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-== [ www.OpenSubtitles.org ] ==-
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Oh, look at Hank Hill concentrate.
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His mind a total blank.
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He is in a state of redneck transcendence.
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Such a shame someone
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with so much discipline not have more ambition.
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Firm, but with a little give.
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Yup, these are medium-rare.
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What if somebody wants theirs well-done?
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We ask them politely, yet firmly to leave.
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With great meat, son, comes great responsibility.
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Dig in, everybody!
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All right!
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Yum! It's about time.
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This is gonna be delicious.
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I only wish I had as many stomachs
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as the animal I'm about to consume.
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I can't tell if I'm starving or not hungry at all.
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Guess we'll see.
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What the?
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Peggy, how's your steak?
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It's... good.
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Not too tough?
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Uh-uh.
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Bill, your steak... how is it?
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Mm-hmm.
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Can I help you?
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Well, I hope so.
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I bought some steaks here yesterday,
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and they weren't very good.
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Maybe you cooked them wrong.
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Uh, you don't know me,
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so I'll pretend I didn't hear that.
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I'm gonna have to ask to talk to the head butcher.
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We don't actually have a butcher anymore.
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Our meat comes pre-wrapped. Ugh!
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Dang it, I just want a good steak.
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You could try our organic line, Mega-Lorganic,
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but I think that's just the same stuff
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with a different label.
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Psst!
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Dude, if you're looking for good meat, I can hook you up.
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Appleseed?
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How do you know my name?
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It's me, Hank.
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Uh, we spent a week together in the woods.
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You lived in my neighbor's house.
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Woods? Neighbors?
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That does sound like me.
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You got to shop at the co-op, Hank.
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All their meat is organic, grass-fed and prime.
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It's on the corner of Route 2 and Vista.
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Co-op, huh?
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All those VWs in the parking lot,
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I just assumed it was a Unitarian church.
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Uh, I'm looking for your meat department.
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Make a left at the goji berries.
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If you reach the spelt, you've gone too far.
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Oh, this better be good steak.
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It's beautiful.
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When you see something you like, let me know.
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I'll cut it as thick as you want.
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Sir, if it wasn't covered in blood, I'd shake your hand.
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I'll take four...
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I'm afraid we can't sell you that.
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What?
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Steve Greene, co-op founder.
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Hank Hill, paying customer.
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You have to be a member to shop here, Hank.
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Really?
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I'm a member of Triple A.
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That doesn't help.
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Are you sure? It's opened up a lot of doors in the past.
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You see, Hank, we're a non-profit.
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All of our members are co-owners,
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and are required to pay a small fee.
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You also have to volunteer here a few hours a month.
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You got me over a barrel, Steve.
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Okay, I'll join.
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Great! I'll get an application.
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But it'll take a few days to process.
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The guy who does that is on a vision quest.
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Appleseed?
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Uh, I need your help.
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I want to get some meat,
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but I don't have the, uh, proper ID.
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Hey, Hank, I got the meat.
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Shh!
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I got some other stuff, too.
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Heirloom tomatoes, organic carrots
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and some hemp toilet paper.
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Are you trying to frame me?
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Well, it cuts good.
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Consistent grain pattern.
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Well, here it goes.
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So? Is it good?
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The suspense is killing me.
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It's the best steak I have ever eaten.
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Peggy, I think we need to say grace again.
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Mmm. These potatoes are great!
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The tot is no longer my favorite kind of tater.
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And this tomato is delicious, too!
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This is a tomato?
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I thought it was a heaven ball.
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You two aren't making any sense.
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Tomatoes don't have any flavor.
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Mmm.
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Hank, if this is food, what have we been eating?
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Welcome back, Hank.
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Appleseed needs a hand in back.
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Our other stock person didn't show up.
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He flaked.
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Well, I usually reserve this compliment for my wife,
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but this food is downright handsome.
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All these berries need to go out to the produce section.
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Guess we should get to work.
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You're only taking one pint at a time?
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Right.
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I've got two hands, don't I?
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We should stack the boxes on that hand truck.
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That way, it'll only take a couple trips,
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and one of us could be doing that
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while the other one can stack the display.
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Hank, I think you might be... the one.
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Well, that's the last of them.
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What on earth is Sunshine doing?
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An interpretive dance
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to entertain people waiting in line.
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Uh,
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you know, if you want people to get through the line faster,
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we could open up a second register.
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Wow!
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Can anyone here operate a hydraulic power loader?
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Uh, oh.
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Am I really the only one?
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We need to pick up some produce from our farm.
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Don't take any steep hills.
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The truck runs on vegetable oil.
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Ah... manure.
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You're from the co-op?
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Yes, sir. Hank Hill.
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So this is where my dinner came from.
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These animals live better than most people I know.
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Yep. See, the steaks you buy at a grocery store
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come from penned-up steer.
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Th-They feed 'em antibiotics and little bits of other cows
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and that makes them unhappy.
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Well, it'd make me unhappy.
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And it makes them taste terrible.
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Boy, it sure does.
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Our steer get to roam around in the sunshine.
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They drink fresh water from that stream over there.
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Trust me, the happier the steer, the better they taste.
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They all look delicious.
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You sure have been spending a lot of time
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with your new hippie friends, Hank.
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Tell me, are you wearing tie-dye underwear?
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Are you wearing any underwear at all?
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Guys, I am not now, nor will I ever be, a hippie.
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I don't trust hippies.
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They talk about free love,
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but when it comes time to get down to business,
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they've always got an excuse.
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Okay, that's enough.
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The people at the co-op are okay.
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Sure, they dress a little funny and...
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the puns about food get a little tiring:
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Peanut better, fakin' bacon, turkey burger...
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but they sell good food.
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Leave 'em alone.
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So... do they start every day with a drum circle?
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I don't want to talk about it.
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And that's how you rotate stock.
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Steve, something's wrong.
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What is it? Are you having flashbacks?
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Because I am real.
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It's the register.
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I think it's broken.
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Seems fine to me.
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But, look,
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it's got all that extra money in there.
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That doesn't make sense.
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We already paid all the suppliers.
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Well, then, I guess that "extra money" is profit.
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Pr-Profit?!
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No. I touched it.
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What?
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I don't understand the problem here.
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Hank, we're a non-profit.
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We need to sort this out.
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Appleseed, lock the doors.
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We've never made money before.
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What do we do?
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I got it. Let's break all the windows in the store.
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We'll need to use the profit to fix them.
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Problem solved, man.
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No, wait.
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What are you doing?
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Being part of the solution.
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She's right.
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I've seen what money does to people.
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Pretty soon we'll all be flying around in helicopters
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and getting $30 haircuts.
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Guys, profit doesn't have to be a bad thing.
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You don't have to use the money to improve your lives.
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We can use it to improve the store.
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How's that?
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Well, most of our carts have broken wheels.
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We could fix them.
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And maybe we could get a better sign...
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something people can see from the road.
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Yeah, man, random acts of kindness.
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No, not at all.
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And we could stop charging a membership fee.
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That way, we'll be helping more people get access
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to good food.
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How heavy is your head, Hank?
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You want a burrito from the lunch truck, honey?
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No, thanks, I packed a sandwich.
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Looks fancy.
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You got to go to Hollywood for that sandwich, Hank,
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or does Erik Estrada deliver it for you?
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You've got a phone call.
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Hello?
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Appleseed, I can't come to the co-op right now. I...
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Oh, okay, I'm on my way.
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What's going on?
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I had to take a third of a personal day.
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Check out the guy by the wheat-free pastas.
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Is he shoplifting?
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It's worse than that.
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Look at him
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with his fancy phone and his pleats.
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People like him have been coming in all day.
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So?
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They're ruining the vibe, Hank.
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Yeah, Hank, the vibe's shot to hell.
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Guys, I was at work.
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We opened the door
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and the establishment marched right in.
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We need to get these yuppies out of here.
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What? No.
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That's not how you run a business.
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You can't just sell to people you like.
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His shoes have tassels.
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I don't like them anymore than you do,
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but when I look at that guy, I don't see tassels.
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I see someone who's tired
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of eating industrialized, tasteless meat and produce.
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That's what makes this co-op special.
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How could I be so intolerant?
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Don't loo know, Hank, but you just fixed our vibe.
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Ting!
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This is so cool.
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How do you know when a cow is ripe?
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Do you squeeze it?
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Well, you don't want to do anything to upset them, Bobby.
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Just talk to them.
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To them, our conversation is like tenderizer.
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Oh, since we're here,
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I'm gonna go pick more of those peaches.
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That last batch was so juicy I had to eat over a bucket.
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Then I drank from the bucket and giggled like a schoolgirl.
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Morning, Hank.
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Say good-bye to Victor over there.
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I'm taking him to the slaughterhouse.
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Well, okay, but it's not so much "good-bye"
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as it is "see you later."
269
00:12:50,202 --> 00:12:52,067
Delicious!
270
00:12:52,238 --> 00:12:54,206
Hank, this steak so tender
271
00:12:54,340 --> 00:12:56,274
it's like somebody already chewed it for me.
272
00:12:56,475 --> 00:12:58,409
Here's my indecent proposal.
273
00:12:58,544 --> 00:13:01,104
I spend one night with wrinkly Robert Redford
274
00:13:01,313 --> 00:13:03,577
for one million ears of corn.
275
00:13:03,749 --> 00:13:07,185
I don't like eating corn without corn-holders.
276
00:13:07,386 --> 00:13:10,787
Oh, wait, these are corn-holders.
277
00:13:10,956 --> 00:13:12,583
I've got potato salad.
278
00:13:12,758 --> 00:13:15,249
And I've got a mouth!
279
00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:17,019
Hank, Hank!
280
00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:20,425
Appleseed, what are you doing here?
281
00:13:20,566 --> 00:13:22,193
There's trouble at the co-op.
282
00:13:22,334 --> 00:13:23,824
It's Mega-Lo Mart. They're trying to buy us out.
283
00:13:23,969 --> 00:13:25,561
What?! No!
284
00:13:25,704 --> 00:13:29,697
Wow, he's like a human version of Lassie.
285
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:33,244
They want to buy the store, the farm,
286
00:13:33,412 --> 00:13:34,504
the trucks, everything,
287
00:13:34,680 --> 00:13:36,147
and they want an answer by tomorrow.
288
00:13:36,348 --> 00:13:37,781
Well, we don't want to wait until then.
289
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:39,314
Call them now and say no.
290
00:13:40,619 --> 00:13:42,450
Yeah, uh...
291
00:13:42,621 --> 00:13:45,181
we're, we're thinking we're going to sell, Hank.
292
00:13:45,324 --> 00:13:47,019
What? It's a pretty generous offer
293
00:13:47,159 --> 00:13:49,593
and as co-owners we all get a cut.
294
00:13:49,728 --> 00:13:51,491
I'm going to give my money to good causes...
295
00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:54,189
people who plant trees and set fire to SUVs.
296
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:56,096
But Mega-Lo Mart will ruin this place.
297
00:13:56,268 --> 00:13:57,599
They're not going to take the time
298
00:13:57,736 --> 00:14:00,261
to feed the cows alfalfa if their tummies ache
299
00:14:00,406 --> 00:14:03,773
or sift through the cows' scat for signs of trouble
300
00:14:03,976 --> 00:14:06,809
or massage the steer to keep the flanks supple.
301
00:14:06,979 --> 00:14:08,469
Mega-Lo Mart's too big.
302
00:14:08,647 --> 00:14:10,114
Maybe their size will help.
303
00:14:10,282 --> 00:14:13,945
Like you said, Hank: "More good food for more people."
304
00:14:14,086 --> 00:14:16,452
Well, I want no part of it, and neither does Appleseed.
305
00:14:16,622 --> 00:14:18,613
Right, Appleseed?
306
00:14:18,757 --> 00:14:21,317
I need new shoes, Hank.
307
00:14:21,527 --> 00:14:23,859
I thought we all cared about this place.
308
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:27,359
I guess I'm the only one.
309
00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:35,265
If I believed in karma,
310
00:14:35,407 --> 00:14:37,705
I'd be really worried about you guys.
311
00:14:44,850 --> 00:14:47,284
I can't taste anything.
312
00:14:47,486 --> 00:14:50,478
I feel like I'm eating with a mitten on my tongue.
313
00:14:50,656 --> 00:14:54,319
I guess there are some things even Mrs. Dash can't fix.
314
00:14:54,493 --> 00:14:56,324
Let's just focus
315
00:14:56,495 --> 00:14:58,861
on the task at hand and push through this.
316
00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:00,590
Your father is right.
317
00:15:00,766 --> 00:15:03,792
We will forget what food tastes like soon enough.
318
00:15:03,969 --> 00:15:07,132
Maybe it would help if we ate in front of the TV.
319
00:15:08,641 --> 00:15:10,131
Dad, that guy's back.
320
00:15:10,276 --> 00:15:11,368
Hank, Hank,
321
00:15:11,610 --> 00:15:13,202
you were right about Mega-Lorganic,
322
00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:14,845
but it's worse than you thought.
323
00:15:15,047 --> 00:15:15,911
What are you talking about?
324
00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:17,514
It's just as industrialized
325
00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:19,310
as the rest of Mega-Lo Mart.
326
00:15:19,485 --> 00:15:21,248
I saw pictures on the Internet of where they keep their cows.
327
00:15:21,387 --> 00:15:23,048
They're like prison cells.
328
00:15:23,188 --> 00:15:24,951
Being a cow isn't a crime.
329
00:15:25,124 --> 00:15:26,557
We've got to talk to Steve.
330
00:15:26,725 --> 00:15:30,183
Uh, Appleseed, I was in the middle of eating my...
331
00:15:30,362 --> 00:15:32,262
Eh, I'll drive.
332
00:15:36,235 --> 00:15:38,726
What have they done to this place?
333
00:15:40,873 --> 00:15:42,670
No, the meat, too?
334
00:15:42,841 --> 00:15:45,810
It doesn't look like it was ever alive.
335
00:15:45,978 --> 00:15:47,411
Steve, we have to do something.
336
00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:49,342
Mega-Lo Mart is ruining this place.
337
00:15:49,515 --> 00:15:50,743
And you should see the conditions
338
00:15:50,916 --> 00:15:52,315
their cows are living in.
339
00:15:52,484 --> 00:15:54,679
Look, it's not the way I'd run things,
340
00:15:54,820 --> 00:15:56,344
but it's still technically organic.
341
00:15:56,522 --> 00:15:58,888
Well, it might be organic, but it's awful.
342
00:15:59,024 --> 00:16:00,719
How does Sal feel about this?
343
00:16:00,859 --> 00:16:02,724
Uh, we don't have a butcher anymore.
344
00:16:02,861 --> 00:16:04,488
Sal took his profits and bought a condo
345
00:16:04,663 --> 00:16:05,925
on a cruise ship you can live on.
346
00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:10,630
How cute, my new phone reminded me
347
00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:12,566
I have a dentist appointment.
348
00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:15,105
Thank you, phone.
349
00:16:15,274 --> 00:16:16,901
We can't stand for this.
350
00:16:17,076 --> 00:16:18,168
You're right.
351
00:16:18,344 --> 00:16:20,005
We should make signs and protest
352
00:16:20,179 --> 00:16:21,578
and ask people to sign a petition.
353
00:16:21,747 --> 00:16:23,305
No, Appleseed.
354
00:16:23,515 --> 00:16:25,244
We're gonna do something that makes a difference.
355
00:16:31,190 --> 00:16:32,987
I'll get the cattle and put them in the trailer.
356
00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:35,353
Should I steal the plants?
357
00:16:35,494 --> 00:16:36,461
We're not stealing.
358
00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:38,391
We're co-owners of this farm
359
00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:41,260
and we're not taking any profits from this sale.
360
00:16:41,433 --> 00:16:43,833
We're just taking what's ours, our fair share.
361
00:16:43,969 --> 00:16:46,904
Then why are we doing it at night?
362
00:16:47,072 --> 00:16:49,131
And why did you drive with your headlights off?
363
00:16:49,308 --> 00:16:51,037
Just go grab a couple chickens.
364
00:16:51,210 --> 00:16:53,144
Right.
365
00:16:53,312 --> 00:16:54,301
It's okay.
366
00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:55,913
It's me, Hank.
367
00:17:09,895 --> 00:17:11,294
Aggh! Hank!
368
00:17:13,832 --> 00:17:16,300
Cows! Thank you, Dad!
369
00:17:16,435 --> 00:17:18,665
Can I draw the meat parts on them with a Sharpie?
370
00:17:18,804 --> 00:17:20,294
Hank, are you crazy?
371
00:17:20,439 --> 00:17:22,930
We cannot have livestock in our backyard.
372
00:17:23,075 --> 00:17:24,406
I'm not even sure it's legal.
373
00:17:24,576 --> 00:17:26,339
We can't possibly be zoned for this.
374
00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:30,147
I don't care, Peggy.
375
00:17:30,282 --> 00:17:32,216
I'll turn the shed into a chicken coop
376
00:17:32,351 --> 00:17:34,148
and use the garage as a barn.
377
00:17:34,286 --> 00:17:36,379
If we give the cows some private time,
378
00:17:36,555 --> 00:17:37,920
soon we should have a hundred head.
379
00:17:38,090 --> 00:17:39,455
Hundred head?
380
00:17:39,591 --> 00:17:41,183
We barely have enough room back here
381
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:43,157
for a proper game of badminton, Hank.
382
00:17:43,328 --> 00:17:44,920
Well, we'll have to knock down the fence
383
00:17:45,097 --> 00:17:47,190
to Dale's yard so they can graze.
384
00:17:47,366 --> 00:17:49,800
And we'll need to find a butcher who can keep a secret.
385
00:17:49,968 --> 00:17:51,265
You've lost your mind.
386
00:17:51,403 --> 00:17:53,633
Maybe we can keep a chicken. Maybe.
387
00:17:53,806 --> 00:17:55,205
Come on, Peggy, please?
388
00:17:55,374 --> 00:17:57,308
I'll let you name them.
389
00:17:57,443 --> 00:17:59,377
You've got all those great names you've been waiting to use.
390
00:18:01,246 --> 00:18:03,237
Okay, let's give it a try.
391
00:18:09,488 --> 00:18:11,854
Guys, stop trying to tip my cow.
392
00:18:11,990 --> 00:18:13,958
Your mission is futile, Hank Hill.
393
00:18:14,159 --> 00:18:16,684
Even if you block view, I still have better house,
394
00:18:16,862 --> 00:18:18,762
a better car, better wife.
395
00:18:18,897 --> 00:18:20,626
Oh, face it: I just better.
396
00:18:22,501 --> 00:18:23,627
What the heck was that?
397
00:18:23,802 --> 00:18:24,700
You got a cow?
398
00:18:24,837 --> 00:18:26,464
Uh, a cow?
399
00:18:26,638 --> 00:18:29,004
Why would I have a cow in my backyard, Kahn?
400
00:18:29,141 --> 00:18:30,540
I don't know.
401
00:18:30,676 --> 00:18:32,268
Why does Bill use T-shirt as car seat cover?
402
00:18:32,444 --> 00:18:34,309
Why do rednecks do anything?
403
00:18:36,148 --> 00:18:37,376
Sure smell like cow.
404
00:18:37,516 --> 00:18:39,245
Yes, well, you see, that's, uh...
405
00:18:39,384 --> 00:18:42,547
Oh, that's me! I smell like cow.
406
00:18:42,754 --> 00:18:46,121
Okay, yeah, I guess you do.
407
00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:51,493
That's right, yeah, 200 pounds of cattle feed.
408
00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:53,791
Y-yes, that's the correct address.
409
00:18:53,932 --> 00:18:55,524
It's a residence.
410
00:18:55,667 --> 00:18:57,999
Are you selling feed or are you asking questions?
411
00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:00,071
Tomorrow morning, we find out
412
00:19:00,239 --> 00:19:04,175
if a Martha tastes different from a Mrs. Peckingham.
413
00:19:06,078 --> 00:19:08,342
Cows! I knew it!
414
00:19:08,514 --> 00:19:10,539
Oh, Lord.
415
00:19:14,453 --> 00:19:16,421
Look what these cows did to my yard!
416
00:19:16,588 --> 00:19:17,748
I'll fix it, Kahn.
417
00:19:17,956 --> 00:19:19,389
I'll take care of everything.
418
00:19:20,926 --> 00:19:22,359
You got chickens too?
419
00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:23,518
I reporting you!
420
00:19:23,695 --> 00:19:24,992
No, wait!
421
00:19:25,130 --> 00:19:27,690
Do you like good meat, Kahn?
422
00:19:27,866 --> 00:19:29,299
You trying to buy me off, Hank Hill?
423
00:19:29,468 --> 00:19:32,460
No way. I'm calling cops.
424
00:19:32,604 --> 00:19:33,696
Well, you go ahead.
425
00:19:33,872 --> 00:19:34,930
I've got nothing to fear!
426
00:19:35,107 --> 00:19:36,506
I've done nothing wrong!
427
00:19:40,379 --> 00:19:42,347
Appleseed, get over here quick.
428
00:19:46,351 --> 00:19:47,613
Kahn called the police.
429
00:19:47,786 --> 00:19:49,185
They'll be here soon.
430
00:19:49,421 --> 00:19:50,615
You've got to get these cattle out of here.
431
00:19:50,822 --> 00:19:52,221
But where should I go?
432
00:19:52,424 --> 00:19:54,517
Someplace where no one will find you.
433
00:19:54,693 --> 00:19:56,593
Find a field where they can graze.
434
00:19:56,728 --> 00:19:58,696
Find a stream where they can drink.
435
00:19:58,897 --> 00:20:01,730
It's the only way to keep our dream alive.
436
00:20:01,900 --> 00:20:04,130
Go, and write me when you think it's safe.
437
00:20:04,303 --> 00:20:06,669
I... I'm scared, Hank.
438
00:20:06,805 --> 00:20:08,136
There's no time to waste.
439
00:20:08,307 --> 00:20:09,706
Go on, now. Get!
440
00:20:16,248 --> 00:20:18,478
Run, Appleseed, run!
441
00:20:45,644 --> 00:20:47,839
Well, at least our tomato crop has started to come in.
442
00:20:48,013 --> 00:20:49,708
Yeah, that's something.
443
00:21:13,138 --> 00:21:15,800
Delicious.
444
00:21:53,078 --> 00:21:55,239
It's the best steak I have ever eaten.
445
00:21:56,305 --> 00:22:56,299
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