1 00:00:02,546 --> 00:00:04,104 Doctor is a prestigious occupation... 2 00:00:05,426 --> 00:00:07,098 ...but it's one of the only jobs... 3 00:00:07,266 --> 00:00:10,099 ...where you have to have your diploma right up there on the wall. 4 00:00:10,266 --> 00:00:12,257 It makes them seem so insecure, doesn't it? 5 00:00:12,426 --> 00:00:15,020 "I really am a doctor, you know. 6 00:00:15,746 --> 00:00:18,260 If you think I'm not, just check it out." 7 00:00:19,506 --> 00:00:21,497 I don't know why they need these little bits... 8 00:00:21,666 --> 00:00:23,224 ...of psychological leverage over us. 9 00:00:23,386 --> 00:00:25,854 "Go in that room, take your pants off, wait 15 minutes... 10 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:28,586 ...then I'll give you my opinion." 11 00:00:29,266 --> 00:00:31,018 After that, anybody with pants on... 12 00:00:31,186 --> 00:00:33,336 ...seems like they know what they're talking about. 13 00:00:33,506 --> 00:00:37,294 In any difference of opinion, pants always beats no pants. 14 00:00:43,146 --> 00:00:45,102 Can I say one word to you? 15 00:00:45,266 --> 00:00:46,699 Lobster. 16 00:00:46,866 --> 00:00:48,618 The lobster here is unbelievable. 17 00:00:51,106 --> 00:00:52,903 A little expensive. 18 00:00:53,346 --> 00:00:56,179 - Twenty-five dollars. - Yes, well, you know... 19 00:00:56,346 --> 00:00:58,416 ...I'm not thinking about the price. 20 00:00:58,586 --> 00:01:01,703 You know, you're the only woman I've never thought about the price. 21 00:01:01,866 --> 00:01:03,458 Get the lobster. I beg you to get it. 22 00:01:03,626 --> 00:01:06,060 - Go for it. Go for the lobster. - George... 23 00:01:06,226 --> 00:01:07,784 George... 24 00:01:07,946 --> 00:01:09,982 ...I think we have to talk. 25 00:01:10,146 --> 00:01:11,977 I think we have a problem. 26 00:01:12,746 --> 00:01:14,099 We do? 27 00:01:15,106 --> 00:01:16,983 We can't keep seeing each other. 28 00:01:17,946 --> 00:01:19,538 Why? 29 00:01:20,026 --> 00:01:23,063 Because it's over. 30 00:01:24,506 --> 00:01:26,895 It's my parents, George. 31 00:01:27,066 --> 00:01:29,534 The differences in our religion... 32 00:01:31,066 --> 00:01:32,624 George... 33 00:01:32,786 --> 00:01:35,425 ...can you ever forgive me? 34 00:01:36,186 --> 00:01:38,256 Have you decided yet? 35 00:01:38,786 --> 00:01:41,778 Yes. I'll have the lobster. 36 00:01:46,186 --> 00:01:50,498 You know, I'm starting to think that maybe lobster isn't the way to go. 37 00:01:52,666 --> 00:01:55,783 - What? He asked you out? - We started to talk, I told him I jog... 38 00:01:55,946 --> 00:01:58,938 - ... and he put his hand on my heart. - On your heart? 39 00:01:59,226 --> 00:02:02,423 - Jerry, the man is a doctor. - Doctor. He's a podiatrist. 40 00:02:02,586 --> 00:02:04,019 So? Same thing. 41 00:02:04,186 --> 00:02:07,337 Anyone can get into podiatry school. George got into podiatry school. 42 00:02:07,586 --> 00:02:09,304 - Really? - Sure. 43 00:02:09,786 --> 00:02:11,856 - Hello. - Oh, hi. 44 00:02:12,186 --> 00:02:14,780 - Are you gonna be stopping by later? - Yes, I'll be stopping. 45 00:02:14,946 --> 00:02:17,665 - Okay. I'll see you later. - See you later. 46 00:02:19,186 --> 00:02:21,336 Well, we can't all be dating podiatrists. 47 00:02:26,706 --> 00:02:29,425 - It's over. - What? 48 00:02:29,586 --> 00:02:31,895 - How'd you get in? - Kramer. 49 00:02:32,066 --> 00:02:34,421 - What's that? - Lobster. 50 00:02:36,506 --> 00:02:38,701 Looks like a swan. 51 00:02:39,226 --> 00:02:42,104 - She says we can't go out anymore. - Why? 52 00:02:42,266 --> 00:02:44,621 Because I'm not Latvian Orthodox. 53 00:02:45,546 --> 00:02:49,175 Her parents won't let her date anyone who isn't Latvian Orthodox! 54 00:02:49,506 --> 00:02:51,861 Latvian Orthodox? 55 00:02:52,026 --> 00:02:53,698 It is lobster. 56 00:02:53,866 --> 00:02:56,539 She's limiting herself to Latvian Orthodox? 57 00:02:56,706 --> 00:02:59,061 - That's too bad. - I know. 58 00:02:59,226 --> 00:03:01,945 This was the only woman I never lied to. 59 00:03:02,106 --> 00:03:04,176 Well, that's not entirely true. 60 00:03:04,346 --> 00:03:05,825 Oh, whatever. 61 00:03:06,906 --> 00:03:09,420 - This is delicious. - Succulent. 62 00:03:10,986 --> 00:03:13,978 She knew I didn't have a job. She knew I lived at home. 63 00:03:14,146 --> 00:03:16,182 Didn't seem to bother her. 64 00:03:16,346 --> 00:03:18,576 I think I could have married this woman. 65 00:03:18,746 --> 00:03:20,498 Why don't you just ask her parents? 66 00:03:20,666 --> 00:03:23,703 I can't. I met them. They're devout. 67 00:03:23,866 --> 00:03:27,097 You know, in the cab on the way over here, I... 68 00:03:27,266 --> 00:03:29,826 I actually thought about converting. 69 00:03:30,586 --> 00:03:34,261 - To Latvian Orthodox? - Why not? What do I care? 70 00:03:36,346 --> 00:03:38,906 You know, it's not like changing toothpaste. 71 00:03:39,146 --> 00:03:41,296 I think it would be romantic. 72 00:03:42,586 --> 00:03:45,464 - Really? - Yeah. It's like Edward Vlll... 73 00:03:45,666 --> 00:03:49,215 ...abdicating the throne to marry Mrs. Simpson. 74 00:03:50,266 --> 00:03:51,824 Like King Edward. 75 00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:55,305 - Like King Edward, Jerry. - Yeah, well... 76 00:03:55,466 --> 00:03:59,379 ...King Edward didn't live in Queens with Frank and Estelle Costanza. 77 00:04:00,066 --> 00:04:02,296 You know what? I could probably do this. 78 00:04:02,466 --> 00:04:05,026 - What's the difference? - George, I was just kidding around. 79 00:04:05,186 --> 00:04:07,461 I wouldn't even tell her. I could surprise her. 80 00:04:07,626 --> 00:04:10,698 - George, I wasn't serious. - How hard could it be? 81 00:04:10,866 --> 00:04:14,097 You make a little contribution, you have a ceremony. 82 00:04:14,706 --> 00:04:16,776 I am gonna think about this. 83 00:04:16,946 --> 00:04:19,983 I am really gonna think about this. 84 00:04:21,466 --> 00:04:24,299 - I guess this one is my fault. - Oh, yeah. 85 00:04:30,906 --> 00:04:34,182 That was nice. Have you always been such a good kisser? 86 00:04:35,506 --> 00:04:37,497 I don't know. Not always. 87 00:04:37,666 --> 00:04:38,940 No? 88 00:04:39,106 --> 00:04:41,825 No, I... I had to work at it. 89 00:04:42,066 --> 00:04:45,615 As a kid, while kids were out playing, I'd be in my room practicing kissing. 90 00:04:46,586 --> 00:04:48,258 It was worth it. 91 00:04:49,226 --> 00:04:52,218 I'll be right back. 92 00:04:56,186 --> 00:04:58,416 - Where are you going? - To wash my hands. 93 00:04:58,586 --> 00:05:01,225 - They're sticky from the orange. - Meet you back here? 94 00:05:01,386 --> 00:05:03,502 - Right there. - Okay. 95 00:05:23,706 --> 00:05:25,617 Fungicide? 96 00:05:26,186 --> 00:05:27,778 Fungus? 97 00:05:30,906 --> 00:05:32,578 Fungicide. 98 00:05:34,586 --> 00:05:36,577 - I mean, what could she have? - I don't know. 99 00:05:36,746 --> 00:05:38,941 - Fungus. - Exactly. 100 00:05:40,346 --> 00:05:42,985 - So, what'd you say? - I said I was coming down... 101 00:05:43,146 --> 00:05:45,102 ...with the flu and I had to go home. 102 00:05:45,266 --> 00:05:47,621 What were you doing opening her medicine cabinet? 103 00:05:47,786 --> 00:05:52,462 I didn't open it. It was open. I just nudged it a little. 104 00:05:52,826 --> 00:05:55,294 - You were snooping. - I was not snooping. 105 00:05:55,546 --> 00:05:58,265 I did not break the seal. There was no breaking and entering. 106 00:05:58,426 --> 00:06:00,382 - I wouldn't do that. - I would. 107 00:06:01,826 --> 00:06:03,578 I always open medicine cabinets. 108 00:06:03,906 --> 00:06:06,704 Well, I trust people not to do that. 109 00:06:06,866 --> 00:06:08,504 Big mistake. 110 00:06:10,746 --> 00:06:13,135 Why don't you ask that doctor what it is. 111 00:06:13,306 --> 00:06:16,218 Now he's a doctor? Before he was a podiatrist. 112 00:06:16,466 --> 00:06:19,776 But that's what podiatrists do. They deal in fungus. 113 00:06:19,946 --> 00:06:23,382 They're knee-deep in fungus. This guy knows fungus. 114 00:06:23,706 --> 00:06:26,459 I am not going to ask him about funguses. 115 00:06:26,826 --> 00:06:28,305 Fungi. 116 00:06:29,946 --> 00:06:32,938 - What? - Fungi. 117 00:06:37,946 --> 00:06:42,303 Why do you want to accept the Latvian Orthodox faith? 118 00:06:44,626 --> 00:06:48,699 In this age of uncertainty and confusion... 119 00:06:50,066 --> 00:06:54,184 ...a man begins to ask himself certain questions. 120 00:06:54,946 --> 00:06:59,064 How can one even begin to put into words something so... 121 00:06:59,386 --> 00:07:01,138 Enigmatic? 122 00:07:01,666 --> 00:07:04,305 - Vast? - No, not vast. 123 00:07:04,986 --> 00:07:08,535 Well, whatever it is, basically you like the religion. 124 00:07:08,826 --> 00:07:11,294 - Yes. - Is there one aspect of the faith... 125 00:07:11,466 --> 00:07:13,661 ...you find particularly attractive? 126 00:07:15,866 --> 00:07:17,822 I think the hats. 127 00:07:21,186 --> 00:07:25,304 The hat conveys that solemn religious look you want in a faith. 128 00:07:25,786 --> 00:07:26,901 Very pious. 129 00:07:27,426 --> 00:07:30,896 Are you familiar with Orthodox theology? 130 00:07:31,866 --> 00:07:36,781 Well, perhaps not to the extent that you are, but... 131 00:07:37,626 --> 00:07:39,821 But I know the basic plot, yeah. 132 00:07:40,826 --> 00:07:43,420 - Plot? - Yes, you know, the flood... 133 00:07:43,586 --> 00:07:46,896 ...and the lepers and the commandments and all that. 134 00:07:47,066 --> 00:07:50,183 Well, it's obvious you are sincere in your desire. 135 00:07:50,546 --> 00:07:54,221 Oh, yes, I am, Father. Incredibly sincere. 136 00:07:54,386 --> 00:07:55,865 So... 137 00:07:56,026 --> 00:07:57,618 ...am I in? 138 00:07:59,146 --> 00:08:02,582 The first step would be to familiarize yourself... 139 00:08:02,746 --> 00:08:05,465 ...with these texts. 140 00:08:07,626 --> 00:08:11,665 You see, Father, I'm incredibly anxious to become a member. 141 00:08:12,306 --> 00:08:15,378 Don't you offer any kind of an express conversion? 142 00:08:15,546 --> 00:08:17,184 A quick change? 143 00:08:17,626 --> 00:08:18,695 Yes? 144 00:08:19,586 --> 00:08:22,976 Oh, I'm sorry. Father, there's a man waiting in the chapel. 145 00:08:23,146 --> 00:08:25,262 Well, you may attend to it, Sister. 146 00:08:25,466 --> 00:08:30,176 This is George Costanza. He is interested in joining the Church. 147 00:08:30,586 --> 00:08:32,816 Are you? Well, that's wonderful. 148 00:08:32,986 --> 00:08:35,056 - Well, good luck to you. - Thank you. 149 00:08:37,386 --> 00:08:39,217 Nice nun. 150 00:08:39,546 --> 00:08:42,265 No, no. Sister Roberta is not a nun. 151 00:08:42,466 --> 00:08:44,980 She is what we call a novice. 152 00:08:45,146 --> 00:08:48,138 She won't be taking her final vows until next Thursday. 153 00:08:49,466 --> 00:08:51,024 May I help you? 154 00:08:51,186 --> 00:08:54,542 Yeah. I'm here to pick up my friend, George Costanza. 155 00:08:55,066 --> 00:08:57,978 - Well, he's in with the Father. - Oh, yeah. 156 00:08:58,586 --> 00:09:02,101 - I'm Sister Roberta. - Oh, Kramer, yeah. It's a pleasure. 157 00:09:02,546 --> 00:09:04,138 Mine. 158 00:09:05,626 --> 00:09:09,335 I can't believe how easy it is. I'm virtually Orthodox. 159 00:09:09,506 --> 00:09:12,543 All I have to do is read a few books, memorize a few prayers... 160 00:09:12,706 --> 00:09:14,264 ...and I'm in the club. 161 00:09:14,426 --> 00:09:17,020 - That's all there is to it? - That's all there is to it. 162 00:09:17,186 --> 00:09:20,861 By Christmas Day, I will be Brother Costanza. 163 00:09:21,146 --> 00:09:25,424 And what is Brother Costanza planning on telling Mother Costanza? 164 00:09:27,866 --> 00:09:31,381 Brother Costanza will be taking the vow of silence. 165 00:09:33,706 --> 00:09:35,059 - Hey. - Hey. 166 00:09:35,386 --> 00:09:37,058 Oh, a Slinky. 167 00:09:39,866 --> 00:09:42,300 - Sister Roberta gave it to me. - Why'd she give you that? 168 00:09:42,546 --> 00:09:43,865 Well, I think she liked me. 169 00:09:45,706 --> 00:09:48,778 - What do you mean, she liked you? - Liked me. 170 00:09:49,146 --> 00:09:51,865 Kramer, they like everybody. They're friendly people. 171 00:09:52,306 --> 00:09:54,615 I think I picked up on a vibe. 172 00:09:56,146 --> 00:09:59,218 - You picked up on a vibe from a nun. - Yeah. 173 00:09:59,586 --> 00:10:01,941 Jerry, I'm telling you, I have this power... 174 00:10:02,106 --> 00:10:04,336 ...and I have no control over it. 175 00:10:04,786 --> 00:10:05,980 Yeah. All right. 176 00:10:06,466 --> 00:10:08,184 That's my phone. 177 00:10:10,746 --> 00:10:11,940 - Oh, hi. - Hi. 178 00:10:12,106 --> 00:10:14,495 Just wanted to stop by and see how you were feeling. 179 00:10:14,666 --> 00:10:16,463 A little better. 180 00:10:18,706 --> 00:10:20,776 Okay. If you need anything, let me know. 181 00:10:20,946 --> 00:10:22,220 - Okay. All right. - Okay. 182 00:10:22,386 --> 00:10:23,865 - Bye. - Bye. 183 00:10:26,186 --> 00:10:27,505 Story. 184 00:10:28,306 --> 00:10:30,536 She's subletting Carol's place for a month. 185 00:10:30,746 --> 00:10:33,306 - Yeah. She likes you. - Yeah. But there's a problem. 186 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:36,344 I found a tube of a fungicide in her medicine cabinet. 187 00:10:37,186 --> 00:10:39,746 - So? - So I don't know why she's using it. 188 00:10:39,906 --> 00:10:42,943 How do you even know it's hers? Maybe it belonged to Carol. 189 00:10:43,106 --> 00:10:45,222 - Did you see a name on the tube? - I didn't look. 190 00:10:45,386 --> 00:10:48,059 Well, take a look. It might not even belong to her. 191 00:10:48,226 --> 00:10:50,296 People always leave things in medicine cabinets. 192 00:10:50,466 --> 00:10:52,218 I got this old bottle of cough medicine. 193 00:10:52,506 --> 00:10:54,098 I still have Brylcreem. 194 00:11:05,466 --> 00:11:06,979 - Hi. - Hi. 195 00:11:07,146 --> 00:11:09,614 - Could I use your bathroom? - My bathroom? 196 00:11:12,226 --> 00:11:14,137 - You sure you don't mind? - Oh, of course not. 197 00:11:14,306 --> 00:11:16,615 People ask me medical questions all the time. 198 00:11:16,786 --> 00:11:19,459 Well, I mean, the question isn't even for me, actually. 199 00:11:19,626 --> 00:11:21,821 - It's for a friend. - Elaine, I'm used to it. 200 00:11:22,346 --> 00:11:24,735 - I'm a doctor. - Well... 201 00:11:24,906 --> 00:11:26,100 ...podiatrist. 202 00:11:30,666 --> 00:11:33,942 No, no. I'm just saying, you didn't really go to medical school. 203 00:11:34,106 --> 00:11:35,539 You went to podiatry school... 204 00:11:35,706 --> 00:11:39,381 ...which I'm sure is very gruelling in its own way. 205 00:11:39,546 --> 00:11:43,016 I went to podiatry school because I like feet. 206 00:11:43,186 --> 00:11:45,859 I chose to work with feet. 207 00:11:46,426 --> 00:11:51,136 - I like feet too. I'm just saying- - Saying what? 208 00:11:53,706 --> 00:11:56,857 - How you doing in there? - Fine. All done. 209 00:11:57,026 --> 00:12:00,018 - Just looking for the soap. - No soap? 210 00:12:00,186 --> 00:12:02,222 No, I don't see it. 211 00:12:05,026 --> 00:12:06,015 Here you go. 212 00:12:07,866 --> 00:12:10,380 George? What are you doing in there? 213 00:12:10,586 --> 00:12:12,577 What? Nothing. 214 00:12:12,746 --> 00:12:15,624 - You've been in there an hour. - You don't feel well? 215 00:12:15,786 --> 00:12:17,060 - I'm fine. - I want to know... 216 00:12:17,226 --> 00:12:19,899 - ... what you're doing in there. - Nothing. 217 00:12:20,066 --> 00:12:21,943 - George, open the door. - No. 218 00:12:22,106 --> 00:12:23,824 - Georgie. - No! 219 00:12:27,186 --> 00:12:28,665 - Hey. - Good evening. 220 00:12:28,826 --> 00:12:30,225 I hope I'm not disturbing you... 221 00:12:30,386 --> 00:12:33,219 ...but I found another toy I thought you might like. 222 00:12:40,666 --> 00:12:44,102 Okay. Latvius was the son of which apostle? 223 00:12:44,306 --> 00:12:46,695 And I'll need that in the form of a question. 224 00:12:48,066 --> 00:12:51,979 I don't know. I can't believe they're making me take this test. 225 00:12:54,386 --> 00:12:57,105 - Hey, did you talk to the doctor? - No. 226 00:12:57,306 --> 00:13:00,139 All right, the next time you see him, show him this. 227 00:13:00,426 --> 00:13:04,419 - You took her medicine. - Well, not on purpose. I was- 228 00:13:04,586 --> 00:13:06,383 I was hoping there'd be a name on the tube. 229 00:13:06,546 --> 00:13:09,697 - When are you seeing him again? - I don't know. We got into this thing... 230 00:13:09,866 --> 00:13:12,505 ...about how podiatrists aren't real doctors. 231 00:13:12,666 --> 00:13:13,860 How could you say that? 232 00:13:15,626 --> 00:13:18,345 That's your fault. You just got me thinking. 233 00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:20,224 I was merely speaking extemporaneously. 234 00:13:20,386 --> 00:13:23,583 I've got nothing against the foot. I'm pro-foot. 235 00:13:23,746 --> 00:13:25,225 Me too. 236 00:13:25,386 --> 00:13:29,061 - Do you think I should apologize? - Yes. He's a doctor. 237 00:13:30,826 --> 00:13:32,418 Wait a second. 238 00:13:34,106 --> 00:13:36,939 - What are you doing? - What does it look like I'm doing? 239 00:13:37,706 --> 00:13:39,139 "Matthew. Luke. 240 00:13:39,866 --> 00:13:41,219 Paul." 241 00:13:41,506 --> 00:13:44,304 What, you're cheating on your conversion test? 242 00:13:46,666 --> 00:13:47,815 - I told you. - What? 243 00:13:47,986 --> 00:13:49,544 - I told you she liked me. - Who? 244 00:13:49,706 --> 00:13:51,139 - Sister Roberta. - How do you know? 245 00:13:51,306 --> 00:13:53,297 She told me. She said she's never had a man... 246 00:13:53,466 --> 00:13:55,457 ...stir up all these feelings inside of her. 247 00:13:55,626 --> 00:13:58,584 She's questioning her faith. She's thinking of leaving the Church. 248 00:14:00,426 --> 00:14:02,496 All this power! 249 00:14:03,146 --> 00:14:05,216 Look what I'm doing. I'm dangerous, Jerry. 250 00:14:05,386 --> 00:14:07,775 I'm very, very dangerous! 251 00:14:15,946 --> 00:14:18,858 I must say, George, I was somewhat surprised... 252 00:14:19,026 --> 00:14:21,381 ...at the results of your conversion test. 253 00:14:22,146 --> 00:14:26,617 I don't recall having seen such an impressive performance. 254 00:14:27,466 --> 00:14:31,379 You truly must be filled with the spirit of the Lord. 255 00:14:31,706 --> 00:14:33,697 Oh, I'm full of it, Father. 256 00:14:36,186 --> 00:14:37,778 Yes? Yes? 257 00:14:39,346 --> 00:14:41,064 Yes, yes, I see. 258 00:14:41,226 --> 00:14:44,263 I'm sorry. Something has come up. 259 00:14:44,746 --> 00:14:46,657 Oh, sure. I understand. 260 00:14:48,706 --> 00:14:50,662 - Hey. - Yeah. 261 00:14:53,066 --> 00:14:55,421 - You wanted to see me, Father? - Yes. 262 00:14:55,586 --> 00:14:57,895 Please sit down. 263 00:14:59,306 --> 00:15:01,262 Sister Roberta came to see me yesterday- 264 00:15:01,426 --> 00:15:04,304 I know what this is about, Father. I didn't do anything. 265 00:15:04,466 --> 00:15:07,105 I just spoke to her innocently for just a few minutes. 266 00:15:07,306 --> 00:15:09,058 It's just that I... 267 00:15:09,226 --> 00:15:10,898 I have this power. 268 00:15:12,226 --> 00:15:13,705 Yes. 269 00:15:16,426 --> 00:15:21,659 It is a Latvian word which means "the lure of the animal." 270 00:15:22,666 --> 00:15:24,258 I don't understand. 271 00:15:24,426 --> 00:15:26,656 Women are drawn to you. 272 00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:29,943 They would give anything to be possessed by you. 273 00:15:30,106 --> 00:15:32,415 Help me, Father. Help me! 274 00:15:32,586 --> 00:15:34,019 Yes, yes. I will help you. 275 00:15:34,186 --> 00:15:36,302 Now, listen very carefully. 276 00:15:36,506 --> 00:15:40,215 I want you to buy 10 cloves of garlic... 277 00:15:40,386 --> 00:15:42,854 ...three quarts of vinegar... 278 00:15:43,026 --> 00:15:44,425 ...6 ounces... 279 00:15:45,746 --> 00:15:49,341 What is that stench? I got it. 280 00:15:54,306 --> 00:15:56,217 - Hey. - Hey, what the hell is going on? 281 00:15:56,386 --> 00:15:58,820 - It stinks. What are you doing? - I've got the kav orca. 282 00:15:58,986 --> 00:16:01,864 - The kav orca? What is that? - The lure of the animal. 283 00:16:02,026 --> 00:16:04,494 - I'm dangerous. - What is this thing around your neck? 284 00:16:04,666 --> 00:16:07,863 The priests, they're helping me. I just bathed in vinegar. 285 00:16:08,306 --> 00:16:10,376 You know, you're funkifying the whole building. 286 00:16:10,546 --> 00:16:13,379 Keep away, Jerry. Just keep away. 287 00:16:14,466 --> 00:16:16,343 Kramer! Kramer! 288 00:16:20,826 --> 00:16:22,145 George Costanza? 289 00:16:22,306 --> 00:16:23,500 Estelle's son? 290 00:16:23,946 --> 00:16:25,902 Latvian Orthodox? 291 00:16:26,066 --> 00:16:28,261 - Why are you doing this? - For a woman. 292 00:16:28,426 --> 00:16:30,382 A woman? What, are you out of your mind? 293 00:16:30,546 --> 00:16:33,697 Why can't you do anything like a normal person? 294 00:16:33,866 --> 00:16:37,939 Wait. Is this the group that goes around mutilating squirrels? 295 00:16:39,706 --> 00:16:41,139 No, it's a regular religion. 296 00:16:41,306 --> 00:16:44,139 I'm calling my lawyer. It might not be too late to get out of this. 297 00:16:44,306 --> 00:16:46,342 - I don't want to get out of it! - But, George... 298 00:16:46,506 --> 00:16:49,976 ...you don't know what you're saying. You're under their control. 299 00:16:50,146 --> 00:16:52,706 - What, they brainwashed you? - No. No. 300 00:16:52,866 --> 00:16:55,619 You're not performing any rituals in this house! 301 00:16:55,786 --> 00:16:58,061 Go back to the psychiatrist. I beg you. 302 00:16:58,226 --> 00:17:00,740 And stay away from those squirrels. 303 00:17:04,026 --> 00:17:06,335 - Oh, hi. - How you doing, Jerry? 304 00:17:06,506 --> 00:17:08,542 - Good. What's the matter? - I'm tired. 305 00:17:08,706 --> 00:17:11,698 I hardly slept last night with all the scratching. 306 00:17:11,946 --> 00:17:13,902 Bonkers was going crazy. 307 00:17:14,866 --> 00:17:16,618 - Bonkers? - My cat. 308 00:17:16,786 --> 00:17:19,300 He's got this weird sort of skin condition. 309 00:17:19,466 --> 00:17:21,821 It's some type of fungus. I couldn't find his medicine. 310 00:17:21,986 --> 00:17:24,898 - Oh, it's your cat! - What? 311 00:17:26,706 --> 00:17:27,934 Nothing. 312 00:17:32,266 --> 00:17:35,144 - Are you ready, my son? - Yes, "faddah." 313 00:17:35,306 --> 00:17:37,376 - What did you say? - What? 314 00:17:37,666 --> 00:17:39,258 I thought you said "faddah." 315 00:17:40,026 --> 00:17:42,256 I said "faddah."I... 316 00:17:42,426 --> 00:17:45,145 I meant "Father." Just a little bit nervous. 317 00:17:45,626 --> 00:17:47,696 Of course. 318 00:17:57,226 --> 00:17:58,818 How you doing? 319 00:17:58,986 --> 00:18:00,897 Get away from me, you creep. 320 00:18:01,066 --> 00:18:03,261 Yes. Yes, it worked! 321 00:18:03,426 --> 00:18:06,304 Sister Roberta. I still got time to catch her. 322 00:18:22,786 --> 00:18:23,980 I gotta get there. 323 00:18:38,186 --> 00:18:41,064 Congratulations, George. 324 00:18:41,466 --> 00:18:43,297 Welcome to the faith. 325 00:18:43,466 --> 00:18:47,459 Sister Roberta, would you please offer the final benediction? 326 00:18:51,746 --> 00:18:53,418 I can't. 327 00:18:53,586 --> 00:18:56,498 I'm sorry. It's a beautiful religion... 328 00:18:56,666 --> 00:18:58,145 ...but I am not worthy of it. 329 00:18:59,186 --> 00:19:00,619 I've found something else. 330 00:19:04,946 --> 00:19:06,345 Him. 331 00:19:13,426 --> 00:19:18,022 You know, because I love the foot. I'm a big fan of the foot. 332 00:19:18,186 --> 00:19:20,097 Well, it's my fault. I got a little defensive. 333 00:19:20,266 --> 00:19:23,258 And that pinkie toe. Come on! 334 00:19:23,426 --> 00:19:26,099 How adorable is the pinkie toe? 335 00:19:26,266 --> 00:19:27,585 It's my favourite toe. 336 00:19:27,746 --> 00:19:30,021 Let's face it. You get a bunion, where you going? 337 00:19:30,186 --> 00:19:34,225 - You're not going to the ear guy. - No, you're not. 338 00:19:40,666 --> 00:19:43,419 Would you excuse me? I'll be right back. 339 00:19:44,306 --> 00:19:47,298 - Where's the bathroom? - It's right down here to the left. 340 00:19:48,106 --> 00:19:49,858 I will meet you right back here? 341 00:19:50,706 --> 00:19:54,335 Elaine, it's her cat. Her cat has the fungus. 342 00:19:54,506 --> 00:19:55,780 So I need the tube back. 343 00:20:00,026 --> 00:20:01,505 Fungicide? 344 00:20:01,746 --> 00:20:03,418 Fungus? 345 00:20:06,106 --> 00:20:09,257 Something's wrong. I don't feel the same lure. 346 00:20:10,186 --> 00:20:11,539 You don't? 347 00:20:11,706 --> 00:20:12,934 What have I-? 348 00:20:13,146 --> 00:20:15,944 I must return to the Church. 349 00:20:16,586 --> 00:20:19,020 By the way, you really need to take a bath. You stink. 350 00:20:19,186 --> 00:20:21,416 Yeah, yeah. Yeah. 351 00:20:21,586 --> 00:20:23,304 Once you put medicine in your cabinet... 352 00:20:23,466 --> 00:20:26,299 ...you're never using it again. Medicine you use is on the sink. 353 00:20:26,466 --> 00:20:30,015 It's not really a medicine cabinet. It's really like an ointment museum. 354 00:20:30,186 --> 00:20:32,905 It's like, "Here's a salve from 1983... 355 00:20:33,106 --> 00:20:36,416 ...some cream from the '7 Os." But you want to keep it private. 356 00:20:36,586 --> 00:20:39,464 A medicine cabinet is a place that reveals our weaknesses... 357 00:20:39,626 --> 00:20:42,504 ...and can throw off the balance between people that are going out. 358 00:20:42,666 --> 00:20:45,021 Somebody peeks in there, "Oh, I see Mr. Perfect needs... 359 00:20:45,186 --> 00:20:47,177 ...tough actin' Tinactin. 360 00:20:49,226 --> 00:20:53,697 Well, I guess I'll be calling the shots in this relationship from now on." 361 00:21:02,706 --> 00:21:06,699 - You did that for me? - Well, I didn't do it for my mother. 362 00:21:07,186 --> 00:21:09,575 - I'm really flattered. - Yeah. 363 00:21:10,266 --> 00:21:13,895 But I just don't feel ready to make a commitment yet. 364 00:21:14,066 --> 00:21:15,897 Maybe when I get back from Latvia. 365 00:21:19,746 --> 00:21:21,259 Latvia? 366 00:21:21,426 --> 00:21:24,463 Yes. I'm going to stay with some relatives there for a year. 367 00:21:24,626 --> 00:21:26,378 Isn't it great? 368 00:21:27,906 --> 00:21:30,022 Enjoy. Enjoy. 369 00:21:30,746 --> 00:21:33,977 Oh, George. You are so sweet. 370 00:21:34,186 --> 00:21:35,460 Don't ever change. 371 00:21:39,346 --> 00:21:41,985 I'd like a doggy bag for this, please. 372 00:21:48,626 --> 00:21:50,617 Subtitles by SDl Media Group