1 00:00:02,544 --> 00:00:04,171 Geez, I can't believe we found a version of Earth 2 00:00:04,254 --> 00:00:06,507 with a "Ball Fondlers" movie franchise. 3 00:00:06,590 --> 00:00:09,639 I can't believe the things this reality considers PG-13. 4 00:00:09,718 --> 00:00:12,392 - Yeah, l-l'm pretty jealous. - Don't be, Morty. 5 00:00:12,471 --> 00:00:15,315 There's pros and cons to every alternate timeline. 6 00:00:15,390 --> 00:00:16,562 Fun facts about this one -- 7 00:00:16,642 --> 00:00:18,064 It's got giant, telepathic spiders, 8 00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:19,395 11 9/11s, 9 00:00:19,478 --> 00:00:21,480 and the best ice cream in the multiverse! 10 00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:23,156 - Shut up! - Whoa! 11 00:00:23,232 --> 00:00:25,701 We're gonna go get some ice cream, motherfucker! 12 00:00:25,776 --> 00:00:27,653 [engine sputters] 13 00:00:27,736 --> 00:00:29,033 Oh, great. 14 00:00:29,112 --> 00:00:30,785 Oh, boy. W-What's wrong, Rick? 15 00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,457 Is it the quantum carburetor or something? 16 00:00:32,533 --> 00:00:34,535 "Quantum carburetor"? Jesus, Morty. 17 00:00:34,618 --> 00:00:36,541 You can't just add a s[burps]-- sci-fi word 18 00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:38,543 to a car word and hope it means something. 19 00:00:38,622 --> 00:00:41,045 Looks like somethings wrong with the microverse battery. 20 00:00:41,124 --> 00:00:42,671 We're gonna have to go inside. 21 00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:44,298 Um, go inside what? 22 00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:46,176 The battery, Morty. Be right back, Summer. 23 00:00:46,255 --> 00:00:47,677 Stay put, don't touch any buttons, 24 00:00:47,756 --> 00:00:50,680 and ignore all random thoughts that feel... spidery. 25 00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:52,352 Wait! You can't leave me here! 26 00:00:52,427 --> 00:00:53,644 You'll be fine. 27 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:55,222 Ship, keep Summer safe. 28 00:00:55,305 --> 00:00:57,399 FEMALE VOICE: [warbles] Keep Summer safe. 29 00:00:57,474 --> 00:00:59,021 MORTY: Ohh! 30 00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:01,858 Ugh. Wonderful. 31 00:01:06,316 --> 00:01:08,284 Hey, excuse me. Hello. 32 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:10,328 Um... [cellphone clicking] 33 00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,327 What, you think you're better than me?! 34 00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,408 Nobody's better than me! 35 00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:15,663 Hey! Hey! 36 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:21,756 Aah! Aaaaah! 37 00:01:21,832 --> 00:01:23,584 - Keep Summer safe. - Aaaaaaah! 38 00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:24,793 Hey, man, what the hell?! 39 00:01:24,876 --> 00:01:26,594 That was my daughter's pediatrician! Aah! 40 00:01:26,670 --> 00:01:28,388 No, stop! Don't kill him! 41 00:01:28,463 --> 00:01:29,715 [ Beep ] Confirmed. 42 00:01:29,798 --> 00:01:31,266 [grunts] Aah! 43 00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:32,388 [groans] 44 00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:34,140 Oh, god. I can't feel my legs. 45 00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:35,391 Help! Help!! 46 00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:36,722 Summer is safe. 47 00:01:36,805 --> 00:01:38,728 I don't feel safe. [ sobs ] 48 00:01:38,807 --> 00:01:40,150 Confirmed. [ light jazz music plays] 49 00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:42,193 [sobbing] No. [sniffles] 50 00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:43,737 Oh, god, help me. Help me! 51 00:01:43,812 --> 00:01:45,860 [sobbing] Help me, please! You can help me! 52 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:48,818 PI' 53 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:56,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 54 00:02:19,264 --> 00:02:21,062 Oh, man. Where are we, Rick? 55 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:23,189 Morty, remember eight seconds ago when -- you said, 56 00:02:23,268 --> 00:02:25,737 "go inside what?" And I said, "the battery"? 57 00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,405 Then we showed up here, and I wasn't like, 58 00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:28,733 "Whoa, this is unexpected. 59 00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:30,408 This is not what I was expecting, Morty. 60 00:02:30,484 --> 00:02:32,077 What a perplexing mystery this is." 61 00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:33,654 All right, all right, we're inside the battery. 62 00:02:33,737 --> 00:02:35,410 I get it. You don't have to bust my balls. 63 00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,457 Huh, this isn't right. This pipe's supposed to be... 64 00:02:37,532 --> 00:02:40,502 sending 20 terawatts of juice up to the engine, Morty. 65 00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:42,329 [computer beeps] Instead we've got... zero? 66 00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:43,664 Now what are these people doing? 67 00:02:43,747 --> 00:02:45,920 - W-W-W-Whoa, people? - [ groans ] 68 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,626 It's time for some hands-on engine repair. 69 00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:49,302 All right, Morty, hold on to something. 70 00:02:49,378 --> 00:02:50,425 Whoa! 71 00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:54,216 Holy crap! 72 00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:56,222 I thought we were inside your car battery, Rick. 73 00:02:56,301 --> 00:02:58,895 T-T-This is like a whole p-planet or something. 74 00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:00,813 Thanks, Morty. I'm pretty proud of this bad boy. 75 00:03:00,889 --> 00:03:02,357 Check it out. [ keypad beeps ] 76 00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,400 I put a spatially tessellated void 77 00:03:04,476 --> 00:03:06,353 inside a modified temporal field 78 00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:08,609 until a planet developed intelligent life. 79 00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:11,283 I then introduced that life to the wonders of electricity, 80 00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:13,611 which they now generate on a global scale. 81 00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:15,446 And, you know, some of it goes to power my engine 82 00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,122 and charge my phone and stuff. 83 00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,291 You have a whole planet making your power for you? 84 00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:21,460 That's slavery. - It's society. 85 00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:22,878 They work for each other, Morty. 86 00:03:22,953 --> 00:03:24,546 They pay each other. They buy houses. 87 00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:26,043 They get married and make children that replace them 88 00:03:26,123 --> 00:03:27,841 when they get too old to make power. 89 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:30,044 That just sounds like slavery with extra steps. 90 00:03:30,127 --> 00:03:33,051 Ooh la la, someone's gonna get laid in college. 91 00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:35,053 ANCHOR: It appears we are being revisited 92 00:03:35,132 --> 00:03:37,885 by the alien known as Rick, who once gave our world 93 00:03:37,968 --> 00:03:40,266 the gift of gooble box technology, 94 00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:42,518 which, when stomped on, generates electricity, 95 00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:44,691 powering our homes and businesses, 96 00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:46,518 improving our daily lives, while safely removing 97 00:03:46,601 --> 00:03:51,072 the dangerous waste power to a special disposal volcano. 98 00:03:51,148 --> 00:03:52,695 But why has Rick returned? 99 00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:55,368 And what will he say when he hears the big news? 100 00:03:55,444 --> 00:03:56,991 Let's find out. 101 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:59,414 You need to tell these people they're in a battery, Rick. 102 00:03:59,489 --> 00:04:01,742 It's messed up. There's caterers down there. 103 00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:03,827 Th-Th-They're setting up chafing dishes. 104 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:05,207 Would you relax, Morty? 105 00:04:05,287 --> 00:04:07,005 There's nothing dishonest about what we're doing. 106 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,378 Now slap on these antennae. They need to think we're aliens. 107 00:04:09,458 --> 00:04:12,462 - What? Why'? - Sh-- Obviously [burps] -- 108 00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:15,013 You really [burps] know nothing about car repair. 109 00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:18,888 [fanfare plays ] 110 00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:20,935 Wait for the ramp, Morty. 111 00:04:21,011 --> 00:04:22,763 They love the slow ramp. 112 00:04:22,846 --> 00:04:25,440 Really gets their dicks hard when they see this ramp 113 00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:27,768 just slowly extending down. 114 00:04:27,851 --> 00:04:29,444 [ Cheering ] 115 00:04:29,519 --> 00:04:30,771 Greetings! 116 00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:33,448 [ Creatures chanting, "Rick! Rick!" ] 117 00:04:33,523 --> 00:04:35,196 Morty, you gotta flip them off. 118 00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,198 I told them it means "peace among worlds." 119 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:38,620 How hilarious is that? 120 00:04:43,074 --> 00:04:44,917 [creatures cheering wildly] 121 00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:46,165 RICK: Coming through. 122 00:04:46,244 --> 00:04:48,121 Two real aliens walking through here. 123 00:04:48,205 --> 00:04:50,128 Rick, our alien friend. 124 00:04:50,207 --> 00:04:52,130 Uh, Mr. President, um, couldn't help but notice 125 00:04:52,209 --> 00:04:54,587 that you were having problems generating power. 126 00:04:54,669 --> 00:04:57,047 That's correct. [chuckles] We've evolved. 127 00:04:57,130 --> 00:05:00,350 Our most brilliant scientist, Zeep Xanflorp, 128 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:02,348 has developed a source of energy 129 00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:05,101 that makes gooble boxes obsolete. 130 00:05:05,180 --> 00:05:07,023 [ Straining ] I would love to see it. 131 00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:09,476 - Fuck You. - What did you say to me?! 132 00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:10,936 "Fuck You." 133 00:05:11,019 --> 00:05:13,818 Y-You told me it means "much obliged." 134 00:05:13,897 --> 00:05:16,867 Oh. Right. Uh, b-blow me. 135 00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:18,694 No, no, no. Blow me. 136 00:05:22,906 --> 00:05:26,956 Zeep, you have an honored guest from beyond the stars. 137 00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:29,584 I said 12 quantum stabilizers, not 11. 138 00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:31,415 Fix it or it's your ass. 139 00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:33,125 Chris, I'm in the middle of something. 140 00:05:33,208 --> 00:05:36,337 Zeep, this is Rick -- The Alien. 141 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,171 Rick The Alien. 142 00:05:38,255 --> 00:05:40,178 Rick The Alien... 143 00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:41,850 Really? You're gonna pull that move? 144 00:05:41,925 --> 00:05:43,643 I guided your entire civilization. 145 00:05:43,718 --> 00:05:45,686 Your people have a holiday named Ricksgiving. 146 00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:47,639 They teach kids about me in school. 147 00:05:47,722 --> 00:05:50,191 I dropped out of school. It's not for smart people. 148 00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:52,110 Ohhhh, snap! 149 00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:54,028 Listen to me, you arrogant little -- 150 00:05:54,104 --> 00:05:57,233 [chuckling ] R-Rick was hoping to see your new energy source. 151 00:05:57,315 --> 00:06:00,239 I think he could learn a lot from you, Zeep. 152 00:06:00,318 --> 00:06:01,865 Fine. 153 00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:03,913 It's hard for people to grasp, 154 00:06:03,989 --> 00:06:06,242 but inside that container is an infinite universe 155 00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:08,247 with a planet capable of generating 156 00:06:08,326 --> 00:06:10,420 massive amounts of power. 157 00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:12,748 I call it a miniverse. 158 00:06:12,831 --> 00:06:14,833 [coughs] Dumb [coughs] Name. 159 00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:16,213 - Excuse me? - [ clears throat] Nothing. 160 00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:18,387 I mean, it's hard for us to comprehend all this. 161 00:06:18,461 --> 00:06:20,384 Would it be possible for us to get some kind of tour 162 00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:22,261 of your miniverse from the inside? 163 00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:23,887 This isn't a fucking chocolate factory. 164 00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:25,435 I don't have time. 165 00:06:25,510 --> 00:06:27,888 Didn't you say time goes more slowly in the miniverse 166 00:06:27,971 --> 00:06:29,894 relative to the real world? 167 00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:32,271 Yes, Chris. Thanks for reminding me of that. 168 00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:34,773 Great President. All right, let's go. 169 00:06:34,853 --> 00:06:36,355 Whoa-Oh! 170 00:06:36,438 --> 00:06:38,532 Hold on to something. 171 00:06:38,607 --> 00:06:40,735 I put an unbounded vacuum inside a temporal field 172 00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:42,364 until a world developed. 173 00:06:42,444 --> 00:06:44,321 I then introduced the people of this world 174 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,624 to the wonders of electricity in the form of a device 175 00:06:47,699 --> 00:06:49,542 I call a flooble crank. 176 00:06:49,618 --> 00:06:52,497 What they don't know is that 80% of every crank's energy output 177 00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:54,422 gets channeled out of the miniverse 178 00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:56,499 to be used by us. 179 00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:58,176 No more gooble boxes. 180 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,003 RICK: I gotta tell you, Zeep, with no disrespect, 181 00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:02,464 I really think what you're doing here is unethical. 182 00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:03,924 It's not cool. - What?! 183 00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:06,931 Y-Y-You got the people on this world slaving away 184 00:07:07,010 --> 00:07:08,637 making your power. 185 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:10,222 I mean, that's what I call slavery. 186 00:07:10,305 --> 00:07:12,057 No, no, no, they work for each other 187 00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:14,268 in exchange for money, which they then -- 188 00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:17,571 Well, that just sounds like slavery with extra steps. 189 00:07:17,646 --> 00:07:21,401 Eek barba dirkle, somebody's gonna get laid in college. 190 00:07:21,483 --> 00:07:22,700 Rick, a word? 191 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:23,823 What the hell was that? 192 00:07:23,902 --> 00:07:25,654 I know. "eek barba dirkle"? 193 00:07:25,737 --> 00:07:27,205 That's a pretty fucked up "ooh la la." 194 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:28,907 No, what are you doing telling this guy 195 00:07:28,990 --> 00:07:30,788 that his miniverse is unethical? 196 00:07:30,867 --> 00:07:32,915 D-Do you not see the hypocrisy here? 197 00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:36,089 Holy crap. You're right, Morty. Hypocrisy! 198 00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:37,962 Somewhere on this planet, there's gotta be an arrogant... 199 00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:40,510 scientist prick on the verge of microverse technology, 200 00:07:40,585 --> 00:07:42,713 which would threaten to make Zeep's flooble cranks obsolete, 201 00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:44,969 forcing Zeep to say microverses are bad, 202 00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:47,847 at which point he'll realize what a hypocrite he's being. 203 00:07:47,926 --> 00:07:50,349 His people will go back to stomping on their gooble boxes, 204 00:07:50,428 --> 00:07:52,977 and you and I will be on ice cream street, baby! 205 00:07:53,056 --> 00:07:54,979 Eating that motherfucking ice cream! 206 00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:56,901 Slurping, slurping, slurping it up. 207 00:07:56,977 --> 00:07:59,196 Wh-Wh-Why are you making that face? 208 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:00,692 Holy shit! 209 00:08:00,772 --> 00:08:02,866 It's me. I've convinced the people of this planet 210 00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:04,818 that I'm a traveler from another world. 211 00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:06,869 You don't think that's over- [burps]... doing it a little? 212 00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:09,073 I mean, you can achieve the same effect with a pair of -- 213 00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:11,249 Never mind. You know what? I shouldn't be so critical. 214 00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:12,576 I'm an alien. 215 00:08:12,659 --> 00:08:14,787 Places, please. We're about to land. 216 00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:20,546 [ Coughs ] Too fast. 217 00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:23,253 [sirens wailing] - SUMMER: [whimpering] 218 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:26,636 FEMALE VOICE: Law enforcement converging on location. 219 00:08:26,715 --> 00:08:27,887 Keep Summer safe. 220 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,640 No! No, no! Don't hurt anybody! 221 00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:33,268 - Confirm custom defense protocol -- 222 00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:36,065 Keep Summer safe -- No physical force. 223 00:08:36,141 --> 00:08:38,235 - Yes. - Processing. 224 00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:41,028 MAN: Come out of the vehicle with your hands in the air! 225 00:08:41,104 --> 00:08:42,777 Scanning assailants. 226 00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:45,700 [warbling, beeping] 227 00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:48,153 Psychological option detected. 228 00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:50,204 [ beeping ] Gestating. 229 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:51,497 "Gestating"? 230 00:08:51,573 --> 00:08:53,166 Come out with your hands up, 231 00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:56,336 or we will be forced to open fire! 232 00:08:56,411 --> 00:08:57,913 - Incoming! - We got a device! 233 00:08:57,996 --> 00:08:59,714 Bomb! Bomb! 234 00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:03,293 Daddy? 235 00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:05,299 Oh, my god. [sighs] 236 00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:06,880 H-Hunter? - Daddy? 237 00:09:06,963 --> 00:09:08,556 What the hell? 238 00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:11,054 Jesus Christ, cease fire! Stay back! 239 00:09:11,134 --> 00:09:12,181 H-H-Hunter? 240 00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:14,058 - Daddy. - Hunter! 241 00:09:14,137 --> 00:09:16,060 [sobbing] Oh, my dear, sweet god, Hunter. 242 00:09:16,139 --> 00:09:17,391 Oh, my boy. My boy. 243 00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:19,852 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It was all my fault. 244 00:09:19,934 --> 00:09:22,062 I'm sorry. Daddy, leave the car alone. 245 00:09:22,145 --> 00:09:23,192 W-W-W-What? 246 00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:25,319 [distorted ] Leave the car alone. 247 00:09:25,398 --> 00:09:26,900 Hunter? Don't -- 248 00:09:26,983 --> 00:09:28,155 Oh, my god. 249 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,407 Stay here, Hunter! No! 250 00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:33,366 [sobbing] God, no! Hunter! 251 00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:35,542 FEMALE VOICE: All of you have loved ones. 252 00:09:35,617 --> 00:09:37,210 All can be returned. 253 00:09:37,285 --> 00:09:39,834 All can be taken away. 254 00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:41,881 Please step away from the vehicle. 255 00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:45,419 Keep Summer safe. 256 00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:48,221 And if you continue to turn your flooble cranks, 257 00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:50,799 I will bring you other great alien advancements. 258 00:09:50,882 --> 00:09:53,226 - Hey, lemme ask you something. - Yes? 259 00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:55,895 Any of your, uh, scientists working on anything new? 260 00:09:55,970 --> 00:09:57,347 All of them. That's their job. 261 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,899 Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I mean, like, energy-wise. 262 00:09:59,974 --> 00:10:02,272 Anyone working on, say, a little universe in a box? 263 00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:04,400 How do you know about that? It's top secret. 264 00:10:04,479 --> 00:10:08,359 ZEEP: So remember -- A crank a day is not nearly enough. 265 00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:10,114 [ Iaughs] Crank it. 266 00:10:10,193 --> 00:10:12,912 I told them this means "peace among worlds." 267 00:10:12,987 --> 00:10:14,330 How hilarious is that? 268 00:10:14,405 --> 00:10:15,998 Re-Really funny, Zeep. 269 00:10:16,074 --> 00:10:18,076 Hey, Zeep, the fake president of your fake world 270 00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:20,537 has something fake important to show you. 271 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,840 MAN: It's not much now, 272 00:10:23,915 --> 00:10:25,883 but once I learn to accelerate the temporal field, 273 00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:28,428 I'll be able to interact with any sentient life that evolves 274 00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:31,177 and introduce them to the wonders of electricity 275 00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:34,260 via a pulley-based device I call a blooble yank. 276 00:10:34,342 --> 00:10:36,470 But what they won't know is -- 277 00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:38,430 You'll be taking most of their energy. 278 00:10:38,513 --> 00:10:39,890 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it. 279 00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:42,442 [ Burps ] It's show- [burps]... time. 280 00:10:46,229 --> 00:10:49,153 You do realize this will make the flooble crank obsolete? 281 00:10:49,232 --> 00:10:52,987 This is wrong, Kyle. What you're doing is wrong. 282 00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:55,367 You're basically -- [scoffs] This is slavery. 283 00:10:55,446 --> 00:10:57,869 You're talking about creating a planet of slaves. 284 00:10:57,949 --> 00:10:59,417 [ Burps ] Told you, Zeep. 285 00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:01,290 Oh, they won't be slaves. 286 00:11:01,369 --> 00:11:03,417 They'll work for each other and pay each other money. 287 00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:08,548 That just sounds like slavery with ex... tra... steps. 288 00:11:08,626 --> 00:11:10,344 - What? - Wait a minute. 289 00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:13,048 Did you create my universe? ls my universe a miniverse? 290 00:11:13,131 --> 00:11:15,259 - Microverse! - Uh, teenyverse. 291 00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:17,218 - Ugh! - You bastard! 292 00:11:17,302 --> 00:11:19,179 Much obliged. 293 00:11:19,262 --> 00:11:22,015 - What the hell is happening? - This is healthy. Trust me. 294 00:11:22,098 --> 00:11:23,896 You're my battery, motherfucker! 295 00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:25,192 [ Groans ] That's all you are. 296 00:11:25,268 --> 00:11:27,191 I made you. Your microverse sucks! 297 00:11:27,270 --> 00:11:29,318 And your miniverse is the size of a fucking lobster tank! 298 00:11:29,397 --> 00:11:30,444 It's wack! 299 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,491 Are they not really aliens? 300 00:11:32,567 --> 00:11:34,865 Nah, they're just a couple of crazy, 301 00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:36,912 wacky scientists, you know? 302 00:11:36,988 --> 00:11:38,456 So he made a universe, 303 00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:40,204 and that guy is from that universe. 304 00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:42,502 - You're my battery! - And that guy made a universe. 305 00:11:42,577 --> 00:11:46,081 And that's the universe where I was born. 306 00:11:46,164 --> 00:11:48,337 Where my father died. 307 00:11:48,416 --> 00:11:50,589 Where I couldn't make time for his funeral 308 00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:55,048 because I was working on my universe. 309 00:11:55,131 --> 00:11:56,883 - I made you! - [ laughs] Yeah. 310 00:11:56,966 --> 00:11:58,593 Science, huh? Ain't it a thing. 311 00:11:58,676 --> 00:12:00,929 You know, one time, Rick sh-- accidentally shot 312 00:12:01,012 --> 00:12:02,605 his laser pistol right through my hand. 313 00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:06,230 You know, I mean, like, Old-Lady Science, you know? 314 00:12:06,309 --> 00:12:08,061 She's a real -- 315 00:12:08,144 --> 00:12:09,396 You got to hang on tight, you know? 316 00:12:09,479 --> 00:12:12,232 Because she -- she -- she bucks pretty hard. 317 00:12:12,315 --> 00:12:15,319 Ooh, boy, what -- Oh, my god, no! 318 00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:21,331 - Teenyverse. - Teenyverse. 319 00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:25,453 Come on, come on, come on. 320 00:12:25,536 --> 00:12:27,664 Pterodactyl! 321 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,090 [laughs] - Asshole! 322 00:12:29,165 --> 00:12:30,667 When I get out of this teenyverse, 323 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,502 I'm gonna smash it to pieces with you in it. 324 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:34,212 Yeah, well, when I get out of this teenyverse, 325 00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:35,888 I'm gonna get out of the surrounding miniverse 326 00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:37,716 and then the microverse around that, and guess what? 327 00:12:37,799 --> 00:12:39,722 Don't make things worse, Rick! 328 00:12:39,801 --> 00:12:41,724 Uh, he's not gonna destroy your universe. 329 00:12:41,803 --> 00:12:43,771 You know, we -- we need it to start our car. 330 00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:45,814 That's what you used my universe for -- 331 00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,688 to run your car? 332 00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,360 Yeah, but don't flatter yourself. 333 00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:52,860 There's always AAA, you fucking cock sucker! 334 00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:54,532 What's he doing? What's he crafting? 335 00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:56,234 I can craft stuff, too, pal! 336 00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:58,160 Just like I crafted your reality! 337 00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:01,281 You crafty son of a -- 338 00:13:01,364 --> 00:13:03,537 Ow! I crafted the guy that created 339 00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,414 the planet you're standing on! 340 00:13:05,493 --> 00:13:06,836 Yeah, and I made the stars that became 341 00:13:06,911 --> 00:13:08,208 the carbon in your mother's ovaries! 342 00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:09,915 I didn't ask to be born! 343 00:13:09,998 --> 00:13:11,545 All right, that's it! I'm out. 344 00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,297 I-I'm gonna go into the wilderness, 345 00:13:13,376 --> 00:13:14,753 and I'm gonna make a new life for myself 346 00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:16,304 among the tree people. 347 00:13:16,379 --> 00:13:17,926 I-lt can't be worse than this. 348 00:13:18,006 --> 00:13:19,553 Sure. Okay, Morty, Just be back before sundown 349 00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:20,929 or the tree people will eat you. 350 00:13:21,009 --> 00:13:22,135 That's a myth! 351 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:24,095 W-W-Why are you trying to start a myth? 352 00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:25,725 It's a prehistoric planet, Morty. 353 00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:27,432 Someone has to bring a little culture. 354 00:13:27,515 --> 00:13:29,188 And I-i-it certainly can't be someone 355 00:13:29,267 --> 00:13:32,111 whose entire culture powers my brake lights! 356 00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:34,609 [sirens wailing] 357 00:13:34,689 --> 00:13:37,158 Go, go, go! 358 00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:39,577 Oh, my god. Oh, god. 359 00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:41,575 What are we gonna do now? 360 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:43,998 FEMALE VOICE: I am unable to destroy this army. 361 00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:46,997 To clarify, I am quite able to destroy this army, 362 00:13:47,076 --> 00:13:49,625 but you will not permit it. - Correct. 363 00:13:49,704 --> 00:13:53,584 You also refuse to authorize emotional countermeasures. 364 00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:56,044 If you're talking about the melting ghost babies, 365 00:13:56,127 --> 00:13:57,879 yes, please, no more of that. 366 00:13:57,962 --> 00:13:59,339 [ Warble ] Confirmed. 367 00:13:59,422 --> 00:14:01,015 [signs] 368 00:14:01,090 --> 00:14:03,058 I am currently constructing a security measure 369 00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:04,977 in compliance with your parameters. 370 00:14:05,053 --> 00:14:08,148 But I do want to say you are not making this easy. 371 00:14:08,222 --> 00:14:09,895 You know you're kind of a dick, right? 372 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:12,898 My function is to keep Summer safe, 373 00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:16,072 not keep Summer being, like, totally stoked 374 00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:19,026 about, like, the general vibe and stuff. 375 00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:21,736 That's you. That's how you talk. 376 00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:27,993 Hey, that's my deer! 377 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:30,837 Aaaaaaah! 378 00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:32,164 Raah! 379 00:14:32,246 --> 00:14:35,295 I hope your god is as big a dick as you. 380 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:40,554 My god's the biggest dick that's never existed. 381 00:14:40,630 --> 00:14:42,758 Why do you think I'm even here? 382 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,012 [snake hisses] 383 00:14:44,092 --> 00:14:46,686 [ Eagle screeches ] You're here... 384 00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:49,139 because you created someone smarter than you. 385 00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:52,938 Oh, I thought we were both here 386 00:14:53,017 --> 00:14:55,145 because I created a universe of idiots. 387 00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:04,158 Kalo kada sha la. 388 00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:06,706 Holy shit. Morty? I haven't seen you in months! 389 00:15:06,781 --> 00:15:08,533 You're leading the tree people? 390 00:15:08,616 --> 00:15:09,959 Huh. That's a step up. 391 00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:11,251 We have no leaders. 392 00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:13,830 We follow only the will of the forest. 393 00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:15,039 Ooh. Wow. 394 00:15:15,123 --> 00:15:16,466 Gaaaaay. 395 00:15:16,541 --> 00:15:18,043 That is pretty gay. 396 00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:19,969 You two call yourselves geniuses, 397 00:15:20,044 --> 00:15:22,672 but you have spent this time learning nothing. 398 00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:24,507 Come with me into the forest. 399 00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:27,139 There is something I wish to teach you. 400 00:15:30,513 --> 00:15:34,108 This is Ku'ala, the spirit tree. 401 00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:36,106 For generations, it has guided the -- 402 00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:39,401 You have to get us the fuck outta here. 403 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:41,278 These people are backwards savages. 404 00:15:41,357 --> 00:15:42,950 They eat every third baby 405 00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:45,073 because they think it makes fruit grow bigger. 406 00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:47,576 Everyone's gross, and they all smell like piss all the time. 407 00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:50,249 I m-- I m-- I miss my family. I miss my laptop. 408 00:15:50,324 --> 00:15:52,076 I masturbated to an extra-curvy piece 409 00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:53,582 of driftwood the other day! 410 00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:55,288 Look, I-l don't care what it takes. 411 00:15:55,371 --> 00:15:56,998 You two are putting aside your bullshit, 412 00:15:57,081 --> 00:15:59,379 and you're working together to get us back home. 413 00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:01,302 No can do, Morty. I just can't. 414 00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:03,004 I just don't see how I can -- 415 00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:04,304 R0 ro dah no gah! 416 00:16:04,380 --> 00:16:07,099 You're smart. You'll figure it out. 417 00:16:07,175 --> 00:16:09,348 [guns cocking] You have 10 seconds 418 00:16:09,427 --> 00:16:11,270 to get out of the ship! 419 00:16:11,345 --> 00:16:14,064 18,9... 420 00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:15,392 All right, not bad. 421 00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,477 I guess you're an okay proto recombinator. 422 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:20,154 I've certainly seen worse ionic cell dioxination. 423 00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:21,947 If this works, drinks are on me. 424 00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:23,650 If drinks are on you, you're gonna need 425 00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:25,360 a second mortgage on that tower. 426 00:16:25,443 --> 00:16:26,945 I'm an alcoholic. 427 00:16:27,028 --> 00:16:28,450 Opium addict. 428 00:16:28,529 --> 00:16:30,702 [ Both laugh ] 429 00:16:30,781 --> 00:16:33,284 All right, okay, okay, okay, wrap it up. 430 00:16:33,367 --> 00:16:34,960 You guys are the fucking worst! 431 00:16:35,036 --> 00:16:36,253 Your gods are a lie! 432 00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,798 Fuck you, fuck nature, and fuck trees! 433 00:16:41,334 --> 00:16:42,506 Yes! You did it! Yes! 434 00:16:42,585 --> 00:16:44,303 Hey, uh, how about that drink? 435 00:16:44,378 --> 00:16:47,131 Sure, I just need to go grab my wallet from inside my ship. 436 00:16:47,215 --> 00:16:48,717 Oh, is your wallet in your ship? 437 00:16:48,799 --> 00:16:50,301 That's where the transporter is, too, 438 00:16:50,384 --> 00:16:51,806 so why don't we come with? 439 00:16:51,886 --> 00:16:55,140 It's cool. I'll be back in a sec. 440 00:16:55,223 --> 00:16:58,978 You know how long a second can take in a microverse? 441 00:16:59,060 --> 00:17:01,154 Run, Morty! That asshole's willing to risk... 442 00:17:01,229 --> 00:17:02,776 everything he cares about just to defeat me! 443 00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:04,232 He's psychotic! 444 00:17:04,315 --> 00:17:05,532 [ Both pant] 445 00:17:06,901 --> 00:17:08,824 - Morty, hop on my back. - Why'? 446 00:17:08,903 --> 00:17:11,326 Go, go [burps] Sanchez ski shoes. 447 00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,501 - Aaaaaah! - ...eight... 448 00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:16,702 [ panting ] 449 00:17:16,786 --> 00:17:18,083 Aaaah! Oof! 450 00:17:18,162 --> 00:17:19,379 [all grunting] 451 00:17:19,455 --> 00:17:21,958 - Hold still. - [grunts] 452 00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:23,793 Oh, hey, guys. 453 00:17:23,876 --> 00:17:26,379 I just finished cooking us a feast. 454 00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:28,180 - Aaaah! - Holy -- 455 00:17:28,256 --> 00:17:30,475 - You monster! - Whoa. Bad tour. 456 00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:32,097 ...seven... 457 00:17:32,176 --> 00:17:33,678 [elevator bell dings] Hey, you gotta sign out. 458 00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:36,105 Nothing you do matters! Your existence is a lie! 459 00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:39,730 If that were really true, then... 460 00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:41,982 - I'm here to see Ron Mendleson. - Third floor. 461 00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:43,688 Would you like to go to dinner with -- 462 00:17:43,771 --> 00:17:45,364 Uh, no. 463 00:17:45,439 --> 00:17:47,862 [ Both panting ] 464 00:17:47,942 --> 00:17:49,910 You may have created this universe, Rick, 465 00:17:49,986 --> 00:17:52,580 but I live in it. - Shit! 466 00:17:52,655 --> 00:17:54,407 What are we gonna do, Rick? We're so screwed. 467 00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:56,208 He's gonna get to the ship and smash the microverse, 468 00:17:56,284 --> 00:17:57,752 and then he's gonna kill us! 469 00:17:57,827 --> 00:17:59,420 Quick, Morty, you've got to turn into a car. 470 00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:01,122 - What?! - A long time ago... 471 00:18:01,205 --> 00:18:02,832 I implanted you with a subdermal chip that could 472 00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:04,713 call upon dormant nanobots in your bloodstream 473 00:18:04,792 --> 00:18:07,045 to restructure your anatomy and turn you into a car. 474 00:18:07,128 --> 00:18:08,550 - Oh, my god! - Concentrate, Morty. 475 00:18:08,629 --> 00:18:09,926 Concentrate and turn into a car, Morty. 476 00:18:10,006 --> 00:18:11,553 [grunts] 477 00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:13,134 Never mind. Here's a taxi. Get in. It's fine. 478 00:18:13,217 --> 00:18:14,935 ...six... 479 00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:18,727 - Hey, Zeep. - Huh? 480 00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:21,434 Happy Ricksgiving, biiiiiitch. 481 00:18:21,517 --> 00:18:23,394 Aaah! 482 00:18:23,477 --> 00:18:24,854 We did it, Morty. 483 00:18:24,937 --> 00:18:26,860 Now let's get out of here and destroy this whole universe. 484 00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:28,282 Excuse me? 485 00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:30,359 ...five -- - Sir? 486 00:18:31,485 --> 00:18:32,907 [spiders hiss] 487 00:18:32,987 --> 00:18:34,705 - Holy hell. - Sir! 488 00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:35,827 [tires screech ] 489 00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:37,032 Hold your fire! 490 00:18:38,659 --> 00:18:39,751 [spider snarls] 491 00:18:39,827 --> 00:18:41,295 What's going on? 492 00:18:41,370 --> 00:18:42,713 FEMALE VOICE: I have brokered a peace agreement 493 00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:45,166 between the giant spiders and the government. 494 00:18:45,249 --> 00:18:48,594 Thanks to the skilled diplomacy of this mysterious space car, 495 00:18:48,669 --> 00:18:51,513 from this day forward, human and spiderkind will live 496 00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:53,466 side by side in peace. 497 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,222 We will stop bombing them, 498 00:18:55,301 --> 00:18:57,224 and they will no longer use their telepathic abilities 499 00:18:57,303 --> 00:18:59,726 to make us wander into webs for later consumption. 500 00:18:59,805 --> 00:19:01,352 Instead, we will work together 501 00:19:01,432 --> 00:19:03,810 to make this world a better place for all, 502 00:19:03,893 --> 00:19:06,146 no matter how many legs. 503 00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:08,356 What do we do about the space car? 504 00:19:08,439 --> 00:19:09,691 Leave it alone. 505 00:19:09,774 --> 00:19:11,367 I mean, what did it really do, anyways? 506 00:19:11,442 --> 00:19:12,694 Kill a guy and paralyze his buddy? 507 00:19:12,777 --> 00:19:15,576 [chuckles] Not a bad trade for spider peace. 508 00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:17,532 All right, that's it. Move out! 509 00:19:22,495 --> 00:19:25,339 [ Iaughs ] I love this spider! 510 00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:27,041 FEMALE VOICE: Summer is safe. 511 00:19:27,124 --> 00:19:28,626 All right, I get it. 512 00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:33,844 ZEEP: Riiiick! 513 00:19:33,923 --> 00:19:35,516 [thunder crashes ] 514 00:19:35,591 --> 00:19:37,184 Don't do it. 515 00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:40,513 You quit school, but you still got some learning to do. 516 00:19:42,765 --> 00:19:48,317 [ Both grunting ] 517 00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:52,571 [ Both groan ] 518 00:19:52,650 --> 00:19:54,277 Aah! 519 00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:55,782 Unh! 520 00:20:02,410 --> 00:20:04,504 [ Snorts, spits ] 521 00:20:04,578 --> 00:20:06,546 Class dismissed. 522 00:20:06,622 --> 00:20:08,920 Geez. 523 00:20:15,548 --> 00:20:17,471 [ Bottles clatter] 524 00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:19,097 - You all right? - Uh-Huh! 525 00:20:19,176 --> 00:20:20,393 What are you doing, Rick? 526 00:20:20,469 --> 00:20:22,096 I'm pretty sure the battery's dead. 527 00:20:22,179 --> 00:20:23,476 Oh, you think so, huh, Morty? 528 00:20:23,556 --> 00:20:25,149 Well, let's see. [engine turns over] 529 00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:27,568 Hey, wait -- Huh? I don't get it. 530 00:20:27,643 --> 00:20:29,862 Of course you don't. But Zeep did. 531 00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:31,439 He knew that once I got back to my car, 532 00:20:31,522 --> 00:20:33,365 one of two things was gonna happen -- 533 00:20:33,441 --> 00:20:35,443 I was gonna have to toss a broken battery, 534 00:20:35,526 --> 00:20:38,370 or the battery wouldn't be broken. 535 00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:46,625 Peace among worlds, Rick. 536 00:20:46,704 --> 00:20:47,830 Jesus. 537 00:20:47,913 --> 00:20:49,506 Yeah. Listen to that baby purr. 538 00:20:49,582 --> 00:20:51,175 You were right, Morty -- 539 00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:52,752 We really just needed to be honest with those guys. 540 00:20:52,835 --> 00:20:54,052 All right, here we go. 541 00:20:56,672 --> 00:20:58,390 Thank y-o-o-o... 542 00:20:58,466 --> 00:21:00,218 See, Morty? This is what it's all about. 543 00:21:00,301 --> 00:21:01,894 This is why we do what we do. 544 00:21:01,969 --> 00:21:03,471 - Uh-Huh. - Ew! What the hell? 545 00:21:03,554 --> 00:21:05,602 Jesus! There's flies in my ice cream. 546 00:21:05,681 --> 00:21:06,898 Presidential decree -- 547 00:21:06,974 --> 00:21:09,352 All ice cream is now for all beings, 548 00:21:09,435 --> 00:21:10,937 no matter how many legs. 549 00:21:11,020 --> 00:21:12,613 What the fuck did you do, Summer?! 550 00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:14,315 It was your ship! Your stupid ship did it! 551 00:21:14,398 --> 00:21:16,025 - Don't blame my ship! - It melted a child! 552 00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:18,031 My ship doesn't do anything unless it's told to! 553 00:21:18,110 --> 00:21:19,783 I don't want to hear it, Summer! 554 00:21:19,862 --> 00:21:21,864 Your boobs are all hanging about, 555 00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:23,790 and you ruined ice cream with your boobs out. 556 00:21:23,866 --> 00:21:25,539 And don't even try to deny it, either. 557 00:21:25,618 --> 00:21:26,744 MORTY: [groans] 558 00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:04,623 [car alarm chirps] 559 00:22:05,616 --> 00:22:07,664 [engine revs, students scream ] 560 00:22:07,743 --> 00:22:14,126 [alarm blaring, horn honking] 561 00:22:14,208 --> 00:22:15,676 Oh, my god! 562 00:22:15,751 --> 00:22:17,128 Did you get any of that? 563 00:22:17,211 --> 00:22:19,179 It's a good show! 563 00:22:20,305 --> 00:22:26,743 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from OpenSubtitles.org