1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
-== [ www.OpenSubtitles.org ] ==-

2
00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:29,000
Sync by fant0m
www.addic7ed.com

3
00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:34,419
And every other day, I
take a short helicopter ride

4
00:00:34,420 --> 00:00:36,299
to Heston Blumenthal's restaurant.

5
00:00:36,300 --> 00:00:38,019
Last night,

6
00:00:38,020 --> 00:00:41,139
I ate a chocolate radio that
still worked in my stomach,

7
00:00:41,140 --> 00:00:44,459
and a flat chicken that was
actually a glass of water.

8
00:00:44,460 --> 00:00:46,059
Even the menu was edible.

9
00:00:46,060 --> 00:00:48,259
They said it wasn't, but I ate it.

10
00:00:48,260 --> 00:00:50,979
Sounds like you're
living the life of Riley.

11
00:00:50,980 --> 00:00:54,979
Well, I actually knew Riley,
and yes, there are similarities.

12
00:00:55,220 --> 00:00:59,219
And yet, there is some sadness in
your life. Tell me about Victoria.

13
00:01:00,100 --> 00:01:03,379
You'll have to forgive me,
there's been quite a few Victorias.

14
00:01:03,380 --> 00:01:04,659
Your wife?

15
00:01:04,660 --> 00:01:08,139
My God, my wife, oh yes, Victoria!

16
00:01:08,140 --> 00:01:12,139
What a fantastic woman. The two weeks
we were married were unforgettable.

17
00:01:13,300 --> 00:01:17,299
She disappeared in mysterious
circumstances, did she not?

18
00:01:17,620 --> 00:01:20,459
She vanished while washing the car.

19
00:01:20,460 --> 00:01:24,179
Despite a search that lasted
nearly five hours, we found nothing.

20
00:01:24,180 --> 00:01:28,139
So naturally, we assumed
the worst. You must miss her.

21
00:01:28,140 --> 00:01:32,139
More than words could say.

22
00:01:32,980 --> 00:01:36,979
I'd give anything to see her
walk through that door right now.

23
00:01:41,660 --> 00:01:44,619
Hey, why don't you
take your clothes off?

24
00:01:44,620 --> 00:01:46,099
What?

25
00:01:46,100 --> 00:01:50,099
Come on, we both knew it was on the cards
as soon as I realised you were a woman!

26
00:01:50,860 --> 00:01:52,779
What if someone were to walk in?

27
00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:56,019
I left strict instructions not to
be disturbed in case we had sex.

28
00:01:56,020 --> 00:01:59,019
There's no way anyone is
walking through that door...

29
00:01:59,020 --> 00:02:00,499
Hello, Douglas.

30
00:02:00,500 --> 00:02:02,859
Victoria!

31
00:02:02,860 --> 00:02:06,859
But I thought you were dead!

32
00:02:10,220 --> 00:02:14,219
I must say, Douglas, you still
don't seem very pleased to see me.

33
00:02:17,260 --> 00:02:20,819
No, no, I must have eaten
some bad stereo system.

34
00:02:20,820 --> 00:02:22,099
How's the wine?

35
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:23,459
How's the wine? Exquisite.

36
00:02:23,460 --> 00:02:26,019
From the chef's own cellar.

37
00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:29,859
What are you doing, Victoria?
Last time I saw you, you were...

38
00:02:29,860 --> 00:02:32,899
Washing the car? Yes, I
imagine you have many questions.

39
00:02:32,900 --> 00:02:36,659
I was under a lot of stress that
day, Douglas. I think we both were.

40
00:02:36,660 --> 00:02:38,259
We both knew it wasn't working.

41
00:02:38,260 --> 00:02:41,379
I picked up my sponge and bucket
with a heavy heart that day.

42
00:02:41,380 --> 00:02:44,459
The rest is a blank.The next thing
I can remember with any clarity

43
00:02:44,460 --> 00:02:47,299
is being on a kayaking
holiday two years later.

44
00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:48,819
That looks good, what's that?

45
00:02:48,820 --> 00:02:51,099
I sort of wish I'd ordered that.

46
00:02:51,100 --> 00:02:55,099
Our invisible desserts have arrived!

47
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:58,619
I know we weren't happy that second
week of our marriage, Douglas,

48
00:02:58,620 --> 00:03:00,859
but give us another chance, as a couple.

49
00:03:00,860 --> 00:03:03,139
I don't know.

50
00:03:03,140 --> 00:03:06,899
I don't think we can just
pick up from where we left off.

51
00:03:06,900 --> 00:03:10,539
No, Victoria, I'm sorry, it's over.

52
00:03:13,460 --> 00:03:16,419
Oh God!

53
00:03:16,420 --> 00:03:19,779
I forgot you could do that.

54
00:03:19,780 --> 00:03:23,779
Maybe we should give it another go!

55
00:03:25,260 --> 00:03:27,859
Nnngh...

56
00:03:27,860 --> 00:03:30,379
Well that is new!

57
00:03:30,380 --> 00:03:31,619
How are you doing that?

58
00:03:31,620 --> 00:03:35,619
That might be the dog.

59
00:03:36,020 --> 00:03:37,539
Heston!

60
00:03:37,540 --> 00:03:39,659
I'd like to introduce you to my...

61
00:03:39,660 --> 00:03:43,659
Wi-i-i-ife.

62
00:03:46,420 --> 00:03:50,219
I want to divorce my wife.

63
00:03:50,220 --> 00:03:51,259
Why are you telling me?

64
00:03:51,260 --> 00:03:52,819
Aren't you with legal?

65
00:03:52,820 --> 00:03:54,739
No.

66
00:03:54,740 --> 00:03:56,099
Remind me?

67
00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:58,899
IT. Relationship manager.

68
00:03:58,900 --> 00:04:02,419
Ah. Well then I probably shouldn't
have told you any of that.

69
00:04:02,420 --> 00:04:04,059
Anyway...

70
00:04:04,060 --> 00:04:06,459
I want to divorce her right now.

71
00:04:06,460 --> 00:04:08,859
Now's too late. Before now.

72
00:04:08,860 --> 00:04:11,979
In fact, I want to have already
divorced her, is that possible?

73
00:04:11,980 --> 00:04:14,539
Well, as I said, I'm not a lawyer, so...

74
00:04:14,540 --> 00:04:18,539
Yes, but you're a relationship
manager, and this is a relationship!

75
00:04:19,660 --> 00:04:21,259
Well, erm...

76
00:04:21,260 --> 00:04:22,699
have you told her yet?

77
00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:26,699
Kind of. I changed my
Friendface profile from "married"

78
00:04:27,260 --> 00:04:29,859
to "it's complicated".

79
00:04:29,860 --> 00:04:32,859
That's not the same as
telling her, Mr. Reynholm.

80
00:04:32,860 --> 00:04:34,699
Yeah, but someone will
pass it on. Why not you?

81
00:04:34,700 --> 00:04:35,579
Yeah, but someone will
pass it on. Why not you? No!

82
00:04:35,580 --> 00:04:38,019
Oh come on! Please break up with

83
00:04:38,020 --> 00:04:40,939
my vanishing, car cleaning
wife! I don't want to do it!

84
00:04:40,940 --> 00:04:42,459
I don't want to do it!

85
00:04:42,460 --> 00:04:44,259
I'll give you...I don't know...

86
00:04:44,260 --> 00:04:49,419
10,000.

87
00:04:49,420 --> 00:04:50,619
Who are you again?

88
00:04:50,620 --> 00:04:52,459
I'm Jen Barber.

89
00:04:52,460 --> 00:04:56,459
I'm with the IT department
at Reynholm Industries.

90
00:04:56,580 --> 00:04:58,819
Sorry, I thought I
was meeting my husband.

91
00:04:58,820 --> 00:05:04,319
Mr. Reynholm asked me to
convey a... a message to you.

92
00:05:15,260 --> 00:05:16,779
Mrs. Reynholm.

93
00:05:16,780 --> 00:05:19,499
How long have you and Mr.
Reynholm known each other?

94
00:05:19,500 --> 00:05:20,579
About ten years.

95
00:05:20,580 --> 00:05:22,939
Ten years, ten wonderful years.

96
00:05:22,940 --> 00:05:24,939
Who are you?

97
00:05:24,940 --> 00:05:27,779
Mrs. Reynholm... Can
I call you Victoria?

98
00:05:27,780 --> 00:05:28,299
No.

99
00:05:28,300 --> 00:05:29,659
Mrs. Reynholm.

100
00:05:29,660 --> 00:05:33,659
Sometimes there is a day
and then there is a night.

101
00:05:34,180 --> 00:05:37,699
Sometimes there is a morn,

102
00:05:37,700 --> 00:05:39,859
and then there is an eve.

103
00:05:39,860 --> 00:05:43,859
Flowers grow, trees are cut down,

104
00:05:44,380 --> 00:05:47,299
babies are born, but...

105
00:05:47,300 --> 00:05:49,019
Lawyers exist.

106
00:05:49,020 --> 00:05:53,019
What are you trying to say?

107
00:05:53,060 --> 00:05:55,859
Oh, I can't do it, I just can't.

108
00:05:55,860 --> 00:05:58,179
Let me guess. My
husband wants to leave me

109
00:05:58,180 --> 00:06:02,179
and he paid you a large amount of money to
spare him the embarrassment of facing me.

110
00:06:02,540 --> 00:06:05,779
Yes, but I'm not going to
take the money... I feel sick.

111
00:06:05,780 --> 00:06:08,699
Of course you do,
you're a normal person.

112
00:06:08,700 --> 00:06:10,299
You're not upset?

113
00:06:10,300 --> 00:06:12,899
No, because I'm not a normal person.

114
00:06:12,900 --> 00:06:15,379
You see, what you're trying
to do here but can't...

115
00:06:15,380 --> 00:06:18,379
If the tables were turned, I
wouldn't find it difficult at all.

116
00:06:18,380 --> 00:06:22,379
In fact, it's how I met his first wife.

117
00:06:23,220 --> 00:06:25,819
I didn't know these were edible too.

118
00:06:25,820 --> 00:06:29,819
They're not.

119
00:06:34,220 --> 00:06:35,579
What's all that?

120
00:06:35,580 --> 00:06:37,979
What's all that? I have to
spend the afternoon with Douglas.

121
00:06:37,980 --> 00:06:40,939
Somehow I've been drafted
into his legal eagle fantasy.

122
00:06:40,940 --> 00:06:43,459
Have you ever spent any
serious time with that man?

123
00:06:43,460 --> 00:06:46,539
He's unbelievable! You should
hear the way he talks about women.

124
00:06:46,540 --> 00:06:50,539
Oh yeah, he's some piece of
work. He's like a sexy Hitler.

125
00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:53,659
I mean, I don't expect
to put on a pedal stool,

126
00:06:53,660 --> 00:06:55,779
but please, show a little respect!

127
00:06:55,780 --> 00:06:58,019
I'm sorry, you don't
expect to be put on a what?

128
00:06:58,020 --> 00:07:00,099
On a pedal stool.

129
00:07:00,100 --> 00:07:04,099
A pedal stool?

130
00:07:04,460 --> 00:07:06,499
What's a pedal stool?

131
00:07:06,500 --> 00:07:08,739
Oh, you know, you put women on it

132
00:07:08,740 --> 00:07:10,819
when you admire them,
you know, the phrase.

133
00:07:10,820 --> 00:07:14,819
Oh yeah, the famous phrase,
"to be put on a pedal stool".

134
00:07:15,780 --> 00:07:17,019
"Pedestal"!

135
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:18,059
What?

136
00:07:18,060 --> 00:07:19,859
"Pedestal" is the word!

137
00:07:19,860 --> 00:07:22,059
What's a "pedal stool"?!

138
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:25,579
Did you really think there was
such a thing as a pedal stool?

139
00:07:25,580 --> 00:07:28,379
Shut up, everyone has blind spots.

140
00:07:28,380 --> 00:07:32,339
Can you help me sort through all
this legal crap, please, Moss?

141
00:07:32,340 --> 00:07:36,099
I'd rather not. I've not had good
experiences with the legal system.

142
00:07:36,100 --> 00:07:36,979
How come?

143
00:07:36,980 --> 00:07:40,979
How come? Well, when I was 11, I broke
the patio window, and my mother sued me.

144
00:07:41,620 --> 00:07:43,699
She sued you?

145
00:07:43,700 --> 00:07:46,259
Yeah, to teach me a lesson.

146
00:07:46,260 --> 00:07:49,899
She's always been a very
aggressive litigator.

147
00:07:49,900 --> 00:07:52,059
Can you even do that,
can you sue your children?

148
00:07:52,060 --> 00:07:55,179
It was kind of a show
trial in the kitchen.

149
00:07:55,180 --> 00:07:56,579
She made a little gallery for the cat.

150
00:07:56,580 --> 00:07:59,339
She made a little gallery for
the cat. Aw... What happened?

151
00:07:59,340 --> 00:08:01,619
She won.

152
00:08:01,620 --> 00:08:04,499
I'm still paying costs.

153
00:08:04,500 --> 00:08:08,499
"Pedal stool"!

154
00:08:10,460 --> 00:08:12,819
212 million quid!

155
00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:14,859
You can't be serious!

156
00:08:14,860 --> 00:08:16,859
Oh, we're quite serious, Mr. Reynholm.

157
00:08:16,860 --> 00:08:20,139
But that's enough to bring
Reynholm Industries to its knees!

158
00:08:20,140 --> 00:08:23,659
Bloody blast, this is up my arse!

159
00:08:23,660 --> 00:08:26,699
That is the amount, it
is not up for negotiation.

160
00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:29,859
Balls from hell, you shit-twins!

161
00:08:29,860 --> 00:08:31,099
Calm down, Mr. Reynholm.

162
00:08:31,100 --> 00:08:33,899
Bollocks to be telling me
to calm down, my old chap.

163
00:08:33,900 --> 00:08:37,899
She wants 220 titty million quid
and you tell me to calm down!

164
00:08:38,020 --> 00:08:39,259
You're fired.

165
00:08:39,260 --> 00:08:40,299
I'm not your lawyer.

166
00:08:40,300 --> 00:08:43,619
Piss off! I'm going to represent myself.

167
00:08:43,620 --> 00:08:45,859
I'm not your lawyer.

168
00:08:45,860 --> 00:08:47,899
You sit there, all confident.

169
00:08:47,900 --> 00:08:51,659
Yeah? But when this goes to Court,
that's when the talking stops.

170
00:08:51,660 --> 00:08:53,459
Mr. Reynholm,

171
00:08:53,460 --> 00:08:55,859
there might actually be
more talking in Court,

172
00:08:55,860 --> 00:08:59,499
this would actually be a comparatively small
amount of talking, what we're doing here.

173
00:08:59,500 --> 00:09:00,419
Oh, I see.

174
00:09:00,420 --> 00:09:00,979
Sorry.

175
00:09:00,980 --> 00:09:04,419
Sorry. No, that's all right,
it's what I pay you for.

176
00:09:04,420 --> 00:09:06,019
Look at her. Cold as ice.

177
00:09:06,020 --> 00:09:10,019
But I tell you this, behind
those shades, she's terrified.

178
00:09:16,140 --> 00:09:18,539
One thing you should
know about me, Jen...

179
00:09:18,540 --> 00:09:21,699
When I put my mind to
something, it gets done.

180
00:09:21,700 --> 00:09:25,299
Representing myself is the
kind of challenge I relish.

181
00:09:25,300 --> 00:09:27,539
Well, you'll have to
do a lot of preparation.

182
00:09:27,540 --> 00:09:30,219
Bring it on!

183
00:09:51,980 --> 00:09:54,499
What's this?

184
00:09:54,500 --> 00:09:57,899
It's my suit. I made it
myself. Took me a few days!

185
00:09:57,900 --> 00:10:00,619
How did you find time
to prepare for the trial?

186
00:10:00,620 --> 00:10:03,419
How did I what?

187
00:10:03,420 --> 00:10:06,339
Mrs. Reynholm, you saythat in
the short time you were married,

188
00:10:06,340 --> 00:10:09,179
you became indispensable
to Mr. Reynholm...

189
00:10:09,180 --> 00:10:11,739
in what way were you indispensable?

190
00:10:11,740 --> 00:10:13,539
I had to brush his teeth.

191
00:10:13,540 --> 00:10:14,779
Really?

192
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:15,979
Yes.

193
00:10:15,980 --> 00:10:17,339
That's not an expression?

194
00:10:17,340 --> 00:10:18,619
No.

195
00:10:18,620 --> 00:10:19,859
You got the brush,

196
00:10:19,860 --> 00:10:22,579
you applied toothpaste to it,

197
00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:25,419
you moved it into his mouth...

198
00:10:25,420 --> 00:10:29,419
and moved your hand up and down.

199
00:10:29,820 --> 00:10:31,779
Well, if I didn't do
it, he wouldn't do it.

200
00:10:31,780 --> 00:10:35,379
Well, if I didn't do it, he wouldn't
do it. Make a note... "brush teeth".

201
00:10:35,380 --> 00:10:38,219
Now, you're asking for
quite a large amount.

202
00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:40,019
I think it is an appropriate amount.

203
00:10:40,020 --> 00:10:41,659
Bollocks.

204
00:10:41,660 --> 00:10:42,939
Mr. Reynholm.

205
00:10:42,940 --> 00:10:45,499
Yes, your honour?

206
00:10:45,500 --> 00:10:49,499
I would ask you to refrain from using
that kind of language in my courtroom.

207
00:10:49,540 --> 00:10:53,539
And which word in particular
do you object to, your honour?

208
00:10:54,980 --> 00:10:56,779
You only said one.

209
00:10:56,780 --> 00:10:58,139
Could you read it back?

210
00:10:58,140 --> 00:10:59,579
"Bollocks".

211
00:10:59,580 --> 00:11:03,579
Don't read it back!

212
00:11:04,020 --> 00:11:07,179
Why do you say it is
an appropriate amount?

213
00:11:07,180 --> 00:11:09,379
Mr. Reynholm caused me great distress.

214
00:11:09,380 --> 00:11:11,299
I'm entitledto some restitution.

215
00:11:11,300 --> 00:11:15,299
Besides, it's not as if he ever put the
money to good use. As the film proves.

216
00:11:16,260 --> 00:11:19,659
Your honour, may I present the
central exhibit to our case...

217
00:11:19,660 --> 00:11:21,659
It is, I'm afraid, a sex tape.

218
00:11:21,660 --> 00:11:23,859
A sex tape?

219
00:11:23,860 --> 00:11:27,859
Which one?

220
00:11:40,580 --> 00:11:44,579
The alien craft appears to
have dropped its shields.

221
00:11:44,940 --> 00:11:48,659
Thank you, Female Chekhov! Female
Sulu, beam their Captain aboard.

222
00:11:48,660 --> 00:11:51,979
But... Captain...are you sure?

223
00:11:51,980 --> 00:11:54,259
But she's hurt, she may need our help.

224
00:11:54,260 --> 00:11:58,259
Jim, even if she's injured as
you say, I can't do an examination

225
00:11:58,340 --> 00:12:00,579
on a new species
without proper research.

226
00:12:00,580 --> 00:12:03,099
Dammit, Jim, I'm a sexy doctor,

227
00:12:03,100 --> 00:12:05,499
not a sexy scientist!

228
00:12:05,500 --> 00:12:08,099
Female Sulu. You have your orders.

229
00:12:08,100 --> 00:12:10,939
Perhaps the good doctor thinks

230
00:12:10,940 --> 00:12:13,939
certain alien species do not
fall under the Hippocratic oath.

231
00:12:13,940 --> 00:12:17,939
I have never refused treatment to a
patient, Female Spock, and you know that!

232
00:12:24,820 --> 00:12:26,739
I think we've seen enough.

233
00:12:26,740 --> 00:12:29,179
Your Honour, I object!

234
00:12:29,180 --> 00:12:33,179
There's a brilliant bit coming up.

235
00:12:33,740 --> 00:12:37,739
Mr. Reynholm, are you ready to start
your cross-examination of Mrs. Reynholm?

236
00:12:38,180 --> 00:12:41,299
I am, your Honour, but rest assured,

237
00:12:41,300 --> 00:12:43,579
it will be a normal examination.

238
00:12:43,580 --> 00:12:47,579
I am not in any way cross.

239
00:12:48,860 --> 00:12:52,099
You are Victoria Reynholm, are you not?

240
00:12:52,100 --> 00:12:54,499
Mr. Reynholm, we have
already established that.

241
00:12:54,500 --> 00:12:57,739
Might I suggest that you try less
to do an impression of a lawyer

242
00:12:57,740 --> 00:13:01,739
you once saw on the television and make
your case as simply as you possibly can.

243
00:13:03,220 --> 00:13:07,179
Wise words, my learned lud.

244
00:13:07,180 --> 00:13:11,179
Victoria, you've spoken
about the real me,

245
00:13:11,300 --> 00:13:15,259
and I think it's time we heard
a little about the real you.

246
00:13:15,260 --> 00:13:16,939
Isn't it true, that you...

247
00:13:16,940 --> 00:13:20,939
Used to be a man?

248
00:13:22,340 --> 00:13:23,699
No.

249
00:13:23,700 --> 00:13:25,419
It isn't true, you say?

250
00:13:25,420 --> 00:13:27,139
It is untrue.

251
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:31,139
Who am I thinking of?

252
00:13:31,540 --> 00:13:35,539
I think you mean April, the
woman you had a fight with.

253
00:13:38,580 --> 00:13:40,859
No further questions, my lud.

254
00:13:40,860 --> 00:13:43,939
What? Your entire case rested on that?

255
00:13:43,940 --> 00:13:45,619
Yes, your Honour.

256
00:13:45,620 --> 00:13:47,419
Yes, your Honour. No, wait, Mr
Reynholm, you can't leave it at that.

257
00:13:47,420 --> 00:13:51,419
Your Honour, may I confer with my
relationship manager? What's up, Jen?

258
00:13:52,100 --> 00:13:55,739
You've got to request more time
to prepare a proper defence.

259
00:13:55,740 --> 00:13:58,739
Your Grace, may I approach the bench?

260
00:13:58,740 --> 00:14:00,379
Have you brushed your teeth?

261
00:14:00,380 --> 00:14:01,179
No.

262
00:14:01,180 --> 00:14:03,659
No. Then you may not.

263
00:14:03,660 --> 00:14:05,939
Your Grace,

264
00:14:05,940 --> 00:14:09,099
I need to prepare a proper defence.

265
00:14:09,100 --> 00:14:13,099
The one I just did there was rubbish.

266
00:14:14,540 --> 00:14:17,979
Yes, he's some piece of work.

267
00:14:17,980 --> 00:14:21,299
We're all very happy
at Reynholm Industries.

268
00:14:21,300 --> 00:14:23,539
Are you telling the truth?

269
00:14:23,540 --> 00:14:24,819
Yes.

270
00:14:24,820 --> 00:14:27,059
Then why are you
so ill-at-ease?

271
00:14:27,060 --> 00:14:29,299
Well...

272
00:14:29,300 --> 00:14:32,659
If you must know... I was in
a court myself very recently...

273
00:14:32,660 --> 00:14:35,099
This very courtroom in fact,

274
00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:39,099
where I gave testimony
against a former soldier who...

275
00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:44,579
I was having a massage and he
kissed me on my bottom, Your Honour.

276
00:14:44,620 --> 00:14:47,299
I see.

277
00:14:47,300 --> 00:14:49,739
I'm sure you can
understand my discomfort.

278
00:14:49,740 --> 00:14:52,099
Are you all right? Can you continue?

279
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:54,419
I can continue. Thank you.

280
00:14:54,420 --> 00:14:58,419
The way you tell it, your employer
sounds like a paragon of virtue.

281
00:14:59,820 --> 00:15:02,899
That's right. And
furthermore, I would like

282
00:15:02,900 --> 00:15:06,899
to say at this point that I think
this whole case to be a damp squid.

283
00:15:06,980 --> 00:15:09,819
Thank you, no further questions.

284
00:15:09,820 --> 00:15:12,339
Oooh! I have one more
question, your Honour.

285
00:15:12,340 --> 00:15:13,899
Yes?

286
00:15:13,900 --> 00:15:17,659
What did you say?

287
00:15:17,660 --> 00:15:18,699
What?

288
00:15:18,700 --> 00:15:21,819
What did you say the case was?
May I have it read back please?

289
00:15:21,820 --> 00:15:25,019
"I believe this entire case
to be a bit of a damp squid."

290
00:15:25,020 --> 00:15:27,379
"A damp squid?"

291
00:15:27,380 --> 00:15:29,259
What does that mean?

292
00:15:29,260 --> 00:15:32,899
Oh, Jen, it's an expression.

293
00:15:32,900 --> 00:15:35,459
It means that I believe

294
00:15:35,460 --> 00:15:38,659
that everything that's been said
in this case, everyone already knew.

295
00:15:38,660 --> 00:15:40,659
Yes, but did you say "damp squid"?

296
00:15:40,660 --> 00:15:42,139
That's right.

297
00:15:42,140 --> 00:15:44,819
Did you not mean, "damp squib"?

298
00:15:44,820 --> 00:15:48,059
No, it's "squid".

299
00:15:48,060 --> 00:15:50,699
What's a squib?

300
00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:53,499
It's not "squid".
Squids are already damp!

301
00:15:53,500 --> 00:15:56,179
Hence the phrase!

302
00:15:56,180 --> 00:15:57,459
Your Honour! Please!

303
00:15:57,460 --> 00:15:59,019
It is "squib".

304
00:15:59,020 --> 00:16:02,419
I must say, I find it extraordinary
that you, a man in your early 30s,

305
00:16:02,420 --> 00:16:06,419
could have reached this point in your
life without knowing that it is "squib".

306
00:16:08,820 --> 00:16:10,059
I think it's "squid".

307
00:16:10,060 --> 00:16:11,619
I have no further questions.

308
00:16:11,620 --> 00:16:12,739
No, no, no, wait, wait, wait!

309
00:16:12,740 --> 00:16:13,459
That will be all.

310
00:16:13,460 --> 00:16:14,739
Everyone has a blind spot!

311
00:16:14,740 --> 00:16:18,739
I said that will be all!

312
00:16:21,540 --> 00:16:25,219
Your name is Maurice Moss, is it not?

313
00:16:31,420 --> 00:16:35,419
Your name is Maurice Moss, is it not?

314
00:16:36,900 --> 00:16:40,899
Sorry, bit nervous... So... Yeah...

315
00:16:42,420 --> 00:16:43,659
Fizzy! It's very fizzy.

316
00:16:43,660 --> 00:16:45,539
It's fizzy. Gone fizzy.

317
00:16:46,020 --> 00:16:48,819
Ow, come on!

318
00:16:48,820 --> 00:16:51,379
That's electric. That's
electric in there.

319
00:16:51,380 --> 00:16:54,139
Just got a shock.

320
00:16:54,140 --> 00:16:56,819
Your name is Maurice Moss, is it not?

321
00:16:56,820 --> 00:16:58,739
It is not.

322
00:16:58,740 --> 00:17:02,659
Sorry, yeah, sorry, sorry.

323
00:17:02,660 --> 00:17:05,099
My mother sued me.

324
00:17:05,100 --> 00:17:07,539
Relax. Take your time.

325
00:17:07,540 --> 00:17:10,619
Try to answer the questions
as clearly as you can.

326
00:17:10,620 --> 00:17:14,619
Thank you, my love.

327
00:17:22,060 --> 00:17:26,059
Your name is Maurice Moss, is it not?

328
00:17:27,340 --> 00:17:31,339
Chair. It was the chair's fault.

329
00:17:53,580 --> 00:17:57,579
No further questions, my lud.

330
00:18:36,980 --> 00:18:38,419
Don't you have anything?

331
00:18:38,420 --> 00:18:41,899
She's going to take you to
the cleaners, Mr. Reynholm.

332
00:18:41,900 --> 00:18:45,899
Yup, I suppose she will.

333
00:18:51,020 --> 00:18:54,979
What's that?

334
00:18:54,980 --> 00:18:57,499
Oh, God.

335
00:18:57,500 --> 00:19:01,499
I think I may have found our miracle.

336
00:19:04,100 --> 00:19:06,499
Can you state your full name, please?

337
00:19:06,500 --> 00:19:10,499
Richmond Felicity Avenal.

338
00:19:14,300 --> 00:19:17,019
And you worked at Reynholm
Industries for a time?

339
00:19:17,020 --> 00:19:18,499
I did, for over four years.

340
00:19:18,500 --> 00:19:19,779
And what did you do?

341
00:19:19,780 --> 00:19:22,699
I don't know.

342
00:19:22,700 --> 00:19:23,899
Why did you leave?

343
00:19:23,900 --> 00:19:27,259
Well, my life wasn't really going
anywhere. I was part of the whole

344
00:19:27,260 --> 00:19:30,979
goth/ death metal subculture
but it wasn't making me happy.

345
00:19:30,980 --> 00:19:33,259
It was all a bit gloomy.

346
00:19:33,260 --> 00:19:37,259
It was round about that
point that I developed scurvy.

347
00:19:37,820 --> 00:19:40,179
Now that sounds unpleasant.

348
00:19:40,180 --> 00:19:43,979
On the contrary. Catching scurvy was
the best thing that ever happened to me.

349
00:19:43,980 --> 00:19:46,059
It made me take a long
hard look in the mirror.

350
00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:48,499
And I didn't like what I
saw, I can tell you that.

351
00:19:48,500 --> 00:19:51,299
Not just because my
teeth had fallen out.

352
00:19:51,300 --> 00:19:54,619
Which is why I founded From Goth2Boss.

353
00:19:54,620 --> 00:19:56,779
Is it okay if I play a DVD?

354
00:19:56,780 --> 00:19:59,579
Does it have anything
whatsoever to do with this case?

355
00:19:59,580 --> 00:20:01,419
Not really, Your Honour.

356
00:20:01,420 --> 00:20:03,419
Then you may proceed.

357
00:20:03,420 --> 00:20:05,499
Where are you going? Is it to the top?

358
00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:07,059
If not, why not?

359
00:20:07,060 --> 00:20:09,819
Go to the bloody top! Is
it because you're a goth?

360
00:20:09,820 --> 00:20:13,339
Did you know that goths have some of
the lowest life satisfaction levels

361
00:20:13,340 --> 00:20:16,299
of any subculture with the
exception of traffic wardens?

362
00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:18,419
That's why you don't see
any goth traffic wardens.

363
00:20:18,420 --> 00:20:20,299
That would be a deadly combination!

364
00:20:20,300 --> 00:20:24,299
We at Goth2Boss work with goths
at various locations around the UK

365
00:20:24,300 --> 00:20:26,339
to bring out their hidden potential...

366
00:20:26,340 --> 00:20:30,259
by encouraging them to engage
in everyday, healthy pursuits

367
00:20:30,260 --> 00:20:32,899
such as sports.

368
00:20:32,900 --> 00:20:35,019
Mixing with other humans.

369
00:20:35,020 --> 00:20:37,579
Extended laughter sessions.

370
00:20:37,580 --> 00:20:40,379
Introducing colour to your wardrobe.

371
00:20:40,380 --> 00:20:42,619
Just look at these results.
This is Debbie. She used to

372
00:20:42,620 --> 00:20:45,339
hang around railway stations
with her hands in her sleeves.

373
00:20:45,340 --> 00:20:47,579
Now she's a lifeguard in Mumbai!

374
00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:50,819
From Goth2Boss, you know it makes
sense. Unless you're not a goth,

375
00:20:50,820 --> 00:20:53,779
in which case, from
Goth2Boss. Remember the name.

376
00:20:53,780 --> 00:20:55,659
But what does that have to do with

377
00:20:55,660 --> 00:20:57,979
my divorce proceedings, m'kind fellow?

378
00:20:57,980 --> 00:21:00,419
Well, Mr. Reynholm, I'm here
to tell you that that woman

379
00:21:00,420 --> 00:21:04,419
is not Victoria Reynholm!

380
00:21:05,820 --> 00:21:07,499
Her name is Melanie Crawford,

381
00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:10,739
a former From Goth2Boss pupil of mine!

382
00:21:10,740 --> 00:21:14,739
Sing, you canary!

383
00:21:16,260 --> 00:21:20,259
Well, during our sessions, she seemed
more interested in you than getting better.

384
00:21:21,100 --> 00:21:24,219
I don't think she ever truly
exorcised the goth within.

385
00:21:24,220 --> 00:21:26,299
Scratch away that fake tan

386
00:21:26,300 --> 00:21:30,299
and beneath you'll find
the purest white foundation!

387
00:21:32,100 --> 00:21:35,699
Yeah, that was more of
a phrase than anything.

388
00:21:35,700 --> 00:21:39,699
Oh, actually... No
sorry, that's not her!

389
00:21:40,860 --> 00:21:44,859
Oh, sorry about that. That's not her.

390
00:21:46,660 --> 00:21:49,139
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury.

391
00:21:49,140 --> 00:21:53,139
You've heard a few things over the
past few days, none of which cast me

392
00:21:54,220 --> 00:21:56,339
in a particularly favourable light.

393
00:21:56,340 --> 00:22:00,339
Stories of expensive sex tapes,
rumours of me killing my first wife.

394
00:22:01,100 --> 00:22:05,099
No. No-one's mentioned that.

395
00:22:08,220 --> 00:22:11,859
You know, there's one
thing I do want to say.

396
00:22:11,860 --> 00:22:15,859
Just one thing, that I...

397
00:22:22,300 --> 00:22:25,739
Mr. Reynholm?

398
00:22:25,740 --> 00:22:29,019
Mr. Reynholm, please.

399
00:22:29,020 --> 00:22:33,019
Mr. Reynholm, this really is the most
pathetic display I have ever seen.

400
00:22:35,140 --> 00:22:36,979
May I say something, your Honour?

401
00:22:36,980 --> 00:22:38,019
Why not?

402
00:22:38,020 --> 00:22:40,779
Lying here,

403
00:22:40,780 --> 00:22:44,779
pretending to have a heart
attack, you see a desperate man.

404
00:22:45,580 --> 00:22:47,019
Not pretending.

405
00:22:47,020 --> 00:22:50,859
Not pretending. A man who has exhausted
all of his time, all of his resources,

406
00:22:50,860 --> 00:22:54,859
on an expensive trial that
has resulted in humiliation.

407
00:22:58,540 --> 00:23:02,539
But think not of him. Think of the
employees of Reynholm Industries.

408
00:23:03,060 --> 00:23:05,779
Think of the man who
was sued by his mother.

409
00:23:05,780 --> 00:23:09,779
The simpleton who thought the
phrase "damp squid" was correct.

410
00:23:11,180 --> 00:23:15,179
These are the people I want you to
consider when making your judgement.

411
00:23:17,460 --> 00:23:21,459
For Reynholm is not just the
name of this ridiculous man

412
00:23:22,380 --> 00:23:26,259
who keeps opening his eyes
whenever he thinks no-one's looking.

413
00:23:26,260 --> 00:23:30,259
Reynholm is the name of the family
his employees have found in each other.

414
00:23:33,460 --> 00:23:37,339
We are all Reynholms.

415
00:23:37,340 --> 00:23:40,219
Hurt him, and you hurt...

416
00:23:40,220 --> 00:23:41,819
Oh, all right then,
we'll take 70 million.

417
00:23:41,820 --> 00:23:43,819
Hooray!

418
00:23:46,860 --> 00:23:48,859
I'm getting oak.

419
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:12,000
Sync by fant0m
www.addic7ed.com

420
00:24:13,305 --> 00:25:13,411
Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/34fs5
Help other users to choose the best subtitles