1
00:00:03,889 --> 00:00:06,039
What's supposed to be
so attractive about fur?
2
00:00:06,289 --> 00:00:08,564
Why does a man
wanna see a woman in fur?
3
00:00:08,729 --> 00:00:11,527
Men want women with shaved legs
and armpits, plucked eyebrows.
4
00:00:11,689 --> 00:00:14,283
Then before we go out,
we dress them up like a bear?
5
00:00:14,849 --> 00:00:16,680
To me, the only reason to wear fur...
6
00:00:16,849 --> 00:00:19,647
...would be if you were trying
to sneak up on another animal.
7
00:00:19,809 --> 00:00:22,198
You ever see those tribal hunters
wearing the fur...
8
00:00:22,369 --> 00:00:25,918
...with the other animal's head
on top of their head, you know?
9
00:00:26,089 --> 00:00:29,126
I'm sure there's a moose looking at
that going, "Yeah. Looks good.
10
00:00:29,289 --> 00:00:33,202
Yeah. I'm gonna turn my back
on this goofball with the extra head...
11
00:00:33,369 --> 00:00:35,007
...because nothing's
fishy there.
12
00:00:35,169 --> 00:00:36,966
I'll just keep drinking
from the stream.
13
00:00:37,129 --> 00:00:40,405
I've seen a lot of two-headed
tigers with knees."
14
00:00:43,889 --> 00:00:46,528
So I am actually gonna have
a secretary.
15
00:00:46,689 --> 00:00:48,839
- I get to do the interview.
- It's incredible.
16
00:00:49,009 --> 00:00:50,806
You were taking messages
for your mother.
17
00:00:50,969 --> 00:00:53,358
And now someone's gonna be
taking messages for me.
18
00:00:53,529 --> 00:00:55,804
From your mother.
19
00:00:55,969 --> 00:00:58,119
So this woman you plan on hiring...
20
00:00:58,289 --> 00:01:00,598
...is she gonna be
in the spokesmodel category?
21
00:01:01,489 --> 00:01:03,320
Sure, I could go the tomato route...
22
00:01:03,489 --> 00:01:05,559
...but I've given this
a lot of thought, Jerry.
23
00:01:05,729 --> 00:01:08,289
All that frustration,
I'll never get any work done.
24
00:01:08,449 --> 00:01:10,280
So I'm doing a complete 360.
25
00:01:10,449 --> 00:01:12,724
I'm going for total
efficiency and ability.
26
00:01:12,889 --> 00:01:14,083
That's a 180, George.
27
00:01:14,249 --> 00:01:15,648
Whatever.
28
00:01:16,209 --> 00:01:17,722
- Hi, Willie.
- Hey, Jerry.
29
00:01:17,889 --> 00:01:19,083
I got this stuff...
30
00:01:19,249 --> 00:01:22,047
- ... and my mother's fur for storage.
- What are you doing with it?
31
00:01:22,209 --> 00:01:24,769
She keeps it with me
for when she comes up from Florida.
32
00:01:24,929 --> 00:01:26,123
- Hi.
- Hi.
33
00:01:26,289 --> 00:01:27,881
Jerry, you know my wife, Donna.
34
00:01:28,049 --> 00:01:29,880
Yeah. That's why I said "hi."
35
00:01:31,089 --> 00:01:33,045
Hey, nice jacket.
36
00:01:33,209 --> 00:01:34,528
Thanks. Houndstooth.
37
00:01:34,889 --> 00:01:36,368
This is a beauty.
38
00:01:36,529 --> 00:01:39,441
- Great cut. It's probably very flattering.
- Oh, yes.
39
00:01:39,609 --> 00:01:42,043
It really accentuates
my bust line.
40
00:01:42,809 --> 00:01:44,401
Well, I type about
90 words a minute.
41
00:01:44,569 --> 00:01:47,606
I'm completely well-versed in all
the IBM and Macintosh programs.
42
00:01:47,769 --> 00:01:50,841
Well, Miss Coggins, you're
obviously qualified for the job.
43
00:01:51,009 --> 00:01:54,046
You have all the necessary skills
and experience...
44
00:01:54,209 --> 00:01:56,723
...but you're extremely attractive.
You're gorgeous.
45
00:01:56,889 --> 00:01:59,608
I'm looking at you,
I can't even remember my name.
46
00:02:00,289 --> 00:02:03,725
So I'm afraid this is not
gonna work out. Thanks for coming.
47
00:02:03,889 --> 00:02:05,845
You're luscious.
You're ravishing.
48
00:02:06,009 --> 00:02:09,319
I would give up red meat just to get
a glimpse of you in a bra.
49
00:02:09,489 --> 00:02:11,639
I'm terribly sorry. Terribly sorry.
50
00:02:11,969 --> 00:02:13,880
As you can see, my references
are impeccable.
51
00:02:14,049 --> 00:02:15,767
I think I'd be a real asset here.
52
00:02:15,929 --> 00:02:17,965
My only concern is,
I take care of my mother.
53
00:02:18,129 --> 00:02:20,085
So will there be many late nights?
54
00:02:20,609 --> 00:02:21,883
I can't imagine.
55
00:02:23,289 --> 00:02:25,564
Okay. So Barneys is having
this huge sale.
56
00:02:25,729 --> 00:02:27,162
I try this dress on.
57
00:02:27,329 --> 00:02:29,126
Stunning. Stunning.
58
00:02:29,289 --> 00:02:32,281
I couldn't take my eyes off myself.
59
00:02:32,449 --> 00:02:34,838
- Yeah?
- Okay. So then I put it on at home...
60
00:02:35,009 --> 00:02:37,523
...it looks like I'm carrying twins.
61
00:02:37,849 --> 00:02:41,080
So you're saying, store, hotsy-totsy,
Home, hotsy-notsy.
62
00:02:42,089 --> 00:02:44,398
Exactly.
Anyway, I gotta go there and return it.
63
00:02:44,569 --> 00:02:46,161
I thought we were going
to the movies.
64
00:02:46,329 --> 00:02:49,241
All right. I'll try it on again.
You tell me what you think.
65
00:02:50,089 --> 00:02:51,488
- Hey, hey.
- Hey, George.
66
00:02:51,649 --> 00:02:53,082
Hey, Elaine.
67
00:02:53,249 --> 00:02:56,525
I am telling you, Jerry,
having a secretary is incredible.
68
00:02:56,689 --> 00:02:58,486
Don't know why I didn't
have one before.
69
00:02:58,649 --> 00:03:00,605
Because you didn't have a job?
70
00:03:02,129 --> 00:03:03,323
Perhaps.
71
00:03:03,489 --> 00:03:05,241
I walk in, everything is organized.
72
00:03:05,409 --> 00:03:06,603
Messages, appointments.
73
00:03:06,769 --> 00:03:10,159
I can't tell you how proud I am
of myself for going with Ada.
74
00:03:10,329 --> 00:03:11,728
A lesser man would've crumbled.
75
00:03:11,889 --> 00:03:15,245
They would've gone for the dish and
the sure-fire sexual harassment suit.
76
00:03:20,609 --> 00:03:22,520
- It's a little-
- All right.
77
00:03:22,689 --> 00:03:23,963
You answered it right there.
78
00:03:24,129 --> 00:03:25,562
You got no waist in that thing.
79
00:03:25,729 --> 00:03:29,199
And your arms look like something
hanging in a kosher deli.
80
00:03:30,049 --> 00:03:32,609
I said, all right.
81
00:03:32,769 --> 00:03:34,805
- Why'd you buy it for?
- Why did I buy it?
82
00:03:34,969 --> 00:03:37,722
Because in the mirror at Barneys,
I looked fabulous.
83
00:03:37,889 --> 00:03:39,561
This woman who was just
walking by...
84
00:03:39,729 --> 00:03:42,368
...said I looked like Demi Moore
in Indecent Proposal.
85
00:03:42,529 --> 00:03:44,281
How fast was she walking?
86
00:03:46,049 --> 00:03:47,198
"Demi"?
87
00:03:47,369 --> 00:03:49,007
I thought it was "Demi."
88
00:03:49,409 --> 00:03:50,842
No, I think it's "Demi."
89
00:03:51,009 --> 00:03:52,442
Really?
90
00:03:52,609 --> 00:03:55,521
I never heard of
a "semi"tractor-trailer.
91
00:03:58,009 --> 00:03:59,158
Wait a minute.
92
00:03:59,329 --> 00:04:01,399
Wait a minute.
I know what's going on here.
93
00:04:01,569 --> 00:04:03,958
- Skinny mirrors.
- What?
94
00:04:04,129 --> 00:04:06,359
Skinny mirrors.
Barneys has skinny mirrors.
95
00:04:06,529 --> 00:04:08,360
They make you look
10 pounds lighter.
96
00:04:08,529 --> 00:04:10,008
Oh, you're crazy.
97
00:04:10,169 --> 00:04:11,318
Am I?
98
00:04:11,489 --> 00:04:13,798
Do you think I would've
bought this dress...
99
00:04:13,969 --> 00:04:16,119
...if I looked like this at Barneys?
100
00:04:16,289 --> 00:04:18,359
You know, I think
she may have something.
101
00:04:21,969 --> 00:04:23,448
What are you all dressed up for?
102
00:04:23,609 --> 00:04:25,565
I'm returning this dress to Barneys.
103
00:04:25,729 --> 00:04:27,162
Good idea.
104
00:04:28,009 --> 00:04:29,647
Do it tomorrow.
We'll go to the movies.
105
00:04:29,809 --> 00:04:31,322
- Okay.
- Hey, if you're going...
106
00:04:31,489 --> 00:04:34,003
...maybe you can pick me up
some super-hydrating-
107
00:04:34,169 --> 00:04:37,559
It's a total-protection moisturizer
with UVA. Yeah.
108
00:04:38,129 --> 00:04:41,121
- Moisturizer? That's girl stuff.
- No. Look, I'll tell you what.
109
00:04:41,289 --> 00:04:42,847
- They're having a sale, right?
- Yeah.
110
00:04:43,009 --> 00:04:44,840
I'll meet you there.
We'll have lunch.
111
00:04:45,409 --> 00:04:47,877
- Well, we could-
- Yeah, we'll get to know each other.
112
00:04:48,049 --> 00:04:50,040
We never get to spend
any time together.
113
00:04:50,209 --> 00:04:53,440
Oh, sure. We have
our little group here, but...
114
00:04:55,689 --> 00:04:58,328
And then, assuming
the strike is resolved...
115
00:04:58,489 --> 00:05:01,003
...on April 14th,
we play the Angels.
116
00:05:01,169 --> 00:05:03,683
So let's clear a floor
at the Anaheim Hotel.
117
00:05:03,849 --> 00:05:06,682
Anaheim Hotel.
You may wanna reconsider.
118
00:05:06,849 --> 00:05:10,603
I believe they only have room service
until 10 p. m, then it's only finger foods.
119
00:05:12,329 --> 00:05:13,887
Ada, you're a wonder.
120
00:05:14,369 --> 00:05:17,645
Okay. Now, I projected those figures
for you regarding the switch...
121
00:05:17,809 --> 00:05:19,481
...to canola oil for stadium popcorn.
122
00:05:19,649 --> 00:05:22,209
Surprisingly, it'll only cost
half a cent more per bag...
123
00:05:22,369 --> 00:05:23,722
...so it's definitely doable.
124
00:05:24,129 --> 00:05:27,963
Ada, I have to tell you, I have
never met anybody so efficient.
125
00:05:28,129 --> 00:05:30,199
Well, thank you. I'm flattered.
126
00:05:31,649 --> 00:05:34,163
You're just a marvel of organization.
127
00:05:34,329 --> 00:05:37,241
Well, I'm just doing my job.
128
00:05:38,209 --> 00:05:40,165
It's like-
I'm thinking of something...
129
00:05:40,329 --> 00:05:42,206
...and you're one step ahead of me.
130
00:05:42,369 --> 00:05:44,485
What can I say? I'm...
131
00:05:44,649 --> 00:05:47,004
I'm good at what I do.
132
00:05:48,609 --> 00:05:50,201
Do you...?
133
00:05:50,849 --> 00:05:52,965
Do you know what I'm...
134
00:05:53,129 --> 00:05:56,758
...thinking about now?
135
00:05:57,049 --> 00:05:59,199
Yes. I think I do.
136
00:06:00,089 --> 00:06:01,522
Is it...
137
00:06:03,169 --> 00:06:04,761
...doable?
138
00:06:05,449 --> 00:06:07,007
It's definitely doable.
139
00:06:14,289 --> 00:06:16,280
Well, that was the worst.
140
00:06:16,449 --> 00:06:18,565
I can't believe they made
the wife the killer.
141
00:06:18,729 --> 00:06:20,162
- Give me a break.
- Hey.
142
00:06:20,329 --> 00:06:22,365
Give us a break.
We haven't seen it yet.
143
00:06:22,529 --> 00:06:24,520
- Thanks a lot, bigmouth.
- Yeah.
144
00:06:24,689 --> 00:06:26,122
- Got a pen?
- Yeah. I think I do.
145
00:06:26,529 --> 00:06:28,008
I need something to write on.
146
00:06:28,169 --> 00:06:29,966
Well, all I got is
my dry-cleaning stub.
147
00:06:30,129 --> 00:06:31,323
I just met Uma Thurman.
148
00:06:31,489 --> 00:06:34,128
She's giving me her telephone
number. Uma, Jerry. Uma.
149
00:06:34,289 --> 00:06:36,757
- Uma Thurman? Really?
- How'd you manage that?
150
00:06:36,929 --> 00:06:39,079
Yeah. Well-
I don't have any time to talk now.
151
00:06:39,889 --> 00:06:42,323
He's got the kavorca.
152
00:06:43,809 --> 00:06:46,323
- Hey, isn't that Willie, my dry cleaner?
- Where?
153
00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:48,286
He just went in.
154
00:06:48,649 --> 00:06:49,843
You know, I-
155
00:06:50,009 --> 00:06:53,081
I think he was wearing
my houndstooth jacket.
156
00:06:53,649 --> 00:06:56,117
What would he be doing
wearing your jacket?
157
00:06:56,289 --> 00:06:59,087
It looked just like the jacket
I brought in to be dry-cleaned.
158
00:06:59,249 --> 00:07:00,762
He complimented me on it.
159
00:07:00,929 --> 00:07:02,726
- Are you sure?
- I got it.
160
00:07:02,889 --> 00:07:04,845
Uma, Uma, Uma.
161
00:07:05,009 --> 00:07:06,601
- You are amazing.
- Yeah.
162
00:07:06,769 --> 00:07:09,363
All right. Taxi's on me.
163
00:07:13,689 --> 00:07:16,249
No, no, no. A better way
to reach the bra...
164
00:07:16,409 --> 00:07:19,606
...would be to undo the jacket
then go around the back of the shirt.
165
00:07:20,809 --> 00:07:22,037
Ada, you're incredible.
166
00:07:28,089 --> 00:07:29,761
Here. I wanna show you something.
167
00:07:29,929 --> 00:07:31,806
Hand me that pillow.
168
00:07:32,129 --> 00:07:33,482
Here.
169
00:07:34,689 --> 00:07:36,088
What?
170
00:07:36,609 --> 00:07:39,328
Oh, my God.
171
00:07:39,489 --> 00:07:41,127
Mr. Costanza.
172
00:07:41,289 --> 00:07:42,847
Ada.
173
00:07:44,329 --> 00:07:47,446
- I'm giving you a raise!
- Yes!
174
00:07:49,129 --> 00:07:51,802
So you're having sex,
then all of a sudden you blurt out:
175
00:07:51,969 --> 00:07:54,688
"I'm giving you a raise"?
176
00:07:55,009 --> 00:07:56,283
Yeah.
177
00:07:57,129 --> 00:07:58,608
Just a quick sidebar here.
178
00:07:58,769 --> 00:08:00,680
Are you in any way
authorized to give raises?
179
00:08:00,849 --> 00:08:03,079
- Not that I'm aware of.
- No.
180
00:08:03,889 --> 00:08:07,006
So you're so grateful to have sex,
you'll shout out anything...
181
00:08:07,169 --> 00:08:08,682
...that comes into your head.
182
00:08:08,849 --> 00:08:10,521
I didn't think ahead.
183
00:08:10,689 --> 00:08:12,759
Maybe she'll just think
it was bawdy talk.
184
00:08:13,249 --> 00:08:15,638
I didn't say any other bawdy things.
185
00:08:16,209 --> 00:08:19,360
Maybe you could have sex
with her again and then take it back.
186
00:08:20,289 --> 00:08:22,359
All right. You're not
any help at all here.
187
00:08:22,529 --> 00:08:24,247
I don't know the point
of talking to you.
188
00:08:24,409 --> 00:08:26,525
All right, all right, I'm sorry.
189
00:08:26,689 --> 00:08:30,318
Yeah. Well, the only thing I can do
is to go to George Steinbrenner...
190
00:08:30,489 --> 00:08:32,286
...and tell him he has
to give her a raise.
191
00:08:32,449 --> 00:08:34,519
- How long has she been there?
- Three days.
192
00:08:35,009 --> 00:08:37,125
- It's almost a week.
- Yeah.
193
00:08:40,929 --> 00:08:42,806
Oh, my God.
194
00:08:42,969 --> 00:08:46,166
- What?
- It's a movie stub from the 9:30 show.
195
00:08:46,329 --> 00:08:50,038
George, I think Willie the dry cleaner's
been wearing my clothes.
196
00:08:54,049 --> 00:08:56,563
These mirrors are skinny mirrors.
197
00:08:56,729 --> 00:08:59,323
This is false...
198
00:08:59,609 --> 00:09:01,645
...reflecting.
199
00:09:01,849 --> 00:09:05,728
And I think that the department of...
200
00:09:05,889 --> 00:09:07,527
...you know, whatever...
201
00:09:07,689 --> 00:09:11,443
...would be very interested
to know what's going on here.
202
00:09:11,769 --> 00:09:15,444
Well, we're more than happy
to exchange it for something else.
203
00:09:15,609 --> 00:09:17,361
Okay. Fine.
204
00:09:17,529 --> 00:09:19,520
I did like that little
Calvin Klein number...
205
00:09:19,689 --> 00:09:21,520
...right by the elevator,
with the little-
206
00:09:21,689 --> 00:09:24,920
- I'll bring it to your dressing room.
- Okay. Thanks so much.
207
00:09:26,209 --> 00:09:27,801
What are you all dressed up for?
208
00:09:27,969 --> 00:09:30,324
Elaine, when you're shopping
on Madison Avenue...
209
00:09:30,489 --> 00:09:32,525
...you don't wanna skimp
on the swank.
210
00:09:33,009 --> 00:09:34,442
I like your little bag.
211
00:09:34,609 --> 00:09:37,169
Oh, yeah. Hey, look at this.
212
00:09:37,329 --> 00:09:42,039
This is a super-hydrating,
triple-action moisturizer, huh?
213
00:09:42,209 --> 00:09:44,120
Wait till that Uma smells this UVA.
214
00:09:46,729 --> 00:09:49,880
- Hey, Kramer.
- Hey, Bania. What's happening?
215
00:09:50,289 --> 00:09:53,486
I'm looking for a new suit,
but I can't find anything I like.
216
00:09:53,809 --> 00:09:56,642
- That's a nice suit.
- Well, thank you.
217
00:09:56,809 --> 00:09:58,401
- Did you get that here?
- No, no, no.
218
00:09:58,569 --> 00:10:00,764
This is vintage.
They don't make this anymore.
219
00:10:00,929 --> 00:10:02,681
- You're telling me.
- I sure am.
220
00:10:03,009 --> 00:10:04,158
It's hard to find pants-
221
00:10:04,329 --> 00:10:06,320
- That don't make you high-waisted?
- Yes.
222
00:10:06,489 --> 00:10:08,081
- Me too.
- What size are you?
223
00:10:08,809 --> 00:10:11,039
- Forty-two.
- Forty-two? That's what I am now.
224
00:10:11,209 --> 00:10:13,086
I've been working out. I'm huge.
225
00:10:15,609 --> 00:10:16,928
How'd you like to sell it?
226
00:10:17,409 --> 00:10:18,842
Make me an offer.
227
00:10:19,249 --> 00:10:21,843
- One hundred bucks.
- Surely you jest.
228
00:10:22,769 --> 00:10:24,202
One seventy-five?
229
00:10:24,369 --> 00:10:25,768
Look at the stitching.
230
00:10:25,929 --> 00:10:28,727
This is old-world craftsmanship.
231
00:10:28,969 --> 00:10:30,402
- Three hundred dollars.
- Sold.
232
00:10:30,569 --> 00:10:33,367
- Follow me into the dressing room.
- You'll throw the shirt in?
233
00:10:33,529 --> 00:10:35,440
Bania, you're killing me.
234
00:10:35,769 --> 00:10:37,407
Hey, that's the women's
dressing room.
235
00:10:37,569 --> 00:10:39,480
There's nothing there
I haven't seen before.
236
00:10:46,809 --> 00:10:48,561
Mr. Steinbrenner?
237
00:10:49,009 --> 00:10:50,328
Can I talk to you for a second?
238
00:10:50,489 --> 00:10:52,207
Yes. Yes, George.
Can you talk to me?
239
00:10:52,369 --> 00:10:54,280
Of course.
I'm a very accessible man.
240
00:10:54,449 --> 00:10:57,088
I wanna say you're doing great
on that canola-oil stuff.
241
00:10:57,249 --> 00:10:59,046
Well, you know,
to be honest, sir, my-
242
00:10:59,209 --> 00:11:01,359
My new secretary, Ada,
came up with that one.
243
00:11:01,529 --> 00:11:03,918
Ada. Ada. I like that name, George.
244
00:11:04,089 --> 00:11:05,681
She supports her whole family.
245
00:11:05,849 --> 00:11:07,407
- Is that a fact, George?
- Yes.
246
00:11:07,569 --> 00:11:09,241
In fact, her mom's in the hospital.
247
00:11:09,409 --> 00:11:11,479
It's some kind of a diverticulitis.
248
00:11:11,649 --> 00:11:15,005
I had a bout of that myself one time,
knocked me right on my ass.
249
00:11:15,169 --> 00:11:17,524
She can't even afford
to go out to lunch. She-
250
00:11:17,689 --> 00:11:19,520
She's been eating
in school cafeterias.
251
00:11:19,689 --> 00:11:22,044
She pretends to be a teacher.
It's pathetic.
252
00:11:22,209 --> 00:11:23,801
What does that cost?
Two and a quarter?
253
00:11:23,969 --> 00:11:27,644
You know, I was just thinking
that she could really use a raise.
254
00:11:27,809 --> 00:11:30,198
She'd be better off making
a sandwich and bringing it.
255
00:11:30,369 --> 00:11:31,722
Hello?
256
00:11:31,889 --> 00:11:33,800
George, will you excuse me?
257
00:11:41,129 --> 00:11:42,847
Kramer. What are you doing?
258
00:11:43,009 --> 00:11:45,125
Listen, I need you
to get me some clothes.
259
00:11:45,289 --> 00:11:46,802
- What?
- Yeah. I just sold my suit...
260
00:11:46,969 --> 00:11:48,448
...to Bania for a cool 300.
261
00:11:48,969 --> 00:11:50,197
So go buy a new one.
262
00:11:50,369 --> 00:11:52,883
At this place?
It would destroy my profit margin.
263
00:11:53,249 --> 00:11:55,444
- So?
- Listen, do me a favour. Just call Jerry.
264
00:11:55,609 --> 00:11:57,725
Tell him to bring me some clothes.
265
00:12:05,249 --> 00:12:08,161
- Hello, Willie.
- Hey, Jerry.
266
00:12:08,329 --> 00:12:10,001
- You're dropping off.
- No...
267
00:12:10,169 --> 00:12:13,559
...but seen any good movies lately?
268
00:12:14,129 --> 00:12:16,279
- You came by to ask that?
- Yeah.
269
00:12:16,449 --> 00:12:18,121
Specifically, 9:30 shows.
270
00:12:18,289 --> 00:12:21,884
Seen any good 9:30 shows
at the Paragon, Willie?
271
00:12:22,049 --> 00:12:23,767
- What are you getting at?
- I saw you...
272
00:12:23,929 --> 00:12:26,124
...stepping out
with my houndstooth jacket.
273
00:12:26,289 --> 00:12:29,565
Jerry, that's a breach
of the dry cleaners' code.
274
00:12:29,729 --> 00:12:33,085
You need a code to tell you
not to wear people's clothes?
275
00:12:33,249 --> 00:12:35,638
I wasn't wearing your jacket.
276
00:12:35,809 --> 00:12:39,165
- Jerry, you're imagining things.
- Yeah.
277
00:12:39,329 --> 00:12:41,365
Am I imagining this?
278
00:12:42,809 --> 00:12:44,606
Found that little cutie in the pocket.
279
00:12:44,769 --> 00:12:46,282
- Jerry-
- Yeah. Well, now that...
280
00:12:46,449 --> 00:12:49,043
...we understand each other,
I'll take my business elsewhere.
281
00:12:49,209 --> 00:12:52,007
- I want my mother's fur coat back too.
- Jerry, come on.
282
00:12:52,169 --> 00:12:54,763
- Now.
- Now?
283
00:13:01,329 --> 00:13:03,160
Yeah. I want that coat.
284
00:13:03,329 --> 00:13:05,923
- Well-
- Where's the ticket?
285
00:13:07,009 --> 00:13:08,647
- Kramer.
- Wait a minute.
286
00:13:08,809 --> 00:13:11,960
You mean to tell me that
you don't have a ticket for the coat?
287
00:13:12,129 --> 00:13:13,642
No. Not on me.
288
00:13:13,929 --> 00:13:16,124
Well, I need to see that ticket.
289
00:13:16,289 --> 00:13:17,961
Why? I've gotten cleaning without it.
290
00:13:18,129 --> 00:13:19,960
Yeah, but this is different.
291
00:13:20,129 --> 00:13:23,007
Those fur-storage warehouses
are huge.
292
00:13:23,169 --> 00:13:25,967
You can't get anything
without a number.
293
00:13:26,889 --> 00:13:28,925
All right. I'll be back.
294
00:13:32,089 --> 00:13:35,001
Yeah. It looks good here,
but what does that mean?
295
00:13:35,729 --> 00:13:37,959
So do you want it?
296
00:13:38,129 --> 00:13:40,279
I don't know. I have to think about it.
297
00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:44,441
I need a non-partisan mirror.
298
00:13:54,329 --> 00:13:56,126
I can't thank you enough,
Mr. Costanza.
299
00:13:56,289 --> 00:13:59,281
- I'm so grateful.
- Yes. Well...
300
00:13:59,449 --> 00:14:01,280
...I sat down with Mr. Steinbrenner.
301
00:14:01,449 --> 00:14:03,201
I told him you've
been doing great work.
302
00:14:03,369 --> 00:14:05,963
I said you deserved a raise,
and if you didn't get it...
303
00:14:06,129 --> 00:14:08,597
...that I was leaving.
304
00:14:09,049 --> 00:14:10,482
It was just so generous.
305
00:14:10,649 --> 00:14:12,844
Don't worry about it.
He's got plenty of money.
306
00:14:13,009 --> 00:14:16,445
Oh, I know, but 25,000.
307
00:14:19,649 --> 00:14:23,847
- So you got a $25,000-a-year raise?
- Yes.
308
00:14:24,129 --> 00:14:27,087
- I tell you, Mr. Steinbrenner-
- You're making more than I am.
309
00:14:27,249 --> 00:14:29,888
- I am?
- A secretary cannot make more...
310
00:14:30,049 --> 00:14:33,564
- ... than her boss.
- Well, apparently they can.
311
00:14:46,849 --> 00:14:48,043
Oh, this is insanity.
312
00:14:48,209 --> 00:14:50,404
I'm not this hip-y.
313
00:14:51,009 --> 00:14:52,920
Hey. Hey, what do you think of this?
314
00:14:53,729 --> 00:14:55,959
You'll never pull it off.
315
00:14:56,609 --> 00:14:58,167
Hey. What's going on in there?
316
00:14:58,329 --> 00:15:01,719
Excuse me. Could you tell me where I
could find women's moisturizer lotions?
317
00:15:02,329 --> 00:15:05,719
This woman's been in there
for over an hour.
318
00:15:08,809 --> 00:15:10,925
Excuse me, miss.
Is everything okay in there?
319
00:15:11,089 --> 00:15:12,363
Yeah.
320
00:15:16,169 --> 00:15:19,479
- Kramer?
- Jerry. You got my clothes?
321
00:15:20,009 --> 00:15:22,603
- What clothes?
- Didn't Elaine call you?
322
00:15:22,769 --> 00:15:24,122
No.
323
00:15:24,329 --> 00:15:25,921
Well, what are you doing here?
324
00:15:26,089 --> 00:15:29,286
What am I doing here?
You're in the women's dressing room.
325
00:15:29,449 --> 00:15:32,282
I need that ticket stub back so I can
get my mom's fur coat out.
326
00:15:32,449 --> 00:15:35,327
The stub. Yeah.
I left it in my- My pants.
327
00:15:35,489 --> 00:15:39,198
- Where are your pants?
- Well, I sold them to Bania.
328
00:15:39,969 --> 00:15:43,086
What? You sold your pants
to Bania? Let me in.
329
00:15:45,289 --> 00:15:47,280
Why'd you sell your pants to Bania?
330
00:15:47,449 --> 00:15:49,565
I had Uma Thurman's number
written on that stub.
331
00:15:49,729 --> 00:15:50,957
I lost Uma's number.
332
00:15:52,129 --> 00:15:55,007
- Where are your clothes?
- I told you, I sold them to Bania.
333
00:15:55,569 --> 00:15:57,560
- You mean, what you were wearing?
- Yeah.
334
00:15:57,729 --> 00:15:59,287
How'd you expect
to get out of here?
335
00:15:59,569 --> 00:16:01,844
Well, I didn't think ahead.
336
00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:11,160
This- This isn't gonna work for me.
337
00:16:11,329 --> 00:16:13,559
So if you could show me
something else.
338
00:16:14,009 --> 00:16:15,158
No.
339
00:16:16,929 --> 00:16:19,648
- No?
- No. Because you're taking that one.
340
00:16:20,369 --> 00:16:22,837
- I am?
- Yes. You wore it outside.
341
00:16:24,449 --> 00:16:26,326
That's preposterous.
342
00:16:26,489 --> 00:16:31,165
Well, I suppose that salt stain
came from all the snow in the store.
343
00:16:33,489 --> 00:16:35,480
Shall I wrap it,
or will you wear it out?
344
00:16:36,209 --> 00:16:38,359
No. You can wrap it.
345
00:16:42,609 --> 00:16:45,077
- Kramer, you still in there?
- Elaine?
346
00:16:45,689 --> 00:16:47,202
Jerry?
347
00:16:47,369 --> 00:16:49,087
- Elaine, where's Kramer?
- Bania?
348
00:16:49,249 --> 00:16:51,126
- Kramer?
- I'm going out.
349
00:16:51,849 --> 00:16:53,282
- Jerry.
- Bania.
350
00:16:53,449 --> 00:16:55,519
Kramer, I want my money back
for this suit.
351
00:16:55,689 --> 00:16:57,725
Your nancy-boy cream leaked
all over the pockets.
352
00:16:57,889 --> 00:17:00,119
- Suit's ruined.
- You're not getting any money back.
353
00:17:00,289 --> 00:17:02,928
- Jerry, come back.
- Excuse me.
354
00:17:04,289 --> 00:17:06,359
- Uma's number's on that ticket.
- Never mind Uma.
355
00:17:06,529 --> 00:17:08,406
I need that ticket
to get my mother's coat.
356
00:17:08,569 --> 00:17:10,048
Why not just give him the money?
357
00:17:10,209 --> 00:17:14,919
I'm not giving him $300 now for a suit
with moisturizer cream all over it.
358
00:17:15,809 --> 00:17:17,288
- I got an idea.
- What?
359
00:17:17,449 --> 00:17:19,963
I can't believe I'm gonna do this.
360
00:17:21,249 --> 00:17:22,602
Can I talk to you for a second?
361
00:17:23,169 --> 00:17:24,887
How's everything going?
362
00:17:25,209 --> 00:17:26,483
- Pretty good.
- Yeah.
363
00:17:26,649 --> 00:17:29,083
See, the thing is,
I'm in an awkward position here...
364
00:17:29,249 --> 00:17:32,241
...because I don't wanna get
between you two guys...
365
00:17:32,409 --> 00:17:35,481
...but I need a dry-cleaning ticket
that's in the pocket of those pants.
366
00:17:35,649 --> 00:17:38,163
All you gotta do is tell Kramer
to give me my money back...
367
00:17:38,329 --> 00:17:40,604
- ... and you'll get your ticket.
- Yeah.
368
00:17:40,769 --> 00:17:44,444
Yeah, all right.
Well, tell you what I will do, Bania.
369
00:17:45,089 --> 00:17:47,125
You give me the ticket...
370
00:17:47,289 --> 00:17:50,326
...and I will take you out
for a nice dinner.
371
00:17:52,049 --> 00:17:53,562
Can we go back to Mendy's?
372
00:17:53,729 --> 00:17:55,845
You wanna go to Mendy's,
I'll take you to Mendy's.
373
00:17:56,009 --> 00:17:59,046
- Twice. I wanna go twice.
- All right, let's be reasonable, Bania.
374
00:17:59,209 --> 00:18:01,882
I'm taking you out for dinner.
All I want is a little ticket.
375
00:18:02,049 --> 00:18:04,722
- I think that's a pretty good deal.
- Two Mendy's.
376
00:18:06,369 --> 00:18:07,563
All right.
377
00:18:07,729 --> 00:18:10,004
- Just give me the ticket.
- Here you go.
378
00:18:10,849 --> 00:18:15,400
But, Mr. Steinbrenner, how can I be
expected to perform my job properly...
379
00:18:15,569 --> 00:18:19,278
...knowing that my subordinate
is making more money than I am?
380
00:18:19,449 --> 00:18:21,724
With all due respect, sir,
it's out of whack.
381
00:18:21,889 --> 00:18:23,322
I understand what you're saying.
382
00:18:23,489 --> 00:18:25,286
I know what it's like
to be strapped.
383
00:18:25,449 --> 00:18:27,679
As a young man in Cleveland,
I hitchhiked to work.
384
00:18:27,849 --> 00:18:29,726
One time I got picked up
by a bakery truck.
385
00:18:29,889 --> 00:18:33,086
Think that smells good? Try being
cooped up in one of those babies.
386
00:18:33,249 --> 00:18:35,399
I couldn't look at a doughnut
for two years.
387
00:18:35,569 --> 00:18:37,241
Not that I was ever one
for the sweets.
388
00:18:37,409 --> 00:18:40,162
Sure, I like a cupcake every
now and then like everybody else.
389
00:18:40,329 --> 00:18:43,639
You know, I like it when they have
a little cream inside. It's a surprise.
390
00:18:43,809 --> 00:18:46,004
That's good.
The chocolate ones are good too.
391
00:18:46,169 --> 00:18:47,887
Sometimes I can't even
make up my mind.
392
00:18:48,049 --> 00:18:50,847
A lot of times, I'll mix the two together.
Make a vanilla-fudge.
393
00:18:51,329 --> 00:18:52,887
Let me in, it's me.
394
00:18:53,049 --> 00:18:54,960
Here. You don't know
what this is costing me.
395
00:18:55,129 --> 00:18:57,643
All right. Nice work.
396
00:18:57,809 --> 00:18:59,765
Wait. Where's Uma's number?
397
00:18:59,929 --> 00:19:03,001
The moisturizer smudged out
the phone number.
398
00:19:03,929 --> 00:19:05,999
The dry-cleaning number's
gone too.
399
00:19:06,169 --> 00:19:08,239
It must have been
the botanical extracts.
400
00:19:08,409 --> 00:19:10,127
Give me that.
401
00:19:12,249 --> 00:19:14,319
Hey, Bania, the dinner's off.
402
00:19:14,489 --> 00:19:17,049
The ticket's no good.
The numbers are all smudged out.
403
00:19:17,929 --> 00:19:19,487
You trying to get out of Mendy's?
404
00:19:19,649 --> 00:19:21,799
- You can't do that.
- The ticket is worthless.
405
00:19:21,969 --> 00:19:23,448
You promised me.
406
00:19:28,569 --> 00:19:31,606
Hey, isn't that my mother's fur coat?
407
00:19:35,449 --> 00:19:36,928
- No, it's not.
- It is.
408
00:19:37,089 --> 00:19:39,125
- Give me it back.
- What are you talking about?
409
00:19:39,289 --> 00:19:42,964
- You out of your mind?
- Are you crazy, taking my coat?
410
00:19:47,729 --> 00:19:50,482
What, do you think the dry cleaners
is your personal closet?
411
00:19:50,649 --> 00:19:52,924
Hey, Donna, can you get
the salt stain out of this?
412
00:19:53,089 --> 00:19:55,284
Let me see. Piece of cake.
413
00:19:55,449 --> 00:19:58,600
Bring it in. What size is it?
414
00:20:10,529 --> 00:20:11,803
This soup is great.
415
00:20:12,529 --> 00:20:13,882
Yeah, it's very good.
416
00:20:14,049 --> 00:20:18,406
I told you Mendy's had the best
pea soup. The best, Jerry. The best.
417
00:20:18,689 --> 00:20:21,567
- Are you enjoying it?
- Yeah. I'm having a wonderful time.
418
00:20:21,729 --> 00:20:23,481
Wait till you try the swordfish.
419
00:20:23,649 --> 00:20:25,526
You know, Jerry, I was thinking...
420
00:20:25,689 --> 00:20:28,283
...for our next meal, do you think
we should come here...
421
00:20:28,449 --> 00:20:29,882
...or should we go elsewhere?
422
00:20:30,049 --> 00:20:31,243
It has its pros and cons.
423
00:20:31,409 --> 00:20:34,003
On the one hand, here,
you're guaranteed a great meal.
424
00:20:34,169 --> 00:20:36,205
- On the other hand-
- Yeah, yeah, I know.
425
00:20:36,369 --> 00:20:38,087
This would be good,
but it'd be the same.
426
00:20:38,249 --> 00:20:41,366
If we go someplace else, it would
be different, but maybe not as good.
427
00:20:41,529 --> 00:20:44,407
It's a gamble. I get it.
428
00:20:45,089 --> 00:20:46,363
Yeah.
429
00:20:46,529 --> 00:20:49,248
Let's hurry. I gotta go.
I'm meeting a woman for a drink.
430
00:20:49,409 --> 00:20:52,606
- Oh, and who might that be?
- Some woman named Uma.
431
00:20:52,769 --> 00:20:55,158
I got her number off that ticket
before it was smudged.
432
00:20:55,329 --> 00:20:56,603
Hope she's good-looking.
433
00:21:07,969 --> 00:21:11,006
If you are a waiter or a waitress
and you see me in a restaurant...
434
00:21:11,169 --> 00:21:14,081
...I'm telling you now,
I don't wanna hear about the specials.
435
00:21:14,249 --> 00:21:17,639
I don't wanna know about the specials,
I'm sick of the specials, I hate them.
436
00:21:17,809 --> 00:21:21,484
My feeling is, if the specials were
so special, they'd be on the menu.
437
00:21:21,889 --> 00:21:25,040
You know what's special? They don't
know if anybody likes them.
438
00:21:25,209 --> 00:21:29,521
And they always have those overly
creative descriptions of the specials.
439
00:21:29,689 --> 00:21:31,327
The veal is lightly slapped...
440
00:21:31,969 --> 00:21:34,403
...and then sequestered
in a one-bedroom suite...
441
00:21:34,569 --> 00:21:37,129
...with a white-wine intravenous.
442
00:21:48,489 --> 00:21:50,480
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