1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,000 - ♪ Look up there ♪ - ♪ What do you see? ♪ 2 00:00:04,196 --> 00:00:05,890 ♪ Nature and stuff ♪ 3 00:00:05,914 --> 00:00:07,175 - ♪ Like a rock ♪ - ♪ And a tree ♪ 4 00:00:07,199 --> 00:00:09,842 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 5 00:00:10,035 --> 00:00:13,420 ♪ Way up here, you can breathe the air ♪ 6 00:00:13,556 --> 00:00:14,662 ♪ Catch some fish ♪ 7 00:00:14,724 --> 00:00:16,240 ♪ Or gaze at a bear ♪ 8 00:00:16,300 --> 00:00:17,499 ♪ Wow ♪ 9 00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:21,072 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 10 00:00:21,096 --> 00:00:22,262 ♪ Here we live, oh, oh ♪ 11 00:00:22,414 --> 00:00:23,930 ♪ Here we'll stay, oh, whoo ♪ 12 00:00:24,025 --> 00:00:25,577 ♪ From longest night to longest day ♪ 13 00:00:25,601 --> 00:00:29,278 ♪ In the Great North. ♪ 14 00:00:34,093 --> 00:00:35,462 JUDY: Good morning, family. 15 00:00:35,486 --> 00:00:38,186 Or should I say, great morning, 16 00:00:38,289 --> 00:00:40,058 because... (imitates fanfare) 17 00:00:40,082 --> 00:00:42,766 $56 worth of art supplies was recently donated to school, 18 00:00:42,826 --> 00:00:45,544 and I'm gonna ask Principal Gibbons to let me put together 19 00:00:45,695 --> 00:00:47,640 a group to paint a new mural over the old one 20 00:00:47,664 --> 00:00:49,864 - in the east hallway. - Oh, you mean the old mural 21 00:00:49,942 --> 00:00:52,102 of the whales with eyes that seem to follow you 22 00:00:52,244 --> 00:00:53,922 - wherever you go? - That's the one: 23 00:00:53,946 --> 00:00:55,106 Whales Watching. 24 00:00:55,130 --> 00:00:56,591 Ugh, it always gave me the creeps. 25 00:00:56,615 --> 00:00:58,093 Kept me out of trouble, though... Kind of hard 26 00:00:58,117 --> 00:00:59,745 to break the rules with those guys looking at you. 27 00:00:59,769 --> 00:01:01,780 It's practically screaming at me to paint over it. 28 00:01:01,804 --> 00:01:03,749 And, of course, I'll have my volunteers. 29 00:01:03,773 --> 00:01:05,751 But since it's my idea, it'll be my vision. 30 00:01:05,775 --> 00:01:07,753 Like how Jackson Pollock would sometimes have a friend 31 00:01:07,777 --> 00:01:10,017 throw some paint at a canvas while he took a nap, 32 00:01:10,053 --> 00:01:11,214 but it was still his painting. 33 00:01:11,238 --> 00:01:12,698 What are you gonna do for the mural? 34 00:01:12,722 --> 00:01:14,609 One idea is an abstract cubist rendering 35 00:01:14,633 --> 00:01:16,127 of the various emotions you feel 36 00:01:16,151 --> 00:01:17,837 when you stay home from school sick, and calling it: 37 00:01:17,861 --> 00:01:20,079 (chuckles): Cube for the Common Cold. 38 00:01:20,272 --> 00:01:21,972 Or Fingers Around the World, 39 00:01:22,032 --> 00:01:24,043 a mural of all the different fingers and finger styles 40 00:01:24,067 --> 00:01:25,729 - across the world. - Do both. 41 00:01:25,753 --> 00:01:27,898 Like when I can't decide between a bath or a shower, 42 00:01:27,922 --> 00:01:29,088 I call it a "shath." 43 00:01:29,281 --> 00:01:31,068 This will be the world's first chance 44 00:01:31,092 --> 00:01:32,424 to meet Judy Tobin, the artist. 45 00:01:32,617 --> 00:01:34,395 And it'll surely be the first stop 46 00:01:34,419 --> 00:01:37,321 on the eventual Historic Judy Tobin Art Tour. 47 00:01:37,381 --> 00:01:38,909 I'd buy a ticket right now if I could. 48 00:01:38,933 --> 00:01:41,767 As well as some "merc" from the mercantile stand. 49 00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:44,828 Whew! I am stewing in creative juices, 50 00:01:44,888 --> 00:01:47,681 -and I need to go put on deodorant. -Dad, 51 00:01:47,833 --> 00:01:49,402 did you read the Lone Moose Mischief Report today? 52 00:01:49,426 --> 00:01:50,979 - The what? - Lone Moose Mischief. 53 00:01:51,003 --> 00:01:52,572 It's the section of the newspaper that reports 54 00:01:52,596 --> 00:01:54,649 all the crimes that have happened in town the past week. 55 00:01:54,673 --> 00:01:57,094 - It names names and everything. - That could cause a lot of trouble. 56 00:01:57,118 --> 00:01:59,838 It doesn't. No one reads it but these two knuckleheads. 57 00:01:59,862 --> 00:02:02,788 The people of Lone Moose respect each other's privacy. 58 00:02:02,957 --> 00:02:06,016 If someone wants to commit a crime, that's their business. 59 00:02:06,076 --> 00:02:08,096 It's interesting you would say that, Father, 60 00:02:08,120 --> 00:02:09,853 considering what I just read. 61 00:02:09,955 --> 00:02:12,517 Ahem. "This weekend, someone knocked down 62 00:02:12,541 --> 00:02:15,801 "Vera Warren's British chimney sweep garden gnome. 63 00:02:15,952 --> 00:02:18,195 A single boot was left on her lawn." 64 00:02:18,255 --> 00:02:20,881 Oh, that's one of the most famous garden gnomes in town. 65 00:02:21,033 --> 00:02:23,458 When you press a button on it, it says, "'Ello, gardener." 66 00:02:23,519 --> 00:02:25,627 "Vera believes the boot belongs to... 67 00:02:25,688 --> 00:02:27,607 -Beef Tobin." -Whoa! -(gasps) 68 00:02:27,631 --> 00:02:29,742 Dad, did you knock over Vera's British chimney sweep 69 00:02:29,766 --> 00:02:31,944 "'Ello, gardener" garden gnome and leave your boot 70 00:02:31,968 --> 00:02:34,135 - as a calling card? - Of course I didn't. 71 00:02:34,196 --> 00:02:36,875 -Both of my boots are on my feet. -Dad, 72 00:02:36,899 --> 00:02:38,677 if you didn't do it, you're being falsely accused. 73 00:02:38,701 --> 00:02:40,821 This is the family name we're talking about... 74 00:02:40,886 --> 00:02:43,131 Our second most valuable possession after the generator. 75 00:02:43,155 --> 00:02:44,474 There's only one thing to do: 76 00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,092 run our own independent investigation 77 00:02:46,116 --> 00:02:47,482 and clear your name. 78 00:02:47,585 --> 00:02:50,169 I watch CSI, NCIS, SVU and M-O-N-K. 79 00:02:50,362 --> 00:02:52,173 So I'm pretty much trained to lead you 80 00:02:52,197 --> 00:02:54,357 in a criminal detective case, if you'll have me. 81 00:02:54,383 --> 00:02:55,657 With those credentials? 82 00:02:55,718 --> 00:02:57,567 Huh, we'd be fools to say no. 83 00:02:57,628 --> 00:03:00,086 - This is highly unnecessary. - Objection! 84 00:03:00,264 --> 00:03:02,200 Sorry, I also watch L.A. Law, Chicago Law, 85 00:03:02,224 --> 00:03:06,852 and The Baking Lawyer: "The court, and the cake, will rise." 86 00:03:07,045 --> 00:03:08,281 JUDY: Principal Gibbons, 87 00:03:08,305 --> 00:03:09,585 I have a small speech prepared, 88 00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:11,168 requesting permission to spearhead 89 00:03:11,192 --> 00:03:13,244 an after-school program to paint a new mural 90 00:03:13,268 --> 00:03:15,672 over Whales Watching. Here goes. (clears throat) 91 00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:17,323 "Principal Gibbons, thank you..." 92 00:03:17,347 --> 00:03:19,923 - Permission granted. - Hey, hear me out! Wait, really? 93 00:03:19,983 --> 00:03:22,012 I've been meaning to pay someone to do it, 94 00:03:22,036 --> 00:03:23,963 but this is much better... You'll just need an adult 95 00:03:23,987 --> 00:03:26,112 to supervise you after school hours. 96 00:03:26,265 --> 00:03:28,598 - Ooh, I know the perfect person. - Oh, no, Judy, 97 00:03:28,659 --> 00:03:31,451 I am flattered, but I simply do not have the time. 98 00:03:31,587 --> 00:03:33,581 I work 8:00 to 4:00, then 4:00 to 6:00 99 00:03:33,605 --> 00:03:35,266 I talk to my aunt in Oklahoma. 100 00:03:35,290 --> 00:03:37,690 It's the only window that works with both of our time zones. 101 00:03:37,776 --> 00:03:38,884 Oh, no. Darn. 102 00:03:39,035 --> 00:03:41,253 I guess I'll have to ask someone else. 103 00:03:41,447 --> 00:03:42,532 ALYSON: Are you kidding? 104 00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:44,275 Count this Alys-on Alys-in. 105 00:03:44,299 --> 00:03:45,632 Really? Thank you! 106 00:03:45,784 --> 00:03:47,654 Well, I'm something of a mural queen myself. 107 00:03:47,678 --> 00:03:49,563 Lance, an old friend of mine, once painted me 108 00:03:49,587 --> 00:03:52,122 on the side of a van, wearing a metal bikini, riding a dragon. 109 00:03:52,224 --> 00:03:54,624 The van caught on fire while being chased by the Feds. 110 00:03:54,685 --> 00:03:56,793 Lance got 15 years, no parole. 111 00:03:56,853 --> 00:03:58,965 But don't judge him from that. He's a good guy. 112 00:03:58,989 --> 00:04:00,964 What were we talking about, Judy? 113 00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:03,984 Good afternoon, ma'am. Detective Honeybee Shaw. 114 00:04:04,027 --> 00:04:05,597 These are my associates, Moon and Wolf. 115 00:04:05,621 --> 00:04:07,206 I know who they are. Their mother Kathleen 116 00:04:07,230 --> 00:04:08,805 used to fart on my gardenias. 117 00:04:08,865 --> 00:04:10,969 I'd like you to walk us through what happened the day 118 00:04:10,993 --> 00:04:12,787 of the knocked-over British chimney sweep garden gnome 119 00:04:12,811 --> 00:04:14,880 - that says, "'Ello, gardener." - It was last Salad Friday. 120 00:04:14,904 --> 00:04:16,237 Salad Friday? 121 00:04:16,465 --> 00:04:19,424 Junkyard Kyle comes over every Friday, and we have salad. 122 00:04:19,576 --> 00:04:22,928 When she arrived, she asked why there was some boot on my lawn, 123 00:04:23,079 --> 00:04:25,747 and that's when I discovered that someone had kicked over 124 00:04:25,808 --> 00:04:28,583 my British chimney sweep garden gnome. 125 00:04:28,686 --> 00:04:30,936 We read that you think the boot belonged to our dad. 126 00:04:31,087 --> 00:04:33,254 - Why is that? - It was a Husky Buck brand boot, 127 00:04:33,357 --> 00:04:34,773 and Beef wears Husky Bucks. 128 00:04:34,924 --> 00:04:37,759 Plus, he's a known trespasser on my property. 129 00:04:38,821 --> 00:04:41,095 Look at those disgusting sled tracks! 130 00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:43,668 I'll never forget this, Beef Tobin! 131 00:04:43,692 --> 00:04:45,762 And I never forgot it. Police took the boot 132 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:48,120 for evidence, but I'll show you where it was. 133 00:04:48,313 --> 00:04:50,956 Look. There's still a footprint in the snow. 134 00:04:51,149 --> 00:04:53,069 But it looks too big to be Dad's. 135 00:04:53,118 --> 00:04:55,605 Here, compare it to my boot. Me and Dad wear the same size. 136 00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,348 It's like we're twins, except he's my dad. 137 00:04:57,372 --> 00:04:59,132 MOON: The print is too big. 138 00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:01,227 This proves Beef is innocent. But in order to clear his name, 139 00:05:01,251 --> 00:05:02,970 we need to find out who is guilty. 140 00:05:02,994 --> 00:05:04,897 We've only got one eyewitness. I'll handle him. 141 00:05:04,921 --> 00:05:06,454 I know how to push his buttons. 142 00:05:06,557 --> 00:05:08,159 - (click) - GNOME: 'Ello, gardener. 143 00:05:08,183 --> 00:05:09,716 Oh, yeah, that is delightful! 144 00:05:09,852 --> 00:05:11,955 - Who's our next source? - Well, there's only one person 145 00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:13,628 in town who really loves feet. 146 00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:15,667 He's a perv... We shouldn't talk to him. 147 00:05:15,691 --> 00:05:18,150 But there's another person in town who loves shoes. 148 00:05:18,319 --> 00:05:20,152 Let's go talk to him. 149 00:05:20,321 --> 00:05:21,653 Mural time! 150 00:05:21,846 --> 00:05:24,467 And wow-za, look at this turnout! 151 00:05:24,491 --> 00:05:26,883 I only joined this club so that I could storm out. 152 00:05:26,943 --> 00:05:27,884 Here I go! 153 00:05:27,944 --> 00:05:29,047 JUDY: Okay. Bye, John. 154 00:05:29,071 --> 00:05:30,812 I want to thank you all 155 00:05:30,873 --> 00:05:33,723 for volunteering to be here to help me birth my artistic child, 156 00:05:33,784 --> 00:05:36,501 and I'm refusing the epidural, because I want to feel 157 00:05:36,653 --> 00:05:38,003 when this thing crowns. 158 00:05:38,154 --> 00:05:40,747 Hello, everyone. Your first lesson about art is: 159 00:05:40,899 --> 00:05:42,566 Art isn't about what you see; 160 00:05:42,626 --> 00:05:45,063 it's about what's going on underneath. 161 00:05:45,087 --> 00:05:46,698 I think she's talking about that tiny hat. 162 00:05:46,722 --> 00:05:48,474 Should we go start prepping the wall? 163 00:05:48,498 --> 00:05:50,218 Not so fast, Judy. We don't even know 164 00:05:50,242 --> 00:05:52,403 - what we're going to paint yet. - Well, I have a few ideas. 165 00:05:52,427 --> 00:05:54,094 Judy, Judy, we'll get to it. 166 00:05:54,246 --> 00:05:56,449 But first I'd like to run through a series of exercises 167 00:05:56,473 --> 00:05:59,191 to see what we'd like to scream to the world. 168 00:05:59,384 --> 00:06:02,844 To begin, each student will answer one important question. 169 00:06:02,905 --> 00:06:04,916 What do you think when I say "art"? 170 00:06:04,940 --> 00:06:07,257 - Peanut butter. - That's my breath. Try again. 171 00:06:07,359 --> 00:06:09,776 WOLF: Greg's got everyone's shoe size in town memorized. 172 00:06:09,928 --> 00:06:11,964 - Foot-ographic memory. - GREG: Hey, six wide. 173 00:06:11,988 --> 00:06:14,039 Ten. And... 174 00:06:14,190 --> 00:06:15,894 I'm eight and a half narrow. Nice to meet you. 175 00:06:15,918 --> 00:06:17,958 Greg, do you think you can identify a shoe 176 00:06:18,027 --> 00:06:19,639 - by its footprint? - Husky Buck boot, 177 00:06:19,663 --> 00:06:21,287 Fall/Winter collection, size 12. 178 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:24,107 Wow! Would you happen to know who bought this boot? 179 00:06:24,167 --> 00:06:25,286 Your dad, just last week. 180 00:06:25,310 --> 00:06:26,529 No! Doo doo McGoo! 181 00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,423 You know everyone's shoe size in town. 182 00:06:28,447 --> 00:06:30,608 Why would you sell him a pair of boots you knew wouldn't fit? 183 00:06:30,632 --> 00:06:32,393 Were you setting him up? You like kicking over 184 00:06:32,417 --> 00:06:34,520 old ladies' British chimney sweep garden gnomes, Greg? 185 00:06:34,544 --> 00:06:36,414 - You sick bitch? - I thought they were a gift! 186 00:06:36,438 --> 00:06:37,971 I know his feet, not his life. 187 00:06:38,123 --> 00:06:39,289 Okay, you're in the clear. 188 00:06:39,349 --> 00:06:40,624 We cracked this Greg, 189 00:06:40,684 --> 00:06:42,528 but the truth is gonna be hard-boiled. 190 00:06:42,552 --> 00:06:45,462 Please don't make egg puns out of my name. It's hurtful. 191 00:06:45,564 --> 00:06:48,284 -(screaming) -ALYSON: Yes! Scream at the world 192 00:06:48,325 --> 00:06:49,223 for its injustices! 193 00:06:49,284 --> 00:06:50,742 And... time. 194 00:06:50,894 --> 00:06:53,078 Great screaming. Now, let's try yelling. 195 00:06:53,271 --> 00:06:55,450 (groans) Can't we just get to the paint already? 196 00:06:55,474 --> 00:06:57,176 Sorry I had to leave right in the middle of that... the button 197 00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:59,086 on my pants popped off while we were rolling around, 198 00:06:59,110 --> 00:07:00,419 and now they keep sliding down. 199 00:07:00,570 --> 00:07:02,081 I'm not trying to be sexy or anything. 200 00:07:02,105 --> 00:07:03,566 There are belted pads in the girls' bathroom 201 00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:05,092 that might help hold 'em up. I can grab you one. 202 00:07:05,116 --> 00:07:06,886 Belted pads? Didn't we burn those 203 00:07:06,910 --> 00:07:08,312 with the bras in the '70s? 204 00:07:08,336 --> 00:07:10,264 - What's a belted pad? - It's the only kind 205 00:07:10,288 --> 00:07:12,433 of sanitary product in the bathroom dispensers. 206 00:07:12,457 --> 00:07:15,100 Picture a twin mattress attached to a jockstrap. 207 00:07:15,251 --> 00:07:17,363 You know those swing rides at the amusement park? 208 00:07:17,387 --> 00:07:19,791 Now imagine getting off the ride and still wearing that swing 209 00:07:19,815 --> 00:07:21,868 - for the rest of the day. - I asked Principal Gibbons 210 00:07:21,892 --> 00:07:23,795 if we could get regular pads and tampons, 211 00:07:23,819 --> 00:07:25,899 but he said there wasn't room in the budget. 212 00:07:25,988 --> 00:07:27,868 This is an outrage. Everyone, up. 213 00:07:27,972 --> 00:07:30,857 Join hands! I'm feeling a surge of inspiration! 214 00:07:31,009 --> 00:07:32,929 Up-to-date menstrual products are a basic necessity, 215 00:07:32,953 --> 00:07:34,678 and how better to demand them 216 00:07:34,779 --> 00:07:36,624 than with a gigantic wall painting? 217 00:07:36,648 --> 00:07:37,847 I can already see it. 218 00:07:37,908 --> 00:07:39,752 We'll paint a giant, angry woman. 219 00:07:39,776 --> 00:07:42,096 Uh, actually, I already planned that it would be a cube, 220 00:07:42,153 --> 00:07:43,606 or fingers, so... 221 00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:44,910 Oh, you're right, it's too safe. 222 00:07:45,023 --> 00:07:46,684 It should be giant, angry vagina. 223 00:07:46,708 --> 00:07:49,320 - Ooh! And what about a huge, red river? - Oh, uh... 224 00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:51,322 Yes, Kima! With boats! Filled with women! 225 00:07:51,346 --> 00:07:53,454 - Uh... - And animals? Like Noah's Ark? 226 00:07:53,557 --> 00:07:54,901 - JUDY: Uh... - No. 227 00:07:54,925 --> 00:07:56,791 - Noah's Arkette! - I love this. 228 00:07:56,852 --> 00:07:58,696 Stop! Stop it! Stop! 229 00:07:58,720 --> 00:08:00,198 I mean, I love the idea, I do. 230 00:08:00,222 --> 00:08:02,074 I just, we can just do it as our next mural 231 00:08:02,098 --> 00:08:04,379 after we finish one of the ones I've been dreaming of. 232 00:08:04,434 --> 00:08:06,133 Ham, what do you think? 233 00:08:06,195 --> 00:08:08,653 I think when women's issues are on the table, 234 00:08:08,805 --> 00:08:12,376 it's time for men to sit quietly down at that table and listen. 235 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:13,992 You taught me that, Judy. 236 00:08:14,143 --> 00:08:16,514 Ugh! I totally agree that we need updated products, but... 237 00:08:16,538 --> 00:08:18,722 this mural is a debut of who I... 238 00:08:18,823 --> 00:08:21,649 I mean we... are as artists. You know? 239 00:08:21,710 --> 00:08:23,076 Judy, I agree. 240 00:08:23,228 --> 00:08:24,652 We got to go bigger. 241 00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:27,756 Maybe all the animals get their own, little vaginas. Cute! 242 00:08:31,386 --> 00:08:33,364 Hey, Judy. You got 20 till I got to get on the horn with my aunt. 243 00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:36,330 They changed the price on her peppermint nighttime tea bags, 244 00:08:36,391 --> 00:08:38,661 (chuckles): so it's gonna be a sesh. 245 00:08:38,685 --> 00:08:40,780 I just wanted to run a quick mural idea past you. 246 00:08:40,804 --> 00:08:42,746 I love it... (chuckles) 247 00:08:42,806 --> 00:08:44,617 but I don't think you're going to approve. 248 00:08:44,641 --> 00:08:46,599 - Try me. - Okay. It's a protest piece 249 00:08:46,752 --> 00:08:48,496 against those belted pads in the women's bathroom. 250 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:50,529 It's going to be a huge vagina... 251 00:08:50,680 --> 00:08:51,958 Let me stop you right there, Judy. 252 00:08:51,982 --> 00:08:53,701 You know I hate saying this word, but: 253 00:08:53,725 --> 00:08:56,513 No, we can't have a huge vagina on the wall. 254 00:08:56,537 --> 00:08:58,348 Aw, shucks. Well, what about a mural 255 00:08:58,372 --> 00:09:00,708 of all the different fingers and finger styles across the world? 256 00:09:00,732 --> 00:09:02,707 - Fingers are fun. - Ha-ha-ha! Great! 257 00:09:02,859 --> 00:09:04,729 So fingers are in and vaginas are out. 258 00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:07,453 I don't like the way you said that, but yes. 259 00:09:07,606 --> 00:09:09,400 Guys, bad news. Principal Gibbons accidentally found out 260 00:09:09,424 --> 00:09:12,050 about the protest mural and said we absolutely can't do it. 261 00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:15,536 So I guess let's just move on to other ideas, such as, uh, 262 00:09:15,597 --> 00:09:17,889 - when you take a sick day... - Judy, stop! 263 00:09:18,082 --> 00:09:20,027 I knew this would happen. But, you know, 264 00:09:20,051 --> 00:09:22,062 real artists ask for forgiveness, not permission. 265 00:09:22,086 --> 00:09:24,454 - So we should still do it. - That's right! 266 00:09:24,514 --> 00:09:26,639 We can't let the Man tear us down! 267 00:09:26,792 --> 00:09:28,625 Yes. Let the gates of chaos open 268 00:09:28,685 --> 00:09:30,463 and blood rain down, or whatever. 269 00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:32,215 Or maybe we can make an even bigger statement 270 00:09:32,239 --> 00:09:34,388 by not making a statement at all? 271 00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:37,428 - Ham, what do you think? - I think when women's issues are on the table... 272 00:09:37,452 --> 00:09:40,620 Stop listening to women, Ham! What do we know? 273 00:09:43,125 --> 00:09:46,810 - Nice of you to join us, Beef. - What's happening? 274 00:09:46,911 --> 00:09:49,107 We're gonna give you one chance to tell us the truth. 275 00:09:49,131 --> 00:09:51,234 Okay, fine. The pipes technically can handle 276 00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:53,425 two-ply toilet paper, I just don't like it. 277 00:09:53,618 --> 00:09:55,813 Feels like I'm wiping my butt with a blanket! 278 00:09:55,837 --> 00:09:57,765 This is about the boot on Old Lady Vera's lawn. 279 00:09:57,789 --> 00:10:00,151 We know it was you. You're the only person in town 280 00:10:00,175 --> 00:10:01,652 who bought size 12 Husky Bucks. 281 00:10:01,676 --> 00:10:03,454 That was an accident. I thought it said ten. 282 00:10:03,478 --> 00:10:05,937 I want to believe you, Beef. But why not return the shoes? 283 00:10:06,130 --> 00:10:08,681 Why keep them, other than to use them to commit a crime 284 00:10:08,834 --> 00:10:10,795 and give yourself an alibi? You like knockin' over 285 00:10:10,819 --> 00:10:13,100 old ladies' British chimney sweep garden gnomes, Beef? 286 00:10:13,155 --> 00:10:15,429 - Huh? You sick bitch? - No, I don't. 287 00:10:15,532 --> 00:10:17,674 But I don't make returns. Returning a purchase 288 00:10:17,734 --> 00:10:20,004 is like bringing an omelet back to a hen. 289 00:10:20,028 --> 00:10:22,603 She has no use for it, and you look like a fool. 290 00:10:22,664 --> 00:10:25,439 The boots are in my closet. I'll show you. 291 00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:27,108 Wait. One boot? 292 00:10:27,169 --> 00:10:29,330 -(gasps) -Scoundrel! - We caught you red-footed! 293 00:10:29,354 --> 00:10:31,223 - They should both be in here. - Looks like they come 294 00:10:31,247 --> 00:10:34,132 in your size after all, Beef: size guilty. 295 00:10:34,283 --> 00:10:35,692 Yeah, you sick bitch! 296 00:10:35,752 --> 00:10:37,730 Sorry, sorry, sorry. I thought I'd try it, 297 00:10:37,754 --> 00:10:39,565 but I didn't like it. Love you, Dad. 298 00:10:39,589 --> 00:10:41,192 Oof, Judy, what happened? 299 00:10:41,216 --> 00:10:42,660 You look like it rained on your wedding day. 300 00:10:42,684 --> 00:10:44,679 How many times have you used that line? 301 00:10:44,703 --> 00:10:46,572 I've nev... I've never used that line before. 302 00:10:46,596 --> 00:10:48,333 It's just, I was super pumped to do this mural 303 00:10:48,357 --> 00:10:50,076 and make my first artistic mark on the world, 304 00:10:50,100 --> 00:10:51,652 but now everyone wants to turn the mural 305 00:10:51,676 --> 00:10:53,318 into this big protest piece. 306 00:10:53,469 --> 00:10:55,465 - And what's wrong with that? - I know Alyson said 307 00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:57,133 real artists hold up mirrors to society 308 00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:59,293 so that they can see their own disgusting faces, 309 00:10:59,317 --> 00:11:02,051 but just because I wanted to do the common cold or fingers, 310 00:11:02,112 --> 00:11:03,964 does that mean I'm not a real artist? 311 00:11:03,988 --> 00:11:06,572 Am I just some sort of, like, square who likes to paint? 312 00:11:06,725 --> 00:11:08,260 Look, Judy, I've been through what you're going through 313 00:11:08,284 --> 00:11:11,394 in a magical and terrible time known as the '90s. 314 00:11:11,454 --> 00:11:14,155 I wasn't a pope-shreddingly edgy artist like Sinéad O'Connor, 315 00:11:14,257 --> 00:11:15,990 but I wasn't a human cat café 316 00:11:16,051 --> 00:11:18,171 - like Lisa Loeb, either. - So what were you? 317 00:11:18,236 --> 00:11:19,397 (laughs): Richer than both of them. 318 00:11:19,421 --> 00:11:20,845 But also, I was just me. 319 00:11:20,997 --> 00:11:23,159 Good art, bad art, real artist, commercial artist, 320 00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:24,516 none of that really matters. 321 00:11:24,685 --> 00:11:26,478 What matters is that you stay true to you. 322 00:11:26,502 --> 00:11:28,783 So go back in there tomorrow and Jude up the joint. 323 00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:30,500 - "Jude up the joint"? - Yeah. 324 00:11:30,524 --> 00:11:32,168 Maybe you can't get your whole idea in there, 325 00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:34,842 but you could throw in a cube or toss in some fingers. 326 00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:36,920 Oh, I hear you. Thanks, Alanis. 327 00:11:37,021 --> 00:11:38,922 Rock on with your socks on. 328 00:11:38,982 --> 00:11:41,199 "Rock on with your socks on." Oof. 329 00:11:41,392 --> 00:11:43,851 - Maybe you are kind of a square. - I heard that! 330 00:11:43,912 --> 00:11:46,371 I, for one, believe you. You're the best guy I know. 331 00:11:46,522 --> 00:11:48,097 And I know like, 18 guys. 332 00:11:48,158 --> 00:11:50,950 Dad, it doesn't matter if you did or didn't do it. 333 00:11:51,102 --> 00:11:53,064 If the people in this town think you're a criminal, 334 00:11:53,088 --> 00:11:54,598 they'll start treating you like one. 335 00:11:54,622 --> 00:11:56,272 That won't happen, son. 336 00:11:56,332 --> 00:11:58,436 I've lived here my whole life. These are my friends. 337 00:11:58,460 --> 00:12:00,777 He's right, Beef. I've seen it before, in Fresno. 338 00:12:00,837 --> 00:12:02,865 Charlie was everybody's favorite lifeguard, 339 00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:04,683 until he was involved in a neighborly dispute. 340 00:12:04,707 --> 00:12:06,944 Then, he couldn't even show his face at the community pool. 341 00:12:06,968 --> 00:12:09,619 - Really? What was the dispute? - Oh, he drowned a guy. 342 00:12:09,721 --> 00:12:11,265 JUDY: So, is this really 343 00:12:11,289 --> 00:12:13,033 what we want to do, or is it too obvious? 344 00:12:13,057 --> 00:12:14,877 Obvious? What do you mean? 345 00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:16,295 Maybe instead of being so literal, 346 00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:18,089 the mural could be more metaphorical? 347 00:12:18,113 --> 00:12:20,739 Like, a clam or a bunch of women excelling in the world 348 00:12:20,932 --> 00:12:22,982 of business, looking at their watches, 349 00:12:23,134 --> 00:12:25,096 refilling the toner, heads held high. 350 00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:27,390 - Their vaginas are implied. Hmm? - Hey, there, students. 351 00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:29,472 Superintendent Sandy Flarts was so excited 352 00:12:29,532 --> 00:12:32,584 about the groovy finger mural, she stopped by to check it out. 353 00:12:32,753 --> 00:12:34,978 I love fingers, especially thumbs. 354 00:12:35,038 --> 00:12:38,089 (gasps) Does that say, "Huge vagina goes here"? 355 00:12:38,282 --> 00:12:40,811 - Um... - Judy, we talked about this. 356 00:12:40,835 --> 00:12:42,730 This mural is not the appropriate venue 357 00:12:42,754 --> 00:12:45,822 to protest your lack of access to feminine hygiene products. 358 00:12:45,882 --> 00:12:48,658 Lack of access? There are belted pads available. 359 00:12:48,718 --> 00:12:50,621 Yeah, but they're dusty and outdated. 360 00:12:50,645 --> 00:12:52,865 They are vintage and classic. This is totally unacceptable. 361 00:12:52,889 --> 00:12:55,918 - And what authority do you have? - I'm the superintendent. 362 00:12:55,942 --> 00:12:58,001 Well, I work at the mall. 363 00:12:58,061 --> 00:13:00,164 I say we continue on against this oppression. 364 00:13:00,188 --> 00:13:01,966 Or we could just go back to the fingers. 365 00:13:01,990 --> 00:13:04,427 No. T-There is to be no mural painting at all. 366 00:13:04,451 --> 00:13:06,785 Obviously, none of you can be trusted. 367 00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:08,953 - Ah, bummer. - At least we know we tried. 368 00:13:08,997 --> 00:13:11,105 Tried? I started this club. 369 00:13:11,166 --> 00:13:12,791 I lobbied for the art supplies. 370 00:13:12,984 --> 00:13:15,627 This mural was my idea, my dream. 371 00:13:15,820 --> 00:13:17,273 And then you guys had to make it your idea. 372 00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:19,266 And I tried to get on board, but now I don't even get 373 00:13:19,290 --> 00:13:21,615 to paint anything, not even your big Arkette 374 00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:24,855 with animals sailing in it or whatever they're doing in there, 375 00:13:24,879 --> 00:13:26,357 and I'm the only one who even cares? 376 00:13:26,381 --> 00:13:28,509 Oh, geez. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 377 00:13:28,533 --> 00:13:31,034 That we accidentally took a huge opportunity away from Judy, 378 00:13:31,094 --> 00:13:32,977 and now we really upset her? 379 00:13:33,129 --> 00:13:35,629 Oh. I was thinking that I would look amazing in a Jeep. 380 00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:37,148 But you make a good point. 381 00:13:37,300 --> 00:13:39,380 Yeah. Yeah, that's a good point, too, Gill. 382 00:13:43,014 --> 00:13:44,967 Oh. This was my thing. Stupid art. 383 00:13:44,991 --> 00:13:47,050 This is your fault, belted pads. 384 00:13:47,110 --> 00:13:49,719 "See-nih yuhlimaf stralf"? 385 00:13:49,821 --> 00:13:50,720 (gasps) 386 00:13:50,780 --> 00:13:52,905 "Flarts Family, Inc."? 387 00:13:53,058 --> 00:13:54,407 "Flarts" as in Sandy Flarts? 388 00:13:54,559 --> 00:13:56,167 ♪ Bum, bum, bum. ♪ 389 00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:59,153 Time to air-dry these fingers and tickle the computer ivories. 390 00:13:59,256 --> 00:14:02,131 ♪ ♪ 391 00:14:04,919 --> 00:14:06,235 ♪ Work it just a little bit... 392 00:14:06,296 --> 00:14:07,971 "Alexandra"? 393 00:14:09,165 --> 00:14:11,240 ♪ Get back... ♪ 394 00:14:11,301 --> 00:14:13,737 Singles in my area? Interesting. 395 00:14:13,761 --> 00:14:15,812 Oh, no, no. Not now. Focus up. 396 00:14:18,308 --> 00:14:20,193 "Belted pads no longer holding up." 397 00:14:20,217 --> 00:14:22,046 "Backstock to flow into schools." 398 00:14:22,070 --> 00:14:24,345 - I know what I must do. - What? 399 00:14:24,406 --> 00:14:26,217 Oh, nothing. It's just some p-pads. 400 00:14:26,241 --> 00:14:27,514 Never mind. 401 00:14:27,576 --> 00:14:29,178 BEEF: Alaska aloha to you, 402 00:14:29,202 --> 00:14:30,702 Junkyard Kyle. 403 00:14:30,929 --> 00:14:33,705 I have those rusty razors that we were planning to... 404 00:14:33,856 --> 00:14:35,016 Are you avoiding me, Kyle? 405 00:14:35,066 --> 00:14:36,708 What? No, that's crazy. 406 00:14:36,901 --> 00:14:39,102 - I'm just very busy right now. - Oh. 407 00:14:39,162 --> 00:14:40,211 Okay, with what? 408 00:14:40,404 --> 00:14:42,121 Well, I'm at the dentist. 409 00:14:42,273 --> 00:14:43,767 No, you're not. You're right here. 410 00:14:43,791 --> 00:14:45,385 - I just came to drop off... - Wish I could take 'em, 411 00:14:45,409 --> 00:14:47,701 but, uh, we're closed, so get out of here, okay? 412 00:14:47,762 --> 00:14:49,554 Oh, no, dang, you're closed? 413 00:14:49,747 --> 00:14:51,125 Uh, yes, we are closed. 414 00:14:51,149 --> 00:14:52,910 We aren't really closed, I'm just avoiding Beef. 415 00:14:52,934 --> 00:14:55,727 Come over here, let me show you my closed sign. 416 00:14:55,920 --> 00:14:58,137 Guys, we've almost solved the case. 417 00:14:58,289 --> 00:15:01,290 And the only thing we don't know is who did it or why. 418 00:15:01,351 --> 00:15:03,629 Guys, turns out I need you to clear my name after all. 419 00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:05,978 You were right. People are treating me differently. 420 00:15:06,114 --> 00:15:09,390 Junkyard Kyle wouldn't even let me in her junkyard today. 421 00:15:09,451 --> 00:15:11,409 Kyle, huh? The same Kyle 422 00:15:11,560 --> 00:15:13,280 who was actually at Vera's when the boot was discovered? 423 00:15:13,304 --> 00:15:16,139 And who, in fact, discovered it? And now she's avoiding you? 424 00:15:16,199 --> 00:15:18,583 What exactly is the nature of your relationship? 425 00:15:18,734 --> 00:15:20,271 Well, I give Kyle my used razors. 426 00:15:20,295 --> 00:15:22,089 She came over to pick them up on Friday, 427 00:15:22,113 --> 00:15:24,257 but she left while I was getting them from the bathroom. 428 00:15:24,281 --> 00:15:26,110 So let me get this straight. She left abruptly, 429 00:15:26,134 --> 00:15:28,374 without a word, from this house, this past Friday? 430 00:15:28,419 --> 00:15:30,230 - You know what I think? - I wish, babe, 431 00:15:30,254 --> 00:15:32,024 but the mystery corners of your beautiful mind 432 00:15:32,048 --> 00:15:34,157 will keep me guessing till the day I die. 433 00:15:34,258 --> 00:15:36,492 We got to go talk to Junkyard Kyle, then get down 434 00:15:36,552 --> 00:15:37,751 to the Lone Moose Mischief 435 00:15:37,812 --> 00:15:40,163 to get ourselves some Lone Moose justice. 436 00:15:40,223 --> 00:15:42,126 JUDY: Thank you all for coming. 437 00:15:42,150 --> 00:15:43,661 I know I kind of yelled at you earlier about taking my mural 438 00:15:43,685 --> 00:15:45,445 away from me, but everything is different now. 439 00:15:45,469 --> 00:15:47,924 I found out Sandy Flarts isn't just the superintendent. 440 00:15:47,948 --> 00:15:52,191 -She's also the heiress to Flarts Family, Inc. -(gasps) 441 00:15:52,343 --> 00:15:54,786 Oh, no. She's spreading herself too thin. 442 00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:56,474 Flarts Family, Inc. Is the company that makes 443 00:15:56,498 --> 00:15:58,476 those belted pads in the girls' bathroom. 444 00:15:58,500 --> 00:16:00,627 They took a huge hit in the '70s when self-adhesive pads 445 00:16:00,651 --> 00:16:02,429 were invented, and instead of modernizing, 446 00:16:02,453 --> 00:16:03,998 which would have cost them money, they found places 447 00:16:04,022 --> 00:16:05,316 who would still buy their product, 448 00:16:05,340 --> 00:16:07,356 like DMVs and zoos and public schools. 449 00:16:07,417 --> 00:16:08,778 That's why she didn't like our mural. 450 00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:10,693 It messes with her fortune. 451 00:16:10,753 --> 00:16:13,532 - That's corrupt. - It's literally the definition of corrupt. 452 00:16:13,556 --> 00:16:16,285 As I discovered earlier when I looked it up. 453 00:16:16,309 --> 00:16:19,126 This is bigger than my idea or your idea. 454 00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:21,387 Art itself is being threatened. 455 00:16:21,539 --> 00:16:23,834 We must protect it from being silenced by corporate greed. 456 00:16:23,858 --> 00:16:25,391 So the mural is back on? 457 00:16:25,543 --> 00:16:27,821 Sort of. Sandy explicitly said that we weren't allowed 458 00:16:27,845 --> 00:16:30,488 to paint the mural, but she never said anything 459 00:16:30,681 --> 00:16:32,865 about being the mural. 460 00:16:37,055 --> 00:16:38,590 A retraction, huh? (scoffs) 461 00:16:38,614 --> 00:16:39,883 Retractions are for people who get things wrong. 462 00:16:39,907 --> 00:16:41,644 I never get things wrong. 463 00:16:41,668 --> 00:16:43,813 You did this time. Last week, you reported that Beef left 464 00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:47,338 his boot on Vera's property, but that's not what happened. 465 00:16:47,490 --> 00:16:50,082 You see, Kyle and Vera have a longstanding tradition 466 00:16:50,218 --> 00:16:52,563 - they call... - Salad Fridays. 467 00:16:52,587 --> 00:16:54,306 It's my business to know everyone's business. 468 00:16:54,330 --> 00:16:56,826 Right, and they always have Salad Friday's at Vera's. 469 00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:59,684 And that was always okay with Kyle, until it wasn't. 470 00:16:59,877 --> 00:17:01,706 Last week, she made the bold move of suggesting 471 00:17:01,730 --> 00:17:03,782 to Vera that they have salad at the junkyard, 472 00:17:03,806 --> 00:17:06,006 but Vera turned her down. 473 00:17:06,067 --> 00:17:07,661 Said she wouldn't be able to gum her romaine in peace 474 00:17:07,685 --> 00:17:08,671 surrounded by all my junk. 475 00:17:08,695 --> 00:17:10,253 That hurt my feelings. 476 00:17:10,354 --> 00:17:11,623 She stopped over at Beef's on the way to Vera's 477 00:17:11,647 --> 00:17:13,606 to get his used razors. 478 00:17:13,758 --> 00:17:15,461 But when he went to retrieve them, she saw a brand-new pair 479 00:17:15,485 --> 00:17:18,094 of boots just sitting there on the counter. 480 00:17:18,154 --> 00:17:20,099 - And she got an idea. - He said they were too big. 481 00:17:20,123 --> 00:17:22,243 He was just gonna shove them in the closet. 482 00:17:22,292 --> 00:17:24,395 Her plan? She was gonna toss the boot on Vera's yard 483 00:17:24,419 --> 00:17:27,436 and then be like, "Ugh, Vera, who owns a junkyard now? 484 00:17:27,497 --> 00:17:30,106 You do, 'cause there's actual junk in your yard." 485 00:17:30,166 --> 00:17:31,885 Next thing she knew, like a woman possessed, 486 00:17:31,909 --> 00:17:34,218 she was walking up to Vera's, boot in hand. 487 00:17:34,387 --> 00:17:38,222 But her plan had two major flaws: one, she has bad aim. 488 00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,449 GNOME: 'Ello, gardener. 489 00:17:40,510 --> 00:17:41,784 Oh, big baby Jesse. 490 00:17:41,886 --> 00:17:43,697 And two, she didn't know that Vera 491 00:17:43,721 --> 00:17:45,396 already had beef with Beef. 492 00:17:45,548 --> 00:17:47,790 It was a sledding incident, over 30 years ago. 493 00:17:47,850 --> 00:17:50,884 The way that woman holds a grudge is a thing of beauty. 494 00:17:50,945 --> 00:17:53,073 That's why I turned you away at the junkyard. 495 00:17:53,097 --> 00:17:55,959 I just couldn't face what I'd done. 496 00:17:55,983 --> 00:17:57,241 Well, this is a first. 497 00:17:57,393 --> 00:17:59,079 It looks like a retraction is in order. 498 00:17:59,103 --> 00:18:01,206 It'll run tomorrow: "We previously reported the boot 499 00:18:01,230 --> 00:18:02,725 "may have belonged to Beef Tobin. 500 00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:05,991 In fact, the boot definitely belonged to Beef Tobin." 501 00:18:06,144 --> 00:18:07,772 Yep, well, that's technically true. 502 00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:10,156 But what about the part where I didn't commit the crime? 503 00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:11,981 I guess I can throw that in. 504 00:18:12,041 --> 00:18:13,794 - Got 'em! - Hootie & the Yay-fish! 505 00:18:13,818 --> 00:18:15,854 - All right. - This case really did me in. 506 00:18:15,878 --> 00:18:17,153 I got to go away for a while. 507 00:18:17,213 --> 00:18:19,413 If you need me, put a boot on a lawn. 508 00:18:20,424 --> 00:18:22,583 - What's that? - Is it someone's birthday? 509 00:18:22,644 --> 00:18:23,917 Oh, my gosh, wherever does 510 00:18:24,020 --> 00:18:27,522 this metaphorical trail of menses lead? 511 00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:31,169 - Oh, boy. - Behold. 512 00:18:31,227 --> 00:18:34,423 The vagina weeps. Why the long face? 513 00:18:34,447 --> 00:18:37,598 Because I am forced to sit upon a sanitary napkin 514 00:18:37,659 --> 00:18:39,784 attached to a belt, and all I crave 515 00:18:39,977 --> 00:18:41,677 is a sleek, modern tampon. 516 00:18:41,737 --> 00:18:43,121 Or a DivaCup. 517 00:18:43,314 --> 00:18:46,849 BOTH: Woe, woe. Woe betide the vagina. 518 00:18:46,951 --> 00:18:49,443 Who curses you so? 519 00:18:49,504 --> 00:18:52,130 I am so mad at myself for quitting this club. 520 00:18:52,323 --> 00:18:55,708 'Twas Sandy Flarts, the school superintendent. 521 00:18:55,860 --> 00:18:59,137 She makes her blood money from my actual blood. 522 00:18:59,288 --> 00:19:00,954 She silenced our mural. 523 00:19:01,015 --> 00:19:05,125 ALL: But she can't silence our collective vagina. 524 00:19:05,186 --> 00:19:09,480 No Flarts in our arts, no Flarts in our arts. 525 00:19:09,673 --> 00:19:13,151 And also, by the way, I'm the cube for the common cold. 526 00:19:13,344 --> 00:19:15,539 Was that... Did people feel that was coming across? 527 00:19:15,563 --> 00:19:17,655 I need to see you in my office, now. 528 00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:19,635 I don't have enough chairs for all of you, 529 00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:21,384 so bring the Arkette. 530 00:19:21,485 --> 00:19:23,864 Let me guess: You're gonna expel us all for speaking out, 531 00:19:23,888 --> 00:19:26,389 because you're under the dirty thumb of Sandy Flarts. 532 00:19:26,449 --> 00:19:29,892 No! I love it when kids use art to rebel against authority. 533 00:19:29,952 --> 00:19:32,222 - Hello. Footloose. - Hello. 534 00:19:32,246 --> 00:19:33,816 But it's almost a shame Sandy Flarts 535 00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:35,231 wasn't here to see this herself. 536 00:19:35,333 --> 00:19:36,727 Oh, we're doing an encore performance 537 00:19:36,751 --> 00:19:38,067 for the school board. 538 00:19:38,127 --> 00:19:39,179 This was basically a dress rehearsal. 539 00:19:39,203 --> 00:19:40,586 Please don't do that, Judy. 540 00:19:40,738 --> 00:19:43,088 We really need those belted pads to stay. 541 00:19:43,224 --> 00:19:45,277 What? You are under Sandy's dirty thumb. 542 00:19:45,301 --> 00:19:47,685 No, it's just actually a pretty good deal. 543 00:19:47,836 --> 00:19:50,115 The school gets to keep a quarter of the pad profits. 544 00:19:50,139 --> 00:19:52,242 It's what paid for your mural paint. 545 00:19:52,266 --> 00:19:53,952 We also use it for gym equipment, 546 00:19:53,976 --> 00:19:55,342 thumbtacks, dodgeballs, 547 00:19:55,403 --> 00:19:57,030 the snow cone machine for Boy's Day... 548 00:19:57,054 --> 00:19:58,248 Did you just say "Boy's Day"? 549 00:19:58,272 --> 00:19:59,750 And Post-its. 550 00:19:59,774 --> 00:20:01,594 Look, I will agree to use some of that money 551 00:20:01,618 --> 00:20:03,596 to keep a box of tampons in the girls' restroom. 552 00:20:03,620 --> 00:20:05,130 I mean, how much can they really cost? 553 00:20:05,154 --> 00:20:06,765 A hundred bucks? A hundred fifty? 554 00:20:06,789 --> 00:20:08,372 Five dollars and 99 cents. 555 00:20:08,524 --> 00:20:10,524 Really? We could've had them years ago. 556 00:20:10,585 --> 00:20:14,103 Now walk me through why Gill and Ham were businesswomen. 557 00:20:14,163 --> 00:20:16,697 I love it, I just want to understand it. 558 00:20:17,533 --> 00:20:19,311 Hey, Judy! Bummed I missed the performance. 559 00:20:19,335 --> 00:20:20,845 Can you believe adults aren't allowed to just 560 00:20:20,869 --> 00:20:22,481 walk into schools whenever they want? 561 00:20:22,505 --> 00:20:24,074 - How'd it all shake out? - Pretty well actually. 562 00:20:24,098 --> 00:20:26,393 - Principal Gibbons loved it. - I'm proud of you, Judy. 563 00:20:26,417 --> 00:20:28,801 - You are quite the artist. - Really? 564 00:20:28,953 --> 00:20:30,447 You think I'm an artist? 565 00:20:30,471 --> 00:20:32,023 Even though I don't like to make controversial art unless 566 00:20:32,047 --> 00:20:34,159 I'm pushed to the absolute brink by corporate greed 567 00:20:34,183 --> 00:20:35,961 and a deep insecurity about my identity? 568 00:20:35,985 --> 00:20:37,379 You like to make art, don't you? 569 00:20:37,403 --> 00:20:39,048 That's all it takes to be an artist. 570 00:20:39,072 --> 00:20:40,874 But I do feel kind of responsible 571 00:20:40,898 --> 00:20:43,218 that you didn't get to paint the mural of your dreams. 572 00:20:43,267 --> 00:20:44,408 Oh, it's okay. 573 00:20:44,601 --> 00:20:46,204 Well, I noticed a nice, big chunk 574 00:20:46,228 --> 00:20:47,470 of wall behind the mall 575 00:20:47,530 --> 00:20:49,099 that could really use a facelift. 576 00:20:49,123 --> 00:20:50,806 Really? Which wall? 577 00:20:50,866 --> 00:20:52,917 The one next to the dumpster. 578 00:20:53,086 --> 00:20:54,585 Are you serious? 579 00:20:54,778 --> 00:20:56,774 That's way better exposure than the east hallway. 580 00:20:56,798 --> 00:20:58,664 Everyone uses the dumpster. 581 00:20:58,816 --> 00:21:00,727 ♪ Checking our watches late to a meeting ♪ 582 00:21:00,751 --> 00:21:03,427 ♪ Hike our skirts up when we're peeing ♪ 583 00:21:03,620 --> 00:21:06,483 ♪ Business, calling China ♪ 584 00:21:06,507 --> 00:21:08,657 ♪ Women, implied vagina ♪ 585 00:21:08,718 --> 00:21:11,251 ♪ Got to have my coffee and my tweed ♪ 586 00:21:11,354 --> 00:21:14,324 ♪ Wear my tiny glasses while I read ♪ 587 00:21:14,348 --> 00:21:17,090 ♪ Business, crisp collared shirts ♪ 588 00:21:17,151 --> 00:21:19,588 - ♪ I'm a businesswoman ♪ - ♪ Women! Who stole my yogurt? ♪ 589 00:21:19,612 --> 00:21:22,187 ♪ Heads held high up to the sky ♪ 590 00:21:22,340 --> 00:21:24,710 -♪ I hold my head up high ♪ -♪ Heads held high up to the sky ♪ 591 00:21:24,734 --> 00:21:29,345 - ♪ Businesswomen ♪ - ♪ I'm a business woman. ♪ 592 00:21:29,369 --> 00:21:31,369 >>>>oakislandtk<<<<< www.opensubtitles.org