1 00:00:04,767 --> 00:00:08,043 When are they gonna learn that news about China is an instant page- turner? 2 00:00:08,207 --> 00:00:09,196 What's that? 3 00:00:09,367 --> 00:00:11,483 It's a Wizard electronic organiser for my dad. 4 00:00:11,647 --> 00:00:13,797 - I'm going to Florida for his birthday. - How much? 5 00:00:13,967 --> 00:00:15,241 Two hundred. I'll tell him 50. 6 00:00:15,407 --> 00:00:18,046 He doesn't care for the gift, he gets excited about the deal. 7 00:00:18,207 --> 00:00:20,198 Where are you getting a Wizard for $50? 8 00:00:20,367 --> 00:00:24,440 I'll tell him I got it on the street and maybe it's hot. That's his favourite. 9 00:00:24,607 --> 00:00:27,724 I got a message from the Rosses at work today. 10 00:00:27,887 --> 00:00:30,037 Susan's parents? When's the last time you talked? 11 00:00:30,527 --> 00:00:32,961 At the funeral, give or take. 12 00:00:33,567 --> 00:00:36,684 Deep down I always kind of felt that they blamed me for Susan's death. 13 00:00:36,847 --> 00:00:39,236 Why? Because you picked out the poison envelopes? 14 00:00:40,727 --> 00:00:42,365 That's silly. 15 00:00:45,207 --> 00:00:49,086 Darryl, these are people I know. 16 00:00:49,247 --> 00:00:51,283 Jerry, George. 17 00:00:51,447 --> 00:00:54,405 Nice meeting you. I gotta run, Elaine. I'll see you later. 18 00:00:54,567 --> 00:00:55,966 Okay. 19 00:00:57,447 --> 00:00:58,436 Still no Puddy? 20 00:00:59,327 --> 00:01:02,046 I think his answering machine's broken, so I just gave up. 21 00:01:03,167 --> 00:01:04,156 What do you think? 22 00:01:04,327 --> 00:01:06,716 What, about you dating a black guy? What's the big deal? 23 00:01:06,887 --> 00:01:10,675 - What black guy? - Darryl. He's black, isn't he? 24 00:01:10,847 --> 00:01:12,678 He is? 25 00:01:12,847 --> 00:01:15,520 - No, he isn't. - Isn't he, Elaine? 26 00:01:15,687 --> 00:01:17,962 - You think? - I thought he looked Irish. 27 00:01:18,807 --> 00:01:20,206 - What's his last name? - Nelson. 28 00:01:20,367 --> 00:01:22,358 - That's not Irish. - I think he's black. 29 00:01:22,527 --> 00:01:23,801 Should we talking about this? 30 00:01:23,967 --> 00:01:25,878 - I think it's okay. - No, it isn't. 31 00:01:26,047 --> 00:01:27,719 - Why not? - Well, it would be okay... 32 00:01:27,887 --> 00:01:29,320 ...if Darryl was here. 33 00:01:29,487 --> 00:01:31,682 - Lf he's black. - Is he black? 34 00:01:31,847 --> 00:01:32,836 Does it matter? 35 00:01:33,007 --> 00:01:35,475 No, of course not. I mean, I'd just like to know. 36 00:01:35,647 --> 00:01:38,207 - So you need to know? - No, I don't need to know. 37 00:01:38,367 --> 00:01:40,881 I just think it would be nice if I knew. 38 00:01:41,047 --> 00:01:42,162 Shall I take that? 39 00:01:42,327 --> 00:01:43,555 - One sec. - Oh, here. 40 00:01:43,727 --> 00:01:44,921 Oh, yeah, hang on. 41 00:01:54,327 --> 00:01:57,478 - Mrs. Ross, it's George. - Who? 42 00:01:58,167 --> 00:02:01,398 George Costanza. Susan's friend? 43 00:02:03,487 --> 00:02:05,523 Long time no speak. 44 00:02:05,687 --> 00:02:07,643 We're all out of lime juice. 45 00:02:07,807 --> 00:02:09,684 I told that woman to buy more. 46 00:02:10,327 --> 00:02:12,443 George, the Susan Ross Foundation... 47 00:02:12,607 --> 00:02:14,438 ...is having an event this weekend. 48 00:02:14,607 --> 00:02:19,556 Oh, I just leased a house out in the Hamptons... 49 00:02:19,727 --> 00:02:22,685 ...and I have got to get out there this weekend and sign the papers. 50 00:02:22,847 --> 00:02:24,439 I'm going back to bed. 51 00:02:25,047 --> 00:02:27,641 - Thank you for calling, George. - Oh, sure. 52 00:02:27,807 --> 00:02:30,037 I mean, after all, you were almost my... 53 00:02:30,207 --> 00:02:32,562 Okay, I gotta go. 54 00:02:34,207 --> 00:02:35,765 House in the Hamptons? 55 00:02:35,927 --> 00:02:37,724 I've been lying about my income for years. 56 00:02:37,887 --> 00:02:40,640 I figured I could afford a fake house in the Hamptons. 57 00:02:41,367 --> 00:02:42,561 - Well. - Hey. 58 00:02:42,727 --> 00:02:45,639 Well, grab a cigar, boys. 59 00:02:45,807 --> 00:02:47,240 Yeah, it's time to celebrate. 60 00:02:47,407 --> 00:02:50,126 - What are we celebrating? - You remember my coffee- table book? 61 00:02:50,287 --> 00:02:51,640 With the little legs. 62 00:02:51,807 --> 00:02:53,445 That's the one. 63 00:02:54,247 --> 00:02:58,604 A big Hollywood so-and-so optioned it for a movie. 64 00:03:01,207 --> 00:03:04,199 How are they gonna make that book into a movie? 65 00:03:04,367 --> 00:03:06,835 Remember that photo book on toy ray guns? 66 00:03:07,007 --> 00:03:09,999 - Yeah. - Independence Day? 67 00:03:11,247 --> 00:03:12,566 How much are they paying you? 68 00:03:12,727 --> 00:03:15,480 Let's just say I don't have to worry about working for a while. 69 00:03:15,647 --> 00:03:18,036 A long while. 70 00:03:18,807 --> 00:03:21,401 That's funny, because I haven't seen you working... 71 00:03:21,567 --> 00:03:25,480 ...for a while. A long while. 72 00:03:25,647 --> 00:03:27,877 And you're not going to, because I'm hanging it up. 73 00:03:28,047 --> 00:03:31,244 Boys, I'm retiring. 74 00:03:31,407 --> 00:03:32,635 From what? 75 00:03:32,847 --> 00:03:35,315 From the grind. I mean, who needs it? 76 00:03:35,487 --> 00:03:38,001 You know, I've accomplished everything I've set out to do. 77 00:03:39,047 --> 00:03:40,036 What's that? 78 00:03:40,207 --> 00:03:43,040 Oh, bought myself a little retirement gift. 79 00:03:43,207 --> 00:03:45,323 A gold watch. 80 00:03:46,207 --> 00:03:48,402 It's not really gold. 81 00:04:00,567 --> 00:04:02,842 - Hey. - Hey, great music. 82 00:04:03,007 --> 00:04:04,486 Oh, it's my neighbour. 83 00:04:04,647 --> 00:04:06,922 They blast that stuff 24 hours a day. I hate it. 84 00:04:08,127 --> 00:04:09,719 Turn it down! 85 00:04:13,767 --> 00:04:15,883 These are nice. 86 00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:18,641 Do they have any cultural significance? 87 00:04:18,807 --> 00:04:20,877 They're African. 88 00:04:21,847 --> 00:04:23,326 Right. 89 00:04:23,967 --> 00:04:26,242 - African. - Well, not "Africa." 90 00:04:26,407 --> 00:04:27,806 Actually South Africa. 91 00:04:27,967 --> 00:04:30,197 South Africa. 92 00:04:30,367 --> 00:04:34,838 My family used to live there. We got out years ago. For obvious reasons. 93 00:04:35,007 --> 00:04:38,682 - You know how it is. - Maybe. 94 00:04:39,087 --> 00:04:41,555 You must hate hot dogs, huh? 95 00:04:42,807 --> 00:04:46,516 Or else you really like them and that's why you do this. 96 00:04:48,127 --> 00:04:52,518 If I had one of these things I'd be eating hot dogs all the time. 97 00:04:52,687 --> 00:04:54,439 You gonna buy a hot dog or not? 98 00:04:54,967 --> 00:04:56,400 No. 99 00:05:03,207 --> 00:05:05,402 Rise and shine, sleepyhead. 100 00:05:07,087 --> 00:05:09,237 It's 5:30 in the morning. 101 00:05:10,047 --> 00:05:11,958 We let you sleep in. 102 00:05:12,927 --> 00:05:16,966 Well, as long as I'm up, Dad, I got you a birthday present. 103 00:05:17,127 --> 00:05:18,685 Here. Happy birthday. 104 00:05:18,847 --> 00:05:21,486 Oh, Jerry. I should be buying you presents. 105 00:05:22,367 --> 00:05:23,959 What does that mean? 106 00:05:24,127 --> 00:05:26,118 Leave your father alone. It's his birthday. 107 00:05:28,287 --> 00:05:30,847 It's a radar detector. 108 00:05:31,327 --> 00:05:35,639 Radar detector. I've never seen you go over 20 miles an hour. 109 00:05:35,927 --> 00:05:39,363 You're like the grand marshal of the Rose Bowl parade. 110 00:05:39,967 --> 00:05:42,083 It's a Wizard organiser. 111 00:05:42,247 --> 00:05:43,566 This looks like too much money. 112 00:05:43,727 --> 00:05:46,366 No, I got it from a guy on the street. It was like 50 bucks. 113 00:05:46,527 --> 00:05:48,199 - You think it's hot? - Could be. 114 00:05:48,367 --> 00:05:52,599 Attaboy. Helen, Jerry got me a hot Wizard computer. 115 00:05:52,767 --> 00:05:54,803 I'm right here. 116 00:05:55,407 --> 00:05:58,763 You can do everything with it. You can get e- mail, fax, there's a calculator. 117 00:05:58,927 --> 00:06:00,997 So I can use it to figure out the tip? 118 00:06:01,167 --> 00:06:04,159 Yeah, I guess. But the really cool thing is the daily planner. 119 00:06:04,327 --> 00:06:06,522 We can go to restaurants and figure out the tips. 120 00:06:06,687 --> 00:06:08,996 Jerry, you're getting your father too excited. 121 00:06:11,767 --> 00:06:14,679 Hey, buddy. When did you get in? 122 00:06:16,087 --> 00:06:17,884 Kramer, what are you doing here? 123 00:06:18,047 --> 00:06:20,845 I told you I was retiring. I moved in next door. 124 00:06:22,647 --> 00:06:25,400 Mr. Cornstein died, and it's a beautiful apartment. 125 00:06:25,567 --> 00:06:28,843 Yeah, your folks said it was for rent, so I jumped on it. 126 00:06:30,527 --> 00:06:32,165 Kramer, you can't live down here. 127 00:06:32,327 --> 00:06:35,125 This is where people come to die. 128 00:06:37,127 --> 00:06:38,606 Not you. 129 00:06:38,767 --> 00:06:40,280 Older people. 130 00:06:40,447 --> 00:06:43,166 Don't eat cookies for breakfast. 131 00:06:43,327 --> 00:06:46,922 I'll fix you something. How about a feta-cheese omelette? 132 00:06:47,087 --> 00:06:48,566 That sounds great, Mom. 133 00:06:48,727 --> 00:06:50,604 You feed him, he'll never leave. 134 00:06:50,767 --> 00:06:54,442 I don't have any feta. How about cottage cheese and Egg Beaters? 135 00:06:55,087 --> 00:06:57,078 I guess. 136 00:06:57,247 --> 00:06:59,363 - I don't believe this. - I know, I know. 137 00:06:59,527 --> 00:07:01,085 Don't I look more relaxed? 138 00:07:32,687 --> 00:07:36,362 So, George, do you have any thoughts on this Darryl situation? 139 00:07:36,527 --> 00:07:37,880 Actually, I did have a thought. 140 00:07:39,807 --> 00:07:41,877 Why don't you just ask him? 141 00:07:43,007 --> 00:07:48,001 Because if I ask him, then it's like I really want to know. 142 00:07:49,967 --> 00:07:52,197 Maybe he's... 143 00:07:52,727 --> 00:07:54,604 ...mixed. 144 00:07:55,447 --> 00:07:56,721 Is that the right word? 145 00:07:56,887 --> 00:07:59,321 I don't think we're supposed to be talking about this. 146 00:07:59,487 --> 00:08:02,285 - I'm just gonna go to the bathroom. - You know what? I'm leaving. 147 00:08:02,447 --> 00:08:05,086 - I'll talk to Jerry when he gets back. - All right. 148 00:08:06,407 --> 00:08:09,479 Oh, Mrs. Ross. Mr. Ross. 149 00:08:09,687 --> 00:08:12,042 Oh, you're George's friend. 150 00:08:12,207 --> 00:08:14,357 We saw him in the city this weekend. 151 00:08:14,527 --> 00:08:17,485 What happened to his place in the Hamptons? 152 00:08:17,647 --> 00:08:22,482 The Hamptons? George Costanza? 153 00:08:26,687 --> 00:08:28,757 I don't think so. 154 00:08:29,687 --> 00:08:31,325 Have a good one. 155 00:08:35,887 --> 00:08:37,366 Rosses. 156 00:08:37,527 --> 00:08:40,599 George. We were just talking about you. 157 00:08:41,727 --> 00:08:43,843 Well, sorry I missed that charity thing... 158 00:08:44,007 --> 00:08:46,805 ...but this was one of those truly glorious Hampton weekends... 159 00:08:46,967 --> 00:08:49,640 ...that you always hear about. - Really? 160 00:08:49,807 --> 00:08:51,399 Yeah, I may move out there. 161 00:08:52,927 --> 00:08:54,963 I mean it. I'll do it. 162 00:08:57,087 --> 00:08:58,918 Okay, I'll see you later. 163 00:08:59,327 --> 00:09:00,840 Keep it real. 164 00:09:03,807 --> 00:09:07,766 Another fine meal. And now for my Wizard tip calculator. 165 00:09:07,927 --> 00:09:10,122 Dad, it's got lots of other functions. 166 00:09:10,287 --> 00:09:12,801 Don't worry. I'll get to the other functions. 167 00:09:12,967 --> 00:09:14,002 I can't get it open. 168 00:09:17,207 --> 00:09:18,799 Jerry got it open. 169 00:09:21,767 --> 00:09:25,157 The service was slow, and God forbid they should refill the water. 170 00:09:25,327 --> 00:09:28,717 How does 12.4 percent sound? 171 00:09:29,487 --> 00:09:34,686 Well, your tip is $4 and 36.6666 cents. 172 00:09:34,847 --> 00:09:36,439 We'll round down. 173 00:09:37,527 --> 00:09:40,837 Jerry, it was so nice of you to come down here on your father's birthday. 174 00:09:41,007 --> 00:09:43,237 You've helped take his mind off the condo election. 175 00:09:43,407 --> 00:09:46,001 Right. You can't run for condo president because you were... 176 00:09:46,167 --> 00:09:48,681 ...impeached at the other condo. - I was never impeached. 177 00:09:48,847 --> 00:09:50,565 I resigned. 178 00:09:50,727 --> 00:09:53,082 Even so, the press would bury him. 179 00:09:53,247 --> 00:09:55,238 What press? 180 00:09:55,927 --> 00:09:58,600 The condo newsletter. The Boca Breeze. 181 00:09:58,767 --> 00:10:01,235 Pinko commie rag. 182 00:10:03,407 --> 00:10:05,967 Hey, Morty. Your boy here. 183 00:10:06,127 --> 00:10:09,005 He just got a date with that young aquacise instructor. 184 00:10:09,167 --> 00:10:10,964 She's 50. 185 00:10:11,127 --> 00:10:14,836 You know what he's got? He's got charisma. 186 00:10:15,007 --> 00:10:16,520 - That's my man. - I'll see you guys. 187 00:10:16,687 --> 00:10:17,881 Yeah. 188 00:10:20,127 --> 00:10:21,162 Yeah. 189 00:10:23,607 --> 00:10:26,440 Morty, what are you looking at? 190 00:10:26,687 --> 00:10:28,279 I'll tell you what I'm looking at. 191 00:10:28,447 --> 00:10:33,999 The next condo-board president of Del Boca Vista, phase three. 192 00:10:38,447 --> 00:10:41,245 Elaine, thank you for the Wizard. 193 00:10:41,687 --> 00:10:43,962 Wow, it's got so many functions. 194 00:10:44,127 --> 00:10:45,799 Yeah, yeah, forget about all that. 195 00:10:45,967 --> 00:10:49,676 First thing is first, warranty information. 196 00:10:49,847 --> 00:10:52,725 Name. We know that. Hobbies. 197 00:10:52,887 --> 00:10:55,117 - Skiing, racquetball... - Well, I don't do that stuff. 198 00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:57,721 It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. 199 00:10:57,887 --> 00:11:00,401 Oh, Here's one. Race. 200 00:11:01,087 --> 00:11:02,202 Isn't that optional? 201 00:11:02,367 --> 00:11:07,122 It certainly should be. It's nobody's damn business. 202 00:11:07,647 --> 00:11:09,478 But they really would like to know. 203 00:11:10,847 --> 00:11:13,645 - All right. I'm Asian. - What? 204 00:11:13,807 --> 00:11:15,001 Just to mess with them. 205 00:11:16,327 --> 00:11:18,761 Right. Good one. 206 00:11:18,927 --> 00:11:22,317 Average income. Over a hundred thousand. 207 00:11:23,567 --> 00:11:25,239 - Really? - So does that matter? 208 00:11:25,807 --> 00:11:30,358 No. But it's very nice to know. 209 00:11:34,207 --> 00:11:37,119 So did you figure out Darryl's... 210 00:11:37,887 --> 00:11:39,286 ...you know? 211 00:11:39,487 --> 00:11:43,400 I've given up. So now we're going to a bunch of Spanish restaurants. 212 00:11:43,567 --> 00:11:45,319 Figure that'll cover us either way. 213 00:11:46,847 --> 00:11:49,077 You're a master of race relations. 214 00:11:49,247 --> 00:11:52,364 So Kramer's running for president of the condo? 215 00:11:53,087 --> 00:11:55,920 Yeah. It's all my father's doing. 216 00:11:56,727 --> 00:11:58,797 He wants to instal Kramer in a puppet regime... 217 00:11:58,967 --> 00:12:01,162 ...and then wield power from behind the scenes. 218 00:12:01,327 --> 00:12:03,966 Preferably from the sauna in the clubhouse. 219 00:12:04,727 --> 00:12:06,763 - Who are they running against? - Common sense... 220 00:12:06,927 --> 00:12:08,838 ...and a guy in a wheelchair. 221 00:12:10,087 --> 00:12:12,078 - Jerry? - He's still down with his folks. 222 00:12:12,247 --> 00:12:13,475 What are you doing here? 223 00:12:13,647 --> 00:12:15,444 - Elaine. Elaine. - I'm getting his mail. 224 00:12:15,607 --> 00:12:18,201 - Oh, no. - He asked you to get the mail? 225 00:12:19,607 --> 00:12:21,404 Jerry, why is Elaine getting your mail? 226 00:12:21,567 --> 00:12:25,401 George, listen to me. I have a very important job for you. 227 00:12:26,967 --> 00:12:28,605 I want you to come by twice a day... 228 00:12:28,767 --> 00:12:31,645 ...and flush the toilet so the gaskets don't dry out and leak. 229 00:12:33,647 --> 00:12:36,525 - What? - Well, what about the mail? 230 00:12:36,687 --> 00:12:38,166 This is far more important. 231 00:12:38,327 --> 00:12:41,524 You must exercise the gaskets, George. 232 00:12:42,927 --> 00:12:45,760 All right, Jerry, I'll do it. See you. 233 00:12:47,927 --> 00:12:50,521 So, ran into the Rosses again. 234 00:12:50,687 --> 00:12:52,439 Oh, right, at the coffee shop. 235 00:12:52,607 --> 00:12:55,804 Where did they get the idea that you have a place in the Hamptons? 236 00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:01,364 - From me. - What did you say? 237 00:13:01,527 --> 00:13:04,280 I told them I have a place in the Hamptons. 238 00:13:04,927 --> 00:13:05,962 What did you say? 239 00:13:06,127 --> 00:13:07,560 I told them you didn't. 240 00:13:09,047 --> 00:13:13,006 And I laughed and I laughed. 241 00:13:14,087 --> 00:13:15,964 So they know. 242 00:13:16,127 --> 00:13:18,687 - Those liars. - But you lied first. 243 00:13:18,847 --> 00:13:21,077 But they let me go on and on all about the Hamptons. 244 00:13:21,247 --> 00:13:22,282 They never said a thing. 245 00:13:22,447 --> 00:13:24,278 You don't let somebody lie when you know. 246 00:13:24,447 --> 00:13:26,597 - You call them a liar. - Like you're a liar. 247 00:13:26,767 --> 00:13:28,598 Yes. Thank you. Was that so hard? 248 00:13:28,767 --> 00:13:32,919 So this is over? Not over? I'm betting not over. 249 00:13:33,407 --> 00:13:35,079 Not by a long shot. 250 00:13:35,247 --> 00:13:37,078 I'm calling the Rosses and inviting them... 251 00:13:37,247 --> 00:13:39,078 ...to my nonexistent place in the Hamptons. 252 00:13:39,247 --> 00:13:41,522 Then we'll see who blinks first. 253 00:13:42,047 --> 00:13:44,607 Haven't you done enough to these people? 254 00:13:45,847 --> 00:13:50,079 This is not about them. Now, if you'll excuse me... 255 00:13:50,247 --> 00:13:53,364 ...I have to exercise Jerry's gaskets. 256 00:13:57,047 --> 00:13:58,639 Vote for Kramer. Cosmo Kramer. 257 00:13:58,807 --> 00:14:01,037 I'm running for condo president. Like your vote. 258 00:14:01,207 --> 00:14:02,640 Thanks. 259 00:14:03,167 --> 00:14:06,682 Remember, ma'am, a vote for me is a vote for Kramer. 260 00:14:07,287 --> 00:14:09,960 - Can you cut my meat? - Gladly. 261 00:14:37,087 --> 00:14:38,679 - Coffee? - Sure. 262 00:14:38,847 --> 00:14:39,882 Are you black? 263 00:14:41,887 --> 00:14:43,605 Or should I bring some cream? 264 00:14:43,767 --> 00:14:46,600 I'm black. Oh, you know what? Bring a little cream. 265 00:14:49,207 --> 00:14:51,163 - Look at that. - Did you hear that? 266 00:14:51,327 --> 00:14:52,999 - What? - God, there are still people... 267 00:14:53,167 --> 00:14:55,806 ...who have trouble with an interracial couple. 268 00:14:55,967 --> 00:14:57,525 Interracial? Us? 269 00:14:58,727 --> 00:15:00,126 Isn't that unbelievable? 270 00:15:00,287 --> 00:15:03,484 Yes. It's awful. 271 00:15:03,647 --> 00:15:07,481 They're upset because we're an interracial couple. 272 00:15:07,647 --> 00:15:09,160 That is racism. 273 00:15:10,207 --> 00:15:12,038 - I don't feel like eating. - Me neither. 274 00:15:12,207 --> 00:15:14,721 Well, maybe this turkey club. 275 00:15:16,127 --> 00:15:18,687 So here I am. 276 00:15:18,847 --> 00:15:21,486 Ready to take you to the Hamptons. 277 00:15:21,647 --> 00:15:23,558 Sounds grand. 278 00:15:23,727 --> 00:15:26,321 - Do you have your bathing suits? - It's March. 279 00:15:28,927 --> 00:15:32,761 Speak now or we are headed to the Hamptons. 280 00:15:34,127 --> 00:15:35,799 It's a two-hour drive. 281 00:15:35,967 --> 00:15:40,563 Once you get in that car we are going all the way... 282 00:15:41,087 --> 00:15:42,839 ...to the Hamptons. 283 00:15:46,527 --> 00:15:48,518 All right, you wanna get nuts... 284 00:15:48,687 --> 00:15:52,362 ...come on, let's get nuts! 285 00:15:55,567 --> 00:15:57,797 Dad, you know, you can programme this thing to beep... 286 00:15:57,967 --> 00:15:59,480 ... every time you need a vitamin. 287 00:16:01,807 --> 00:16:03,445 Dad, you look so different. 288 00:16:05,367 --> 00:16:07,005 We're campaigning, Jerry. 289 00:16:07,167 --> 00:16:09,886 To rule the people, one must walk among them. 290 00:16:10,047 --> 00:16:12,322 This is the homestretch. Tomorrow's the election. 291 00:16:12,487 --> 00:16:15,001 Right, yeah. The poll's close after dinner. Three o'clock. 292 00:16:15,167 --> 00:16:16,600 But then when we win... 293 00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:21,443 ...the celebration goes all night until the break of 8 p.m. 294 00:16:21,887 --> 00:16:24,606 You could put that whole schedule right in your daily planner. 295 00:16:24,767 --> 00:16:28,282 - Daily what? - Have you read today's Boca Breeze? 296 00:16:28,607 --> 00:16:30,677 Hey, look at that. Picture of me, huh? 297 00:16:30,847 --> 00:16:35,921 Yeah, " Candidate Cosmo Kramer, caught barefoot in clubhouse." 298 00:16:37,047 --> 00:16:38,639 Barefoot in the clubhouse? Kramer... 299 00:16:38,807 --> 00:16:40,843 ...don't you realise this is against the rules? 300 00:16:41,007 --> 00:16:43,805 Well, I couldn't find my shoes. 301 00:16:43,967 --> 00:16:47,243 These people work and wait their whole lives to move down here... 302 00:16:47,407 --> 00:16:51,525 ...sit in the heat, pretend it's not hot, and enforce these rules. 303 00:16:51,687 --> 00:16:53,484 - Who wants hot chocolate? - Oh, yeah. 304 00:16:54,207 --> 00:16:57,483 This is a huge scandal. We need damage control. 305 00:16:57,647 --> 00:17:00,207 All right, look, people seem to like those tip calculators. 306 00:17:00,367 --> 00:17:02,164 - Wizards. - How about if we give one out... 307 00:17:02,327 --> 00:17:04,522 ...to every member on the condo board? 308 00:17:04,687 --> 00:17:06,040 Kramer. 309 00:17:06,207 --> 00:17:07,765 There are 20 people on the board. 310 00:17:07,927 --> 00:17:10,043 Thank God you can get that deal. 311 00:17:10,647 --> 00:17:12,683 Payoffs. Now we're playing politics. 312 00:17:12,847 --> 00:17:16,078 All right, what do we do next, Morty, huh? Wiretaps? Slush funds? 313 00:17:16,247 --> 00:17:17,316 First I need a nap. 314 00:17:18,327 --> 00:17:20,761 I'll get your electric blanket. 315 00:17:22,607 --> 00:17:24,598 Kramer, I can't get that many Wizards. 316 00:17:24,767 --> 00:17:26,803 - What about your deal? - I didn't have a deal. 317 00:17:26,967 --> 00:17:28,685 They're $200 a pop. What do I do? 318 00:17:28,847 --> 00:17:30,121 Don't worry. I know a guy. 319 00:17:30,287 --> 00:17:32,755 - Down here? - Yeah. Bob Saccamano's father. 320 00:17:34,807 --> 00:17:37,844 And that leads into the master bedroom. 321 00:17:38,007 --> 00:17:39,406 Tell us more. 322 00:17:39,567 --> 00:17:41,398 Wanna hear more? 323 00:17:42,287 --> 00:17:44,596 The master bedroom opens into the solarium. 324 00:17:44,767 --> 00:17:47,361 - Another solarium? - Yes, two solariums. 325 00:17:47,527 --> 00:17:49,085 Quite a find. 326 00:17:49,967 --> 00:17:53,084 - And I have horses too. - What are their names? 327 00:17:56,767 --> 00:17:59,076 Snoopy and Prickly Pete. 328 00:18:01,327 --> 00:18:02,726 Should I keep driving? 329 00:18:02,927 --> 00:18:05,077 Oh, look, an antique stand. 330 00:18:05,247 --> 00:18:08,000 Pull over. We'll buy you a housewarming gift. 331 00:18:09,407 --> 00:18:11,443 A housewarming gift. 332 00:18:11,807 --> 00:18:14,446 All right, we're taking it up a notch. 333 00:18:18,047 --> 00:18:20,607 - Long day? - Yeah, I just worked a triple shift. 334 00:18:20,767 --> 00:18:22,359 I hear you, sister. 335 00:18:23,047 --> 00:18:24,275 - Sister? - Yeah. 336 00:18:24,447 --> 00:18:27,120 It's okay. My boyfriend's black. Here he is. See? 337 00:18:27,287 --> 00:18:29,118 - Hi, Elaine. - Hey. 338 00:18:29,287 --> 00:18:31,164 - He's black? - Yeah. 339 00:18:32,607 --> 00:18:34,996 - I'm black? - Aren't you? 340 00:18:35,167 --> 00:18:37,806 I'll give you a couple of minutes to decide. 341 00:18:39,487 --> 00:18:41,398 - What are you talking about? - You're black. 342 00:18:41,567 --> 00:18:43,239 You said we were an interracial couple. 343 00:18:43,407 --> 00:18:45,637 We are because you're Hispanic. 344 00:18:49,487 --> 00:18:51,398 - I am? - Aren't you? 345 00:18:51,567 --> 00:18:53,319 No. Why would you think that? 346 00:18:53,487 --> 00:18:55,682 Your name's Benes. Your hair. 347 00:18:55,847 --> 00:18:58,042 You kept taking me to those Spanish restaurants. 348 00:18:58,767 --> 00:19:00,598 That's because I thought you were black. 349 00:19:02,127 --> 00:19:05,039 Why would you take me to a Spanish restaurant because I'm black? 350 00:19:05,527 --> 00:19:08,087 I don't think we should be talking about this. 351 00:19:08,247 --> 00:19:10,283 - So, what are you? - I'm white. 352 00:19:10,447 --> 00:19:13,883 So we're just a couple of white people? 353 00:19:15,167 --> 00:19:16,680 I guess. 354 00:19:18,687 --> 00:19:20,245 Yeah. 355 00:19:21,447 --> 00:19:23,324 - So do you want to go to the Gap? - Sure. 356 00:19:28,127 --> 00:19:31,164 Well, I handed out all the Wizards. 357 00:19:31,327 --> 00:19:33,397 The polls close in one hour. 358 00:19:33,567 --> 00:19:36,957 I think we've got this baby all sewn up, huh? Yeah. 359 00:19:38,207 --> 00:19:41,005 Yeah, there was an extra one. Norman Bergerman. 360 00:19:41,167 --> 00:19:43,965 He won't be leaving any tips where he is. 361 00:19:44,127 --> 00:19:45,640 Congratulations, Mr. President. 362 00:19:45,807 --> 00:19:48,640 Congratulations, Mr. Puppet- Master, huh? 363 00:19:48,807 --> 00:19:51,924 Hey, Morty, what's wrong with these tip calculators? 364 00:19:52,087 --> 00:19:53,315 What are you talking about? 365 00:19:53,487 --> 00:19:56,604 It's overtipping. I just left 5 bucks for a BLT. 366 00:19:56,767 --> 00:19:58,758 Let me see that. 367 00:19:58,967 --> 00:20:01,037 This isn't a Wizard. It's a Willard. 368 00:20:01,687 --> 00:20:05,043 It's a Willard? Saccamano Sr. Screwed me. 369 00:20:05,207 --> 00:20:06,686 Mine doesn't have a seven. 370 00:20:06,847 --> 00:20:07,962 I'm ruined. 371 00:20:08,127 --> 00:20:10,163 Jerry, why didn't you get them Wizards? 372 00:20:10,327 --> 00:20:12,045 Because the real Wizard's $200. 373 00:20:12,207 --> 00:20:15,165 - You didn't have a deal? - No deal. Not hot. 374 00:20:15,327 --> 00:20:18,683 Morty, you and Kramer. You're finished. 375 00:20:18,847 --> 00:20:21,566 Everyone vote for the guy in the wheelchair. 376 00:20:21,727 --> 00:20:24,480 - Let's go. - The people have spoken. 377 00:20:25,407 --> 00:20:27,967 Well, that's it for me. I'm heading back to New York. 378 00:20:31,207 --> 00:20:32,401 Dad, I'm sorry. 379 00:20:32,567 --> 00:20:33,556 You should be. 380 00:20:33,727 --> 00:20:37,197 How could you spend $200 on a tip calculator? 381 00:20:37,367 --> 00:20:40,279 It does other things! 382 00:20:52,247 --> 00:20:55,603 - Where are we, George? - Almost there. 383 00:20:56,447 --> 00:20:58,199 This is the end of Long Island. 384 00:20:58,967 --> 00:21:00,400 Where's your house? 385 00:21:00,567 --> 00:21:03,604 We go on foot from here. 386 00:21:03,807 --> 00:21:05,399 All right. 387 00:21:16,047 --> 00:21:19,517 There's no house! It's a lie! 388 00:21:19,687 --> 00:21:22,406 There's no solarium. There's no Prickly Pete. 389 00:21:22,567 --> 00:21:24,444 There's no other solarium. 390 00:21:24,607 --> 00:21:25,881 We know. 391 00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:33,407 Then why? Why did you make me drive all the way out here? 392 00:21:33,567 --> 00:21:38,800 Why didn't you say something? Why? Why? Why? 393 00:21:38,967 --> 00:21:41,879 We don't like you, George. 394 00:21:43,127 --> 00:21:46,676 And we always blamed you for what happened to Susan. 395 00:21:51,327 --> 00:21:52,680 All right. 396 00:21:52,927 --> 00:21:54,883 Let's head back.