1 00:00:01,334 --> 00:00:03,268 Does everybody know what time it is? 2 00:00:03,336 --> 00:00:05,099 Tool Time! 3 00:00:05,205 --> 00:00:09,767 That's right. Binford Tools is proud to present Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor! 4 00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:12,141 [cheering] 5 00:00:13,980 --> 00:00:15,743 Thank you. 6 00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,180 Thank you, everybody. 7 00:00:18,118 --> 00:00:21,610 Thank you, Heidi, our Tool Time mother-to-be. 8 00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:23,918 [cheering] 9 00:00:23,990 --> 00:00:26,857 Welcome to Tool Time. l am Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor. 10 00:00:26,926 --> 00:00:29,793 Of course, you all know my assistant, Al Borland. 11 00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,296 [cheering] 12 00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:36,334 Yesterday we showed you how to treat an electrical burn. 13 00:00:41,141 --> 00:00:43,302 And a thermal burn. 14 00:00:44,911 --> 00:00:49,075 Now we're showing the important part, fire safety equipment for the home. 15 00:00:49,149 --> 00:00:50,878 [siren sounding] 16 00:00:50,950 --> 00:00:54,613 The most important piece of equipment in your home is the smoke alarm. 17 00:00:54,687 --> 00:00:57,155 We suggest putting one of these in every room. 18 00:00:57,223 --> 00:01:00,454 And if you're like Tim you should wear one on you belt. 19 00:01:05,331 --> 00:01:08,630 lt's also important to have a quality chemical extinguisher. 20 00:01:08,701 --> 00:01:11,397 Right. Now, what if your extinguisher is empty 21 00:01:11,471 --> 00:01:12,961 and the fire is spreading? 22 00:01:13,039 --> 00:01:15,530 Run like hell and hope you have good insurance. 23 00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:18,135 Binford has a better idea. 24 00:01:18,211 --> 00:01:19,974 They always do, Al. 25 00:01:20,046 --> 00:01:21,809 Show us what they got. 26 00:01:21,881 --> 00:01:25,908 lntroducing the Binford 61 00 Home Fireman. 27 00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,478 lt taps right into your cold water line. 28 00:01:28,555 --> 00:01:32,389 You want to be sure the main valve is in the ''o' position when stored. 29 00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:34,791 Now, you got 40 feet of hose, 30 00:01:34,861 --> 00:01:36,351 double hose construction 31 00:01:36,429 --> 00:01:38,659 and a separate onloff switch right here. 32 00:01:38,731 --> 00:01:40,062 - [man screaming] - Oh! 33 00:01:43,970 --> 00:01:48,464 That's perfect if you want to put out a cigarette or irritated Teamster. 34 00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:54,738 - But a real man needs real protection. - What are you talking about? 35 00:01:54,814 --> 00:01:57,510 l remodeled a little more power to the home fireman. 36 00:01:57,584 --> 00:02:02,078 - Uh, fire safety is no joking matter. - l'm not joking about this, Al. 37 00:02:02,155 --> 00:02:04,783 Tim, this hose is not constructed for any more pressure. 38 00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:07,349 l don't want to get wet. The audience doesn't want to. 39 00:02:07,427 --> 00:02:11,363 Al! Ladies and gentlemen, the Tim Taylor version of The Home Fireman. 40 00:02:11,431 --> 00:02:13,524 Ladies and gentlemen, take cover! 41 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:21,074 -== [ www.OpenSubtitles.org ] ==- 42 00:03:11,491 --> 00:03:14,460 Well, they finally settled my Aunt Sharon's estate. 43 00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:16,188 Cool. What's our cut? 44 00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:20,825 Brad, don't be disrespectful. 45 00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:23,425 Brad. What's our cut? 46 00:03:26,272 --> 00:03:27,830 Oh, my God. 47 00:03:27,907 --> 00:03:30,068 lt's $56,000! 48 00:03:30,143 --> 00:03:32,907 She's giving us 56,000 smackaroonies? 49 00:03:32,979 --> 00:03:34,879 Well, no, to me and my sisters. 50 00:03:34,948 --> 00:03:37,314 Split it five ways? Ugh. 51 00:03:37,383 --> 00:03:40,147 lnheritance tax, probate costs, lawyer fees, 52 00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:42,586 tolls, tips, gratuities, who knows? 53 00:03:42,655 --> 00:03:44,816 Well, how much do you think is gonna be left? 54 00:03:44,924 --> 00:03:48,382 Put it this way. Your Aunt Sharon is not the only one to end up in the hole. 55 00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:52,889 l don't think so. 56 00:03:52,999 --> 00:03:55,763 Look at this. Not too shabby. 57 00:03:55,835 --> 00:03:59,293 Well, did Aunt Sharon mention... Well, l was her favorite nephew? 58 00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:03,337 Sorry. Apparently, Aunt Sharon stipulated 59 00:04:03,443 --> 00:04:07,174 that l spend the money on myself for something frivolous. 60 00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:10,113 She doesn't want me to live my life the way she did. 61 00:04:10,216 --> 00:04:13,549 She didn't spend a dime on anything. She made her own salt. 62 00:04:14,687 --> 00:04:17,850 l still can't believe Aunt Sharon left us out of her will. 63 00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:20,085 Yeah, l mean, we were always so nice to her. 64 00:04:20,159 --> 00:04:21,649 Which one was she? 65 00:04:23,329 --> 00:04:25,695 l believe she was the bald one. 66 00:04:25,798 --> 00:04:29,256 You're gonna have to narrow it down a little more than that. 67 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:34,565 Wow. lt's not gonna be easy to go out and spend all this money on myself. 68 00:04:34,674 --> 00:04:37,643 Spend it on me. At least it's going to a good cause. 69 00:04:39,145 --> 00:04:42,012 There's a lot of things l could do with this money. 70 00:04:42,081 --> 00:04:44,379 - l could go on a trip. - Yeah. 71 00:04:45,985 --> 00:04:47,748 We could go to lndy. 72 00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:50,885 l could buy a lot of clothes. 73 00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:52,652 You could wear them to lndy. 74 00:04:52,725 --> 00:04:54,659 Would you forget about lndy? 75 00:04:54,727 --> 00:04:56,820 Wow. 76 00:04:57,897 --> 00:05:00,388 There is one thing that l've always wanted. 77 00:05:01,567 --> 00:05:03,194 l used to have this boyfriend... 78 00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:05,737 No, no, no. You're not buying an old boyfriend. 79 00:05:07,573 --> 00:05:11,339 No! He had this really cute little sports car 80 00:05:11,444 --> 00:05:13,412 and l always wanted one just like it. 81 00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:15,242 Wait a minute. 82 00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:18,478 You're considering dropping that money on a car you don't need? 83 00:05:18,584 --> 00:05:20,848 - l love you. l love you. - No. 84 00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:23,016 l can't. lt's too crazy. 85 00:05:23,089 --> 00:05:26,388 You'll look great running around the campus in an old convertible. 86 00:05:26,459 --> 00:05:28,950 - Maybe a GTO or something. - Think so? l could do that? 87 00:05:29,028 --> 00:05:34,159 Yes. lt's a well-known fact that driving a muscle car makes you look younger. 88 00:05:36,202 --> 00:05:37,965 Well, you only go around once. 89 00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:41,199 lf you had a fast car you could go around two, three times. 90 00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:43,502 [horn honking] 91 00:05:44,110 --> 00:05:46,670 l don't understand why we have to come to a car lot. 92 00:05:46,746 --> 00:05:48,475 l found a bunch of cars in this paper. 93 00:05:48,548 --> 00:05:50,846 We'll get to these. l want you to meet my car guy. 94 00:05:50,917 --> 00:05:53,283 He only deals in real high-quality stuff. 95 00:05:53,386 --> 00:05:55,411 - Timmy. - Jerry. 96 00:05:55,488 --> 00:05:57,547 - Timmy. - Jerry. 97 00:05:58,658 --> 00:05:59,784 Jilly. 98 00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:01,918 - This is Jerry. My wife. - Nice to meet you. 99 00:06:01,994 --> 00:06:03,757 l knew you had a good-looking Mustang. 100 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:07,390 l didn't realize you had such a good-looking wife. 101 00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:09,298 We're here to look at cars, Jerry. 102 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,735 - Yeah. - l'm looking for a convertible. 103 00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:14,102 - Maybe a muscle car. - l don't want a muscle car. 104 00:06:14,173 --> 00:06:18,405 Oh, come on. Show her the Shelby. Just take a look at it, please. 105 00:06:18,478 --> 00:06:20,639 [Jerry] lt's a beauty. 106 00:06:20,747 --> 00:06:24,239 - lt's got a 351 Windsor... - A Windsor! 107 00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:26,751 ...automatic transmission. 108 00:06:26,819 --> 00:06:29,379 lt's got a new convertible top on there... 109 00:06:29,455 --> 00:06:31,719 l don't like the door handles. That one is cute. 110 00:06:31,791 --> 00:06:33,759 The door han...? Cute? 111 00:06:33,860 --> 00:06:37,159 Honey, we're buying a car, not a kitten. 112 00:06:37,964 --> 00:06:40,831 Well, if you're looking for something that purrs, 113 00:06:41,467 --> 00:06:44,129 Tim, the '69 El Camino. 114 00:06:44,203 --> 00:06:46,637 l've driven this. Great. lt's perfect for you. 115 00:06:46,706 --> 00:06:48,571 Half car, half truck. 116 00:06:48,641 --> 00:06:50,074 We could put her into this. 117 00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:52,043 You're not putting me into anything. 118 00:06:52,111 --> 00:06:55,012 - What happened to the convertible? - You're gonna love this. 119 00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:57,515 lt's got it all. lt's got a built 327... 120 00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:59,710 - Built 327! - lt's four-speed. 121 00:06:59,786 --> 00:07:01,617 - Four-speed. - Posit traction. 122 00:07:01,687 --> 00:07:06,249 Posit traction! But, Jerry, the price is a little hefty. 123 00:07:07,026 --> 00:07:08,288 What can we do about that? 124 00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:11,194 Tim, they're numbers. They mean nothing. 125 00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:13,425 Hello? Remember me? lt's my car. 126 00:07:13,533 --> 00:07:15,899 Back up. l'm making a big deal here. 127 00:07:16,803 --> 00:07:18,327 All right, bottom line. 128 00:07:19,238 --> 00:07:21,263 l could take $900 off the sticker, Tim. 129 00:07:21,340 --> 00:07:24,639 - l'm not making a dime. - True, 'cause l don't want this car. 130 00:07:26,479 --> 00:07:29,642 That's exactly how to play it. You get the best deal that way. 131 00:07:29,749 --> 00:07:32,513 All right. l'll throw in a set of new tires. 132 00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:37,244 - l don't want the car. - Free undercoating. 133 00:07:39,225 --> 00:07:41,318 You got him right where you want him. 134 00:07:41,394 --> 00:07:44,761 Have you heard one word l've said? l want to choose my own car! 135 00:07:44,864 --> 00:07:47,958 - And l do not want that car! - l think you've done enough. 136 00:07:48,034 --> 00:07:50,901 l must have been insane to think l could take you car shopping. 137 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:53,461 - Jill. - Save it, Timmy. Good-bye, Jerry. 138 00:07:53,539 --> 00:07:56,235 She's killin' me. All right, LoJack. 139 00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:58,072 - LoJack! - Yeah. 140 00:07:58,177 --> 00:08:00,304 - [car engine starts] - [tires screeching] 141 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:04,283 Hey, Mom. Did you and Dad buy a new car? 142 00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:08,876 No. l bought a car. Your father doesn't know about it yet. 143 00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:10,786 You bought a car all by yourself? 144 00:08:13,392 --> 00:08:16,486 - Without Dad? - You trying to kill him or something? 145 00:08:18,598 --> 00:08:20,657 No, l'm not trying to kill him. 146 00:08:20,733 --> 00:08:24,260 He'll suffer for a little while but he'll get over it. 147 00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:26,237 All right. Who gets custody of us? 148 00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:29,769 l think you'll want to go with me 149 00:08:29,842 --> 00:08:32,310 when you see the new sports car in the garage. 150 00:08:32,378 --> 00:08:33,743 Cool. 151 00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:39,280 - Hi. - [mocking] Hi. 152 00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:42,347 Thanks for leaving me at the car lot. 153 00:08:43,089 --> 00:08:45,751 Luckily, Jerry gave me a ride to work. 154 00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:49,386 Al was nice enough to drive me home at his typical 1 5 miles per hour. 155 00:08:51,163 --> 00:08:54,064 l'm sorry, l shouldn't have done that. l was angry. 156 00:08:54,767 --> 00:08:56,735 l was the one that got carried away. 157 00:08:57,236 --> 00:09:00,933 Your the one whose aunt died. l shouldn't have spoiled your fun. 158 00:09:03,576 --> 00:09:06,136 You were buying the car. You should pick it out. 159 00:09:06,245 --> 00:09:08,213 Well, l'm glad you feel that way. 160 00:09:08,314 --> 00:09:12,842 Just drive a lot of them, test them out and l'll stay out of the whole picture. 161 00:09:12,919 --> 00:09:14,614 Mom, you bought a great car. 162 00:09:18,090 --> 00:09:20,217 You bought a car without me? 163 00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:22,056 Yeah, and it's really cool. 164 00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:23,890 We're moving in with her. 165 00:09:27,366 --> 00:09:29,391 l can't believe you bought a car without me. 166 00:09:29,468 --> 00:09:31,197 Did you buy that stupid Alfa? 167 00:09:31,270 --> 00:09:34,535 No, but l think you're really gonna like the one that l did get. 168 00:09:38,778 --> 00:09:40,507 lt's British! 169 00:09:43,649 --> 00:09:46,311 lt's a '67 Austin-Healey. 170 00:09:46,385 --> 00:09:48,148 l know what the heck it is! 171 00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:50,222 l don't know anything about British cars. 172 00:09:50,289 --> 00:09:52,120 That was a big selling point. 173 00:09:54,860 --> 00:09:57,624 These things require constant attention, honey. 174 00:09:57,697 --> 00:10:00,257 Yeah, l know. l thought l could learn about the car, 175 00:10:00,366 --> 00:10:03,199 - and do some of the work myself. - [laughing] 176 00:10:08,140 --> 00:10:12,975 Ooh, boy. These have a positive ground wiring system that nobody understands. 177 00:10:13,045 --> 00:10:15,809 Don't get me started on side draft carburetors. 178 00:10:15,881 --> 00:10:17,405 This... lt's a shocker. 179 00:10:17,483 --> 00:10:19,178 l don't know what to say. 180 00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:25,785 How about saying that you're really happy that l got the car l wanted? 181 00:10:29,261 --> 00:10:31,229 All right. 182 00:10:31,330 --> 00:10:33,855 l... l... lt's British! 183 00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,198 These people made a fighter plane out of wood! 184 00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:41,398 - Tim. - They put kidneys in pies! 185 00:10:43,376 --> 00:10:46,106 What does any of that have to do with my car? 186 00:10:46,178 --> 00:10:47,338 Well... 187 00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:50,214 l don't understand these kind of cars. 188 00:10:50,282 --> 00:10:53,445 So you won't understand it. How do we know you didn't get a lemon? 189 00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:56,977 No. l had it checked out by a British mechanic. 190 00:10:57,056 --> 00:11:00,116 A British mechanic? What did he say, it was ducky? 191 00:11:00,192 --> 00:11:03,218 Nigel went over this car bumper to bumper. 192 00:11:03,295 --> 00:11:06,264 He said it was in great mechanical shape and l got a great deal. 193 00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:09,563 - Can l have the keys, please? - What for? 194 00:11:09,635 --> 00:11:13,332 l want to take it for a little drive and see what kind of trouble you're in. 195 00:11:13,406 --> 00:11:17,308 You put down my car. You put me down for buying my car. 196 00:11:17,376 --> 00:11:18,934 You expect me to hand over the keys 197 00:11:19,045 --> 00:11:21,172 so you can tell me what else is wrong with it? 198 00:11:21,247 --> 00:11:23,181 lt's a thought. 199 00:11:23,716 --> 00:11:25,013 Well, think about this. 200 00:11:25,084 --> 00:11:28,110 l don't want you to drive my car l don't want you to ride in my car. 201 00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:30,849 l don't want you anywhere near my car! 202 00:11:32,058 --> 00:11:35,186 So, l suppose putting it on the rack is out of the question. 203 00:11:39,398 --> 00:11:41,730 l'll fix my own dinner. 204 00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:49,598 [car horn honking] 205 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:52,337 That's my carpool. l should be back around 1 0:00. 206 00:11:52,411 --> 00:11:54,572 OK. l got everything under control here. 207 00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:58,182 [thinking] She's leaving her keys to the Healey. 208 00:12:00,486 --> 00:12:02,613 Make sure the boys do their homework. 209 00:12:02,688 --> 00:12:05,521 - And don't try to help them. - Don't worry about that. 210 00:12:07,026 --> 00:12:09,859 I could just check it out. 211 00:12:09,929 --> 00:12:12,090 But I gotta have it back before 10:00. 212 00:12:12,631 --> 00:12:14,895 - You have a good time, OK? - l will. 213 00:12:14,967 --> 00:12:17,697 Oh, boy. Oh, boy. 214 00:12:17,770 --> 00:12:20,136 Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. 215 00:12:28,881 --> 00:12:30,849 Oh, no. 216 00:12:33,018 --> 00:12:35,043 There's a new car in my garage. 217 00:12:35,121 --> 00:12:38,887 And I'm not allowed to drive it. I'm in Tim Taylor hell. 218 00:12:43,896 --> 00:12:45,989 It does have a nice looking body on this. 219 00:12:46,065 --> 00:12:47,760 Good curves. 220 00:12:47,833 --> 00:12:51,792 I've had a lot of vehicles in my time, French, German, Italiano. 221 00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,434 But never British. 222 00:12:58,144 --> 00:13:00,078 Fits me like a glove. 223 00:13:01,213 --> 00:13:04,546 Nice feel on the clutch. Short throw on the gearbox. 224 00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:06,482 I gotta drive this car. 225 00:13:06,552 --> 00:13:09,077 If I only had the keys. 226 00:13:10,923 --> 00:13:12,823 Then I wouldn't have to hotwire it. 227 00:13:15,928 --> 00:13:17,657 What am I talking about? 228 00:13:17,730 --> 00:13:20,198 What kind of guy hotwires his wife's car? 229 00:13:21,567 --> 00:13:23,262 A guy like me. 230 00:13:29,708 --> 00:13:31,073 What are you doing? 231 00:13:35,581 --> 00:13:37,515 l thought Mom said not to touch her car. 232 00:13:37,583 --> 00:13:39,312 She'll be glad l did. 233 00:13:39,385 --> 00:13:43,617 l'm just checking out the wire, making sure there's no loose connections. 234 00:13:43,689 --> 00:13:46,055 You're hotwiring Mom's car, aren't you? 235 00:13:47,693 --> 00:13:49,456 l'm bypassing the ignition. 236 00:13:49,528 --> 00:13:53,658 What kind of a twisted human being hotwires his wife's car? 237 00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:56,494 You guys are old enough to know the truth. 238 00:13:56,602 --> 00:13:59,537 Your father is a sick, sick man. 239 00:14:01,874 --> 00:14:03,842 [engine starts] 240 00:14:08,247 --> 00:14:10,010 [tires squealing] 241 00:14:10,115 --> 00:14:11,946 [Tim thinking] It handles great. 242 00:14:12,017 --> 00:14:13,575 Smooth acceleration. 243 00:14:13,652 --> 00:14:15,381 This is wonderful. 244 00:14:17,656 --> 00:14:18,987 This is fab. 245 00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:21,424 Blimey, I'm falling for a Brit. 246 00:14:22,428 --> 00:14:26,194 Just got to get this car home by 10:00 or I'm in big trouble with her mom. 247 00:14:36,308 --> 00:14:39,334 Why do they have to do road construction tonight? 248 00:14:41,914 --> 00:14:43,541 [horn honking] 249 00:14:44,683 --> 00:14:48,050 What are you honking at me for? l'm not the one repaving the road? 250 00:14:48,153 --> 00:14:49,984 [man] l love Tool Time. 251 00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:58,359 [car door closes] 252 00:14:59,565 --> 00:15:01,533 [panting] 253 00:15:06,605 --> 00:15:09,301 - Nine fifty-nine. ls she back? - Nope. 254 00:15:09,375 --> 00:15:13,038 - lt's your lucky night. - Not your best hair night, however. 255 00:15:15,347 --> 00:15:17,212 Here she comes. Act natural. 256 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,407 Dad, your hair. 257 00:15:20,853 --> 00:15:23,788 - Hey, how was school? - Long and boring. 258 00:15:23,856 --> 00:15:25,221 Why are you holding your head? 259 00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:28,555 Married to me for 1 7 years, you're asking why l'm holding my head? 260 00:15:33,866 --> 00:15:35,424 Morning. 261 00:15:36,101 --> 00:15:37,932 You're making breakfast. 262 00:15:38,003 --> 00:15:39,732 Yeah. 263 00:15:39,805 --> 00:15:44,367 Your favorite, egg white omelet with shiatsu mushrooms. 264 00:15:45,978 --> 00:15:48,105 l gotta say you're taking this car thing well. 265 00:15:48,180 --> 00:15:50,705 l thought not driving the Healey would make you crazy. 266 00:15:50,783 --> 00:15:53,650 Come on. Give me more credit than that. 267 00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:56,652 You don't want me driving it. 268 00:15:56,722 --> 00:15:59,623 l'm mature enough to respect your wishes. 269 00:15:59,692 --> 00:16:01,125 Thank you. 270 00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,896 Hey, Mark, hand me the sports section. 271 00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:07,262 - Here you go. - l don't believe it. 272 00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:09,267 Lions won? 273 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:27,980 Does anybody have the Metro section? l want to look at the weather. 274 00:16:28,087 --> 00:16:30,248 Uh, we didn't get one today. 275 00:16:32,291 --> 00:16:34,816 l'm predicting cold with patchy fog. 276 00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:39,062 We always get one. lt's between classified and sports. 277 00:16:44,803 --> 00:16:46,668 But we didn't get one today, honey. 278 00:16:48,540 --> 00:16:50,405 [Tim] Oh, wow. What... 279 00:16:54,413 --> 00:16:56,244 Why are you hiding the paper? 280 00:16:56,315 --> 00:16:59,182 - l'm not hiding the paper. - Yes, you are. 281 00:16:59,251 --> 00:17:02,084 l'm trying to protect you from all the bad news in this world. 282 00:17:02,154 --> 00:17:04,645 - Oh, my God, it's you. - A lovely picture, isn't it? 283 00:17:07,326 --> 00:17:09,351 You're in my car. 284 00:17:09,428 --> 00:17:11,396 But l had the keys. How did you...? 285 00:17:12,264 --> 00:17:14,425 You hotwired my car? 286 00:17:17,202 --> 00:17:20,433 Mom, go easy on him. He's a sick, sick man. 287 00:17:23,242 --> 00:17:24,800 Boys, out. 288 00:17:27,346 --> 00:17:28,870 Tim, in. 289 00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:33,880 You know, it... Just settle down, would you please? 290 00:17:33,952 --> 00:17:37,251 lt possibly was bad judgment on my part to borrow the car. 291 00:17:37,322 --> 00:17:39,688 You didn't borrow the car. You stole the car. 292 00:17:39,792 --> 00:17:43,888 Stealing, borrowing... Wait, that omelet is getting very cold. 293 00:17:43,962 --> 00:17:46,590 lf you were a stranger l would have you arrested. 294 00:17:46,665 --> 00:17:49,566 Careful with that. lt's a very good picture of me. 295 00:17:49,635 --> 00:17:51,967 Try pepper or salsa. lt will make it zesty. 296 00:17:52,037 --> 00:17:55,700 Tim, this whole gift from my aunt was supposed to be fun. 297 00:17:56,375 --> 00:17:58,275 But from the minute l decided to buy a car, 298 00:17:58,343 --> 00:18:01,710 you have done nothing but suck the fun out of the whole thing. 299 00:18:01,814 --> 00:18:04,180 Thank you for nothing! 300 00:18:05,884 --> 00:18:08,375 l could heat it up. lt'll be as good as new. 301 00:18:12,491 --> 00:18:15,460 One day l'm gonna figure out how to suck the leaves off the tree. 302 00:18:15,527 --> 00:18:16,824 [chuckling] 303 00:18:17,796 --> 00:18:20,822 - What are you doing over there? - l'm providing sustenance 304 00:18:20,899 --> 00:18:23,333 for my Annelida terra firma. 305 00:18:23,402 --> 00:18:24,664 Huh? 306 00:18:25,471 --> 00:18:26,938 l'm feeding my worms. 307 00:18:27,005 --> 00:18:30,168 They like newspaper, huh? Probably love the gardening section. 308 00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:33,642 Well, actually, they seem to prefer the obituaries. 309 00:18:33,745 --> 00:18:35,679 [chuckling] 310 00:18:37,249 --> 00:18:38,978 Don't quit your day job. 311 00:18:41,186 --> 00:18:44,280 l'll be writing my obituary if l can't patch things up with Jill. 312 00:18:44,356 --> 00:18:45,914 Uh-oh. What's wrong now? 313 00:18:46,024 --> 00:18:49,983 l promised her l wouldn't drive her new Austin-Healey. 314 00:18:50,062 --> 00:18:54,328 W-Whoa. l thought l saw a picture of you driving the Healey in the Metro section. 315 00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:57,597 So did she. 316 00:18:57,669 --> 00:19:00,695 l can't figure it out. l get near her car, l take over. 317 00:19:00,772 --> 00:19:03,002 Uh-huh. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 318 00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:06,977 Same thing happened when Harry bought his truck and Al bought his Gremlin. 319 00:19:07,045 --> 00:19:08,342 l love cars. 320 00:19:08,413 --> 00:19:11,143 Maybe you shouldn't love other people's cars so much. 321 00:19:11,950 --> 00:19:13,315 That's my problem. 322 00:19:13,385 --> 00:19:15,444 l'm a man who loves too much. 323 00:19:17,856 --> 00:19:19,915 My love is hurting other people. 324 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:24,361 So, l think you should apologize to all the people you've wronged automotivally. 325 00:19:24,429 --> 00:19:26,363 That could take years. 326 00:19:26,431 --> 00:19:27,955 Start with Jill. 327 00:19:28,033 --> 00:19:30,001 That could take years. 328 00:19:37,309 --> 00:19:41,075 - Hi, how was school? - Fine, but the drive was better. 329 00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:44,178 Can l talk to you for a minute? 330 00:19:44,249 --> 00:19:46,376 Tim, l'm really tired, honey. 331 00:19:46,451 --> 00:19:49,887 This is really important, please. Just for a second. Come on. 332 00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:56,026 OK. What? 333 00:19:56,094 --> 00:19:57,254 Sit down. 334 00:19:57,329 --> 00:19:59,661 l didn't mean to steamroll you and ruin your fun. 335 00:19:59,731 --> 00:20:02,291 The truth is, l have the problem. 336 00:20:03,402 --> 00:20:06,166 - l'm addicted to cars. - Well, duh. 337 00:20:09,741 --> 00:20:14,235 l want to apologize for all the times l've wronged you automotivally. 338 00:20:14,313 --> 00:20:16,076 That could take years. 339 00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:19,677 That's why we've got to start. Just listen. 340 00:20:19,751 --> 00:20:20,911 All right. 341 00:20:21,019 --> 00:20:23,283 Your birthday, 1 975. 342 00:20:24,456 --> 00:20:28,017 Remember you wanted earrings? l bought you that chrome dipstick. 343 00:20:29,027 --> 00:20:31,757 Valentine's Day, 1 976. 344 00:20:31,830 --> 00:20:35,197 You wanted earrings, l got you a case of transmission fluid. 345 00:20:36,435 --> 00:20:38,266 Our wedding, 1 979. 346 00:20:38,337 --> 00:20:40,271 l insisted on the hot rod theme. 347 00:20:40,339 --> 00:20:44,070 Remember the three-barrel Stromberg wedding cake? lt was a big hit. 348 00:20:44,142 --> 00:20:46,633 - Christmas, 1 980. - Tim. 349 00:20:47,212 --> 00:20:49,237 How do you remember all these dates? 350 00:20:49,314 --> 00:20:51,009 lt's part of my car sickness. 351 00:20:55,454 --> 00:20:57,115 l need help. 352 00:20:58,223 --> 00:21:01,249 l'm thinking of checking in to the Henry Ford Clinic. 353 00:21:09,968 --> 00:21:11,629 Here, just... 354 00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:15,832 - You bought me flowers. - Well, not exactly. 355 00:21:19,411 --> 00:21:20,742 The Club? 356 00:21:32,190 --> 00:21:33,680 Ready to go to dinner? 357 00:21:33,759 --> 00:21:35,124 Yeah. 358 00:21:35,193 --> 00:21:37,218 - Wanna go in the Healey? - Oh, yeah. 359 00:21:38,664 --> 00:21:40,529 Well, you've earned it. 360 00:21:40,599 --> 00:21:44,558 lt's been two weeks and you've stayed away from my car without one relapse. 361 00:21:44,636 --> 00:21:45,796 lt wasn't easy. 362 00:21:45,871 --> 00:21:47,771 Every time l was tempted l visualized 363 00:21:47,839 --> 00:21:50,774 Margaret Thatcher eating a kidney pie in a thong. 364 00:21:56,114 --> 00:21:58,674 lt's a big night, the first time l've ridden in this car 365 00:21:58,784 --> 00:22:00,945 without starting it with a screwdriver. 366 00:22:01,019 --> 00:22:02,782 - Shall we? - We shall. 367 00:22:02,854 --> 00:22:04,321 Yes. 368 00:22:05,691 --> 00:22:07,158 Tim. 369 00:22:07,225 --> 00:22:09,659 l was opening the door for you, hon. 370 00:22:11,096 --> 00:22:12,461 Thank you. 371 00:22:13,305 --> 00:23:13,851 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/cc2e Help other users to choose the best subtitles