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Ho, boy, another day
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of triple digit temperatures.
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Now it's official,
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this heat wave has lasted longer than my second marriage.
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So wherever you are, Rhonda, this song goes out to you.
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Oh, too hot.
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Can't make it to my house.
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Mm-hmm. Dang.
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Well, I'll be.
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I guess that makes it official.
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It's summer, all right.
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Is it me or did it just get a few degrees cooler
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since Boomhauer walked out.
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Aw, man, dang ol' breezy, man.
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Man, that's a straight cut.
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Will you do me a half shirt?
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Nice daisy dukes.
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Bobby, have you seen my...
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Joseph, isn't it time you think about, uh, heading home?
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I can't take it at my house.
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My dad has the heat cranked all the way up.
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He said something about fighting fire with fire,
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but it wasn't working for me. Quiet!
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Look.
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Now featuring, the Big Ka-tube-ah.
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The hottest, coolest wave in Texas!
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We have to go!
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Dad, will you take us?
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Please?
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Yeah, you gotta take us, dude.
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I'm starting to leave a butt-puddle.
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Fine. Just put on your pants.
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Oh, that's not good at all.
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Hank Hill here.
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Hank, it's Bill.
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I got a flat on the bypass.
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It's hot, it's hot!
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It's so hot!
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You gotta come get me.
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Fine.
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Dangit, now I gotta go pick up Mr. Dauterive.
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You kids remember the exit to the water park?
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No, dude, it's...
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No, it's...
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It's right there.
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Thank God.
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Where's Hank?
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I, I can't take it!
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Help! I need help!
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They're waving at me.
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They're really waving at me.
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I'm waving at you!
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And you and you!
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Hello!
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Do you guys hear that?
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That's water!
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Look how high that slide goes.
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That's "The Avalanche,"
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and it's horrifying.
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Some kid went on it,
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and all that came out the bottom was a bathing suit.
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They never found him.
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I heard in the middle of the slide,
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there's a moment where you're traveling so fast,
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you actually become water.
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Three tickets, please.
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Would you like to get summer passes?
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No. Please, Dad.
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If you won't do it for me, do it for your lawn.
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A slip and slide can be very destructive.
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Okay, but this is your entire summer entertainment budget.
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Don't come to me in a couple of days
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and say you're bored of the water park
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like you did with the French horn lessons,
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the karate lessons,
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and spy camp. I won't.
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I'll be too refreshed to bother you.
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Hey, man, dang ol' air hockey, man?
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Who wants to dang ol' take on the champ, man?
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Let me see what you got.
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Hi there!
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Have a nice day!
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Well, your tire's fixed.
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You can get out of here now.
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In a minute. Ooh!
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I got a school bus coming.
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Hey there, children!
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Uh, Bill, it's over a hundred degrees out,
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and you don't have... uh, how do I say this?
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You don't have many... health assets.
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You should get inside.
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It is a hot one today, I'll tell you.
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Too hot for pants.
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Yikes, I gotta work with this guy, people,
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and he's serious about taking off his pants.
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I am, but I'll tell you, one resident of Arlen
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is offering this community a little relief from the heat
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in the form of a kind, cool wave from the side of the highway.
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People toss around the word "hero,"
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but this guy's a real hero.
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I don't know his name, so I guess
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we can only call him the Heat-Waver.
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Thank you, Heat-Waver.
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They talked about me on the radio!
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I matter!
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Take that, Dad!
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That's the kid from the commercial.
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And he's going bananas!
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Visor dude, you're in.
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Hot girl, you're definitely in.
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What about us?
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Why don't you kiddies hit up the tad pool?
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Get out of here.
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Locals only, mothers!
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Get off our wave!
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Maybe we should go.
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No way.
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I didn't spend my entire summer budget
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to slide down a little frog tongue.
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Can I help you?
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Oh, thank goodness, an adult.
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We want to ride, but they won't let us.
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I see.
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Then I guess it sucks to be you.
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What?
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I have a summer pass
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and I demand to cool down and get wet!
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Hey, Harkey.
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These kids want to get wet.
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You know what that means.
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Yeah, full on, Bodie.
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Welcome to The Avalanche.
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You must ride feet first
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with your arms crossed over your chest.
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Don't do this!
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Ride this wave, Grommet.
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I think he just turned into water.
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They wouldn't let us ride because we weren't "locals."
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Locals only?
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That's the most insane thing I've ever heard of.
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Nobody lives in an amusement park.
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That is so weird because I always
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have really good experiences with surfers.
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Didn't they help put your sunscreen on, Bobby?
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No.
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I got it.
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I have found that bullies
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are actually very insecure.
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Tomorrow, tell him he has a nice smile,
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and he will become your best friend.
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I'm not going back.
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They specifically told me not to.
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By the way, I'm gonna need some money for the mall.
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No, you don't.
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We're going back to that water park
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and I'll deal with those locals.
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Not all surfers are bad, Bobby.
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I read in a magazine about a girl surfer
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who was attacked by a shark, and against all odds,
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she still managed to be pretty.
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Happy Hump Day!
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Hang in there, it's almost Friday!
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Buckle up now!
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Stay cool, Arlen!
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Welcome to Big Water!
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Can I point you to the gift shop?
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No. My son wants to ride on your endless wave,
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but some giblet heads won't let him.
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They're giblet heads!
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And the last time I checked, this was America.
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U.S. A!
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That is terrible.
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I will take care of this immediately.
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Big Water may be owned by Germans,
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but we have very American policies
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when it comes to customer service.
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Well, all right.
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Excuse me, Bodie.
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Can I speak to you for a second?
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Of course, Tim. What's up?
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Tell him what's up, Tim.
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This kid's daddy just came and talked to me about you guys.
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I just call him "Dad."
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Dangit, Bodie, I don't ask any questions
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about what goes on on Coconut Island.
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Now, I'm leaving this boy in your hands,
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and I don't want to have to come back here.
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In fact, I'm not coming back because I trust
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that you'll take care of this situation.
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Yes, sir, Tim.
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No, no, no, wait!
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Wait, Tim!
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Don't leave now!
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Tim!
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Yep. Yup.
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Oh, man.
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What are you kids doing back already?
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The locals messed with us again.
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I go to get the kids and those punks
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throw me down Avalanche, too.
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And they disrespected my half-shirt.
203
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Well, what happened to the manager?
204
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That manager made things worse.
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I got thrown down the Avalanche, naked!
206
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:09,797
Joseph, why didn't you help him?
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Because I ran away.
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Nicely done.
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I'm never going back to that park again
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so long as there are surfers.
211
00:11:18,244 --> 00:11:20,804
Maybe you could talk to those guys, Boomhauer.
212
00:11:20,980 --> 00:11:24,438
Boomhauer used to be the best surfer in Corpus Christi.
213
00:11:24,617 --> 00:11:26,244
Now, I don't know about that, man.
214
00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:27,511
What do you mean?
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You were amazing. King of the beach.
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A golden god on a wooden board.
217
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Not too bad.
218
00:11:35,094 --> 00:11:36,425
You know, that ol...
219
00:11:36,595 --> 00:11:38,529
Do you really think you could talk some sense
220
00:11:38,664 --> 00:11:39,824
into these guys, Boomhauer?
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Of course he could!
222
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Wow!
223
00:11:52,078 --> 00:11:53,375
Look how stable he is.
224
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Is this even surfing?
225
00:12:01,087 --> 00:12:02,714
I think he's kayaking.
226
00:12:12,164 --> 00:12:14,029
Bill, what are you doing out here? You look terrible!
227
00:12:14,166 --> 00:12:15,656
We got to get you inside now.
228
00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:18,502
I won't go!
229
00:12:18,671 --> 00:12:21,139
I have a responsibility to the people of Arlen.
230
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Stop looking at me like that, Peggy.
231
00:12:27,012 --> 00:12:28,741
Stop it!
232
00:12:40,126 --> 00:12:41,684
Yeah, I've surfed all the big waves.
233
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Six Flags, Busch Gardens.
234
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Even tore up Tivoli World.
235
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That's in Malaga, Spain.
236
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Yeah, bro. I told you he was the man.
237
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Hey, man, come on now, you little...
238
00:12:50,736 --> 00:12:52,169
Just tell us when it's safe.
239
00:12:55,574 --> 00:12:58,566
Hey, brahs, check out this hodad.
240
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What are you lookin' for, brah?
241
00:13:00,379 --> 00:13:01,812
I'm talkin' about them little kids, man.
242
00:13:02,014 --> 00:13:03,948
You got to let them little kids ride, man.
243
00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:05,606
I'm talking one surfer to another, man.
244
00:13:05,818 --> 00:13:08,184
Well, if you're really a surfer like you say you are,
245
00:13:08,320 --> 00:13:10,015
then you'll do your talking on the wave.
246
00:13:10,156 --> 00:13:13,057
That's the only language I comprende.
247
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Comprende?
248
00:13:21,433 --> 00:13:22,627
Check it out, Harkey.
249
00:13:22,768 --> 00:13:23,962
You order a picnic table?
250
00:13:25,538 --> 00:13:26,732
This old dude's confused.
251
00:13:26,872 --> 00:13:28,271
Your shorts should be long,
252
00:13:28,407 --> 00:13:29,965
and your board should be short.
253
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You got it backwards, broham.
254
00:13:36,448 --> 00:13:38,211
Do you have a shorter board, Mr. Boomhauer?
255
00:13:38,350 --> 00:13:39,783
Hey, man, it's like I said,
256
00:13:39,919 --> 00:13:41,580
them dang ol' surfin's surfin, man.
257
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You show' em how we do it in Arlen, Mr. Boomhauer!
258
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Fog!
259
00:13:57,603 --> 00:13:59,002
Crumbeater!
260
00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:01,939
Loser!
261
00:14:02,107 --> 00:14:05,270
Ugh. Do they have air conditioning at the library?
262
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:14,577
Use it or lose it, old friend.
263
00:14:14,753 --> 00:14:16,721
You losed it.
264
00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:47,550
So, just the two of us today, huh, Hank?
265
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:49,381
Yup.
266
00:14:49,555 --> 00:14:50,886
Huh.
267
00:14:51,023 --> 00:14:54,481
So, it's just, uh, me and you, then.
268
00:14:54,627 --> 00:14:56,595
Just two men drinking together.
269
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:58,560
Not in a group.
270
00:15:02,501 --> 00:15:04,662
Uh, I'm gonna go check on Bill.
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00:15:04,837 --> 00:15:05,997
Yes, go get Bill.
272
00:15:06,138 --> 00:15:07,366
Great idea.
273
00:15:07,506 --> 00:15:09,565
Bill?
274
00:15:09,708 --> 00:15:11,835
It's Hank.
275
00:15:12,011 --> 00:15:14,707
Uh, just wanted to stop by and see how you're doing.
276
00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:16,074
Oh,
277
00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:17,545
I'm feeling much better.
278
00:15:19,151 --> 00:15:20,243
B-a-ah!
279
00:15:22,488 --> 00:15:24,251
I'm getting back on the road, Hank.
280
00:15:24,423 --> 00:15:25,822
Absolutely not.
281
00:15:25,991 --> 00:15:26,923
But I'm The Heat-Waver.
282
00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:28,184
The heat...
283
00:15:30,663 --> 00:15:31,994
You're not leaving this home.
284
00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:38,236
Oh. Oh, the burns!
285
00:15:38,370 --> 00:15:40,463
My skin hurts!
286
00:15:41,807 --> 00:15:43,069
Okay, okay.
287
00:15:43,208 --> 00:15:44,835
I won't get back out there today.
288
00:15:44,977 --> 00:15:47,070
But you got to do something for me, Hank.
289
00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:47,905
What?
290
00:15:48,147 --> 00:15:49,375
Be my arms.
291
00:15:49,581 --> 00:15:51,071
Wave for me, Hank.
292
00:15:51,250 --> 00:15:52,717
Wave to everyone,
293
00:15:52,885 --> 00:15:55,217
especially the old people and children.
294
00:15:55,387 --> 00:15:57,150
Wave to the children, Hank.
295
00:15:57,289 --> 00:15:59,951
And only give the thumbs up to truckers.
296
00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:01,820
You'll do that for me, won't you, Hank?
297
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,258
No.
298
00:16:03,429 --> 00:16:06,592
Then I have nothing more to say to you.
299
00:16:06,732 --> 00:16:09,633
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
300
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,628
Just please
301
00:16:13,772 --> 00:16:15,467
do it now.
302
00:16:15,607 --> 00:16:17,472
The Department of Water and Power requested
303
00:16:17,609 --> 00:16:20,339
everyone conserve energy until 6:00 p.m.
304
00:16:20,512 --> 00:16:23,379
But your father had to show off and counter with 7:00.
305
00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,491
Hey, Bobby, how was the surf today?
306
00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:39,130
Did Boomhauer do his famous Flamingo?
307
00:16:39,298 --> 00:16:41,528
That's when he stands on one leg.
308
00:16:41,700 --> 00:16:43,861
That's not easy to do even on the ground.
309
00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:46,369
No. All he did was fall flat on his face
310
00:16:46,538 --> 00:16:48,301
and embarrass himself.
311
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:50,374
And us by association.
312
00:16:50,509 --> 00:16:52,443
We didn't even get to ride the wave!
313
00:16:52,611 --> 00:16:53,543
Boomhauer was embarrassed?
314
00:16:55,447 --> 00:16:57,438
I don't know what the heck's going on here,
315
00:16:57,649 --> 00:16:59,446
but someone needs to get their asses kicked.
316
00:16:59,585 --> 00:17:01,246
Finally. Yes!
317
00:17:01,387 --> 00:17:02,649
Thank you.
318
00:17:02,788 --> 00:17:04,847
It's time to kick their local asses!
319
00:17:04,990 --> 00:17:06,423
Bobby, language.
320
00:17:06,558 --> 00:17:10,927
But, yes, I am going to kick their asses.
321
00:18:05,050 --> 00:18:07,280
Hey, man, that's a dang ol' good set, eh?
322
00:18:07,419 --> 00:18:08,477
Yeah, brah.
323
00:18:08,654 --> 00:18:09,780
You paddlin' out?
324
00:18:09,955 --> 00:18:11,217
No, man, you know.
325
00:18:11,390 --> 00:18:13,551
Just like... like a dang ol' dog, man.
326
00:18:13,692 --> 00:18:15,751
Can't no pick up them new tricks, man.
327
00:18:15,894 --> 00:18:17,623
Shah, brah. It's a new wave, man.
328
00:18:17,796 --> 00:18:19,423
You know, can't... can't ol' beat it, man.
329
00:18:19,598 --> 00:18:20,724
Yeah.
330
00:18:20,866 --> 00:18:22,527
Can't beat the wave, brah.
331
00:18:22,668 --> 00:18:23,862
Beat the surfer.
332
00:18:24,036 --> 00:18:26,436
Beat the surfer?
333
00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:40,484
Aah, ooh, ow!
334
00:18:40,652 --> 00:18:42,517
Phew! Another hot one today.
335
00:18:42,654 --> 00:18:44,053
Too hot for me,
336
00:18:44,256 --> 00:18:45,985
and apparently too hot for the Heat-Waver.
337
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:49,788
It appears that the heat has beaten the Heat-Waver.
338
00:18:49,928 --> 00:18:51,691
This Heat-Waver has stuck a knife
339
00:18:51,864 --> 00:18:53,229
into the hope of the commuters
340
00:18:53,365 --> 00:18:54,764
of this city and twisted it.
341
00:18:54,900 --> 00:18:56,663
We would have been better off
342
00:18:56,835 --> 00:18:58,427
had he never shown up
343
00:18:58,570 --> 00:19:00,731
with his teasing of cool kindness.
344
00:19:05,511 --> 00:19:07,536
Check this Barney in the Wranglers.
345
00:19:07,746 --> 00:19:09,873
This ain't no rodeo, bro-dad.
346
00:19:10,048 --> 00:19:11,208
Well, it certainly isn't.
347
00:19:11,416 --> 00:19:13,247
At the rodeo, people have talent
348
00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:14,749
and treat each other with respect.
349
00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:16,047
Yeah, respect!
350
00:19:16,221 --> 00:19:18,655
You have to earn respect.
351
00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:20,451
Yeah, you must be Bodie.
352
00:19:20,626 --> 00:19:21,957
And you must be a pud.
353
00:19:22,094 --> 00:19:23,652
Listen, man, if you want to surf...
354
00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:25,091
I didn't come here to surf.
355
00:19:25,297 --> 00:19:27,026
Well, what did you come here to do?
356
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:28,326
To kick your ass.
357
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:32,098
I bail!
358
00:19:34,039 --> 00:19:35,131
Hey, man, I'm gonna...
359
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:36,830
I'm gonna take it from here, man.
360
00:19:39,578 --> 00:19:40,909
No!
361
00:19:41,079 --> 00:19:42,410
No more talking.
362
00:19:42,614 --> 00:19:44,411
No more surfing.
363
00:19:44,616 --> 00:19:48,017
My dad's finally gonna set things right on Coconut Island.
364
00:19:48,153 --> 00:19:51,020
Hey, man... this my time, man.
365
00:19:55,260 --> 00:19:56,284
You can't surf.
366
00:19:56,461 --> 00:19:57,860
You're old.
367
00:19:57,996 --> 00:19:59,759
And you're not gonna surf.
368
00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:02,332
Talkin' 'bout dang ol' beat, beat the surfer, man.
369
00:20:09,074 --> 00:20:10,541
I wouldn't do that, son.
370
00:20:42,007 --> 00:20:44,202
The flamingo! The flamingo!
371
00:20:46,878 --> 00:20:49,676
Aah! Aah! Dang ol'... dang ol' knees, man.
372
00:20:58,523 --> 00:21:01,549
Some amazing news just in from the Slappy Van!
373
00:21:01,727 --> 00:21:03,558
The Heat-Waver is back!
374
00:21:03,729 --> 00:21:05,993
The Heat-Waver is back!
375
00:21:06,164 --> 00:21:09,327
There just might be hope for this town after all.
376
00:21:52,577 --> 00:21:55,045
This ain't no rodeo, bro-dad!
377
00:21:56,305 --> 00:22:56,299
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