,138 postulated that men relieve their isolation 206 00:13:37,216 --> 00:13:39,616 by bonding over common fears and experiences. 207 00:13:39,685 --> 00:13:43,382 Yalom was talking about universality as it applies to formal therapy, 208 00:13:43,455 --> 00:13:47,448 not a bunch of guys sitting around dumping on their wives. 209 00:13:50,696 --> 00:13:53,824 Well, that's an excellent point. 210 00:13:53,899 --> 00:13:58,495 However, knowing Tim, l'm sure it was just an innocent exchange bearing no malice. 211 00:13:58,571 --> 00:14:00,562 (giggles) 212 00:14:02,274 --> 00:14:07,211 As Freud so humorously pointed out, ''Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.'' 213 00:14:07,279 --> 00:14:10,976 That is such a crock. As Carl Jung says: 214 00:14:11,050 --> 00:14:14,645 ''lf people can be educated to see the lowly side of their own natures, 215 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:19,350 ''then they might also understand their fellow man or woman better.'' 216 00:14:19,425 --> 00:14:22,451 With due respect to Jung, l believe it was Bruno Bettelheim... 217 00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:26,089 Oh, don't Bettelheim me. 218 00:14:26,165 --> 00:14:30,568 Tim was talking about me behind my back, and you know what Andrea Dworkin says. 219 00:14:30,636 --> 00:14:33,400 Actually, l don't. 220 00:14:33,472 --> 00:14:36,908 She says if women talk about people behind their backs, it's ''gossip,'' 221 00:14:36,976 --> 00:14:39,843 but if men do it, it's ''male bonding.'' 222 00:14:41,247 --> 00:14:44,216 Jill, ever since you decided to go back to school, 223 00:14:44,283 --> 00:14:47,810 you've made things so very, very hard on me. 224 00:14:51,857 --> 00:14:55,418 - That your card? - Yeah. How did you do that? 225 00:14:55,494 --> 00:14:58,156 - Guess what l have. - Rabies. 226 00:14:59,832 --> 00:15:02,300 No. This videotape. 227 00:15:03,302 --> 00:15:05,770 l heard Mom and Dad arguing about it last night, 228 00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:08,238 so then l came down and got the tape. 229 00:15:08,307 --> 00:15:10,366 Hey, that was pretty sneaky. 230 00:15:10,442 --> 00:15:15,038 You know, Mark, if you keep this up, you might actually turn into a person. 231 00:15:15,114 --> 00:15:18,379 Thanks. l really wanna be a person. 232 00:15:18,450 --> 00:15:20,645 No one is as boring as my wife 233 00:15:20,719 --> 00:15:22,880 Guys. guys. believe me I got it 234 00:15:22,955 --> 00:15:26,891 When Jill's talking about psychology. she's the big bopper of boredom 235 00:15:26,959 --> 00:15:30,360 Whoa. Mom saw this and Dad's still alive? 236 00:15:31,330 --> 00:15:34,322 Yeah, well, the night is still young. 237 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:37,926 Hey, shut that off. You guys shouldn't be watching that. 238 00:15:38,003 --> 00:15:40,130 - Why not? - Why? 239 00:15:40,205 --> 00:15:43,402 Because it's private adult stuff. You wouldn't understand. 240 00:15:43,475 --> 00:15:47,172 You're making fun of Mom. What's so hard to understand? 241 00:15:48,147 --> 00:15:52,413 l'm not making fun of Mom. l'm making fun of my wife. 242 00:15:52,484 --> 00:15:57,353 Dad, l don't know if you realize this, but they're the same person. 243 00:15:57,423 --> 00:16:00,586 lt's a joke. lt's a little joke. She knows it. End of story, OK? 244 00:16:00,659 --> 00:16:05,528 - Why isn't she talking to you? - You're acting a lot like Brad and Randy. 245 00:16:05,597 --> 00:16:08,430 - Thanks. - Let me explain something to you guys. 246 00:16:08,500 --> 00:16:11,435 A lot of things can be said in the privacy of a hardware store 247 00:16:11,503 --> 00:16:15,906 that cannot be said in public places like your home. 248 00:16:22,681 --> 00:16:26,640 So what you're saying is you can make fun of Mom, but not when she's around. 249 00:16:26,719 --> 00:16:29,381 - That's not what l'm saying. - What are you saying? 250 00:16:29,455 --> 00:16:33,824 lt's disrespectful to say anything about other people when they're not around. 251 00:16:33,892 --> 00:16:36,793 Especially if a camera is rolling. 252 00:16:39,732 --> 00:16:42,860 - Gotcha, Dad. - Upstairs. Come on, come on, come on. 253 00:16:42,935 --> 00:16:45,995 - Good luck, Dad. - Hi, Mom. Bye, Mom. 254 00:16:46,071 --> 00:16:48,062 - Hi, Mom. - Hi. 255 00:16:49,608 --> 00:16:52,577 Jill, l'm really sorry about the stuff on this tape. 256 00:16:52,644 --> 00:16:54,407 You are? 257 00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:57,938 You know how l am. l started getting laughs. l get on a roll. 258 00:16:58,017 --> 00:17:01,111 When l get like that, l don't really think about what l'm saying. 259 00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:04,849 - Your speech wasn't that bad. - Look. 260 00:17:04,923 --> 00:17:07,448 What you said about my speech was humiliating, 261 00:17:07,526 --> 00:17:12,589 but what really got to me was the way you put me down for talking about psychology. 262 00:17:12,664 --> 00:17:15,690 - l didn't mean that. - Tim, come on. 263 00:17:15,768 --> 00:17:21,832 Do you think l don't notice your eyes glaze over every time l try to talk to you about it? 264 00:17:24,143 --> 00:17:27,010 l know that you think it's gobbledegook, but l love it. 265 00:17:27,079 --> 00:17:31,379 l'm working really hard. l'm juggling my life around so l can make this thing happen. 266 00:17:31,450 --> 00:17:34,010 And when you demean it, it's just... 267 00:17:34,086 --> 00:17:36,418 lt hurts me. 268 00:17:44,596 --> 00:17:46,928 So-So who-who's gonna make dinner? 269 00:18:03,682 --> 00:18:05,479 - l need this book. - ln a minute. 270 00:18:05,551 --> 00:18:09,783 l'm reading something here about my souped-up ego. 271 00:18:11,190 --> 00:18:15,286 That's ''superego.'' Why are you reading my book? 272 00:18:15,360 --> 00:18:18,193 l wanna find out why this is so interesting to you. 273 00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:21,289 Because you want to or because you feel guilty? 274 00:18:21,366 --> 00:18:24,961 According to chapter two, a little of both. 275 00:18:26,972 --> 00:18:29,873 - You read two chapters? - Yes. 276 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:33,810 And the chapter on animal sexuality's quite interesting. 277 00:18:35,347 --> 00:18:37,338 You really think so? 278 00:18:37,416 --> 00:18:42,649 Yeah. l'm not saying a few pictures wouldn't help the process. 279 00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:51,362 lf you think that's interesting, wait till the chapter on aberrant female sexuality. 280 00:18:52,231 --> 00:18:54,597 Read it. 281 00:18:55,701 --> 00:18:59,228 Actually started with that chapter first. 282 00:18:59,304 --> 00:19:03,263 From now on, l'm reading everything you read. 283 00:19:03,342 --> 00:19:05,071 You don't have to go that far. 284 00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:08,238 Honey, when l go at something, l go full-bore. 285 00:19:08,313 --> 00:19:10,440 Something else l figured out we might do. 286 00:19:10,516 --> 00:19:13,883 l'm gonna take you to see those three tenors that you love on PBS. 287 00:19:13,952 --> 00:19:17,183 Paparazzi, Manicotti and Flamingo. 288 00:19:17,756 --> 00:19:21,089 (imitating opera singer) 289 00:19:24,663 --> 00:19:29,794 Tim, you just named a photographer, a food and a hotel. 290 00:19:30,302 --> 00:19:33,169 l don't care what they do, they sing great. 291 00:19:33,238 --> 00:19:37,072 Well, that would be really nice, because... 292 00:19:37,142 --> 00:19:41,135 it's been my fantasy to be with a man who enjoyed doing the same things l do. 293 00:19:41,213 --> 00:19:45,013 You know, like taking me to the opera, the ballet, the theater. 294 00:19:45,083 --> 00:19:47,142 That's my fantasy too. 295 00:19:48,153 --> 00:19:49,518 - Really? - Mm-hm. 296 00:19:49,588 --> 00:19:54,025 lf l could find that man, l wouldn't have to go myself. 297 00:20:00,465 --> 00:20:03,525 What is your real fantasy? 298 00:20:09,141 --> 00:20:12,474 lt involves some twins and a yo-yo. 299 00:20:15,647 --> 00:20:18,138 Yeah, l know who the yo-yo is. 300 00:20:31,396 --> 00:20:32,829 Hi. 301 00:20:32,898 --> 00:20:34,957 Oh, no. What have you taped now? 302 00:20:35,033 --> 00:20:38,059 More pearls of wisdom from the hardware store? 303 00:20:38,136 --> 00:20:41,037 No. Actually, l went back and looked at the tape. 304 00:20:41,106 --> 00:20:44,269 There's a second part of the conversation you never even saw. 305 00:20:44,343 --> 00:20:48,370 - You should take a look at it. - l don't think so. l've seen enough. 306 00:20:48,447 --> 00:20:52,884 No, really. Come over here and take a look at this. 307 00:20:54,686 --> 00:20:59,714 You know . Harry. on second thought. I really did enjoy my wife's speech 308 00:20:59,791 --> 00:21:01,816 - You took this five minutes later? - Yeah. 309 00:21:01,893 --> 00:21:04,760 You're wearing different clothes. 310 00:21:04,830 --> 00:21:08,425 Men in hardware stores change frequently. 311 00:21:10,869 --> 00:21:15,101 (stiltedly) T-Tool Man. you have shown me the way 312 00:21:15,173 --> 00:21:17,437 Because of you 313 00:21:18,443 --> 00:21:24,746 I now realize how much I love talking to my wife about her needs 314 00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:31,182 That is realistic dialogue. 315 00:21:31,256 --> 00:21:34,919 Tool Man. you are the greatest 316 00:21:36,328 --> 00:21:41,163 You have shown me the love that I have for my mife 317 00:21:43,802 --> 00:21:46,100 Your W's look like M's That's why I said ''mife '' 318 00:21:46,171 --> 00:21:48,139 Your W's do look like M's. 319 00:21:48,206 --> 00:21:52,472 Well. it's good we got in touch with our true feelings I didn't mean to hurt my wife 320 00:21:52,544 --> 00:21:55,741 And I hope that she knows that 321 00:21:55,814 --> 00:21:58,408 Yeah, yeah, she knows that. 322 00:22:00,485 --> 00:22:03,648 (mimics) Tool Man, you are the greatest. 323 00:22:07,025 --> 00:22:10,051 l am so happy to be your mife. 324 00:22:14,299 --> 00:22:17,530 Look how easy this thing is. Oh, oh, oh. 325 00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:23,035 Hm. 326 00:22:23,975 --> 00:22:26,000 Might be just a bit hot. 327 00:22:31,016 --> 00:22:35,419 Harry, he's ''exaggeuating.'' Jill is a very fine speaker. 328 00:22:35,487 --> 00:22:37,045 (laughter) 329 00:22:38,305 --> 00:23:38,543 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org