1
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:11,020
Welcome to a special
Tool Time on location.
2
00:00:11,044 --> 00:00:13,156
I am Tim "the Tool Man" Taylor.
3
00:00:13,180 --> 00:00:17,193
And you all know my
assistant, Al "La Carte" Borland.
4
00:00:17,217 --> 00:00:19,128
We're here on location
to introduce to you
5
00:00:19,152 --> 00:00:21,965
another one of our unsung
heroes of the job site.
6
00:00:21,989 --> 00:00:26,302
That's right. Heidi, my unsung
heroes theme music, please.
7
00:00:26,326 --> 00:00:29,973
Heidi. Heidi! Guys,
back to work, please.
8
00:00:29,997 --> 00:00:31,875
Here you go, Tim.
9
00:00:31,899 --> 00:00:34,777
(♪ march)
10
00:00:34,801 --> 00:00:38,114
♪ He gets no thanks
and that ain't right
11
00:00:38,138 --> 00:00:41,752
♪ He's the unsung
hero of the job site ♪
12
00:00:41,776 --> 00:00:43,753
All right, now,
13
00:00:43,777 --> 00:00:47,223
today we're gonna meet the man who
drives this great-looking lunch wagon.
14
00:00:47,247 --> 00:00:50,794
Hi, there. This is Nick
Cantalupo. The man, the melon.
15
00:00:50,818 --> 00:00:52,562
Thanks, Tim. Uh...
16
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:56,800
Your food service vehicle doesn't get
much respect in the culinary community.
17
00:00:56,824 --> 00:01:00,604
People call it the "roach
coach," the "barf bus,"
18
00:01:00,628 --> 00:01:03,240
the "upchuck wagon,"
the "vomit van."
19
00:01:03,264 --> 00:01:05,876
Well, Nick, you're really
whetting my appetite.
20
00:01:05,900 --> 00:01:10,213
Good. Because today we're serving
up some really savory selections.
21
00:01:10,237 --> 00:01:13,650
Chili and onions, chili cheese
dogs, three-cheese chili omelets.
22
00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:16,319
(whistles) I think I've
died and gone to heaven.
23
00:01:16,343 --> 00:01:18,889
I know what killed ya.
24
00:01:18,913 --> 00:01:22,959
Well, why don't you show us
inside the truck there? Glad to, Al.
25
00:01:22,983 --> 00:01:25,495
(whistles) Boy, Nick!
This place is immaculate.
26
00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:30,200
Thank you, Tim. I take great
pride in my sanitary skills.
27
00:01:30,224 --> 00:01:33,203
Over here we have
your heated service trays.
28
00:01:33,227 --> 00:01:35,872
Now, this looks to be
some type of a cooling unit.
29
00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:39,943
Yes, Al. In our business,
we refer to it as a refrigerator.
30
00:01:39,967 --> 00:01:42,045
And over here, this is Rosie,
31
00:01:42,069 --> 00:01:44,114
the fastest short-order
cook in the business.
32
00:01:44,138 --> 00:01:46,416
Hi, Rosie. Tim, you tell
her whatever you want,
33
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:48,585
and you'll be eating before
you're done ordering it.
34
00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:50,987
Three stacks of pancakes,
eggs over-medium,
35
00:01:51,011 --> 00:01:54,024
home fries smothered in chili.
36
00:01:54,048 --> 00:01:57,849
(mock-belches) Boy,
that was good. Very fast.
37
00:02:00,121 --> 00:02:01,820
Pretty fast, huh?
38
00:02:04,959 --> 00:02:07,559
She is fast.
39
00:02:11,031 --> 00:02:14,144
Hey! Wow! She's
speedy with a spatula.
40
00:02:14,168 --> 00:02:16,513
Well, I don't want to brag,
but I think I'm speedier.
41
00:02:16,537 --> 00:02:20,016
Is he for real? It's a
question I often ask myself.
42
00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:23,519
Hey, I worked my way through
college as a short-order cook.
43
00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:25,856
You get pretty speedy
after eight-and-a-half years.
44
00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:28,146
Rosie, may I?
45
00:02:32,820 --> 00:02:36,187
A little more butter
on there. All right.
46
00:02:43,631 --> 00:02:47,377
Don't worry about these eggshells,
because basically, it's roughage.
47
00:02:47,401 --> 00:02:50,346
To spice it up a little bit,
I like a little of this just...
48
00:02:50,370 --> 00:02:52,616
Ah, OK. There you go.
49
00:02:52,640 --> 00:02:57,910
Now, watch. I learned this
little trick my senior year.
50
00:03:02,149 --> 00:03:04,728
Get some plates. I'm all
ready to go. Ready to go. Whoa!
51
00:03:04,752 --> 00:03:07,197
I tell you what, Nick
- you hold the plate.
52
00:03:07,221 --> 00:03:11,134
Look at that. Huh?
53
00:03:11,158 --> 00:03:13,169
Clean it up there. As
speedy as I remember.
54
00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:15,327
What do you think, Nick?
55
00:03:18,065 --> 00:03:21,478
Maybe another year of college
would've helped my accuracy a little bit.
56
00:03:21,502 --> 00:03:24,769
You know, you have
your choice of toast, Nick.
57
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:32,074
Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org
58
00:04:16,356 --> 00:04:18,801
Hey! How're you doing?
Good to see you. Yeah.
59
00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:21,438
Hey, Milton. How's everything?
Great. Good to see you.
60
00:04:21,462 --> 00:04:23,773
Hey, guys. Hello,
Mr. Harper, sir.
61
00:04:23,797 --> 00:04:25,475
Hey. Hey, boss.
62
00:04:25,499 --> 00:04:29,279
Great show today at that
catering truck. Thanks very much.
63
00:04:29,303 --> 00:04:32,148
Some of your funniest
stuff, Tim. Yeah.
64
00:04:32,172 --> 00:04:34,150
What about me?
65
00:04:34,174 --> 00:04:35,885
You were in it, too?
66
00:04:35,909 --> 00:04:38,922
Yes. But if it pleases
you, I can be edited out.
67
00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:41,791
Relax, Borland. I'm just
giving you a hard time.
68
00:04:41,815 --> 00:04:43,593
Where's your sense of humor?
69
00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:46,584
In a little town called Nowhere.
70
00:04:47,988 --> 00:04:50,066
Well, if you'll excuse me,
I think I'll go someplace
71
00:04:50,090 --> 00:04:52,636
where I get a little bit more
respect. Where's that, Al?
72
00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:55,960
A little town called
Anywhere But Here.
73
00:04:57,764 --> 00:05:01,311
Uh, Tim, you're a
big Pistons fan, right?
74
00:05:01,335 --> 00:05:03,646
Oh, yeah. One of the
all-time great auto parts.
75
00:05:03,670 --> 00:05:05,648
(grunts)
76
00:05:05,672 --> 00:05:09,085
No. I'm talking about the
basketball team. Mm-hmm.
77
00:05:09,109 --> 00:05:13,356
Yeah. How would you like
a couple of season tickets?
78
00:05:13,380 --> 00:05:16,458
You're gonna give me
season tickets? Yes, I am...
79
00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:19,729
Right after you pay
me for them. Huh?
80
00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:22,131
Yeah, you see, this guy I know
is selling me his court-side seats
81
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:25,435
so I thought I'd give my favorite
Tool Man first crack at my old ones.
82
00:05:25,459 --> 00:05:28,605
Oh, boy. Season
tickets. That is just...
83
00:05:28,629 --> 00:05:31,774
Yeah, yeah. Fifth
row, center court. Ooh!
84
00:05:31,798 --> 00:05:35,845
I mean, these seats are so good,
you can high-five with the team mascot.
85
00:05:35,869 --> 00:05:37,180
What? Yeah.
86
00:05:37,204 --> 00:05:40,349
Sir Slam-A-Lot! That's right.
87
00:05:40,373 --> 00:05:42,851
Oh, this is a dream, man.
This is really a dream -
88
00:05:42,875 --> 00:05:44,987
season tickets.
I'd better call Jill.
89
00:05:45,011 --> 00:05:47,123
Oh, no. No, no.
No time for that. No.
90
00:05:47,147 --> 00:05:49,192
See, a VP at General
Motors also wants them,
91
00:05:49,216 --> 00:05:51,694
and I'm meeting him for
lunch at about two o'clock.
92
00:05:51,718 --> 00:05:55,298
What time is it now? 1:59.
93
00:05:55,322 --> 00:05:57,566
Let me sleep on it. (snores)
94
00:05:57,590 --> 00:05:58,923
OK.
95
00:06:01,962 --> 00:06:03,706
Hike. He's out.
96
00:06:03,730 --> 00:06:06,376
He throws to the quarterback.
Turns around. Yeah!
97
00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:08,144
Touchdown! Touchdown.
98
00:06:08,168 --> 00:06:12,448
Hey, guys. You won't
believe what I bought today.
99
00:06:12,472 --> 00:06:14,083
Whoa! Pistons tickets.
100
00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:16,252
Not only Pistons
tickets - season tickets.
101
00:06:16,276 --> 00:06:19,422
And they're all mine,
mine, mine, mine.
102
00:06:19,446 --> 00:06:21,278
Wah-wah-wah-wah.
103
00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:26,595
You know, Dad,
I was just thinking
104
00:06:26,619 --> 00:06:31,267
that you and I really don't get to
spend enough quality time together.
105
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:35,238
I bet you figure we could bond
nicely at the Bulls/Pistons game.
106
00:06:35,262 --> 00:06:38,307
I want to bond at the
Orlando game. No, no.
107
00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:41,077
I gave that ticket
to Nick Cantalupo.
108
00:06:41,101 --> 00:06:45,115
Who's he? A very angry man.
109
00:06:45,139 --> 00:06:46,482
Is Mom home? Nope.
110
00:06:46,506 --> 00:06:48,484
She's with Mark
getting him new glasses.
111
00:06:48,508 --> 00:06:50,486
I can't believe she let you
buy these season tickets.
112
00:06:50,510 --> 00:06:52,544
What do you mean, "let" me?
113
00:06:54,281 --> 00:06:56,426
You didn't tell Mom? No.
114
00:06:56,450 --> 00:06:58,762
I knew it was too
good to be true.
115
00:06:58,786 --> 00:07:01,731
Hold it, hold it. There's
nothing to worry about.
116
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,900
Let me explain how
this marriage works.
117
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:08,504
Your mom and I don't need to
talk over every decision, you know.
118
00:07:08,528 --> 00:07:10,673
Why can't I get contact lenses?
119
00:07:10,697 --> 00:07:12,675
I didn't say that you couldn't.
120
00:07:12,699 --> 00:07:17,414
I said that we have to
check with your father first.
121
00:07:17,438 --> 00:07:20,149
That's how our marriage works.
122
00:07:20,173 --> 00:07:24,154
We don't make decisions without
checking with each other. Hi.
123
00:07:24,178 --> 00:07:27,022
Well, unless the decision had to be
made in under a minute, you know,
124
00:07:27,046 --> 00:07:29,925
'cause if both partners agree
on principal that there are...
125
00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:32,428
You know, autonomous decisions
are not bad thing between...
126
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:35,664
It's not unusual for a partner
to make a decision without...
127
00:07:35,688 --> 00:07:38,667
It does happen in a marriage
that you can make those...
128
00:07:38,691 --> 00:07:40,236
It does... You can...
129
00:07:40,260 --> 00:07:42,293
(clears throat)
130
00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:47,677
Boys, will you excuse
us for a moment, please?
131
00:07:47,701 --> 00:07:50,602
Good luck, Dad. Think bonding.
132
00:07:53,340 --> 00:07:55,351
OK, Tim.
133
00:07:55,375 --> 00:07:58,354
What did you buy and
how little do we need it?
134
00:07:58,378 --> 00:07:59,989
It's no big deal.
135
00:08:00,013 --> 00:08:03,326
Bud offered me some Pistons
tickets, so I bought them.
136
00:08:03,350 --> 00:08:07,030
How much were they? $50 apiece.
137
00:08:07,054 --> 00:08:10,688
Well, that's not so bad.
No, it's not. Here we go.
138
00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:15,004
How many games? All of them.
139
00:08:15,028 --> 00:08:17,206
What?
140
00:08:17,230 --> 00:08:20,443
All of them.
141
00:08:20,467 --> 00:08:22,211
How many games is that?
142
00:08:22,235 --> 00:08:24,902
Well, more than
none and less than 41.
143
00:08:27,140 --> 00:08:31,153
40 games at $50 apiece?
That's, like, $2,000!
144
00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:33,789
Per seat. Per seat?
145
00:08:33,813 --> 00:08:35,558
How many seats did you buy?
146
00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:38,282
One... and the one next to it.
147
00:08:40,787 --> 00:08:44,634
Two seats! That's...
that's $4,000!
148
00:08:44,658 --> 00:08:46,335
Unless they get in the
play-offs, 'cause for some reason,
149
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:50,106
play-off tickets are more
money than regular seats. More?
150
00:08:50,130 --> 00:08:53,443
It is ridiculous. I'm
gonna send them a letter.
151
00:08:53,467 --> 00:08:55,833
And send it from a new address!
152
00:08:58,037 --> 00:09:00,450
Let's not even worry about
the play-offs. It's too far away.
153
00:09:00,474 --> 00:09:04,020
They'll never make it! What am I talking
about? They're a lousy team this year.
154
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:07,846
You spent $4,000
on a lousy team?
155
00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:12,495
Let me explain something to
you about basketball. All right.
156
00:09:12,519 --> 00:09:16,031
You cannot get season tickets
like this with a good team.
157
00:09:16,055 --> 00:09:20,670
You gotta ride out the bad
years, hoping for a good one.
158
00:09:20,694 --> 00:09:23,072
That's what you said 17
years ago when I married you,
159
00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:26,197
and I'm still waiting
for a good one.
160
00:09:27,767 --> 00:09:30,246
(mock laughter)
161
00:09:30,270 --> 00:09:32,915
I can't believe that you
made a decision like this
162
00:09:32,939 --> 00:09:34,883
without discussing
it with me first.
163
00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:36,852
Well, Bud needed
an answer right away.
164
00:09:36,876 --> 00:09:39,288
And you buy a lot of
stuff without asking me.
165
00:09:39,312 --> 00:09:41,023
Like what?
166
00:09:41,047 --> 00:09:43,192
This couch.
167
00:09:43,216 --> 00:09:46,629
How can you compare the two? I bought
the couch because we need a place to sit!
168
00:09:46,653 --> 00:09:50,088
That's why I bought the tickets. I want
to go to the game. I need a place to sit.
169
00:09:52,859 --> 00:09:55,271
This money is supposed
to be for education.
170
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:57,874
For my graduate school,
the kids' college funds...
171
00:09:57,898 --> 00:10:00,709
I'm not gonna dip into the college
fund. We'll get the money someplace else.
172
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:03,446
Where? Well, you
know, I wouldn't...
173
00:10:03,470 --> 00:10:06,716
I wouldn't mind giving up
that vacation we had planned.
174
00:10:06,740 --> 00:10:09,251
Oh, that's big of you. You didn't
care about going to New York anyway.
175
00:10:09,275 --> 00:10:12,956
We don't have to now, 'cause the
New York Knicks are coming to town.
176
00:10:12,980 --> 00:10:15,358
And the Washington
Bullets, the Boston Celtics -
177
00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:19,283
the entire Eastern seaboard'll
be right here in Motor City!
178
00:10:22,055 --> 00:10:24,600
Don't look at me like that.
179
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:28,438
Then put the money
back in the bank account.
180
00:10:28,462 --> 00:10:31,240
Did I explain that, from
where these seats are,
181
00:10:31,264 --> 00:10:34,076
you can actually reach out and
touch the mascot, Sir... (door slams)
182
00:10:34,100 --> 00:10:36,100
Slam-A-Lot?
183
00:10:41,742 --> 00:10:44,787
Hey, guys. Hey.
How're you doing, Harry?
184
00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:48,758
Oh, what a surprise.
Benny's still here. Hey, Al.
185
00:10:48,782 --> 00:10:51,861
So, did you take your mother-in-law
to get her bunions removed?
186
00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:53,996
Yeah. But I'd rather
have kept the bunions
187
00:10:54,020 --> 00:10:57,000
and had my
mother-in-law removed.
188
00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:58,667
Hey, Harry.
189
00:10:58,691 --> 00:11:01,137
You hear Tim picked up
season tickets to the Pistons?
190
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,072
I just hope it doesn't
go to his head.
191
00:11:03,096 --> 00:11:05,708
A guy gets season tickets, it
could affect his whole demeanor.
192
00:11:05,732 --> 00:11:08,111
Nah. Tim isn't like that.
193
00:11:08,135 --> 00:11:10,813
Yeah. Besides,
people only change
194
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:14,005
if you treat them different.
And we're not gonna do that.
195
00:11:15,375 --> 00:11:17,386
Hey, guys. Hey!
196
00:11:17,410 --> 00:11:19,755
Hey! Good to see you, man! Hey!
197
00:11:19,779 --> 00:11:22,424
Get him a cup of
coffee and a bear claw.
198
00:11:22,448 --> 00:11:24,660
He takes sugar in that
coffee. My pleasure.
199
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:28,931
It would be an honor
to serve my best friend.
200
00:11:28,955 --> 00:11:32,001
Does me being your best friend have
anything to do with having season tickets?
201
00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:36,071
The two things
are not unrelated.
202
00:11:36,095 --> 00:11:38,107
Hey, well, look, he's
taking me to the game first
203
00:11:38,131 --> 00:11:40,009
because I'm his hardware guy.
204
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:42,812
No. If anyone deserves to
go, it's me. I'm his brother.
205
00:11:42,836 --> 00:11:45,481
Excuse me. I'm the one
that risks his life every day
206
00:11:45,505 --> 00:11:47,705
working next to him.
207
00:11:49,476 --> 00:11:51,920
Uh, the man's got
a point. All right, OK.
208
00:11:51,944 --> 00:11:53,856
But I'm next after Al.
209
00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:57,782
Well, maybe none of you are going,
because maybe I'm not keeping the tickets.
210
00:11:59,586 --> 00:12:02,464
Why would you give
up season tickets?
211
00:12:02,488 --> 00:12:05,401
When I went home and told Jill I
bought them, she got mad and...
212
00:12:05,425 --> 00:12:07,203
she gave me the look. Ooh.
213
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:09,072
Not the look. What's the look?
214
00:12:09,096 --> 00:12:12,875
Oh, come on. It's just the most
potent weapon in a woman's arsenal.
215
00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:16,045
Her face will transform
right in front of you.
216
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:20,116
Her lips get really
tight like this.
217
00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:23,140
Yeah. And then her whole
face shrivels up. It's like...
218
00:12:24,478 --> 00:12:27,055
Yeah. And then her
eyes get real small
219
00:12:27,079 --> 00:12:31,382
and meet right in the middle of her
head like a Cyclops in a housecoat.
220
00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:35,397
Just when you think
you can't take anymore,
221
00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:38,656
she lines you up
and finishes you off.
222
00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:41,938
Ohh!
223
00:12:41,962 --> 00:12:43,940
I'm never getting married.
224
00:12:43,964 --> 00:12:47,777
And not just because
women can't stand me.
225
00:12:47,801 --> 00:12:50,546
I hate the look.
226
00:12:50,570 --> 00:12:54,383
What do you know about the
look? You're not even married.
227
00:12:54,407 --> 00:12:57,342
I get the look when
I'm snippy to Mother.
228
00:13:05,484 --> 00:13:09,053
But in your mom's case, the
look's actually an improvement.
229
00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:12,635
Hey, Tim, you have
to keep the tickets.
230
00:13:12,659 --> 00:13:15,904
You know, I don't think I can. No, I
don't know if this is gonna be worth it.
231
00:13:15,928 --> 00:13:18,640
Every time I go to a Pistons
game, I'm gonna get the look.
232
00:13:18,664 --> 00:13:21,243
Yeah. And what about the look
you're gonna get when you come home?
233
00:13:21,267 --> 00:13:23,745
(shudders)
234
00:13:23,769 --> 00:13:27,349
That's two looks per game.
235
00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:30,753
Times 40 games, that's 80 looks.
236
00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:34,824
And that doesn't count the looks I
get for just doing normal bad things.
237
00:13:34,848 --> 00:13:36,925
Yeah. But you gotta
stand your ground, Tim.
238
00:13:36,949 --> 00:13:38,995
You can't let your
wife intimidate you.
239
00:13:39,019 --> 00:13:40,529
Harry! Dolores!
240
00:13:40,553 --> 00:13:43,198
Uh, what are you doing here?
241
00:13:43,222 --> 00:13:45,200
You want to know
what I'm doing here?
242
00:13:45,224 --> 00:13:47,202
I'll tell you what
I'm doing here.
243
00:13:47,226 --> 00:13:50,505
You all remember my
lovely wife, Dolores.
244
00:13:50,529 --> 00:13:54,076
Hi. Nice seeing
you. How are you?
245
00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:56,378
How could you drop my
mother off at the podiatrist
246
00:13:56,402 --> 00:13:58,013
and just leave her there?
247
00:13:58,037 --> 00:14:00,349
I gave her bus fare.
248
00:14:00,373 --> 00:14:02,751
She just called. She can't
even get her shoes on.
249
00:14:02,775 --> 00:14:05,688
Go back and pick her
up. Why can't you do it?
250
00:14:05,712 --> 00:14:08,757
I'm in the middle of a
shift. Well, I'm working too.
251
00:14:08,781 --> 00:14:12,461
Yeah, right. Looks like
you're killing yourself.
252
00:14:12,485 --> 00:14:15,552
Harry, I'm telling
you to go get her.
253
00:14:18,624 --> 00:14:21,270
I'm telling you no.
254
00:14:21,294 --> 00:14:23,728
Look out, guys. Here it comes.
255
00:14:49,122 --> 00:14:51,121
Oh, my God!
256
00:14:55,028 --> 00:14:58,173
I've never seen
anything like it.
257
00:14:58,197 --> 00:15:03,378
Where's the podiatrist?
I'll go get her myself.
258
00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:06,382
Listen, I'll drive you there.
259
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:08,572
I'll show you the way!
260
00:15:14,847 --> 00:15:18,894
Thank goodness we shut our
eyes at the right time, Marty.
261
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:21,097
Man, they're
dropping like flies.
262
00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:24,367
Hey, Tim. You
gotta stand up to Jill.
263
00:15:24,391 --> 00:15:26,402
Oh. No, no.
264
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:30,172
'Cause every time one of us
gets beaten down by the look...
265
00:15:30,196 --> 00:15:33,376
a little piece of
every man dies.
266
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:37,000
And I think we all
know what that piece is.
267
00:15:45,378 --> 00:15:49,691
My contact lens has to be
around here somewhere.
268
00:15:49,715 --> 00:15:51,060
Way to go, Mark.
269
00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:53,128
The contact has spent
more time on the floor
270
00:15:53,152 --> 00:15:55,865
than it has in your eyes.
271
00:15:55,889 --> 00:15:57,900
Anybody home?
272
00:15:57,924 --> 00:15:59,302
Hey, guys. Hey, Dad.
273
00:15:59,326 --> 00:16:01,270
(Brad) Hey, Dad. Well...
274
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:04,796
I don't care what
you're playing, but I'm in.
275
00:16:06,766 --> 00:16:09,478
It's called "Looking
for Mark's Contact."
276
00:16:09,502 --> 00:16:11,502
How do you play?
277
00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:16,085
You look for Mark's contact.
278
00:16:16,109 --> 00:16:18,409
OK. Whose turn?
279
00:16:19,913 --> 00:16:23,580
OK, Dad. It's yours.
OK, one, two, three... go!
280
00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:28,752
(Brad chuckles)
281
00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:35,171
Wait, I found it!
282
00:16:35,195 --> 00:16:38,174
It was in my eye the whole time.
283
00:16:38,198 --> 00:16:41,232
Well, if you're gonna cheat...
284
00:16:44,804 --> 00:16:47,149
So, Dad, what's happening
with the basketball tickets?
285
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:49,685
Yeah, have you caved in?
I'm not giving up the tickets.
286
00:16:49,709 --> 00:16:53,155
'Cause if I do, a little
piece of every man dies.
287
00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:55,546
Which piece?
288
00:16:56,982 --> 00:16:59,561
You just never mind.
289
00:16:59,585 --> 00:17:01,964
Tim, we need to talk. Boys?
290
00:17:01,988 --> 00:17:04,088
We know, we know.
291
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:08,403
OK.
292
00:17:08,427 --> 00:17:10,405
I was thinking about
this thing with the tickets,
293
00:17:10,429 --> 00:17:12,541
and maybe I was a little unfair.
294
00:17:12,565 --> 00:17:15,644
Really? I know how
important they are to you.
295
00:17:15,668 --> 00:17:19,014
So I think I've come up with
a really good compromise.
296
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:22,751
How about you keep
the tickets for five games,
297
00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:24,419
and you sell off the rest?
298
00:17:24,443 --> 00:17:26,489
Five out of 40? You
call that a compromise?
299
00:17:26,513 --> 00:17:28,791
That's $500. I
think that's fair.
300
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:31,793
Maybe you don't understand the concept
here, honey. These are season tickets,
301
00:17:31,817 --> 00:17:35,431
not whenever-your-wife-
wants-you-to-go tickets.
302
00:17:35,455 --> 00:17:37,466
So what are you saying?
You're not willing to budge at all?
303
00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:39,735
If I give up my season
tickets because of my wife,
304
00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:41,470
other wives are
gonna pick up on this.
305
00:17:41,494 --> 00:17:44,607
Pretty soon, wives everywhere
are gonna be going, "You know,
306
00:17:44,631 --> 00:17:49,032
the Tool Man gave up his
season tickets. You should too."
307
00:17:50,303 --> 00:17:52,581
Attendance starts
dropping at stadiums.
308
00:17:52,605 --> 00:17:53,916
Next thing we know,
309
00:17:53,940 --> 00:17:57,253
it's the end of professional
sports worldwide.
310
00:17:57,277 --> 00:18:01,223
You are just completely
unwilling to compromise!
311
00:18:01,247 --> 00:18:05,361
Yeah. I don't even know the
meaning of the word "compromise."
312
00:18:05,385 --> 00:18:08,953
You don't know the
meaning to a lot of words.
313
00:18:10,723 --> 00:18:13,324
And don't you forget it.
314
00:18:31,744 --> 00:18:34,957
Hey, Wilson. Well,
hi-dee-ho, neighbor.
315
00:18:34,981 --> 00:18:37,982
What are you doing?
I'm barbecuing some jerk.
316
00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:42,164
Anybody I know?
317
00:18:42,188 --> 00:18:44,233
Actually, jerk is
a very spicy dish
318
00:18:44,257 --> 00:18:46,268
native to the island of Jamaica.
319
00:18:46,292 --> 00:18:48,137
You know, I'm thinking
of going down there
320
00:18:48,161 --> 00:18:50,139
and doing a little
bamboo rafting.
321
00:18:50,163 --> 00:18:53,776
Well, you got it made.
Unattached guy like you...
322
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,946
You don't need permission
to go to 40 Pistons games.
323
00:18:56,970 --> 00:18:58,970
Uh-oh.
324
00:19:00,773 --> 00:19:04,153
I take it Jill was not too thrilled
with your recent purchase.
325
00:19:04,177 --> 00:19:10,825
That's putting it mildly.
First, she gave me the look.
326
00:19:10,849 --> 00:19:13,429
The look!
327
00:19:13,453 --> 00:19:18,400
You know about the look? Oh,
Tim, every man knows about the look.
328
00:19:18,424 --> 00:19:21,871
Wives have been giving their
husbands the look for untold centuries.
329
00:19:21,895 --> 00:19:25,140
As a matter of fact, the look was the
reason that brides started wearing veils.
330
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:28,710
It was long believed that
the penetrating stare of a bride
331
00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:32,836
could weaken her husband
and render him impotent.
332
00:19:34,874 --> 00:19:39,421
I thought that was caused by all
the brown liquor at the reception.
333
00:19:39,445 --> 00:19:41,824
Well, that could do it too, Tim.
334
00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:44,793
I gotta be honest with you.
Jill's look did weaken me.
335
00:19:44,817 --> 00:19:46,362
It did.
336
00:19:46,386 --> 00:19:48,830
But I didn't break. Ah.
337
00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:52,701
Then she brought out the sneakiest,
most underhanded trick in the book.
338
00:19:52,725 --> 00:19:55,437
What was that? Compromise.
339
00:19:55,461 --> 00:19:57,439
Ah!
340
00:19:57,463 --> 00:20:00,142
The old ploy where both
sides decide to be reasonable.
341
00:20:00,166 --> 00:20:03,712
Reasonable? Five games out of
40 is reasonable? I don't think...
342
00:20:03,736 --> 00:20:06,715
What was your counteroffer?
I don't think that applies here.
343
00:20:06,739 --> 00:20:09,552
Because you didn't
make one. No, I did not.
344
00:20:09,576 --> 00:20:12,754
You know, Tim, I'm reminded of
an old philosopher who once said:
345
00:20:12,778 --> 00:20:15,491
"You have to give
a little, take a little..
346
00:20:15,515 --> 00:20:18,215
"Let your poor
heart break a little."
347
00:20:20,853 --> 00:20:22,865
♪ That's the story of
348
00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:26,235
♪ That's the glory of love ♪
349
00:20:26,259 --> 00:20:28,604
All right, Nick. You got
Atlanta on the second.
350
00:20:28,628 --> 00:20:32,474
Got it. I want Seattle
on the 15th of November.
351
00:20:32,498 --> 00:20:34,076
All right, Al.
You got it, buddy.
352
00:20:34,100 --> 00:20:36,245
OK. But I want the
Bulls on January 21st.
353
00:20:36,269 --> 00:20:38,714
January 21st is our anniversary.
354
00:20:38,738 --> 00:20:42,718
Well, guess where we're going.
355
00:20:42,742 --> 00:20:44,386
Over my dead body.
356
00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:48,624
Well, at least for once it'll
be nice and quiet in the car.
357
00:20:48,648 --> 00:20:52,494
Dolores, I'll take the
Bulls. I'll go with you.
358
00:20:52,518 --> 00:20:55,564
If you got the Bulls, I'm
taking Houston. I'll go with you.
359
00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:58,601
I want Phoenix.
I'll go with you.
360
00:20:58,625 --> 00:21:00,269
I don't even know you.
361
00:21:00,293 --> 00:21:03,293
Who really knows anybody?
362
00:21:05,030 --> 00:21:08,143
Well, hi, everyone.
Hi, honey. Um...
363
00:21:08,167 --> 00:21:09,878
Watch the board
for a minute. Sure.
364
00:21:09,902 --> 00:21:13,381
What's going on? Um...
365
00:21:13,405 --> 00:21:15,650
I decided to compromise.
366
00:21:15,674 --> 00:21:17,719
You did?
367
00:21:17,743 --> 00:21:21,056
You gotta give a
little, take a little...
368
00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:24,827
Uh... Want me to sing it?
369
00:21:24,851 --> 00:21:27,028
Not really.
370
00:21:27,052 --> 00:21:29,932
But I would like to hear some
more about this compromise.
371
00:21:29,956 --> 00:21:31,233
OK.
372
00:21:31,257 --> 00:21:33,702
I wanted all 40.
You wanted five.
373
00:21:33,726 --> 00:21:36,438
What do you say we settle on 15?
374
00:21:36,462 --> 00:21:39,241
Fifteen's still a lot of money.
375
00:21:39,265 --> 00:21:41,744
Let's settle on ten.
How about eight?
376
00:21:41,768 --> 00:21:43,545
Ten. How about none?
377
00:21:43,569 --> 00:21:45,981
Eight's good.
378
00:21:46,005 --> 00:21:47,283
OK.
379
00:21:47,307 --> 00:21:50,552
Tim, could we see you
for a second here? Yeah?
380
00:21:50,576 --> 00:21:52,421
Harry's got an
interesting point.
381
00:21:52,445 --> 00:21:54,756
What if by some chance the
Pistons get into the play-offs?
382
00:21:54,780 --> 00:21:56,592
How do we divvy
up those tickets?
383
00:21:56,616 --> 00:21:59,160
The play-offs are gonna cost
more money anyway, right?
384
00:21:59,184 --> 00:22:02,398
I already got my eight
tickets. You guys fight over 'em.
385
00:22:02,422 --> 00:22:03,966
You're giving up
play-off tickets?
386
00:22:03,990 --> 00:22:08,704
Yes, Marty. Because I
know "The Glory of Love."
387
00:22:08,728 --> 00:22:10,572
Want me to sing it?
388
00:22:10,596 --> 00:22:14,176
No, thank you.
389
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:18,113
If the Pistons make the
play-offs, can I buy some games?
390
00:22:18,137 --> 00:22:20,182
What do you want with
play-off games, honey?
391
00:22:20,206 --> 00:22:22,383
I'm gonna take my husband.
392
00:22:22,407 --> 00:22:26,722
Hey. Your husband's
a very lucky man.
393
00:22:26,746 --> 00:22:30,526
How come you never say
anything nice like that to me?
394
00:22:30,550 --> 00:22:33,584
Your husband isn't as lucky.
395
00:22:40,259 --> 00:22:42,470
I want the Knicks
on February 21st.
396
00:22:42,494 --> 00:22:44,206
Oh, I hate the Knicks.
397
00:22:44,230 --> 00:22:47,042
I'll go with you.
398
00:22:47,066 --> 00:22:50,112
Oh, sorry, Dolores.
That's one of my eight.
399
00:22:50,136 --> 00:22:52,915
I'm from New York,
and I want the Knicks.
400
00:22:52,939 --> 00:22:54,516
Well, twiddle-dee-dee.
I'm from Detroit,
401
00:22:54,540 --> 00:22:56,418
and I like the Knicks.
I'm not selling them.
402
00:22:56,442 --> 00:22:58,442
Oh, really?
403
00:23:07,853 --> 00:23:11,388
She is good. Really good.
404
00:23:13,692 --> 00:23:16,405
I'm telling you no!
405
00:23:16,429 --> 00:23:18,862
Look out, guys. Here it comes.
405
00:23:19,305 --> 00:24:19,417
Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org