1
00:00:02,569 --> 00:00:05,925
My parents live in Florida now.
They moved there last year.

2
00:00:06,089 --> 00:00:08,728
They didn't wanna move to Florida,
but they're in their 60s...

3
00:00:08,889 --> 00:00:10,083
...and that's the law.

4
00:00:11,569 --> 00:00:14,447
And you know how it works.
They got the leisure police.

5
00:00:14,609 --> 00:00:17,487
They pull up in front of the
old people's house with the golf cart.

6
00:00:17,649 --> 00:00:20,800
"Let's go, pop. White belt, white pants,
white shoes, get in the back.

7
00:00:20,969 --> 00:00:23,085
Drop the snow shovel, right there.
Drop it!"

8
00:00:23,249 --> 00:00:25,968
I am not much
for the family gathering.

9
00:00:26,369 --> 00:00:29,202
You ever sit there, and the
conversation's so boring, it's so dull?

10
00:00:29,369 --> 00:00:31,929
And you start to fantasize.
You know, you think:

11
00:00:32,089 --> 00:00:36,685
"What if I just got up and jumped out
that window? I wonder what..."

12
00:00:36,849 --> 00:00:39,158
Just crash right through the glass,
you know.

13
00:00:39,329 --> 00:00:41,479
Come back. There's broken glass.
Everybody's upset.

14
00:00:41,649 --> 00:00:44,209
"No, I'm all right.
I was just a little bored there.

15
00:00:44,369 --> 00:00:45,927
And, no, I'm fine.
I came back.

16
00:00:46,089 --> 00:00:48,557
I wanna hear more about
that Hummel collection, Aunt Rose.

17
00:00:48,729 --> 00:00:50,481
Let's pick it up right there."

18
00:00:56,569 --> 00:00:59,879
You have so many nice jackets. I don't
know why you had to bring this jacket.

19
00:01:00,049 --> 00:01:01,368
Who wears a jacket like this?

20
00:01:02,329 --> 00:01:04,559
What's wrong
with that nice grey one?

21
00:01:04,889 --> 00:01:07,084
You have beautiful clothes.
They sit in your closet.

22
00:01:07,249 --> 00:01:09,205
Morty, you can't wear this.

23
00:01:15,249 --> 00:01:18,321
- Are you getting that?
- I thought you were getting it.

24
00:01:20,569 --> 00:01:23,879
- Should I pick up?
- Do you want me to get that?

25
00:01:25,009 --> 00:01:27,239
- I'll get it.
- I'll get it.

26
00:01:32,329 --> 00:01:33,648
Hello.

27
00:01:33,809 --> 00:01:35,401
Hello.

28
00:01:43,329 --> 00:01:45,001
- Hi.
- Hi.

29
00:01:45,329 --> 00:01:47,718
Would you make this thing lower?

30
00:01:47,889 --> 00:01:51,564
- I can hear it on the street.
- Hey, Jer, how did you do?

31
00:01:51,729 --> 00:01:54,448
We won.
I made an incredible play in the field.

32
00:01:54,609 --> 00:01:56,247
It was a tag-up at third base.

33
00:01:56,409 --> 00:02:00,322
I threw the guy out,
from left field, on a fly.

34
00:02:00,489 --> 00:02:03,083
We'll be in the championship game
Wednesday because of me.

35
00:02:03,249 --> 00:02:06,082
It was the single greatest
moment in my life.

36
00:02:06,249 --> 00:02:08,683
This is your greatest moment,
a game?

37
00:02:09,809 --> 00:02:13,006
Well, no.
Sharon Besser, of course.

38
00:02:13,649 --> 00:02:15,879
You know what my greatest moment
was, don't you?

39
00:02:16,049 --> 00:02:19,519
In 1946, I went to work
for Harry Flemming...

40
00:02:19,689 --> 00:02:22,601
...and I came up with the idea
for the beltless trench coat.

41
00:02:24,209 --> 00:02:25,881
Jerry, look at this sport jacket.

42
00:02:26,049 --> 00:02:28,324
Is this a jacket to wear
to an anniversary party?

43
00:02:29,129 --> 00:02:32,678
Well, the man's an individualist.
He worked for Harry Flemming.

44
00:02:32,849 --> 00:02:36,364
- He knows what he's doing.
- But it's their 50th anniversary.

45
00:02:36,529 --> 00:02:38,440
Your mother doesn't like
my taste in clothing.

46
00:02:38,769 --> 00:02:40,919
I spoke to Manya and Isaac
on the phone today.

47
00:02:41,089 --> 00:02:43,080
They invited you again.
I think you should go.

48
00:02:43,249 --> 00:02:45,046
First of all,
I made plans with Elaine.

49
00:02:45,209 --> 00:02:46,927
So bring her.

50
00:02:47,089 --> 00:02:50,126
I don't even know them.
What is she, your second cousin?

51
00:02:50,289 --> 00:02:52,086
I mean, I met them
three times in my life.

52
00:02:52,249 --> 00:02:53,443
I don't know her either.

53
00:02:53,609 --> 00:02:58,080
She made me fly from Florida for this,
and then she criticizes my jacket.

54
00:02:59,569 --> 00:03:02,879
At least come and say hello,
have a cup of coffee, then you leave.

55
00:03:03,049 --> 00:03:04,641
How come he gets to leave?

56
00:03:06,209 --> 00:03:09,485
If I wind up sitting next to Uncle Leo,
I am leaving.

57
00:03:09,649 --> 00:03:12,083
He's always grabbing my arm
when he talks to me.

58
00:03:12,249 --> 00:03:16,288
I guess because so many people have
left in the middle of his conversation.

59
00:03:16,769 --> 00:03:18,725
And it's always
about Jeffrey, right?

60
00:03:18,889 --> 00:03:21,961
Yeah. He talks about him
like he split the atom.

61
00:03:22,129 --> 00:03:24,085
The kid works for
the Parks Department.

62
00:03:25,489 --> 00:03:28,879
- Morty, you coming in?
- Oh, yeah. I forgot all about it.

63
00:03:29,049 --> 00:03:31,165
- Hey. How'd you do?
- We won.

64
00:03:31,329 --> 00:03:33,604
- We're in the finals on Wednesday.
- Yeah!

65
00:03:33,769 --> 00:03:35,361
What is this about?

66
00:03:35,529 --> 00:03:37,997
I'm completely changing
the configuration of the apartment.

67
00:03:38,169 --> 00:03:41,002
You're not gonna believe it when
you see it. Whole new lifestyle.

68
00:03:41,969 --> 00:03:44,164
- What are you doing?
- Levels.

69
00:03:45,969 --> 00:03:47,163
- Levels.
- Yeah.

70
00:03:47,329 --> 00:03:49,365
I'm getting rid of all my furniture,
all of it...

71
00:03:49,529 --> 00:03:51,804
...and I'm gonna build
these different levels.

72
00:03:51,969 --> 00:03:53,482
You know, with steps.

73
00:03:53,649 --> 00:03:55,844
And it'll all be carpeted.

74
00:03:56,089 --> 00:03:57,920
With a lot of pillows.

75
00:03:58,129 --> 00:03:59,881
You know, like ancient Egypt.

76
00:04:01,809 --> 00:04:04,323
- You drew up plans for this?
- No. No, it's all in my head.

77
00:04:04,649 --> 00:04:06,480
I don't see how you can
get comfortable.

78
00:04:06,729 --> 00:04:08,321
Oh, I'll get comfortable.

79
00:04:08,489 --> 00:04:10,525
When do you intend to do this?

80
00:04:11,489 --> 00:04:13,480
Should be done
by the end of the month.

81
00:04:13,649 --> 00:04:16,959
- Gonna do this yourself?
- It's a simple job.

82
00:04:17,849 --> 00:04:21,478
- Well, you don't think I can, huh?
- No, it's not that I don't think you can.

83
00:04:21,649 --> 00:04:24,959
I know that you can't,
and I'm positive that you won't.

84
00:04:26,609 --> 00:04:30,238
Well, I got the tools. I got the pillows.
All I need is the lumber.

85
00:04:30,409 --> 00:04:34,925
- Hey, that's some big job.
- I don't see it happening.

86
00:04:35,929 --> 00:04:37,840
Yeah, well, this time-
This time you're wrong.

87
00:04:38,009 --> 00:04:39,761
- Come on, I'll even bet you.
- Seriously?

88
00:04:39,929 --> 00:04:42,807
I don't want you betting.
Morty, don't let them bet.

89
00:04:42,969 --> 00:04:46,166
A big dinner with dessert,
but I got till the end of the month.

90
00:04:46,529 --> 00:04:49,123
- I'll give you a year.
- No, no.

91
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:52,326
- No, no, a month. End of the month.
- It's a bet.

92
00:05:02,649 --> 00:05:04,799
Seriously, do you wanna
switch chairs?

93
00:05:09,889 --> 00:05:11,800
No, no. I'm fine.

94
00:05:11,969 --> 00:05:14,437
Oh, Jerry, you listening to this?

95
00:05:14,609 --> 00:05:16,520
Yeah, Uncle Leo.

96
00:05:17,209 --> 00:05:22,920
So now the Parks commissioner is
recommending Jeffrey for a citation.

97
00:05:23,089 --> 00:05:26,126
Right, for the reducing
of the pond scum?

98
00:05:26,289 --> 00:05:30,248
No, no, no. For the walking tours.

99
00:05:30,409 --> 00:05:35,119
Oh, yeah, where the people eat
the plant life, the edible-foliage tour.

100
00:05:35,529 --> 00:05:37,485
That's exactly right.

101
00:05:37,769 --> 00:05:41,000
He knows the whole history
of the park.

102
00:05:41,169 --> 00:05:45,003
For two hours, he's talking
and answering questions.

103
00:05:45,169 --> 00:05:47,000
But you wanna know something?

104
00:05:47,169 --> 00:05:49,729
Whenever he has a problem
with a high-powered big shot...

105
00:05:49,889 --> 00:05:51,766
...from the Parks Department...

106
00:05:51,929 --> 00:05:53,885
...you know who he calls?

107
00:05:54,129 --> 00:05:55,721
Mickey Mantle?

108
00:05:55,889 --> 00:05:58,244
Jerry. Jerry.

109
00:05:58,409 --> 00:06:00,240
Did you taste these peas?

110
00:06:00,409 --> 00:06:02,798
These peas are great.

111
00:06:02,969 --> 00:06:06,405
These peas are bursting
with country-fresh flavour.

112
00:06:08,369 --> 00:06:11,839
Phenomenal peas.

113
00:06:12,369 --> 00:06:14,837
- Are you ready for dessert?
- Well...

114
00:06:15,009 --> 00:06:17,921
...actually, we do have
to kind of get going.

115
00:06:18,249 --> 00:06:19,443
You're going?

116
00:06:20,729 --> 00:06:24,722
- I don't really eat dessert. I'm dieting.
- Yeah, I can't eat dessert either.

117
00:06:24,889 --> 00:06:28,006
The sugar makes my ankles swell up,
and I can't dance.

118
00:06:28,689 --> 00:06:31,408
- Can't dance?
- He's kidding, Manya.

119
00:06:31,569 --> 00:06:33,446
Is that a joke?

120
00:06:34,569 --> 00:06:36,480
So did you hear Claire's
getting married?

121
00:06:36,649 --> 00:06:37,798
Yeah, yeah.

122
00:06:37,969 --> 00:06:39,880
I hear the fellow owns
a couple racehorses.

123
00:06:40,049 --> 00:06:42,404
- You know, trotters, like at Yonkers.
- Horses.

124
00:06:42,929 --> 00:06:44,965
They're like big riding dogs.

125
00:06:45,129 --> 00:06:48,804
What about ponies, huh?
What kind of abnormal animal is that?

126
00:06:49,169 --> 00:06:51,399
And those kids who had
their own ponies.

127
00:06:51,569 --> 00:06:53,002
Oh, I know. I hated those kids.

128
00:06:53,169 --> 00:06:56,878
In fact, I hate anyone that ever had
a pony when they were growing up.

129
00:06:57,209 --> 00:06:58,608
I had a pony.

130
00:07:03,649 --> 00:07:07,881
Well, I didn't really mean
a pony per se.

131
00:07:08,089 --> 00:07:11,081
When I was a little girl in Poland...

132
00:07:11,249 --> 00:07:13,365
...we all had ponies.

133
00:07:13,529 --> 00:07:15,247
My sister had pony.

134
00:07:15,409 --> 00:07:17,161
My cousin had pony.

135
00:07:17,329 --> 00:07:20,002
- So, what's wrong with that?
- Nothing, nothing at all.

136
00:07:20,169 --> 00:07:22,729
- I was just merely expressing-
- Should we have some coffee?

137
00:07:22,889 --> 00:07:25,164
Who's having coffee?

138
00:07:25,329 --> 00:07:28,685
He was a beautiful pony,
and I loved him.

139
00:07:28,849 --> 00:07:31,682
Well, I'm sure you did.
Who wouldn't love a pony?

140
00:07:32,009 --> 00:07:34,398
Who wouldn't love a person
that had a pony?

141
00:07:34,609 --> 00:07:36,679
You. You said so.

142
00:07:36,849 --> 00:07:39,079
No, see, we didn't have ponies.

143
00:07:39,249 --> 00:07:42,002
I'm sure at that time in Poland,
they were common. They were...

144
00:07:42,169 --> 00:07:43,727
...probably like compact cars.

145
00:07:45,449 --> 00:07:46,928
That's it.

146
00:07:47,089 --> 00:07:49,159
I had enough.

147
00:07:52,769 --> 00:07:54,168
Have your coffee, everybody.

148
00:07:54,769 --> 00:07:58,125
She's a little upset.
It's been an emotional day.

149
00:08:00,929 --> 00:08:03,568
I didn't know she had a pony.

150
00:08:04,169 --> 00:08:06,444
How was I to know she had a pony?

151
00:08:06,609 --> 00:08:08,884
Who figures an immigrant
is gonna have a pony?

152
00:08:10,969 --> 00:08:13,563
Do you know what
the odds are on that?

153
00:08:14,129 --> 00:08:16,927
I mean, in all the pictures I saw
of immigrants on boats...

154
00:08:17,089 --> 00:08:18,886
...coming into New York Harbour...

155
00:08:19,049 --> 00:08:21,119
...I never saw one of them
sitting on a pony.

156
00:08:23,369 --> 00:08:26,281
But why would anyone come here
if they had a pony?

157
00:08:26,449 --> 00:08:29,839
Who leaves a country packed with
ponies to go to a non-pony country?

158
00:08:30,929 --> 00:08:33,284
It doesn't make sense.

159
00:08:33,809 --> 00:08:35,720
Am I wrong?

160
00:08:39,809 --> 00:08:43,085
- I'll drive you to the airport.
- No, we're taking a cab.

161
00:08:43,249 --> 00:08:47,845
I just hope that whole pony incident
didn't put a damper on the trip.

162
00:08:48,209 --> 00:08:50,769
Oh, don't be ridiculous.
It was a misunderstanding.

163
00:08:50,929 --> 00:08:52,601
Hey, I agree with him.

164
00:08:52,769 --> 00:08:55,078
Nobody likes a kid with a pony.

165
00:08:55,889 --> 00:08:59,518
Well, if you ever talk to her, tell her I'm
sorry. Elaine too. She feels terrible.

166
00:08:59,689 --> 00:09:02,408
- You know, you should call Manya.
- Maybe I will.

167
00:09:03,089 --> 00:09:04,807
- Oh, hi. Hey.
- Hey.

168
00:09:04,969 --> 00:09:07,802
I just came to say goodbye.

169
00:09:07,969 --> 00:09:10,324
- Hey, need any help with those?
- It's nothing. I got it.

170
00:09:10,489 --> 00:09:12,719
So how are your levels
coming along?

171
00:09:13,369 --> 00:09:16,088
Well, I decided I'm not gonna do it.

172
00:09:17,329 --> 00:09:19,889
Really? What a shock.

173
00:09:20,409 --> 00:09:22,001
- Goodbye. We'll call you.
- Take care.

174
00:09:22,169 --> 00:09:23,807
- Bye, Jer.
- Bye, Dad. Take it easy.

175
00:09:23,969 --> 00:09:26,563
- Bye, Mr. Kramer.
- Yeah, so long, Morty.

176
00:09:29,089 --> 00:09:30,488
So...

177
00:09:30,769 --> 00:09:32,919
...when do I get my dinner?

178
00:09:33,089 --> 00:09:36,286
There's no dinner. The bet's off.
I'm not gonna do it.

179
00:09:36,889 --> 00:09:39,164
Yes, I know you're not gonna do it.
That's why I bet.

180
00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:41,399
Yeah, well, there's no bet
if I'm not doing it.

181
00:09:41,569 --> 00:09:44,561
That's the bet,
that you're not doing it.

182
00:09:44,729 --> 00:09:46,481
Yeah, I could do it.
I don't wanna do it.

183
00:09:46,769 --> 00:09:48,521
We didn't bet on
if you wanted to do it...

184
00:09:48,689 --> 00:09:50,122
...we bet on if it would be done.

185
00:09:50,289 --> 00:09:53,201
- And it could be done.
- Well, of course it could be done.

186
00:09:53,369 --> 00:09:57,965
Anything could be done,
but it only is done if it's done.

187
00:09:58,129 --> 00:09:59,608
Show me the levels.

188
00:09:59,769 --> 00:10:03,239
- The bet is the levels.
- I don't want the levels.

189
00:10:03,409 --> 00:10:04,842
That's the bet.

190
00:10:06,809 --> 00:10:08,208
Man.

191
00:10:09,329 --> 00:10:10,921
Hello.

192
00:10:11,409 --> 00:10:13,365
No. Oh, hi.

193
00:10:15,049 --> 00:10:16,880
No, they just left.

194
00:10:18,569 --> 00:10:20,605
Oh, my God.

195
00:10:21,249 --> 00:10:24,047
Hang on a second,
maybe I can still catch them.

196
00:10:25,489 --> 00:10:27,878
Ma. Ma, up here.

197
00:10:28,049 --> 00:10:29,721
Don't get in the cab.

198
00:10:29,889 --> 00:10:31,880
Manya died.

199
00:10:32,049 --> 00:10:34,609
Manya died!

200
00:10:40,529 --> 00:10:42,440
- Who'd you talk to?
- Uncle Leo.

201
00:10:42,609 --> 00:10:45,169
- And when's the funeral?
- I don't know, said he'd call back.

202
00:10:45,329 --> 00:10:46,523
You know what this means?

203
00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:50,204
We lost the supersaver.
Those tickets are nonrefundable.

204
00:10:51,609 --> 00:10:55,841
She just had a checkup.
The doctor said she was fine.

205
00:10:56,329 --> 00:10:58,923
- Unless...
- What?

206
00:10:59,409 --> 00:11:01,684
What? Nothing.

207
00:11:03,049 --> 00:11:04,528
You don't think...?

208
00:11:04,689 --> 00:11:05,917
What, the pony remark?

209
00:11:06,689 --> 00:11:09,487
Oh, don't be ridiculous.
She was an old woman.

210
00:11:09,649 --> 00:11:10,843
You don't think I killed her?

211
00:11:12,209 --> 00:11:13,847
You know what that flight
will cost us?

212
00:11:14,169 --> 00:11:15,841
It was an innocent comment.

213
00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:17,328
I didn't know she had a pony.

214
00:11:17,809 --> 00:11:20,039
Maybe we could get
an Army transport flight.

215
00:11:20,209 --> 00:11:22,404
They got a base in Sarasota, I think.

216
00:11:22,769 --> 00:11:25,602
I mean, the whole thing was taken
out of context. It was a joke.

217
00:11:27,169 --> 00:11:29,160
That's probably Uncle Leo.

218
00:11:30,369 --> 00:11:31,768
Hello.

219
00:11:32,289 --> 00:11:34,200
Yes, I know.

220
00:11:34,929 --> 00:11:37,318
Well, it's just one of those things.

221
00:11:37,769 --> 00:11:40,727
Sure, sure. We'll see you then.

222
00:11:41,369 --> 00:11:43,246
The funeral's Wednesday.

223
00:11:43,409 --> 00:11:46,481
Wednesday?
What-? What Wednesday?

224
00:11:46,649 --> 00:11:48,048
Two o'clock, Wednesday.

225
00:11:49,569 --> 00:11:51,685
- What?
- I got a softball game on Wednesday.

226
00:11:51,849 --> 00:11:52,998
It's the championship.

227
00:11:53,649 --> 00:11:55,765
So you're not obligated.
Go play in your game.

228
00:11:56,089 --> 00:11:58,080
- I didn't even know the woman.
- So don't go.

229
00:11:58,249 --> 00:12:01,002
I mean, I met her three times.
I don't even know her last name.

230
00:12:01,169 --> 00:12:02,761
Jerry, no one's forcing you.

231
00:12:03,009 --> 00:12:06,126
I mean, who has a funeral
on a Wednesday?

232
00:12:06,409 --> 00:12:08,081
That's what I wanna know.
I mean...

233
00:12:08,249 --> 00:12:10,444
...this is the championship.
I'm hitting everything.

234
00:12:10,609 --> 00:12:13,999
I don't have a dress to wear.
And, you, you don't have anything.

235
00:12:14,169 --> 00:12:16,285
I got my sport jacket.

236
00:12:17,289 --> 00:12:18,881
You're not wearing that to a funeral.

237
00:12:19,049 --> 00:12:21,438
- What's wrong with it?
- It looks ridiculous.

238
00:12:21,609 --> 00:12:23,406
What, I'm gonna buy
a new sport jacket now?

239
00:12:23,569 --> 00:12:24,684
I don't know what to do.

240
00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:29,567
You know what this funeral's gonna
wind up costing me? Oh, boy.

241
00:12:30,889 --> 00:12:32,880
We don't understand death.

242
00:12:33,049 --> 00:12:36,837
And the proof of this is that
we give dead people a pillow.

243
00:12:37,369 --> 00:12:40,600
And, I mean, hey, you know.

244
00:12:40,769 --> 00:12:45,047
I think if you can't stretch out
and get some solid rest at that point...

245
00:12:45,529 --> 00:12:50,319
...I don't see how bedding accessories
really make the difference.

246
00:12:51,089 --> 00:12:53,364
I mean, they got the guy
in a suit, with a pillow.

247
00:12:53,529 --> 00:12:56,919
Now, is he going to a meeting,
or is he catching 40 winks?

248
00:12:57,089 --> 00:13:00,399
I mean, let's make up our mind
where we think they're going.

249
00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,201
I actually like ponies.

250
00:13:04,369 --> 00:13:07,088
I was just trying
to make conversation.

251
00:13:07,249 --> 00:13:10,480
- What time is your game?
-2:45.

252
00:13:10,649 --> 00:13:14,039
- And what time is the funeral?
- Two o'clock.

253
00:13:14,529 --> 00:13:16,042
How long does a funeral take?

254
00:13:16,329 --> 00:13:18,763
Depends on how nice
the person was...

255
00:13:19,369 --> 00:13:22,884
...but you gotta figure
even Oswald took 45 minutes.

256
00:13:24,409 --> 00:13:25,967
So you can't do both.

257
00:13:26,129 --> 00:13:28,404
You know,
if the situation were reversed...

258
00:13:28,569 --> 00:13:32,608
...and Manya had some mahjong
championship or something...

259
00:13:32,769 --> 00:13:36,318
...I wouldn't expect her to go
to my funeral. I would understand.

260
00:13:36,689 --> 00:13:39,078
How can you even consider
not going?

261
00:13:39,889 --> 00:13:41,641
You know, I've been thinking.

262
00:13:41,809 --> 00:13:43,606
I cannot envision
any circumstance...

263
00:13:43,769 --> 00:13:46,920
...in which I'll ever have
the opportunity to have sex again.

264
00:13:49,049 --> 00:13:50,801
How's it gonna happen?

265
00:13:53,809 --> 00:13:55,879
I just don't see how it could occur.

266
00:13:56,609 --> 00:13:59,806
You know, funerals always make me
think about my own mortality...

267
00:13:59,969 --> 00:14:02,927
...and how I'm actually
gonna die someday.

268
00:14:03,089 --> 00:14:05,080
Me, dead.

269
00:14:05,649 --> 00:14:06,684
Imagine that.

270
00:14:07,089 --> 00:14:09,444
They always make me
take stock of my life...

271
00:14:09,609 --> 00:14:13,158
...how I've pretty much wasted all of it
and how I plan to continue wasting it.

272
00:14:13,649 --> 00:14:15,048
I know, then you say to yourself:

273
00:14:15,209 --> 00:14:18,121
"From this moment on,
I'm not gonna waste any more of it."

274
00:14:18,289 --> 00:14:19,688
But then you go, "How?

275
00:14:19,849 --> 00:14:21,760
I mean, what can I do
that's not wasting it?"

276
00:14:21,929 --> 00:14:24,443
Well, is this a waste of time?
What should we be doing?

277
00:14:24,609 --> 00:14:27,328
- Can't you have coffee with people?
- You know...

278
00:14:27,489 --> 00:14:30,162
You know, I can't believe
you're even considering not playing.

279
00:14:30,329 --> 00:14:32,320
We need you.
You're hitting everything.

280
00:14:32,489 --> 00:14:35,640
He has to go.
He may have killed her.

281
00:14:37,129 --> 00:14:38,278
Me?

282
00:14:38,449 --> 00:14:40,644
What about you?
You brought up the pony.

283
00:14:41,089 --> 00:14:46,288
Oh, yeah, but I didn't say
I hated anyone who had one.

284
00:14:46,569 --> 00:14:49,481
- Who's gonna play left field?
- Bender?

285
00:14:49,649 --> 00:14:52,959
Bender? He can't play left.
He stinks.

286
00:14:53,129 --> 00:14:56,405
I just don't see what purpose
it's gonna serve, you going.

287
00:14:56,569 --> 00:14:59,402
I mean, you think dead people care
who's at their funeral?

288
00:14:59,569 --> 00:15:01,525
They don't even know
they're having a funeral.

289
00:15:01,689 --> 00:15:05,967
It's not like she's in the back going,
"I can't believe Jerry didn't show up."

290
00:15:06,129 --> 00:15:09,007
Maybe she's there in spirit.
How about that?

291
00:15:09,369 --> 00:15:13,248
If you're a spirit, and you can travel
to other dimensions and galaxies...

292
00:15:13,409 --> 00:15:15,639
...and find out the mysteries
of the universe...

293
00:15:15,809 --> 00:15:19,040
...you think she'll be at Drexler's
Funeral Home on Ocean Parkway?

294
00:15:19,889 --> 00:15:24,007
George, I met this woman. She is not
travelling to any other dimensions.

295
00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:27,961
Do you know how easy it is
for dead people to travel?

296
00:15:28,129 --> 00:15:31,041
It's not like getting on a bus.
One second:

297
00:15:31,209 --> 00:15:32,358
It's all mental.

298
00:15:36,289 --> 00:15:39,599
Fifty years they were married.
Now he's moving to Phoenix.

299
00:15:40,809 --> 00:15:43,721
Phoenix? What's happening
with his apartment?

300
00:15:43,889 --> 00:15:46,767
I don't know. They've been in there
since, like, World War ll.

301
00:15:46,929 --> 00:15:48,965
Rent's $300 a month.

302
00:15:49,129 --> 00:15:51,563
Three hundred a month?

303
00:15:51,769 --> 00:15:54,283
Oh, my God.

304
00:15:54,449 --> 00:15:57,805
Although this may seem
like a sad event...

305
00:15:57,969 --> 00:16:00,324
...it should not be a day of mourning...

306
00:16:00,489 --> 00:16:04,198
...for Manya had a rich, fulfilling life.

307
00:16:05,009 --> 00:16:08,968
She grew up in a different world,
a simpler world...

308
00:16:09,129 --> 00:16:12,758
...with loving parents,
a beautiful home in the country.

309
00:16:12,929 --> 00:16:15,887
And from what I understand,
she even had a pony.

310
00:16:17,889 --> 00:16:21,802
Oh, how she loved that pony.

311
00:16:23,089 --> 00:16:27,128
Even in her declining years,
whenever she would speak of it...

312
00:16:27,289 --> 00:16:29,757
...her eyes would light up.

313
00:16:29,969 --> 00:16:33,359
Its lustrous coat, its flowing mane.

314
00:16:33,529 --> 00:16:36,839
It was the pride of Cracow.

315
00:16:42,049 --> 00:16:46,088
Well, game's starting
just about now.

316
00:16:46,249 --> 00:16:48,843
It was good that the two of you came.
It was a nice gesture.

317
00:16:49,009 --> 00:16:51,569
I'm not a doctor yet, Uncle Morty.
I'm just an intern.

318
00:16:51,729 --> 00:16:53,321
I can't write a note to an airline.

319
00:16:55,329 --> 00:16:59,083
You got your degree. They don't care.
They just wanna see something.

320
00:16:59,969 --> 00:17:02,529
- I just wanted to say how sorry I was.
- Jerry...

321
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:04,645
...you wanna hear something?

322
00:17:05,969 --> 00:17:08,529
Your cousin Jeffrey
is switching parks.

323
00:17:08,689 --> 00:17:10,441
They're transferring him
to Riverside...

324
00:17:10,609 --> 00:17:13,487
...so he'll completely revamp
that operation, you understand?

325
00:17:13,649 --> 00:17:14,638
Yeah.

326
00:17:14,809 --> 00:17:18,768
He'll do in Riverside now
what he did in Central Park.

327
00:17:19,449 --> 00:17:20,848
More money.

328
00:17:21,009 --> 00:17:22,237
So...

329
00:17:22,409 --> 00:17:24,365
...that's your cousin.

330
00:17:25,529 --> 00:17:29,158
You don't understand.
I've never paid full fare.

331
00:17:29,369 --> 00:17:32,167
Once again, I just wanted to say
how sorry I am...

332
00:17:32,329 --> 00:17:34,320
- ... about the other night.
- Oh, me too.

333
00:17:34,489 --> 00:17:36,525
Oh, no, no, no.
She forgot all about that.

334
00:17:37,489 --> 00:17:40,959
She was much more upset
about the potato salad.

335
00:17:41,129 --> 00:17:44,439
So I understand
you're moving to Phoenix.

336
00:17:44,609 --> 00:17:47,203
Yeah. My brother lives there.

337
00:17:47,369 --> 00:17:49,644
I think Manya would've
liked Phoenix.

338
00:17:50,209 --> 00:17:52,245
Gorgeous, exquisite town.

339
00:17:52,409 --> 00:17:56,368
So, what's happening
with your apartment?

340
00:17:56,769 --> 00:17:58,088
Of course...

341
00:17:58,249 --> 00:18:00,843
...it's very hot there.
I'll have to get an air conditioner.

342
00:18:01,009 --> 00:18:03,204
Oh, you can have mine.
I'll ship it out to you.

343
00:18:03,369 --> 00:18:08,204
But what about that big apartment
on West End Avenue?

344
00:18:08,369 --> 00:18:10,439
Although, they say it's a dry heat.

345
00:18:10,609 --> 00:18:14,966
Dry, wet. What's happening
with your apartment?

346
00:18:15,809 --> 00:18:18,926
I don't even know if I should take
my winter clothing.

347
00:18:20,369 --> 00:18:22,360
I have an idea.

348
00:18:22,529 --> 00:18:25,521
Leave the winter clothing
in the apartment...

349
00:18:25,689 --> 00:18:27,486
...and I'll watch it for you.

350
00:18:27,649 --> 00:18:32,325
And I'll live there, and I'll make sure
that nothing happens to it.

351
00:18:32,729 --> 00:18:34,879
Oh, the apartment.

352
00:18:35,049 --> 00:18:36,846
Jeffrey's taking the apartment.

353
00:18:37,689 --> 00:18:41,648
- Oh, Jeffrey.
- You know Jeffrey.

354
00:18:42,009 --> 00:18:45,968
Yeah, from what I understand,
he works for the Parks Department.

355
00:18:48,889 --> 00:18:51,881
- It's raining.
- It's raining?

356
00:18:52,889 --> 00:18:54,561
It's raining.

357
00:18:55,009 --> 00:18:56,806
The game will be postponed.

358
00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:58,766
We'll play tomorrow.

359
00:18:59,049 --> 00:19:00,880
Believe me,
I wouldn't bother you...

360
00:19:01,049 --> 00:19:04,519
...if the Army hadn't closed
that base in Sarasota.

361
00:19:05,009 --> 00:19:08,968
- Here, scribble a little something here.
- I can't. I'll get in trouble.

362
00:19:09,129 --> 00:19:11,120
Oh, for God's sake.

363
00:19:13,169 --> 00:19:15,285
Who gets picked off in softball?

364
00:19:17,009 --> 00:19:19,284
- It's unheard-of.
- Never happened to me before.

365
00:19:20,089 --> 00:19:25,322
I remember saying to myself,
"Why is Jerry so far off the base?"

366
00:19:25,489 --> 00:19:28,720
I'll have to live with this shame
for the rest of my life.

367
00:19:28,889 --> 00:19:31,881
Look. Then in the fifth inning,
why did you take off on the pop fly?

368
00:19:32,049 --> 00:19:34,165
I thought there were two outs.

369
00:19:34,329 --> 00:19:36,684
I couldn't believe it
when I saw you running.

370
00:19:36,849 --> 00:19:40,524
I thought maybe they had
changed the rules or something.

371
00:19:40,769 --> 00:19:43,602
It was the single worst moment
of my life.

372
00:19:43,889 --> 00:19:45,322
What about Sharon Besser?

373
00:19:45,489 --> 00:19:47,719
Oh, well, of course, 1973.

374
00:19:48,049 --> 00:19:51,246
- Makes you wonder, doesn't it?
- Wonder about what?

375
00:19:52,689 --> 00:19:55,078
You know, the spirit world.

376
00:19:56,529 --> 00:19:59,407
Wait, you think Manya showed up
during the game and put a hex on me?

377
00:20:00,089 --> 00:20:02,967
I never saw anyone play like that.

378
00:20:03,569 --> 00:20:04,968
But I went to the funeral.

379
00:20:05,449 --> 00:20:08,521
Yeah, but that doesn't make up
for killing her.

380
00:20:09,649 --> 00:20:11,082
Maybe Manya missed the funeral...

381
00:20:11,249 --> 00:20:13,604
...because she was off visiting
another galaxy that day.

382
00:20:13,769 --> 00:20:16,602
Don't you think she would've heard
I was there?

383
00:20:16,769 --> 00:20:18,760
Not necessarily.

384
00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:25,562
Who figures an immigrant
is gonna have a pony?

385
00:20:27,289 --> 00:20:29,849
What is the pony?
What is the point of the pony?

386
00:20:30,009 --> 00:20:32,523
Why do we have these animals,
these ponies?

387
00:20:32,689 --> 00:20:35,726
What do we do with them,
besides the pony ride?

388
00:20:35,889 --> 00:20:38,005
Well, why ponies?
What are we doing with them?

389
00:20:38,169 --> 00:20:41,047
I mean, police don't use them for,
you know, crowd control.

390
00:20:41,489 --> 00:20:44,526
"Hey, you wanna get back
behind the barricades?

391
00:20:44,929 --> 00:20:46,248
Hey.

392
00:20:46,489 --> 00:20:47,922
Hey, little boy.

393
00:20:48,089 --> 00:20:50,125
Yeah, I'm talking to you. Just-

394
00:20:50,289 --> 00:20:52,723
Behind the barricades."

395
00:20:56,369 --> 00:21:00,521
So somebody, I assume,
genetically engineered these ponies.

396
00:21:00,689 --> 00:21:04,523
Think they could make them any size?
Like the size of a quarter if they want?

397
00:21:06,009 --> 00:21:08,842
That would be fun for Monopoly,
wouldn't it? Have a little pony.

398
00:21:09,009 --> 00:21:10,283
And you put him on the-

399
00:21:10,449 --> 00:21:13,327
"Baltic, that's two down. Go ahead.
Hold it. There. Baltic, that's-

400
00:21:13,489 --> 00:21:16,401
Yeah, Fine. Right there,
hold it right there."

401
00:22:01,289 --> 00:22:03,280
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