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Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
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I am not looking forward to work today.
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Joe Jack is on some kind of crazy diet
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and he keeps asking me how his jeans are fitting.
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Hello, office slaves.
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Hello.
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My boss is letting me telecommute.
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You know what that word means, stupid hillbillies?
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It's English for "work from home."
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Look at me, in bathrobe, already dressed for work.
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Well, that's asinine.
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Work and home were intended to be enjoyed separately.
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I see from your face that you are see thing with jealousy.
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Well, so long, slaves.
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So long.
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Y Venezuela tiene la pelota al centrocampo.
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Oh! Pass it to Hernandez.
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Aah! What are you doing?!
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Pass it to Hernandez!
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The only part of soccer I like
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is when the announcer yells "Goal."
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Well, then, you're going to love this announcer.
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He used to make his living blowing up bounce houses.
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I will bet you he'll go 15 seconds.
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15 seconds?!
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That's crazy.
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I'll take that bet.
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What are we betting for?
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Hmm.
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Bragging rights.
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What are bragging rights?
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Bragging rights is the sanctioned ability
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to gloat insufferably,
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usually for a prescribed period of time.
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Gomez pasa la pelota a Hernandez.
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¡Qué golazo!
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Gooooooal!
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Seven seconds.
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I win.
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I... am the champion!
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I do believe I will exercise my rights now.
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Oh, oh, you know, I hurt my foot brag dancing.
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I think I need some Dr.
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Schoooooll's!
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And David in the I.T. Department
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is a big-time dumbo.
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Oh, big-time.
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If you have nothing else to do,
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than tell me how co-workers should do their jobs,
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maybe you can help me clean.
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My daddy is coming today.
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I thought the General wasn't coming until end of the week.
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He took control of homeowner's association
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earlier than planned.
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It was Daddy's first bloodless coup.
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He's really mellowing out.
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I hope so.
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He treats me so bad, Minh, and in my own house.
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Oh, he doesn't mean anything by it.
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It's just his way.
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Besides, he cosigned our loan,
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so kind of his house, too.
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I know.
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Ah!
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So is it true Minh's dad used to work for a dictator?
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Several dictators, and then he worked for Pac Bell.
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There's the General's taxi.
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Do I look okay?
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D-Don't loiter here.
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Go home.
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Eat some butter.
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Welcome, General.
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I forgot how handsome you are.
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Stand down, descendant of fishermen.
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Fishermen! MINH: Daddy!
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Oh, sa baldee, djai hin!
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This is for you.
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So sweet.
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I'll put right next to elephant dressed as ninja.
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So... you're good with computers?
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Yes. Then put MP3s in my watch!
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I want talk radio and Frank Sinatra!
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Well, that's not how it work...
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Do it! Drag and drop!
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But l... Drag and drop!
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This watch isn't even digital!
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You should have married Phoukong Vivarad.
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He was VP of Acquisitions at Ingersoll Rand.
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Now he's Senior VP.
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Daddy, you like teasing Kahn too much.
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All I'm saying is you and Connie
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would have been better off if you married Phoukong.
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Uh...
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I wouldn't exist if she married Phoukong.
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Is that what your dad told you?
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Kahn!
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You have to help me.
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You got any Red Rooster Sauce for General?
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I forgot to buy some and now he's on a rampage.
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Uh, I'm not sure what you're asking me for.
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Hot sauce! Now!
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I have this weird feeling.
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I think it's sympathy for Kahn.
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Yeah. Know what you mean.
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Mm-hmm.
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Who wants a beer?
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Me. Sounds good. Yeah, man.
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Okay, General, got it.
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I'm not a man.
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Uh, but do you want spicy, extra-spicy,
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or one where rooster look really mad?
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Hello?
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Is the bar next door any good?
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Oh, hot danger... I'm not messing with that guy.
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Ted, that was so amazing!
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Sometimes I wish guys could have,
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like, a friendship marriage.
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I did not know you liked karaoke, Kahn.
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Oh, anything to get away from my father-in-law.
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It's terrible at home, Ted.
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Anyone ever make you feel like you're less of a man?
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Feel?
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Kahn, the wonderful thing about karaoke
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is it's an emotional outlet
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but it still allows us to maintain proper distance.
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Please,
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save it for the stage.
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It's cathartic.
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Trust me.
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Uh...
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number 128, I guess.
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Encore! Encore!
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Encore!
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Encore! Encore!
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No.
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No, sorry, got to go see father-in-law.
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Encore!
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Encore!
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Ah, forget him.
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Who wants more Kahn?
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Hello, happy family.
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Where are my condiments?!
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Sorry, General, it's in everybody's Bloody Marys.
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Ah!
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I was a big hit at the karaoke bar in Little Laos.
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The crowd loved me.
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They even took my picture and put it on the "W all of Fame."
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Wow, Dad!
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That's so cool!
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Yeah!
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Kind of reminds me of the rebel with shiny shirt and pompadour
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I met at disco in Laos.
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Don't be so happy with yourself.
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You're just singing someone else's songs.
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No skill involved.
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Unlike poetry.
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I shall now recite a poem I wrote
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while awaiting trial at The Hague.
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So much depends
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upon inhumanity...
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and death.
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We must not forget
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yet we cannot remember.
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Death be not proud?
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Then who?
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So, after you finished your song,
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did you smash your air guitar?
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I'm sorry, Connie,
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we must respect our elders and listen to his poem.
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Please, General, continue.
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I'll tell you later how I jump into the crowd.
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That's the way I'd do it.
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You'd save a load on a casket,
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though the cannon might be expensive.
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Hello, Hank Hill.
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I accidentally got some of your mail.
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Hey, I've been waiting for Snap-On
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to send me their catalog for years.
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Yeah, I know.
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I've been getting your catalog for years.
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I usually throw it out,
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but today I thought, "What the heck?"
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What has gotten into you, Kahn?
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Ever since I started doing karaoke,
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nothing bothers me anymore.
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Not the General, not you guys, nothing.
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Hey, you guys want to come watch me sing?
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I'll put you on my guest list.
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I'm on a list!
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Huh, Kahn must be really good at this.
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I've never seen so many people happy to see him before.
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I've heard five people refer to Kahn as:
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"The 'Morning After' guy."
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Yeah, he's really popular here.
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He is popular with losers.
196
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That make him number one loser.
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00:10:45,878 --> 00:10:48,108
Steve, good Elvis.
198
00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:51,272
Oh, John, your Spandau Ballet makes me cry.
199
00:10:51,450 --> 00:10:54,510
Bob, your Freddie Mercury is getting much, much better.
200
00:10:56,088 --> 00:10:57,749
Natasha, you got that wrong.
201
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"Every step you take I'll be watching... you."
202
00:11:01,027 --> 00:11:03,587
And again, people, if you order the Buffalo wings
203
00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:06,163
please wash your hands before touching the song book.
204
00:11:06,298 --> 00:11:08,323
Hey, emcee guy,
205
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turn off words.
206
00:11:10,636 --> 00:11:12,570
I sing without net tonight.
207
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Oh-ho-ho-ho!
208
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I see you a truly beautiful crowd.
209
00:11:36,495 --> 00:11:38,929
Hey, Kahn.
210
00:11:39,065 --> 00:11:42,728
Minh, this is my coworker David that I talk about all the time.
211
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Dumbo.
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00:11:44,270 --> 00:11:46,295
Nice guy, though.
213
00:11:46,505 --> 00:11:48,735
We actually came out tonight to make fun of you,
214
00:11:48,908 --> 00:11:50,842
but man... you're awesome.
215
00:11:52,478 --> 00:11:53,911
Hope to see you back at work sometime.
216
00:11:54,046 --> 00:11:55,775
They should stop forcing you to telecommute.
217
00:11:55,948 --> 00:11:56,972
I'm being forced?!
218
00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:05,418
It's all good, it's all good.
219
00:12:05,591 --> 00:12:08,025
Kahn's attitude has really changed, Peggy.
220
00:12:08,194 --> 00:12:10,162
He's actually... tolerable.
221
00:12:10,296 --> 00:12:12,127
Eh, it will not last.
222
00:12:12,264 --> 00:12:14,494
Sure, Kahn is nice when he's successful,
223
00:12:14,700 --> 00:12:16,668
but he's a jerk when he fails;
224
00:12:16,802 --> 00:12:19,635
and, deep down, he thinks he's a failure.
225
00:12:19,772 --> 00:12:21,865
Kahn will be a jerk again within the week.
226
00:12:22,041 --> 00:12:25,033
Care to put a little wager on that?
227
00:12:25,211 --> 00:12:26,769
Now hold on.
228
00:12:26,946 --> 00:12:28,914
You can't bet on a human being like that.
229
00:12:29,048 --> 00:12:30,310
Even if it is Kahn.
230
00:12:30,449 --> 00:12:31,973
Oh, Hank,
231
00:12:32,151 --> 00:12:33,743
this is what mother-son bonding looks like now.
232
00:12:33,886 --> 00:12:35,751
How 'bout we up the ante?
233
00:12:35,888 --> 00:12:38,186
Winner gets reverse bragging rights.
234
00:12:38,324 --> 00:12:39,882
I don't know what that means
235
00:12:40,059 --> 00:12:41,287
but I'm in.
236
00:12:41,460 --> 00:12:42,859
It means the loser...
237
00:12:43,028 --> 00:12:44,222
you...
238
00:12:44,363 --> 00:12:46,297
has to lavish the winner... me...
239
00:12:46,465 --> 00:12:47,432
with praise.
240
00:12:47,566 --> 00:12:48,498
Deal.
241
00:12:48,701 --> 00:12:50,225
And when I win,
242
00:12:50,402 --> 00:12:52,199
I would like you to refer to me
243
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as "The Boy King."
244
00:12:58,144 --> 00:12:59,839
Kahn,
245
00:13:00,012 --> 00:13:03,038
you were unbelievable last night!
246
00:13:03,215 --> 00:13:05,342
You made the hairs on my back stand on end.
247
00:13:05,484 --> 00:13:06,678
Well, if you liked that,
248
00:13:06,852 --> 00:13:08,217
you should come see me at karaoke night
249
00:13:08,354 --> 00:13:09,753
at Nine Rivers Country Club.
250
00:13:09,889 --> 00:13:11,550
They asked me to perform at their fund-raiser,
251
00:13:11,724 --> 00:13:13,419
to help pay for last fund-raiser.
252
00:13:13,559 --> 00:13:15,083
Check it out... I'm headlining!
253
00:13:15,261 --> 00:13:17,593
Wow.
254
00:13:17,763 --> 00:13:19,492
And look at that, you got top billing
255
00:13:19,665 --> 00:13:20,927
over Dith Prou Non!
256
00:13:21,100 --> 00:13:22,567
Yes!
257
00:13:22,768 --> 00:13:24,258
This is going to be really big show for me.
258
00:13:24,436 --> 00:13:26,131
Even General's coming.
259
00:13:26,338 --> 00:13:27,771
And Minh says he won't wait in the car this time.
260
00:13:27,907 --> 00:13:29,306
Well, good for you, Kahn.
261
00:13:29,441 --> 00:13:30,840
We're all looking forward to it.
262
00:13:31,010 --> 00:13:33,945
Kahn, I need you to come and wash my clothes.
263
00:13:34,079 --> 00:13:36,547
They have taken on the smell of your house.
264
00:13:36,682 --> 00:13:38,445
I'm sorry, General,
265
00:13:38,617 --> 00:13:40,448
but I am talking with my friends now.
266
00:13:40,586 --> 00:13:42,451
Why don't you do it yourself?
267
00:13:44,390 --> 00:13:45,914
Oh...
268
00:13:50,763 --> 00:13:52,856
Aah!
269
00:13:52,998 --> 00:13:54,863
Well, all right, Kahn!
270
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,297
Join us for a beer.
271
00:14:01,473 --> 00:14:04,408
I have four recording devices taped to my person
272
00:14:04,610 --> 00:14:07,636
for bootlegging Kahn's performance.
273
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:09,371
I'm going to make a killing
274
00:14:09,515 --> 00:14:11,710
down at the Laotian Farmer's Market.
275
00:14:11,884 --> 00:14:14,717
Kahn, you perform with such power.
276
00:14:14,887 --> 00:14:17,253
Please tell us about your "karaoke strategy."
277
00:14:17,389 --> 00:14:19,550
In karaoke, you must dominate your song.
278
00:14:19,725 --> 00:14:20,783
You must... Kahn!
279
00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:22,791
I would like to perform.
280
00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:24,657
But we already have a program!
281
00:14:24,830 --> 00:14:26,593
And an approximate time frame!
282
00:14:26,799 --> 00:14:28,130
No, no,
283
00:14:28,267 --> 00:14:29,894
it's fine, Mitchell.
284
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:32,503
How about this... I won't do an encore,
285
00:14:32,671 --> 00:14:34,002
and General can open for me.
286
00:14:38,277 --> 00:14:41,838
"I am boss! I am boss!"
287
00:14:50,422 --> 00:14:52,049
Wait, isn't this?
288
00:14:54,393 --> 00:14:57,487
There's got to be a morning after!
289
00:14:57,630 --> 00:14:59,996
No! That's Kahn's song!
290
00:15:00,132 --> 00:15:01,793
He's stealing Kahn's song!
291
00:15:01,934 --> 00:15:03,663
In the world of karaoke,
292
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:06,701
stealing a man's song is like sleeping with his wife
293
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:09,875
and making him listen to it as others watch and cheer.
294
00:15:10,075 --> 00:15:14,068
Let's keep on looking for the light!
295
00:15:14,213 --> 00:15:18,377
Why don't we cross the bridge together
296
00:15:18,550 --> 00:15:23,419
And find a place that's safe and warm?
297
00:15:26,725 --> 00:15:28,955
Wow, Kahn,
298
00:15:29,094 --> 00:15:31,528
the gauntlet's been thrown down!
299
00:15:31,664 --> 00:15:34,064
And now, for our headlining performer!
300
00:15:34,233 --> 00:15:35,359
Kahn
301
00:15:35,501 --> 00:15:37,867
Souphanousinphone.
302
00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:58,522
I can't believe General stole my song.
303
00:15:58,657 --> 00:16:00,090
The monster!
304
00:16:00,259 --> 00:16:02,955
The worst part is, I let him.
305
00:16:03,095 --> 00:16:05,757
I could've gone up on stage and beat him, but I didn't.
306
00:16:05,931 --> 00:16:07,125
I'm worthless.
307
00:16:07,299 --> 00:16:08,732
Amazing.
308
00:16:08,934 --> 00:16:11,198
The General was able to use Maureen McGovern
309
00:16:11,370 --> 00:16:13,133
as a device of torture.
310
00:16:13,339 --> 00:16:14,306
He's just a jackass.
311
00:16:14,473 --> 00:16:15,872
Forget about him.
312
00:16:16,008 --> 00:16:17,669
Besides, he's not gonna be here forever.
313
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:19,675
Yeah, he'll eventually go home.
314
00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:21,370
But I'll still be a failure.
315
00:16:21,513 --> 00:16:22,571
No, you won't.
316
00:16:22,715 --> 00:16:23,909
You'll get back onstage
317
00:16:24,049 --> 00:16:26,449
and walk this off like an athlete...
318
00:16:26,618 --> 00:16:28,882
that sings.
319
00:16:29,054 --> 00:16:30,544
Kahn!
320
00:16:30,689 --> 00:16:33,089
I gotta run.
321
00:16:33,258 --> 00:16:37,024
We're witnessing our own VH-1 Behind The Music.
322
00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,426
It's just a show until it happens to you.
323
00:16:39,565 --> 00:16:40,930
Dang it.
324
00:16:41,100 --> 00:16:42,761
We gotta do something.
325
00:16:46,438 --> 00:16:48,963
I am testing the microphone.
326
00:16:49,174 --> 00:16:51,506
I am testing the microphone.
327
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:57,440
Hey, Kahn!
328
00:16:57,616 --> 00:16:58,947
Boomhauer
329
00:16:59,084 --> 00:17:00,813
had this thing lying around his bedroom.
330
00:17:00,986 --> 00:17:02,010
Come take a look.
331
00:17:03,956 --> 00:17:06,652
Please, Kahn, you've got a rainbow in your mouth.
332
00:17:06,792 --> 00:17:08,157
Open it for the world!
333
00:17:15,768 --> 00:17:18,498
Okay, Mom, you only have one more day
334
00:17:18,670 --> 00:17:21,230
for Kahn to turn back into his old self again.
335
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:24,238
Oh, he may look like a broken man right now,
336
00:17:24,410 --> 00:17:26,776
but that's the final stage before jerk-dom.
337
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:32,812
And when I win,
338
00:17:32,985 --> 00:17:34,816
just know I like compliments
339
00:17:34,987 --> 00:17:37,649
that are from the neck up.
340
00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:57,531
Kahn, you meditating again?
341
00:17:59,344 --> 00:18:00,242
Aw...
342
00:18:00,379 --> 00:18:01,311
You want to eat?
343
00:18:01,513 --> 00:18:04,505
Just drop food on my face.
344
00:18:04,683 --> 00:18:06,412
Oh, Kahn,
345
00:18:06,552 --> 00:18:09,453
it's not a big deal that Daddy did the same song.
346
00:18:09,588 --> 00:18:10,850
So what?
347
00:18:11,023 --> 00:18:13,116
Bah, maybe to you, Minh.
348
00:18:13,258 --> 00:18:15,021
But it was my song.
349
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,467
Daddy, Kahn is hurting.
350
00:18:24,670 --> 00:18:25,728
You have to do something!
351
00:18:25,904 --> 00:18:27,462
Ehh!
352
00:18:27,673 --> 00:18:30,107
Do not interrupt me when Geldorf Muller is pulling.
353
00:18:34,580 --> 00:18:38,482
Ah... it's too bad there is not a world's weakest man,
354
00:18:38,617 --> 00:18:41,085
because Kahn would be unstoppable.
355
00:18:42,187 --> 00:18:43,916
He's my husband
356
00:18:44,089 --> 00:18:46,182
and the father to your only granddaughter.
357
00:18:46,358 --> 00:18:48,417
You have to talk to him and make this right.
358
00:18:58,737 --> 00:18:59,635
Please.
359
00:18:59,771 --> 00:19:01,102
Sit up, son.
360
00:19:04,443 --> 00:19:06,570
I know I've been hard on you.
361
00:19:10,482 --> 00:19:12,473
You are a failure.
362
00:19:12,618 --> 00:19:14,518
You are
363
00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:16,587
a loser, a nothing.
364
00:19:16,722 --> 00:19:19,816
I am better than you in every way
365
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:22,756
and can crush you, whenever the mood strikes me.
366
00:19:24,329 --> 00:19:26,160
Now.
367
00:19:26,298 --> 00:19:28,698
If you accept that, because you are Minh's husband,
368
00:19:28,867 --> 00:19:32,064
I will leave here and let you save face
369
00:19:32,237 --> 00:19:35,900
in front of this inconsequential mix of bottom dwellers.
370
00:19:36,141 --> 00:19:38,803
Good enough for me!
371
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:47,675
Kahn,
372
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:52,153
I compliment you on your success in life.
373
00:19:53,725 --> 00:19:55,522
You are married to my daughter.
374
00:19:55,694 --> 00:19:58,458
And you have a child which you share with her.
375
00:19:58,597 --> 00:20:01,930
You have achieved... things.
376
00:20:06,338 --> 00:20:08,499
I am departing by taxi now.
377
00:20:26,858 --> 00:20:28,621
Well, all right, Kahn!
378
00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:30,523
It's nice to see you in a good mood again.
379
00:20:30,696 --> 00:20:31,492
You want a beer?
380
00:20:33,732 --> 00:20:36,394
I would love a beer...
381
00:20:36,568 --> 00:20:39,696
an import from my Sub-Zero style refrigerator,
382
00:20:39,871 --> 00:20:43,136
not domestic swill from hillbilly cooler.
383
00:20:43,275 --> 00:20:45,004
Huh.
384
00:20:45,210 --> 00:20:47,872
Well, looks like we got an extra beer.
385
00:20:48,046 --> 00:20:49,877
Mm... yup.
386
00:20:50,048 --> 00:20:51,037
Yep.
387
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,013
Mm-hmm.
388
00:20:53,185 --> 00:20:56,621
So, what do you think of your sandwich, Bobby?
389
00:20:56,755 --> 00:20:59,417
I have never had a better sandwich.
390
00:20:59,558 --> 00:21:01,526
In all of my life.
391
00:21:01,660 --> 00:21:04,788
It's as if the meat was touched by God.
392
00:21:04,963 --> 00:21:07,124
Oh, yes.
393
00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:09,427
I thought it was gonna be a good sandwich when I was making it.
394
00:21:09,601 --> 00:21:11,330
How do I look?
395
00:21:11,503 --> 00:21:13,562
Your skin is radiant,
396
00:21:13,739 --> 00:21:15,036
and your hair is luxurious.
397
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:16,673
How jealous other boys must be
398
00:21:16,875 --> 00:21:19,776
that I have such a perfect mom.
399
00:21:54,179 --> 00:21:55,441
Drag and drop!
400
00:21:55,681 --> 00:21:57,512
But I... Drag and drop!
401
00:21:58,305 --> 00:22:58,450
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