1
00:00:01,402 --> 00:00:05,637
- OK. A buck says
Brad goes to the party.
- All righty.

2
00:00:05,739 --> 00:00:09,708
Another dollar says Brad's been feeling
like a loser since Angela dumped him.

3
00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:12,244
And there's no way
he's going to that party.

4
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:14,513
Well, we all know
Brad's a loser.

5
00:00:14,615 --> 00:00:16,882
But I still say he's
going to the party.

6
00:00:16,984 --> 00:00:19,451
You're betting on
Brad's social life?

7
00:00:19,553 --> 00:00:22,721
Actually, I'm
betting against it.

8
00:00:22,823 --> 00:00:26,457
Gambling on your brother's
broken heart. That's really nice, guys.

9
00:00:26,559 --> 00:00:30,796
Still time to get into the Brad party
pool? I got a buck says he's not going.

10
00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:34,900
You can't bet
against your own son.

11
00:00:35,002 --> 00:00:38,937
- Why? How are you betting?
- [Jill scoffs]

12
00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:42,441
I would've gotten in the action
earlier, but I pulled my back out.

13
00:00:42,543 --> 00:00:45,143
- How'd you do that?
- Don't ask.

14
00:00:47,147 --> 00:00:49,014
I decided I'm not
going to the party.

15
00:00:49,116 --> 00:00:51,416
- Yes!
- [both laugh]

16
00:00:51,518 --> 00:00:53,185
All right, thank you very much.

17
00:00:53,287 --> 00:00:57,189
Your lack of self-esteem
has made me a very rich man.

18
00:00:57,291 --> 00:01:00,358
- Brad, you have to go
to this party.
- You think so?

19
00:01:00,460 --> 00:01:02,527
You can't stay locked
in your room forever

20
00:01:02,630 --> 00:01:05,430
just cause you got dumped
by dingbat, motormouth Angela,

21
00:01:05,532 --> 00:01:09,100
who, by the way, I really liked
in case you get back together.

22
00:01:09,202 --> 00:01:11,102
- I'll go for a little while.
- All right.

23
00:01:11,204 --> 00:01:13,972
- All right.
- All right. I'll be back by 11:00.

24
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:17,142
- You don't have
to come back early.
- How about 11:30?

25
00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:20,846
You're staying out till past
midnight, no more arguments!

26
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:28,074
Support us and become VIP member 
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org

27
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,167
- What's that smell?
- I don't smell anything.

28
00:02:15,269 --> 00:02:20,072
Oh, man! You still haven't
learned how to load a dishwasher.

29
00:02:22,776 --> 00:02:24,876
It's a subjective thing, honey.

30
00:02:24,979 --> 00:02:27,612
Look, the Salvador
Dali Collection.

31
00:02:29,083 --> 00:02:32,017
- [sighs] Did I miss breakfast?
- And lunch.

32
00:02:32,119 --> 00:02:35,520
- When did you get in? About 12:30?
- Yes, I did.

33
00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:37,723
Did you meet somebody?

34
00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:39,090
Yes, I did.

35
00:02:39,192 --> 00:02:42,027
He met somebody.
Isn't that adorable?

36
00:02:42,129 --> 00:02:44,662
- What's her name?
- Samantha.

37
00:02:44,764 --> 00:02:46,698
Samantha.

38
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:50,034
Adorable. What is she like?

39
00:02:50,136 --> 00:02:54,173
Well, she's really cute, she loves
sports, and she drives a '68 Camaro.

40
00:02:54,275 --> 00:02:56,708
Camaro? Adorable.

41
00:02:58,445 --> 00:03:01,412
- So, when are you
gonna see her again?
- [doorbell rings]

42
00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:04,460
Soon as I open the door. She's
taking me to the Red Wings game.

43
00:03:04,484 --> 00:03:07,018
Red Wings? Adorable!

44
00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:09,501
- How you doing?
- Hi.

45
00:03:09,557 --> 00:03:11,623
Meet my mom and dad.
This is Samantha Hayes.

46
00:03:11,725 --> 00:03:13,725
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

47
00:03:13,827 --> 00:03:15,905
- I'm Jill.
- Hi, Samantha. Tim Taylor.

48
00:03:15,929 --> 00:03:18,542
- It's nice to meet you.
- Brad was telling us
about you.

49
00:03:18,566 --> 00:03:20,532
- Well, good things, I hope.
- Yeah.

50
00:03:20,634 --> 00:03:23,535
Before we let you out, there's
a few things we need to know.

51
00:03:23,637 --> 00:03:26,938
- Uh, Dad...?
- I'm doing this
for your own good.

52
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:30,942
Samantha, that
Camaro... is it a big block?

53
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:32,978
You'll have to
excuse my husband.

54
00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:35,614
He gets very
concerned about his son

55
00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:38,083
getting mixed up
with the wrong... car.

56
00:03:39,653 --> 00:03:41,063
You guys go to the same school?

57
00:03:41,087 --> 00:03:44,289
No. Samantha
goes to Wayne State.

58
00:03:44,391 --> 00:03:47,092
- College?
- Yeah. I'm majoring
in communications.

59
00:03:47,194 --> 00:03:50,395
- I want to be a sportscaster.
- She knows everything
about soccer.

60
00:03:50,497 --> 00:03:52,875
Great. So you're
one of those kids

61
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:55,144
that shot through
high school to college?

62
00:03:55,168 --> 00:03:57,502
No. I started when I
was 18. I'm a junior now.

63
00:03:57,604 --> 00:03:59,804
Yeah, we're both juniors.

64
00:04:01,675 --> 00:04:04,108
Except you're in high school.

65
00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:05,844
Oh, it's hard to believe.

66
00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:07,879
Brad is more
responsible and polite

67
00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:10,515
than the college guys
I've gone out with.

68
00:04:10,617 --> 00:04:14,719
- You raised a real gentleman.
- I didn't know
we were finished.

69
00:04:16,189 --> 00:04:18,991
- Well, we should be going.
- Bye.

70
00:04:19,093 --> 00:04:22,494
- OK. Bye, guys. Have a good time.
- Nice to meet you. Have fun.

71
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:24,463
All right.

72
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:29,934
Well, I really
wasn't ready for that.

73
00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:33,872
Wait, wait. Hold it. If she went to
college when she was 18, she's a junior,

74
00:04:33,974 --> 00:04:36,941
that would make
her... well, older.

75
00:04:38,812 --> 00:04:40,112
She's at least 20.

76
00:04:40,214 --> 00:04:42,425
- Who's 20?
- This girl
Brad's going out with.

77
00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:46,184
What would a 20-year-old
woman want with Brad?

78
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:49,420
Maybe where she lives she's
not allowed to have a dog.

79
00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:56,394
Are you OK with this?

80
00:04:56,496 --> 00:04:58,263
Yeah. She seems
like she's very nice.

81
00:04:58,365 --> 00:05:01,399
- Brad's just a boy.
- Oh, come on, Mom!

82
00:05:01,501 --> 00:05:05,103
Younger girls date older guys all the
time. No one says anything about it.

83
00:05:05,205 --> 00:05:07,605
- You have a double standard.
- He's right.

84
00:05:07,708 --> 00:05:10,842
I love you. But sometimes
you can be a bit sexist.

85
00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:18,316
Well, it's our
two-week anniversary.

86
00:05:18,418 --> 00:05:20,630
We should go somewhere
special for dinner.

87
00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:22,988
Yeah. How about...

88
00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:24,322
[both] Chinese!

89
00:05:24,424 --> 00:05:26,491
- I know this great place.
- Hong Fat's?

90
00:05:26,593 --> 00:05:30,862
- You know Hong Fat?
- I knew him when
he was Hong Thin.

91
00:05:32,065 --> 00:05:34,332
I knew you were gonna say that.

92
00:05:34,434 --> 00:05:36,534
- You did?
- Yeah.

93
00:05:36,636 --> 00:05:41,272
I just can't believe I only
met you two weeks ago.

94
00:05:41,374 --> 00:05:45,643
Yeah. It kind of feels like we've
known each other our whole lives.

95
00:05:45,745 --> 00:05:48,179
How was I lucky enough
to meet a guy like you?

96
00:05:48,282 --> 00:05:52,116
Well, I guess we were at
the right place at the right time.

97
00:05:53,720 --> 00:05:56,387
Two strangers
reaching for onion dip.

98
00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:02,060
So, when was the exact moment

99
00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:04,595
you knew I really,
really liked you?

100
00:06:04,697 --> 00:06:09,434
I guess when you met my parents
and you didn't run away screaming.

101
00:06:13,307 --> 00:06:14,672
OK, Samantha. I got it.

102
00:06:14,774 --> 00:06:18,776
You want to meet Brad for
dinner at Bangles at 9:00.

103
00:06:18,878 --> 00:06:21,112
OK. Bye now.

104
00:06:22,249 --> 00:06:24,515
Dinner at 9:00.

105
00:06:24,617 --> 00:06:28,987
Just a couple of years ago
he was going to bed at 9:00.

106
00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:32,790
A couple years from now
we'll be going to bed at 9:00.

107
00:06:34,727 --> 00:06:39,230
Brad has spent every available
moment with Samantha for the last month.

108
00:06:39,333 --> 00:06:41,800
They're going too
fast. I don't like it.

109
00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:45,503
I'm not so sure. His schoolwork
isn't suffering. His job's OK.

110
00:06:45,606 --> 00:06:50,075
He's coming in every night at curfew.
Samantha's a better parent than we are.

111
00:06:51,378 --> 00:06:54,345
- Hey, everybody!
- There's a note
for you on the counter.

112
00:06:54,447 --> 00:06:56,347
- Nice jacket.
- Oh, you like it?

113
00:06:56,449 --> 00:06:58,683
- Yeah.
- Samantha helped me
pick it out.

114
00:06:58,786 --> 00:07:00,919
She says "dress for
who you want to be."

115
00:07:01,021 --> 00:07:02,988
Who do you want to be?

116
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:06,892
I don't know. I just figure I'll put on
the clothes and see who I turn into.

117
00:07:08,962 --> 00:07:11,596
You've been learning an
awful lot from Samantha?

118
00:07:11,698 --> 00:07:15,900
It's great. You're not gonna believe,
she wants me to take her to<i> Tool Time.</i>

119
00:07:16,002 --> 00:07:17,242
Yeah?

120
00:07:17,303 --> 00:07:20,304
There's something seriously
wrong with this woman.

121
00:07:21,674 --> 00:07:24,475
Funny. I'm starting
to like her a lot.

122
00:07:24,578 --> 00:07:26,377
She's thinking
about being in TV,

123
00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:28,746
she wants to see what
it's like to tape a live show.

124
00:07:28,848 --> 00:07:33,217
Brad, do you think maybe you're
moving a little fast in this relationship?

125
00:07:33,319 --> 00:07:35,820
We're moving fast because
we really like each other.

126
00:07:35,922 --> 00:07:40,625
Brad, I think the point is she
is three years older than you.

127
00:07:40,727 --> 00:07:43,795
And, um, we're
just worried that...

128
00:07:43,897 --> 00:07:46,142
maybe you're
getting in too deep.

129
00:07:46,166 --> 00:07:48,133
You're three years
older than Mom.

130
00:07:48,234 --> 00:07:50,735
Look how deep I'm in.

131
00:07:59,379 --> 00:08:01,946
Thank you. Welcome
back to<i> Tool Time's</i> salute...

132
00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:04,515
[electric razor buzzing]

133
00:08:04,618 --> 00:08:06,484
[both] ...to shaving.

134
00:08:06,586 --> 00:08:08,119
It's been grooming week.

135
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:11,155
We've been cutting, clipping,
moussing and foaming.

136
00:08:11,257 --> 00:08:13,557
Now we tackle the
mother of all problems,

137
00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:15,526
removal of unwanted facial hair.

138
00:08:15,629 --> 00:08:19,229
That's right. Every little boy
remembers peering over the sink

139
00:08:19,265 --> 00:08:21,276
watching his father shaving.

140
00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:24,202
In your case it was
your mom, wasn't it?

141
00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:28,006
[imitating] "Al, stop staring at
me! Get me another beer, will ya?!"

142
00:08:28,108 --> 00:08:29,407
Tim?

143
00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:31,943
Shaving equipment has
come a long way over the years.

144
00:08:32,045 --> 00:08:34,813
Right. Today we have a
lot of things to choose from.

145
00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:39,417
Double-edged, swivel head, disposable,
and a wide array of electric shavers.

146
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:42,954
But for the purist, nothing
beats the cut of a straight edge.

147
00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:44,956
- Right, Al?
- That's right.

148
00:08:45,058 --> 00:08:48,426
Look out! My thumb!
Oh, my God! Just kidding.

149
00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:50,528
Today we're gonna
show how close it shaves

150
00:08:50,630 --> 00:08:53,464
by shaving Al's
beard. Right, Al?

151
00:08:53,566 --> 00:08:56,801
I don't think so, Tim.

152
00:08:56,903 --> 00:08:59,503
I've grown rather
fond of this beard.

153
00:08:59,605 --> 00:09:02,306
You call it a beard. I
call it a runway for Fritos.

154
00:09:02,408 --> 00:09:03,507
[audience laughs]

155
00:09:03,609 --> 00:09:05,710
In barber college they
practice on a balloon

156
00:09:05,812 --> 00:09:08,612
to get a handle on a straight edge
so they don't nick their customers.

157
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:10,848
I've got my own
version of the balloon.

158
00:09:13,252 --> 00:09:17,221
Why do you put my face on everything
you're about to mangle or destroy?

159
00:09:18,658 --> 00:09:21,159
Because your butt won't fit.

160
00:09:23,530 --> 00:09:25,474
Why don't we take
some audience questions

161
00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:29,734
while Tim lathers up this
ruggedly handsome balloon?

162
00:09:29,836 --> 00:09:33,204
All right, any
questions? Yes, sir?

163
00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:35,907
No matter what kind of
razor I use, I cut myself.

164
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:38,042
What do you recommend
to stop the bleeding?

165
00:09:38,144 --> 00:09:40,578
Grow a beard. [snorts]

166
00:09:41,748 --> 00:09:44,082
I recommend a styptic pencil.

167
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:45,650
Don't use toilet paper.

168
00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:49,086
Otherwise, you have squares over
your face with the red dots in them.

169
00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:52,724
Looks like your face is covered
with little Japanese flags.

170
00:09:52,826 --> 00:09:54,859
Very embarrassing
down at the VFW Hall.

171
00:09:54,961 --> 00:09:58,440
All right. Um, well, why don't
we... Heidi, some more questions?

172
00:09:58,464 --> 00:10:00,498
OK. Who else has a question?

173
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:02,233
Yes, Brad?

174
00:10:02,335 --> 00:10:06,971
Ladies and gentlemen, this handsome
young man is Tim's oldest son, Brad.

175
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:15,546
Uh, yes. I'm a twice-a-week shaver with
a pretty light beard. What should I use?

176
00:10:15,648 --> 00:10:18,416
A big brown crayon.

177
00:10:19,352 --> 00:10:21,418
Brad, introduce us
to your friend there.

178
00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:24,121
Oh, I'd love to. This
is Samantha Hayes.

179
00:10:24,224 --> 00:10:26,691
She's a communications
major at Wayne State

180
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:29,427
and she plans to
be a sportscaster.

181
00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:31,796
Is she your girlfriend, Brad?

182
00:10:31,898 --> 00:10:36,867
Well, actually, as of
today, this is my fiancée.

183
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:39,503
- [audience murmurs]
- Fiancée?

184
00:10:39,605 --> 00:10:42,907
Well, yes. We just
decided to get married.

185
00:10:53,954 --> 00:10:56,099
Why were you joking
about getting married?

186
00:10:56,123 --> 00:10:58,367
I was trying to do
a serious show.

187
00:10:58,391 --> 00:11:01,393
Dad, I'm not joking.

188
00:11:01,495 --> 00:11:03,794
Samantha and I put a
lot of thought into this.

189
00:11:03,897 --> 00:11:07,298
You can't. You've only been
seeing each other for a month.

190
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:10,445
Mr. Taylor, I know
it seems fast, but...

191
00:11:10,469 --> 00:11:12,548
Brad and I clicked
from the beginning.

192
00:11:12,572 --> 00:11:16,507
Put your clickers away.
This is ridiculous, guys.

193
00:11:16,609 --> 00:11:20,712
I knew you were gonna react like
this. You should be congratulating us.

194
00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:22,458
Waiter, get me some champagne.

195
00:11:22,482 --> 00:11:24,842
And two juice boxes
for the bride and groom!

196
00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:30,688
It doesn't matter what you say. We're
getting married. Let's get out of here.

197
00:11:30,790 --> 00:11:33,090
Brad... Hey! Hey!

198
00:11:33,192 --> 00:11:36,026
You can't get married!
You got homework!

199
00:11:38,631 --> 00:11:41,866
Mark, have you seen the salad
spinner? I can't find it anywhere.

200
00:11:41,968 --> 00:11:44,680
Yeah. I put it in the
dishwasher last night.

201
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,838
Oh, no.

202
00:11:49,242 --> 00:11:51,942
[sighs] It's genetic.

203
00:11:53,580 --> 00:11:54,923
- [door closes]
- [Tim] Hi.

204
00:11:54,947 --> 00:11:58,649
Hi. One of our sons is
now melting plasticware.

205
00:11:58,752 --> 00:12:01,753
Well, another one of our
sons might be registering for it.

206
00:12:01,855 --> 00:12:04,088
What does that mean?

207
00:12:04,190 --> 00:12:06,257
Brad and Samantha
want to get married.

208
00:12:06,359 --> 00:12:08,292
Married? That's insane!

209
00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:11,863
It's sad, really. Can
I have his room?

210
00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:14,832
Would you excuse us
for a minute, please?

211
00:12:16,803 --> 00:12:20,538
Listen to this. They announced
their engagement on<i> Tool Time.</i>

212
00:12:20,640 --> 00:12:23,641
I tried to talk to him about
it. He just ran out on me.

213
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:26,406
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
What if she's pregnant?

214
00:12:26,430 --> 00:12:26,978
[groans]

215
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:30,681
What if they're getting married
because they want to get pregnant?

216
00:12:30,783 --> 00:12:34,051
She probably just wants to
get a hold of the Taylor fortune.

217
00:12:35,789 --> 00:12:39,891
- There is no Taylor fortune.
- Not in cash. But we are tool rich.

218
00:12:39,993 --> 00:12:42,326
[Jill moans]

219
00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:44,495
- We've got to stop this.
- We gotta stop it.

220
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:46,317
- We can't panic.
- Can't panic.

221
00:12:46,365 --> 00:12:49,033
We've gotta be diplomatic
so we don't alienate Brad.

222
00:12:49,135 --> 00:12:51,736
We don't want Brad as an alien.

223
00:12:52,638 --> 00:12:55,873
- Oh, uh, hi, Brad. Hi.
- Hi, Brad.

224
00:12:55,975 --> 00:12:58,353
- I'll be up
in my room studying.
- Fair enough.

225
00:12:58,377 --> 00:13:00,789
That was good. That
was calm. That was good.

226
00:13:00,813 --> 00:13:04,782
Are you insane? What is the matter with
you? You're acting like a crazy person!

227
00:13:04,884 --> 00:13:08,124
How could you even think
about getting married at your age?

228
00:13:08,154 --> 00:13:11,622
Mom, Samantha and I love each
other and we want to build a life together.

229
00:13:11,724 --> 00:13:13,090
Better build a small one.

230
00:13:13,192 --> 00:13:16,360
Not much room up in that
bedroom of yours, is there?

231
00:13:16,462 --> 00:13:20,431
Ever since I told you about this, all
you've been doing is joking around.

232
00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:24,768
When exactly do you
plan to have this wedding?

233
00:13:24,870 --> 00:13:27,138
We might not have the
wedding. We might elope.

234
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:31,242
- [Tim moans]
- Just tell me,
is Samantha pregnant?

235
00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:33,244
No, Mom. She's not pregnant.

236
00:13:33,346 --> 00:13:35,980
Are you getting married
just so you can have sex?

237
00:13:36,082 --> 00:13:39,950
What is with you, Mom?
All you think about is sex!

238
00:13:48,861 --> 00:13:50,194
[footsteps]

239
00:13:50,296 --> 00:13:51,462
What are you doing?

240
00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:54,232
Oh, I was just
staring at the stars,

241
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:56,412
trying to figure out
what it's all about.

242
00:13:56,436 --> 00:14:01,338
- Yeah? What did you find out?
- Teenagers are nuts.

243
00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:05,209
And Orion's belt actually
has some tools in it.

244
00:14:07,613 --> 00:14:09,447
- Hi-ho, good neighbors.
- Hi, Wilson.

245
00:14:09,548 --> 00:14:12,250
Pondering a distant galaxy?

246
00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:15,653
Actually, we're wishing
that we were up there.

247
00:14:15,755 --> 00:14:19,590
- Having a little
problem with Brad.
- He's not eating his veggies.

248
00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:21,792
No... gettin' married.

249
00:14:22,929 --> 00:14:25,696
Married? At Brad's age?

250
00:14:25,798 --> 00:14:29,100
He'll have to sit at the children's
table at his own wedding.

251
00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:32,670
We know he's obviously
too young for this,

252
00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:35,339
but we can't get through to him.

253
00:14:35,441 --> 00:14:38,276
And the more we argue with
him, the farther away it drives him.

254
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:40,344
Maybe you shouldn't
argue so much.

255
00:14:40,446 --> 00:14:42,212
Great, just let
him ruin his life?

256
00:14:42,314 --> 00:14:43,681
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

257
00:14:43,783 --> 00:14:46,528
The 19th century English
novelist Elizabeth Gaskell said,

258
00:14:46,552 --> 00:14:49,631
"The wise parent nurtures
the desire for independence

259
00:14:49,655 --> 00:14:54,259
in order to become a friend and
advisor when his absolute power ceases."

260
00:14:54,361 --> 00:14:57,895
If an English novelist said that,
how come it's not in English?

261
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:02,367
He means if we expect
Brad to listen to us

262
00:15:02,469 --> 00:15:04,101
we've got to be on his side.

263
00:15:04,203 --> 00:15:07,271
- But we're not
on his side, honey.
- It's reverse psychology.

264
00:15:07,373 --> 00:15:08,639
We have to pretend we are.

265
00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:11,142
Well, that isn't the most
honest interpretation

266
00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:12,577
of Miss Gaskell's words.

267
00:15:12,679 --> 00:15:14,879
She won't complain.
She's been dead 100 years.

268
00:15:14,981 --> 00:15:18,683
Show a little respect. That's
Eddie Haskell's mom, right?

269
00:15:22,021 --> 00:15:25,222
<i>[music on video game]</i>

270
00:15:27,827 --> 00:15:30,127
- Here comes the groom.
- Shut up.

271
00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:33,609
Hey, Brad, we were
thinking about places

272
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:35,311
to have your bachelor party.

273
00:15:35,335 --> 00:15:38,269
How do you feel about
Chuck E. Cheese?

274
00:15:44,743 --> 00:15:47,811
Yeah. The groom
gets free tokens.

275
00:15:49,315 --> 00:15:52,783
I get enough crap from Mom and
Dad. I'm not taking it from you guys.

276
00:15:52,885 --> 00:15:55,420
Oh, good, Brad, you're
here. We want to talk to you.

277
00:15:55,522 --> 00:15:58,822
Oh, I am so glad
I'm not you right now.

278
00:16:00,026 --> 00:16:02,693
- There's nothing to talk about.
- Now, wait, wait.

279
00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:05,563
Look, we overreacted
about this Samantha thing.

280
00:16:05,665 --> 00:16:06,931
We want to make it up to you.

281
00:16:07,033 --> 00:16:09,834
We've been thinking, we'd
like to have her over for dinner.

282
00:16:09,936 --> 00:16:12,136
Why?

283
00:16:12,238 --> 00:16:16,007
Well, if you're this serious about
her, we should get to know her better.

284
00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:19,010
- So, you guys mean it?
- Yeah, absolutely.

285
00:16:19,112 --> 00:16:20,644
I want to make
it really special.

286
00:16:20,746 --> 00:16:23,181
- What's her favorite dish?
- Anything.

287
00:16:23,283 --> 00:16:26,817
Chicken Cordon Bleu with
endive watercress salad.

288
00:16:27,687 --> 00:16:29,620
We'll go with
your favorite dish.

289
00:16:29,722 --> 00:16:32,490
Sloppy Joes and Tater Tots?

290
00:16:35,261 --> 00:16:37,606
Mrs. Taylor, you
cooked a delicious dinner.

291
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:41,899
[Tim scoffs] If you're gonna be part
of the family, you gotta be honest.

292
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:45,936
OK. The brown
stuff is a little salty.

293
00:16:46,038 --> 00:16:49,607
Roll it around in the green
stuff. It'll slide right down.

294
00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:53,744
I'm glad you guys are
positive about our engagement.

295
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:56,847
- It's important to us.
- They had a little
trouble at first.

296
00:16:56,949 --> 00:17:00,251
But then they realized how committed
we are and they came around.

297
00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:02,820
- It's good for us, too.
- Oh, what do you mean?

298
00:17:02,922 --> 00:17:06,001
We've been real worried about
putting three boys through college.

299
00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:09,360
And now we just have to
worry about Mark and Randy.

300
00:17:10,996 --> 00:17:13,030
Why, I still want
to go to college.

301
00:17:13,132 --> 00:17:16,934
Oh, sure, honey. But, you know,
you're gonna be married and on your own.

302
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:19,603
So, you have to
pay for it yourself.

303
00:17:19,706 --> 00:17:23,440
All right, that's fine. I mean, I'll
probably get a scholarship anyway.

304
00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:26,454
If you don't, I'll get a job
when I graduate next year.

305
00:17:26,478 --> 00:17:29,213
- I'll pay your tuition.
- No, you shouldn't do that.

306
00:17:29,315 --> 00:17:31,616
If that happens, I just
won't go to college.

307
00:17:31,718 --> 00:17:35,886
Brad, I don't want our children to
have a father who never went to college.

308
00:17:37,757 --> 00:17:40,157
Children?

309
00:17:41,127 --> 00:17:43,293
Oh, yeah. Children. Mmm.

310
00:17:43,395 --> 00:17:45,596
Have you decided how
many you want to have?

311
00:17:45,698 --> 00:17:49,399
I am very excited about
the idea of grandchildren.

312
00:17:49,502 --> 00:17:52,269
- Oh, I'd like one of each.
- How about you, Brad?

313
00:17:52,371 --> 00:17:54,338
Children?

314
00:17:54,440 --> 00:17:56,307
Sure. You're gonna love them,

315
00:17:56,409 --> 00:18:00,645
coming home to their chubby little faces
after a long night of delivering pizzas.

316
00:18:03,782 --> 00:18:06,350
So, what makes you think
I'll be delivering pizzas?

317
00:18:06,452 --> 00:18:08,919
I'll still work at the
sporting goods store.

318
00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:12,856
Oh. Well, yeah. But, you're gonna
need a second job to support the kids.

319
00:18:12,958 --> 00:18:16,527
OK. I see what you're doing
here. You're trying to scare us.

320
00:18:16,629 --> 00:18:19,963
- It's not going to work.
- If your parents
are having a problem,

321
00:18:20,065 --> 00:18:22,700
- we should talk this out.
- No, I'm through talking.

322
00:18:22,801 --> 00:18:26,537
I talked to them. They said they
were supportive. It was just an act.

323
00:18:26,639 --> 00:18:28,305
Let's get out of here.

324
00:18:28,407 --> 00:18:31,041
Well, thanks for dinner.

325
00:18:31,143 --> 00:18:34,211
It was... OK.

326
00:18:38,751 --> 00:18:41,251
Well, that went well.

327
00:18:41,353 --> 00:18:44,055
Did you see Brad's face when
he heard the word "children"?

328
00:18:44,157 --> 00:18:47,124
- I think we had
a real effect on them.
- Maybe.

329
00:18:47,226 --> 00:18:50,405
Or they could be headed across
the state line to get married.

330
00:18:50,429 --> 00:18:52,462
Congratulations, Granny.

331
00:18:55,802 --> 00:18:59,036
[sighs] I'm sorry you
had to go through that.

332
00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:00,203
It's OK.

333
00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:01,839
My parents are
gonna go ballistic

334
00:19:01,941 --> 00:19:03,741
when I tell them
we're getting married.

335
00:19:03,843 --> 00:19:05,987
You haven't told them yet?

336
00:19:06,011 --> 00:19:09,547
No. I wanted to wait until they
made my next car payment.

337
00:19:12,084 --> 00:19:15,163
Yeah. Well, at least we know
we're doing the right thing, right?

338
00:19:15,187 --> 00:19:19,356
- That's right.
- Marriage
is gonna be great.

339
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:22,660
Yeah, great.

340
00:19:24,430 --> 00:19:27,364
How soon were you
planning on having children?

341
00:19:28,967 --> 00:19:31,802
Well, not right away.

342
00:19:31,904 --> 00:19:34,605
I was thinking of
waiting a few years.

343
00:19:34,707 --> 00:19:36,940
Five... ten.

344
00:19:37,042 --> 00:19:41,312
- Is that too long for you?
- No, no. I was thinking
like 15, 20.

345
00:19:42,949 --> 00:19:45,616
Brad, do you really think
you're ready to get married?

346
00:19:45,718 --> 00:19:48,151
Well, I don't know.

347
00:19:48,855 --> 00:19:51,055
I mean, how do you feel?

348
00:19:51,991 --> 00:19:54,558
I think we should
slow down a little.

349
00:19:54,660 --> 00:19:59,297
[exhales deeply] Man, I'm
glad to hear you say that.

350
00:19:59,399 --> 00:20:01,498
And as much as I like you,

351
00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:05,869
I mean, it would be kind of weird
taking my report card home to my wife.

352
00:20:11,410 --> 00:20:14,312
I need more plasticware
for these leftovers.

353
00:20:16,782 --> 00:20:18,816
[Jill] Oh, man!

354
00:20:21,954 --> 00:20:25,188
- [Jill] Brad?
- Listen, before
you guys say anything,

355
00:20:25,290 --> 00:20:27,035
there's something
I want to tell you.

356
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:30,060
You want to register
at Toys 'R' Us?

357
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:39,069
No. Samantha and I decided not to follow
through on this whole marriage thing.

358
00:20:39,172 --> 00:20:41,005
Really? How come?

359
00:20:41,107 --> 00:20:44,808
Lots of reasons. But none of this had
anything to do with what you guys said.

360
00:20:44,911 --> 00:20:48,346
- No. Of course not.
- You're old enough
to make decisions.

361
00:20:48,448 --> 00:20:50,514
That's right.

362
00:20:51,884 --> 00:20:53,684
- Goodnight.
- 'Night.

363
00:20:53,786 --> 00:20:55,519
Goodnight, honey.

364
00:20:57,056 --> 00:20:59,022
Yes!

365
00:20:59,124 --> 00:21:01,444
No wedding. This
calls for a celebration.

366
00:21:01,527 --> 00:21:03,794
This proves that we can deal

367
00:21:03,896 --> 00:21:07,565
with any crisis
that comes our way.

368
00:21:07,667 --> 00:21:10,934
Here's to two parents
that can handle anything.

369
00:21:12,771 --> 00:21:15,239
I'm going out. I'll
be back about 9:00.

370
00:21:26,719 --> 00:21:28,985
Was his hair pink?

371
00:21:30,789 --> 00:21:32,656
Fuchsia.

372
00:21:37,163 --> 00:21:41,064
What we're gonna do is, I'm gonna
use this practice balloon sent over by

373
00:21:41,167 --> 00:21:43,534
the Straub Barber College.

374
00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:44,769
Hey!

375
00:21:44,870 --> 00:21:47,171
[both] I don't go
for that sort of thing!

376
00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:55,223
I don't go for
that sort of thing.

377
00:21:55,247 --> 00:21:57,548
You scared the
[bleep] out of me.

378
00:21:57,650 --> 00:22:00,984
- I don't like to be scared.
- I don't like to be scared.

378
00:22:01,305 --> 00:23:01,422
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