1 00:00:02,487 --> 00:00:04,125 I love it when people are complimented on their clothes. 2 00:00:05,727 --> 00:00:08,195 And they accept the compliment as if it was about them. 3 00:00:08,367 --> 00:00:11,564 Nice tie. Well, thank you. Thank you very much. 4 00:00:11,887 --> 00:00:16,438 The compliment is for the tie. It's not for you. But we take it. 5 00:00:16,647 --> 00:00:19,878 And that's the job of clothes. To get compliments for us. 6 00:00:20,047 --> 00:00:22,163 Because it's very hard to get compliments... 7 00:00:22,327 --> 00:00:25,637 ...based on your human qualities. Right? Let's face it. 8 00:00:25,807 --> 00:00:28,002 No matter how nice you are, nobody is gonna say: 9 00:00:28,167 --> 00:00:30,123 "Hey, nice person." 10 00:00:30,807 --> 00:00:34,686 It's much easier to be a bastard and just try and match the colours up. 11 00:00:39,207 --> 00:00:41,880 Oh, look at this. 12 00:00:42,047 --> 00:00:45,403 Boy. Oh, I miss the days when they made toys that could kill a kid. 13 00:00:47,207 --> 00:00:49,437 Oh, cool. Look at that. 14 00:00:49,647 --> 00:00:51,638 Yeah, I'm right there with you. 15 00:00:51,807 --> 00:00:56,198 That is a Schwinn Sting-Ray. And it's the girls' model. 16 00:00:56,367 --> 00:00:59,200 Oh, I always wanted one of these when I was little. 17 00:00:59,407 --> 00:01:01,841 What do you think, Jerry? 18 00:01:02,967 --> 00:01:05,720 Jerry. What do you think? 19 00:01:05,887 --> 00:01:08,526 Oh, yeah, it would be great for your paper route. 20 00:01:08,687 --> 00:01:10,086 I love it. I'm getting it. 21 00:01:10,287 --> 00:01:13,757 Can you help me get it down, Jerr? Jerry. 22 00:01:13,967 --> 00:01:16,800 - Your friend needs some help. - The only way to really help her... 23 00:01:16,967 --> 00:01:18,719 ...is to just let her be. 24 00:01:26,847 --> 00:01:28,439 Hey. 25 00:01:33,727 --> 00:01:36,480 - A little baby girl? - Doctor says it could be any day now. 26 00:01:37,327 --> 00:01:41,366 So, Carrie, you and Susan are cousins. 27 00:01:42,047 --> 00:01:45,756 So your baby daughter is gonna be Susan's second cousin, right? 28 00:01:45,927 --> 00:01:48,964 - So, what does that make me? - It doesn't make you anything. 29 00:01:49,847 --> 00:01:53,203 Well, so, legally, I could marry your daughter. 30 00:01:59,727 --> 00:02:01,365 So have you picked out a name yet? 31 00:02:01,567 --> 00:02:03,717 Well, we've narrowed it down to a few. 32 00:02:03,887 --> 00:02:05,115 We like Kimberly. 33 00:02:05,487 --> 00:02:07,762 Oh, boy. 34 00:02:07,967 --> 00:02:09,844 You don't like Kimberly? 35 00:02:11,367 --> 00:02:13,358 - What else you got? - How about Joan? 36 00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:15,876 - Come on, I'm eating here. - George. 37 00:02:16,087 --> 00:02:18,760 - Pamela? - Pamela? 38 00:02:19,727 --> 00:02:21,080 All right. I'll tell you what. 39 00:02:21,247 --> 00:02:23,556 You look like nice people. I'm gonna help you out. 40 00:02:24,727 --> 00:02:27,719 You want a beautiful name? Soda. 41 00:02:29,247 --> 00:02:30,805 - What? - Soda. 42 00:02:31,167 --> 00:02:33,078 S- O-D-A. Soda. 43 00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:35,437 I don't know. It sounds a little strange. 44 00:02:36,047 --> 00:02:38,641 All names sound strange the first time you hear them. 45 00:02:38,807 --> 00:02:41,002 Are you telling me people loved the name Blanche... 46 00:02:41,167 --> 00:02:43,362 ...the first time they heard it? 47 00:02:43,567 --> 00:02:46,559 - Yeah, but Soda? - Yeah, that's right. 48 00:02:46,727 --> 00:02:48,843 - It's working. - We'll put it on the list. 49 00:02:49,647 --> 00:02:52,878 I solve problems. That's just what I do. 50 00:02:57,327 --> 00:02:59,795 Yeah, let's look at that boy. 51 00:03:00,527 --> 00:03:01,801 That's good. 52 00:03:01,967 --> 00:03:03,605 You're going to town with that turkey. 53 00:03:03,767 --> 00:03:05,837 Oh, yeah. I got a big appetite. 54 00:03:07,327 --> 00:03:09,045 Oh, Jerry. You got no mustard. 55 00:03:09,247 --> 00:03:11,920 - It's on the door. - What, this yellow stuff? 56 00:03:12,087 --> 00:03:13,918 No, I said, mustard, Jerry. Dijon. 57 00:03:15,407 --> 00:03:17,159 I still wanna do it. 58 00:03:18,927 --> 00:03:20,326 No. 59 00:03:22,167 --> 00:03:23,441 That's bush league. No. 60 00:03:24,127 --> 00:03:26,118 Hey, wait. You're just gonna leave it there? 61 00:03:26,287 --> 00:03:28,437 - It's half a pound of turkey. - I can't eat that. 62 00:03:28,607 --> 00:03:30,359 You can't eat a sandwich without Dijon. 63 00:03:30,527 --> 00:03:33,997 Yeah, you're right. I really should keep more of your favourites on hand. 64 00:03:34,727 --> 00:03:38,640 Hey, hey, hey. I'm getting a vibe here. 65 00:03:39,367 --> 00:03:41,278 What, are you unhappy with our arrangement? 66 00:03:42,087 --> 00:03:43,759 What arrangement? 67 00:03:43,967 --> 00:03:46,765 I was under the impression that I could take anything I wanted... 68 00:03:46,927 --> 00:03:48,997 ...from your fridge. You take whatever from mine. 69 00:03:49,207 --> 00:03:51,562 Let me know when you get something in there, and I will. 70 00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:54,441 - Oh, hey. - Hey. 71 00:03:54,607 --> 00:03:57,440 Hey. What's with your neck? 72 00:03:58,367 --> 00:04:01,916 It's still killing me from having to get that bike off the wall... 73 00:04:02,087 --> 00:04:03,406 ...by myself. 74 00:04:03,687 --> 00:04:06,440 Well, if it's any consolation, I did get her number. 75 00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:08,683 I think I really strained it. 76 00:04:08,847 --> 00:04:10,963 Oh, I doubt you strained it. Maybe you pulled it. 77 00:04:11,127 --> 00:04:12,719 - Maybe. - Did you twist it? 78 00:04:12,887 --> 00:04:14,718 - You could have twisted it? - I don't know. 79 00:04:14,927 --> 00:04:16,599 Did you wrench it? Did you jam it? 80 00:04:16,767 --> 00:04:19,122 - Maybe you squeezed it and turned it? - Why don't you... 81 00:04:19,287 --> 00:04:21,562 - ... just shut the hell up. - All right. 82 00:04:22,607 --> 00:04:24,199 God, man, this is killing me. 83 00:04:24,367 --> 00:04:28,042 I would give that bike to the person who could make this pain go away. 84 00:04:28,247 --> 00:04:32,479 - You're really hurting, huh? - Oh, Kramer, it's just awful. 85 00:04:32,647 --> 00:04:34,717 Well, you're arterioles have constricted. 86 00:04:34,927 --> 00:04:36,485 All right, lean forward. Relax. 87 00:04:36,647 --> 00:04:38,763 - What? What? - Encounter shiatsu. 88 00:04:38,927 --> 00:04:40,838 Wait a minute. You know what you're doing? 89 00:04:41,007 --> 00:04:44,397 Oh, yeah. A wise man once taught me the healing power... 90 00:04:44,567 --> 00:04:46,922 ...of the body's natural pressure points. 91 00:04:47,127 --> 00:04:49,118 He sells T-shirts near the World Trade Center. 92 00:04:50,687 --> 00:04:52,006 He's a genius. 93 00:04:52,167 --> 00:04:53,646 Here we go. Here we go. 94 00:04:53,807 --> 00:04:55,684 All right, from pain will come pleasure. 95 00:04:58,487 --> 00:04:59,886 Voilà. 96 00:05:00,607 --> 00:05:02,359 - Oh, my God. - Yeah. 97 00:05:02,527 --> 00:05:06,315 Wow, that is unbelievable. 98 00:05:06,487 --> 00:05:08,682 That pain is totally gone. 99 00:05:08,847 --> 00:05:12,522 What's even more amazing is his formal training is in paediatrics. 100 00:05:13,167 --> 00:05:14,600 All right. My work is done here. 101 00:05:14,767 --> 00:05:16,883 Oh, man. Kramer, thank you. 102 00:05:17,087 --> 00:05:19,681 - You can send that bike over any time. - What? 103 00:05:20,207 --> 00:05:22,596 - What is he talking about? - I don't know. 104 00:05:22,767 --> 00:05:25,156 You said you'd give the bike to whoever fixes your neck. 105 00:05:25,367 --> 00:05:27,835 - You really think he wants the bike? - Oh, yeah. 106 00:05:28,007 --> 00:05:29,360 But it took him like 10 seconds. 107 00:05:29,567 --> 00:05:32,525 Well, that's the most he's worked in the last four months. 108 00:05:36,567 --> 00:05:39,286 - I think they really went for that Soda. - What are you, crazy? 109 00:05:39,447 --> 00:05:41,642 They hated it. They were just humouring you. 110 00:05:41,807 --> 00:05:43,923 All right. Very good. Believe me. 111 00:05:44,087 --> 00:05:46,840 - That kid's going to be called Soda. - I can tell you... 112 00:05:47,007 --> 00:05:48,804 ...I would never name my child Soda. 113 00:05:49,007 --> 00:05:50,918 Oh, no, no, no. No, of course not. 114 00:05:51,087 --> 00:05:53,806 I got a great name for our kids, a real original. 115 00:05:54,007 --> 00:05:55,884 You wanna hear what it is? Are you ready? 116 00:05:56,047 --> 00:05:57,446 Yeah. 117 00:05:59,607 --> 00:06:02,246 - What is that, sign language? - No. 118 00:06:02,727 --> 00:06:04,638 Seven. 119 00:06:04,847 --> 00:06:06,997 Seven Costanza. You're serious? 120 00:06:07,207 --> 00:06:09,675 Yeah, it's a beautiful name for a boy or a girl. 121 00:06:09,847 --> 00:06:12,998 - Especially a girl. Or a boy. - I don't think so. 122 00:06:13,207 --> 00:06:16,563 - What, you don't like the name? - It's not a name. It's a number. 123 00:06:16,767 --> 00:06:18,758 I know. It's Mickey Mantle's number. 124 00:06:18,927 --> 00:06:21,077 So not only is it an all-around beautiful name... 125 00:06:21,247 --> 00:06:24,444 - ... it is also a living tribute. - It's awful. I hate it. 126 00:06:25,287 --> 00:06:28,085 - Well, that's the name. - Oh, no it is not. 127 00:06:28,287 --> 00:06:31,802 No child of mine is ever going to be named Seven. 128 00:06:32,007 --> 00:06:33,804 All right. Let's just stay calm here. 129 00:06:33,967 --> 00:06:36,322 Don't get all crazy on me. 130 00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:39,558 Seven? Yeah, I guess I could see it. 131 00:06:39,727 --> 00:06:42,366 Seven. Seven periods of school. Seven beatings a day. 132 00:06:43,527 --> 00:06:46,997 Roughly seven stitches a beating, and, eventually, seven years to life. 133 00:06:47,167 --> 00:06:48,805 You're doing that child quite a service. 134 00:06:49,007 --> 00:06:50,406 Yes, I am. 135 00:06:50,567 --> 00:06:52,956 I defy you to come up with a better name than Seven. 136 00:06:53,207 --> 00:06:54,606 All right. Let's see. 137 00:06:54,767 --> 00:06:56,837 How about Mug? 138 00:06:57,047 --> 00:06:59,038 Mug Costanza. 139 00:06:59,207 --> 00:07:00,435 That's original. 140 00:07:00,607 --> 00:07:03,485 - Ketchup. Pretty name for a girl. - Right. You having a good time? 141 00:07:03,647 --> 00:07:06,286 I got 50 right here in the cupboard. How about Bisquick? 142 00:07:06,687 --> 00:07:10,396 Pimento? Gherkin? Sauce? 143 00:07:10,567 --> 00:07:13,957 - Maxwell House? - All right, already. 144 00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:15,885 This is a very key issue with me, Jerry. 145 00:07:16,047 --> 00:07:17,446 I had this name for a long time. 146 00:07:17,607 --> 00:07:19,006 Oh, I forgot to call Christie. 147 00:07:19,207 --> 00:07:20,720 That's the one you met in the store? 148 00:07:20,887 --> 00:07:23,526 She had this great black and white dress with a scoop neck. 149 00:07:23,687 --> 00:07:25,598 She looked like some kind of superhero. 150 00:07:25,967 --> 00:07:28,640 And you met her in an antique store. I don't know how you do it. 151 00:07:28,847 --> 00:07:30,280 I'm not engaged. 152 00:07:32,927 --> 00:07:34,485 - I got it. - Got what? 153 00:07:34,647 --> 00:07:37,241 I got the answer, Jerry. Refrigerator problem is solved. 154 00:07:37,647 --> 00:07:39,842 Oh, it's no problem. You can take whatever you want. 155 00:07:40,047 --> 00:07:42,197 I will. But now I'm accountable. 156 00:07:42,367 --> 00:07:44,198 All right, I take what I want. Here. 157 00:07:44,367 --> 00:07:45,686 And I write it down. 158 00:07:45,847 --> 00:07:47,997 One cupcake. 159 00:07:48,167 --> 00:07:50,761 And then I put it in the bowl. 160 00:07:50,927 --> 00:07:53,122 There. Very simple. 161 00:07:53,327 --> 00:07:57,923 - Sort of a mooching inventory. - No, not mooching. 162 00:07:58,087 --> 00:07:59,918 Because at the end of the week you add them. 163 00:08:00,087 --> 00:08:01,805 - And you give me the bill. - All right. 164 00:08:01,967 --> 00:08:03,366 Look, I gotta run some errands. 165 00:08:03,567 --> 00:08:06,081 When Elaine comes by with that bike, hang on to it for me. 166 00:08:06,287 --> 00:08:08,323 Kramer, I don't know if you're getting that bike. 167 00:08:08,487 --> 00:08:11,285 Oh, yes, I am. We had a verbal contract. 168 00:08:11,447 --> 00:08:14,598 If we can't take each other at our word, all is lost. 169 00:08:15,887 --> 00:08:17,445 Oh, yeah, yeah, put that on my tab. 170 00:08:21,407 --> 00:08:23,682 Well, this is it. The food is atrocious. 171 00:08:23,847 --> 00:08:26,680 But the busboys are the best in the city. 172 00:08:26,887 --> 00:08:30,800 - May I take your coat, miss? - Yes, thank you. 173 00:08:38,967 --> 00:08:41,242 - The same outfit? - The exact same outfit. 174 00:08:41,447 --> 00:08:43,722 - How many days between encounters? - Three. 175 00:08:43,887 --> 00:08:48,358 Three days. Well, maybe you caught her on the cusp of a new wash cycle. 176 00:08:48,807 --> 00:08:51,002 You know, she did laundry the day after she met you. 177 00:08:51,167 --> 00:08:53,203 Everything got clean. She started all over again. 178 00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:58,716 Possibly. But then shouldn't the outfit only reappear at the end of the cycle? 179 00:08:58,927 --> 00:09:01,122 Maybe she moved it up in the rotation. 180 00:09:02,007 --> 00:09:05,443 Why? It's our first date. She's already in reruns. 181 00:09:06,287 --> 00:09:08,482 - Very curious. - Indeed. 182 00:09:08,687 --> 00:09:10,723 Einstein wore the exact same outfit every day. 183 00:09:10,927 --> 00:09:13,760 Well, if she splits the atom, I'll let it slide. 184 00:09:15,447 --> 00:09:18,041 - All right. I'm heading home. - Did Susan change her mind... 185 00:09:18,207 --> 00:09:20,323 - ... about the name? - Not yet, but she's weakening. 186 00:09:20,527 --> 00:09:22,119 Just because your life is destroyed... 187 00:09:22,287 --> 00:09:24,517 ...don't destroy someone else's. 188 00:09:24,727 --> 00:09:27,366 It's Mickey Mantle, Jerry. My idol. 189 00:09:27,527 --> 00:09:30,280 - How about Mickey? - Mickey? 190 00:09:30,927 --> 00:09:32,645 Mickey... 191 00:09:38,327 --> 00:09:41,319 - Is this your half a can of soda? - Nope, that's yours. 192 00:09:41,487 --> 00:09:43,364 My half is gone. 193 00:09:46,167 --> 00:09:47,520 - What? - Yeah. 194 00:09:47,727 --> 00:09:50,161 I put my half a can here in the tab. 195 00:09:50,327 --> 00:09:54,206 - Why? What's your beef? - You cannot buy half a can of soda. 196 00:09:54,367 --> 00:09:57,404 - Well, why not? - I don't wanna get into the physics of it. 197 00:09:57,567 --> 00:09:59,956 But you know the sound a can makes when you open it? 198 00:10:00,127 --> 00:10:01,401 - Yeah. - That is the sound... 199 00:10:01,567 --> 00:10:03,239 ...of you buying a whole can. 200 00:10:03,407 --> 00:10:06,797 And the same goes for this. Okay? 201 00:10:06,967 --> 00:10:10,403 When you pierce the skin of a piece of fruit, you've bought the whole fruit. 202 00:10:10,567 --> 00:10:13,001 Not a third of an apple. Not a half of a banana. 203 00:10:13,167 --> 00:10:14,885 - All right. - You bite it, you bought it. 204 00:10:15,087 --> 00:10:17,282 All right. I'll make the necessary adjustments. 205 00:10:17,447 --> 00:10:19,278 - All right. - Thank you. 206 00:10:19,447 --> 00:10:21,802 Oh, so how's the neck? 207 00:10:22,007 --> 00:10:23,235 Nice and loose? 208 00:10:23,447 --> 00:10:25,642 Lookit, Kramer, you are not getting this bike. 209 00:10:25,807 --> 00:10:28,958 I don't even know why you want it. I mean, it's a girls' bike. 210 00:10:29,127 --> 00:10:31,038 It's a verbal contract. We had a deal. 211 00:10:31,247 --> 00:10:32,475 No, we didn't. 212 00:10:32,647 --> 00:10:34,160 You take these things too literally. 213 00:10:34,327 --> 00:10:37,558 It's like saying you're hungry enough to eat horse. 214 00:10:37,767 --> 00:10:40,839 Well my friend Jay Riemenschneider eats horse all the time. 215 00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:43,362 He gets it from his butcher. 216 00:10:43,527 --> 00:10:44,960 This is not the point. 217 00:10:45,127 --> 00:10:48,517 The point is, you just can't have the bike. 218 00:10:48,687 --> 00:10:50,917 Boy, I am really surprised at you. 219 00:10:51,087 --> 00:10:54,124 You are the last person I figured would do something like this. 220 00:10:54,327 --> 00:10:57,717 I mean, George, yeah, I can see that. Even Jerry. 221 00:10:58,207 --> 00:11:01,756 But not you, Elaine. I always put you up here. 222 00:11:01,927 --> 00:11:04,236 They're over here. 223 00:11:04,407 --> 00:11:07,956 Now you're all: 224 00:11:12,407 --> 00:11:15,877 - All right. - Yeah. 225 00:11:19,327 --> 00:11:21,716 Come on. It's a fantastic name. 226 00:11:21,927 --> 00:11:25,317 It's a real original. Nobody else is gonna have it. And I absolutely love it. 227 00:11:25,527 --> 00:11:27,438 Well, I don't know how original it's gonna be. 228 00:11:28,047 --> 00:11:30,402 - Why not? - Well, I was telling Carrie... 229 00:11:30,567 --> 00:11:33,798 ...about our argument. And when I told them the name, they just loved it. 230 00:11:34,887 --> 00:11:38,038 - So, what are you saying? - They're naming their baby Seven. 231 00:11:39,367 --> 00:11:41,323 What? They're stealing the name? 232 00:11:41,487 --> 00:11:42,715 That's my name. I made it up. 233 00:11:42,927 --> 00:11:44,440 I can't believe they're using it. 234 00:11:44,647 --> 00:11:46,205 Now, it's not gonna be original. 235 00:11:46,367 --> 00:11:47,880 It's gonna lose all its cachet. 236 00:11:48,047 --> 00:11:50,117 I don't know how much cachet it had to begin with. 237 00:11:50,327 --> 00:11:51,760 Oh, it's got cachet, baby. 238 00:11:51,927 --> 00:11:54,600 It's got cachet up the ying-yang. 239 00:11:59,887 --> 00:12:01,764 Oh, God. 240 00:12:02,367 --> 00:12:04,835 Oh, God. 241 00:12:06,167 --> 00:12:07,646 Kramer. 242 00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:15,719 Watch your step. 243 00:12:18,327 --> 00:12:19,760 Oh, stupid Kramer. 244 00:12:19,967 --> 00:12:22,606 Excuse me, Elaine. 245 00:12:22,767 --> 00:12:24,325 Over here. 246 00:12:24,487 --> 00:12:26,364 I thought that was you. You're Jerry's friend. 247 00:12:26,567 --> 00:12:28,398 Yeah. Yeah. 248 00:12:28,567 --> 00:12:31,286 - Christie? - Yes, how you doing? 249 00:12:31,487 --> 00:12:33,125 I'm fine. 250 00:12:33,287 --> 00:12:35,437 Well, I gotta run. It was good to see you. 251 00:12:35,647 --> 00:12:38,207 Okay. It was good to... 252 00:12:38,367 --> 00:12:40,164 Good to see you. 253 00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:43,636 - Looking good. - Hey, Cosmo. 254 00:12:43,807 --> 00:12:46,275 - Nice wheels. - You got that right. 255 00:12:46,447 --> 00:12:49,120 - Hey, you're riding a girls' bike. - Kramer. 256 00:12:49,487 --> 00:12:51,125 Kramer. 257 00:12:54,167 --> 00:12:55,964 - He/o. - Hello, Ken. 258 00:12:56,127 --> 00:12:58,197 It's George Costanza. 259 00:12:58,367 --> 00:13:00,244 I think we need to talk. 260 00:13:01,767 --> 00:13:03,359 Kramer. 261 00:13:04,727 --> 00:13:06,877 - Kramer! - Hey. 262 00:13:07,047 --> 00:13:09,925 God. Is Kramer back from his little joyride yet? 263 00:13:10,327 --> 00:13:13,797 - Haven't seen him. How's the neck? - His chiropractic job was a crock. 264 00:13:13,967 --> 00:13:16,276 I mean, it's even worse than it was before. 265 00:13:16,487 --> 00:13:18,205 I'd think Kramer would have a knack... 266 00:13:18,367 --> 00:13:20,244 ...for moving a person's spine around. 267 00:13:21,687 --> 00:13:23,086 Hey, you know what? 268 00:13:23,247 --> 00:13:25,477 I think I ran into that girl from the antique store. 269 00:13:25,647 --> 00:13:28,798 - What's her name, Christie? - You saw her? What was she wearing? 270 00:13:30,447 --> 00:13:33,086 I don't know. I couldn't see. I couldn't look down... 271 00:13:33,247 --> 00:13:35,602 - ... because of my neck. - Didn't you get a glimpse? 272 00:13:35,767 --> 00:13:37,485 - An impression? - What do you care? 273 00:13:37,687 --> 00:13:39,882 Both times I've seen her, she's worn the same dress. 274 00:13:44,367 --> 00:13:46,927 - Did you have a nice ride? - Oh, great ride. 275 00:13:47,087 --> 00:13:49,965 Oh, that's good, because it was your last. 276 00:13:52,047 --> 00:13:53,844 What are you talking about? We had a deal. 277 00:13:54,047 --> 00:13:56,959 You gotta give me back that bike. Look at this! Look! 278 00:13:57,127 --> 00:13:59,038 I couldn't even crawl out of bed this morning. 279 00:13:59,207 --> 00:14:02,199 Bed? You should be sleeping on a wooden board for at least a week. 280 00:14:02,407 --> 00:14:05,763 - What? You never told me that. - Well, it's common sense. 281 00:14:05,927 --> 00:14:08,077 What is he talking about? He's being ridiculous. 282 00:14:08,247 --> 00:14:09,839 Look, Jerry, you know the whole story. 283 00:14:10,007 --> 00:14:11,406 - You should settle this. - Yeah. 284 00:14:11,567 --> 00:14:13,319 I'm flattered you'd appeal to my wisdom. 285 00:14:13,487 --> 00:14:15,717 But, unfortunately, my friendship to each of you... 286 00:14:15,887 --> 00:14:17,718 ...precludes my getting involved. 287 00:14:17,887 --> 00:14:20,196 What you need is an impartial mediator. 288 00:14:20,407 --> 00:14:22,796 Yeah, I'd go for that. Would you go for that? 289 00:14:22,967 --> 00:14:24,844 All right, I'm down. 290 00:14:25,367 --> 00:14:27,722 It would have to be someone who hasn't heard the story. 291 00:14:27,887 --> 00:14:30,879 Someone who is unencumbered by any emotional attachment. 292 00:14:31,047 --> 00:14:32,526 Someone whose heart is so dark... 293 00:14:32,687 --> 00:14:36,646 ...it cannot be swayed by pity, emotion or human compassion of any kind. 294 00:14:37,207 --> 00:14:38,845 So that's the situation. 295 00:14:40,367 --> 00:14:43,484 You present an interesting dilemma. 296 00:14:44,247 --> 00:14:47,523 Each of you seemingly has a legitimate claim to the bicycle. 297 00:14:47,847 --> 00:14:52,159 And yet the bicycle can have only one rightful owner. 298 00:14:52,327 --> 00:14:54,443 Quite the conundrum. 299 00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:58,237 As a federal employee, I believe the law is all we have. 300 00:14:58,407 --> 00:15:00,523 It's all that separates us from the savages... 301 00:15:00,687 --> 00:15:02,598 ...who don't deserve the privilege of mail. 302 00:15:02,767 --> 00:15:05,076 Stuffing parcels in mailboxes, where they don't belong. 303 00:15:05,287 --> 00:15:06,959 Newman! 304 00:15:10,727 --> 00:15:15,198 But you must promise that you will abide by my decision... 305 00:15:15,367 --> 00:15:19,246 ...no matter how unjust it may seem to either of you. 306 00:15:19,407 --> 00:15:21,318 Do I have your word? 307 00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:23,318 - All right, yeah. - Yeah. 308 00:15:23,487 --> 00:15:26,604 All right. Let's begin. 309 00:15:27,127 --> 00:15:28,685 My cocoa. 310 00:15:29,967 --> 00:15:31,320 Why can't we use Seven? 311 00:15:31,527 --> 00:15:34,803 It's my name. I made it up. You can't just steal it. 312 00:15:35,007 --> 00:15:36,998 Well, it's not as if Susan's pregnant. 313 00:15:37,167 --> 00:15:39,965 You already postponed the wedding. Who knows if you'll get married. 314 00:15:40,167 --> 00:15:43,364 Hey, hey, don't worry about me. I'm not a waffler. I don't waffle. 315 00:15:43,527 --> 00:15:45,438 Look, we're both big Mickey Mantle fans. 316 00:15:45,607 --> 00:15:47,325 And we love the name. It's very unusual. 317 00:15:47,487 --> 00:15:50,047 What happened to Soda? I thought we all agreed on Soda. 318 00:15:50,247 --> 00:15:52,556 - We don't care for Soda. - You don't care for Soda? 319 00:15:52,767 --> 00:15:54,485 No, no. We don't like Soda at all. 320 00:15:54,687 --> 00:15:57,679 How do you not like Soda? It's bubbly. It's refreshing. 321 00:15:57,847 --> 00:15:59,166 - What is it? - I felt something. 322 00:15:59,327 --> 00:16:01,124 - Are you okay? - I'm going into labour. 323 00:16:01,287 --> 00:16:04,085 Oh, God. Okay, let's not panic. Let's just get to the hospital. 324 00:16:04,247 --> 00:16:06,602 - Okay. - I got the suitcase packed right here. 325 00:16:06,767 --> 00:16:08,803 - Let's go. - What about Six? 326 00:16:09,367 --> 00:16:11,562 Nine? Thirteen? Thirteen is no good. 327 00:16:11,727 --> 00:16:13,843 Fourteen. Fourteen. 328 00:16:19,087 --> 00:16:21,396 Are you okay, Jerry? You seem quiet. 329 00:16:21,847 --> 00:16:24,361 No, I'm just a little worn-out. 330 00:16:24,567 --> 00:16:27,798 - I know exactly what you mean. - Oh, I'm sure you do. 331 00:16:28,007 --> 00:16:30,282 What in God's name is going on here? 332 00:16:30,447 --> 00:16:32,642 Is she wearing the same thing over and over again? 333 00:16:32,807 --> 00:16:35,275 Or does she have a c/oset fu/ of these /ik e Superman? 334 00:16:35,447 --> 00:16:37,642 I've got to un/ock this mystery. 335 00:16:37,807 --> 00:16:39,877 Oh, my God. 336 00:16:40,927 --> 00:16:43,725 I can't go to the movies like this. 337 00:16:44,887 --> 00:16:47,321 Do you mind if we go back to my apartment so I can change? 338 00:16:47,847 --> 00:16:51,886 Change? Yes, I think that's a super idea. 339 00:16:53,647 --> 00:16:56,525 - Are we almost there? - Just keep breathing, okay? 340 00:16:56,687 --> 00:16:58,405 - Okay, okay. - Okay. 341 00:16:58,567 --> 00:17:02,606 You know, the thing is, I kind of promised the widow Mantle... 342 00:17:02,767 --> 00:17:04,644 ...that I would name my baby Seven. 343 00:17:04,807 --> 00:17:07,321 Now's not the best time, George. 344 00:17:08,567 --> 00:17:10,876 It's just that I know her. And, boy- 345 00:17:11,047 --> 00:17:12,924 George, she's in labour. 346 00:17:13,807 --> 00:17:15,559 So am I. 347 00:17:18,647 --> 00:17:23,675 Well, you both presented very convincing arguments. 348 00:17:24,007 --> 00:17:26,123 On the one hand, Elaine... 349 00:17:26,287 --> 00:17:28,721 ...your promise was given in haste. 350 00:17:28,927 --> 00:17:31,122 But was it not still a promise? 351 00:17:32,807 --> 00:17:37,085 And, Kramer, you did provide a service in exchange for compensation. 352 00:17:37,247 --> 00:17:40,876 But does the fee, once paid, not entitle the buyer... 353 00:17:41,047 --> 00:17:44,323 ...to some assurance of reliability? 354 00:17:46,247 --> 00:17:50,365 These were not easy questions to answer. 355 00:17:50,527 --> 00:17:51,880 Not for any man. 356 00:17:52,367 --> 00:17:54,927 But I have made a decision. 357 00:17:55,407 --> 00:17:58,638 We will cut the bike down the middle... 358 00:17:58,807 --> 00:18:00,718 ...and give half to each of you. 359 00:18:00,927 --> 00:18:02,963 What? This is your solution? 360 00:18:03,127 --> 00:18:04,845 To ruin the bike? 361 00:18:05,007 --> 00:18:07,396 All right. Fine, fine. Go ahead. 362 00:18:07,567 --> 00:18:10,445 - Cut the stupid thing in half. - No, no, no. Give it to her. 363 00:18:10,607 --> 00:18:12,916 I'd rather it belong to another than see it destroyed. 364 00:18:13,087 --> 00:18:14,918 Newman, give it to her. I beg you. 365 00:18:15,087 --> 00:18:18,443 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Not so fast, Elaine. 366 00:18:18,607 --> 00:18:20,279 Only the bike's true owner... 367 00:18:20,447 --> 00:18:23,200 ...would rather give it away than see it come to harm. 368 00:18:23,367 --> 00:18:25,881 - Kramer, the bike is yours. - What? 369 00:18:26,047 --> 00:18:29,084 Sweet justice. Newman, you are wise. 370 00:18:29,247 --> 00:18:30,646 But this isn't fair. 371 00:18:30,847 --> 00:18:33,998 Lookit, my neck is still hurting me. And now you have the bike? 372 00:18:34,207 --> 00:18:35,720 Well, tell it to the judge, honey. 373 00:18:36,367 --> 00:18:38,676 I'm going for a ride. 374 00:18:39,807 --> 00:18:41,081 Here we are. 375 00:18:41,727 --> 00:18:44,719 So this is the fortress of solitude. 376 00:18:45,807 --> 00:18:47,240 Well, I guess I'll go change. 377 00:18:47,447 --> 00:18:51,281 Yes, change. By all means, change. 378 00:19:03,087 --> 00:19:04,759 August 17 th, 1992. 379 00:19:04,967 --> 00:19:06,446 The same dress. 380 00:19:06,607 --> 00:19:09,644 She never changes. Oh, my God. 381 00:19:09,927 --> 00:19:12,236 She's gotta have hundreds of these dresses. 382 00:19:12,407 --> 00:19:15,240 There must be a secret stash around here somewhere. 383 00:19:20,247 --> 00:19:22,841 - Are you looking for something? - I thought you were changing. 384 00:19:23,047 --> 00:19:25,436 You know, maybe we should just call it a night. 385 00:19:25,647 --> 00:19:27,877 No, no, no. Come on. Put something else on. 386 00:19:28,047 --> 00:19:29,446 It's early. Let's go out. 387 00:19:29,887 --> 00:19:32,082 I think I'm just gonna go to bed. 388 00:19:33,327 --> 00:19:36,922 You know, I'm kind of tired myself. I'll just sleep here on the couch. 389 00:19:37,087 --> 00:19:40,477 In the morning, we'll walk out together. Both dressed, different clothes. 390 00:19:40,687 --> 00:19:41,915 I'll be in the same clothes. 391 00:19:42,087 --> 00:19:44,237 You'll be in different clothes, as it's your place. 392 00:19:44,407 --> 00:19:47,080 We'll go down. Me in my same clothes, you in different clothes. 393 00:19:47,287 --> 00:19:49,164 Jerry, I don't think so. 394 00:19:51,047 --> 00:19:52,639 - Wanna throw something on, walk me... 395 00:19:52,847 --> 00:19:54,166 - ... to a cab? - Get out. 396 00:19:54,327 --> 00:19:57,524 Tell me what you're wearing tomorrow. I'll help you lay it out on the bed. 397 00:19:59,967 --> 00:20:03,039 - Okay, breathe, honey. Breathe. - You're really being very selfish. 398 00:20:03,247 --> 00:20:05,522 Be nice if you'd think of someone other than yourself. 399 00:20:05,687 --> 00:20:07,882 - I'm having a baby. - You're not getting Seven. 400 00:20:08,047 --> 00:20:10,163 - Now, get out of here. - Please, I have so little. 401 00:20:10,327 --> 00:20:12,477 - I'm sorry, sir. Family only. - I'm family. 402 00:20:12,647 --> 00:20:14,444 I'm having sex with the cousin. 403 00:20:14,607 --> 00:20:18,520 Seven! Seven! 404 00:20:19,847 --> 00:20:23,123 Hello, Christie. I was wondering if we could get together again. 405 00:20:23,407 --> 00:20:24,920 Oh, really? 406 00:20:25,087 --> 00:20:27,043 You can't break up with me over the phone. 407 00:20:27,247 --> 00:20:29,886 You gotta do this in person. It doesn't have to be one-on-one. 408 00:20:30,047 --> 00:20:32,038 Bring a group of friends. I just wanna see you. 409 00:20:32,207 --> 00:20:35,563 Don't hang up on me. Why do you always wear the same dress? Hello? 410 00:20:37,367 --> 00:20:39,437 Jerry, if you're gonna be snacking on these... 411 00:20:39,607 --> 00:20:41,677 ...you can't expect me to pay for the whole box. 412 00:20:42,167 --> 00:20:44,283 All right, Hobo Joe. 413 00:20:45,327 --> 00:20:47,477 I didn't wanna put a damper on your smorgasbord. 414 00:20:47,647 --> 00:20:50,719 But it's the end of the week, so I added up your tab. 415 00:20:52,327 --> 00:20:54,079 I know, pretty steep. 416 00:20:54,247 --> 00:20:55,919 Well, I don't have this kind of cash. 417 00:20:56,127 --> 00:20:59,119 - Few do. - I'm good for it. 418 00:20:59,327 --> 00:21:02,444 Yeah, well, until this bill is paid, the food court is closed. 419 00:21:02,607 --> 00:21:05,201 Closed? All right. 420 00:21:05,367 --> 00:21:09,155 I'll get that money for you in five minutes. And don't eat any more. 421 00:21:12,807 --> 00:21:14,035 Hey, that's my bike. 422 00:21:16,247 --> 00:21:18,238 - Gangway. - This is my bike. 423 00:21:18,447 --> 00:21:21,120 Oh, no. No, no, no. I bought it from Kramer. 424 00:21:21,567 --> 00:21:23,080 He was hard up for cash. 425 00:21:23,247 --> 00:21:25,761 Fifty bucks. Can you believe it? 426 00:21:26,447 --> 00:21:28,199 I had to make some minor modifications. 427 00:21:28,567 --> 00:21:30,558 Solid tires, reinforced seat post... 428 00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:33,998 ...heavy-duty shocks. But, baby, this is one sweet ride. 429 00:21:34,207 --> 00:21:36,926 No, you gotta give me back that bike. Newman, give it. 430 00:21:37,287 --> 00:21:39,403 Elaine, Elaine. Help me. Help me. 431 00:21:39,567 --> 00:21:41,637 Help. Help. Help.