1 00:00:02,036 --> 00:00:05,670 Tim, why is it always... Quiet. Pretend like it didn't happen. 2 00:00:11,211 --> 00:00:14,758 Welcome back to a new segment here on Tool Time - The Resourceful Tool Man. 3 00:00:14,782 --> 00:00:18,222 Where we show you how a tool man can be... resourceful. 4 00:00:21,789 --> 00:00:23,522 And redundant. 5 00:00:28,829 --> 00:00:31,463 Today the resourceful tool man goes to the kitchen. 6 00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:37,981 Say you have a hankering for cheese and crackers. 7 00:00:38,005 --> 00:00:39,783 But every knife is filthy. 8 00:00:39,807 --> 00:00:43,020 Your wife's not there to wash them. So, what are you gonna do? 9 00:00:43,044 --> 00:00:45,789 You could clean one yourself. 10 00:00:45,813 --> 00:00:50,460 Al, I'll do the jokes. 11 00:00:50,484 --> 00:00:53,930 Or you could run upstairs to the bathroom and get some dental floss. 12 00:00:53,954 --> 00:00:56,599 Heidi, my dental floss, please. Here you are, Tim. 13 00:00:56,623 --> 00:00:58,168 Thank you. You're welcome. 14 00:00:58,192 --> 00:01:00,270 Use unwaxed for your softer cheeses. 15 00:01:00,294 --> 00:01:03,194 Waxed for your cheddars and Gouda. 16 00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:09,434 Nobody cuts the cheese like Al. 17 00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:15,852 OK, now, let's say your wife's a little ticked at ya 18 00:01:15,876 --> 00:01:19,555 because instead of fixing the stove, you blew it up. 19 00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:22,092 She's saying, (high voice) "What are we gonna do now? 20 00:01:22,116 --> 00:01:25,929 Poach the fish in what, you lunkhead? What am I gonna do?" 21 00:01:25,953 --> 00:01:29,521 (high voice) "I have a 12-pound fish and it's all gonna go to waste." 22 00:01:31,459 --> 00:01:34,604 What? I don't do a woman's voice as well as you? 23 00:01:34,628 --> 00:01:37,662 No. You do it a little too well. 24 00:01:39,833 --> 00:01:44,214 The resourceful tool man doesn't need a working stove to make a delicious meal. 25 00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:46,449 Exactly, Al. All you need is heat and steam. 26 00:01:46,473 --> 00:01:49,419 And what better way to use that than in the dishwasher? 27 00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:52,455 Here's your fresh piece of salmon, Tim. Thank you, Heidi. 28 00:01:52,479 --> 00:01:55,858 Aah! There's a piece of fish! 29 00:01:55,882 --> 00:01:58,784 I'm gonna season my fish with a little dill. 30 00:02:00,754 --> 00:02:03,900 Fold the tinfoil, and set it on the top shelf in the dishwasher. 31 00:02:03,924 --> 00:02:06,970 Making sure to hit the dry cycle. And in 25 minutes, 32 00:02:06,994 --> 00:02:09,206 you have a perfectly poached fish. 33 00:02:09,230 --> 00:02:12,108 We don't have to wait. We have a fish in there. 34 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:14,110 When it's done, we'll pull it out. (bell dings) 35 00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:16,446 There it is. 36 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:19,282 You hungry, Al? I'm famished. 37 00:02:19,306 --> 00:02:21,339 All right! 38 00:02:28,816 --> 00:02:31,061 Did you hit dry cycle? 39 00:02:31,085 --> 00:02:33,919 Oh, I went with the pot scrubber. 40 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:41,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 41 00:03:23,937 --> 00:03:26,449 Randy, the haircut is fine. 42 00:03:26,473 --> 00:03:28,372 You're just a little over-moussed. 43 00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:38,995 I need this out of my hair before someone sees me. 44 00:03:39,019 --> 00:03:42,332 Yeah. Hey, Randy! Great haircut. 45 00:03:42,356 --> 00:03:45,916 Looks like Dad when he tried to soup up the toaster. 46 00:03:47,661 --> 00:03:52,709 Brad, there is a perfectly fine haircut under there... somewhere. 47 00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:55,478 I'm gonna go shampoo and see if I can find it. 48 00:03:55,502 --> 00:03:57,414 How was school? Great. 49 00:03:57,438 --> 00:03:59,883 I can't wait for history class tomorrow. 50 00:03:59,907 --> 00:04:03,420 Wow, it's nice to hear you talk like that! What are you studying? 51 00:04:03,444 --> 00:04:06,004 This new girl, Angela Lawson. 52 00:04:07,648 --> 00:04:09,892 I'm home. (Jill) Hi, sweetie. 53 00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:12,062 Hey, Dad. Hey, Brad. How's it going? 54 00:04:12,086 --> 00:04:14,630 Great. I can't wait to go to school tomorrow. 55 00:04:14,654 --> 00:04:16,288 New girl? Yup. 56 00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:19,636 (phone ringing) 57 00:04:19,660 --> 00:04:22,738 I got it. It's for me. 58 00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:27,576 Hello? Oh, hi, Uncle Marty. Yeah, he's right here. 59 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,212 Try not to talk too long. 60 00:04:29,236 --> 00:04:31,756 I'm expecting a really important phone call. 61 00:04:33,673 --> 00:04:35,573 Yup. New girl. 62 00:04:37,644 --> 00:04:41,257 Get a haircut, will you? Hey, Marty. How's it going? 63 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,193 Oh, no, Marty. No. 64 00:04:43,217 --> 00:04:46,128 What's wrong? He lost his job. 65 00:04:46,152 --> 00:04:47,597 That's too bad. Yeah. What'd the guy... 66 00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:50,300 Dad, could you hurry? I have to call Angela. 67 00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:53,936 Your uncle just lost his job. I know. 68 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:57,600 I just thought Angela's the kind of girl I could share my grief with. 69 00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:02,634 (beeping) 70 00:05:16,449 --> 00:05:19,829 It doesn't work on the rinse cycle either. 71 00:05:19,853 --> 00:05:21,031 (doorbell rings) 72 00:05:21,055 --> 00:05:22,932 I got it. All right. 73 00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:25,068 Hey, Brad. Hi, Uncle Marty. 74 00:05:25,092 --> 00:05:27,637 How're you doing? Good. 75 00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:29,872 You were supposed to call after the interview. 76 00:05:29,896 --> 00:05:32,442 I tried. The phone's been busy for hours. 77 00:05:32,466 --> 00:05:35,211 Brad, I asked you to stay off the phone, didn't I? 78 00:05:35,235 --> 00:05:37,514 It's not fair that you always assume it was me. 79 00:05:37,538 --> 00:05:38,782 Was it? 80 00:05:38,806 --> 00:05:40,872 Yeah. But it still isn't fair. 81 00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:47,924 Hey, Marty, something to drink? Beer? Mug of fish? 82 00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:49,614 Um, beer. 83 00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:55,531 So, how'd the interview go? Oh, it went great. 84 00:05:55,555 --> 00:05:59,269 The guy and I hit it off. Says I'm qualified. I remind him of his nephew. 85 00:05:59,293 --> 00:06:02,305 You got the job? No. He hired the nephew. 86 00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:06,075 Pretty tough out there, isn't it? Mm, you're telling me. 87 00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:08,010 Come on. Sit down. 88 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:13,016 I've had so many doors slammed in my face, I need a doorstop on my nose. 89 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:16,586 Well, Binford makes a nice one. 90 00:06:16,610 --> 00:06:19,756 Speaking of that, I've been thinking about it. 91 00:06:19,780 --> 00:06:22,892 We're building a new set for Tool Time, and we could use help. 92 00:06:22,916 --> 00:06:25,161 You offering me a job? It's nothing much. 93 00:06:25,185 --> 00:06:28,686 I'll take it! Well, I'll need some references. 94 00:06:30,757 --> 00:06:32,569 What? You're my reference. 95 00:06:32,593 --> 00:06:36,339 No wonder you haven't found any work. Oh, yeah. 96 00:06:36,363 --> 00:06:39,375 Hey, Marty. How's the job hunt? Oh, it's terrific. 97 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:41,377 Yeah? It's over. 98 00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:45,448 That's great. What will you be doing? I'm working for Tim. 99 00:06:45,472 --> 00:06:48,217 Great! 100 00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:50,186 We haven't worked together since we were kids. 101 00:06:50,210 --> 00:06:53,857 Remember that little stand? What a great team we were! 102 00:06:53,881 --> 00:06:57,193 A lemonade stand. That's so cute. 103 00:06:57,217 --> 00:07:01,197 Right. It was a lube and oil change stand. Of course. 104 00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:04,166 We were a great team back then. Yeah. It was great. 105 00:07:04,190 --> 00:07:06,702 Hey, I gotta go home and tell Nancy to stop crying. 106 00:07:06,726 --> 00:07:08,270 I'll see you later. Yeah. 107 00:07:08,294 --> 00:07:11,240 And thanks, man. You're a lifesaver. Thank you. 108 00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:13,609 OK, bye. You can start tomorrow morning. 109 00:07:13,633 --> 00:07:15,332 Terrific. 110 00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:21,684 Hey, Al. Plans for the new Tool Time set. Take a look. 111 00:07:21,708 --> 00:07:24,621 Wow! We're dealing with more space. 112 00:07:24,645 --> 00:07:27,857 We're going modular. Our tools will be right at our fingertips. 113 00:07:27,881 --> 00:07:30,760 We've come a long way, my friend. 114 00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:34,831 Remember when we were just two crazy young tool men with a dream? 115 00:07:34,855 --> 00:07:40,303 Actually, Al, it was one tool man and an extra stool. 116 00:07:40,327 --> 00:07:42,872 You remember it your way, I'll remember it my way. 117 00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:45,608 Come on, it's a great time for us. Tool Time is taking off. 118 00:07:45,632 --> 00:07:48,444 My favorite brother's working for us. I envy you. 119 00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:52,115 I've always dreamed of working with my brother, Cal, side by side. 120 00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:54,840 Actually, that would be "wide by wide," wouldn't it? 121 00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:58,054 Hey, guys. 122 00:07:58,078 --> 00:08:00,089 There he is now. All right. Welcome aboard. 123 00:08:00,113 --> 00:08:03,092 Hey! Glad to be aboard, Al. Thanks. How're you doing? 124 00:08:03,116 --> 00:08:05,294 Sorry I'm late. I couldn't find my parking space. 125 00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:08,431 The reason for that is, Marty, you don't have a parking place. 126 00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:13,102 Don't feel bad. Neither do I. I've been here six years. 127 00:08:13,126 --> 00:08:16,172 Six years. Jeez, that's real fair, Tim. 128 00:08:16,196 --> 00:08:18,908 Well, it's a small parking lot, Marty. 129 00:08:18,932 --> 00:08:22,212 Yeah, but you have a space. Hey, I got an idea! 130 00:08:22,236 --> 00:08:24,736 Why don't you alternate with Al? That's a great idea! 131 00:08:27,374 --> 00:08:31,187 Marty, I didn't hire you as a parking lot consultant. 132 00:08:31,211 --> 00:08:34,090 You're here to help build the set. I know. I'm excited... 133 00:08:34,114 --> 00:08:36,425 no matter what my wife said. 134 00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:39,528 Probably what my wife said - brothers shouldn't work together. 135 00:08:39,552 --> 00:08:44,466 No, that brothers as immature as us shouldn't work together. 136 00:08:44,490 --> 00:08:46,169 We'll show them, won't we? 137 00:08:46,193 --> 00:08:48,437 (goofy laughing) 138 00:08:48,461 --> 00:08:51,941 Why don't you drop your gear in the back, pick up an extra tool belt? 139 00:08:51,965 --> 00:08:54,510 Morning, guys. Hey, Heidi. 140 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:58,370 Hey, who parked in my space? Heidi has a parking space?! 141 00:09:02,108 --> 00:09:04,086 What do you want me to do next? 142 00:09:04,110 --> 00:09:05,588 Help Al bring that wood over here. 143 00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:08,157 We'll start on the interview desk. 144 00:09:08,181 --> 00:09:09,792 Hey, is that rosewood? 145 00:09:09,816 --> 00:09:12,695 Honduran rosewood. Isn't it great? 146 00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:15,898 Sure, if you don't mind pillaging the rain forest. 147 00:09:15,922 --> 00:09:17,767 We're not pillaging the rain forest. 148 00:09:17,791 --> 00:09:20,837 This wood was grown by farmers specifically for commercial use. 149 00:09:20,861 --> 00:09:23,406 That's what they always say. But did you check it out? 150 00:09:23,430 --> 00:09:27,109 Well, of course we did, Marty. While you were eating your sandwich, 151 00:09:27,133 --> 00:09:30,179 Al and I drove down to Honduras. 152 00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:34,950 Pardon me for caring. Pardon me for getting the job done. 153 00:09:34,974 --> 00:09:37,686 Sorry I'm slowing you up. I was expressing my opinion. 154 00:09:37,710 --> 00:09:39,855 My opinion is, keep your opinion to yourself. 155 00:09:39,879 --> 00:09:41,190 That's your opinion. Uh-huh. 156 00:09:41,214 --> 00:09:43,560 Guys, guys... Al, stay out of this. 157 00:09:43,584 --> 00:09:45,865 You'll be parking in Honduras, OK? 158 00:09:56,462 --> 00:09:58,774 You're doing it again. 159 00:09:58,798 --> 00:10:00,843 I hate it when you look over my shoulder. 160 00:10:00,867 --> 00:10:04,880 I can't look under your shoulder. I get that horrible armpit smell. 161 00:10:04,904 --> 00:10:06,971 I can smell yours all across the room. 162 00:10:14,914 --> 00:10:17,860 All right, what? What is it? What's the problem? 163 00:10:17,884 --> 00:10:20,129 You're glopping, Marty. I'm not glopping. 164 00:10:20,153 --> 00:10:22,631 You're glopping. I am not. I know how to paint. 165 00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:25,801 You're glopping right now. I am not. It's fine. They're fine. 166 00:10:25,825 --> 00:10:31,274 Boys, boys, remember what you said? Brothers getting along, being mature? 167 00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:35,344 All right, I'm sorry I was criticizing you. It's just... 168 00:10:35,368 --> 00:10:40,516 when I notice somebody painting in a "glop-esque" manner 169 00:10:40,540 --> 00:10:44,754 that can result in peghole pluggage... 170 00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:48,357 Well, your point is well taken, Tim. Thank you. 171 00:10:48,381 --> 00:10:53,296 However, one could also argue that peghole pluggage 172 00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:58,668 could easily be remedied with toothpick pokage. 173 00:10:58,692 --> 00:11:02,038 Toothpick pokage? Go back over the job twice? You gotta... 174 00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:07,398 I say we stop this arguing and we settle this with a group huggage. 175 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:18,810 Whoa! Here comes Brad with his new girlfriend. 176 00:11:21,214 --> 00:11:23,147 Hello! 177 00:11:25,284 --> 00:11:28,097 Man! What's she doing with a guy like him? 178 00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:32,034 Guys, guys, get away from the window. Stop spying on your brother. 179 00:11:32,058 --> 00:11:35,204 Whoa, she is cute! 180 00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:36,471 Mom... 181 00:11:36,495 --> 00:11:38,975 Wait, wait. Act natural, they're coming. 182 00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:44,580 Hey, everybody. 183 00:11:44,604 --> 00:11:47,149 Everybody, this is Angela. Randy, Mark and my mom. 184 00:11:47,173 --> 00:11:49,819 Well, hi. It's nice to meet you. You, too. 185 00:11:49,843 --> 00:11:53,456 I heard that you just moved to town. 186 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:54,957 How are you liking it so far? 187 00:11:54,981 --> 00:11:57,626 At first I didn't, 'cause, like, I didn't have friends. 188 00:11:57,650 --> 00:12:00,797 But I started to make, like, friends. Then I was, like, popular. 189 00:12:00,821 --> 00:12:03,999 I love being really popular 'cause back home the only popular girls 190 00:12:04,023 --> 00:12:06,669 were the cheerleaders. But I have really weak ankles. 191 00:12:06,693 --> 00:12:10,206 It was such a drag because I would look so hot in that outfit. 192 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:13,976 And I'm a really good speller. Does that answer your question? 193 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:16,801 That and so much more. 194 00:12:19,139 --> 00:12:21,617 Let's start our homework. Good idea. 195 00:12:21,641 --> 00:12:25,621 Let's start with History because that's the most boringest. French is more boring, 196 00:12:25,645 --> 00:12:29,225 but not as boring as French History... 197 00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:32,361 She's great, isn't she? 198 00:12:32,385 --> 00:12:35,465 Sure does talk a lot. 199 00:12:35,489 --> 00:12:38,768 She says a lot because she's, like, really popular. 200 00:12:38,792 --> 00:12:42,872 And you know how hard it is being real popular when you have, like, weak ankles. 201 00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:45,641 Randy, stop it. 202 00:12:45,665 --> 00:12:48,110 Oh, hi, sweetie. Hi. 203 00:12:48,134 --> 00:12:51,168 Mm. Well, how was your day with your favorite brother? 204 00:12:52,973 --> 00:12:57,253 Well, I guess it's a good time for the wife to say "I told you so." 205 00:12:57,277 --> 00:13:02,592 Oh, I don't want to take pleasure in the fact that I was right and you were wrong. 206 00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:06,629 Why? If I were ever right, I would. 207 00:13:06,653 --> 00:13:10,833 Well, then, I have nothing to worry about. So, what did he do? 208 00:13:10,857 --> 00:13:12,568 He complained all day. 209 00:13:12,592 --> 00:13:15,303 He took, like, six hours to chew his bologna sandwich. 210 00:13:15,327 --> 00:13:18,441 He got Al hopped up about not having a parking space. 211 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:23,111 Well, that's bad. Wait a minute. Al doesn't have a parking space? 212 00:13:23,135 --> 00:13:26,348 Why is everyone so concerned about where Al parks? 213 00:13:26,372 --> 00:13:28,417 What am I gonna do about Marty? 214 00:13:28,441 --> 00:13:30,886 Well, you don't have much choice. 215 00:13:30,910 --> 00:13:33,255 You'll have to figure out a way to make it work. 216 00:13:33,279 --> 00:13:36,159 Or I can fire him. You can't fire your own brother! 217 00:13:36,183 --> 00:13:38,427 I don't want another day like today. 218 00:13:38,451 --> 00:13:42,231 No more yakking or complaining the rest of the night. 219 00:13:42,255 --> 00:13:44,267 Do you have soda? Yeah. It's in the fridge. 220 00:13:44,291 --> 00:13:47,703 I can't have diet. My mom believes artificial sweeteners are bad. 221 00:13:47,727 --> 00:13:50,306 You have is root beer which is, like, really gross. 222 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:53,509 Or apple juice which is really bad for your teeth unless you water it down. 223 00:13:53,533 --> 00:13:56,467 So I'll just wait till I get home. Hi. 224 00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:07,323 Brad's new girlfriend? Uh-huh. 225 00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:09,380 Cute. 226 00:14:13,954 --> 00:14:15,864 Wilson? 227 00:14:15,888 --> 00:14:18,267 Well, hi-de-ho, neighbor. 228 00:14:18,291 --> 00:14:21,759 What are you doing? Tim, I'm practicing hurling. 229 00:14:24,096 --> 00:14:27,710 Try some of Jill's meat loaf, you'll become an expert. 230 00:14:27,734 --> 00:14:29,311 (laughs) 231 00:14:29,335 --> 00:14:31,313 No, Tim. 232 00:14:31,337 --> 00:14:33,782 Hurling is an ancient Irish sport. 233 00:14:33,806 --> 00:14:36,652 It's quite akin to field hockey. 234 00:14:36,676 --> 00:14:40,089 Speaking of "kin," I hired my brother Marty to work at Tool Time, 235 00:14:40,113 --> 00:14:42,992 and ever since he's been there he's been driving me crazy. 236 00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:44,694 Mm, mm-hm. Mm-hm, mm-hm. 237 00:14:44,718 --> 00:14:46,461 He thinks I'm bossing him around. 238 00:14:46,485 --> 00:14:48,530 I think he's just a pain in the butt. 239 00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:50,866 I might have to fire him. Hm. 240 00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:53,568 I'm reminded of the story of Romulus and Remus. 241 00:14:53,592 --> 00:14:57,006 Huh? 242 00:14:57,030 --> 00:15:00,710 Two brothers who were abandoned at birth and nursed by a she-wolf. 243 00:15:00,734 --> 00:15:04,513 Sounds like the story of Al and Cal Borland. 244 00:15:04,537 --> 00:15:10,920 Romulus and Remus were close until they decided to work together to build a city. 245 00:15:10,944 --> 00:15:15,290 Yeah? What happened? Romulus wanted things his way. 246 00:15:15,314 --> 00:15:18,160 Remus disagreed and that angered Romulus. 247 00:15:18,184 --> 00:15:21,364 So you know what he did? I'd fire him! 248 00:15:21,388 --> 00:15:24,367 No, he killed him. Oh, boy! Oh, boy. 249 00:15:24,391 --> 00:15:26,201 I guess when you're raised by a wolf, 250 00:15:26,225 --> 00:15:29,672 you lack certain social skills. 251 00:15:29,696 --> 00:15:32,608 No, Tim. The point is if Romulus hadn't been so rash 252 00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:34,209 and met his brother halfway, 253 00:15:34,233 --> 00:15:36,345 they might've been able to patch things up. 254 00:15:36,369 --> 00:15:39,148 Oh, I see. I should try to meet Marty halfway. 255 00:15:39,172 --> 00:15:41,017 There you go. (beeping) 256 00:15:41,041 --> 00:15:43,786 Hold on a minute. Oh! 257 00:15:43,810 --> 00:15:47,478 Love to sit and talk, but I've got an eight-pound sturgeon in the dishwasher. 258 00:15:51,985 --> 00:15:54,163 Marty, it's early. What are you doing here? 259 00:15:54,187 --> 00:15:56,665 There's something I want to talk to you about. 260 00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:59,935 I know what it is. You figure we should work things out. 261 00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:04,506 Or we'll turn into Romeo and Rolex. 262 00:16:04,530 --> 00:16:06,842 Huh? 263 00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:10,901 The two brothers that had the severe rash that built the halfway house? 264 00:16:14,274 --> 00:16:18,354 Look, Tim, it's obvious that we can't work together, so I'm quitting. 265 00:16:18,378 --> 00:16:20,990 You're quitting? Yeah. 266 00:16:21,014 --> 00:16:24,726 You're impossible to work for. I'm impossible to work for? 267 00:16:24,750 --> 00:16:28,764 You're a control freak. Everything's gotta be done on your schedule and your way. 268 00:16:28,788 --> 00:16:31,367 Let's figure out why that is. Let's think, you and I. 269 00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:34,870 Why would that be? Why? Um, it's coming to me... 270 00:16:34,894 --> 00:16:38,274 My show. I'm boss. Maybe that's it? Oh, right. 271 00:16:38,298 --> 00:16:40,643 Thanks, Tim. It's been a million laughs. 272 00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:43,345 Marty, you can't afford to quit. 273 00:16:43,369 --> 00:16:45,147 Oh, don't tell me what I can afford. 274 00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:47,183 You're not the only brother I can turn to. 275 00:16:47,207 --> 00:16:49,118 If I have to, I'll borrow money from John. 276 00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:51,753 He's in worse shape than you. He'll get it from Jeff. 277 00:16:51,777 --> 00:16:54,090 Where's he gonna get it? He'll get it from Rick. 278 00:16:54,114 --> 00:16:57,315 Where's Rick gonna get the money? From you. 279 00:16:59,452 --> 00:17:03,399 How about this? "Wanted: bright, energetic, self-starter 280 00:17:03,423 --> 00:17:07,636 willing to work long hours and weekends for very little pay." 281 00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:09,660 I already got that job. 282 00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:13,609 What about this one? 283 00:17:13,633 --> 00:17:16,073 I'm not gonna be a nude model. 284 00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:20,849 Hey, Harry. Hi, guys. Hey, Tim. 285 00:17:20,873 --> 00:17:24,753 Hey, Tim. Hey, Marty. What are you doing here? 286 00:17:24,777 --> 00:17:26,088 What do you think I'm doing? 287 00:17:26,112 --> 00:17:27,856 What you did when you worked for me - 288 00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:30,625 nothin'. 289 00:17:30,649 --> 00:17:33,495 I don't have to listen to you. I'm not working for you. 290 00:17:33,519 --> 00:17:35,998 No. You don't have to because I'm not talking to you. 291 00:17:36,022 --> 00:17:38,634 Well, I wasn't talking to you first. Really? 292 00:17:38,658 --> 00:17:41,804 I wasn't talking to you "infinity and beyond." 293 00:17:41,828 --> 00:17:45,006 Hey, Tim! You should be ashamed of yourself. 294 00:17:45,030 --> 00:17:47,209 You "trow" your brother out on the street? 295 00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:51,614 I didn't "trow" him anywhere. He walked out. 296 00:17:51,638 --> 00:17:53,349 Yeah. That's right. I quit. 297 00:17:53,373 --> 00:17:56,952 Because Tim's a jerk to work for. Oh, I'm a jerk? 298 00:17:56,976 --> 00:18:00,489 This is why I make it a policy never to work with family. 299 00:18:00,513 --> 00:18:04,860 Yeah. That and the fact nobody in your family would hire ya. 300 00:18:04,884 --> 00:18:08,397 If we shop in the same hardware store, we gotta mark our territories. 301 00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:11,600 My zones - automotive, plumbing, power tools 302 00:18:11,624 --> 00:18:13,502 and small nuts and bolts. 303 00:18:13,526 --> 00:18:15,537 Hey! How come you get all the good stuff? 304 00:18:15,561 --> 00:18:17,273 Because I got the tool show. 305 00:18:17,297 --> 00:18:19,541 Oh, right. I forgot. Mr. "Tool Man." 306 00:18:19,565 --> 00:18:21,332 Ooh! 307 00:18:23,236 --> 00:18:24,579 That's real funny, Marty. 308 00:18:24,603 --> 00:18:26,448 What does that leave me with? Brooms. 309 00:18:26,472 --> 00:18:30,019 Oh, and plungers, too, Martin. 310 00:18:30,043 --> 00:18:32,087 Aw, that's it. 311 00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:35,557 Oh, a toilet float. That's mature. 312 00:18:35,581 --> 00:18:38,126 Hey! Hey! Guys! Guys! Guys! 313 00:18:38,150 --> 00:18:41,897 Hey, hey, hey! I'm trying to run a business here! 314 00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:44,299 You know, people come in here and buy things? 315 00:18:44,323 --> 00:18:46,835 Or at least they used to. 316 00:18:46,859 --> 00:18:48,070 OK, OK, OK! 317 00:18:48,094 --> 00:18:51,072 If you two don't stop acting like babies, 318 00:18:51,096 --> 00:18:53,742 I'm gonna ask you both to leave. 319 00:18:53,766 --> 00:18:55,911 Leave? You're throwing us out? 320 00:18:55,935 --> 00:19:00,483 I believe that was the gist of his drift. 321 00:19:00,507 --> 00:19:03,018 No one's ever kicked me out of a hardware store before. 322 00:19:03,042 --> 00:19:05,888 Me neither. I've been kicked out of school, church... 323 00:19:05,912 --> 00:19:07,623 My own house. 324 00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:09,580 (both) Girls' locker room. 325 00:19:12,284 --> 00:19:14,830 Wow, we've been kicked out of a lot of places. 326 00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:17,299 Never a hardware store. 327 00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:21,437 I think this time we went too far. 328 00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:24,973 The reason I treat you like that is I'm the boss. I got a job to do, you know? 329 00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:30,145 Yeah, I know. I guess I was acting like kind of a butt. 330 00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:33,148 Kinda? 331 00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:35,918 All right. I appreciate that you offered me the job. 332 00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:39,955 I would just appreciate it even more if you never offered me another one. 333 00:19:39,979 --> 00:19:44,927 I'd appreciate it if I slip up and do offer you a job, you won't take it. 334 00:19:44,951 --> 00:19:48,063 OK. 335 00:19:48,087 --> 00:19:51,300 So, what are you gonna do? I don't know. I gotta find something. 336 00:19:51,324 --> 00:19:54,603 How about construction? I got a buddy over at K&B Construction. 337 00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:57,072 They always look for people. That'd be great. 338 00:19:57,096 --> 00:19:58,974 I'll give him a call. Terrific. 339 00:19:58,998 --> 00:20:01,510 Let's go to Big Mike's. Wanna beer? Yeah. 340 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,378 All right. See you, guys. 341 00:20:03,402 --> 00:20:06,281 See you, Tim. Later, Marty. (beeping) 342 00:20:06,305 --> 00:20:08,665 We gotta stop by the house real quick. 343 00:20:11,143 --> 00:20:13,063 Flounder? Mackerel. 344 00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:28,870 Welcome to the brand-new Tool Time set. We got a lot more tools. 345 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:32,507 A lot more fire extinguishers. 346 00:20:32,531 --> 00:20:34,509 And we put in some built-ins. 347 00:20:34,533 --> 00:20:36,779 With everything a man loves. 348 00:20:36,803 --> 00:20:38,603 Sports. 349 00:20:41,107 --> 00:20:44,620 The armed forces. 350 00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:46,288 We've got Tim. 351 00:20:46,312 --> 00:20:48,278 We've got Al. 352 00:20:52,718 --> 00:20:55,564 When we were remodeling, two words came to mind. 353 00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:58,667 Unpaid overtime? 354 00:20:58,691 --> 00:21:01,269 No, Al. Modular design. 355 00:21:01,293 --> 00:21:03,472 Heidi, show them the new Tool Time library. 356 00:21:03,496 --> 00:21:07,443 Complete with all the fabulous classic works of tool history. 357 00:21:07,467 --> 00:21:10,945 A Tale of Two Steam Shovels, 358 00:21:10,969 --> 00:21:13,915 Stainless Steel Magnolias, 359 00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:16,651 David Copper Pipe. 360 00:21:16,675 --> 00:21:20,189 And behind that unit... 361 00:21:20,213 --> 00:21:22,291 We've got an all-purpose paint center. 362 00:21:22,315 --> 00:21:25,327 Heidi, why don't you show them what's behind door number two? 363 00:21:25,351 --> 00:21:28,230 You got your power tools on one side. 364 00:21:28,254 --> 00:21:31,033 (Tim) Yeah! 365 00:21:31,057 --> 00:21:35,070 And more power tools on the other side. 366 00:21:35,094 --> 00:21:37,573 And here's the most exciting part of our new set. 367 00:21:37,597 --> 00:21:40,364 Our brand-new interview area. Heidi! 368 00:21:53,479 --> 00:21:56,759 We can interview guests in style. Al, be my first guest. 369 00:21:56,783 --> 00:21:58,849 All right. Thank you, Tim. 370 00:22:01,554 --> 00:22:05,500 Mr. Borland, it was tough getting you on the show due to your hectic work schedule. 371 00:22:05,524 --> 00:22:09,738 (laughs) Good one, Tim! 372 00:22:09,762 --> 00:22:12,140 We'll show a clip of Al's movie. 373 00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:14,242 What was it like making love with Flipper? 374 00:22:14,266 --> 00:22:16,545 That was a great idea, huh? 375 00:22:16,569 --> 00:22:18,580 Let's show that clip right now. 376 00:22:18,604 --> 00:22:21,083 Al! Al! Wait a minute! 377 00:22:21,107 --> 00:22:23,467 Get out! Get out! Al, get out! 378 00:22:32,251 --> 00:22:35,830 Heidi was generous enough to alternate her parking space with me. 379 00:22:35,854 --> 00:22:38,500 That's right. 380 00:22:38,524 --> 00:22:43,005 And it's never too soon to start alternating. 381 00:22:43,029 --> 00:22:45,541 (director) Stand by, on your mark... 382 00:22:45,565 --> 00:22:49,378 False start. False start. OK? 383 00:22:49,402 --> 00:22:51,112 And, Billy. 384 00:22:51,136 --> 00:22:52,936 On your mark, get set... go. 385 00:22:54,674 --> 00:22:57,307 Got a winner? We'll have to look at the replay. 385 00:22:58,305 --> 00:23:58,380 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/8d5qq Help other users to choose the best subtitles