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Ripped By mstoll
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(slurps)
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Gentlemen,
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do not be alarmed if you
hear any loud noises
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coming from my property
over the next few days.
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I'm just blowing stuff up.
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Look what I found
at the library!
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'How to Blow Stuff Up!
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You're making a bomb?
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Several. I'm engaged
in an arms race
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with an exterminator
in McMaynerberry.
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You could get in a lot of
trouble for this, Dale.
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I'm pretty sure the government
keeps track of books like that.
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At least I hope they do.
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00:00:59,692 --> 00:01:03,526
You mean Rusty Shackleford
could get in a lot of trouble.
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00:01:03,696 --> 00:01:06,790
I have a library card
in his name. Sha-sha!
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(sighs): Are you still
pretending to be that guy?
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It's a victimless crime,
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like eating grapes
at the supermarket.
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Or stealing coupons from
Hank's Sunday newspaper...
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Boomhauer.
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I want you to all look
at the plate
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in front of you...
What do you see?
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Steak!
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That's right. Steak.
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That's what you eat when you're
a member of Team Sizemore,
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the number one Realtor
in Heimlich County.
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But this month's top sellers
get something more.
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They get to eat steak...
with me.
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Oh, the view must be great
from up there.
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And this month's
lucky diner is...
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(quietly):
Peggy Hill!
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Candi and Roger!
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Oh, yeah! Yeah!
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Damn it!
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(laughs):
Come on, you two!
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Bring your steaks on up here.
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(applauding)
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Ta-ta!
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It's easy to be
the top salesperson
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when you sell Arlen Heights.
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Peggy is the real hero...
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Trying to move those houses
in Belchefs Grove.
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(chuckles) CANDI:
Don't worry,
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you'll get here one day,
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one shack at a time.
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(Candi chuckling) ROGER: Oh!
Ooh, ouch.
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HANK:
Why do we have to watch
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a foreign movie?
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If it was any good,
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they would've made
an American version.
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Do you think
I am enjoying this? No.
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Bull need upscale clients
in places like Arlen Heights.
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Wealthy people like culture.
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Cultured people watch
foreign movies.
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Something's happening!
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(man on TV groans)
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(sighs):
This is ridiculous.
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Ridiculous?!
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Are you kidding, Dad?
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Colette is gonna
leave Etienne for Claude
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because Etienne has malaise.
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Malaise!
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That guy just sprouted wings.
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All right, that's it, Peggy,
I'm gonna have to ask you
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to relinquish
the remote control.
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Fine! I'll watch the rest
at Minh's.
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I bet she likes foreign movies...
She's a foreigner.
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To her, it's just a movie.
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TED: Dinner was splendid.
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I suppose it would be appropriate
for us to reciprocate.
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We're having a party
this weekend.
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We'd love it if
you could make it.
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Oh, we'll be there!
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And then maybe this summer,
we come visit
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at your beach house on the Gulf.
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Uh... of course.
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Well, let's set a date!
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I get calendar.
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Please, do not
make this awkward.
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(doorbell rings)
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I'll get it.
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Oh, it's the Wassonasongs.
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(gasps):
Of Arlen Heights!
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Well, how is life
in The Heights?
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You know, I'm a Realtor...
Are you looking to sell?
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Because I just watched
this wonderful French movie.
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Actually, Ted and I
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are thinking about
selling our house.
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We're having a little
party this weekend.
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You should come...
We could talk more.
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(gasps) Make sure new
guesthouse has big room,
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so I can drop off
present... me!
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(Dale humming a tune)
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"Set the timer and retreat
to a safe distance."
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'Key.
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Oh, my lucky hat!
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(relieved sigh)
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My smokes!
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(explosion)
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Thanks for the ride, Hank.
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If I pass out before
we get to the hospital,
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tell them my name
is Rusty Shackleford.
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He's got great insurance...
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Medicaid. This is the dumbest
thing you've ever done.
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You could have lost a finger.
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C-Correction: Rusty Shackleford
could have lost a finger.
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(Sighs)
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Hello. I'm Peggy Hill.
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I'm a guest of the Wassonasongs.
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You're on the list.
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Welcome to Arlen Heights.
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Peggy!
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Come on in. Oh, I'm not
trying to pressure you,
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but I thought I'd bring
this sign in just in case.
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(quietly):
Jackpot!
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Hi. Peggy Hill,
Sizemore Realty.
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Hello. Peggy Hill,
Sizemore Really.
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MRS. WASSONASONG:
Take your seats, everybody.
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The presentation
is about to begin.
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Presentation?
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That's right.
All the products you see
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in this kitchen are made
by the Cozy Kitchen Company,
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and I am your Cozy Kitchen
saleslady.
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00:05:46,479 --> 00:05:48,208
Hey, this not a party.
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It's an ambush. You think
if we buy fancy corkscrew,
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we'll get invited
to beach house?
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(chuckles quietly):
I know what I'm buying...
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A giant spatula
to flip this house.
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(doorbell rings)
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Dale Gribble?
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00:06:05,932 --> 00:06:07,695
Maybe. Who's asking?
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00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:09,869
Rusty Shackleford.
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00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:12,030
Du... Wha.?!
It's me, Dale.
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00:06:12,138 --> 00:06:13,400
But-but that's impossible.
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Rusty died in third grade.
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I didn't die. I moved.
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You need to stop using
my name, Dale.
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I am not using your name.
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And I am not Dale!
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Come on, Dale,
you're smoking the same brand
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00:06:23,916 --> 00:06:25,474
of cigarettes you did
in the third grade.
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Get off my property,
whoever I am!
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(siren blaring)
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Ta-da!
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Cozy Kitchen makes spaghetti
so authentic
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you'll say "Mama Mia!"
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(laughs)
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00:06:44,504 --> 00:06:45,971
(angry groan)
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00:06:46,105 --> 00:06:49,871
Now, let's mingle
and place orders.
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One five-bedroom colonial
with a side of multiple offers?
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00:06:53,713 --> 00:06:55,476
(both laugh)
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00:06:55,681 --> 00:06:58,047
Oh Peggy, you're a delight.
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00:06:58,184 --> 00:07:00,414
But I'm having second
thoughts about moving.
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What? You can't.
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00:07:02,321 --> 00:07:04,687
This is my way
into Arlen Heights.
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00:07:04,824 --> 00:07:07,122
Is it the commission?
I'll cut it in half.
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00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:08,521
Oh, it's not the commission.
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00:07:08,728 --> 00:07:10,320
These people aren't
just my customers,
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they've become my friends.
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Who will take care of them?
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I will... I will take over
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as Cozy Kitchen
representative for you.
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I will sell your house;
I'll even help you pack.
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I am a full-service Realtor.
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Wow, Peggy, you sure are
making this easy for me.
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00:07:26,379 --> 00:07:28,847
But I need to talk to Ted first.
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00:07:36,155 --> 00:07:37,782
It's done. We're free.
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Super.
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(train whistle blows)
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So wait, how is selling
kitchen appliances
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gonna help you sell houses?
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Cozy Kitchen gets me
in the door,
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00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:54,633
then Peggy the Realtor
sells the house.
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00:07:54,740 --> 00:07:56,002
Look at all these free samples.
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00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,404
You see this can opener, Hank?
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00:07:57,577 --> 00:08:01,138
This is also a door opener.
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00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:05,273
Wow! A toaster
that only cooks hot dogs?
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00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:07,648
That's not a toaster, Bobby.
What is it?
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00:08:07,787 --> 00:08:10,085
A door opener!
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00:08:10,223 --> 00:08:11,190
Exactly!
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00:08:11,357 --> 00:08:12,756
And once I open enough doors,
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00:08:12,892 --> 00:08:14,359
I will be the top seller
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00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:16,585
eating steak at Chris's table.
186
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:22,992
What are you doing here?
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00:08:23,102 --> 00:08:24,933
You're along way
from Belcher's Grove.
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00:08:25,037 --> 00:08:26,436
Peggy, I've been wondering...
In Belcher's,
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00:08:26,572 --> 00:08:29,097
do you count a couch on
the roof as a family room?
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00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:30,334
(laughs)
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00:08:30,476 --> 00:08:32,068
(chuckles):
Oh-ho-ho, sometimes.
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00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:35,043
But right now,
I'm visiting clients.
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00:08:39,018 --> 00:08:40,883
PEGGY:
Ta-ta!
194
00:08:41,587 --> 00:08:43,418
(doorbell rings)
195
00:08:43,556 --> 00:08:44,648
Hi.
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00:08:44,790 --> 00:08:46,087
I am Peggy Hill,
197
00:08:46,225 --> 00:08:48,659
member of Sizemore
Realty, and your new
198
00:08:48,794 --> 00:08:50,125
Cozy Kitchen...
199
00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:51,855
representative.
200
00:08:51,998 --> 00:08:55,024
(shouts): I'm leaving a
free sample and my card.
201
00:09:08,614 --> 00:09:10,172
I-I really need
to talk to Dale.
202
00:09:10,316 --> 00:09:12,147
I'm trying to get
a small business loan,
203
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:14,219
but the bank thinks
I'm the same guy
204
00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:17,550
who skipped town on a string
of failing alpaca farms.
205
00:09:17,690 --> 00:09:19,851
Well, if we see him,
we'll give him the message.
206
00:09:20,026 --> 00:09:21,755
I want to handle this
like gentlemen, but...
207
00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:24,124
well, I'm not leaving town
until it's sorted out.
208
00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:25,821
Nice meeting you!
209
00:09:27,934 --> 00:09:29,868
Did you hear that?
210
00:09:29,969 --> 00:09:30,936
He's not leaving.
211
00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:32,401
(grunts)
212
00:09:32,538 --> 00:09:34,096
He's gonna hunt me
like an animal
213
00:09:34,273 --> 00:09:36,173
and kill me...
like an animal!
214
00:09:36,309 --> 00:09:37,401
I was never here!
215
00:09:39,946 --> 00:09:41,914
Could someone toss me a beer.
216
00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:46,942
Can I help you?
217
00:09:47,119 --> 00:09:49,815
Hey there. I'm Judy Barnes,
Cozy Kitchen Corporate.
218
00:09:49,989 --> 00:09:53,322
I just wanted to stop by
to welcome you in person.
219
00:09:53,459 --> 00:09:55,120
It's fun, isn't it?
220
00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:57,354
Well, I'm not getting
the warmest reaction,
221
00:09:57,530 --> 00:10:00,624
and the free samples didn't
help out as much I expected.
222
00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:03,598
That wasn't a sample kit, silly.
223
00:10:03,703 --> 00:10:06,171
That was your first
inventory shipment.
224
00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,137
Aw, well, potato, po-tah-to.
225
00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:09,639
No. Potato.
226
00:10:09,742 --> 00:10:12,802
You owe us money, lots of money.
227
00:10:12,945 --> 00:10:16,210
You probably don't realize how
threatening you're coming off,
228
00:10:16,349 --> 00:10:17,816
even with the smile.
229
00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:19,577
Peggy, bless your heart.
230
00:10:19,719 --> 00:10:22,745
I don't think you understand
how deep you're in.
231
00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:25,652
I suggest you read
your contract.
232
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:29,894
"No right to arbitration...
233
00:10:30,029 --> 00:10:32,293
serious financial
ramifications."
234
00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:34,228
And it's not
just the starter kit!
235
00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:36,198
I also have monthly quotas!
236
00:10:36,335 --> 00:10:37,768
They've got me over a barrel.
237
00:10:37,903 --> 00:10:39,700
This is just like
that time I had
238
00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:42,137
to sell all those
candy bars for school.
239
00:10:42,241 --> 00:10:46,177
Is there any way you can eat
your way out of this?
240
00:10:46,278 --> 00:10:47,745
I'm afraid not, Bobby.
241
00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:49,575
I need to get
those samples back.
242
00:10:58,891 --> 00:11:01,086
Excuse me,
the gate isn't working.
243
00:11:01,260 --> 00:11:03,023
We had to change all the codes.
244
00:11:03,162 --> 00:11:05,027
Some saleslady
was harassing people.
245
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:06,495
I see.
246
00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:08,429
You know what
that guard shack needs?
247
00:11:09,535 --> 00:11:10,934
A panini maker.
248
00:11:11,070 --> 00:11:13,300
Please exit the Heights.
249
00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:14,997
(horns honking)
250
00:11:26,752 --> 00:11:27,844
What's all this?
251
00:11:28,087 --> 00:11:29,315
Next month's product.
252
00:11:29,455 --> 00:11:30,717
Your garage was locked.
253
00:11:30,856 --> 00:11:32,824
I hope you don't mind,
we used a crow bar.
254
00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:35,017
But I haven't sold
this month's product yet.
255
00:11:35,227 --> 00:11:36,387
If I were you,
256
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:37,928
I'd quit arguing
and start selling...
257
00:11:39,865 --> 00:11:41,560
because Cozy Kitchen is going
to get their money
258
00:11:41,667 --> 00:11:42,861
one way or the other.
259
00:11:42,968 --> 00:11:44,458
(engine cranking)
260
00:11:44,637 --> 00:11:46,434
Love your roses!
261
00:11:52,411 --> 00:11:54,470
Oh, hey, Sug. What's up?
262
00:11:54,613 --> 00:11:56,706
I came over to apologize.
263
00:11:56,849 --> 00:12:00,341
I have been so busy selling Cozy
Kitchen to Arlen Heights,
264
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,077
I've completely
ignored my friends.
265
00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:03,347
Here.
266
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:05,353
Just circle what you want.
267
00:12:07,226 --> 00:12:09,558
Okay, um...
268
00:12:09,695 --> 00:12:11,993
Oh!
269
00:12:12,131 --> 00:12:13,621
I'll take one of these.
270
00:12:13,766 --> 00:12:15,324
A vegetable peeler?
271
00:12:15,468 --> 00:12:18,926
A $12 vegetable peeler?!
272
00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:20,800
Well, I don't need
anything else.
273
00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:22,430
Who cares?!
How about a juicer?
274
00:12:22,608 --> 00:12:23,768
A crepe pan?
275
00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:25,171
Help me out.
I'm dying here!
276
00:12:25,311 --> 00:12:26,539
You're hurtin' me, sug.
277
00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:27,646
(car door shuts)
278
00:12:54,173 --> 00:12:55,606
(thump)
279
00:12:55,741 --> 00:12:56,867
Peggy?
280
00:12:57,009 --> 00:12:58,135
What are you doing?
281
00:12:58,277 --> 00:13:00,404
I tried calling,
but you didn't answer.
282
00:13:00,579 --> 00:13:03,139
Cozy Kitchen
is not going so well.
283
00:13:03,282 --> 00:13:05,512
But it's okay,
I have the perfect solution:
284
00:13:05,651 --> 00:13:07,642
Let's get this house
on the market, huh?
285
00:13:07,820 --> 00:13:09,811
About the house,
Peggy-
286
00:13:09,955 --> 00:13:11,388
It's just, a...
287
00:13:11,524 --> 00:13:12,786
a bad time of year for us...
288
00:13:12,925 --> 00:13:14,654
and, uh...
289
00:13:14,827 --> 00:13:16,852
Oh, for goodness sake, Cindy,
look at her. Just tell her.
290
00:13:16,996 --> 00:13:20,056
You're not planning
to sell the house, are you?
291
00:13:20,199 --> 00:13:21,632
No.
292
00:13:21,734 --> 00:13:23,224
I'm sorry.
293
00:13:23,369 --> 00:13:25,735
I had to get out of my contract
and the only way
294
00:13:25,871 --> 00:13:27,429
was to find a replacement.
295
00:13:27,573 --> 00:13:29,040
We did what we had to do.
296
00:13:29,141 --> 00:13:31,109
We tried to disappear
from the face of the Earth
297
00:13:31,277 --> 00:13:32,744
by holing up at our beach house.
298
00:13:32,912 --> 00:13:33,936
It's on an island!
299
00:13:34,113 --> 00:13:35,603
They still found us.
300
00:13:35,748 --> 00:13:36,942
They have motorboats, Peggy!
301
00:13:37,783 --> 00:13:38,841
Motorboats.
302
00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:40,049
CINDY:
You have no idea
303
00:13:40,152 --> 00:13:41,813
what Cozy Kitchen is capable of.
304
00:13:42,054 --> 00:13:43,021
If you want out,
305
00:13:43,189 --> 00:13:44,417
you have to find a better way
306
00:13:44,590 --> 00:13:45,614
to disappear than we did.
307
00:13:45,791 --> 00:13:47,224
Or find your own patsy.
308
00:13:49,295 --> 00:13:52,423
LUANNE: I'm going to be a
Cozy Kitchen representative.
309
00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:54,693
Oh, thank you, Aunt Peggy.
310
00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:56,131
I'm gonna wear pink,
311
00:13:56,268 --> 00:13:57,667
and learn to cook and...
312
00:13:57,770 --> 00:14:00,534
and, oh, God, oh, God,
I can't believe
313
00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:02,197
I have this great job!
314
00:14:02,341 --> 00:14:03,467
You hear that, baby?
315
00:14:03,609 --> 00:14:04,598
We're gonna be okay!
316
00:14:04,743 --> 00:14:05,903
Stop!
317
00:14:06,078 --> 00:14:07,511
I cannot let you do this.
318
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:10,171
But you promised.
319
00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:11,714
I - I'm sorry, Luanne.
320
00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:13,751
It's a scam.
321
00:14:13,953 --> 00:14:16,615
I want to sell Cozy Kitchen!
322
00:14:20,826 --> 00:14:22,225
Come on.
323
00:14:22,561 --> 00:14:24,188
One more leprechaun.
324
00:14:24,363 --> 00:14:25,523
Dammit.
325
00:14:25,731 --> 00:14:27,164
(doorbell rings)
326
00:14:33,005 --> 00:14:35,473
(telephone rings)
327
00:14:48,787 --> 00:14:49,776
DALE:
Ow!
328
00:14:49,922 --> 00:14:51,549
Shh!
329
00:14:56,295 --> 00:14:57,626
(whispering):
What are you doing?
330
00:14:57,763 --> 00:14:58,855
Hiding.
331
00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:00,090
And you're blowing my cover!
332
00:15:00,266 --> 00:15:01,528
This is my hedge.
333
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:02,725
Go find your own.
334
00:15:02,868 --> 00:15:03,926
I was here first.
335
00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:05,434
And Hank deeded
this hedge to me.
336
00:15:05,537 --> 00:15:07,334
He didn't want you to
get it in the divorce.
337
00:15:07,473 --> 00:15:08,440
Shh!
338
00:15:21,220 --> 00:15:22,016
Dale?
339
00:15:22,187 --> 00:15:22,846
Who are you...
340
00:15:23,022 --> 00:15:23,920
Stifle, woman.
341
00:15:24,189 --> 00:15:26,157
I think I hear
Shackleford's car.
342
00:15:30,162 --> 00:15:31,356
Who's Shackleford?
343
00:15:31,497 --> 00:15:33,158
The man whose identity I stole.
344
00:15:33,299 --> 00:15:34,266
Who are you hiding from?
345
00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:35,628
Cozy Kitchen.
346
00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:37,167
The people who
made our vegetable peeler?
347
00:15:37,269 --> 00:15:38,600
That thing's great!
348
00:15:44,877 --> 00:15:47,744
All I wanted was
to sell a big house,
349
00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:49,643
get to sit at Chris's
little table
350
00:15:49,815 --> 00:15:51,407
and get some respect.
351
00:15:51,550 --> 00:15:53,484
All I wanted was a fall guy,
352
00:15:53,652 --> 00:15:55,244
so I'd never have to take
responsibility
353
00:15:55,421 --> 00:15:56,513
for my actions.
354
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:58,987
They're destroying
my realty career.
355
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:00,421
They're threatening
to take everything,
356
00:16:00,559 --> 00:16:02,083
and I can't tell Hank about it.
357
00:16:02,227 --> 00:16:03,524
I don't know where to turn.
358
00:16:03,696 --> 00:16:04,663
Me neither.
359
00:16:04,763 --> 00:16:06,094
There's no escape!
360
00:16:06,231 --> 00:16:08,256
Maybe if I killed myself
he'd leave me alone.
361
00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:10,460
While you're at it,
take me out, too.
362
00:16:10,569 --> 00:16:14,005
Peggy, it would be my pleasure.
363
00:16:14,139 --> 00:16:16,004
A murder/suicide pact.
364
00:16:16,141 --> 00:16:17,631
That might work.
365
00:16:17,776 --> 00:16:20,643
If Shackleford and Cozy Kitchen
think we're dead,
366
00:16:20,779 --> 00:16:22,406
they'll stop looking for us.
367
00:16:22,581 --> 00:16:24,208
Let's do it.
368
00:16:24,383 --> 00:16:25,680
I'll pretend to kill you
369
00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:27,513
and then pretend to
take my own life.
370
00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:28,950
Pretend?
371
00:16:29,088 --> 00:16:30,783
Ah, well, I guess I'm still in.
372
00:16:33,058 --> 00:16:35,117
Okay, here's the story.
373
00:16:35,260 --> 00:16:36,818
We stole Bill's car.
374
00:16:37,029 --> 00:16:38,053
That part's true.
375
00:16:38,230 --> 00:16:39,959
Then we drove it
into the ravine.
376
00:16:40,065 --> 00:16:41,362
And you think that's
really going
377
00:16:41,467 --> 00:16:42,798
to convince people we're dead?
378
00:16:42,935 --> 00:16:44,095
How hard can it be?
379
00:16:44,303 --> 00:16:45,702
Shackleford convinced me
he was dead
380
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:46,930
in the third grade.
381
00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:57,342
It appears Bill needs
to have his tires aligned.
382
00:16:58,684 --> 00:16:59,651
Run!
383
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:05,684
Hmm.
384
00:17:07,226 --> 00:17:09,820
Well, Bill's gonna need
a new seat.
385
00:17:12,998 --> 00:17:14,590
After we throw the dummies
into the water,
386
00:17:14,733 --> 00:17:16,792
we leave a suicide note
on the railing.
387
00:17:16,935 --> 00:17:18,926
The swift current will tear
the dummies apart,
388
00:17:19,071 --> 00:17:21,198
and the cops won't find a thing.
389
00:17:21,373 --> 00:17:23,170
Well, then why throw the dummies
in the first place?
390
00:17:23,275 --> 00:17:24,242
Who would even know?
391
00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:25,604
We'd know.
392
00:17:25,778 --> 00:17:27,177
Show a little pride, Peggy.
393
00:17:27,312 --> 00:17:28,779
(garage door opening)
394
00:17:30,682 --> 00:17:32,479
Oh, Hank. You're home early.
395
00:17:32,651 --> 00:17:34,141
Huh? No, I'm not.
396
00:17:34,286 --> 00:17:36,049
What's going on
with those dummies?
397
00:17:36,188 --> 00:17:37,485
Maybe this is good.
398
00:17:37,656 --> 00:17:39,385
We could use a witness
to our fake deaths.
399
00:17:39,525 --> 00:17:40,617
To your what?
400
00:17:40,759 --> 00:17:42,488
Did I not mention this to you?
401
00:17:44,496 --> 00:17:46,430
HANK: What the hell
were you thinking?
402
00:17:46,565 --> 00:17:48,260
I was out of options, Hank.
403
00:17:48,367 --> 00:17:51,097
I couldn't sell a house to cover
the cost of the pots and pans.
404
00:17:51,203 --> 00:17:53,034
If you have any better ideas
405
00:17:53,138 --> 00:17:55,606
than murder-suicide
I would love to hear them.
406
00:17:55,774 --> 00:17:59,335
Well, why don't you throw one
of those parties like Cindy did?
407
00:17:59,511 --> 00:18:00,978
Yes! That's good!
408
00:18:01,146 --> 00:18:03,376
Then I could find a patsy
that I'm not related to!
409
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:05,483
No! Then you could
at least prove
410
00:18:05,617 --> 00:18:08,108
to this Judy woman
that you're trying your best.
411
00:18:08,253 --> 00:18:09,811
And then Judy
could tell corporate
412
00:18:09,988 --> 00:18:11,512
what she sees at the party.
413
00:18:11,657 --> 00:18:12,954
This could work, Hank.
414
00:18:17,329 --> 00:18:17,920
Judy,
415
00:18:18,197 --> 00:18:20,290
I'm so glad you could make it.
416
00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:22,491
I presume you have
a check for me.
417
00:18:22,634 --> 00:18:24,795
We'll talk
after my presentation.
418
00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:26,863
(doorbell rings)
419
00:18:27,039 --> 00:18:28,097
DALE:
Coming.
420
00:18:31,743 --> 00:18:32,539
Ha ha!
421
00:18:32,611 --> 00:18:34,704
You'll never catch me,
Shackleford!
422
00:18:37,749 --> 00:18:40,912
And thanks to my Cozy Kitchen
nonstick frying pan,
423
00:18:41,053 --> 00:18:42,315
$49.99,
424
00:18:42,454 --> 00:18:44,115
my eggs slide onto the plate.
425
00:18:44,256 --> 00:18:45,951
(applause)
426
00:18:46,859 --> 00:18:47,382
Help!
427
00:18:47,559 --> 00:18:48,856
You gotta hide me!
428
00:18:49,027 --> 00:18:51,120
Shackleford is on his way.
429
00:18:51,263 --> 00:18:52,730
Dale, if you are not here
430
00:18:52,865 --> 00:18:55,197
to make a purchase,
I must ask you to leave.
431
00:18:55,334 --> 00:18:58,303
Ah, then I am taking
you as my hostage.
432
00:18:58,437 --> 00:19:00,598
Ha!
No!
433
00:19:00,772 --> 00:19:02,171
Oh, Lord.
434
00:19:02,274 --> 00:19:03,468
Ah!
Oh!
435
00:19:03,642 --> 00:19:04,609
Ahh!
Stop it!
436
00:19:04,743 --> 00:19:05,835
Let go!
437
00:19:06,011 --> 00:19:07,672
No!
Dale!
438
00:19:11,917 --> 00:19:14,909
That does it, Dale,
I will kill you!
439
00:19:15,087 --> 00:19:18,079
If you kill me,
I'm taking you with me!
440
00:19:18,223 --> 00:19:19,190
Oh, no you won't!
441
00:19:19,324 --> 00:19:20,291
Yeah!
(grunting)
442
00:19:23,028 --> 00:19:24,393
PEGGY: No, stop! Sha-shaw!
443
00:19:35,307 --> 00:19:37,298
What the heck is going on?
444
00:19:37,543 --> 00:19:39,408
We still have a chance.
445
00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:41,743
Act like a ghost.
446
00:19:47,152 --> 00:19:48,141
Wow.
447
00:19:48,253 --> 00:19:49,845
This pan's amazing.
448
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:51,819
I'm riddled with tiny shrapnel,
449
00:19:51,957 --> 00:19:53,618
but it doesn't
have a scratch on it.
450
00:19:53,825 --> 00:19:54,849
Ooh.
Hmm.
451
00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:56,426
I could make one
helluva flapjack
452
00:19:56,562 --> 00:19:57,893
with that honey.
453
00:19:58,063 --> 00:20:01,032
Yep, Cozy Kitchen makes
a quality product,
454
00:20:01,133 --> 00:20:02,191
I tell you what.
455
00:20:02,301 --> 00:20:04,531
If it can survive an explosion
456
00:20:04,670 --> 00:20:06,103
imagine how it will stand up
457
00:20:06,238 --> 00:20:08,706
to the demands of
the modern kitchen.
458
00:20:08,807 --> 00:20:10,035
I'll take one.
459
00:20:10,175 --> 00:20:11,802
Yeah, lemme have one
of those bad boys.
460
00:20:11,944 --> 00:20:14,310
Yeah, me, too. Do they come
in other sizes? If I sell
461
00:20:14,479 --> 00:20:16,379
my entire inventory today
462
00:20:16,548 --> 00:20:18,175
will you please let me out
of my contract?
463
00:20:18,917 --> 00:20:20,111
No.
464
00:20:20,285 --> 00:20:21,920
I'm never getting out, am I?
465
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:23,888
There might be one way.
466
00:20:24,022 --> 00:20:27,514
If corporate thinks I died
in the explosion, too.
467
00:20:28,527 --> 00:20:30,256
Consider it done.
468
00:20:31,697 --> 00:20:33,062
We need to settle this
469
00:20:33,198 --> 00:20:35,132
whole identity theft issue
once and for all.
470
00:20:35,267 --> 00:20:37,030
Oh, God, a gun.
471
00:20:37,169 --> 00:20:38,568
Die like a man, Gribble.
472
00:20:38,704 --> 00:20:40,194
Die like a man.
473
00:20:40,872 --> 00:20:42,965
Just sign these forms
so I can get on with my life.
474
00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:49,642
Okay.
475
00:20:50,816 --> 00:20:51,942
You know, Judy,
476
00:20:52,150 --> 00:20:54,380
you're going to need
to disappear for a while.
477
00:20:54,519 --> 00:20:56,282
I know the perfect hideaway,
478
00:20:56,421 --> 00:20:58,685
a sunny two-bedroom
in Arlen Heights.
479
00:20:58,890 --> 00:20:59,857
Really?
480
00:20:59,925 --> 00:21:01,222
Mm-hmm. Call me.
481
00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:03,123
We'll set up a tour.
482
00:21:09,167 --> 00:21:12,398
The view really
is beautiful from up here.
483
00:21:51,910 --> 00:21:55,107
CINDY: They have motorboats, peggy.
TED: Motorboats!
484
00:21:58,500 --> 00:22:06,500
Ripped By mstoll
484
00:22:07,305 --> 00:23:07,858
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