1 00:00:02,203 --> 00:00:03,814 Welcome to Tool Time on location. 2 00:00:03,838 --> 00:00:07,339 And now the star of the show, Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor! 3 00:00:14,648 --> 00:00:16,614 Thank you, everybody, and welcome to Tool Time. 4 00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:18,150 I am Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor, 5 00:00:18,219 --> 00:00:21,386 and, of course, you all know my assistant, Al Borland. 6 00:00:21,455 --> 00:00:23,366 To give something back to the community, 7 00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:26,791 Binford has designed this complete workshop on wheels. 8 00:00:26,861 --> 00:00:28,426 We'll be coming into your neighborhood 9 00:00:28,495 --> 00:00:30,595 to help with your household repairs. 10 00:00:30,664 --> 00:00:34,132 That's right, we're equipped to fix your tools, your car, your plumbing. 11 00:00:34,201 --> 00:00:36,768 And on a good day, your schnauzer. 12 00:00:36,837 --> 00:00:38,414 Let's take a look at this van, shall we? 13 00:00:38,438 --> 00:00:42,207 It's a custom-made Chevy half-ton. Custom-made flares. 14 00:00:42,275 --> 00:00:45,176 It's got a duel rear axle, aluminum wheels, 15 00:00:45,245 --> 00:00:48,046 440 horse 350, but inside is the real story. 16 00:00:50,350 --> 00:00:52,028 This thing is equipped to fix anything 17 00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:55,253 from a Hoover vacuum to the Hoover Dam. 18 00:00:55,322 --> 00:00:57,000 Complete set of Allen wrenches, 19 00:00:57,024 --> 00:01:00,759 circular saw, cordless drill, table vise. 20 00:01:00,828 --> 00:01:03,762 Even one of Al's vices. 21 00:01:03,831 --> 00:01:06,375 And here we have a laptop computer with a complete set 22 00:01:06,399 --> 00:01:08,900 of home repair manuals on CD-ROM. 23 00:01:08,969 --> 00:01:11,870 We call it the brains of the operation. 24 00:01:11,939 --> 00:01:14,339 Something we've never called Tim. 25 00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:20,512 Moving on. 26 00:01:20,581 --> 00:01:22,959 We even have our own paint department on this van. 27 00:01:22,983 --> 00:01:25,984 You can create the custom color of your choice, right over here. 28 00:01:26,052 --> 00:01:28,098 And paint isn't the only thing we make to order. 29 00:01:28,122 --> 00:01:30,422 Because a working man works up a hearty appetite. 30 00:01:30,491 --> 00:01:33,592 That's why our circular saw doubles as a deli slicer. 31 00:01:35,062 --> 00:01:36,672 We'll make you a salami and oak sandwich. 32 00:01:36,696 --> 00:01:38,796 Or how about a dagwood, extra lean? 33 00:01:38,865 --> 00:01:42,234 This brazing furnace? Well, it's also a barbecue grill. 34 00:01:42,302 --> 00:01:45,837 So while we're sharpening your ax, "ax us" for a hamburger. 35 00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:49,508 You can wash it down with a Binford 6100 milkshake 36 00:01:49,576 --> 00:01:52,344 because our paint mixer doubles as a blender. 37 00:01:52,413 --> 00:01:53,811 (EXCLAIMING) 38 00:01:56,883 --> 00:01:58,716 What flavor's that? 39 00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,419 White semi-gloss. 40 00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:08,074 -== [ www.OpenSubtitles.com ] ==- 41 00:02:53,039 --> 00:02:55,318 I don't get it. We've been driving around for 20 minutes. 42 00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:56,553 Where is everybody? 43 00:02:56,577 --> 00:02:58,377 Maybe nobody has anything broken. 44 00:02:58,445 --> 00:03:01,079 Something is always broken, Al. 45 00:03:01,148 --> 00:03:04,249 Guys, we forgot something. 46 00:03:04,318 --> 00:03:06,751 (TOOL TIME THEME PLAYING ON STEREO) 47 00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:43,788 There you go, Smitty. Brand-new peephole. 48 00:03:43,857 --> 00:03:45,801 That should cut down on those unexpected visits 49 00:03:45,825 --> 00:03:47,625 from your ex-wife, huh? 50 00:03:47,694 --> 00:03:50,328 God bless you, Tool Man. You have given me hope. 51 00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:54,098 Okay, Larry. I finished working on your weed hacker. 52 00:03:54,168 --> 00:03:58,903 Did the work myself, so I gave you a little bit more power. Gratis, man. 53 00:03:58,972 --> 00:04:01,283 Added a little bit of weight, so the balance is a little different. 54 00:04:01,307 --> 00:04:03,608 So let me show you about handling this bad boy. 55 00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:05,688 Al, help me out. Hold it. 56 00:04:05,712 --> 00:04:07,423 All right, safety first, folks. 57 00:04:07,447 --> 00:04:09,247 Always use your goggles. 58 00:04:09,315 --> 00:04:11,927 But now the motor's a little heavier now. Starting is the same. 59 00:04:11,951 --> 00:04:15,854 All right. Hold on to here. Gotta give it a crank, there. Oh, yeah. 60 00:04:21,495 --> 00:04:23,027 (MOTOR REVVING) 61 00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:26,631 Little weed here. 62 00:04:28,468 --> 00:04:30,134 Little weed there. 63 00:04:31,371 --> 00:04:33,437 Just like butter! 64 00:04:34,340 --> 00:04:35,707 (INAUDIBLE) 65 00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:48,086 There you go, Larry. Start some hacking, buddy. 66 00:04:49,022 --> 00:04:50,354 Nicely done, Tim. 67 00:04:50,423 --> 00:04:51,600 Thank you, Al. 68 00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:54,592 Okay, well, that's it for Tool Time. 69 00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:03,179 Hey, Mom, what do you think of my face? 70 00:05:03,203 --> 00:05:08,006 It's the most precious, adorable little face I've ever seen. 71 00:05:08,075 --> 00:05:10,435 No, I'm actually going for a goatee. 72 00:05:12,612 --> 00:05:13,778 Where? 73 00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:19,250 Oh, no, wait! I see a little something here. 74 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:22,353 No, that's a pimple. 75 00:05:22,422 --> 00:05:24,801 Oh, come on, Mom. There's gotta be something down here. 76 00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:27,058 Why are you suddenly growing a beard, anyway? 77 00:05:27,127 --> 00:05:28,971 Well, 'cause the whole team's doing it. 78 00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:32,330 We decided not to shave until our winning streak's over. 79 00:05:32,398 --> 00:05:34,265 Well, I'm sure you'll win lots of games 80 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,644 and your beard will grow in nice and thick. 81 00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,546 Yeah. But I don't know why 82 00:05:37,570 --> 00:05:42,006 anybody would want to cover up that sweet, adorable little face. 83 00:05:44,211 --> 00:05:45,676 Come on, Mom. 84 00:05:46,947 --> 00:05:48,980 (SIGHING) Hey, Brad. Hi, honey. 85 00:05:49,049 --> 00:05:50,181 Hi, sweetie. 86 00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:52,161 Dad, you can see the goatee, right? 87 00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:55,386 Yeah, but your mom prefers if I don't bring it up. 88 00:05:55,455 --> 00:05:56,654 Would you... 89 00:05:56,723 --> 00:05:58,201 I'm gonna go wash up for dinner. 90 00:05:58,225 --> 00:05:59,635 What are we having for dinner? 91 00:05:59,659 --> 00:06:03,795 Well, the boys are having leftover something. 92 00:06:03,864 --> 00:06:07,932 And you and I are going to Al's new girlfriend's for dinner. 93 00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:09,378 We are? Yeah. 94 00:06:09,402 --> 00:06:10,679 He said that he told you all about it. 95 00:06:10,703 --> 00:06:12,549 Don't you ever listen to anything he says? 96 00:06:12,573 --> 00:06:15,118 I don't have to listen to Al. He's my assistant. 97 00:06:15,142 --> 00:06:18,054 He gets paid a handsome wage to listen to me. 98 00:06:18,078 --> 00:06:20,545 When are you gonna get used to the fact that the whole world 99 00:06:20,614 --> 00:06:21,779 does not revolve around you? 100 00:06:21,848 --> 00:06:23,025 I'm used to that fact. 101 00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:25,950 I'm working right now on "Why not?" 102 00:06:26,019 --> 00:06:29,721 Well, regardless, we're having dinner with Al and Trudy tonight. 103 00:06:29,789 --> 00:06:31,556 Gee, I can't wait! 104 00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:34,459 He said that they've known each other for about a month, 105 00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:35,860 and she's really nice. 106 00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:39,163 I know her. They met on Tool Time. Don't you remember? 107 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:41,878 She was that frumpy kook with the rat that did the wiring. 108 00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:43,312 She wasn't really the rat lady, 109 00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:46,070 but the real rat bit me on the nose? 110 00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:48,907 It's gonna be a nightmare. 111 00:06:48,975 --> 00:06:50,475 It'll be fine. 112 00:06:50,544 --> 00:06:52,956 Oh, you say that now, but wait till after dinner, Al undoes that belt. 113 00:06:52,980 --> 00:06:55,580 (GROANING) 114 00:06:55,649 --> 00:06:59,317 And those three bloodcurdling words, "Let's play Twister!" 115 00:07:03,657 --> 00:07:04,889 Do we have the right address? 116 00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:07,225 Yeah, this is it. 117 00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:10,962 She probably lives in the guesthouse around back. Let's go back there. 118 00:07:11,030 --> 00:07:13,810 I thought I heard voices out here! Hey! 119 00:07:13,834 --> 00:07:15,133 Hi! 120 00:07:15,202 --> 00:07:18,736 Al, does the owner know you're in the main house? 121 00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:22,045 Of course she does. The owner's Trudy. Come on in! 122 00:07:23,242 --> 00:07:24,454 (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING SOFTLY) 123 00:07:24,478 --> 00:07:27,579 Wow! What an incredible house! 124 00:07:27,648 --> 00:07:31,349 Yeah. This thing's gotta be worth a million bucks. 125 00:07:31,418 --> 00:07:34,252 I mean, a million-two if it's been re-piped with copper. 126 00:07:34,321 --> 00:07:36,588 This is my home away from home. 127 00:07:36,657 --> 00:07:38,000 And here's Trudy. Oh, hi. 128 00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:39,068 Trudy, good to see you again. 129 00:07:39,092 --> 00:07:40,332 Nice to see you, Tim. 130 00:07:40,393 --> 00:07:43,127 So nice to meet you, Jill. Al just raves about you. 131 00:07:43,197 --> 00:07:45,463 Oh, that's so sweet. 132 00:07:45,532 --> 00:07:48,633 Well, I brought a three-bean salad. 133 00:07:48,702 --> 00:07:50,802 Oh, you shouldn't have. 134 00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:52,637 I tried to stop her. 135 00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:59,611 Don't be silly. I'm sure it'll be a perfect complement to the pheasant. 136 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:02,680 Pheasant? That's my favorite fowl! 137 00:08:02,749 --> 00:08:04,326 Here! Let me take that. Dinner's almost ready. 138 00:08:04,350 --> 00:08:05,461 Come on. Sit down. Great. 139 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:07,986 Wow! You have an amazing house. 140 00:08:08,054 --> 00:08:11,990 Oh, thank you. It's been in the family for years. 141 00:08:12,058 --> 00:08:13,535 You've heard of the Rockefellers? 142 00:08:13,559 --> 00:08:14,993 Well, of course. 143 00:08:15,061 --> 00:08:17,596 One of them ran over my grandfather. 144 00:08:19,466 --> 00:08:20,932 That's awful! 145 00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:22,801 How many times did they hit him? 146 00:08:26,606 --> 00:08:30,775 All right, so would anyone like some wine? I have a lovely pinot. 147 00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:34,479 I'm sure you do. I'll have the wine, though. 148 00:08:34,548 --> 00:08:37,582 Oh, Al. Let's not do the pinot. 149 00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:40,262 I have a '91 Chevalier-Montrachet I've been saving 150 00:08:40,286 --> 00:08:41,586 for a special occasion. 151 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:43,121 Well, that sounds wonderful. 152 00:08:43,189 --> 00:08:45,470 Oh, then I'll run down to the wine cellar, get it. 153 00:08:45,526 --> 00:08:48,137 Oh, you know, I'd better go with you because the white Burgundies 154 00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:51,161 are hidden in the east grotto. Excuse us. 155 00:08:57,470 --> 00:09:02,807 I can't believe Al never told me that Trudy was rich. 156 00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:04,954 Well, you know, that stuff's just not important to Al. 157 00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:06,878 He doesn't date for money. 158 00:09:06,947 --> 00:09:09,080 He'd date for an onion ring. 159 00:09:10,516 --> 00:09:13,685 She's got a grotto? A wine cellar? 160 00:09:13,753 --> 00:09:15,586 When I was a kid, 161 00:09:15,655 --> 00:09:17,633 the only thing we had in the cellar was my grandmother. 162 00:09:17,657 --> 00:09:22,026 "Let me out of here! This duct tape's starting to hurt me! Come on!" 163 00:09:22,095 --> 00:09:26,998 Well, Trudy seems very nice. And Al seems so happy. 164 00:09:27,066 --> 00:09:32,069 And I feel so stupid for bringing a three-bean salad to a mansion. 165 00:09:32,138 --> 00:09:36,173 FYI, that three-bean salad wouldn't taste any better in a Turkish prison. 166 00:09:41,781 --> 00:09:44,282 Trudy, that was an incredible dinner. 167 00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:46,317 Thank you. I love to cook. 168 00:09:46,386 --> 00:09:48,453 And I love to eat. 169 00:09:48,521 --> 00:09:50,921 We're perfect for each other. 170 00:09:51,858 --> 00:09:54,870 Excuse me, Trudy. I got lost going to the bathroom. 171 00:09:54,894 --> 00:09:58,663 Is it left of the bowling alley or on the other side of it? 172 00:09:58,732 --> 00:10:00,610 Left. Right. 173 00:10:00,634 --> 00:10:03,178 It's hard to believe that you guys have only been dating a month. 174 00:10:03,202 --> 00:10:06,103 You seem so comfortable with each other. 175 00:10:06,172 --> 00:10:09,151 I know. Al and I clicked the minute we met. 176 00:10:09,175 --> 00:10:11,009 Yes, we did. 177 00:10:11,077 --> 00:10:14,879 Although, I was a little gun-shy about getting back into a serious relationship. 178 00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:17,581 My last relationship ended badly, too. 179 00:10:17,651 --> 00:10:19,617 (BALL ROLLING) 180 00:10:19,686 --> 00:10:21,685 (BOWLING PINS CLATTERING) 181 00:10:23,089 --> 00:10:24,588 TIM: Strike! 182 00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:30,828 My current relationship is about to end badly. 183 00:10:30,897 --> 00:10:36,100 Tim's great, but Al, well, he's sensitive and deep 184 00:10:36,169 --> 00:10:38,636 and he never stops giving. 185 00:10:38,705 --> 00:10:41,205 You make me want to be a better Al. 186 00:10:46,012 --> 00:10:47,690 I'm gonna go bowl one more frame. 187 00:10:47,714 --> 00:10:50,415 Tim, come here. Sit down. 188 00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:52,094 We're both so happy for you. 189 00:10:52,118 --> 00:10:53,751 Thanks. 190 00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:57,254 Al, did you know that today's our one-month anniversary? 191 00:10:57,323 --> 00:11:00,892 Did I know? You're darn tooting! 192 00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:04,228 Happy anniversary, Gertrude. 193 00:11:04,297 --> 00:11:06,417 Oh, thank you, Albert. 194 00:11:09,302 --> 00:11:11,803 I've always wanted one of these! 195 00:11:11,871 --> 00:11:13,337 A cockroach on a chain. 196 00:11:14,774 --> 00:11:17,341 No, it's a scorpion. It's my birth sign. 197 00:11:17,410 --> 00:11:18,910 It's beautiful. 198 00:11:18,978 --> 00:11:20,744 Thank you. 199 00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:22,792 Oh, and I also got a little something for you, too. 200 00:11:22,816 --> 00:11:24,215 (EXCLAIMING) 201 00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:46,036 I like to save the paper. 202 00:11:52,745 --> 00:11:54,445 (EXCLAIMING) 203 00:11:54,514 --> 00:11:58,282 Look! Oh, this is the perfect addition to my exotic car-key collection. 204 00:11:58,351 --> 00:11:59,450 Thank you. 205 00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:00,930 Let me take a look at that. 206 00:12:00,954 --> 00:12:02,386 Look at that! 207 00:12:02,455 --> 00:12:04,321 Wow! 208 00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:06,168 That's vintage. It's a Ferrari. What year was this for? 209 00:12:06,192 --> 00:12:09,727 A '66. For Al's '66 Ferrari. 210 00:12:14,433 --> 00:12:16,846 You know, the one that you like so much in the garage? 211 00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:19,103 It's yours. Happy anniversary. 212 00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:36,120 It's not just a Ferrari. It's a classic! 213 00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:38,723 The car is completely inappropriate. 214 00:12:38,792 --> 00:12:39,969 Wrong. It's perfect. 215 00:12:39,993 --> 00:12:42,593 It's dressy, yet casual. 216 00:12:42,662 --> 00:12:45,963 You don't think that it is slightly insane to give a Ferrari 217 00:12:46,032 --> 00:12:48,098 on a one-month anniversary? 218 00:12:48,168 --> 00:12:49,834 Trudy is loaded. 219 00:12:49,902 --> 00:12:54,272 Her giving him a car is like you giving me boxer shorts. 220 00:12:54,341 --> 00:12:57,241 You'd have to be shallow not to see what is going on here. 221 00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:58,910 I see what's going on here. 222 00:12:58,979 --> 00:13:01,691 Al got a Ferrari after sticking it out for one month! 223 00:13:01,715 --> 00:13:03,459 He holds on for a year, he'll get the Duesenberg 224 00:13:03,483 --> 00:13:06,017 she's got parked in the garage. 225 00:13:06,085 --> 00:13:08,085 Trudy is a really sweet woman 226 00:13:08,154 --> 00:13:10,888 who has some very serious self-esteem problems. 227 00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:14,525 She obviously feels that she has to buy Al to keep him in the relationship, 228 00:13:14,593 --> 00:13:17,862 and I think that Al is uncomfortable with this. 229 00:13:17,930 --> 00:13:21,266 And he was masking his discomfort with all that giddy laughter? 230 00:13:22,669 --> 00:13:25,670 So? It's a case of classic overcompensation. 231 00:13:25,739 --> 00:13:28,017 Oh, stop it. Why are you picking apart something wonderful 232 00:13:28,041 --> 00:13:29,281 that happened in Al's life? 233 00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:30,787 What? The relationship or the car? 234 00:13:30,811 --> 00:13:33,177 Both! There wouldn't be a car without a relationship. 235 00:13:33,246 --> 00:13:36,648 So you're saying that Trudy is the perfect woman for Al? 236 00:13:36,716 --> 00:13:38,928 You know, you know, I've always had a good feeling about her. 237 00:13:38,952 --> 00:13:41,886 You said she was a frumpy kook! 238 00:13:41,955 --> 00:13:44,922 The same thing I've called Al. They're an ideal couple. 239 00:13:46,392 --> 00:13:48,137 You don't care about Al. Yes, I care about him. 240 00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:50,261 You just care about that stupid Ferrari! 241 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:51,796 Stupid Ferrari? 242 00:13:53,466 --> 00:13:56,301 (SIGHING) 243 00:13:56,369 --> 00:14:01,272 For the sake of our marriage, I'm going to pretend that you never said that. 244 00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:02,581 Where's Al? 245 00:14:02,642 --> 00:14:04,042 You've asked me 15 times. 246 00:14:04,110 --> 00:14:06,577 Why are you so anxious to see him? 247 00:14:06,646 --> 00:14:08,245 (CAR APPROACHING) 248 00:14:15,388 --> 00:14:17,255 (EXCLAIMS) 249 00:14:17,324 --> 00:14:19,034 The car looks great, Al! 250 00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:20,758 Thanks, Tim. 251 00:14:20,827 --> 00:14:23,139 But there's one thing that would make it look a lot better. 252 00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:24,373 Me behind the wheel. Can I drive it? 253 00:14:24,397 --> 00:14:25,775 Please, please, please, please? I don't know. 254 00:14:25,799 --> 00:14:26,842 Come on, once around the parking lot. 255 00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,066 We'll see. 256 00:14:28,134 --> 00:14:30,033 I'm having trouble with this car. 257 00:14:30,102 --> 00:14:32,481 Well, it's a 12-cylinder Ferrari. It's probably a plug. 258 00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:34,383 I know a guy that'll fix it. Give me a half hour. 259 00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:36,418 Give me the keys. I'll take it over there. 260 00:14:36,442 --> 00:14:38,242 It's not a mechanical problem. 261 00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:42,179 I'm having a problem accepting such an extravagant gift! 262 00:14:42,248 --> 00:14:45,783 I mean, all I gave Trudy was that scorpion pendant. 263 00:14:45,852 --> 00:14:48,519 Well, Ferrari, bug on a chain... 264 00:14:48,587 --> 00:14:50,433 It's the thought that counts, isn't it? 265 00:14:50,457 --> 00:14:52,268 I don't know. You've worked really hard 266 00:14:52,292 --> 00:14:53,625 your whole life, right? 267 00:14:53,693 --> 00:14:54,858 Yes. 268 00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:59,463 And what do you have to show for it? Nothing! 269 00:14:59,532 --> 00:15:03,734 Now, you have a woman who appreciates the real Al Borland. 270 00:15:03,803 --> 00:15:06,670 The competent, trustworthy, nice, wonderful human being. 271 00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:09,373 It's you, Al. You deserve it. 272 00:15:09,442 --> 00:15:11,409 Enjoy this. 273 00:15:11,477 --> 00:15:12,610 I suppose you're right. 274 00:15:12,679 --> 00:15:14,156 Yes. I should just hold my head up high. 275 00:15:14,180 --> 00:15:15,324 Hold your head up real high. 276 00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:16,792 Yeah! And put the pedal to the metal! 277 00:15:16,816 --> 00:15:17,893 Pedal to the metal! 278 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,683 And enjoy the ride that is my life! 279 00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:21,563 Ride that is your life! Yeah! 280 00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:23,265 Here are the keys! Here are the keys! 281 00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:24,400 There they go! 282 00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:25,556 There they go. 283 00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:26,924 You were fantastic. 284 00:15:26,993 --> 00:15:29,405 I don't understand why you're so upset about this game. 285 00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:32,730 Mom, it was a disaster. We won eight to nothing and I scored three goals. 286 00:15:32,798 --> 00:15:35,999 To most people that would be a good thing. What am I missing here? 287 00:15:36,068 --> 00:15:37,846 No, Mom. I'm missing something. Facial hair, okay? 288 00:15:37,870 --> 00:15:42,206 The rest of the team looks like ZZ Top and I look like a four-year-old. 289 00:15:43,075 --> 00:15:44,508 Oh! 290 00:15:44,577 --> 00:15:47,222 Poor baby. I mean, you're the best player on the team, 291 00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:51,549 and everyone else is gonna get those coveted facial-hair scholarships. 292 00:15:54,119 --> 00:15:56,565 So what you're saying is I really shouldn't worry about my looks, 293 00:15:56,589 --> 00:15:58,900 and I should more or less focus on what's important in life? 294 00:15:58,924 --> 00:16:00,024 Exactly. 295 00:16:00,092 --> 00:16:02,092 (SCOFFS) You're so way off. 296 00:16:04,330 --> 00:16:05,741 Hey, the goatee's coming in! 297 00:16:05,765 --> 00:16:07,131 You're funny. 298 00:16:07,199 --> 00:16:11,001 All right! House looks good. You look great, honey. 299 00:16:11,070 --> 00:16:12,615 Al let you drive the Ferrari? 300 00:16:12,639 --> 00:16:14,038 Bada-bing! 301 00:16:15,274 --> 00:16:16,919 So how's the relationship going? 302 00:16:16,943 --> 00:16:18,943 Perfect! It's like the car and I are one. 303 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,823 No, I mean the relationship with Al and Trudy. 304 00:16:21,847 --> 00:16:24,526 Oh, Al's sitting on top of the world right now. 305 00:16:24,550 --> 00:16:27,451 Do you mean that he is 100% comfortable 306 00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:30,054 with accepting this expensive gift? 307 00:16:31,057 --> 00:16:32,890 Eighty percent, 308 00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:36,159 but I'll have him all the way there by Friday, guaranteed. 309 00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:39,463 Hey, buddy. How's it going? 310 00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:41,733 Well, hi ho, Al. 311 00:16:41,801 --> 00:16:44,080 You look like you're getting ready for the Grand Prix. 312 00:16:44,104 --> 00:16:47,505 Well, I thought I would embrace the Ferrari lifestyle. 313 00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:50,241 What do you think? 314 00:16:50,310 --> 00:16:54,278 Well, to quote my old friend, the famous race-car driver, Stirling Moss, 315 00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:56,546 "You look fine." 316 00:16:56,615 --> 00:16:58,326 I stopped by to see if you'd like to take a lap 317 00:16:58,350 --> 00:16:59,895 around the neighborhood with me. 318 00:16:59,919 --> 00:17:02,920 Well, I'd love to, but I gotta finish checking this wiring. 319 00:17:02,989 --> 00:17:04,555 Well, no rush. 320 00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:08,226 We still have to wait for Tim to come back from his test drive. 321 00:17:08,294 --> 00:17:09,960 (CAR SPEEDING) 322 00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:17,635 Assuming he comes back. I'd hate for him to run off 323 00:17:17,703 --> 00:17:19,337 with Trudy's generous gift. 324 00:17:19,406 --> 00:17:21,750 You obviously are enjoying it very much. 325 00:17:21,774 --> 00:17:26,844 Oh, I am. I am. I mean, at first I was a little uncomfortable, 326 00:17:26,913 --> 00:17:30,314 but then, Tim gave me some very deep insights. 327 00:17:34,420 --> 00:17:36,087 (TIRES SCREECHING) 328 00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:42,126 Yeah, he said not to worry about how much the car costs. 329 00:17:42,194 --> 00:17:44,673 He said even though I thought it was an inappropriate gift 330 00:17:44,697 --> 00:17:46,608 that I should just relax and enjoy it. 331 00:17:46,632 --> 00:17:48,752 Mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm. 332 00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:51,079 And you should've seen the look on Trudy's face when she gave it to me. 333 00:17:51,103 --> 00:17:53,070 Oh, she was so happy. 334 00:17:53,139 --> 00:17:54,905 So Trudy was happy 335 00:17:54,974 --> 00:17:57,908 and Tim was happy, but you don't sound so sure. 336 00:17:57,977 --> 00:18:03,114 Well, this kind of puts a little pressure on the relationship. 337 00:18:03,182 --> 00:18:06,884 I mean, suddenly, you know, the emotional stakes are much higher. 338 00:18:06,952 --> 00:18:08,986 And what if it doesn't work out? 339 00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:12,623 How can I walk away without feeling guilty? 340 00:18:12,692 --> 00:18:17,728 You can always drive away. You've got a really fast car. 341 00:18:19,699 --> 00:18:24,768 Oh, Albert, I'm sorry. Have you talked to Trudy about this? 342 00:18:24,837 --> 00:18:28,039 Oh, I can't. I don't want to hurt her feelings. 343 00:18:28,107 --> 00:18:29,974 Well, what about you? 344 00:18:30,043 --> 00:18:32,388 You know, the patriot Thomas Paine said, "It is necessary 345 00:18:32,412 --> 00:18:36,313 "to the happiness of a man that he be faithful to himself." 346 00:18:36,382 --> 00:18:38,316 I suppose you're right. 347 00:18:38,384 --> 00:18:40,051 (TIRES SCREECHING) 348 00:18:42,088 --> 00:18:44,288 (TIM EXCLAIMING) 349 00:18:44,357 --> 00:18:45,756 I have just been to heaven, 350 00:18:45,825 --> 00:18:49,385 where, by the way, they still give speeding tickets! 351 00:18:52,598 --> 00:18:54,638 Gosh, Al. I am so glad you stopped by. 352 00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:57,201 Guess what I picked up for you today? 353 00:18:57,270 --> 00:18:58,502 A plane? 354 00:19:00,206 --> 00:19:02,540 No, just driving gloves. 355 00:19:02,609 --> 00:19:04,508 Would you like a plane? 356 00:19:05,278 --> 00:19:06,343 No. 357 00:19:06,412 --> 00:19:09,012 Trudy, I wouldn't. I... 358 00:19:09,081 --> 00:19:11,915 The fact is, I really don't even want the car. 359 00:19:13,786 --> 00:19:15,631 Are you breaking up with me? 360 00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:16,820 No. 361 00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:18,533 Why would you even think that? 362 00:19:18,557 --> 00:19:20,169 Isn't that the first sign? 363 00:19:20,193 --> 00:19:23,026 The man returns the Ferrari. 364 00:19:23,095 --> 00:19:26,730 Oh, no. Trudy, I really like you. 365 00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:28,799 You do? 366 00:19:28,868 --> 00:19:30,501 Oh, yeah. 367 00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:33,170 I remember the first time I saw you, you had that wire 368 00:19:33,239 --> 00:19:36,374 in one hand, and the rat in the other hand, 369 00:19:36,442 --> 00:19:40,644 and I said to myself, "Oh, boy, Al! Don't let this one get away!" 370 00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:47,050 Wow. You really don't care about my money and my cars 371 00:19:47,119 --> 00:19:48,163 and my wine cellar? 372 00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,053 No. I care about you. 373 00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,356 (STAMMERS) 374 00:19:52,425 --> 00:19:54,236 I just... I would feel a lot more comfortable 375 00:19:54,260 --> 00:19:57,094 if material things didn't come between us. 376 00:19:58,263 --> 00:20:01,423 I'm not letting you get away so fast, either. 377 00:20:06,439 --> 00:20:09,906 "Dear Trudy, I know Al feels it's best to return the Ferrari, 378 00:20:09,975 --> 00:20:12,108 "and I respect that. 379 00:20:12,177 --> 00:20:16,012 "In the short time I was with the car, we became very close. 380 00:20:18,083 --> 00:20:20,895 "And if at any point you need someone to be its big brother, 381 00:20:20,919 --> 00:20:23,654 "please know that I'm here. 382 00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:29,593 "Sincerely, Tim Taylor, the man who controls whether Al works weekends." 383 00:20:35,034 --> 00:20:37,568 Hi, sweetie. Hi. It just may be over. 384 00:20:38,737 --> 00:20:39,803 Al and Trudy? 385 00:20:39,872 --> 00:20:43,741 No, no. Me and the car. 386 00:20:43,809 --> 00:20:48,245 Al decided it was a bit too extravagant, so he gave the Ferrari back. 387 00:20:48,314 --> 00:20:50,714 I'm sorry for your loss. 388 00:20:50,783 --> 00:20:56,587 It's not hopeless. I'm petitioning to be the car's big brother. 389 00:20:56,655 --> 00:20:59,067 I'm actually pretty happy. I think Trudy's gonna be good for Al. 390 00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:03,493 Yeah, I like her. And she gave me her pheasant recipe. 391 00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:05,930 (WHISTLES) 392 00:21:05,998 --> 00:21:10,300 Fresh pheasant, fairly fatty, fricassee it with a flick of fennel, 393 00:21:10,369 --> 00:21:12,209 fling it on the fire, fabulous. 394 00:21:17,043 --> 00:21:18,620 Hey, everybody. Great news! 395 00:21:18,644 --> 00:21:20,210 Hey. Your soccer team finally lost! 396 00:21:20,279 --> 00:21:22,079 We got killed. All right! 397 00:21:22,148 --> 00:21:24,760 I'm excited. Now I don't have to grow a beard anymore. 398 00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:27,951 Yeah, and when I come to your next home game, I'll actually be able 399 00:21:28,020 --> 00:21:29,686 to cheer you to win. 400 00:21:29,755 --> 00:21:31,766 Yeah. I'm excited 'cause now I can fit in with the team. 401 00:21:31,790 --> 00:21:34,030 We decided to wax our legs. 402 00:21:35,361 --> 00:21:36,660 Whoa, waxing! 403 00:21:38,030 --> 00:21:39,775 A pretty weird way for the Westside Warriors 404 00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,965 to wind their way to the World Cup. 405 00:21:45,671 --> 00:21:48,605 They've known each other for about a month, and she's really nice. 406 00:21:48,674 --> 00:21:51,908 I know her. They met on Tool Time. Don't you remember? 407 00:21:51,977 --> 00:21:56,013 She's that frumpy, kooky... What? 408 00:21:58,851 --> 00:22:01,463 Yeah. She met on Tool Time. She came there just to be with Al. 409 00:22:01,487 --> 00:22:03,331 She's that frumpy, kooky woman. Right? 410 00:22:03,355 --> 00:22:04,466 WOMAN: Okay, one more time. 411 00:22:04,490 --> 00:22:05,589 Okay. 412 00:22:08,394 --> 00:22:12,129 She met him on Tool Time. That frumpy kook that had the... 412 00:22:13,305 --> 00:23:13,851 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/8dswy Help other users to choose the best subtitles