1 00:00:08,693 --> 00:00:10,809 - Hey. - Morning. 2 00:00:10,973 --> 00:00:14,409 Oh, this is crazy. You know, I can't go on like this. 3 00:00:14,573 --> 00:00:18,168 - But why? - I need some space. 4 00:00:20,253 --> 00:00:22,005 Does that mean I have to go too? 5 00:00:22,213 --> 00:00:24,408 Well, you don't think she's just talking to me. 6 00:00:24,573 --> 00:00:26,245 - Hey, shut up. - You shut up. 7 00:00:26,893 --> 00:00:28,087 I hate this. 8 00:00:28,853 --> 00:00:31,925 You'll get used to it. It's like a rugby scrum. 9 00:00:32,093 --> 00:00:35,085 - No. No, I don't want this anymore. - We're going to work with you. 10 00:00:35,253 --> 00:00:36,891 - And on your dates. - And shopping. 11 00:00:37,053 --> 00:00:38,327 And to the bathroom. 12 00:00:38,493 --> 00:00:40,404 - Elaine. Elaine. Elaine. - I can't breathe. 13 00:00:40,573 --> 00:00:43,087 - Elaine. Elaine. - I'm suffocating. I can't breathe. 14 00:00:43,253 --> 00:00:45,483 You're all killing me. 15 00:00:52,893 --> 00:00:55,361 Turn your alarm off. 16 00:01:04,213 --> 00:01:06,169 Your background is impressive, George. 17 00:01:06,333 --> 00:01:10,804 But how does it apply to what we do here at Kruger Industrial Smoothing? 18 00:01:10,973 --> 00:01:14,204 Well, at the Yankees, it was all about smoothing things over... 19 00:01:14,373 --> 00:01:16,887 ...you know, chiselling away, grinding down. 20 00:01:17,053 --> 00:01:20,250 In fact, we used to call it the grind. 21 00:01:20,413 --> 00:01:24,372 It says here you worked at Play Now for four days. 22 00:01:24,533 --> 00:01:27,491 That should be a 14. Let me just... 23 00:01:29,573 --> 00:01:33,282 Well, George, I'll be honest. I could go either way on you. 24 00:01:34,773 --> 00:01:36,809 But what the hell, we need someone, huh? 25 00:01:36,973 --> 00:01:38,486 You won't regret this, sir. 26 00:01:38,973 --> 00:01:40,611 I don't care. 27 00:01:42,453 --> 00:01:45,286 Let's find you an office, huh? 28 00:01:53,373 --> 00:01:55,762 When I saw the photo I remembered where I'd seen him. 29 00:01:55,933 --> 00:01:57,048 The boom-box incident. 30 00:01:57,213 --> 00:01:58,771 The boom-box incident? 31 00:01:58,933 --> 00:02:00,764 Summer of '89, I'm at the beach. 32 00:02:00,933 --> 00:02:02,571 This family sets up next to me. 33 00:02:02,893 --> 00:02:05,088 I go into the surf. When I come out... 34 00:02:05,253 --> 00:02:08,643 ...my clothes, my towel, my umbrella, they're all gone. 35 00:02:08,813 --> 00:02:11,281 I am furious. I start screaming at these kids... 36 00:02:11,453 --> 00:02:13,808 ... demanding my stuff back and finally I lose it. 37 00:02:13,973 --> 00:02:17,886 I grab their boom box and I chuck it into the ocean. 38 00:02:18,133 --> 00:02:19,851 - Yeah. - Seems reasonable. 39 00:02:21,133 --> 00:02:23,647 Then I see my clothes floating out there. 40 00:02:23,813 --> 00:02:26,407 The tide took them out, not the kids. 41 00:02:26,573 --> 00:02:28,245 Even more reasonable. 42 00:02:28,413 --> 00:02:30,404 So now the father is screaming at me. 43 00:02:30,573 --> 00:02:32,404 He's demanding I pay for the boom box. 44 00:02:32,573 --> 00:02:36,691 So finally I gave him a fake address and got the hell out of there. 45 00:02:36,853 --> 00:02:38,809 And that guy is your new boss? 46 00:02:38,973 --> 00:02:41,362 Until that stupid photo jogs his memory. 47 00:02:41,533 --> 00:02:45,048 Kruger. That's not Kruger Industrial Smoothing, is it? 48 00:02:45,213 --> 00:02:47,807 - Yeah. - Yeah, grinders, sanders, whetstones. 49 00:02:47,973 --> 00:02:50,009 They botched the Statue of Liberty job. 50 00:02:50,173 --> 00:02:52,482 Right. They couldn't get the green stuff off. 51 00:02:52,653 --> 00:02:55,690 It is a horrible company. There is no management whatsoever. 52 00:02:55,853 --> 00:02:58,003 I could go hog-wild in there. 53 00:02:58,493 --> 00:03:00,563 You know what to do? You sneak that photo out... 54 00:03:00,733 --> 00:03:02,803 ...for a couple of days and get it airbrushed. 55 00:03:02,973 --> 00:03:04,884 - Like retouched? - Remember the photo of me... 56 00:03:05,053 --> 00:03:06,771 ...and Gerald Ford and I took it in? 57 00:03:06,933 --> 00:03:09,493 Got that Ford right out of there. 58 00:03:10,093 --> 00:03:12,084 Oh, this is good. 59 00:03:12,253 --> 00:03:13,845 This Kruger guy is clueless. 60 00:03:14,013 --> 00:03:16,573 I can't wait to work for him. 61 00:03:17,453 --> 00:03:20,092 Jeez. Look at this. 62 00:03:20,253 --> 00:03:22,562 This sandwich is terrible. 63 00:03:22,733 --> 00:03:25,850 Everywhere you go they always give you these misshaped, shoddy meats. 64 00:03:26,013 --> 00:03:27,685 Look, look, look. 65 00:03:29,133 --> 00:03:32,728 I haven't had a decent sandwich in 13 years. 66 00:03:32,893 --> 00:03:34,770 Neither have I. 67 00:03:38,893 --> 00:03:42,249 Hey. Well, our meat problems are solved. 68 00:03:43,133 --> 00:03:45,772 - Where'd you get this thing? - I traded in my sausage press. 69 00:03:45,933 --> 00:03:48,731 I mean, look how thin that is. See, that's all surface area. 70 00:03:48,893 --> 00:03:51,361 The taste has nowhere to hide. 71 00:03:53,133 --> 00:03:54,725 - Hey. - Hey. Slice? 72 00:03:55,293 --> 00:03:56,885 Welcome to flavour country. 73 00:03:57,053 --> 00:03:58,247 Hey, that's pretty good. 74 00:03:59,453 --> 00:04:01,364 Hey, I got a date with that doctor you met. 75 00:04:01,893 --> 00:04:03,884 Sara Sitarides? 76 00:04:06,253 --> 00:04:07,288 What's with you? 77 00:04:07,853 --> 00:04:09,764 Remember that next-door neighbour of mine? 78 00:04:09,933 --> 00:04:12,083 The apartment that always smells like potatoes? 79 00:04:12,253 --> 00:04:14,323 Your whole building smells like potatoes. 80 00:04:14,493 --> 00:04:19,248 This jackass goes to Paris, leaves her alarm on. 81 00:04:19,493 --> 00:04:22,326 It's been beeping since 3:30 this morning. 82 00:04:22,533 --> 00:04:26,811 You know, that happened to Lomez, so he blew his neighbour's circuit. 83 00:04:27,133 --> 00:04:29,089 - How did he do that? - Yeah, well, it's easy. 84 00:04:29,253 --> 00:04:32,563 Just let me finish this mile- high and I'll be right with you. 85 00:04:33,293 --> 00:04:35,204 Oh, we're gonna need a case of Kaiser Rolls. 86 00:04:35,373 --> 00:04:37,489 I think we might have one left in the stockroom. 87 00:04:42,973 --> 00:04:44,611 This hallway smells like potatoes. 88 00:04:44,773 --> 00:04:46,968 - I know. I know. This is it. - Okay. 89 00:04:47,133 --> 00:04:51,126 Oh, see, this socket, it's probably connected to her apartment. 90 00:04:51,613 --> 00:04:52,728 So, what we'll do... 91 00:04:54,133 --> 00:04:55,566 ...we'll take this paper clip... 92 00:04:55,733 --> 00:04:59,772 ...and we'll bend it so it'll short out the entire circuit. 93 00:04:59,933 --> 00:05:01,332 There you go. 94 00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:05,203 - I think I'll let you do it. - No, no. It's easy. 95 00:05:05,373 --> 00:05:06,965 Just do it quickly. 96 00:05:08,013 --> 00:05:09,366 No, I really don't want to. 97 00:05:09,533 --> 00:05:10,807 Well, I don't want to either. 98 00:05:10,973 --> 00:05:14,124 - I thought you've done this before. - Yeah, well, I have, it's just... 99 00:05:14,293 --> 00:05:16,090 ...it's no picnic. 100 00:05:16,253 --> 00:05:18,528 - How are we gonna do it? - All right, all right. 101 00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:20,729 Fine, fine. I'll do it. 102 00:05:29,733 --> 00:05:31,689 - Oh, mama. - Are you okay? 103 00:05:31,853 --> 00:05:33,332 I'm gonna lose that nail. 104 00:05:36,773 --> 00:05:38,365 I enjoy the challenge of medicine. 105 00:05:38,533 --> 00:05:42,162 You'd have no idea what it's like to have someone's life depend on you. 106 00:05:42,333 --> 00:05:43,846 Well, I have this neighbour. 107 00:05:44,973 --> 00:05:46,486 A joke. 108 00:05:46,653 --> 00:05:49,850 Do you have any idea what it feels like to save someone's life? 109 00:05:50,013 --> 00:05:52,163 Is it anything like hitting a homer in softball? 110 00:05:53,253 --> 00:05:56,723 - No. - Because I hit a whomper last week. 111 00:05:58,973 --> 00:06:02,443 Here you go. Airbrushed you into sand and sky. 112 00:06:04,733 --> 00:06:06,371 What did you do here? 113 00:06:06,813 --> 00:06:08,246 You took out the wrong guy. 114 00:06:10,053 --> 00:06:11,725 Thought you said you wanted to be out. 115 00:06:11,893 --> 00:06:14,327 But I'm still here. You took out the other guy. 116 00:06:17,693 --> 00:06:19,206 You've really lost a lot of hair. 117 00:06:19,373 --> 00:06:21,409 I am aware. 118 00:06:25,933 --> 00:06:28,003 The world's best pizza cutter. 119 00:06:28,453 --> 00:06:29,852 Seventy-six bucks. 120 00:06:30,013 --> 00:06:31,924 How often do I mak e...? 121 00:06:33,053 --> 00:06:34,930 I've gotta buy a book. 122 00:06:39,693 --> 00:06:41,490 The cat. 123 00:06:43,613 --> 00:06:44,887 He took out Kruger? 124 00:06:45,053 --> 00:06:48,329 I just pray Kruger doesn't realize it's gone until this guy can fix it. 125 00:06:49,053 --> 00:06:50,645 This slicer is indomitable. 126 00:06:50,813 --> 00:06:52,246 Where'd you get that coat? 127 00:06:52,413 --> 00:06:54,881 You buy enough meat, they'll give you anything. 128 00:06:55,373 --> 00:06:56,886 Kramer? 129 00:06:57,253 --> 00:06:58,845 My neighbour has a cat. 130 00:06:59,013 --> 00:07:02,005 When you blew the power, we must have shut off the automatic feeder. 131 00:07:02,173 --> 00:07:04,562 See, that's the same thing that happened to Lomez. 132 00:07:05,533 --> 00:07:06,648 What did he do about it? 133 00:07:06,813 --> 00:07:10,806 Well, he moved into a motel and the cat eventually died. 134 00:07:12,013 --> 00:07:14,573 Well, this meowing is absolutely worse than the alarm. 135 00:07:14,733 --> 00:07:17,042 Oh, well, that's a prickly one. 136 00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:21,284 - How was the doctor date? - It died on the table. 137 00:07:22,053 --> 00:07:25,443 She spent an hour and a half making me feel like I'm worthless. 138 00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:27,331 Well, you know, she's very focused. 139 00:07:27,493 --> 00:07:28,721 Dermatology is her life. 140 00:07:30,813 --> 00:07:32,531 Dermatology? 141 00:07:32,693 --> 00:07:34,729 Yes. She's a dermatologist. 142 00:07:34,893 --> 00:07:36,451 Saving lives? 143 00:07:36,613 --> 00:07:40,208 The whole profession is, "Just put some aloe on it." 144 00:07:40,653 --> 00:07:42,769 The slicer. Elaine. Let's go. 145 00:07:42,933 --> 00:07:44,491 - Where are we going? - The cat. 146 00:07:44,653 --> 00:07:47,213 Just grab that meat and let's ride. 147 00:07:49,533 --> 00:07:51,125 When are you going on your next date? 148 00:07:51,293 --> 00:07:52,726 Oh, what's the point? 149 00:07:52,893 --> 00:07:54,565 You're gonna pass up an opportunity... 150 00:07:54,733 --> 00:07:56,963 ...to put that aloe- pusher in her place? 151 00:07:57,493 --> 00:07:58,642 A revenge date? 152 00:07:58,813 --> 00:08:00,690 That sounds more like you than me. 153 00:08:01,133 --> 00:08:03,931 This could be so sweet, Jerry. Saving lives? 154 00:08:04,093 --> 00:08:07,210 She's one step above working at the Clinique counter. 155 00:08:08,933 --> 00:08:11,288 Dermatologists. Skin doesn't need a doctor. 156 00:08:11,453 --> 00:08:15,128 Of course not. Wash it, dry it, move on. 157 00:08:15,693 --> 00:08:18,002 You're right. I'm gonna call her up and tell her off. 158 00:08:18,173 --> 00:08:21,051 Oh, no, no, no. This has to be carefully orchestrated. 159 00:08:21,213 --> 00:08:23,204 You go to a fancy dinner, flowers. 160 00:08:23,373 --> 00:08:26,570 - Flowers? - Yeah. You gotta do it classy. 161 00:08:27,333 --> 00:08:28,368 So you've done this? 162 00:08:28,533 --> 00:08:30,205 Almost. 163 00:08:31,213 --> 00:08:34,330 Couldn't get the girl to go out with me a second time. 164 00:08:37,053 --> 00:08:39,044 I think we're looking at half a millimetre. 165 00:08:40,493 --> 00:08:41,846 Can it cut that thin? 166 00:08:42,013 --> 00:08:45,688 Oh, I've cut slices so thin I couldn't even see them. 167 00:08:46,173 --> 00:08:48,129 How'd you know you cut it? 168 00:08:49,213 --> 00:08:52,046 Well, I guess I just assumed. 169 00:08:54,133 --> 00:08:55,851 Don't worry, kitty. Dinner's coming. 170 00:08:56,013 --> 00:08:58,481 Look at that, huh? That's a hall of famer. 171 00:08:58,653 --> 00:09:01,008 - All right, let's do it. - Yeah, all right, here we go. 172 00:09:01,173 --> 00:09:03,733 - Yeah, watch this baby slide. - Okay. 173 00:09:03,893 --> 00:09:07,488 - Come on, come on. - Go ahead. Go, kitty. Go. 174 00:09:09,133 --> 00:09:11,442 Oh, my God, it worked. 175 00:09:11,613 --> 00:09:14,332 - Can I borrow that thing for a while? - Oh, I don't think so. 176 00:09:14,493 --> 00:09:17,007 - Why not? - Well, you're not checked out on it. 177 00:09:17,213 --> 00:09:18,282 What do I have to know? 178 00:09:18,453 --> 00:09:19,886 Well, where the meat goes. 179 00:09:20,053 --> 00:09:21,042 Right there? 180 00:09:21,213 --> 00:09:22,487 Where do you turn it on? 181 00:09:23,053 --> 00:09:24,042 Right there. 182 00:09:24,213 --> 00:09:26,169 But where does the meat go? 183 00:09:28,933 --> 00:09:32,050 The restaurant, flowers. This is so nice. 184 00:09:32,213 --> 00:09:34,568 Well, I'm a classy guy. 185 00:09:35,253 --> 00:09:37,687 - How's the life- saving business? - It's fine. 186 00:09:37,853 --> 00:09:42,005 It must take a really, really big zit to kill a man. 187 00:09:42,213 --> 00:09:44,010 What is with you? 188 00:09:44,173 --> 00:09:47,927 You call yourself life saver. I call you Pimple Popper, M.D. 189 00:09:48,093 --> 00:09:49,446 Dr. Sitarides? 190 00:09:49,613 --> 00:09:51,205 Mr. Parry, how are you? 191 00:09:51,373 --> 00:09:54,649 I just wanted to thank you again for saving my life. 192 00:09:54,813 --> 00:09:56,166 She saved your life? 193 00:09:56,333 --> 00:09:59,643 - I had skin cancer. - Skin cancer. 194 00:09:59,813 --> 00:10:01,292 Damn. 195 00:10:02,493 --> 00:10:06,168 You were right, Kramer, this slicer is absolutely amazing. 196 00:10:09,573 --> 00:10:12,645 Yeah, Yeah. No, no, no, I'll bring it by tonight. 197 00:10:13,333 --> 00:10:15,210 Okay. Bye. 198 00:10:18,173 --> 00:10:20,084 These heels are so uneven. 199 00:10:25,613 --> 00:10:27,046 Here you go, Mr. Costanza. 200 00:10:31,333 --> 00:10:32,971 What is this? 201 00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:34,964 This is a drawing. 202 00:10:35,453 --> 00:10:37,045 It looks real, doesn't it? 203 00:10:37,213 --> 00:10:38,726 This is a cartoon. 204 00:10:38,893 --> 00:10:41,532 Hey. I had to draw that guy from memory. 205 00:10:41,693 --> 00:10:44,253 Considering, I think that's damn good. 206 00:10:44,413 --> 00:10:47,450 But it's not a photograph. I need a photograph. 207 00:10:47,613 --> 00:10:49,763 Then you better get a camera. 208 00:10:55,933 --> 00:10:57,651 He looks like a "Peanuts" character. 209 00:10:57,813 --> 00:11:01,931 I know. The only way to fix it now is to get a whole new photo of Kruger. 210 00:11:02,093 --> 00:11:03,924 - You could do that. - Without his shirt on? 211 00:11:04,093 --> 00:11:05,924 You can't do that. 212 00:11:06,573 --> 00:11:08,848 Well, maybe Kruger wasn't the place for you. 213 00:11:09,013 --> 00:11:11,766 - They seemed so disorganized. - I understand. 214 00:11:11,933 --> 00:11:14,401 What about the Coast Guard? 215 00:11:14,613 --> 00:11:17,002 Seems like a lot of pride there. A lot of tradition. 216 00:11:17,173 --> 00:11:18,322 True. 217 00:11:18,493 --> 00:11:19,767 You mean for you? 218 00:11:21,293 --> 00:11:24,251 - You think? - What about your seasickness? 219 00:11:24,893 --> 00:11:27,248 Maybe I could be a land guy. 220 00:11:27,933 --> 00:11:29,969 I don't know if they have land guys. 221 00:11:30,213 --> 00:11:34,286 Someone's gotta unhook the boat before it leaves the place. 222 00:11:36,173 --> 00:11:37,208 - Pliers? - Drawer. 223 00:11:37,853 --> 00:11:40,083 - Got it. - What are they for? 224 00:11:41,773 --> 00:11:44,048 I got a piece of my heel stuck in the slicer. 225 00:11:44,213 --> 00:11:46,681 - Come again? - Okay. I got a little slicer- happy. 226 00:11:46,853 --> 00:11:48,286 But don't tell Kramer, okay? 227 00:11:48,453 --> 00:11:51,604 He has very strong feelings for it. 228 00:11:51,773 --> 00:11:54,810 I almost forgot to ask you. How did the revenge date go? 229 00:11:55,493 --> 00:11:56,562 It went okay. 230 00:11:56,733 --> 00:11:58,610 Did you dress nice? Did you do it classy? 231 00:11:58,773 --> 00:12:00,172 Yeah, I started out real classy. 232 00:12:00,333 --> 00:12:02,767 Yeah, you did. You classed it up. 233 00:12:02,933 --> 00:12:05,322 But then I found out about the skin cancer. 234 00:12:05,493 --> 00:12:07,688 - Oh, so it backfired? - Yes. 235 00:12:08,493 --> 00:12:11,690 So I guess I'm lucky I never tried that myself. 236 00:12:11,853 --> 00:12:14,606 Of course she treats skin cancer. That's how I met her. 237 00:12:14,773 --> 00:12:16,968 She was doing a skin-cancer screening at Peterman. 238 00:12:17,133 --> 00:12:19,408 This is what dermatologists do. 239 00:12:19,573 --> 00:12:22,929 Sadly, that knowledge could have helped me. 240 00:12:23,893 --> 00:12:27,408 Wait a second. She did a skin-cancer screening at Peterman? 241 00:12:27,573 --> 00:12:29,848 - Could she do that at Kruger? - I don't know. I guess. 242 00:12:30,013 --> 00:12:33,050 So I set up a screening, everyone takes their shirt off... 243 00:12:33,213 --> 00:12:36,683 ...and click, I snap me a shot of a bare- chested Kruger. 244 00:12:37,293 --> 00:12:39,124 Do you got a little thing for this fella? 245 00:12:40,733 --> 00:12:42,769 Jerry, you gotta talk to Sitarides. 246 00:12:42,933 --> 00:12:45,652 Yesterday you told me I had to take my revenge on her. 247 00:12:45,813 --> 00:12:47,371 And that was wrong, Jerry. 248 00:12:48,573 --> 00:12:49,972 You simply must apologize. 249 00:12:50,133 --> 00:12:51,202 - Must I? - Yes. 250 00:12:51,373 --> 00:12:53,967 Because it is the mature, adult thing to do. 251 00:12:54,133 --> 00:12:56,010 How does that affect me? 252 00:12:57,853 --> 00:13:00,651 Elaine. All right, where's the SP 2000? 253 00:13:00,813 --> 00:13:02,769 Because I gotta slice. 254 00:13:03,293 --> 00:13:05,602 I forgot it. I gotta get home. 255 00:13:05,773 --> 00:13:08,162 Oh, okay. Well, I'll go with you. 256 00:13:08,373 --> 00:13:09,965 I'm not really going straight home. 257 00:13:10,133 --> 00:13:12,966 I have to first stop off at the... 258 00:13:13,733 --> 00:13:15,530 ...circus. 259 00:13:15,693 --> 00:13:19,447 You know, with all the clowns. 260 00:13:19,773 --> 00:13:22,333 All right, you have fun. 261 00:13:22,493 --> 00:13:24,165 Oh, no clowns. I don't like clowns. 262 00:13:25,373 --> 00:13:27,284 The clowns. 263 00:13:30,453 --> 00:13:33,047 So again, I'm sorry. I had no right to yell at you. 264 00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:36,330 You're a life- saving doctor and I'm just a comedian. 265 00:13:36,493 --> 00:13:38,961 Jerry, enough. I'll do your friend's cancer screening... 266 00:13:39,133 --> 00:13:42,921 ...because I believe in that, but as far as you and I are concerned, it's off. 267 00:13:43,093 --> 00:13:44,526 Was it Pimple Popper, M. D? 268 00:13:45,093 --> 00:13:46,924 That's the one. 269 00:13:47,813 --> 00:13:49,963 Still got it. 270 00:13:50,413 --> 00:13:53,132 Out, damn heel. 271 00:13:57,013 --> 00:13:58,651 - Elaine? - Kramer? 272 00:13:58,813 --> 00:14:01,168 Yeah, listen, I need my slicer back. 273 00:14:01,853 --> 00:14:03,844 Just hold on. 274 00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:09,052 - Hey, what's going on? - Nothing. 275 00:14:10,213 --> 00:14:11,612 Here. Here you go. 276 00:14:12,573 --> 00:14:15,724 Okay. I'm on the phone, all right? I'm on the phone with someone. 277 00:14:18,733 --> 00:14:21,452 My blade is all dinged up. Oh, come on. 278 00:14:21,613 --> 00:14:23,569 - Elaine. - Phone call. 279 00:14:23,733 --> 00:14:27,442 - I'm on a big phone call. - Oh, come on. This is important. 280 00:14:28,973 --> 00:14:30,964 Hey. Get the hell out of here. 281 00:14:31,133 --> 00:14:33,693 Wow, that's a lot of potatoes. 282 00:14:35,333 --> 00:14:37,369 So George took my slicer down to Kruger... 283 00:14:37,533 --> 00:14:39,649 ...and they're smoothing it out for me. 284 00:14:40,013 --> 00:14:41,332 What the hell is this? 285 00:14:42,053 --> 00:14:45,170 Boy, that looks like an allergic reaction. 286 00:14:45,333 --> 00:14:47,722 Have you been wearing a fake beard? 287 00:14:48,373 --> 00:14:50,409 - No. - Well, what have you been doing? 288 00:14:50,573 --> 00:14:52,325 Nothing. I got up, I ran some errands... 289 00:14:52,493 --> 00:14:53,972 ...went to Sara and apologized... 290 00:14:54,133 --> 00:14:56,693 Whoa, back up. Dr. Sitarides? Yeah, what happened there? 291 00:14:56,853 --> 00:14:59,447 Well, I tried to apologize. It didn't go over too well. 292 00:14:59,613 --> 00:15:00,648 There's your hives. 293 00:15:00,813 --> 00:15:02,644 What? She gave me hives? 294 00:15:02,813 --> 00:15:07,887 Jerry, as the Bible says, "Thou who cureth can maketh ill." 295 00:15:08,613 --> 00:15:10,285 She did kind of touch my face. 296 00:15:10,453 --> 00:15:11,932 Listen to me. Find this woman... 297 00:15:12,093 --> 00:15:14,163 ...tell her you're not a test-tube pincushion. 298 00:15:14,333 --> 00:15:18,292 It does itch. Maybe I will go down to Kruger and talk to her. 299 00:15:18,453 --> 00:15:21,047 All right, great. I gotta go there and pick up my blade. 300 00:15:21,213 --> 00:15:23,522 Oh, hey, and I couldn't find that stockroom. 301 00:15:36,573 --> 00:15:39,007 Oh, that's fantastic. 302 00:15:41,053 --> 00:15:43,408 I just talked to Mr. Kruger. He'll be down in a minute. 303 00:15:43,573 --> 00:15:45,643 He wanted me to take a photograph. 304 00:15:45,813 --> 00:15:49,488 - What record? - His personal file. I don't ask. 305 00:15:50,373 --> 00:15:51,886 Jerry, what brings you here? 306 00:15:52,053 --> 00:15:54,089 I don't know. This? 307 00:15:54,253 --> 00:15:55,572 Looks like hives. 308 00:15:55,773 --> 00:15:57,286 Where do you think that came from? 309 00:15:57,453 --> 00:15:59,762 - What're you doing? - Setting the record straight. 310 00:15:59,933 --> 00:16:01,332 Come on, Sitarides. Cop to it. 311 00:16:01,493 --> 00:16:03,768 What brand of perverted science do you practice? 312 00:16:03,933 --> 00:16:06,925 Are you suggesting I somehow infected you on purpose? 313 00:16:07,093 --> 00:16:08,845 I want the antidote, Pimple Popper. 314 00:16:09,013 --> 00:16:11,811 That's it. I'm out of here. 315 00:16:11,973 --> 00:16:13,645 You're insane. 316 00:16:13,813 --> 00:16:14,882 Am I? 317 00:16:15,053 --> 00:16:17,408 You touched my face. I didn't imagine that. 318 00:16:17,573 --> 00:16:19,768 Dr. Sitarides. Don't go. 319 00:16:19,933 --> 00:16:22,288 Thanks, Jerry. 320 00:16:22,493 --> 00:16:24,290 Hey, George. Hey, doc. 321 00:16:24,453 --> 00:16:26,444 We doing a screening in here? 322 00:16:27,693 --> 00:16:31,163 Yeah, why don't you head on in. We'll be in, in a second. 323 00:16:31,773 --> 00:16:33,525 Be right with you. 324 00:16:34,573 --> 00:16:36,404 - Doc? - Oh, Kramer, this is perfect. 325 00:16:36,573 --> 00:16:39,610 Go in there, pretend you're a doctor and check this guy for moles. 326 00:16:39,773 --> 00:16:41,365 Moles. Yes. 327 00:16:41,533 --> 00:16:44,093 Freckle's ugly cousin. 328 00:16:45,213 --> 00:16:47,602 And just get a picture of him with his shirt off. 329 00:16:48,013 --> 00:16:49,924 You're really cooking up a scheme here. 330 00:16:50,093 --> 00:16:53,130 All right. Come on, let's get in there. Quick, quick, quick. 331 00:16:58,693 --> 00:17:01,924 That is it. I can't take this anymore. 332 00:17:12,413 --> 00:17:14,529 Male mammal. 333 00:17:14,693 --> 00:17:18,811 Approximately 30 to 60 years of age. 334 00:17:18,973 --> 00:17:23,012 Weight, oh, indeterminate. 335 00:17:23,373 --> 00:17:25,170 Okay, Mr. Kruger... 336 00:17:25,333 --> 00:17:27,244 ...we'll take a photo for the records... 337 00:17:27,413 --> 00:17:29,483 ...so if you'll stand up please. 338 00:17:29,653 --> 00:17:31,371 Give me a big smile. 339 00:17:31,813 --> 00:17:34,168 Oh, no, no, no. Not that big. 340 00:17:34,333 --> 00:17:37,211 Yeah, that's nice. Yes. Okay. 341 00:17:37,373 --> 00:17:39,489 Yes, let's have a look-see? 342 00:17:39,653 --> 00:17:41,769 Okay, so... 343 00:17:42,493 --> 00:17:46,327 ...fibre from shirt on left shoulder. 344 00:17:46,613 --> 00:17:48,410 I'll have to keep my eye on that. 345 00:17:49,013 --> 00:17:51,846 How long have you been doing this, Dr. Van Nostrand? 346 00:17:52,013 --> 00:17:54,402 Oh, a long, long time. 347 00:17:54,573 --> 00:17:58,612 Yes, I've seen moles so big they have their own moles. 348 00:17:58,773 --> 00:18:01,412 Freckles that cover two men. 349 00:18:01,733 --> 00:18:05,009 - So how am I looking? - Oh, so far, so good. 350 00:18:13,413 --> 00:18:15,927 - Kramer, I really owe you. - George, we got a problem. 351 00:18:16,293 --> 00:18:18,011 - What? - Well, he's got a mole... 352 00:18:18,173 --> 00:18:20,243 ...on his shoulder, very suspicious. 353 00:18:20,413 --> 00:18:22,927 Tell him you're concerned and he should see someone else. 354 00:18:23,333 --> 00:18:26,803 George, why would I, a Juilliard-trained dermatologist... 355 00:18:26,973 --> 00:18:28,725 ...send him to another doctor? 356 00:18:28,893 --> 00:18:31,123 Because you're not a dermatologist. 357 00:18:31,293 --> 00:18:33,853 No, but he thinks I am and I won't betray that trust. 358 00:18:34,013 --> 00:18:36,607 Now, here's what I wanna do. I think I can get a section... 359 00:18:36,773 --> 00:18:38,604 ...then I'll go down... - Whoa, a section? 360 00:18:38,773 --> 00:18:40,889 If I can grab my slicer and if he holds still. 361 00:18:41,053 --> 00:18:43,647 No. You're not taking a deli slicer to my boss. 362 00:18:43,813 --> 00:18:47,283 - It'll be ultrathin. He'll barely feel it. - No. Absolutely not. 363 00:18:49,293 --> 00:18:52,251 It's my medical opinion that you're making a big mistake... 364 00:18:52,413 --> 00:18:54,802 ...and it's going in my chart. 365 00:18:59,493 --> 00:19:02,883 Yeah, hello, is this Allied Locksmith? 366 00:19:03,053 --> 00:19:06,409 Finally. Okay, I need somebody to come over here right away. 367 00:19:06,573 --> 00:19:09,167 Turn that off. Turn it off! 368 00:19:09,333 --> 00:19:13,645 I am getting a locksmith, all right? Relax! 369 00:19:13,813 --> 00:19:15,565 All right. That's it. 370 00:19:15,733 --> 00:19:19,442 Yeah, the address is 78 West... 371 00:19:19,613 --> 00:19:22,252 - Oh, mama. - Hello? 372 00:19:23,893 --> 00:19:25,121 So Kramer pulled it off? 373 00:19:25,293 --> 00:19:28,842 Yep. And the photo is all fixed and back on his desk, no thanks to you. 374 00:19:29,013 --> 00:19:31,208 That woman had it coming to her. Look at my neck. 375 00:19:31,373 --> 00:19:33,011 I look like I had a beard of bees. 376 00:19:33,173 --> 00:19:35,482 - You should see somebody. - I called everyone. 377 00:19:35,653 --> 00:19:38,963 You know how hard it is to get a dermatologist in this town? 378 00:19:39,133 --> 00:19:42,330 A real dermatologist? 379 00:19:42,493 --> 00:19:44,370 Squamous cell carcinoma. 380 00:19:44,533 --> 00:19:46,888 You're not a doctor. You shouldn't have books like this. 381 00:19:47,053 --> 00:19:49,692 That's what he has, I gotta call. We gotta come clean. 382 00:19:49,853 --> 00:19:52,048 You can't tell him. You'll blow the whole thing. 383 00:19:52,213 --> 00:19:55,967 - I don't want this on my conscience. - I will get him to see a real doctor. 384 00:19:56,133 --> 00:19:58,283 - You just stay away from him. - All right. 385 00:19:58,493 --> 00:20:01,690 Hey, I wonder if they have a picture of my rash in here. 386 00:20:01,893 --> 00:20:06,011 Yeah, they got everything, Jerry. I underlined the best parts. 387 00:20:06,333 --> 00:20:09,052 Hey, this looks like what I have. 388 00:20:09,373 --> 00:20:11,568 Caused by exposure to benzene... 389 00:20:11,733 --> 00:20:14,964 ...a common ingredient in metal cleaners. 390 00:20:15,173 --> 00:20:17,289 Well, that's weird. 391 00:20:18,333 --> 00:20:19,686 What are you doing? 392 00:20:20,413 --> 00:20:21,926 Well, I'm, cleaning my slicer. 393 00:20:22,093 --> 00:20:23,731 That's my hand towel. 394 00:20:23,893 --> 00:20:26,009 I use that on my face, neck and chest. 395 00:20:26,173 --> 00:20:29,131 That's where the hives are coming from. It's not Dr. Sitarides. 396 00:20:29,293 --> 00:20:31,602 It was Dr. Van Nostrand. 397 00:20:31,773 --> 00:20:35,686 So somehow the Bronze- O is reacting to the poison she's giving you. 398 00:20:36,453 --> 00:20:37,806 All right, get out. 399 00:20:38,333 --> 00:20:40,005 And take your Bronze- O with you. 400 00:20:40,173 --> 00:20:43,085 Whoa, that's toxic. 401 00:20:47,933 --> 00:20:49,332 George, come on in. 402 00:20:49,853 --> 00:20:52,367 I'm just going over our annual report. 403 00:20:52,533 --> 00:20:54,649 Boy, did we take it on the chin last year. 404 00:20:56,253 --> 00:20:58,721 Mr. Kruger, I got a message from Dr. Van Nostrand. 405 00:20:58,893 --> 00:21:02,932 He says it might be wise for you to see another doctor about that mole. 406 00:21:03,093 --> 00:21:04,685 I'm not too worried about it. 407 00:21:04,853 --> 00:21:07,765 He said it could be cancerous, you should have it checked out. 408 00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:09,332 George... 409 00:21:09,493 --> 00:21:11,723 ...take a look at this photo. 410 00:21:12,413 --> 00:21:14,483 This was taken 10 years ago. 411 00:21:14,653 --> 00:21:17,645 Now, that mole looks exactly as it does today. 412 00:21:19,773 --> 00:21:22,367 So there's no cause for concern, huh? 413 00:21:23,813 --> 00:21:25,451 Whatever. 414 00:21:25,653 --> 00:21:27,166 And actually... 415 00:21:27,453 --> 00:21:29,489 ...funny thing about this photo. 416 00:21:29,653 --> 00:21:31,245 We were at the beach... 417 00:21:31,413 --> 00:21:33,563 ...and there was this dumb-looking guy nearby. 418 00:21:33,733 --> 00:21:37,487 When he went in for a swim, my sons and I took all his stuff... 419 00:21:37,653 --> 00:21:39,564 ...threw it in the ocean, huh? 420 00:21:39,733 --> 00:21:42,167 What a pear-shaped loser. 421 00:21:43,653 --> 00:21:46,372 Well, that pear-shaped loser was me. 422 00:21:46,533 --> 00:21:48,763 And I was in that photo until I broke in here... 423 00:21:48,933 --> 00:21:52,050 ...stole the photograph and airbrushed myself out of it. 424 00:21:52,213 --> 00:21:53,965 Well, I'll be. 425 00:21:54,133 --> 00:21:56,647 You have lost a lot of hair. 426 00:21:57,533 --> 00:21:59,603 That's what they tell me. 427 00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:08,768 So you want more pastrami? 428 00:22:08,933 --> 00:22:11,447 What was that last thing? That was pretty good. 429 00:22:11,613 --> 00:22:13,171 - Yeah, it was olive loaf. - Oh. 430 00:22:13,333 --> 00:22:14,402 - You want that? - Yeah. 431 00:22:14,613 --> 00:22:17,047 I can't believe Kruger didn't fire you after all that. 432 00:22:17,213 --> 00:22:20,967 He said he didn't care. God, I love that place. 433 00:22:21,133 --> 00:22:22,486 You see another dermatologist? 434 00:22:22,653 --> 00:22:24,564 Yeah, I finally got in to see Dr. Kazarian. 435 00:22:24,733 --> 00:22:25,848 He said it was bad. 436 00:22:26,013 --> 00:22:28,527 - What'd he give you for it? - Aloe. 437 00:22:28,893 --> 00:22:30,485 So where's that locksmith? 438 00:22:30,653 --> 00:22:32,723 Tough to get him out at this hour. 439 00:22:32,893 --> 00:22:36,442 - Can I have a sip? - Oh, yeah, coming up.