1 00:00:06,619 --> 00:00:09,577 Say me, you and Kramer are flying over the Andes. 2 00:00:09,739 --> 00:00:11,252 Why are we flying over the Andes? 3 00:00:11,419 --> 00:00:14,491 We got a soccer game in Chile. Anyway, the plane crashes. 4 00:00:14,659 --> 00:00:17,651 -Who are you gonna eat to survive? -Kramer. 5 00:00:18,379 --> 00:00:21,371 -So fast? What about me? -No. 6 00:00:22,299 --> 00:00:25,609 Kramer's so stringy. l'm plump, juicy. 7 00:00:25,779 --> 00:00:29,977 Kramer's got more muscle, higher protein content. lt's better for you. 8 00:00:30,139 --> 00:00:34,052 -Well, l would eat you. -That's very nice, l guess. 9 00:00:34,219 --> 00:00:36,369 Why wouldn't you eat me? l'm your best friend. 10 00:00:36,539 --> 00:00:38,689 lf other people are having some, l'll try you. 11 00:00:38,859 --> 00:00:40,372 Thank you. 12 00:00:40,979 --> 00:00:43,174 -Can l have a piece of that? -No. 13 00:00:49,539 --> 00:00:52,178 George, l can't have sex. 14 00:00:56,059 --> 00:00:58,493 With me, or in general? 15 00:00:59,259 --> 00:01:01,898 l went to the doctor today. l have mono. 16 00:01:02,059 --> 00:01:03,811 Nucleosis? 17 00:01:03,979 --> 00:01:07,369 -l hope that's not a problem for you. -No, no. 18 00:01:08,699 --> 00:01:12,374 So how long is this not gonna be a problem for me? 19 00:01:14,579 --> 00:01:17,412 -Six weeks? -Yeah, six weeks. 20 00:01:17,579 --> 00:01:19,535 So what? You've gone six weeks before. 21 00:01:19,699 --> 00:01:21,894 l can do six weeks standing on my head. 22 00:01:22,699 --> 00:01:25,816 l'm like a sexual camel. That's not the point. 23 00:01:25,979 --> 00:01:28,015 At least there was the possibility. 24 00:01:28,179 --> 00:01:30,170 -You gonna break up with her? -l don't know. 25 00:01:30,339 --> 00:01:32,534 -l don't wanna be one of those guys. -What guys? 26 00:01:32,699 --> 00:01:34,610 Like us. 27 00:01:34,779 --> 00:01:37,577 -So it's just mono. -Mono? 28 00:01:37,739 --> 00:01:39,730 Well, if anybody needs any medical advice... 29 00:01:39,899 --> 00:01:43,812 ...Laney met a doctor, and he's unattached. 30 00:01:43,979 --> 00:01:46,618 l thought the whole dream of dating a doctor was debunked? 31 00:01:46,779 --> 00:01:50,135 No, it's not debunk. lt's totally bunk. 32 00:01:50,299 --> 00:01:52,688 lsn't bunk bad? Like, ''that's a lot of bunk''? 33 00:01:52,859 --> 00:01:54,815 No, something is bunk, then you debunk it. 34 00:01:54,979 --> 00:01:57,254 -What? -l think. 35 00:02:00,619 --> 00:02:05,374 Lookit. l'm dating a doctor, and l like it. Let's just move on. 36 00:02:07,579 --> 00:02:09,012 -Hello. Oh, hi, Katie. -Jerry. 37 00:02:09,179 --> 00:02:11,773 Something came up for Tuesday at the Dayton Civic Centre. 38 00:02:11,939 --> 00:02:15,170 -That's Ohio, Jerry. -l've heard of Ohio, Katie... 39 00:02:15,339 --> 00:02:18,331 ...but Tuesday's no good. l'm doing Career Day at my junior high. 40 00:02:18,539 --> 00:02:19,813 Okay, Jerry, that's fine. 41 00:02:19,979 --> 00:02:21,571 -All right. -Katie works for Jerry. 42 00:02:21,739 --> 00:02:24,811 -Yes, all right, Katie. Thank you. Yes. -Sorry for the late notice. 43 00:02:24,979 --> 00:02:26,697 -Bye. Bye. -Okay, you're the-- 44 00:02:29,659 --> 00:02:32,537 -They asked you to do Career Day? -Yeah, it's no big thing. 45 00:02:32,699 --> 00:02:34,371 With due respect, l went there... 46 00:02:34,539 --> 00:02:36,609 ...and l work for a World Series-winning team. 47 00:02:36,779 --> 00:02:38,576 And you were integral. 48 00:02:45,259 --> 00:02:48,888 Jerry, so nice of you to come down here. 49 00:02:49,059 --> 00:02:50,208 l'm on next, right? 50 00:02:50,379 --> 00:02:54,418 Well, unfortunately, Mr. Amiry, from the Bronx Zoo.... 51 00:02:54,579 --> 00:02:57,651 -The guy with the lizard? -Yes. 52 00:02:57,819 --> 00:03:02,574 Well, he started feeding it crickets, and the children just love him... 53 00:03:02,739 --> 00:03:04,297 ...and we're out of time. 54 00:03:06,499 --> 00:03:08,933 So can you come back tomorrow? 55 00:03:09,499 --> 00:03:14,015 l'm getting bumped? You're bumping me from Career Day? 56 00:03:15,819 --> 00:03:19,448 So do most doctors like ER, or do you guys just think it's fake? 57 00:03:19,619 --> 00:03:22,531 l couldn't tell you. You know, l'm not really a doctor. 58 00:03:22,699 --> 00:03:24,417 Then l'm not really attracted you. 59 00:03:27,859 --> 00:03:29,850 l'm serious, Elaine. l went to med school... 60 00:03:30,019 --> 00:03:32,852 ...but l still have to pass my licensing exam. 61 00:03:33,459 --> 00:03:34,892 When do you take this exam? 62 00:03:35,059 --> 00:03:39,257 l've taken it three times. l almost passed the last one. 63 00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:43,173 But you're basically a doctor. l mean, people do call you doctor? 64 00:03:43,339 --> 00:03:45,978 -Well.... -Can l introduce you as doctor? 65 00:03:46,139 --> 00:03:48,812 -Yeah. -All right. That's all l wanted to know. 66 00:03:50,899 --> 00:03:52,298 Mono. 67 00:03:55,219 --> 00:03:56,208 lt was fantastic. 68 00:03:56,379 --> 00:03:59,530 -We wound up talking all night. -You're enjoying the not enjoying. 69 00:03:59,699 --> 00:04:03,931 You know, just by conversing, you can really learn a lot about a person. 70 00:04:04,099 --> 00:04:05,612 l'm finding that out. 71 00:04:06,259 --> 00:04:07,453 -Hey, buddy. -Hey. 72 00:04:07,619 --> 00:04:08,813 How was Career Day? 73 00:04:08,979 --> 00:04:12,335 l didn't get on. The lizard guy went long. 74 00:04:13,019 --> 00:04:17,615 -You got bumped from Career Day? -lt was a mix-up, l'm sure. 75 00:04:18,299 --> 00:04:21,177 Sounds like they're trying to screw with your head. 76 00:04:21,339 --> 00:04:25,048 Now, why would a junior high school wanna screw with my head? 77 00:04:25,219 --> 00:04:27,494 Why does Radio Shack ask for your phone number... 78 00:04:27,659 --> 00:04:29,809 ...when you buy batteries? 79 00:04:31,299 --> 00:04:33,051 l don't know. 80 00:04:35,499 --> 00:04:37,615 Hey, hey. Kramer, what are you doing? 81 00:04:37,779 --> 00:04:40,293 -You can't smoke in here. -Oh, go on. 82 00:04:40,459 --> 00:04:45,214 -Hey, take it outside. -Come on, Larry. You know me. 83 00:04:45,379 --> 00:04:47,939 lt bothers people, and it's against the law. 84 00:04:48,099 --> 00:04:51,375 You can make all the laws you want. He's still gonna bother people. 85 00:04:59,979 --> 00:05:04,177 -What, did they kick you out too? -Yeah, they kicked us all out. 86 00:05:07,499 --> 00:05:09,569 Thanks for coming back. Graham cracker? 87 00:05:09,739 --> 00:05:11,411 No, let's just do it. 88 00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:14,334 What? What is going on? What is that about? 89 00:05:14,499 --> 00:05:18,208 Fire drill. Sorry. Single file, everyone. 90 00:05:18,379 --> 00:05:21,849 -But l was promised a slot. -Single file, Jerry. 91 00:05:28,979 --> 00:05:30,492 Fire drill. You believe that? 92 00:05:30,659 --> 00:05:33,412 -Who is Pericles? -Pericles is correct. 93 00:05:33,579 --> 00:05:35,615 Like fire in a school is such a big deal. 94 00:05:37,019 --> 00:05:39,010 -You got any matches? -Middle drawer. 95 00:05:39,179 --> 00:05:41,010 Who is Sir Arthur Conan Doyle? 96 00:05:41,179 --> 00:05:43,090 We were looking for Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. 97 00:05:43,259 --> 00:05:44,533 Thanks. 98 00:05:45,819 --> 00:05:47,537 -Hello. Oh, hi, Katie. -Jerry. 99 00:05:47,699 --> 00:05:50,293 l heard what happened at the school. They can't bump you. 100 00:05:50,459 --> 00:05:54,054 -That is so unprofessional. -Oh, relax, Katie. lt's not a problem. 101 00:05:54,219 --> 00:05:56,210 -What is Borax? -Yes, you are right. 102 00:05:56,379 --> 00:05:57,812 They bump you in junior high... 103 00:05:57,979 --> 00:06:01,210 ...next, you're being bumped in high schools, colleges, trade schools. 104 00:06:01,379 --> 00:06:03,973 Before you know it, Letterman won't return your calls. 105 00:06:04,539 --> 00:06:06,734 -You got an ashtray? -l don't have any ashtrays. 106 00:06:06,899 --> 00:06:08,855 Cereal bowls. 107 00:06:09,019 --> 00:06:11,135 Jerry, don't freak out. I'll tak e care of you. 108 00:06:11,299 --> 00:06:13,529 -Katie, don't-- -All right. Thanks. 109 00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:16,967 What is tungsten or wolfram? 110 00:06:24,659 --> 00:06:26,615 ls this a repeat? 111 00:06:26,779 --> 00:06:29,418 No, no, no. Just lately l've been thinking a lot clearer. 112 00:06:29,579 --> 00:06:31,490 Like this afternoon-- What is chicken Kiev? 113 00:06:31,659 --> 00:06:35,732 --l really enjoyed watching a documentary with Louise. 114 00:06:35,899 --> 00:06:38,129 Louise. That's what's doing it. 115 00:06:39,099 --> 00:06:42,614 You're no longer preoccupied with sex, so your mind is able to focus. 116 00:06:45,219 --> 00:06:48,177 -You think? -Yeah. Let's say this is your brain. 117 00:06:48,339 --> 00:06:50,807 Okay? Now, from what l know about you... 118 00:06:50,979 --> 00:06:53,368 ...your brain consists of two parts. 119 00:06:53,539 --> 00:06:56,099 The intellect, represented here... 120 00:06:57,859 --> 00:07:00,293 ...and the part obsessed with sex. 121 00:07:01,899 --> 00:07:02,888 Now, granted... 122 00:07:03,059 --> 00:07:07,371 ...you have extracted an astonishing amount from this little scrap. 123 00:07:07,539 --> 00:07:11,612 But with no-sex Louise, this previously useless lump... 124 00:07:11,779 --> 00:07:15,567 ...is now functioning for the first time in its existence. 125 00:07:18,299 --> 00:07:19,891 Oh, my God. 126 00:07:20,059 --> 00:07:23,210 l just remembered where l left my retainer in second grade. 127 00:07:23,379 --> 00:07:24,971 l'll see you later. 128 00:07:27,499 --> 00:07:31,208 -Hey, l need some more matches. -What is going on in there? 129 00:07:31,379 --> 00:07:33,370 l met some people smoking on the street... 130 00:07:33,539 --> 00:07:35,814 ...so l invited them up to my apartment to smoke. 131 00:07:35,979 --> 00:07:38,698 -Why? -Somebody had to. 132 00:07:38,859 --> 00:07:42,169 Just because a person's a smoker doesn't mean he's not a human being. 133 00:07:42,339 --> 00:07:43,738 lt doesn't? 134 00:07:43,899 --> 00:07:46,333 These people aren't gonna let themselves be flicked... 135 00:07:46,499 --> 00:07:47,978 ...into the ashbin of society. 136 00:07:48,139 --> 00:07:50,369 -Why not? -Well, you can confine them. 137 00:07:50,539 --> 00:07:53,133 You can punish them. You can cram them into the corner... 138 00:07:53,299 --> 00:07:55,017 ...but they're not going away, Jerry. 139 00:07:56,219 --> 00:08:00,098 -All right. -Yeah. 140 00:08:01,579 --> 00:08:03,217 When they hand out those cadavers... 141 00:08:03,379 --> 00:08:05,256 ...do you choose if it's a man or woman? 142 00:08:05,419 --> 00:08:08,297 l don't know. Dead bodies really gross me out. 143 00:08:10,339 --> 00:08:12,216 -Oh, my God. -What's wrong? 144 00:08:12,379 --> 00:08:16,452 Oh, it's Sue Ellen Mischke, this old braless friend l hate. 145 00:08:16,979 --> 00:08:20,415 -Elaine? Hi. -Oh, hi, Sue Ellen, hi. 146 00:08:20,619 --> 00:08:25,090 Oh, Rick, this is an old, old friend of mine. Elaine Benes. 147 00:08:25,259 --> 00:08:28,535 Rick is a periodontist. He does Giuliani's gums. 148 00:08:29,659 --> 00:08:32,127 Well, this is my boyfriend, Dr. Ben Galvant. 149 00:08:32,299 --> 00:08:35,769 -Oh, well, l'm an intern. -Hey, stop kidding, Ben. 150 00:08:37,699 --> 00:08:41,055 He's a doctor. He's a very good doctor. 151 00:08:41,219 --> 00:08:44,177 Carlito's just passed out. Can anyone help? 152 00:08:44,339 --> 00:08:48,127 -Oh, there's a doctor right here. -No, there's not. 153 00:08:48,299 --> 00:08:50,335 Can't you at least tell them what to do? 154 00:08:50,499 --> 00:08:52,933 -Like what? -Shouldn't he elevate his legs? 155 00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:55,767 Right. Elevate your legs. 156 00:09:01,979 --> 00:09:04,652 l hope Carlito feels better. 157 00:09:04,819 --> 00:09:08,368 -Ben really wishes he could've helped. -l thought he was a doctor. 158 00:09:08,539 --> 00:09:10,131 Oh, he is. 159 00:09:10,419 --> 00:09:12,250 You know, kind of. 160 00:09:12,819 --> 00:09:15,970 l mean, l call him doctor. 161 00:09:20,419 --> 00:09:21,932 George. 162 00:09:24,019 --> 00:09:27,409 Of course, absolute zero. 163 00:09:30,939 --> 00:09:34,488 -What? What is with all these books? -l stopped having sex. 164 00:09:37,699 --> 00:09:40,213 All right. l'll see you, Phil. l've got room for two... 165 00:09:40,379 --> 00:09:43,496 ...but the only thing l have is in the non-filter section. 166 00:09:43,699 --> 00:09:44,893 Hey, hey, how you doing? 167 00:09:45,059 --> 00:09:47,050 What, you got a smokers' lounge in there? 168 00:09:47,219 --> 00:09:49,733 Oh, yeah, people really seem to be enjoying themselves. 169 00:09:49,899 --> 00:09:52,811 You know, they come in once, it's like they're addicted. 170 00:09:53,899 --> 00:09:57,938 Jerry. Oh, there you are. You didn't answer your phone. 171 00:09:58,099 --> 00:10:00,169 l was out. 172 00:10:00,339 --> 00:10:02,409 Jerry, great news. 173 00:10:02,579 --> 00:10:07,209 -l got you an assembly. -An assembly? 174 00:10:07,779 --> 00:10:11,328 Two hours in front of the entire junior high, grades six through eight. 175 00:10:11,499 --> 00:10:13,933 -That's sixth grade, seventh grade-- -l understand. 176 00:10:14,099 --> 00:10:16,567 But what am l gonna talk about for two hours? 177 00:10:16,739 --> 00:10:20,618 And it is already in the school paper. They cancelled Rick James. 178 00:10:21,019 --> 00:10:24,409 -''Super Freak''? -Yes. 179 00:10:24,579 --> 00:10:27,298 What is your answer to number 7 4? 180 00:10:27,459 --> 00:10:31,008 -Metabolic acidosis. -No. 181 00:10:31,179 --> 00:10:33,818 Hypokalemia. 182 00:10:34,139 --> 00:10:36,175 Not metabolic acidosis. 183 00:10:38,539 --> 00:10:41,007 Oh, man, l'm never gonna pass this thing. 184 00:10:41,179 --> 00:10:44,967 Oh, yes, you are. We'll just stop having sex. 185 00:10:46,579 --> 00:10:50,970 You guys. Hitting is not about muscle. lt's simple physics. 186 00:10:51,139 --> 00:10:54,176 Calculate the velocity, V, in relation to the trajectory, T... 187 00:10:54,339 --> 00:10:57,376 ...in which, G, gravity, of course, remains a constant. 188 00:11:02,019 --> 00:11:04,408 -lt's not complicated. -Now, who are you again? 189 00:11:04,579 --> 00:11:08,413 George Costanza, assistant to the travelling secretary. 190 00:11:09,539 --> 00:11:12,690 Are you the guy who put us in that Ramada in Milwaukee? 191 00:11:12,859 --> 00:11:15,692 You wanna talk about hotels, or you wanna win some ball games? 192 00:11:15,859 --> 00:11:17,292 Hey, we won the World Series. 193 00:11:18,139 --> 00:11:20,016 ln six games. 194 00:11:26,299 --> 00:11:29,416 So if you like to tell jokes, and you love to make people laugh... 195 00:11:29,579 --> 00:11:32,969 ...stand-up comedy may be the career for you. 196 00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:38,337 Thank you. 197 00:11:41,979 --> 00:11:43,890 Nine minutes. 198 00:11:45,099 --> 00:11:46,612 How am l gonna fill two hours? 199 00:11:46,779 --> 00:11:49,577 Hello? l could take an hour off your hands. 200 00:11:49,739 --> 00:11:51,616 Let the kids see a real, live Yankee. 201 00:11:51,779 --> 00:11:54,691 And give you the chance to see some real disappointed kids. 202 00:11:57,259 --> 00:11:58,692 Yes, l take your order, please? 203 00:11:58,859 --> 00:12:02,090 Excuse me, darling, do l--? Do l detect a Portuguese accent? 204 00:12:10,459 --> 00:12:12,051 No, don't mention it. 205 00:12:13,259 --> 00:12:16,774 -Portuguese? -Yeah, my cleaning lady is Portuguese. 206 00:12:16,939 --> 00:12:18,850 l must have picked it up. 207 00:12:19,019 --> 00:12:21,010 How come he's getting so smart? 208 00:12:21,179 --> 00:12:23,329 l stopped having sex with Ben three days ago... 209 00:12:23,499 --> 00:12:25,808 ...and l don't know no Portuguese. 210 00:12:28,539 --> 00:12:31,497 -Are you all right? -l don't know. l just-- 211 00:12:31,659 --> 00:12:35,538 The last couple of days my mind has been kind of, you know... 212 00:12:40,859 --> 00:12:42,815 ...not good. 213 00:12:42,979 --> 00:12:44,810 Wait a second. l know what's happening. 214 00:12:44,979 --> 00:12:47,732 The no-sex thing is having the reverse affect on you. 215 00:12:47,899 --> 00:12:50,015 What? What are you talking about? 216 00:12:50,179 --> 00:12:52,090 To a woman, sex is like the garbage man. 217 00:12:52,259 --> 00:12:55,296 You take for granted that when you put some trash on the street... 218 00:12:55,459 --> 00:12:58,292 ...a guy in a jumpsuit's gonna come along and pick it up. 219 00:12:59,499 --> 00:13:02,935 But now, no sex, it's like a garbage strike. 220 00:13:03,099 --> 00:13:06,933 The bags are piling up in your head. The sidewalk is blocked. 221 00:13:07,099 --> 00:13:09,818 Nothing's getting through. You're stupid. 222 00:13:09,979 --> 00:13:12,698 -l don't understand. -Exactly. 223 00:13:18,939 --> 00:13:20,338 -Hey, buddy. -Hey. 224 00:13:20,499 --> 00:13:23,411 Hey, you should come over. Tonight's pipe night. 225 00:13:24,939 --> 00:13:27,499 -What happened to your face? -What? 226 00:13:27,659 --> 00:13:30,412 lt looks like an old catcher's mitt. 227 00:13:31,219 --> 00:13:32,618 What? 228 00:13:36,659 --> 00:13:42,017 Look at that. My face is all craggily. lt's crinkly. 229 00:13:42,179 --> 00:13:43,976 lt's from all that smoke. 230 00:13:44,139 --> 00:13:46,937 You've experienced a lifetime of smoking in 7 2 hours. 231 00:13:47,099 --> 00:13:48,373 What did you expect? 232 00:13:48,859 --> 00:13:52,454 Emphysema, birth defects, cancer, but not this. 233 00:13:53,779 --> 00:13:56,373 Jerry, you know, my face is my livelihood. 234 00:13:59,179 --> 00:14:01,534 Everything l have l owe to this face. 235 00:14:01,699 --> 00:14:05,248 lt's my allure, my twinkle, you know. 236 00:14:05,859 --> 00:14:08,453 You know, and your teeth, your teeth are all brown. 237 00:14:10,699 --> 00:14:13,259 Look away, l'm-- l'm hideous. 238 00:14:21,179 --> 00:14:25,172 Hey, Ben, l need a four-letter word. 239 00:14:25,339 --> 00:14:28,490 ''Winnie-the-'' blank. 240 00:14:28,659 --> 00:14:32,174 -Pooh. -Poo. 241 00:14:35,459 --> 00:14:37,848 No, it's Winnie-the-Pooh. 242 00:14:43,019 --> 00:14:44,452 So the hospital called. 243 00:14:44,619 --> 00:14:47,577 Turns out some stupid intern screwed up my test. 244 00:14:47,739 --> 00:14:49,969 l never had mono. 245 00:14:50,139 --> 00:14:53,814 So now we can, you know. 246 00:15:00,459 --> 00:15:01,733 So, what did you do? 247 00:15:01,899 --> 00:15:04,254 l told her l would have to think about it. 248 00:15:04,979 --> 00:15:08,096 But ultimately you're gonna choose in favour of sex, right? 249 00:15:08,699 --> 00:15:12,977 l don't know. Perhaps l can better serve the world this way. 250 00:15:13,739 --> 00:15:17,095 You mean, not subjecting women to your sexual advances? 251 00:15:18,779 --> 00:15:21,054 A simple joke from a simple man. 252 00:15:22,579 --> 00:15:24,490 So you're never gonna have sex again? 253 00:15:24,659 --> 00:15:25,648 Well, Jerry... 254 00:15:25,819 --> 00:15:29,607 ...there was a pretty good chance l was never gonna have sex again anyway. 255 00:15:29,779 --> 00:15:32,771 You ready for the assembly and what you'll say about the Yankees? 256 00:15:33,419 --> 00:15:36,411 Sports are so pedestrian. l prepared some science experiments... 257 00:15:36,579 --> 00:15:39,377 ...that will illuminate the mind and dazzle the eye. 258 00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:43,088 l wrote a 20-minute bit about how homework stinks. 259 00:15:45,019 --> 00:15:48,375 Oh, my vacation was restful, resplendent, magnificent. 260 00:15:48,539 --> 00:15:50,894 ln fact, next time l'm planning on going to Corfu. 261 00:15:51,899 --> 00:15:53,093 Oh, no. 262 00:15:53,259 --> 00:15:54,772 -We gotta talk. -No way, Kramer. 263 00:15:54,939 --> 00:15:57,897 You brought me only misfortune and humiliation. Now, get out. 264 00:15:58,059 --> 00:15:59,731 -But, Jackie. -l said, out. 265 00:15:59,899 --> 00:16:02,732 Jackie, l think l got a case against the tobacco companies. 266 00:16:04,019 --> 00:16:06,249 -The who? -The tobacco companies. 267 00:16:10,299 --> 00:16:12,654 l've been wanting a piece of them for years. 268 00:16:28,579 --> 00:16:31,855 Did that cigarette label mention any damage to your appearance? 269 00:16:32,019 --> 00:16:34,817 -No, no, it didn't say anything. -So you were a victim... 270 00:16:34,979 --> 00:16:38,176 ...and now your face is sallow, unattractive, disgusting. 271 00:16:39,219 --> 00:16:44,691 -So, Jackie, you think we got a case? -Your face is my case. 272 00:16:52,219 --> 00:16:54,130 -Hey. -Hey, how are you doing? 273 00:16:54,299 --> 00:16:56,767 Not good. l'm a moron. 274 00:16:57,739 --> 00:16:58,728 Don't worry about it. 275 00:16:58,899 --> 00:17:01,732 Once he passes the test, you'll have sex and you'll be fine. 276 00:17:02,059 --> 00:17:05,051 Well, that kind of brings us to why l'm here. 277 00:17:06,139 --> 00:17:08,209 You got 1 1 minutes? 278 00:17:09,699 --> 00:17:11,257 What for? 279 00:17:15,139 --> 00:17:16,492 Oh, come on. 280 00:17:16,659 --> 00:17:19,696 l just wanna clear my head. lt has nothing to do with you. 281 00:17:21,019 --> 00:17:23,692 l think it has something to do with me. 282 00:17:23,859 --> 00:17:27,647 You could read the paper through the whole thing, if you want. 283 00:17:29,419 --> 00:17:33,298 No, no, no. l'm sorry. This is too weird. 284 00:17:34,099 --> 00:17:36,249 All right. 285 00:17:36,419 --> 00:17:38,410 ls Kramer home? 286 00:17:41,419 --> 00:17:43,774 You know, Louise, l think you'll find this amusing. 287 00:17:43,939 --> 00:17:48,455 -ln early Euclidean geometry they-- -George, l have to have sex. 288 00:17:48,619 --> 00:17:50,496 l used to share that very same outlook... 289 00:17:50,659 --> 00:17:52,968 ...but now l have so many things to occupy my mind. 290 00:17:53,139 --> 00:17:56,495 -For instance, the atom. -Goodbye, George. 291 00:17:56,659 --> 00:17:58,729 l hate you. 292 00:18:00,579 --> 00:18:02,934 Fascinating turn of events. 293 00:18:08,979 --> 00:18:12,813 Ms. Wilkie, your tobacco company has turned this beautiful specimen... 294 00:18:12,979 --> 00:18:15,777 ...into a horrible, twisted freak. 295 00:18:17,419 --> 00:18:18,693 Who could love me? 296 00:18:20,939 --> 00:18:27,014 l disagree. ln fact, l feel Mr. Kramer projects a rugged masculinity. 297 00:18:30,499 --> 00:18:33,332 Rugged? The man's a goblin. 298 00:18:33,499 --> 00:18:35,569 He's only been exposed to smoke for four days. 299 00:18:35,739 --> 00:18:39,493 By the time this case gets to trial, he'll be nothing more than a shrunken head. 300 00:18:41,139 --> 00:18:44,529 All right, Mr. Chiles, you'll have our offer by tomorrow. 301 00:18:44,699 --> 00:18:47,452 -Good day, gentlemen. -Yeah, bye-bye. 302 00:18:47,899 --> 00:18:51,130 Jackie. Jackie, you did it. We're rich. 303 00:18:51,299 --> 00:18:55,053 You better believe it. Jackie's cashing in on your wretched disfigurement. 304 00:18:58,299 --> 00:19:01,291 Congratulations! You passed. 305 00:19:01,459 --> 00:19:04,929 Elaine, Elaine, l don't think we should see each other anymore. 306 00:19:05,259 --> 00:19:07,250 What? You're breaking me up with me? 307 00:19:07,419 --> 00:19:11,458 But l sacrificed and supported you while you struggled. 308 00:19:12,059 --> 00:19:14,334 What about my dream of dating a doctor? 309 00:19:14,499 --> 00:19:17,571 l'm sorry, Elaine. l always knew that after l became a doctor... 310 00:19:17,739 --> 00:19:20,458 ...l would dump whoever l was with and find someone better. 311 00:19:20,619 --> 00:19:23,975 That's the dream of becoming a doctor. 312 00:19:24,859 --> 00:19:27,896 Lookit. Are we gonna have sex or not? 313 00:19:30,299 --> 00:19:33,530 Jerry, when the glee club's finished singing, George goes on, then you. 314 00:19:33,699 --> 00:19:36,930 -Hey. -Where have you been? You're on next. 315 00:19:37,099 --> 00:19:38,532 l got lost on the way over. 316 00:19:38,699 --> 00:19:42,738 Got lost? We went to school here for three years. 317 00:19:43,259 --> 00:19:47,457 What are these? Take me to your leader. 318 00:19:49,899 --> 00:19:52,618 Oh, my God, you had sex. 319 00:19:53,899 --> 00:19:58,893 -You had sex with Louise. -No, the Portuguese waitress. 320 00:19:59,059 --> 00:20:00,777 The Portuguese waitress? 321 00:20:00,939 --> 00:20:03,612 l calculated my odds of ever getting together... 322 00:20:03,779 --> 00:20:07,658 ...with a Portuguese waitress. Mathematically, l had to do it, Jerry. 323 00:20:07,819 --> 00:20:09,047 George, George, you're on. 324 00:20:09,219 --> 00:20:12,097 -Oh, l'm not going on. -What did you come down here for? 325 00:20:12,259 --> 00:20:14,773 To tell you about the Portuguese waitress. 326 00:20:15,579 --> 00:20:17,251 lt's good to have you back. 327 00:20:17,419 --> 00:20:21,492 -One of you has to go on. -All right. l'll do it. 328 00:20:24,139 --> 00:20:27,051 Hey, kids, what's the deal with homework? 329 00:20:27,219 --> 00:20:29,494 You're not working on your home. 330 00:20:33,499 --> 00:20:35,694 That was a great lunch, Jackie. Thanks. 331 00:20:35,859 --> 00:20:38,054 lt's puzzling we haven't gotten that offer yet. 332 00:20:38,379 --> 00:20:41,098 Well, Mrs. Wilkie from the tobacco company called me. 333 00:20:41,259 --> 00:20:42,533 And we had a little powwow. 334 00:20:42,699 --> 00:20:44,610 A powwow? Who told you to have a powwow? 335 00:20:44,779 --> 00:20:46,929 l didn't tell you to have a powwow. 336 00:20:47,099 --> 00:20:49,374 -She made an offer. l took it. -How much? 337 00:20:49,539 --> 00:20:52,736 -No, no, no. There was no money. -No money? Then, what did we get? 338 00:20:54,619 --> 00:20:56,337 Check it out. 339 00:21:00,379 --> 00:21:03,655 This is the most public yet of my many humiliations. 340 00:21:10,899 --> 00:21:14,016 Cancelled? But l was supposed to be on tomorrow night. 341 00:21:14,179 --> 00:21:16,647 Yeah, but then, some people were telling me about... 342 00:21:16,819 --> 00:21:20,334 ...that little flap out there at the junior high school assembly. 343 00:21:21,939 --> 00:21:25,215 And before that, you were bumped by a lizard? 344 00:21:26,259 --> 00:21:28,454 lt was a-- Actually, it was a monitor lizard. 345 00:21:28,619 --> 00:21:30,610 Those things, deadly, dangerous. 346 00:21:30,779 --> 00:21:34,408 A long time ago, my uncle and a date are driving, like, through Mexico. 347 00:21:34,579 --> 00:21:35,898 They see one on the road. 348 00:21:36,059 --> 00:21:38,334 Drags him out of the car and chews his face off. 349 00:21:38,779 --> 00:21:41,498 Listen. We'll call you if anything opens up. Okay, Jimmy? 350 00:21:41,659 --> 00:21:44,048 -Jerry. -Right. Jerry.