1
00:00:01,969 --> 00:00:04,736
You know, if I wasn't
me, I would hate me.
2
00:00:06,273 --> 00:00:09,074
Well, I'm not you and
I can see your point.
3
00:00:11,044 --> 00:00:16,749
Oh, man! Who's stinking up
my refrigerator with this octopus?
4
00:00:16,817 --> 00:00:19,817
That's Monique. She's my
date for the hockey game.
5
00:00:21,421 --> 00:00:26,291
Explain to me again why Red
Wing fans throw octopi on the ice.
6
00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:30,061
Because sushi is way
too expensive, honey.
7
00:00:30,130 --> 00:00:32,575
All right, guys, I'll be home by
midnight. What car should I take?
8
00:00:32,599 --> 00:00:35,044
Uh, better take the Nomad. I'm gonna
use the Mustang for the hockey game.
9
00:00:35,068 --> 00:00:37,803
No, you can't take the Nomad.
I'm going to the movies with Patty.
10
00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:39,950
What about the
Healey? Is it running?
11
00:00:39,974 --> 00:00:42,107
(LAUGHING)
12
00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:43,920
Guys, what am I supposed
to use for transportation?
13
00:00:43,944 --> 00:00:45,477
Use your bike.
14
00:00:47,248 --> 00:00:49,014
Dad, I'm going on a date.
15
00:00:49,083 --> 00:00:50,460
You ride up to her house, you
ring the bell a couple of times,
16
00:00:50,484 --> 00:00:51,983
chicks dig that stuff.
17
00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:54,953
Guys, this is ridiculous.
18
00:00:55,021 --> 00:00:56,933
I mean, we have three cars and
I still don't have anything to drive.
19
00:00:56,957 --> 00:00:58,535
I mean, when am I
going to get my own car?
20
00:00:58,559 --> 00:01:00,403
We're not gonna just
give you a car, Brad.
21
00:01:00,427 --> 00:01:01,904
Well, Dad, that's why
I've been working so hard.
22
00:01:01,928 --> 00:01:03,506
I mean, I've saved over $2,000.
23
00:01:03,530 --> 00:01:05,642
And on my last report
card I got all A's and B's.
24
00:01:05,666 --> 00:01:07,132
You saved $2,000?
25
00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,601
Hold on. You got
all A's and B's?
26
00:01:11,538 --> 00:01:13,305
Yes. Really?
27
00:01:13,374 --> 00:01:16,553
I'm proud of you, man. I'm
telling you, that's good work.
28
00:01:16,577 --> 00:01:18,443
But I think this is...
29
00:01:18,512 --> 00:01:20,990
The last thing your mom wants
around here right now is another car.
30
00:01:21,014 --> 00:01:23,582
Actually, I was just thinking
that he's worked very hard
31
00:01:23,651 --> 00:01:25,983
and deserves his own car.
32
00:01:26,052 --> 00:01:27,652
Really? Really?
33
00:01:28,988 --> 00:01:30,433
Well, sure. I mean,
he's saved a lot of money
34
00:01:30,457 --> 00:01:31,767
and we could match
that, couldn't we?
35
00:01:31,791 --> 00:01:33,102
Sure we could match
that. BRAD: Yeah!
36
00:01:33,126 --> 00:01:34,671
And on top of that, I'll
spend every waking moment
37
00:01:34,695 --> 00:01:36,473
getting you the
best car possible.
38
00:01:36,497 --> 00:01:37,941
Cool. Thanks. Yeah!
39
00:01:37,965 --> 00:01:40,076
You know what I'm
thinking of doing? What?
40
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,011
I'll get an old Mercury. I'll chop
it. I'll make a custom out of it.
41
00:01:42,035 --> 00:01:43,814
Wait a minute! Wait a
minute! An old Camaro!
42
00:01:43,838 --> 00:01:45,681
Update it, put a Vette
rear end in it. I got it!
43
00:01:45,705 --> 00:01:46,950
Dad... No. Wait a
minute. Stop. Stop.
44
00:01:46,974 --> 00:01:48,218
I'll go with it... Dad.
45
00:01:48,242 --> 00:01:49,385
Maybe I'll get an
off-the-road thing. Dad!
46
00:01:49,409 --> 00:01:50,453
Hold on! Let me... Dad!
47
00:01:50,477 --> 00:01:52,344
What? This is my car.
48
00:01:52,413 --> 00:01:53,453
Yes! Yes.
49
00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,313
Your car.
50
00:01:55,382 --> 00:01:57,860
Well, I guess I'm gonna call Samantha
and see if she can drive. Thanks, guys.
51
00:01:57,884 --> 00:02:00,363
That's a great idea, matching the
funds for his car. That's wonderful.
52
00:02:00,387 --> 00:02:02,665
Well, I did it 'cause I want
him to have a really cool car,
53
00:02:02,689 --> 00:02:05,290
and money is no object
when it comes to my oldest son
54
00:02:05,359 --> 00:02:08,126
getting a really
bitching set of wheels.
55
00:02:10,030 --> 00:02:11,607
The money's coming out
of my car budget, isn't it?
56
00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:12,931
Oh, yeah.
57
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:20,074
Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org
58
00:03:02,549 --> 00:03:04,715
Welcome back to Tool
Time and our salute...
59
00:03:04,784 --> 00:03:08,031
ANNOUNCER: Come on down.
Everything must go. Se habla espanol.
60
00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:09,787
To used cars.
61
00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:12,568
For those of you
who just joined us,
62
00:03:12,592 --> 00:03:14,559
my son Brad is in the
audience right there.
63
00:03:14,628 --> 00:03:15,894
He's buying his first car.
64
00:03:15,962 --> 00:03:18,296
Hopefully, this '88
Mustang GT right here.
65
00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:19,809
But before he buys it,
we're gonna help him out
66
00:03:19,833 --> 00:03:22,645
by giving the car a complete
mechanical inspection.
67
00:03:22,669 --> 00:03:24,569
And assuming that checks out,
68
00:03:24,638 --> 00:03:27,584
then we're gonna show you, right here
on the air, how to negotiate a fair deal.
69
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,252
That's right. We've
already test-driven it
70
00:03:29,276 --> 00:03:32,255
and inspected the frame and
suspension, including the brakes.
71
00:03:32,279 --> 00:03:34,957
And I've checked the oil, the
fan belt and the master cylinder.
72
00:03:34,981 --> 00:03:37,048
Everything checks out a-okay.
73
00:03:37,117 --> 00:03:39,362
And now we're under the hood
completing a compression test.
74
00:03:39,386 --> 00:03:41,130
Compression test is
a great way to find out
75
00:03:41,154 --> 00:03:43,366
if your rings are in good shape or
if you've had a crack in the block.
76
00:03:43,390 --> 00:03:47,325
Now, my gauge should read
between 120 and 130 pounds.
77
00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:51,062
The last time your gauge read
that, you were six years old.
78
00:03:51,699 --> 00:03:53,665
(WHIRRING)
79
00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:56,201
Okay, perfect. 130 pounds.
80
00:03:56,269 --> 00:04:00,305
That's just perfect. Now, it's time to
start dealing. Right, Brad? All right.
81
00:04:00,373 --> 00:04:02,252
Let's meet the
owner of this beauty.
82
00:04:02,276 --> 00:04:05,396
Let's have a warm Tool Time
welcome for Mr. Michael McCready.
83
00:04:14,787 --> 00:04:17,655
Well, Mike, you did
something to your hair, huh?
84
00:04:17,724 --> 00:04:19,757
I'm Thelma, Michael's mother.
85
00:04:19,827 --> 00:04:21,871
I'm the actual owner of the car.
86
00:04:21,895 --> 00:04:24,229
Mikey was just helping
me out showing it to you.
87
00:04:24,297 --> 00:04:27,532
Oh, here. I brought you kids
some homemade jelly donuts.
88
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:28,644
Well, thank you.
89
00:04:28,668 --> 00:04:30,613
This is the oldest
trick in the book.
90
00:04:30,637 --> 00:04:34,005
Send an old lady to soften
up the buyer with fresh donuts.
91
00:04:34,074 --> 00:04:36,875
I'm on to you, Granny.
92
00:04:36,943 --> 00:04:40,712
I'm sorry, Mrs. McCready. I
apologize for Tim's behavior.
93
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:43,481
That's okay. I've
seen Tool Time.
94
00:04:43,550 --> 00:04:46,484
I know that sometimes
he can be a real schmo.
95
00:04:47,487 --> 00:04:49,020
Have a donut, Al.
96
00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:51,449
Oh, no. I couldn't.
Not while I'm working.
97
00:04:51,491 --> 00:04:53,403
Oh, I made them with my
special boysenberry filling.
98
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:55,560
(SIGHS) Really?
99
00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,462
Well, maybe just one.
100
00:04:57,531 --> 00:04:59,131
Lesson number one.
101
00:04:59,199 --> 00:05:01,044
You want to make sure that the
seller is honest and trustworthy.
102
00:05:01,068 --> 00:05:03,279
Which begs the question, why
would a woman who voted for,
103
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,504
I'm guessing, Calvin Coolidge
104
00:05:06,606 --> 00:05:09,307
be selling a V-8 Mustang?
105
00:05:09,376 --> 00:05:11,676
Well, actually, it was
my late husband's car.
106
00:05:11,745 --> 00:05:15,247
Oh, the old late-husband
routine, you know.
107
00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:18,283
What we're going to hear now is
you only drive it to church on Sunday?
108
00:05:18,352 --> 00:05:20,752
Oh, no. We took the Trans Am.
109
00:05:23,357 --> 00:05:26,425
And now it's time for the
all-important negotiation.
110
00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:29,161
That's right. Now, all used
cars have a blue book value.
111
00:05:29,229 --> 00:05:30,873
Low book is what a
dealer might pay for it.
112
00:05:30,897 --> 00:05:32,764
High book is
what he'd sell it for.
113
00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:35,967
Thelma's asking price came
right in the middle, $4,000.
114
00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:38,736
All right. I'll give
you $2,500 for it.
115
00:05:38,805 --> 00:05:42,440
$2,500? After all the
work we put in this car?
116
00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:45,355
You take another look under
the hood. It's as clean as a whistle.
117
00:05:45,379 --> 00:05:48,213
Well, Tim, it does
look pretty clean to me.
118
00:05:48,282 --> 00:05:49,282
(SIZZLING)
119
00:05:53,987 --> 00:05:56,900
Well, it was until you
slobbered jelly all over it.
120
00:05:56,924 --> 00:05:59,057
Geez, I'm sorry!
121
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:03,494
Oh, now it's all dirty. You'll have to
knock off a little. How about $2,450?
122
00:06:03,563 --> 00:06:04,829
Do we have a deal?
123
00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:06,297
No, we do not.
124
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:09,112
And I'm insulted by your offer
and your disrespectful attitude.
125
00:06:09,136 --> 00:06:10,980
I'm not gonna sell you this car.
126
00:06:11,004 --> 00:06:14,072
All right, $2,750 and
I'll give you a ride home.
127
00:06:14,841 --> 00:06:16,274
No deal, Tool Man.
128
00:06:16,343 --> 00:06:18,321
I'm taking my
wheels and leaving.
129
00:06:18,345 --> 00:06:21,712
All right. All right. All right.
$3,000. And that's my final offer.
130
00:06:21,781 --> 00:06:25,021
And here's my
final offer. Bite me!
131
00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:29,086
Dad, you're blowing the deal.
132
00:06:29,156 --> 00:06:33,358
All right. I'm willing to go
to $3,500. $3,500, that's fair.
133
00:06:33,426 --> 00:06:36,338
Forget it! Put the spark plug
back in and give me my key.
134
00:06:36,362 --> 00:06:39,263
Please, Mrs. McCready.
I really want that car.
135
00:06:39,333 --> 00:06:42,166
Oh, you seem like a nice boy.
136
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,636
You must take after your mom.
137
00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:49,808
All right. I'll let you
have it for $2,500.
138
00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:52,811
All right! See? $2,500 it is.
139
00:06:52,879 --> 00:06:54,245
Plus the cost of the donuts.
140
00:06:54,314 --> 00:06:55,647
Okay. What could they cost?
141
00:06:55,715 --> 00:06:57,081
$2,000.
142
00:06:59,986 --> 00:07:01,719
Hey, Dad. Hey, Brad.
143
00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:04,456
I got all the pictures
of me and the Mustang.
144
00:07:04,524 --> 00:07:05,635
Let me take a look at them.
145
00:07:05,659 --> 00:07:06,925
All right.
146
00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:09,872
Oh, here we are
at the gas station.
147
00:07:09,896 --> 00:07:12,063
Yeah.
148
00:07:12,132 --> 00:07:14,566
Here I am giving it
its first oil change.
149
00:07:14,635 --> 00:07:16,301
Nice.
150
00:07:16,370 --> 00:07:19,637
Oh, here I am putting
on five coats of wax.
151
00:07:19,706 --> 00:07:21,351
Carnauba? Oh, yeah.
152
00:07:21,375 --> 00:07:22,473
(GRUNTS)
153
00:07:22,542 --> 00:07:24,942
Oh, here we are
just being silly.
154
00:07:27,014 --> 00:07:28,479
Hey, that's the one with me.
155
00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:29,747
Yeah.
156
00:07:29,816 --> 00:07:30,927
Too bad you didn't
get a reprint for me.
157
00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:33,251
Oh, Dad, I am way
ahead of you, man.
158
00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:34,953
All right!
159
00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:39,857
How's the stew coming?
160
00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:42,126
I don't know. I've
never done this before.
161
00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:46,164
Oh, well, honey, it's your first time,
you know? And that's always kind of...
162
00:07:49,169 --> 00:07:52,203
This is incredible.
What did you do?
163
00:07:52,272 --> 00:07:54,238
Well, you know, I
followed the recipe
164
00:07:54,308 --> 00:07:56,441
and made sure
you didn't touch it.
165
00:07:57,543 --> 00:07:59,744
Good going.
166
00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:02,046
Hey, Tim! Dinner's ready!
167
00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:03,559
Nah. I'm not really that hungry.
168
00:08:03,583 --> 00:08:05,250
I didn't cook it.
169
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:06,818
I am famished.
170
00:08:08,855 --> 00:08:10,288
Where's Bradley?
171
00:08:10,356 --> 00:08:12,001
Same place he's been
for the last three weeks,
172
00:08:12,025 --> 00:08:13,502
attached at the
hip to the Mustang.
173
00:08:13,526 --> 00:08:15,366
(GRUNTING) Yeah, that's my boy.
174
00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:18,062
Well, my car got stolen.
175
00:08:18,131 --> 00:08:19,464
What?
176
00:08:19,533 --> 00:08:21,076
Yeah, right in front
of the high school.
177
00:08:21,100 --> 00:08:23,779
You know, I always had a
bad feeling about that place.
178
00:08:23,803 --> 00:08:25,570
I can't believe it.
179
00:08:25,638 --> 00:08:26,737
Did you call the police?
180
00:08:26,806 --> 00:08:28,150
Yeah, I called the police.
181
00:08:28,174 --> 00:08:31,075
Then I had to ride home
on that stupid yellow bus.
182
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:33,811
Well, what did they say?
183
00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:37,000
"Hey, what's the cool
guy doing on the bus?"
184
00:08:39,952 --> 00:08:41,286
The police.
185
00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:46,057
Oh, they said they hope I
have a good insurance policy.
186
00:08:46,125 --> 00:08:47,803
Well, I know the guys
down at the precinct.
187
00:08:47,827 --> 00:08:49,305
I'll give them a call and make
sure they're doing it the right way.
188
00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:51,007
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.
189
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,675
Yeah, I know. I loved that
car more than anything.
190
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:54,099
Well, maybe they'll find it.
191
00:08:54,167 --> 00:08:55,612
Or if they don't, you
know, we got insurance.
192
00:08:55,636 --> 00:08:57,046
We can get you another car.
193
00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:59,604
I know, Mom. But I don't want
another one. I want my car.
194
00:08:59,673 --> 00:09:02,251
Well, look, your dad's gonna
do everything he can do.
195
00:09:02,275 --> 00:09:04,509
Hello, Officer. Yeah.
This is Tim Taylor.
196
00:09:04,578 --> 00:09:07,223
Well, apparently, my son's car
just got stolen at the high school.
197
00:09:07,247 --> 00:09:09,158
And I'm giving away
free Tool Time tickets
198
00:09:09,182 --> 00:09:11,882
to the first group
of guys that find it.
199
00:09:13,420 --> 00:09:14,660
(LAUGHS SARCASTICALLY)
200
00:09:17,324 --> 00:09:20,325
Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me!
201
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:23,794
You know, I fail to see the
humor in what I just said.
202
00:09:25,865 --> 00:09:28,377
Brad, come on. You got
to try some of Mark's stew.
203
00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:30,702
We usually don't eat this well.
204
00:09:32,672 --> 00:09:34,783
I know, Dad. I just can't believe
my car is gone, you know?
205
00:09:34,807 --> 00:09:36,652
I keep thinking I'm gonna
step out that front door
206
00:09:36,676 --> 00:09:38,153
and she's gonna be
there waiting for me.
207
00:09:38,177 --> 00:09:40,177
It'll get back to you.
208
00:09:40,247 --> 00:09:41,757
Some kids probably just took it
for a joy ride. Come on, sit down.
209
00:09:41,781 --> 00:09:43,659
I know. But, Dad, we put
so much work into that car.
210
00:09:43,683 --> 00:09:45,595
I mean, what? Didn't
we test-drive, like, 15 cars
211
00:09:45,619 --> 00:09:47,652
before we decided which
one was best for me?
212
00:09:47,721 --> 00:09:52,156
Well, 16 if you count the Ferrari
we drove just for the fun of it.
213
00:09:52,225 --> 00:09:54,359
So, Dad, have you ever
had a car stolen before?
214
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:57,562
No. But I've experienced
every car disaster known to man.
215
00:09:57,631 --> 00:10:01,271
Floods, fires, jockstrap
caught in the fan belt.
216
00:10:03,670 --> 00:10:06,404
It was a fraternity
thing, you know?
217
00:10:06,473 --> 00:10:08,406
(PHONE RINGING)
218
00:10:10,209 --> 00:10:12,843
Yo. Yeah, it's Tim Taylor.
219
00:10:12,912 --> 00:10:14,390
They found it. Yeah,
leave it where it is.
220
00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:15,458
We'll come down and pick it up.
221
00:10:15,482 --> 00:10:17,560
Don't take it to
impound, all right?
222
00:10:17,584 --> 00:10:21,753
456 Franklin between
Adams and Walton. I got it.
223
00:10:21,821 --> 00:10:23,061
Okay, we'll be right there.
224
00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:26,491
It's completely stripped.
225
00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:30,227
Oh, man! I can't
believe my car is gone.
226
00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:33,164
Officer, what's your
plan of attack now?
227
00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:36,301
Well, I'll call the tow truck,
they'll haul it to impound,
228
00:10:36,369 --> 00:10:38,970
then I'll take a break.
229
00:10:39,038 --> 00:10:43,174
Well, that ought to put the
fear of God in those thugs.
230
00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:45,243
You're saying there's
nothing we can do?
231
00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:48,480
I'm sorry, Mrs. Taylor. But you
have to catch these guys red-handed.
232
00:10:48,548 --> 00:10:51,282
You see, the vehicle parts
don't necessarily correspond
233
00:10:51,351 --> 00:10:53,017
with any individual cars.
234
00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:54,452
So, even if they find yours,
235
00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:57,300
you can't prove they were
stolen from your vehicle.
236
00:10:57,324 --> 00:10:58,889
Thanks, anyway.
237
00:10:58,958 --> 00:11:01,704
I'll fill out the report, and we'll
get back to you if we find anything.
238
00:11:01,728 --> 00:11:03,094
Sorry, kid.
239
00:11:04,897 --> 00:11:06,897
So, my car's gone forever.
240
00:11:06,966 --> 00:11:09,367
Oh, honey. Look, let's just
go home and get some sleep,
241
00:11:09,436 --> 00:11:12,403
and tomorrow we can go
out and look for another car.
242
00:11:12,472 --> 00:11:15,784
You know, I can't believe this. I mean,
there's nothing they can do about this?
243
00:11:15,808 --> 00:11:18,354
I'm with Brad. Somebody's got
to be held accountable for this.
244
00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:20,423
You heard the officer.
There's nothing they can do.
245
00:11:20,447 --> 00:11:22,191
Well, maybe there's
nothing they can do.
246
00:11:22,215 --> 00:11:23,982
There's something I can do.
247
00:11:24,050 --> 00:11:26,462
I'm the guy that delivered a baby after
being crowned "Car Guy of the Year."
248
00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:28,931
The same night! I'm the
guy that built a lawnmower
249
00:11:28,955 --> 00:11:30,699
that can do 12 seconds
in the quarter mile.
250
00:11:30,723 --> 00:11:33,803
I'm the guy that put a barbecue
grill into geosynchronous orbit.
251
00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:36,105
So, don't you tell me
there's nothing we can do.
252
00:11:36,129 --> 00:11:38,696
I'm The Tool Man!
I can fix anything!
253
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:48,144
Okay. Fine. Then zip
up your fly and let's go.
254
00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:58,461
TIM: No, listen, Officer, I got this tip
from a friend of mine named Eddie.
255
00:11:58,485 --> 00:12:00,518
He owns Eddie's Body Shop.
256
00:12:00,586 --> 00:12:03,586
He says it's a place called A-1
Salvage that's selling stolen parts.
257
00:12:03,623 --> 00:12:06,302
So, I figured you guys got to
go down there and check it out.
258
00:12:06,326 --> 00:12:10,428
What do you mean, you need
a warrant? This is America.
259
00:12:10,497 --> 00:12:13,131
Okay. All right. Thank you.
260
00:12:14,467 --> 00:12:16,134
What was all that about?
261
00:12:16,202 --> 00:12:19,115
I got a lead on an auto shop that
might be selling stolen Ford parts.
262
00:12:19,139 --> 00:12:20,449
The police won't go
down to check it out,
263
00:12:20,473 --> 00:12:22,640
so I thought maybe I should.
264
00:12:22,709 --> 00:12:24,642
Are you insane?
265
00:12:24,711 --> 00:12:26,822
Those guys could be
dangerous criminals.
266
00:12:26,846 --> 00:12:30,181
Hello. Souffle in the oven.
267
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:32,327
Well, this might have something
to do with Brad's stolen car.
268
00:12:32,351 --> 00:12:34,163
You're not gonna accomplish
anything by running around,
269
00:12:34,187 --> 00:12:35,865
acting like a vigilante lunatic.
270
00:12:35,889 --> 00:12:37,521
People, please.
271
00:12:39,159 --> 00:12:40,825
You're right, though.
272
00:12:40,894 --> 00:12:43,172
Just like the cop said, even if I
could go down and find the parts,
273
00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:44,907
there's no way I could prove
they came from Brad's car.
274
00:12:44,931 --> 00:12:47,076
Okay. Now you're
making some sense.
275
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:50,101
What I need to do is take a couple
months off of work, grow a beard,
276
00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:53,237
get a job on the inside
and become one of them.
277
00:12:54,741 --> 00:12:57,541
Hey, Wilson. What are you doing?
278
00:12:57,610 --> 00:13:00,945
Well, I'm getting ready to
give my honey to a friend.
279
00:13:03,049 --> 00:13:06,384
She sounds like a very
understanding woman.
280
00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:07,986
No, no, no, no, no, Tim.
281
00:13:08,054 --> 00:13:10,989
See, I'm bottling honey to
take to a Crespian festival.
282
00:13:11,057 --> 00:13:13,302
Did you realize that in Crespia
they pay homage to honey
283
00:13:13,326 --> 00:13:15,104
because to them
it's symbolic of gold?
284
00:13:15,128 --> 00:13:16,939
How do they celebrate
that in Detroit?
285
00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:19,296
Well, we have a little honey,
286
00:13:19,365 --> 00:13:21,443
and then we get all liquored
up and put on funny hats.
287
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:23,134
Do you want to come?
288
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:26,370
I'm not in that funny of a mood.
289
00:13:26,439 --> 00:13:28,939
So, I take it you're still
upset about Brad's car.
290
00:13:29,009 --> 00:13:32,477
You're darn right I am. And I even
got a tip of who might have stolen it.
291
00:13:32,545 --> 00:13:34,245
But the police aren't interested
292
00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:35,045
because they don't have
any evidence, you know?
293
00:13:35,114 --> 00:13:36,147
I feel so helpless.
294
00:13:36,215 --> 00:13:38,227
Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
295
00:13:38,251 --> 00:13:40,596
You know, I was robbed
once when I was 12.
296
00:13:40,620 --> 00:13:42,665
I was riding my
brother's unicycle.
297
00:13:42,689 --> 00:13:45,056
Did they steal
one of your tires?
298
00:13:47,026 --> 00:13:50,194
No, no. This big bully came,
pushed me off and took it.
299
00:13:50,262 --> 00:13:52,141
What did you do?
I didn't do anything.
300
00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:54,405
It was that hooligan
Terry Zavacas.
301
00:13:54,433 --> 00:13:56,567
Sold it. I didn't
have any evidence.
302
00:13:56,635 --> 00:13:57,768
So you never caught him?
303
00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:58,957
Her.
304
00:14:01,073 --> 00:14:03,586
It was one of the most
humiliating experiences of my life.
305
00:14:03,610 --> 00:14:05,121
I mean, just talking
about it right now is
306
00:14:05,145 --> 00:14:07,478
just bringing up all
these ugly memories.
307
00:14:07,546 --> 00:14:09,881
God, I hated Terry
Zavacas and...
308
00:14:09,949 --> 00:14:11,127
Wilson! Wilson!
That sleazy band of...
309
00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:13,651
Hey, calm down, buddy.
310
00:14:13,719 --> 00:14:17,822
Just think about all the fun
you'll have at that lesbian festival.
311
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:20,792
It's a Crespian festival.
312
00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:22,772
And you're right. I do
have to collect myself.
313
00:14:22,796 --> 00:14:26,997
I must call my good friend Guillermo
and remind him to bring the donuts.
314
00:14:27,066 --> 00:14:28,433
Donuts! Donuts!
315
00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:29,878
That's the answer
to my question.
316
00:14:29,902 --> 00:14:31,681
What? Yeah. Mrs. McCready,
317
00:14:31,705 --> 00:14:35,039
the boysenberry filling, the
manifold, Al slobbering all over it.
318
00:14:35,108 --> 00:14:37,308
It's totally clear right
now. Thanks, Wilson!
319
00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:41,145
I think somebody's been doing
a little celebrating on their own.
320
00:14:44,851 --> 00:14:45,928
What are you doing?
321
00:14:45,952 --> 00:14:46,984
Nothing.
322
00:14:49,822 --> 00:14:52,189
Tim, you look like Juan Valdez.
323
00:14:53,727 --> 00:14:54,767
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
324
00:14:57,029 --> 00:14:59,497
Al and I are going down to
this chop shop, A-1 Salvage,
325
00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:02,767
to look for stolen parts and I
don't want anyone to recognize me.
326
00:15:02,836 --> 00:15:04,547
I assume this has something
to do with Brad's car.
327
00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:05,703
Yes.
328
00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:07,516
We're looking for
evidence to give the cops.
329
00:15:07,540 --> 00:15:09,351
Tim, it sounds a
little dangerous.
330
00:15:09,375 --> 00:15:10,919
Are you sure you
should be doing this?
331
00:15:10,943 --> 00:15:13,010
We just got to be careful,
clever and discreet.
332
00:15:13,079 --> 00:15:16,014
Wait till you see this.
Al. Look at the spy cam.
333
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,082
HEIDI: Oh.
334
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:22,619
You don't think anyone
might notice that?
335
00:15:25,158 --> 00:15:28,025
AL: I don't think these
costumes are gonna work.
336
00:15:33,065 --> 00:15:35,010
TIM: I disagree. I
think they look great.
337
00:15:35,034 --> 00:15:37,167
Uh, I don't know.
338
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:43,441
It's just I have a very
bad feeling about this.
339
00:15:43,509 --> 00:15:45,643
Why did I ever agree
to come down here?
340
00:15:45,712 --> 00:15:47,489
Because you're the
one that ate the donut.
341
00:15:47,513 --> 00:15:49,491
You're the only one that can
identify the boysenberry jelly
342
00:15:49,515 --> 00:15:50,559
that fell on the manifold.
343
00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:52,116
I am not a crime stopper.
344
00:15:52,184 --> 00:15:53,684
What if they frisk me?
345
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:58,055
These guys are
criminals, not masochists.
346
00:15:58,725 --> 00:16:00,724
Turn the camera on.
347
00:16:02,162 --> 00:16:05,630
All right. Friday.
348
00:16:05,698 --> 00:16:09,634
5:15. Tim Taylor and Al Borland
go in looking for stolen parts.
349
00:16:11,104 --> 00:16:13,737
Mother, if something
happens to me,
350
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:16,341
you can have all my
John Tesh albums.
351
00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:19,818
What can I do for you?
352
00:16:19,879 --> 00:16:21,779
We're looking for
some car parts.
353
00:16:21,848 --> 00:16:24,968
That's right. A part. That's all we're
looking for, just a part. Just a part.
354
00:16:26,019 --> 00:16:27,618
What are you looking for?
355
00:16:27,687 --> 00:16:30,388
Maybe a manifold off
an '88 Ford Mustang.
356
00:16:30,457 --> 00:16:33,502
Manifolds are over there. I think we
got an '88 Mustang in there somewhere.
357
00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:35,192
Great. Thank you!
358
00:16:41,867 --> 00:16:42,933
Can I help you?
359
00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:44,569
Uh, no, no. We're just browsing.
360
00:16:44,637 --> 00:16:48,772
Well, if you need anything,
my name is George.
361
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:53,511
Oh, my God, Tim! That's
the guy we met in prison.
362
00:16:53,580 --> 00:16:57,081
I know it! You know, when
we were scalping tickets?
363
00:16:57,149 --> 00:16:59,494
He'll never recognize
us with these getups on.
364
00:16:59,518 --> 00:17:02,687
Hey, wait a minute. Were
you guys ever in county jail?
365
00:17:03,890 --> 00:17:05,590
I think we showered together.
366
00:17:05,658 --> 00:17:09,526
I don't think so. You must have me
mistaken with some other gentleman.
367
00:17:11,797 --> 00:17:15,733
Mustang manifold, something
purple and sticky. Lick it.
368
00:17:19,572 --> 00:17:21,138
What?
369
00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:24,141
Well, you got to make
sure it's the right one. Lick it.
370
00:17:24,611 --> 00:17:25,743
Man!
371
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:31,081
Why is he licking the manifold?
372
00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:34,785
It doesn't make
him a bad person.
373
00:17:34,854 --> 00:17:38,623
That's boysenberry, all right.
I think we have our evidence.
374
00:17:38,691 --> 00:17:41,926
You can stop licking it now.
375
00:17:41,995 --> 00:17:47,999
All right. I think that we found
what we were looking for.
376
00:17:49,168 --> 00:17:50,679
All right. What do
we owe you for that?
377
00:17:50,703 --> 00:17:52,369
Hundred bucks and it's yours.
378
00:17:52,438 --> 00:17:55,958
And I'm sure you'll
probably want it in cash.
379
00:18:00,279 --> 00:18:02,079
Just pay the man, Bobby.
380
00:18:02,148 --> 00:18:05,127
All right. I'll pay. I'll pay
them, all right. And so will they.
381
00:18:05,151 --> 00:18:07,751
Hey, what is that? Some
kind of video recorder?
382
00:18:07,820 --> 00:18:10,254
No. That's his artificial heart.
383
00:18:11,791 --> 00:18:14,892
He keeps an artificial
heart in his fanny pack?
384
00:18:14,961 --> 00:18:17,128
HMOs. What are you gonna do?
385
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:22,266
Hey, wait a minute. I know you.
386
00:18:22,301 --> 00:18:24,835
No, you don't. Yeah.
You're The Tool Man.
387
00:18:24,904 --> 00:18:26,937
The guy who has
all those accidents.
388
00:18:27,006 --> 00:18:28,917
Well, you're about to have
an even bigger accident.
389
00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:30,018
Give me that video camera!
390
00:18:30,042 --> 00:18:31,153
No! Never! Never! Tim, take it!
391
00:18:31,177 --> 00:18:32,510
Run! Run, Tim!
392
00:18:32,579 --> 00:18:34,111
What's going on here?
393
00:18:34,180 --> 00:18:36,625
We got a call from someone
named Heidi that there's a problem.
394
00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:37,827
Oh, no. There's no problem here.
395
00:18:37,851 --> 00:18:39,783
Thank God, you guys are here.
396
00:18:39,852 --> 00:18:43,587
These are hardened criminals. I
know because I met George in prison.
397
00:18:47,159 --> 00:18:49,838
We have evidence that these
gentlemen are selling stolen car parts.
398
00:18:49,862 --> 00:18:51,395
Oh, they don't have squat.
399
00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:55,533
I got more than squat. I got
boysenberry jelly on a manifold.
400
00:18:55,601 --> 00:18:57,279
You got a manifold with jelly?
401
00:18:57,303 --> 00:19:00,743
That's right. I ought
to know. I licked it.
402
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:06,444
This manifold was stolen off my son's
car and I've got a videotape to prove it.
403
00:19:06,512 --> 00:19:08,345
Here you go, officers.
404
00:19:08,414 --> 00:19:10,714
What do you think now, punks?
405
00:19:10,783 --> 00:19:13,584
I can't believe I let
you borrow my soap.
406
00:19:21,193 --> 00:19:23,994
REPORTER: In local
news, a chop shop is busted
407
00:19:24,063 --> 00:19:26,797
thanks to two local
TV personalities.
408
00:19:26,865 --> 00:19:29,300
Their evidence? A jelly donut.
409
00:19:29,368 --> 00:19:32,970
Tim Taylor and Al Borland
used this segment from Tool Time
410
00:19:33,039 --> 00:19:37,975
and a hidden camera
to identify a stolen car.
411
00:19:38,044 --> 00:19:40,344
A hundred bucks and it's yours.
412
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:43,314
Thanks to the jelly tape,
413
00:19:43,382 --> 00:19:46,250
police uncovered a whole
cache of stolen property.
414
00:19:46,319 --> 00:19:49,319
For Channel 8 News,
this is Tiffany Gutierrez.
415
00:19:52,358 --> 00:19:53,735
You know, that just
goes to show you,
416
00:19:53,759 --> 00:19:55,826
you don't have to sit idly
by and become a victim.
417
00:19:55,895 --> 00:19:57,339
You can act on your principles.
418
00:19:57,363 --> 00:19:59,541
I still think it was stupid
for you to go down there.
419
00:19:59,565 --> 00:20:01,343
In the future, I forbid
either one of you
420
00:20:01,367 --> 00:20:03,379
to ever act on your principles.
421
00:20:03,403 --> 00:20:07,238
Yeah, don't worry. Our generation
doesn't have any principles.
422
00:20:07,307 --> 00:20:08,550
Good job, Dad. Thanks.
423
00:20:08,574 --> 00:20:10,085
Yeah. Way to nail those punks.
424
00:20:10,109 --> 00:20:14,044
Now if you excuse me,
I've got a duckling to glaze.
425
00:20:14,113 --> 00:20:16,124
Yeah, I think I'm gonna go
check the newspaper for a new car.
426
00:20:16,148 --> 00:20:18,308
Good. Uh, I know you didn't
want me going down there,
427
00:20:18,350 --> 00:20:19,595
but I just couldn't
stand the thought of
428
00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:21,785
letting those guys
get away with it, okay?
429
00:20:21,854 --> 00:20:24,766
Oh, I just... I hate that our kids
have to think about this kind of stuff.
430
00:20:24,790 --> 00:20:27,235
I don't remember worrying
about it when I was growing up.
431
00:20:27,259 --> 00:20:29,026
You grew up on a military base.
432
00:20:29,095 --> 00:20:30,940
Someone steal a car, they'd
take a bazooka and form the guy...
433
00:20:30,964 --> 00:20:32,407
Tim? Well, you know. Right.
434
00:20:32,431 --> 00:20:33,965
Please.
435
00:20:34,033 --> 00:20:36,244
Now, you know what I mean?
It's just... It's scary out there.
436
00:20:36,268 --> 00:20:38,280
Well, it's a lot less scary
now, thanks to a crime buster
437
00:20:38,304 --> 00:20:40,504
and his partner, Pop'n'Fresh.
438
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:45,955
Well, I'll tell you one thing,
when Brad gets his new car,
439
00:20:45,979 --> 00:20:48,245
he is going to have some
kind of security system,
440
00:20:48,314 --> 00:20:51,148
state-of-the-art,
no expense spared.
441
00:20:51,217 --> 00:20:52,695
Let me guess. It's coming
out of my car budget?
442
00:20:52,719 --> 00:20:53,985
Oh, yeah.
443
00:20:57,156 --> 00:21:00,202
Well, we're just about at the end
of our segment on car security.
444
00:21:00,226 --> 00:21:03,160
But before we go, I'd like
to show you a super-secret,
445
00:21:03,229 --> 00:21:06,496
high-tech alarm system, new
from the boys at Binford R and D.
446
00:21:06,565 --> 00:21:08,210
See, my kid's car
was stolen recently.
447
00:21:08,234 --> 00:21:10,101
In order for that
not to happen again,
448
00:21:10,169 --> 00:21:12,089
we've installed that on
his brand-new car here.
449
00:21:12,138 --> 00:21:13,771
Al, try breaking in.
450
00:21:13,839 --> 00:21:16,374
Oh, no. I'm not falling
for one of your traps again.
451
00:21:16,442 --> 00:21:19,243
Oh, no? Your paycheck's
in the glove box.
452
00:21:20,913 --> 00:21:22,146
Oh, man!
453
00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:26,584
Well, that wasn't so hard. No?
454
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:29,265
Once the perpetrator enters
the vehicle without authorization,
455
00:21:29,289 --> 00:21:31,933
the car snaps into action, locking
the doors and rolling up the windows.
456
00:21:31,957 --> 00:21:33,123
(ALARM BLARING)
457
00:21:33,192 --> 00:21:34,558
Tim!
458
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:37,461
And, finally, before
the police arrive,
459
00:21:37,529 --> 00:21:41,165
you want to put your thief
under a little bit of pressure.
460
00:21:41,234 --> 00:21:42,933
(YELLING)
461
00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:54,522
I've checked the oil, the fan
belt and the master cylinder.
462
00:21:54,546 --> 00:21:56,580
Everything checks out a-okay.
463
00:21:56,648 --> 00:22:00,384
And now we're under the hood
completing a compression test.
464
00:22:03,889 --> 00:22:05,422
Way to nail those punks.
465
00:22:05,491 --> 00:22:09,226
Now if you excuse me,
I've got a duckling to glaze.
466
00:22:09,295 --> 00:22:10,872
(THUD) Yeah, I think I... Wow!
467
00:22:10,896 --> 00:22:12,363
Get down!
468
00:22:16,169 --> 00:22:18,049
What was that? What was that?
468
00:22:19,305 --> 00:23:19,525
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